Skip to main content

tv   BBC Ouch  BBC News  September 7, 2019 4:30am-5:00am BST

4:30 am
rescuers in the bahamas are searching the island of great abaco for the bodies of people killed by hurricane dorian. hundreds are still missing. a relief operation is under way with un, us and british involvement. however, some communities haven't yet been reached and are in desperate need. india's attempt to land a spacecraft on the moon appears to have failed. scientists lost contact with the landerjust as it was about to touch down on the lunar surface. the unmanned vikram probe was above the moon's south pole when data stopped transmitting from the spacecraft. the british prime minister's demand for an early general election looks set to be rejected after opposition parties agreed to block it when it is put to mps on monday. they said that preventing the uk leaving the eu without a deal at the end of october is their priority. now on bbc news, blind comedian
4:31 am
chris mccausland hosts the second part of a comedy and storytelling show featuring funny and fascinating stories told by disabled people and those with mental health difficulties. this programme contains discussion of some adult subjects. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome your host for tonight... chris mccausland! applause hello, ladies and gentlemen! welcome to ouch: storytelling live
4:32 am
at the edinburgh festival fringe! applause ijust i just turned 42, ijust turned 42, a month ago. i am enjoying being in my 40s, ifeel good for it. i don't do birthday parties though. i didn't even have a 40th. my parties though. i didn't even have a aoth. my mates, they took me to see guns and roses live, also they told me anyway. we could have just gone to their houses and put the live album on, sarge mesic —— charge me six quetiapine for three hours. not as busy as you would have thought this guns and roses concert, not as popular as they were? it sounds a bit weird, there is a cat, but never mind. we have a series of storytellers today who each have a disability or mental health difficulty. some of these guys never have been on stage before. the theme
4:33 am
this year is "lost and found" and we have let the guys interpret that however they want to. the only criteria is that the stories are all true. so let me ask you, are you ready for your first storyteller of the show? yes! what i want is a lot of love, support for reece finnegan! (applause). hello. ifeel like being lost and getting lost is pretty integral to being a blind person. i'm 23, i have been blind eye life. the story i'm telling is about when i got lost in my brand—new bass's house. last year, it is a saturday morning and it hung over, i have, i am all by myself and i have a dead phone and none of my possessions. so all i can rememberfrom the night before is that i have been for some drinks with some new colleagues
4:34 am
after work. after a couple of bars, one of them, the bosses son, jay, invite a couple of us back to his house in kensington for some after drinks. about nine hours later i wa ke drinks. about nine hours later i wake up in this random place with no idea where i am and no sign of my collea g u es idea where i am and no sign of my colleagues anywhere. this house was huge, it was a mansion. fourfloors and tons of rooms. really hard to navigate. believe me, when you are visually impaired trying to get out of disabled toilet without feeling up of disabled toilet without feeling up the changing table is hard enough, so this was a massive struggle. i am enough, so this was a massive struggle. iam in enough, so this was a massive struggle. i am in a enough, so this was a massive struggle. iam in a rush enough, so this was a massive struggle. i am in a rush because i'm trying to get home for my nephew's first birthday party, so i get out of bed and i come to the first door which happens to be an ensuite toilet. i'm there for five or ten minutes, and then i hear suddenly there's a voice coming from close by, this unfamiliar female voice, saying" hey reese, is jay's mum, jay told me you are saying and ijust wa nted told me you are saying and ijust wanted to see if you are ok, i am
4:35 am
flying to la in five minutes." so the advice in this situation for a blind person is that if you are offered help you to properly take it when it is offered, because you don't know when it will be offered again. ididn‘t don't know when it will be offered again. i didn't do that, i was so shocked and awkward to hear someone close by when i thought i was casually on the toilet, that all i could do was just squeak back "no, i am fine thank you, i am good." to make matters worse when i stood up and pulled my trousers up, i was feeling around for a sink and i found another door to the bathroom, but it was one that had been opened the entire time, and a door which jay's mum had been standing in while she was talking to me. so not only was this not an ensuite toilet, my new mate's mum had been talking to me with my pants down the toilet. i think she did not have business in la, ithink think she did not have business in la, i think she was just flying
4:36 am
there to escape the unbearable awkwardness of the situation. so dignity atan awkwardness of the situation. so dignity at an all—time high obviously, i thought, dignity at an all—time high obviously, ithought, what dignity at an all—time high obviously, i thought, what have i got less to lose? i'm going to go and explore, try and buy my stuff and explore, try and buy my stuff and get out of quick as possible, jay's mum was already gone. so i come out of this new door and come into a hallway, which hasjust so many doors coming off it, an absolute labyrinth. i have no idea what i am going, so ijust edged in one direction down the hallway. i got to some stairs, nice big spiral staircase, and i am congratulating myself because i am going well so far, minus the toilet incident. it is going all right until i reach the top of the stairs and i clang into something giant and metal. i stumbled back a bit, fully expecting some kind of home alone trap to just unleash itself on me, and it turned out to be a massive suit of armour
4:37 am
just leaning against the wall. so it's not what you would expect to find when you are just strolling through a house. it dawned on me at this point, this is my bass's house, so this point, this is my bass's house, so there is a lot of expensive stuff around, i have only been at this job for two weeks as well, so i am pretty sure rampaging through priceless ornaments is not going to do me any favours at this job. eventually i find myself in a cloakroom, i was feeling my way around just coats and bags, the biggest room i have ever been in my life, it was crazy. i am in there andi life, it was crazy. i am in there and i heara noise, it life, it was crazy. i am in there and i hear a noise, it sounds like footsteps. maybe someone can help me. the other thing is that i felt a bit of panic, because i don't know about other visually impaired people but i don't like not having my symbol came, i don't really like not having it on me if i am eating you people. just because it avoids —— avoids awkwardness, it avoids
4:38 am
awkward questions like "who are you, why are you in my house", i didn't haveit why are you in my house", i didn't have it on me unfortunately. so i just kind of sheepishly came out of the cloakroom, my hands up, i promise i'm not ogling you. it was not a person but turned out to be a cat. i am not religious at all but i think this was an absolute miracle, a divine animal sent by the disability friendly gods, who saw my time of need and sent me a messenger. this cat brushes past my leg and it kind of leads me down a new corridor, which i don't think i would have seen by myself because it was quite emily let and has a little bell on its colour, so very helpful. i follow this cat and i go into room, which turns out to be a massive, beautiful kitchen. in there ifind a massive, beautiful kitchen. in there i find a housekeeper who massive, beautiful kitchen. in there ifind a housekeeper who is massive, beautiful kitchen. in there i find a housekeeper who is very confused to see me, but very
4:39 am
friendly, and she pointed me to all of my stuff just sitting there friendly, and she pointed me to all of my stuffjust sitting there on the kitchen table, my bag, my symbol came, my charger, everything i needed. i nearly collapsed with release. i was so happy. i charge my phone, got out of there, don't have a happy ending. i made it to my nephew's birthday on time, i got out of the house independently with a bit ofan of the house independently with a bit of an assist from the miracle cat, and even better, later on i found out that my boss found another one of my colleagues downstairs passed out in his hands on the sofa. so compared to him, i didn't do too badly. thank you so much. (applause) . ladies and gentlemen, give it up for reece finnegan. cheering and applause. please welcome to the stage, sarah collins! cheering and applause. hi. i have a condition thatis
4:40 am
applause. hi. i have a condition that is often erroneously called bureau. it is short for purely obsessional ocd, it does not involve some of your traditional compulsions like abscess of hand washing, can —— cleaning or performing rituals. —— puro. symmetry does not do much for me. i could not care less about whether my vision notes are colour—coded or not. my bedroom is the messiest room you have ever seen in your life. research has shown that purely obsessional ocd is not obsessional at all. we have compulsions but they don't look like your traditional variety. my compulsion is reassurance seeking, which means asking my poor mother over and over again whether she is absolutely sure i won't put her in front of a train. that she can guarantee that no—one is filming me
4:41 am
through the camera on my laptop screen. when living with ocd, it is easy to get lost in a tunnel where i am being guided by a voice that is not my own. the voice does not reflect my values or my personality, the voice is melodramatic, attention seeking and downright mean. and i'm not like that at all! it is most extreme, the voice can generate false memories. a few years ago, i went on a massive night out to celebrate the end of my a—levels with my friends. sorry, i am getting ocd about performing this thing about ocd, so... just bear with me... (applause). while i untangle that one. so a few years ago, i went ona that one. so a few years ago, i went on a massive night out with my friends to celebrate my a—levels. however, for me, the after effects
4:42 am
of drinking can extend well beyond the usual case of hangover anxiety. on this particular night out, i knew i had overdone it so when i got in, i got i had overdone it so when i got in, igota i had overdone it so when i got in, i got a huge glass of water and p°pped i got a huge glass of water and popped to paracetamol tablets. i was drunk, but aware. the next day i woke up with a massive headache, and lay motionless for a few minutes, running back through the memories from the night before. i saw myself coming into the house, going into the kitchen, getting the glass of water and the paracetamol, and then it came. the intrusive thoughts. i had taken a whole box of paracetamol ta blets. had taken a whole box of paracetamol tablets. i could feel the sensation of the cardboard in my fingers, the feeling of swallowing each tablet. i was in danger, grave danger. i ran downstairs in search of the physical evidence. i rifled through the cupboard, i found just one
4:43 am
evidence. i rifled through the cupboard, ifound just one box of paracetamol, and it was almost full, with only two tablets missing. with overwhelming relief i realise i was going to be fine. i was fine. but hang on? how could i be sure. how could i be absolutely, ioo% hang on? how could i be sure. how could i be absolutely, 100% sure that the box of paracetamol that was in the cupboard was the same box that had been there last night? what ifi that had been there last night? what if i had taken all those tablets and then drunkenly throwing the box in then drunkenly throwing the box in the bin? and just like that, there it was. another memory. i could hear the bin clanging shut. oh god. oh god! i was going to have to look through the bin. i thought about putting some rubber gloves on, but really, when i was mere hours away from certain death by liver damage, was a bit of bin dew is going to hurt me? i have never looked less like your stereotypical ocd sufferers than in that moment. when
4:44 am
i was leaning over the bin, face down, our supper, drawing i was leaning over the bin, face down, oursupper, drawing through multi— cabbage in search of some empty paracetamol boxes. there were no boxes in the bin full stop and then i had a brainwave. i am a millennial. however drunk i was i would never forget to recycle. (laughs). check the recycling, no boxes. there was only one thing for it. call 111. "hello one—on—one, what is your problem today?". i think i might have tarik —— taken a paracetamol overdose. "and how many ta blets paracetamol overdose. "and how many tablets have you taken in the past 24 tablets have you taken in the past 2a hours? "i think i have only taken two ta blets, 2a hours? "i think i have only taken two tablets, but i was drunk and i am not sure and i have this feeling i have taken a paracetamol overdose.
4:45 am
"but you can only remove taking two ta blets ? "but you can only remove taking two tablets? you have just "but you can only remove taking two tablets? you havejust got "but you can only remove taking two tablets? you have just got a feeling you have taken a paracetamol overdose? " you have taken a paracetamol overdose? yes, and ifeel drunk and tired and awful. "i think you have just got hangover love. " that was the official opinion, i was going to live, i could get on with my day. it was until i was on the train to birmingham with my sister, and along came another thought. this time it was me, lying in a hospital bed with tubes all over me. then it was words flashing against a black screen. " you could have prevented this. you could have gone to hospital and had your stomach pumped. if only you had listened to me!". the train pulled into the station and i had my plan. i told my sister i needed to get a few books, some folders for when i was going to uni. i sprinted to catch a train heading to the station nearest to
4:46 am
the queen elizabeth hospital university of birmingham. i sent stu d e nts university of birmingham. i sent students flying as i barged up the escalators through the gates, across the road and stopped directly outside the glass double doors to a&e. i paused forjust one second, and breathed. even though i knew i was, i was utterly and completely lost in a world of menacing thoughts. even a fun night out with friends from my a—levels had a sinister consequence. this wasn't a life. i had to be brave. i replayed the memories from the night before. i walked into the kitchen, i got a glass of water, i tookjust to paracetamol tablets, and i went to bed. my brain was screeching at this point, "but what about the other memories? you can afford to take this risk, i.e. that stupid, do you wa nt to this risk, i.e. that stupid, do you want to die? but when i tried to
4:47 am
recall the other memories, the 2a ta blets, recall the other memories, the 2a tablets, the bin, theyjust disappeared. they morphed and switched into other terrifying fears, other horrible what ifs. and then, underneath the rest of the chatter, but growing louder and louder, i heard my own voice. "turn around, sarah, and walk away. you can do this." in front of me, people with broken legs and raging fevers we re with broken legs and raging fevers were hobbling into a&e. i turned around. i walked were hobbling into a&e. i turned around. iwalked back were hobbling into a&e. i turned around. i walked back towards the station, back towards life, i wasn't lost anymore. thank you very much. (applause). herfirst time on her first time on stage, sarah cummings, guys. ok, to finish the show, make some noise forjoe wells. applause hello. hello, edinburgh. are you
4:48 am
well? yes. good. this is my story about losing my headphones. i should give you some background to this story. i'm an autistic man. i've been a man for 12 years. before then, i was a boy, been a man for 12 years. before then, iwas a boy, and i have been a man for 12 years. before then, i was a boy, and i have always been autistic. but i only had the diagnosis earlier this year, and when you get that diagnosis, you spend a lot of time, too much time, wondering about stuff that happened in your past, negative experiences. would that have all been different if it had this diagnosis? one thing i say for a fact, it's helped explain things for me, like there's a lwa ys explain things for me, like there's always been things which i really disliked, but everyone else seems to love. the main three things are eye contact, the sound of men's voices, and the arctic monkeys. —— arctic monkeys. the third one, that's not an autistic thing, i just think
4:49 am
monkeys. the third one, that's not an autistic thing, ijust think — i just think there are really overrated man. people talk about whether they are the next beatles,. talking about eye contact, i think it is weird. i think it is weird that you people do that think about what i contact is. we've all got two jelly balls that we hold inside our skulls, and we walk around sucking in light into ourjelly bowls at all times, and when you want to be polite to someone, you are supposed to point yourjelly bowls to their jelly bowls, sucked all the light of their jelly bowls, they jelly bowls, sucked all the light of theirjelly bowls, they return the favour, they suck the light of your jelly bowls while you're sucking the light of their jelly jelly bowls while you're sucking the light of theirjelly bowls in a mutual jelly bowls light of theirjelly bowls in a mutualjelly bowls sucking thing. i find that weirdly intimate, when you've just met find that weirdly intimate, when you'vejust met someone, find that weirdly intimate, when you've just met someone, to immediately suck on theirjelly balls. i used to get in trouble at school. i had a science teacher who used to say to me, joe, you have to make eye contact to me, otherwise i don't know you are listening to me. what kind of biology teacher are
4:50 am
you? do you think you listen with your eyes? but i don't like men's voices, either. ifind... apologies to any man in the room. i don't hate men, ijust hate men's voices. men's voices sound like somebody is driving a motorbike through a wood chipper, it's like... chainsaw sound. i like craft beer. ifind that really distressing, i don't like it at all. particularly more than one man, three or more men talking over the top of each other, i don't like that. it's why i don't watch top gear. i don't like it at all. so i avoid men's voices as much asi all. so i avoid men's voices as much as i can. i can't always do that. i work as a comedian so i have to get late trains a lot and men are drunk in the late trains. i hate the sound of drunk men's voices, and i never knew why that was until i had this diagnosis. i used to have to come up with a reason why, and what i
4:51 am
thought i had worked out was that i hate the sound of men's voices because i am a good feminist and i am very progressive, and i hate the sound of men's voices because it reminds me of all of the misogyny that women endured for millennia. that would make sense as a theory if it weren't for the fact that when i hear men's voices i put my headphones on, i listen to music, andi headphones on, i listen to music, and i listen to mainly gangster rap. i like the rat, i'm sorry, i know it's problematic, but i like it a lot. you can't kid yourself that you are drowning out the sound of toxic masculinity when you are listening to nwa to drown it out. i like gangsta gangsta, best nwa song that iam gangsta gangsta, best nwa song that i am allowed to say. i like that when dr dre, easy e are talking, they take it in turns. i didn't exactly lose my headphones, they broke. and they broke in london. the reason they broke was because i had
4:52 am
only spent £10 on headphones. you should always spend a minimum £20 on headphones, otherwise it is a false economy. if you spend £10 you may have to replace them five times a year, £20 they were last year the whole year. always spend at least £20 on headphones, that's the moral of the story. if you leave today, someone says what was the bbc ouch show about? you tell them it was about how someone should spend minimum £20 on headphones. but i didn't. i was young, naive and reckless, so i spent £10 on headphones. they broke on the tube in london. still got two hour train back to portsmouth, where i live. i was very anxious that they could be men with their loud man voices talking and that would be horrible, andi talking and that would be horrible, and i didn't have anything to drown it out. got on the train, and there is one girl on her own who is drunk, not causing any problems. there is
4:53 am
mother and daughter who have been to a west end show, they are talking about that. there is one man on his own, businessmen on a laptop, that's fine. should be fine, there is no group of men talking. i pick up my book i read my book, 15 minutes it is peaceful, it is fine. and then after about 15 minutes i hear a kind of like a splattering noise, and i look up and i see that the really drunk girl, she has been sick on the floor. quite a lot of sick, just on the floor. and i look up and i make eye co nta ct, the floor. and i look up and i make eye contact, and for the first time in my life i have made eye contact with someone, and they feel less co mforta ble with someone, and they feel less comfortable about it. i look away, she is then sick again. there is sick on sick on floor, and after she's been sick a second time, she gets up to go to the toilet to be sick. that is very much closing the sta ble sick. that is very much closing the stable door after the horse has been fully sick on the floor. but she does that. she gets up and walks past me. i looked up slightly and i
4:54 am
can see that she is ashamed of the fa ct can see that she is ashamed of the fact that she's been sick, and i don't think she should have felt ashamed. everyone has been drunk, andi ashamed. everyone has been drunk, and i don't mind that much that she has been sick, to be honest. it's just some human vomit, it's not three or more men talking. it's fine. but you can't say that to someone, can you? i've got enough social sense to know... sometimes i get kind of social things wrong and there is a thin line between saying i don't mind you being sick and kind of sounding like you are enthusiastic about it. you want to get that right. it doesn't matter what i think, anyway. she feels ashamed and she covers her mouth with her hand out of shame, right? and then she is sick again. now, do you remember school, when in the bathrooms at school the bigger boys would put their thumbs over the taps, right, so the increased pressure of the water... you can be disgusted by this. you are just having to hear about it. i had
4:55 am
delivered in my life. increased pressure, she was sick on me outside of her —— out the side of her mouth. i was shocked, and i looked up and went, you have been sick on me, and she turned round to me. she said i am so... and before she could say ry, she was sick again. that is what happened to me. she was sick and be twice and i had to go from working to portsmouth covered in another woman's sick. but here's the thing. i had this diagnosis this year, and i've been thinking a lot about that diagnosis had changed things? it is easy to fall into that trap where you go everything would have been different if it had this diagnosis earlier, and with that story have been different if i had an autism diagnosis? no, it wouldn't, of course not. i still wouldn't, of course not. i still would have been sicked on, she still
4:56 am
would have been sicked on, she still would have been embarrassed and i still would have looked up at the start and made herfeel embarrassed. i still would have had the splatter. the thing wouldn't have made a difference —— the thing that would have made a difference is if i would have made a difference is if i would have had headphones on. i am not saying to me... it was important to me, having an autism diagnosis, but it is not the most important thing in the world. the most important thing in the world is to spend at least £20 and had bones. applause cheers. ladies and gentlemen, make some noise forjoe wells. and make some noise forjoe wells. and make some noise for everyone you've seen today. you have seen reese finnegan, sarah cummings,joe today. you have seen reese finnegan, sarah cummings, joe wells, my name's chris mccausland. thanks for being amazing, guys. cheers, good night. thank you.
4:57 am
hello there, well, the weather is set mostly fair for us for the weekend, mostly dry with some sunshine. and some showers. northern ireland, north wales, north—west england and northern scotland. so if you are heading outside in these areas it is perhaps worth taking an umbrella with you. the showers, though, fleeting so they won't last very long at all. it is also quite a chilly start for the muggy for north—eastern part of the country. a cool start to the weekend for some but plenty of dry weather and sunshine. just a few isolated showers. now, those showers will continue across northern ireland, north wales, north—west england for a time, maybe not one sneaking into the midlands, and then later on in the midlands, and then later on in the day we could see another shower p°p‘up the day we could see another shower pop—up across east anglia and south—east england. but otherwise it is are mostly dry prospect, really, with sunny spells coming and going.
4:58 am
the cool northerly wind making it feel quite chilly at times across the north—east of scotland. 13 degrees in aberdeen. the highest temperature towards the south—west and 19 in both cardiff and plymouth. now, saturday night promises to be a cold night. clear skies, now, saturday night promises to be a cold night. clearskies, light winds, perfect recipe, really. temperatures get down to about three celsius in newcastle, but in the countryside there could be a few pockets of frost in eastern scotland and north—east england in the very cold est and north—east england in the very coldest areas. so it really could be quite a cold side to the day on sunday. but a lovely start to many of us, plenty of sunshine around. the exception to that is in the north—west, where this stripe of cloud you can see is a warm front. that is going to be bringing a little bit of mist to coast and hills, maybe a few patches for northern ireland and scotland. otherwise another dry and brightly. temperatures a little bit higher across the north—east, so 16 degrees or so across the north—east, so 16 degrees orso in edinburgh across the north—east, so 16 degrees or so in edinburgh and 15th aberdeen. still the highest bridges across southern england and wales. 18,19 degrees, across southern england and wales. 18, 19 degrees, something like that stop now, for monday, we've got a
4:59 am
weather front moving in. stop now, for monday, we've got a weatherfront moving in. an area of low pressure will develop across england and wales. but there is uncertainty about just how england and wales. but there is uncertainty aboutjust how quickly that happens, so when the position of the heaviest rain is a little bit uncertain, but it looks like it is going to be quite a wet day for a number of us, and pretty disappointing temperatures as well. we're looking at highs of around 14— 16 celsius. and looking into the week ahead, this day is quite changeable, there will be some further bouts of rain around, but the driest weather towards the south and east. that's your latest weather. goodbye for now.
5:00 am
lost anymore. thank you very much. (applause). this is bbc world news, i'm reged ahmad. our top stories: the search goes on for hundreds missing in the bahamas after hurricane dorian. those who survived speak of their ordeal: i say, hey, we were friends for almost a0 years. we ride together, we're going to die together here. india's mission to the moon appears to have failed — scientists lose contact with the lunar lander just before touchdown. a wild week in british politics ends with opposition parties uniting against the prime minister's call for an early election. and this week the us passed a grim milestone —

23 Views

info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on