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tv   The Daily Show  Comedy Central  June 21, 2017 1:40am-2:11am PDT

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- ♪ and take control ♪ burnin' down hot topic ♪ ♪ burnin' down hot topic - mom, dad! - what? - goth kids burnt down the hot topic and sure enough, soon as they did,h, i tried eating a hot dog, and it tasted good!tasted my vampire teeth even fell out when i bit into it!lt i'm human again!human a - we have no idea what you're talking about, butters, but we're glad you're home!but we' - that's right, son. there's only one thing i care about-- - what's that, dad? - well, would you mind telling me why there's rice-a-roni in my coffee?ice-a-ro - butters, you are grounded! a- aw, dang it! - it worked, linda. our son is groundable once more. is - fellow students, over the past week, there's been a lot of confusion, and so we have asked for this assemblyis asse to clarify the difference between goth kidse diffe
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let us make it abundantly clear:et us if you hate life, truly hate the sun,f you ha and need to smoke and drink coffeend dnk you are goth. if, however, you like dressing in black 'cause it's fun, fun, enjoy putting sparkles on your cheeks and following the occulttheu while avoiding things that are bad for your health, then you are most likelyyou a douche bag vampire-wannabe boner.e- because anybody who thinks they are actually a vampirehey is freaking fi [cheers and applause] app [cheers and applause] come >> from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with trevor noah. ( cheers and applause ) ♪
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>> trevor: welcome to "the daily show"! thank you so much for tuning in! i'm trevor noah! our guest tonight the co-founder and editor-in-chief of politico, upjohn harris is here, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: but we begin tonight in south america. >> authorities in argentina say they have uncovered the largest stash of nazi artifacts in the country's history. police found the artifacts during the a raise in a house in againos ares, 75 items found including a magnifying glass historians say belonged to adolph hitler. >> authorities are trying to find out how it got to argentina in the first place. >> trevor: 75 pieces hidden for decades, a huge drove, the largest collection of nazi memorabilia outside of steve bannon's man cave, which is huge, huge. pretty messed up. that is so messed up that when the police raided the house the guy went to his neighbors, like, hey!
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nothing to worry about there, just found some kiddie porn, nothing else. ha ha, life, right? ( laughter ) it's hard to play off 75 artifacts. one can be a mistake but 75 is a collection. you can't play that off. you can't be, like, where did i find all this nazi stuff in i got them in a box of gues gist , huh? seems like members of the house embarrass themselves every day. senate republicans only try tome bars themselves behind closed doors. a trick the democrats noticed. >> new controversy over the republicans push to overall healthcare with g.o.p. lawmakers crafting it in secret. democrats stained an overnight protest on capitol hill. >> the dramatic talk is on the senate floor, threatening to delay all business unless republicans open up talks to the
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public. >> they're ashamed of it. >> it's an insult to history and the traditions of this body. >> so i say to this republican leadership, what are you afraid of? bring that bill out! >> trevor: bernie! ( cheers and applause ) bernie! ahhh! bernie! ( applause ) i miss his passion! he's so passionate about everything. bring that bill out! he probably says that in restaurants all the time -- bring that bill out! stop being a coward and bring out that bill! ( laughter ) that's what happened yesterday. democratic senators took over the floor to denounce the republicans' healthcare bill instead of what they usually do at night which is dreaming a super ripped barack obama has brought them trump's tax returns. totally different evening for them. the democrats are right to be upset. this is legislation that will affect tens of millions of lives. republican lawmakers are writing it in total secret. there have been no hearings, no
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debates, nobody knows almost anything about it and this is about national healthcare and yet the republicans are treating the same way a high schooler streets jacking off in his room, like america's banging away on the door going, hey, what are you doing in there? nothing! nothing! nothing! are you doing what i think you're doing? no! i'm not ashamed at all! don't come in! don't come in! med- i-kade... ( laughter ) what are you doing in there? thetimes have very few cards to play. the only thing they can do is take a page out of the republicans book. a year ago when they had to drum up opposition to obamacare, the republicans got really creative with the truth. >> the democratic plan for healthcare reform amounts to a government takeover of healthcare in this country. >> it's going to give free health insurance to illegal aliens. >> it's going to end up rationing healthcare.
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>> over 30% of american physicians would leave the profession. >> uses our tax money to allow people to kill themselves. >> tell you how you will die. >> they will die in line. >> put to death by their government. >> one in five people have to die because they went to socialized medicine. >> we should not have a government program that determines you're going to pull the plug on grandma. >> trevor: that's right! that's not the government's business. we should be able to pull the plug on grandma when we're finally ready to let her go -- or, when we really need to charge our phone, whichever one comes first. grandma, i know you're on 3% and i'm on 1. oh... she's gone. ( laughter ) i love you applauded for that -- yeah, death selfie! do you see all that death panel, suicide, scary madeup (bleep)?
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that's what changes people's minds. that's why republicans did it. that's what democrats needed. they needed to bring that to us last night. they tried but it wasn't the same. >> if your house needs repairs, you don't set the house on fire. >> something that a villain in a novel by charles dickens would say. >> this has been called the vampire bill, the republican vampire bill. why? because the writers of it, the secret 13 writers, they're afraid for the bill to see the light of day, and it's called the vampire bill because its general intent is to suck the life out of the healthcare system for struggling families. >> trevor: ooh! no, senator, i know you're trying to scare the people but it's not working. first of all, vampires don't have that reputation anymore. now they're sparkly and cool. people don't want to run from them, they want to (bleep) them. secondly, you have to work on
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your delivery. your style would suck up the camp fire. turns out the call is actually originating -- now, remember, this is land lines -- the call is not coming from outside the house, it's actually, because the bad die, you see, he happens -- it's not scary enough. now, don't get me wrong, the democrats have done a good job of presenting the factual argument against trump care and the numbers back it up, only 17% of americans support trumpcare. 17%. that's horrible even for vegas. those are bad numbers, man. if the numbers are so bad, why do the democrats seem to be having such a hard time bringing a stop to this thing? i argue that if they're going to nail the coffin on this thing, democrats have to add more emotion to the trumpcare numbers. that's how you scare off republicans. you scare them off for good. what makes a great scary story is all the things you don't know, right? republicans have made it easy. the bill's already a secret. all you need is the numbers. a flash light, alternative
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facts, and you've got a horror story on your hands. here, here, i'll show you. i'll show you. chuck, give me scary background and effects -- ah, there we go, yeah. ( scary music ) this is how you should have been on the floor. have you heard the tale of trumpcare?! crafted in a secret ancient house on capitol hill! they said it would throw 23 million people off healthcare and premiums would rise! by, like, 700% or something, like a really big number. the secret republican bill would also make it mandatory for everyone to wear a catheter! oh, but i don't have a urine problem! too bad! open your pee pee hole! ( laughter ) and scariest of all, under trumpcare, every american would have to share one pharmacist -- bill cosby! ahhh! ha ha ha ha ha!
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( applause ) now, uh -- this might just be a tall tale, but until republicans release it, we'll never know. never know, muah-ha ha ha ha ha! we'll be right back! um, i can't have happen what happened last time... (♪) ahem... here's my card. i'm sure you know your profits are down 8%. so, just let me know if you want to change that. ♪ i believe in you! break through!, break through!
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(quiet chatter) (soft gasp) (record scratching) ( ♪ ) (excited chatter) ( ♪ ) various: whoa! (mixed exclamations) ( ♪ ) (cheering) ( ♪ )
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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." let's talk about the the supreme court, the highest court in the
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land, especially now that ruth bader ginsburg started vaping. don't judge. we all deal with trump in our own way. this week the court ruled on a couple of interesting cases. one decision said states cannot completely ban sex offenders from using social media sites like facebook, twitter and linkedin. i get the facebook and twitter part, but linkedin? i'm confused, like a pedophile is using linkedin? hey, kids, not only do i have candy but court ruled on the car everyone's favorite offensive football team. >> remember how the redskins lost the trademark protection because the team's name was deemed to be too offensive to nativity americans? this term the court will take up a similar case involving an asian-american rock band from oregon called the slants who were too denied a trademark because the office thought the name was racially disparaging.
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the outcome will likely determine whether the redskins lose their trademark for good. >> trevor: poor redskins! having the government strip away your identity, who could possibly know what that feels like? oh! we know why the redskins wanted to win, so they wouldn't have to order new hats, but why was an all-asian band so determined to be called the slants that they took it to the supreme court and how did it work out? we sent ronny chieng out the to find out. >> most bands get in trouble for illegal drugs, but not the slants. >> the slants wanted to trademark their band's name but their ask q was denied. >> you heard it right, an illegal battle over a name. >> how did you get started with the name? >> i asked a bunch of friends, non-asians, what they thought all asians had in common and
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they immediately said slanted eyes and i thought the slants could be an interesting band name because it could have all these different meanings. >> does anyone think of it as any other meaning other than the obvious? >> well, we do. i intended to have people to kind of start, like, a nuanced discussion about racial identity. >> yeah, sure. okay. well, the patent trademark office also known as the p.t.o. didn't see it that way. >> the court said we were too asian to use the name. they said anyone can register the slains as long as they're not asian. >> but you are. >> we are asian. >> you're saying that if you were white, you could register the slants? >> yes. they said our race provides the context for being a racial slur. >> so by protecting you guys against racial discrimination, they've actually discriminated against you racially. >> yes. >> how the hell does that make any sense? >> the u.s. patent and trademark office turned them down saying the name is disparaging to
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asians especially when backed by asian imagery. >> this asian rock band is about breaking racial stereotypes -- wait, what are you doing? over here, yo! yo! can you not tell us apart? what the (bleep)? >> after i fired the crew and got a new one i needed to know why the band was exhausting themselves over a name. >> who among us hasn't gone to law school? i left law school so i wouldn't have to deal with this stuff. >> why are you fighting for the right to be racially abused? you can get it free on twitter. >> it's about principle. it's important to fight for the rights of our people. >> the slants aren't even that offensive name. if you wanted to make a statement why didn't you go all the way, doggy dog, gook-face killer -- >> if we wanted to -- >> i'm not done. pork bun and roses, vanilla rice, walking rollers, (bleep),
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just go all out? >> kind of fixed on the slants. >> fixed in more like obsessed. simon's been fighting this trademark battle for over eight years and went to the supreme court even as ruth bader ginsburg called it (bleep). >> everyone knows the slants is using this term not at all to disparage but simply to describe. >> finally after almost a decade, stubbornness paid off. >> the supreme court took one to have the strongest stands ever on the first amendment. >> the supreme court saying no this is part of free speech. >> who knew the slants were so popular with the supreme court. >> the slants can now officially be racist toward themselves, and it was time to celebrate the all new way these asian rock stars new how. because to have the great news, i wasn't even angry when white people started chanting the slants! what's up, guys? we are the slants! ♪ ♪ ♪ you might be asking who cares what this band ask or can't call
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themselves? that's the beauty of creativity. when you allow some passionate asian-american artists to express themselves authentically, you never know what or who it might inspire. >> the p.t.o., they think they're legit but they don't know. (bleep) the p.t.o., (bleep) the p.t.o., in case you didn't know, p.t.o. stands for u.s. patent and trademarks office. within, using the judicial appeals process -- >> single dropping soon. >> trevor: thank you, ronny. ronny chieng, everyone. we'll be right back. ( cheers and applause )
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( cheers and applause ) >> trevor: welcome back to "the daily show." my guest tonight is the co-founder and editor-in-chief of politico, please welcome john harris. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ welcome to the show. >> thank you, trevor. >> trevor: what a time to have you on. i could not be more pleased. politico is in the throws of what is happening right now, especially considering how donald trump and his administration speak about the news and news media as a whole. let's take a step back in the story in terms of talking about met coas an organization. you worked as "the washington post" for over 20 years. >> sure. >> trevor: you started politico as a publication that was going to talk about what was happening in d.c. >> right. >> trevor: looking at what is happening in d.c. now, it's easy to say stuff from the outsued,
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but as someone who has been so closely tied to it for a long time, how does this feel different to you? >> the inside the beltway conversation, the bubble, whatever you call it, that's become a national conversation in ways that are totally outside my experience as a journalist. i'll go home and talk to high school friends who didn't used to care at all about what was going on in washington or what i did as a journalist. they're obsessed with the story and know about it as much as our reporters do. >> trevor: when we look at these people in the administration, one thing that has come to the fore over and over again is the conversation around anonymous sources. >> sure. >> trevor: the president says we shouldn't have anonymous sources. people in that administration say no anonymous sources, these people are lying, leaking stuff, it's not real but the stuff they leak is real, don't listen to it, but it's fake. ( laughter ) help me understand, as a layman who is just reading this -- >> sure. >> trevor: -- what is the purpose of an anonymous source and, more importantly, what is
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the process in and around sourcing from anonymous people? >> the purpose of anonymous source is to get to the truth. would it rather have an on the record source? i would as would any journalist. the reality is if you're really going to try to penetrate and get to the truth, you're going to rely on lots of people who are willing to tell you the truth or some fragment of the truth and it's up to you to assemble and they often will not have their names attached. if i could point out, to me it's an interesting paradox. anybody listening to the president or his people can hear the contempt they express for reporters and you get the sense of this very antagonistic relationship. that's true in a way. in another way, however, this must be among the most transparent administrations i've covered, going back a good long while now. >> wait, what? >> ordinarily -- >> trevor: did you say this is one of the most transparent -- >> simultaneously transparent and secretive, both are true. the transparent part is -- >> trevor: are we high right
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now? ( laughter ) what does that mean? >> let me tell you. ordinarily, if you want to know what's going on inside the west wing, you wait a couple of years for bob woodward to write his book or ten years for somebody to write their memoir and say, oh, my gosh, that's what was really going on. currently, we're finding this out in real time. we know steve bannon and jared kushner don't like each other. we know donald trump is talking to people about whether he should get rid of his chief of staff, reince priebus, all of it plain out in politico and in our competitors in realtime. why? because the west wing is dominated by factions and insecured people who are worried what their adversaries are saying about them and above all dominated by a president who is obsessed with press coverage. so a lot of people know if they want to get a word to the boss, the media is one way to do it. so simultaneously, as people are tell us -- they think it's funny. ( laughter ) as people are throwing up walls
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for the press, some of these same people are actually among our best sources, tell us what's happening in the west wing. >> trevor: here's a question i have, though. when you look at the factions that are in and around trump, do you not worry there may be ulterior motives in telling you what they're telling you. let's say you have a bannon camp and kushner camp, how can you trust the bannon camp is not saying something to disparage kushner. >> the truth comes out over time. ben bradley "the washington post" editor who was in charge of the post-when i started my career there before politico, says the truth comes out in pieces over time. so any individual story is our best effort to get to the truth. time judges which publications are reliable, editors making sure the stories are reliable. everything has sped up, and we live with that, but our core values of trying to get to the
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truth haven't changed. >> trevor: but now you read more twitter. ( laughter ) >> look, the president's twitter account, i said everything speeded up. for nixon, we had to wait for the white house tapes to come out. some of them didn't come out till years later and we said, oh, my gosh, that's what he was thinking. trump, in his own way, is transparent. you don't have to wait for him to tell you what's on his mind, who he's angry at, what his vendettas are, who he wants to pay back, all you have to do is wait till about 10 of 6:00 in the morning, that's usually when he starts, right? so, in that sense, again, people are surprised because they think of trump as secretive, that's true, but he's also transparent in his own way, that's also true, trevor. >> trevor: wow. thank you so much for being here. we will keep reading. we will see over time what truths are revealed, and i wish you the best of luck. >> thank you so much. >> trevor: thank you so much
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for being here. ( cheers and applause ) john harris, everybody. ( cheers and applause ) ♪


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