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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  June 4, 2012 11:00pm-11:30pm PDT

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>> okay. okay. >> all right. (hornets buzzing) huh. >> june 4, 2012. from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. ( cheers and applause ) . captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: hey, everybody. wewelcome to the daily show. my name is jon stewart. good program tonight. an amazing program. going to be interviewing two guests, coauthors of book entitled "it's even worse than it looks." it's a book about this thing on my back. no. before we get the show started i do want to say something. tell me you know this. for the past 50 years or so, i've been a fan of the new york mets organization. for that entire 50 years the mets and i have had one thing in
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common. neither of us had ever throne a no-hitter. that all changed on friday night. i was there because i am a cotton candy vendor. you may have actually seen it on sports center. you have not seen the mets' first no-hitter in their existence from my vantage point. this is my eye report. i filmed this. this is the last pitch. everybody is going crazy. the players start running on the field. all that. incredible to be there. for me the greatest part was i was able to share it with my family. my children were there. they i think really appreciated a night of hot dogs, ice cream, popcorn, more ice cream, and then being robustly shaken. (laughing ). both of my kids just did this. they had eaten so much. all i was doing was shaking them around. they both did this.
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what a great... but i suffered much for these mets over my life which is why these moments of joy that occur sporadically are even more appreciated. this met team is a fun team. they're a scrappy team. they play the game right. these 2012 mets. i give you for anybody who wonders at home what the face of a true mets' fan at the end of the first no-hitter of the new york mets' existence looked like. (laughing ). ( cheers and applause ) . all right. there we go. anyway, now if anybody was wondering if i have an o-face, that is it. the main story comes from a celebration across the pond. >> the boat otherwise known as a flotilla honoring queen elizabeth, dressed in white as she celebrated 60 years on the throne. >> jon: 60 years on the throne. get that woman some fiber. it was a magnificent spectacle.
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you could almost see through the inside of a car wash that is england in june. >> when the orchestra starts up, prince philip joins in. camilla takes their lead and the family danced. >> jon: you know, they're not dancing. they're shivering. people can't tell the difference between fun and hypothermia? of course, the majority of america's media still recovering from last year's pomp and circumstance over the royal wedding. only cnn went full flotilla with two solid hours of coverage that could best be described as... >> an orgy of excitement. jon: yes. an orgy. queen elizabeth's diamond jubilee was a [bleep]fest of marvelousness. it was a gang bang of awesome. sort of what you and i appeared
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to be tug boat and garbage barges fess tooned in papier-mache drifting in celebration of a durable old lady's continued non-death was to the trained journalist's high much, much more. >> i have never seen a spectacle quite like this in my life. >> i've seen quite a few royal occasions over the years but nothing quite like this. >> extraordinary. this is fantastic. amazing. bsolutely amazing. this is crazy stuff. what an amazing thing. is this really happening? 'm practically speechless. this is britain at its best. oh, my goodness. it's pulling the 360 we had only heard about. >> a rapid fire 360 turn. i've never seen any boat that size do this. absolutely remarkable. >> jon: i'm getting word there's a schooner doing a k-turn. a schooner. is this somehow the british equivalent of a monster truck show? come down to the thames and see
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a rotating boat. outstanding. if you think the flotilla is exciting, just wait until cnn gets a low load of what's happening come. >> the grand finale where the queen will be witnessing for the fly-by. >> it will be spectacular. -pretty extraordinary. the most spectacular part of the whole thing. >> a lot of people have criticized the queen for not smiling as much. but you say we will definitely be seeing a smile once we see that flyover in a matter of minutes. >> jon: it's the only thing still keeping her alive. the fly-by. it's like boats in the sky. it will make the whole miserable day worth it. >> we have breaking news. jon: oh, no. breaking news. that's right. cnn. there was that tragic plane crash in nigeria at the exact same time with those terrible
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casualties. this is where real life intrudes on the fairy tale, probably where cnn cuts away and we'll get bits and pieces of taped recast. cnn goes wall to wall on the terrible tragedy. >> sadly the fly-by has been canceled. due to the awful conditions, the royal navy has just confirmed to us that there will be nofully-by which is very, very sad. >> jon: yes. it was one of the two very sad airplane stories of the day. you hate to be the guy whose job it is to cancel thefully-by though. due to weather conditions, your majesty, we had to cancel the... so no big fly-by. you always have the fireworks.
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>> jon: i'm sorry. firework. for more on the queen's jubilee celebration we turn to our correspondent in london. john oliver, nice to see you. oh, my gosh. it seems like there's a lot of enthusiasm for this. what's the mood like over there? >> (crying ) did you see the boat, jon? >> jon: i did. calm down, john. >> did you see the one boat turn around? did you see that? >> jon: just breathe, john. just breathe. >> i'm so sorry. i'm good. jon, it's the queen and the boats and the beautiful weather and the boats again and the queen on the boat. and the boat and the queen. >> jon: it actually looks like it's raining, john.
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>> no, it's not raining here, jon. it's beautiful. it's a sunny day. >> jon: really, because you look soaking wet? >> no, probably just excitement sweat. from the boats and the queen on the boat and the turn. >> jon: no negatives. there's no negatives from the event at all? even in a time of austerity in great britain. >> jon, obviously it's impossible to look at what's happening here and not think about what it represents. the sad last gasp of a once powerful empire. its best days long behind it desperately trying to conjure up a happier time when it was something more than a decaying relic. >> jon: obviously a pretty harsh thing to say about your own homeland. >> no, i was talking about cnn. jon: i didn't realize that. they say the sun never sets on cnn's mighty news empire. remember, this is the
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organization that covered the first gulf war. now look what they've been reduced to. a butler spending two hours talking about barges. look upon your work, ted turner, and despair. >> jon: i'm sorry to interrupt. it appears the rain is increasing, john. >> no, no, no. it really isn't. you know the camera adds ten pounds. this is just a light drizzle, jon. >> jon: i understand that. john, it appears to be raining baked beans. that's terrible. >> (mumbling ). jon: i understand. wait, is that...
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>> (mumbling ) don't worry about it. >> jon: shouldn't they just cancel the parade? if the weather is going to be this bad again, just cancel it? >> no, we do not cancel it, jon. this is england. we don't back down, not from nazis, not from rain, not from toast and especially not from [bleep]. god save the queen. god save the queen.
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>> jon: welcome back. last friday was a very exciting day. saw the release of the usa's monthly employment report, a! k a, the obama campaign's... how did that go? >> only 69,000 jobs were added to america's work force last month. the dow jones industrials closing down about 270 points. >> the news hit the stock market like a punch to the gut. >> nowhere to hide on this one. a political stomach punch. >> and a body blow to confidence in the american economy. >> jon: a fiscal kick in the
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balls. economic indicator of kicked balls. a downturn in everything but the amount of pain of america's recently kicked balls. bad news, crappy news. you know what this means. time for the obama administration to play another round of america's most fraying resident game show. hey, everybody. you know the rules. the obama team must find the best ways to spin this turd into something positive. top seven answers on the board. let's play the turd. >> the good news is we have 27 months straight of job growth. >> jon: nice. even though job growth failed to keep up with population growth, there were again technically more jobs last month than the previous month. one of the greatest purveyors of these sorts of game shows. we're looking for true but still [bleep] >> the survey says.
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jon: the number three answer. true but still [bleep]. there are two shinier ways to polish this turd up. who is next? >> the national numbers are not as good as any of us would like. this will not be decided in california or new york or illinois. it will be decided in florida, virginia, ohio, iowa and in states that really have seen an uptick in manufacturing jobs in particular. i think there's a positive outlook for the president. >> jon: i see. less of a turd policy and more of a [bleep], unless you live in a swing state. richard. >> the survey says... jon: oh, the number 4 answer. number one answer still on the board. next contestant. how would you like to polish that turd. >> in the ass? (buzzer ). >> jon: i think that's the wrong answer and the wrong game show. but bad economy. polish that turd.
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>> have any conversation in all of this debate about the two wars president bush funded and put them on the credit card. what was striking about what happened on friday was how quick the leaders of congress were out there wringing their hands. these are the architects of obstruction. >> let me tell you the story about massachusetts under governor romney. it did fall to 47th out of 50 in job creation. >> jon: interesting strategy. our turd stinks but everybody else sucks worse. >> survey says... (bell ringing ). >> jon: just one more answer to give. is there any sort of nonpartisan turd-polishing in play here? >> we did have a very warm winter. >> jon: where did that answer come from? let me guess. >> in the ass? jon: you're not even trying. i'm afraid that's all the time we have. no one ever said obama wouldn't
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be a one-term president if he didn't fix the entire economy in three years. >> a year from now i think people are going to see we're starting to make some progress but there still will be pain out there. if i don't have this done in three years, then this will be a one-term proposition. >> jon: never end a sentence on the proposition. that's all the time we have for... >> polish that turd. jon: we'll be right cq
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lcome back. my guest tonight they've been political rivals for more than 40 years. their new book is called it's even worse than it looks. please welcome to the program thomas mann and norman ornstein. hello. ( applause ) >> jon: you know, our audience loves their think-tankers. you two represent... this is remarkable. you work with the brookings institute, yes? >> that's correct jon: you work with the american enterprise institute. these are the hatfields and mccoys of think tanks. yet look at this. look.
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look what's happening here. i don't know what's going on under the table but look at this. a book. how did you two, you know, you're both very well respecked observers of the political scene. how did you two start working together? >> we actually started a graduate school together at the university of michigan 45 years ago. we came to washington. we worked on the hill for a year as fellows. basically formed a partnership that we've been doing now for more than 40 years. writing and doing projects. >> jon: this is a follow-up to your previous best seller about congress and how it... again i'm pair phrasing with my political analyst socks. why do you feel like congressional dysfunction is not the typical congressional function that we have become accustomed to and accept in our daily lives? >> it's gotten much worse. it's not just the congress.
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it's the whole american political system. we have incentives now for a political party -- in this case the republican opposition party -- to do whatever it can to destroy the president, to keep him from successfully passing legislation that might have proved to his benefit because their only route to power is that defeat. therefore holding the country's debt ceiling hostage, denying they were supporting the health care plan a couple years ago, that they now call socialism, anything is okay if it works to achieve that end. >> jon: you were with the aei. they are associated with the folks that he's talking about. do you still have a desk there?
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>> i haven't been back in three days, but, yes. i'm a bit of an outlier in a lot of ways but nobody has told me you can't do that, you can't say that. that's been true throughout our partnership where i have often said some things that i'm sure caused some of my colleagues to wince >> jon: what you brought up though, isn't that the role of the opposition party and hasn't it always been that way? we are the opposition party. the things that you would like to do, we would put obstacles in front of and keep you from doing. why is this time so different from when the democrats were the opposition party and they were saying things about the bush administration? >> because the opposition party this time is prepared to go all out to act like a parliamentary party really and ostentatious unrelenting opposition using the tools of the filibuster to deny the majority a chance to get that program passed. we don't have a parliamentary system >> jon: this is... these are the
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same tactics and the same things that have been done since the system began but they are being done now with a higher volume? is that it? >> a higher volume and in a different way >> it's not like democrats have been angels in this process. you can go back to the bush administration when he wanted to do something on social security. they stomped on his neck. if you look also at the beginning of the bush administration, democrats worked with him and, you know, at the worst possible time after that horrible 2000 election basically gave him legitimacy by supporting the no child left behind bill. democratic votes gave him the tax cuts for better or worse. they worked to solve problems in a lot of places even as we had partisanship. now the problem solvers are gone. it's far more true on the republican side. there are some of them there but they don't vote that way. that's the difference >> jon: why shouldn't they do that though because if i understand the platform correctly, the republican platform is government cannot be helpful in solving problems so
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watch as i demonstrate. isn't that... aren't they doing what they are... what they have been elected to do. they've been elected to go to washington and dismantle it. and the method that they are doing it is through this obstructionism or... >> you're right. but who is held accountable for the results? it's not the republicans in the minority in congress or even controlling the majority in the house. it's the president. so they call back at him, your program has been entirely unsuccessful. let me take it to another level because in a way what you just said is like polishing that turd. >> jon: may i say something? you see that phrase come out of a learned man's mouth, in some ways i consider myself just having gone through a doctoral program. go ahead. polish that turd
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>> you may want to dismantle government. they're saying, you know, if be cooperate with them it only gets bigger. there's something to that. you don't have a program that is going to reduce deficits by cutting taxes and yet still supporting fundamentally much of government. if you bring the u.s. credit rating down because you, for the first time, hold the debt ceiling hostage to a set of nonnegotiable demands, that's not doing, i think, what their constituents want or what they're elected to do. it's a different phenomenon than we've seen before. you can be conservative and yet still work to solve problem >> jon: we're going to come back and talk about the possibility is maybe both sides have gotten too much of what they want as part of this. it's even worse than it looks on the book shelves now. thomas mann and norman ornstein. we'll be righ
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