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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  April 3, 2014 9:00am-9:31am PDT

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from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. ["daily show" theme song playing] [cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome to "the daily show". what a show tonight. my name is jon stewart. our guest tonight one of our favorites samuel l. jackson. we're excited to have him back on the program. this is fun. but i want to jump right in.
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you may recall, you probably won't, we didn't. december 2013, general motors one of america's oldest most often bankrupted auto makers made an historic move. >> they named a woman as its next ceo. her name is mary barra. >> we have a new ceo who happens to be a woman, a car gal. >> jon: a car gal, an auto dame, a jel loppy broad. [ laughter ] never has an outgoing ceo promoted change while so perfectly demonstratinging so much further they industrial to go. -- have to go but for this horseless carriaged tomato, its looked like nothing but open road. >> we have a warning for you tonight. gm is recalling nearly 780,000 older model compact cars. the cars in question chevrolet
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cobalt and pontiac g5's. >> jon: it's a speed bump a recall. happens all the time. what are are we talking about overdpliewd decals? vanity light bulb brightness issue? objects in mirror are the actual distance away that they appear to be? what have you got? >> gm admitted the ignition switch on more that two dozen vehicles may move to the off or accessory position shutting off the engine, disablinging power steering, power brakes, the seatbelts and the airbags. [laughter] >> jon: oh, or that. i guess. or for no reason your car may perhaps form to an uncontrollable 2500 power dead metallic blue cannon ball, satellite radio omtional. they learned the problem and immediately moved for a recall.
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system worked. >> gm first noticed the problem in 2001. >> jon: right 2001. they noticed the problem in 2001 but you have to approach these things with caution. you have to figure out exactly what the problem is. >> it's what is called a detent plunger. this tiny part in the recalled vehicles was too short and could slip makinging it possible for the ignition to shift while driving. >> jon: save the plunger, save the world. [laughter] >> in mamp 2005, a -- a gm report said fixes would take too long and cost too much. quote" none of the solutions represents an eapable business case." >> jon: they found out in 2001, studied it for four years, did an internal cost benefit analysis using ratio equations and came up with (bleep). [ laughter ]
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cost too much. out of curiosity, though let me ask you a question. how much did it cost? >> the cost to replacement, the part would have been 57 cents. >> jon: well, hold on. when you add it up -- it's still a tiny amount of money actually. for god sakes even if you are strapped for cash, gm you could have found at least that much in the seats of cars you are fixing. the thing would have paid for itself but all right. you decided it cost too much and it's not like the consequences of inaction would -- what are the consequences of insnaks. >> gm says it knows of 13 deaths and 32 crashes connected to a faulty ignition switches and airbags that then failed to deploism consumer advocates say there may be many more. >> jon: mother (bleep).
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[ laughter ] and instead of fixinging the problem, what -- fixing the problem what is the solution you offered customers? >> gm sent out a service bulletin to dealerships warning drivers not to use heavy keychains. [ laughter ] >> jon: right, no, why fix a problem you created when you could just ask your surviving customers -- [laughter] -- to get rid of all their other keys. hey, here is your problem here, with the -- here is the problem with the car here, you have a house. [laughter] you sell that and any other locked devices and your car should run no problem. [ laughter ] gm has known for over a decade about a deadly design flaw, waited years to attempt to fix it. botched the fix. threatened to recoop legal costs
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from anybody who tried to litigate the issue and when the (bleep) hit the fan decided maybe it's time to promote car gal and so mary barra took over gm and was soon there after meaninging yesterday offered an all expense paid trip to washington's romantic house hearing room. >> this ignition switch issue was first -- came to light in 2006, is that correct? >> it came to light to me on january 31, 2013. >> jon: holy (bleep). they hired her and then told her during her orientation. [laughter] welcome ms. barra you've love this place. if you are going to leave anything in the brake room -- break room fridge write your name on it. that's it. oh, we're responsible for the easily avoidable deaths of 13 people. and the ladies room is down the
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hall. okay. how did ceo barra handle it? >> as soon as i learned without the problem we acted without hesitation. we'll not shirk from our responsibilities now or in the future. today's gm will do the right thing. >> jon: today's gm is not a shirker. [ laughter ] and in fact, they hired a lawyer that specializes in cases where victims are compensated so they probably have a great plan to make this right. >> are you saying that the hiring of mr. feinberg indicates that gm will give some kind of settlement? >> it will take probably 30-60 days to evaluate the situation. we've not made any decisions. we've just started this process with mr. feinberg. >> and that might include people who have been injured as well. >> we've not made any decisions. >> jon: we don't know what he will say. maybe our lawyer will recommend
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we dangle money in front of people and not give them anymore or maybe the families owe us money. we have to wait and see. this is up to now the pleasant cruise of a story encounters a problem and careens into a ditch. why would gm have the ability to in any way wait and see how they feel about settling the cases with the clearly wronged families? how are they not auto matticly liable for damages? >> under the terms of the emergence from federal bankruptcy protection in 2009 the new gm is not liable for claims that happened before july of that year. >> jon: and once again we learned that not only corporations are people they have some sort of weird mutant power that allows them to dodge the consequences of their action. because gm declared bankruptcy they are no longer legally liable for human deaths that they caused through their admitted negligence. i cannot wait for a noncorporate
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person to try that (bleep). no, no, your honor, my name is not jeffrey dahmer. he declared moral bankruptcy a few years back. while i deeply regret the old jeffrey dahmer's actions. and i, joff damer am not on the hook for the admitted eatinging of some of my neighbors. i'm going to head out, get in of some of my neighbors. i'm going to head out, get in the car and drive
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that's a little better, right? now, see i love this neighborhood. trulia says the schools are excellent. i like it. must see. well, that was a bust. mnh. it's three bedrooms. i found a great new listing. little busy here. nice. uh huh. this one's open right now. let's check it out. it's the agent. they accepted. shut up!
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we're getting a new house! what? they accepted...owww. [ male announcer ] that moment when it all comes together. that's your moment of trulia. download the free trulia app today.
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you stand behind what you say. there's a saying around here, around here you don't make excuses. you make commitments. and when you can't live up to them, you own up, and make it right. some people think the kind of accountability that thrives on so many streets in this country has gone missing in the places where it's needed most. but i know you'll still find it when you know where to look.
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>> jon: welcome back. [cheers and applause] money -- money it's something that is wealthy people like very much to hide it's getting harder and harder to find on overseas bank to look the other way. john hodgman shares his amazing journey. >> thank you, jonment the wealthy are the most persecuted are not in the world. we've been forced from our homes. well, we kept our homes but our money has been forced in exile hounded from one tax shelter to the next. for years we relied upon the cayman islands to give our money a better life but recently the department of justice has cracked down on the banking haven to i went to miami gateway to the world of international
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asset protection. you'll never find a better place for cuban sandwiches. i met with david aboard the ayn rand themed yacht. where could i go to get the old fashioned cayman islands treatment? >> if you are looking for an off shore jurisdiction where to be perfectly frank you can do whatever you want to do -- thank is the point of wealth. >> i would suggest the cook islands. >> hypothetically let's say i have a business that allows other millionaires to shoot panda bears remotely via skype. >> i think the cook islands probably would accommodate you. >> i like the sound of this. >> there's a reason why the cook islands is known as the crook islands. >> [evil laugh] why aren't you laughing ma high inicly like me? >> we have different morals
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let's just say that. >> fantastic a master of sheltering money in the cook islands howard rosen unleashes a sales pitch that spoke to the recklessly rich. >> i think we use seatbelts in cars to protect ourselves. why shouldn't we be able to protect our financial resources. >> the cook islands is just a seatbelt to your money doesn't bump it head. >> sure. >> let's say i want to put money in a trust for my current wife and keep my other dumb wives. >> this is used as post marital planning and premarital planninging. >> i'm constantly in a state of preand post marriage thank this is probably for you. >> how is this legal? >> no court in the united states has jurisdiction over the cook islands trust. >> i don't care if it's legal or not. thank you though. >> okay. >> rosen explains that the cook's unique legal system is so protective of american wealth
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because of an age-old island tradition of having their banking laws written by american lawyers, lawyers like this guy. >> our firm has had some input in recent limited liability company legislation enacted in the cook islands. >> is it wrong for the rich to simply play by the system that they've been handed and which they wrote themselves? >> i is say that people are entitled to protect themselves. >> right if people are going to sue me every time i botch a home surgery or commit some fraud, i have no choice. >> absolutely. >> that's even a better reason to set up a cook islands asset protection trust. >> i think i got a money boner. >> typically we'll say if someone has more than $500,000 it might be something for them to consider. >> i have $500,000 right here. >> first of all we don't deal in cash. would you have to legally deposit that.
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[laughter] >> it will be good for you. >> we prefer a check or wire transfer. >> sure once the cameras come out everyone gets respectable. i retreated to the beach v.i.p. section to ponder where to hide my riches from the gross hands of the taking class. >> wait a minute. >> i had it i didn't another either of those two dumb islands. attention millionaires tired of hiding your blood money on islands that recognize u.s. law? tired of paying out big judgments to the workers in the asbestos plant that just happen to be children? and what about the tedious jail time. there's got be a better way. and there is i'm john hodgman are you banking in the cayman islander cook? sure they say they turn a blind eye but on the hodge island we have blind our bank workers with nondisclosure islands and
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bleach. we'll send you pictures of roads and schools you are not funding. it doesn't matter what your business is from the under ground ivory dildo trades. the hodge islands are not actually islands they are shipping palettes floating in a canal. do not consult your financial canal. do not consult your financial's the new flatizza... from subway. that's from subway? what's a flatizza? it's melty cheese and marinara... on super crispy flatbread. tom, i'm patching you in. and over here ... introducing the bio duplicator! great to see you guys. did i just blow your mind? flatizza! the latest invention from subway, the new flatizza. crispy flatbread loaded with mozzarella and made the way you say. now get two for $5. subway eat fresh. directions to the nearest subway.
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[cheers and applause] >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight an actor. his new film is called captain america the winter soldier: >> warninging approaching intersection. >> get me off the grid. >> jon: we've been there. please welcome back to the program samuel l. jackson.
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[cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] >> look at this. wow. [cheers and applause] >> jon: enjoy. soak it in. soak it in. [cheers and applause] >> baby, it's all about that, right? >> jon: this say continuing saga of the bad assery of samuel jackson. [laughter] >> thank you. >> jon: more, more and more. these films, these characters have been around for 50 years, 60 years. >> nick if you arey was around -- furry was around when -- fury was around when i was a kid. he became david hassle hoff for a while and then me. the evolution of nick fury continues. >> jon: it does indeed and may i say it's been upgraded. >> thank you. i like to feel that way, too.
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>> jon: they were never able, the technology of movies was never at the advanced level that it is now that the super heros could on screen really appear realistic and it could -- you could get the jolt. i wonder if that's why it's only now this these movies are so big. >> i think part of it is the technology and part of is the accessibility of what we're able to do as real people now. when i was a kid i would read a comic book and want to be in a world where there were women walking around with green hair and blue hair and wearing boots. >> jon: they call that san francisco. >> exactly and now we have that and people are walking around talking on things and looking at stuff on the devices. so it's all very real for us. the only thing is this cat that actually flies. >> jon: yes. >> and lands somewhere. he's probably out there somewhere just waiting to come out. >> jon: i believe that's
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right. i wonder. i've always thought that science takes its cues from all of the great fiction writers and science fiction writers and they see something like that and go i bet i can make that. they are taking their cues from the imaginations of a guy like stan lee. >> there's that and there's also the fact that -- i used to dream i could fly. i used to dream i could breathe under water and all that kind of stuff. i the wanted to do it really badly. now i put on that costume and i fall into that marvel playground and i'm like i'm in heaven. this is happening. i put my eye patch on and i walk out there and i'm invincible, man. >> jon: they create it realistically. in the old days like hulk they find the biggest guy they could and paint him green and that would be -- >> yeah. >> jon: but the effects now and everything else that surrounds it. is it -- when you are doing it,
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when you are making it is it tedious? is it -- do you feel excite or you in spandex in front of a green flat and they are like now the monster is coming? >> in the beginning you sort of felt that way. in the beginning when i first started doing star wars there was a green room and i had a light saber and george would say there's a thing attacking you. i would say how big is it? he would say as big as an s.u.v.? i go, really. i said how fast is it? he said fast as you want it to be? i can do anything i want and you'll draw stuff around me? he said draw all the stuff -- you kick all the ass you want and we'll -- i'm runninging and
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jumping and then all of a sudden when i go to the movie it's like (bleep). look at me. >> jon: amazing. >> jon: yeah, yeah. >> it's all that and more but when you are doing (bleep) like that car chase. >> jon: yeah. >> we had like -- >> jon: that looks actually dangerous. >> we had like 12 cars that all did different (bleep). when you see the movie there's one point where it's like 19 guys firing bullets at it. the windows are just resifting the bullets. i'm sitting in the -- resisting the bullets. it's a dope ass feeling like yeah mother (bleep). we were shooting in cleveland. we're on the streets of cleveland. there's people in the office builds like (bleep). [ laughter ] >> jon: i'm excited. they have made -- i'm telling you marvel studios they've made these movies so well and they are doinging tremendous stuff with this. i've been lovinging this.
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>> like i told you back stage this one has a story, a plot. >> jon: that doesn't often happen. >> it's more than bad guys punching good guys. it's a big ass mystery going on in here. and i still haven't figured out how they got robert redford to do this movie. it's like robert redford is in this movie. >> jon: are you tempted at any point to move your eye patch to the other side? >> no, because my scar is over here. it's like yeah. >> jon: captain america: winter soldier. theaters on friday. winter soldier. theaters on friday. samuel l.
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>> jon: that's our show. here it is your moment of zen. >> i don't care what you do from day to day just do it on this show. >> what do you call a camel captioning sponsored by comedy central


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