tv The Daily Show Comedy Central January 10, 2018 11:00pm-11:31pm PST
(applause) but let's get started with the show. and for this first story you will probably want to look up from your phones. unless are you watching this on your phone, then you should keep watching. >> two big apple investors saying that the iphone is toxic to kids. >> writing a letter to apple this weekend saying he needs to address a growing public health crisis. youth phone addiction. apple says they are going to be rolling out some new features but they also are saying they have already had some parental controls in place since 2008. some of those include, you know, some shared accounts, keeping an eye on downloads and one other suggestion they say to talk to your kids. >> trevor: i'm sorry, talk to my kids? why do you think i got them the phone in the first place, apple? you can tell that apple is on top of their game because no other company would have the balls to judge you in their press release. like they write maybe you should talk to your kids, yeah? instead of asking us about feature, maybe you want to update your parent's software, yeah, maybe.
no other brand could pull that off. if a customer complains that an air bag damaged their face when it deployed toyota like your face wasn't that great to begin with, so like whatever. if parents don't want their kids to be a diked to their phones, just buy them the old samsung, that explodes in their kid's face, addiction kicked, done. but let's move on. the issue facing washington is immigration reform. now unfortunately democrats and republicans have never been able to agree on this issue. do you kick all the illegal immigrants out? do you give them a pass path to citizenship? do you take their cuisine and then kick them out? do you clean their house? like what do you do? what do you do? it is a contentious issue and no one has been able to get both parties to make a deal. fort nationally america elected a man with a particular set of skills. and he told us when he was still applying for the job. >> with congress you have to get everybody in a room, and you have to get them to agree. but you have to get them to
agree what you want. app that's part of being a deal maker. you can't leave the white house, go to hawaii and play golf for three weeks and be a real deal maker. it doesn't work that way. you have to get people in, grab them, hug them, kiss them, and get the deal done. but it's got to be the deal that you want. >> trevor: yeah! the deal making president can't just go to hawaii and play golf. he goes to florida. (laughter) much closer. you get an extra nine holes in. yeah, you grab the people, you hug them and you kiss-- it's like turned into harvey weinstein in the middle of that, what is going on. so trump promised to get republicans and democrats into a room. and geses what, yesterday that is exactly what he did. assembling over a dozen congressional leaders to negotiate immigration. now what made this meeting special was that trump invited cameras into the room. which was mind blowing because finally we get to see the president's take charge. so go on, mr. president, tell these fools your position. >> my positions are going to be what the people in this room
come up with. i'm very much rely on the people in this room. if they come to me with things that i'm not in love with, i'm going to do it, because i respect them. (laughter). >> trevor: he is acting like a tough in control leader while at the same time telling everyone he will do anything they want. like let's get there state, ass -- hole i am your bitch. you will walk all over me. and if you have a problem with that, i apologize! now the main discussion in this meeting was what to do about daca which is expiring in march. now daca is a program that allows around 700,000 undocumented immigrants who were brought to the u.s. when they were children to stay in the u.s. and not to be deported. because think about it, they could be punished for a decision that their parents made to bring them here, you know, it's like how were you punished for your parent's decision to take to you supercuts. it's not your fault.
now democrats want to pass daca right now. republicans also want to pass daca you about only if the dem kr59s also agree to fund more border security and of course trump's wall. you guys remember the wall? the one with mexico, remember that wall? so while both sides want daca, there is a clean daca and daca with everything else. if you were running a high level negotiation about daca, this would be a key concept to understand. but if i told you that there was one person in the room yesterday who didn't quite understand, i will bet you can guess who it was. (laughter) so please enjoy this moment. as republican kevin mcquarty has to jump-- mccarthy has to jump it to help the president understand that he just a he grood with the option of what he said he always wanted. >> i would like to ask the quetion wa, about a clean daca bill now, and with the commitment that we would go into
a comprehensive immigration reform procedure. >> i think a lot of people would like to see that. but i think we have to do daca. >> mr. president, you need to be clear though, i think what diane feinstein is asking when we talk about daca, we don't want to be back two years later. you have to have security as the secretary would tell you. >> i think that's what she is saying. >> i think she's saying something different. >> trevor: it looks likes mccarthy was gently correcting a stupid kid, you know, i want clean daca. >> no, mr. president, you don't want clean dhaka. >> i don't want clean daca. i won't lie, i think it's so cute that whenever trump is out of his depth he gives himself away with that little hug he gives himself for comfort. lake his little thunder shirt, he does that thing. look at him, he looks like the oldest b-boy in the craw, you know, all you have to do is put him in a music video and he would crush t he would be killing the game. go dj, go dj, go dj. >> actually, actually, it's not fair to say that trump knows
nothing about what he wants on immigration reform. all right, he might be a little short on facts, but the important thing is he has got the feeling. >> having the democrats in with us is absolutely vital because this should be a bipartisan bill. this should be a bill of love, truly, it should be a bill of love. >> trevor: that's right, people. this should be a bill of love. which is ridiculous. you don't get to call that a bill of love, right, that's a bill that funds a 2,000 mile wall. you don't call that the bill of love. even if the wall is full of glory holes, all right? which i fully believe trump wantings. that's not real love, all right. a cheap fix, sure. does it feel great? yes. but real love? i mean unless you go back to the whole regular and they know your name, then maybe. if you care for the hole and the hole cares for you, then maybe it's love, like the real question is what are you willing
to do for the hole. do you expect the hole to do anything in return. that's real love. (laughter) but it's funny to hear trump talking about love and immigration. especially after you hear the cruel decision that he made on monday. >> about 200,000 immigrants from el salvadore could face deportation next year after the white house announced it is ending their temporary protective status. >> these individuals who have been granted temporary protective status now have 18 months to try to find another legal way to stay in the united states or be sent back to el el sl va dor. many fled because of violence during that country's civil war or after the 2001 earthquake which devastated the country. >> trevor: while the president's bill of love put puts on a show for the cameras, behind the scenes his administration is kicking out 200,000 people who have lived in the u.s. illegally for decades. which is heartless. because these people have set up their whole lives. they have jobs, they have houses, many of them have kids
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(applause). >> trevor: welcome back to the daily show. when a news story falls through the cracks our very own lewis black catches it for a segment we call back in black. (applause) >> it's a new year and a on newier's day while most of us new yorkers were chiseling the frozen vomit from our mouths, mayor bill de blasio was being sworn in for a second term. so let's check in on how his city's doing. >> the homicide rate in new york city has reached a record low, 2017 there were 290 killings, the lowest amount since the city began keeping crime stats in 1963. >> while crime is up in many of the nation's cities, the rate here in new york has fallen to levels not seen since the 1950s. >> that's right. crime in new york is lower than
denver and seattle which is great news for people who don't want to be number one! come on, murderers! where is your hometown pride! you can't find people to kill in new york city? i met five people from the cab to the front door that i wanted to kill. so the good news is, with crime down in new york but the bad news is that segregation is up. >> a new study suggests there is a genetic divide between uptown rats and downtown rats. the rats that live in updown north of 59th street are distinct from those living in downtown south of 14th street. they try to stay to those neighborhoods. >> of course downtown rats don't want to hang out with those snooty uptown rats. eating their imported cheese and doing their rat soul cycle. but don't tell me uptown rats never go downtown. where else do they get their
weed. and even with 2 million ratings there is something even worse underground in new york city. the subway. >> endless days of delays as our subway system seems to be disintegrated. >> subway delayed surged nearly 300 first in pief years. >> new york is the most frequently delayed subway system in the world. the only system that comes anywhere close in terms of delays is mexico city, and even that is 71% on time versus 65% on time for new york. >> mexican trains are faster? thank god! i may be late for my prostate exam here but at least i will be on time for my unlicensed scrotal rejuvenation there. i am doing it for me. so i feel more self-confident. and new york could fix the subway but like anthony weiner
in a divorce settlement, you're going to pay. >> a new report finds the mta spends more money on subway construction than any other city in the world. >> it costs between 4 and ten times as much as a comparable subway would cost in comparable well-developed modern cities. >> paris built a subway line for 370 million dollars per mile. while the mta built a second avenue subway extension for 2.7 billion per mile. z. >> sacrebleu new york subway construction costs nearly ten times as much aspr is. a city where people spend $12 bucks for macaroons. they are just fancy french oreos. so why didn't new york subways cost so much? well, you're going to love this. >> the mta now projects the east side access project will cost 10.2 billion, about 6 billion more than the original budget. >> most of the cash is going to the labor costs $9un-- 900
people were being paid to dig tunnels for that project. they found that only 700 of those people had actual job descriptions and jobs. the other 200 people had no reason to be there. >> 200 new yorkers hanging out with nothing better to do. also known as a pretty good brooklyn nets crowd. you know what is worse than 200 subway workers getting paid to do literally nothing? the fact that i'm not one of them! who has got two thumbs and likes to sit around with that up his ass. this guy! i don't know why i have to fix everything in this city myself. but if your problems are subways that don't run and rads the size of giant dogs, why not put the rads to work doing the jobs the subways don't. >> trevor: lewis black, everyone. (applause) we'll be right back.
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(applause) welcome to the show. >> thanks so much. >> trevor: you are an amazing filmmaker. you know, mud bound the film we saw now which is coming out on netflix but a lot of people know your work from pariah. you created a story that really touched on how your life could have been. when you look at a film, are you trying to imbue a piece of yourself within it? >> i think like part of it happens, you know, deliberately. and then i think there is the stuff that slips in accidentally. so for me looking back, i
realized that in my work there is always this element of like home, about not being able to go back home, like in pariah, she ends up going to berkeley to get away from home. and then in bessie, you know, queen latifah when she goes back, when she goes home that is when she gets stabbed and hurt in this film, these two guys have gone off to war, coming back home was the real battle lines. >> i think that kind of fear of home is something that slips in, i don't know, i should talk to a therapist or something, but that is the thing. >> trevor: i guess in different ways both have a fear of not coming home. mudbound is a film about americans without go off to war, two americans who should be the 15eu78, one is black, one is white. when they come back they experience a very different country even though they both fought for the same thing. >> yeah, the thing that is interesting, these two soldiers from different families. and so they kind of have been outside the bubble. and their whole kind of thing is that they have gone over to fight in world war ii. they come back home. there is no ticker tape parade for them. you kind of muted celebrations.
and you know, they have ptsd before there was really a name for that. so they are just like self-medicating. they are drinking. and neither family really u7bd stands them and they kind of connect with each other and find this friendship because of that trauma. these guys ordinarily wouldn't talk to each other but they have this thing because they are the only guy that understands what they have gone through. so i think that is kind of interesting to del-of-into how when people are cracked or broken, that is when kind of like empathy can kind of creep in or seep in, yeah. >> trevor: isn't that something you are trying to create in the film is an empathy because it feels like the story touches on so many different themes. on one end i'm feeling for veterans who come back and aren't treated the way they should be by their governments. on the other hand, i feel for black americans who fight for a country that don't treat them equally as they would every other american. and then on the other side you are seeing how women are treated in american society. was that intentional on your part?
>> yeah, and hillary jordan, the author of the book, these multiple points of view, was the con seeft the book and i wanted to make that there was balance and newance and wanted to get to that everybody is fighting on their own front, the two many, mary j and kerry, they are heading like the man is the head of the household and had to disa bay. the and the two sons, they are fitting this idea of mental-- of men tam trauma and you have these two farmers played by rob morgan and jason clark, and these guys both love the land. but they are both connected to really unequal ways. and so but they both have this sense of being disinherited. they both feel like they can take title, they are entitled to this place. and one of them literally is because he holds the deed and the other one can't, even though he does the deed that keeps the farm going. so everybody is kind of like, in a conflicted, fighting on those fronts and i want you-- you may
not agree with someone but you can certainly understand kind of their worldview. >> trevor: it is interesting how it feels like the women in the film have to do a lot more of that. that there is a defendant touch that they all possess with regard to navigating the emotions of the men they have it deal with. mary jblige is fl, the costume is amazing. the film is beautiful but mary j disz blige i have never seen her like this in a movie. how did you get her, was it easy to get her to say i will do this with no lashes, no wig, it is not going to be me in makeup. just me as raw as possible. >> i had to talk her into that part of it. but it was kind of great, hi done wees yea before so i knew her manager. he managed queen latifah and mary. so when i was putting the cast together i asked him do you think mary would ever consider doing this, it was like a hail mary. when she says no, we'll move on. she read it and said yes, oh my
god. so then it was disappearing into the character and just like in a way, i think it is freeing because you know, she could kind of let go, you know, of the exterior an be this very interior person. she is gorgeous, she is beautiful with very little makeup on as we talk about she tried to sneak in eyelashes every now and then or sneak in nails. no, no gel tips, what is that in the segment is that a [bleep] french manicure, like no. >> trevor: you are an amazing guest, you make amazing films, thank you so much for being on the show. >> thank you for having me. >> trevor: we will be right >> trevor: we will be right back.
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experience space for the unexpected with the rx l, part of the rx family. experience amazing at your lexus dealer. (applause). >> trevor: that's our show for tonight, before we g let's check in with jord an klepper at the opposition. jordan, steve bannon leaving breet barlt, are you doing okay, man? >> jordan: hey, getting fired is all part of his genius plan, correction, his stable, genius plan. yes, they know. the man say patriot, unlike sneaky senator dianne feinstein who illegally released transcrypts about shall-- . >> trevor: we're talking about the thing with trump, the pee-pee tape. >> jordan: for the last time there is no pee just like the word psychiatrist it has no p. your fancy diction aerosays it has a p but i have never heard it. >> trevor: are you ahead of the curve. i can't wait to see what you expose on tonight's show, stay tuned for the opposition coming up next.
now here it is, your moment of zen. >> it was a tremendous meeting, actually it was reported as incredibly good and my performance, some of them called it a performance, i consider it work, but got great reviews by everybody, other than two networks who were phenomenal for about two hours.tral >> jordan: hurry up, get in here, lots to cover tonight. it's january 10. we're in double digits, people. things are moving fast. my opponent tonight is brian kloss. give it up. now brian is an expert on deck tairts and authoritarian rulers.