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tv   The Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore  Comedy Central  July 23, 2016 2:07am-2:38am PDT

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my good buys. goodbye t-shirts only republicans can afford. goodbye karl rove, goodbye token minorities, goodbye hypocritical gun policy, goodbye walking contradictions, goodbye, america, i'll miss you. (applause) >> trevor: hasan minhaj, everybody. we'll be right back. ♪ my brother and i have always been rivals. we would dream about racing each other, in monaco. ♪ we were born brothers. competition made us friends.
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(cheers and applause) >> trevor: thank you so much! thank you so much! that is our final show out of cleveland ohio, and to the people of cleveland, thank you so much! (cheers and applause) from our friends down at phoenix coffee to great lakes brewery
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the people at mitchell's ice cream, i just want to thank you for hosting us and the beginning of the end of the world. you know what? this is so tough for me because next week, i've decided i'm going to take my talents to philadelphia and -- and join the democratic national convention. but don't worry, i'll probably be back in a few years! so thank you so much for tuning in! now here it is... your moment of zen. ♪ all right now ♪ ♪ baby, it's all right now ♪
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s and applause] >> larry: thank you, thank you. welcome to the nightly show. >> audience: larry! larry: thank you. they're so excited it's friday. you ain't on on fridays. i'm glad you came here. [laughing] >> larry: they -- no it's friday, man.
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we have a special. we have a musical performance from y-g tonight. [cheers and applause] >> larry: he has -- he is giving donald trump some feedback. [laughing] >> larry: on how his convention went. first, let's bring you up on the rnc last night and check in with the unblack ening. (screams) [cheers and applause] >> larry: so last night marked the end of the republican national convention. it's been quite a convention, you guys. from michelle obama's beautiful speech. [laughing] >> larry: to -- [cheers and applause]
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>> larry: to ben carson playing six degrees of lucifer. >> larry: to grander ma munster sew yack killer getting booed off the stage. the children of the orange stealing the spot light. they were awesome. a hell of a week. i mean that, it has been the week from hell. donald trump your big night to make a case to the american people. what did you have to say. >> the american people will come first once again. >> larry: oh. the american first will come first. isn't that jumping in -- [ applause ] >> larry: you know what i'm saying. >> larry: how are you going to do that big boss?
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okay. i see. he's not just appealing to the base. he's also working the shaft. what what. he had that. right there. i got this, this is a sick crowd tonight. alright. that's not the only way trump is turning america around. >> everyone who endorses hatred or oppression is not welcome in our country and never ever will be. >> larry: what you're kicking yourself out. [cheers and applause] >> larry: trump. trump. no, no. [laughing] >> larry: trump spent most of the nighing to terrify people into voting for him. he tried to extend a hand to a
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community that has received fanger from the republicans before. >> as your president i will do everything in my power to protect our lbgbtq citizens. [laughing] >> larry: he could barely get through the letters right. lgb -- it's t. sounds like he just heard it for the first time. can you spell that for me. [laughing] >> larry: i have to be fare and give trump credit for mentioning lgbtq citizens. and i give the party credit for this week. >> donald trump knows your life matters, lgbtq lives matter. >> i am proud to be gay. i am proud to be a republican. most of all i'm proud to be an american. [cheers and applause]
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>> larry: and i am so confused right now. the entire republican party, did they just come out of the closet? what. i don't know. [ applause ] >> larry: hold on though. even jesus' bff ted cruz got in on the action. >> whether you're bill or straight the bill of rights protects the rights of all of us to live according to our conscience. >> larry: man, the republican party has embraced lgbtq rights. it's a shame they don't like lgbtq rights. [ applause ] >> larry: ted cruz very nice. you also said this about the supreme court's pro gay marriage ruling. >> june last year we saw a decision from the supreme court
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nothing short of tragic. >> larry: damn video tapes. first black people getting shot and now hypocrisy. and donald trump, donald trup trump, nice you want to protect the lgbtq people. then you have a running mate who is anything but that. supporting a constitutional ban on same-sex marriage and working to jail same-sex couples. and conversion therapy. you think a guy's name so close to penis you wouldn't be afraid of it. would you think. that am i right, trump? >> larry: i think that was extra. sorry, republicans trying to keep it a hundred.
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a lot of people don't know this. the trump campaign granted the nightly show exclusive back stage access. [laughing] >> larry: i might be making it up. i might be making up. back stage access to donald trump and the moments leading up to his big speech. we captured compelling and intimate moments. take a look. >> the situation is a real mess. we all know it was -- look we have to restore order, okay. you have to monitor the situation. we have to get, real tough unbelievably tough. look, i have to go. >> alright. >> what the hell happened? problems, all of the problems, so many problems in our country, folks. believe me.
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problems, problems. obama. obama. black, black, black, obama. >> mr. trump, look who is here. >> hey. >> brian james. you were fantastic against the warriors. my god, you were good. >> i -- >> what are you doing? good, what are you doing later on tonight? i love that outfit. >> mr. trump, five minutes. look i have to go ivanka. behind me i heard him saying i have the wrong coat. now two of us. i realize. the look over who do you think i saw, everybody?
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mamilania's whose coat was it? >> oh that accent cuts through me like a knife. regis. okay. crazy, unbelievable. right. that is the perfect story. unbelievable. most people don't want to hear it, it's the perfect story. guys, guys, i just found a pick pikachu. look, my remarks about the disabled were taken out of context, okay. geez. geez. i can't believe the crap that these trump protesters pulled on the convention floor. look i win every primary. i did fantastically well. that means party hats for the nomination. by the way the guy from alaska
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the delegate, he's an asshole. >> i was raised in a small town in southern indiana. big family and kay corn field in the back room. [laughing] >> execute me excuse me. i didn't say all of them were rapists. i said most of them. >> present to you and all of america my father -- >> i can't do it. i can't do it. it was just for fun. let me out. it was just for fun. i don't care. [ applause ] >> larry: unbelievable. we will be right back. [cheers and applause]
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♪ adios, muchacho. [spraying & sniffing] [whip crack] [grumbling] [groaning] and that's how the deodorant commercial ended. [old spice whistle] (guy) oh man, the show's pretty much over. (friend) wish we could start it from the beginning. (jon bon jovi) with directv, you can. you see, we've got the power to turn back time let's start over, let's rewind
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[cheers and applause] >> larry: welcome back. i'm here with my panel. first up nightly show contributor riki velez and nightly show contributor franchesca ramsey and former ohio state senator, nina turner. join us on twitter using the hashtag "tonightly" last night the mighty orange one gave his speech to the convention. >> i know that corruption has reached a level like never ever before in our country. nobody knows the system better than me. which is why i alone can fix it. >> larry: mike pence is like he's so full of [beep]. [ applause ] >> larry: i think pence really
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thinks that. what was everyone's impression of mussolini's speech. >> i don't think he wants to run in may. he's doing it by himself. i and i alone can get this done. the beautiful thing is was my hometown cleveland ohio. the republicans wanted to date us. democrats didn't. they should of picked cleveland ohio for the convention. >> larry: where is ohio, leaning towards trump? >> they're in a dead heat. >> i don't know -- >> he's trying to make america great again. >> larry: i forgot. what did you think of his speech. >> this is the most i have been exposed to gop rhetoric. it was four days, a lot. by this time it's all blended together. i got to the speech i heard usa usa. i'm like, make it stop.
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i didn't like it. it was -- i thought it was way too long. >> larry: like three hours? >> 75 minutes, man. larry: 75 minutes. >> i hated the whole speech. i hated it. he talked about he's from queens. i'm from queens. [cheers and applause] >> larry: you're not from the same part of queens? >> no aoebgz from jamaica estates. i'm from queens. those are two different places. he has never road the train to 179 street. [laughing] >> but the 180,000, you know 180,000 illegal immigrants are roaming free. don't mess with me. roaming free. >> larry: like pokemon. >> ya. they're roaming free. that got to me. >> larry: like buffalo. >> that got to me.
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>>. larry: trump said things, 75% of people actually over all reacted positive -- what about three [beep] >> who are these people? >> that's what i want to know. >> exactly. [laughing] >> larry: okay. what do you think it was. there is something there that people are responding to favorably. his tough stance? >> it's hard to figure out. i don't know. i think it's the the a -- >> larry: he's from the [beep] >> the big bang theory. >> i understand a lot of people like [beep] i don't understand. a lot of people like -- >> larry: you understand "big bang theory" is funny. >> i don't. i'm sorry. >> i honestly think it comes down to people being mad.
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people are mad how things are ran right now. >> larry: he is mad for them. >> he comes out mad and people relate to that. that is [beep] scary. >> he's their voice. he said i'm your choice. >> larry: he said. that. >> he means that. there are the disenfranchised. >> larry: why are people so mad. >> they're not making mad. you would be mad if you weren't making money. you wouldn't be pleased. no people are suffering in this country. he's tapping into that frustration and giving voice that that frustration. listen he didn't put the sleeper move on folks. he beat out sixteen other folks. >>. larry: trump has a voice to it but no words. it's like saying -- [ applause ] >> i don't understand that. it's like look i may see a cave man is angry i don't want him. ya, cave man.
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ya. >> he would be worst to be playing scrabble with. >> larry: i know you're a big bernie supporter, right. >> yes. [cheers and applause] >> larry: trump said that bernie supporters will follow him. some have said it too. what is up with that? >> i don't know. that is saying a lot. we are not flocking over there. some folks may -- >> larry: any kind of migration i'm worried about. >> what mr. trump represents is the opposite of what bernie sanders fought for. i doubt there will be a flocking. democrats can't take it for granite. >> it's trump saying it. trump said he was a billionaire too. >> believe me [beep] >> ya, that wasn't true either. larry: that's blue collar billing. get the [beep] out of here. [beep]. [cheers and applause] >> ya.
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larry: my father is a puerto rican that does carpets every day. that's a blue collar day. this is blue [beep]. we will be right back. [cheers and applause] >> if you live in new york city get tickets to the nightly sho if i hired you what is your plan? i see a few things changing. less mergers and acquisitions, more charitable donations. retiring on top. linda?! letting boredom get the best of me. and then returning triumphantly. smells like we're done here. [old spice anthem]
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♪ my brother and i have always been rivals. we would dream about racing each other, in monaco. ♪ we were born brothers. competition made us friends. wish bold in the 2017 camry. toyota. let's go places. we didn't just break the mold. we made it. and we spelled it l-i-t-e. because when you invent light beer, you get to spell it however you want. spelled different because it's brewed different. t-mobile never stops improving. and we doubled our lte coverage. that's right! our coverage stacks up with anybody, including verizon and at&t. and only t-mobile gives you more than just great coverage. now you can stream
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[cheers and applause] >> larry: welcome back. tonight i'm excited to have a performance from rapper y-g. the tv friendly version of his hit song [beep] donald trump. off his new album "still brazy" welcome y-g featuring nipsey hustle. no donald trump no donald trump yeah, yeah no donald trump yeah, yeah no donald trump yeah no donald trump yeah no donald trump yeah, yeah no donald trump yeah, yeah no donald trump, yeah i like white folks, but i don't like you all the dudes in the hood wanna fight you surprised the nation of islam ain't tried to find you have a rally out in l.a. you know wassup home of the rodney king riot, we don't give a (ugh)
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black students, ejected from your rally, what? i'm ready to go right now, your racist ass did too much i'm 'bout to turn black panther don't let donald trump win, that dude is cancer he too rich, he ain't got the answers he can't make decisions for this country, he gon' crash us no, we can't be a slave for him he got me appreciatin' obama way more hey donald, and everyone that follows you gave us your reason to be president, but we hate yours no donald trump no donald trump yeah, yea no donald trump no donald trump yeah no donald trump no donald trump yeah no donald trump no donald trump yeah, yea am i trippin'? let me know i thought all that donald trump bull-- was a joke know what they say when rich dudes go broke.. look, reagan sold coke, obama
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sold hope donald trump spent his trust fund money on the vote i'm from a place where you prolly can't go speakin' for some people that you prolly ain't know it's pressure built up and it's prolly gon' blow and if we say go then they're prolly gon' go you vote trump then you're prolly on dope and if you like me then you prolly ain't know and if you been to jail you can prolly still vote we let this clown win, we gon' prolly feel broke you built walls? we gon' prolly dig holes and if your ass do win.ù yea yeah! no donald trump no donald trump yeah, yea, no donald trump yeah, yeah, no donald trump yeah, no donald trump yeah, no donald trump yeah, yea, no donald trump yeah, yeah, no donald trump, yeah, yeah, no donald trump, yeah we the youth we the people of tomorrow of this country we got a voice too we will be seen we will be heard! hold up, i mess with mexicans, got a plug with mexicans want a little, need a switch wh

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