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tv   2016 White House Correspondents Dinner  CSPAN  April 30, 2016 6:00pm-11:01pm EDT

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85%. it is so white, it could talk back to the police. [laughter] high-five for that. liveome to c-span's coverage of the annual white house correspondents dinner. 2700 correspondents and guests will gather in the 30,000 square foot hilton ballroom tonight for dinner, speeches, jokes and networking. and c-span will be live through it all, beginning with the arrival at the hilton, which you are watching right now. if you would like to make a comment while you are watching, go to facebook.com/cspan, or follow us on twitter using the hashtag, the view ages cd --
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whcd. now we will watch the early arrivals who are on their way to the reception, sponsored by different media organizations. the dinner itself will begin at 8:00 p.m. eastern time. [chatter]
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[lots of chatter]
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>> hello, hello.
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>> live coverage of the arrivals at the washington correspondent dinner. heyman.es mr. who have you seen so far? heyman: i have seen everyone from a kardashian to a cnn host. a real mix of people. >> i think i saw aretha franklin. mr. heyman: yes. >> she was the entertainment for 1999. had a greatyes, she reception. >> when did this become almost a hollywood centric event. mr. heyman: the is interesting, many people think it has always been this way. but it was really sent the
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1980's and has intensified it since. in timepened around when gary hart was bringing people who are media figures cannot just political figures -- figures, not just political figures. and then they began to bring stars. and it was lobbied by many big stars. >> and there was bryan cranston. mr. heyman: yes. >> so people magazine has tables? mr. heyman: correct. we have been going to the dinner for many years. >> who are your guests? a deaf activist who is presently on dancing with the stars. jenna fischer from the office.
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and people who are working with hillary clinton on her campaign. a real mix of insiders and hollywood people. rank in termsis of other dinners? mr. heyman: it is glamorous. many celebrities are fascinated by washington and washington is very fascinated by hollywood. there is not a shortage of guests. this is an enormous event, would you get a sense of by looking at the people here. there are thousands in this room, so it is not an intimate party. and from the red carpet, you go is bellamy who plays the first lady on scandal. >> and the dinner will start at 8:00 p.m. let's watch more arrivals.
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[chatter] as we continue to watch the arrivals, the attorney general right there. we have a lot more hollywood than we have washington. mr. heyman: for sure. and if you look in the background, that is one of the most famous people you might not recognize. he was an agent. that was the brother of rahm emanuel in the background. has written ae couple of books. mr. heyman: a very high achieving family. commentator: you recognize these two people?
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maybe not. bringing an instrument. commentator: have you attended this dinner? mr. heyman: i have been many times and i have seen it you evolved over the last -- seen it evolved over the last seven years as it has become one of the high points on the red carpet calendar for many. commentator: in case people do not know, only accredited white house correspondents receive tickets that they can invite -- tickets, but they can invite guests. mr. heyman: yes. it you really see an array of stars, those of politics and also journalists.
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many in our industry are invited. and bernie sanders is coming? mr. heyman: that is correct. many are excited to see him. and other people running for office, as well. commentator: he was invited by cbs. donald trump is not attending. he was invited a few years ago. mr. heyman: that is not necessarily because he came too much. people tend to go for the joke. orosa,s homero so -- am who is a supporter of donald trump and probably best known as a contestant on her show. -- on his show. she made quite a splash.
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i do not think that she one. -- won. commentator: 2700 people will be attending the event. mr. heyman: this is beyond the chocca, a stara in hollywood. she originally was a star of india before she came to hollywood and has really taken the town by storm. a very beautiful and talented actress. commentator: some folks told me that they will be wearing some -- under the long dresses. mr. heyman: there is a lot of walking involved. this is sort of a subterranean complex, so when you go to the dinner and you enter, you might be going to several cocktail parties and receptions, rooms off of the crowded quarters. these people are coming down from the lobby on an escalator
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and going to various rooms that can feel like a bus terminal. commentator: jd heyman, is it becoming more common for women to wear comfortable shoes? women like to wearator high heels. there might be a pair of comfortable shoes in their bag. slippers they have that you can slip on. there is actually a machine that dispenses them and people are great for the end of the night to have these to slip into and out of the heels. is newt like this gingrich. commentator: it is newt gingrich. mr. heyman: a big attender of
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the events. and the former senator from connecticut. commentator: by the way, if you would like to make comments throughout the dinner, you can we the hashtag on twitter, hcd. there is senator tim scott, the republican from south carolina. rubio indorsed marco the primary. mr. heyman: correct. commentator: ashley banfield. mr. heyman: on the right. hasinally from canada, she really created a spectacular journalism career in the united
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states. commentator: on msnbc. mr. heyman: ashley banfield again. commentator: how often does washington pop up in people magazine? mr. heyman: quite a bit. we cover the campaigns, the politics and the news throughout the year, but certainly during a presidential year. we cover them fairly exhaustively. some from a popular perspective. commentator: the host of faith
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the nation -- face the nation behind them. mr. heyman: another star of "scandal," which is always well represented. castntire cap usually -- usually descends on washington. commentator: it looks like the entire cast, courtesy of abc, along with anthony anderson and others from "blacklist." mr. heyman: that is right. commentator: have the obama
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years been good for the magazine and for the dinners? mr. heyman: president obama is incredibly popular in hollywood, so from the beginning he has brought a lot of people here. dinnersgoing to the during the bush years and there was a difference. commentator: a star of "empire," who is talking to the press secretary. mr. heyman: and a star of "homeland." he played a very complicated part. billionaire on a a new show. he is a guest of cbs.
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commentator: the white house press secretary could not come invitation. just to be clear. even the president could not come without an invitation. mr. heyman: that is right. this is the time where it is
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reversed. when those at the white house need the access. commentator: [indiscernible] mr. heyman: in the sense it makes people uncomfortable, you mean the celebrities and politicians mixed? i think -- there is a vivid that fox. -- vivica a. yes, sometimes they feel uncomfortable about it. the new york times does not attend the event anymore. they wonder if it is appropriate for celebrities and washington and all of them to mingle. but it gives you both a chance to see folks with their hair down a little bit. through a different window. who is that?
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mr. heyman: that is a rising star. commentator: an invitation that folks in hollywood go for? mr. heyman: yes, incredibly attractive for those in hollywood and they really do enjoy coming. commentator: jamie alexander. mr. heyman: that is right. one of the hottest new stars in television, really seeing her career rising. keep forgetting that we are not on camera in the studios, and i think people that i even recognize. mr. heyman: it is the mix that makes it interesting. newt gingrich and jamie
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alexander in a room, kind of fun. mr. heyman: jamie alexander's show is very popular, called "blindspot." there is quite a lot of media down there. mr. heyman: for sure. and it goes back to the celebrity sort of traffic jam. commentator: the dinner began in 1914, all white and all mail. mr. heyman: -- all male.
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mr. heyman: some aspect of that has been maintained in terms of the loose attitudes about powerful people. and the main people have been pretty tolerant of that. famously, some not happy about the jokes made. here is helen mirren. commentator: and look at that prince tattoo. mr. heyman: it looks like the prince symbol. is a star who has only gotten bigger. commentator: and that is tammy who is with nbc for a long time. she hosts the breakfast that is held the morning of, so that was this morning. it brings in quite a few celebrities and charities, as well. -- heyman: taylor has berg
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taylor, the very famous director, the husband of helen mirren. commentator: is that kennedy from fox? mr. heyman: it does look like kennedy. yeah. it does. by the way, but tv interviewed -- book tv interviewed her. you can type in kennedy and freedom fest if you like to watch the interview. now what is with the clothes? mr. heyman: address on the red
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carpet -- a dress on the red carpet must be shown off. and any celebrity or model knows how to show it off. that is what is happening here. commentator: not many of us in washington know how to do that. mr. heyman: they need to have a seminar. -- there is fox. mr. heyman: it looks like the fox crew. commentator: you are watching the red carpet arrivals for the white house correspondents dinner. up.ill try to set
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[chatter]
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commentator: you are watching live coverage of the arrivals for the white house correspondents dinner.
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there is samantha augustine from usta from show -- aug the today show. twitter followers have called me out. had someone comments on msnbc. an anchor who is now on cnn. mr. heyman: cameron hall was very close to prince. there was talk she may not come tonight, she was very upset by his death. [chatter] there is the senior adviser to the president.
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mr. heyman: there is gayle king. cbs thisg working for morning, but also a good friend of oprah winfrey. scanning this, i cannot find valerie jarrett.
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>> john kerry just walked in. yeah.esa heinz kerry, >> there's his daughter, his elder daughter behind him. she's a doctor. and the other daughter on the left. i didn't see her. one a filmmaker and one a doctor. >> and it looks like valerie jarrett's guest is cbs. cbs has valerie jarrett, morgan , joshn, aretha franklin earnest, press, and bernie sanders all as their guest tonight.
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>> that was chris wallace that just walked through. some of the fox guests include jeff goldblum and vinegar fox and cheryl ladd -- vivica fox. how elong. tony romo. >> speaking of fox, greta van .usteren just walked in sometimes when you watch people walk in, you can tell what is on their mind. another shot here of gayle king and valerie jarrett. valerie jarrett stays in chicago. the ultimate washington insider. i don't think she's from
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washington. >> no. trump is in the house here. sort of interesting juxtaposition there, damien lewis. wonder what people talk about at this dinner sometimes. but kind of conversation have you had at this dinner? >> i have brought a lot of interesting people to this dinner. jonasne from the brothers. >> the national monetary fund. >> yes. the jonas brothers? >> are brought the jonas brothers. sting, mick jagger, quite an array of people. miranda lambert.
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and kristin gillibrand, the senator from new york, so a real range. >> what is mick jagger like as a dinner partner? >> he is terrific. terrific. christine lagarde, only one of the most powerful women in the world. >> scanning to find out to whom she belongs, which media organization. >> i believe that she is a gust of "the wall street journal," which makes sense. good guest for them. >> speaking of "the wall street journal," they also invited
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christie turlington burns, susan rice. burns family outing. i saw donald trump junior as well. both of his sons are there. no sign of his daughter-in-law. >> according to someone here on there's one protester out front. i'm trying to get the gist of why they are protesting. the black guy with the saxophone we saw earlier that nobody recognized was larry wilmore,
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you know, the host. >> that was not larry wilmore sorry, dr. sinister. the think he will be at reception for the president. have you attended that? >> i have. one of the things we tend to do , we have beention lucky in the white house has been gracious enough to do that. had a chance to see the man himself, which was quite an honor. >> they have been with them for years and years, haven't they? helped them fire
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people. >> now, we are looking at michelle dockery, best known in this country as the unfortunate
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for her badness-plagued lady mary from "downton abbey." but she seems to be doing well. she got her happy ending at the end of the show -- spoiler alert if you have not caught up with it. i apologize. donald trump junior. >> who invited the twins? i've been going through my papers. >> it's interesting. i could not find it either. people might not know that fiancee dockery lost her . madly in love with an irish fellow she had been seeing for a long time. very sad. >> she is a guest of reuters news organization along with from "the new york
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times.k" >> we're seeing some of the women from "the view" here. joy behar on the left. is, are guest of abc, which of course, their network. >> if they got this far, chances are they have a ticket. you're not going to get far without a ticket. >> these are stars of a very popular comedy show. >> you said there was a marked obama-era between the dinners and bush-era dinners. --the bush-era dinners were
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both president bush and president obama were very good at giving warm and funny iteches at this dinner, but certainly was an uptick, i think, in the kind of glamour and intensity in the first years of the obama administration because there was a lot of excitement in comedy about it, but i would not want to undersell president george w. bush possibility to really give a funding and engaging speech. of course, president obama is also very good at being funny. >> this dinner has become a week. >> it has. it has become a week of parties.
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a lot of networks have all kinds of parties. >> you are based in los angeles. in the west side of los angeles, people have correspondents all around the world. steve johnson, i was i had known that. i appreciate knowing it. there's joy of a heart again.
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raven symone there with the burgundy tie. there. cameron bure i think she's a guest of the christian broadcast network. evangelicalut christian, as is her brother, who has become better known as a star of movies aimed at that community. house," theuller star of the netflix show. this fellow is an instagram sensation. he is very well-known known. i think he is a guest of "the
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huffington post" and also a plus size model. talking about the guy with the quite prominent grade. nyle dimarco, he won "america's next top model" and has become quite popular. he is actually a local boy. he is from maryland. he is really using his appearance to be an advocate for deaf education. the preeminent university for deaf.th -- the michael kelly there.
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one of my all time favorites from "downton abbey." and father ofver daughter.ybil's thought he and lady mary were going to get together. >> i thought so, too. they worked so hard together. and they are great friends in real life. mclachlan standing by. twin peaksy, since all those years ago. he is with his wife, i believe, desiree gruber, who is a publicist, well known in hollywood and new york entertainment.
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you are seeing the woman in the beautiful sort of floral purple dress. she is in the next "star wars" film and is pretty well known as an actress. she has done quite a number of things both in hollywood and in the u.k. lucky enough to become of part of the whole "star wars" series. in episode eight she will appear. of course, one of the great power couples in washington when they come together.
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>> former federal reserve chair. >> the atlantic, one of the big media organizations at this event, having a media reception. >> the atlantic has the ceo of uber, probably one of the most sought after people tonight if you need an uber. , star ofonnie britton "nashville" and before that, "friday night lights." graduated from dartmouth college. grew up in washington. really one of the nicest people you would ever want to meet.
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>> there's joanne reid, just cannot with a new book talking about the obamas and the clintons. msnbc viewers. chair of the rnc here, probably happy to have a night with some celebrities. ce rinse previous -- rhin priebus and his wife. did you happen to see who invited them? >> i did not see that, but i get they -- i'd that they are going to get a lot of questions tonight.
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reince priebus meeting joy behar. they have absolutely nothing in common politically. a senior member of the democratic caucus here in washington on the left. whip in the house. >> steny hoyer. there is the affirmation -- the
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aforementioned fat jewish. guest of arianna huffington. i don't know how he gets his braid to do that. that's pretty impressive. >> the actual dinner festivities are due to begin at 8:00 p.m. eastern time. >> first became popular as the star of "real housewives of atlanta." she is getting a touch up here from it looks like her stylist. >> 8:00 p.m. at the dinner
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program and they will be dinner. there's a few speeches. after that at about 9:45 is when it is due to begin again. we will be watching that all evening. >> it's funny, there are always surprises. people show up to this event that you were not expecting. who everybodyknow
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is, and then someone else wa invited, or there's a last-minute ad. maybe they came with cnn. >> i don't have a cnn page. >> i don't, either. >> you got to learn that move. another guest, jenna fischer. >> born in indiana. >> that's right. she is a delight. enjoying notnk, being on a network series right now. she tries to schmooze some folks here in washington. she's a great guest and a lot of fun.
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>> guests of abc, not cnn. >> that's interesting. down.being walked there's al sharpton. is a thing. ito it is a thing and a fad. we will see if it last. there's michael kelly. michael kelly from house of cards. cena, an action star.
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i should say michael cena is huge in the wwe. john sena, i'm sorry -- john cena. i'm sorry. i think i misspoke. jenna fischer again.
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>> these are the arrivals of the washington hilton's for the 100 -- 102nd annual white house correspondents dinner. journalists are invited to this, and they can bring guest's, and over the years, it has become kind of a -- celeb fest.
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it scheduled to go all night with the program. you will hear from the president. morewill hear from larry wil of "the nightly show." lee is the president this year of the white house correspondents association. there will be some journalism scholarships given. --the main course tonight petite filet o propp paired with honey and orange infused shrimp, onfit, asparagus, zucchini, asparagus and roasted pepper. >> incident intimate dinner for about 8000. a lot of people. >> 30,000 square feet.
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2700 or so guests. there's only an extra 7000 feet in this dining room. >> will they get the food on all they tables, and then clean it up pretty quickly -- pretty impressive. you can see what people are liningere is they are up. some people, when there is a millic jam, have to just around, but they are interested in talking to the press, so they stand there and wait their turn. candace cameron bure, star of "full or house -- "fuller house." nae nae leaks giving her red -- nene leakes
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giving her red carpet pose. , a fashionthe right journalist who has become quite well known. everybody wants to see the back of the dress. you can scene of campbell -- you coming up,e campbell putting her hands in the pockets of her dress. next to lisa evan steen -- edelstein. >> who is?
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, veteranan actress hollywood actress. >> you are listening to jd haynes of "people" magazine helping identify some of these folks that are walking through. j.d.: neve campbell again, trained as a ballerina and became famous on the show "party of five." moved to london for a few years and is now back in hollywood
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making a name for herself. >> that of course is nina dobrov. dobrev, another canadian. >> jd heyman, you have been at this dinner. what is this crush like right now? people still waiting to get in, people watching. j.d.: it is really an intense
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moment. actress, perhaps best-known -- she had a cameo role in "goneit is an intense m. you have people well-known. they get their pictures taken one after the other. is that the mother? j.d.: i guess it is. >> she looks 20 years younger without that wig on. j.d.: also was in bridesmaids and lots of things. also -- mindy, almost didn't recognize her. that is indeed her. she was on my flight. template -- really talented comedian. i believe that is vanessa kerry.
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rosario.om >> and she is supporting bernie sanders. ..d.: yes, correct quite outspoken in her support of bernie sanders. lot 16, i am working on my law this evening? i'm watching the red carpet, the white house correspondents dinner on c-span. [background chatter]
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j.d.: angela womack says that king came inregina a little while ago. kerryt talking to vanessa there, moving back into the patrol. regina king slipped in well we were speaking. -- while we were speaking. to 227. it back -- all the way back to 227. ,er guest is from usa today quite a strange group of people here tonight. campbell, jenner came in
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earlier. we also have people from quantico. one of the most critically acclaimed shows of the fall season. smile,t brendan covey and gabrielle, and of course, rachel mcadams. is the guest of the boston globe, which was the paper she works for in the movie , also in spotlight. photojournalism. she has become quite close to the real-life supporters she plays in the film, and she would naturally want to come with the outlet and was very much up for it. >> larry wilmore is the entertainment tonight.
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during the eisenhower administration. j.d.: it really is a very tough getting for anybody. for a long time affair, to be clever and to trod the line between funny and being offensive, which is hard to do. and that looks like megyn kelly down the escalator. megyn kelly, of course, having a huge year and really coming to batsnence with her ongoing with donald trump during the campaign. and someone from yahoo!. in, michaelweet
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kelly walking the red carpet at the white house correspondents dinner made me really happy and also creeped out. j.d.: i think that is the way he would want her to feel. seeing a lot of the talking heads from this campaign season coming in. anybody who has been following election coverage this year will notice many of the people in this room are people who regularly appear on cable news, with tidings about one candidate or another. a whole bunch of cnn folks walked in. and nbc to .
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[background chatter] j.d.: megyn kelly. and stephen burn wants to know when and where is the mood from?
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that is the white house correspondents dinner, the intervening comments a couple of years ago. the washington post has been there for several years, one of the few places in washington that has security, entrance for the president, a lot of security precautions to take into consideration when getting on this dinner. ,0,000 square foot ballroom 3000 square foot kitchen for the many people. j.d.: we might have caught a glance of will smith, who walked in, and jada pinkett smith. guests.are abc j.d.: will smith and jaden smith famously did not go to the oscars this year. right.'s
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j.d.: you really can't see at this point after the people leave this area, they go into a series of rooms that are quite crowded, posing for pictures. smith -- jada smith. smiths this the year obviously caused quite a stir by speaking out about the lack of african-american nominees at the academy awards, and mr. smith was in concussion, a movie that got a lot of critical acclaim, but did not find an audience.
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he did not get the nomination he wanted. >> has significant politically wouldn't have been -- how significantly would he have been [indiscernible] very, very big deal in hollywood. tonight, cheryl brown eyes and, the african-american head of the motion picture academy is here at the awards. i'm the really, i think started a huge conversation about race in hollywood. and as you know, it has always been a perennial issue.
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j.d.: he came back to get his picture taken, and they are shutting their names now. snuck in and came back around to have their photos taken. [background chatter] >> when an actress is outspoken like to the pinkett smith about her husband's nomination, is that helpful or hurtful? j.d.: at this stage of the game, it is pretty miniscule.
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[indiscernible] think jada smith has never the a big box office star weight will smith has globally. she has worked subtly in television. and has always had a reputation for being an outspoken person. people come to expect she is going to speak her mind. >> everybody is wearing the same outfit.
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j.d.: having a good time out there. job.ld on, i need another are you ready? are you ready, here we go. j.d.: they are taking pictures of the top rotc behind them. -- of the paparazzi behind them. [cheers] will smith: thank you, thank you. j.d.: this is what is called making an entrance. will smith: good job. j.d.: hard to follow that.
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>> do we know the identity of this animal? middleton is tom there on the left. williams in the biopic about the great country singer. and that is carrie fisher's dog, she traveled with that dog all the time. carrie fisher is famously very
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attached to her pooch. >> did she get it signed off as a therapy dog? j.d.: she may have. they travel everywhere together. is general she layer, she is a general in the new star wars movie. also one of the funniest people in hollywood. he will follow her right off. >> i wonder if her mother has ever attended. [speaking simultaneously] middleton really one of the most acclaimed actors, new actors, of his generation. a shade of blue, a dark blue, that thing.
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for those of you just tuning in to the c-span, it may not sound like c-span. we can talk about appropriations. >> donald from cbs. this is the white house correspondents dinner. this is the arrival. coverage began at 6:00 p.m. dinner program begins at 8:00 p.m., and there is a break for the pre-dinner program which will will take life. we will show you scenes and videos from last week of events and people surrounding this dinner, and then of course, we will be live with the entire program and we will shut up and just let you watch.
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>> pretty marshall says this dog is owning the red carpet. j.d.: the first time i have seen a dog at the white house correspondents dinner. >> ok, the dog is scratching fleas right into the red carpet. [background chatter] >> yes, it is true. carrie fisher's dog have a twitter account. i can't quite read the handle, but we'll put it on the screen so if you want to follow. already has 1000 followers --
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over 8000 followers. _thedog. j.d.: gary fisher and carrie fisher, so everyone knows. having a lot of fun with the name. we have not seen bernie sanders. i am guessing he is not going to go to the red carpet. >> he may have fled on through. wolf spencer, a stable at this event. has been every year i can remember. sitting next to tom middleton. to tomding next middleton. j.d.: and kate baldwin.
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i am assuming gary fisher is out of view and carrie fisher is talking. >> why do so many hollywood people have [indiscernible] j.d.: it is a natural kind of celebrity.f when you are that famous, and you have the kind of resources that they do, certainly there is a cynical reason to have a cause. you really ought to do something . that is more important than the money and yourself. and lastly, it is a natural
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impulse on the part of very wealthy people and powerful people who want to be engaged in their life. so it is both for public reasons and financial manager reasons and just human reasons people become involved in either political or environmental or other work related to causes. i know in most americans, they raise an eyebrow of the causes of celebrities. many of them feel their causes are profound. if you want to engage i feel no blessing does not come without a leash, they must do something with their celebrity and the resources. some people, like george clooney, are extremely fundamentally serious about it, , more less so superficial. i think there is quite a number of people, whatever you think of their politics, whoever are quite serious about this.
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>> you can see people in the background coming down the escalators over there from the receptions, because they have to go to the magnetometers and the heavy security. j.d.: there is a huge queue of people lining up just to get through the metal detector. they are paid to come late or early. doctor --en, the dinner does not start on time. j.d.: right. anything involving the president of united dates, getting in and out of this hotel is very difficult. connecticut avenue, runs next to
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the hotel, pretty much a parking lot. very hard to get in and out. even if you are a celebrity, you may walk a few blocks to get in. >> support of the white house ssociation,nts' a carol lee, she is a white house reporter. also on the board, jon decker, olivier knox. you often see is shots. margaret to live -- margaret bloomberg, josh earnest will be at the head table as well. mills. ear carol lee speak, and then at the end of the dinner we will hear from
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becauseon from reuters, he will host next year. they have already started planning it. they don't of the president is going to be. on president often put this his or her calendar immediately. j.d.: this event is always accompanied by a history of the white house correspondents' association and their role and engagement with the presidents. it is usually a good film about the role of journalism and public disclosure and engaging with the press. that is the introduction of scholarship to young journalists from around the country, is another high point of view. >> a look at the things you'll see that mrs. obama takes time with two really hug. -- to really hug. j.d.: she spends time talking to
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them, hugging to them, the kids are thrilled to meet the president and the first lady. j.d.: very long interview with tom middleton. >> carrie fisher was still going too. j.d.: when a red carpet has really been, she rushes through. it looks like they got time to answer these questions deliberately and full paragraphs . no one is going to hustle them down. tweets inn history that roland burton and joe madison would have been better commentators.
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i feel like i am listening to golf. we are watching c-span, there alive in history. j.d.: i can tell a few jokes. i won't go crazy. >> a lot of tweets about kerry the dog -- gary the dog. j.d.: gary is pretty cool. the first course, diver scallops, sweet potato mousell ine, caramelized corn and escalope cream. the entree is a petit filet, honey and orange infused shrimp, duck confit, zucchini and
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roasted pepper. and the desert is a tapas display of desserts, dolce to j mini frenchleche, pastries and assorted french macaroons. and that is what they are having to eat. a couple of different wines too. at the valley -- napa valley. aretickets for this dinner $300, that is with a cost per ticket. and again, only people from the white house correspondents accredited journalists, who cover the white house, and members of the white house correspondents association can be invited to this dinner.
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we learned from julia whiston, the executive director of the white house correspondents, about 2700 people have paid, and even if you want to be considered, you have to send a check. she had to send back 900 checks this year for people who could not get in. one of the things you can't see is as you come in from the upper level, a lot of people wait to see the celebrities come by. there's probably about another upstairs onwho were the upper floor of this venue, just crowded around these red ropes to see their favorite stars from hollywood and political. i think a lot of people camped out there for the whole weekend.
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ofjd heyman, we are a couple miles from washington. we will let you go. will you be down there? j.d.: i will take a car back. hopefully i will get there before they serve the chocolate mousse you talking about. they always hand up chocolate mousses, so i hope to get some. >> jd heyman is the executive editor of entertainment with people magazine.
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>> this is live coverage of the arrivals at the washington hilton, and here is the inside of the ballroom where the actual dinner take place. events begin at 8:00 this evening. the pre-dinner program begins at 8:00 this evening, which of course we will be live. people starting to fill in, the marine band of their. that is -- up there. that is sergeant king at the top, tall fellow in the red. and the marine band behind the they were-- podium, taking up too much space, and they needed to space for the table. this is live coverage for the 102nd annual white house correspondents' dinner.
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this is c-span's live coverage of the washington correspondents' dinner, inside the ballroom. --ie thousand square feet 30,000 square feet. that is the democratic whip of the house, a dipping to walk across the ballroom. in a few minutes, we saw him walking, we saw anthony anderson secretary, and the ibus, ande c-span's live coverage will continue her of the evening. therage will begin with pre-dinner program. we will hear from carol lee of the wall street journal. the first lady and president will be
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introduced. the presentation of colors, and then they have dinner. dinner includes diver scallops, sweet potato mouseline as well escalopelized corn and cream. then we have a petit filet au poivre paired with honeyed shrimp. that is accompanied by duck pepper andsted zucchini. and then dessert, dulche de leche, mousse, along with many french pastries and assorted macaroons. many wines throughout the dinner. the wine is served out of napa valley and it is a cabernet
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sauvignon. also from foreign corner virginia. in the crowd, only people who are only journalists who are accredited by the white house to be invited to this dinner. they concern the invite guests, and you can see a lot of the folks are guests. we have seen them arrive, and watching them right now. but we mentioned the menu, and we want to show you the kitchen of the hilton, 23,000 square feet of kitchen. this past week we talked with the chef about the preparations. worry? your biggest >> failure. >> just any kind of failure?
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>> something goes wrong, it goes wrong. .t is a high-profile group but any group here, half of them are high-profile. so from a chef standpoint, your concerned -- you are concerned from last week, two weeks ago, the groups coming in, maybe last week was the white house correspondents dinner, but i don't stress over it. 90, i just i was walk through the process, every process, every step we do that day. i go over 20, 30 times in my head prior to the functions happening. that way, i am ready. cody ofwas chef andre
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the hilton, the washington hilton, one of the largest ballrooms in washington. it has the largest kitchen in washington. there is michael steele, former head of the republican national priebus, andince for those of you outside, maybe you heard, chris matthews' wife ran for congress. and opening senate nomination in maryland, she came in third in that race. there is bobby scott, a democrat and virginia and the congressman. and if you have comments and you would like to make them to the white house correspondents' dinner, go to our facebook page. there is a conversation going on , but also twitter. span is our twitter handle, or
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#whcd. use this is live coverage.
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♪ >> he spans live coverage of the white house correspondents' dinner continues. absolutely nobody is in there's heat, even the start time being two minutes. it will begin late, as it always does. there is a regular talkshow host and author for the press down there with his wife. a few minutes ago on your screen, one of the actresses that is here attending this dinner, she attended the google hbo party last night, which is associated with this dinner. >> we are joined by gabrielle union. what are you looking forward to
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tomorrow? >> i am looking forward to marry will more. i am very -- larry willmore. >> you send him any . >> i like a little inappropriate humor at the white house. >> is this your first dinner? >> my first one. and herrry washington husband, the cast of "scandal," is great being here. i can leave now and be very very happy. >> what does the rest of tonight look for you? concert,e jazz
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tomorrow, maybe "vanity fair," afterwards. >> gabrielle union is an washington, d.c., and her husband is flying in for the miami heat. [indiscriminate chatter]
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05 p.m., officially 8: and it has not officially started yet. playing, and ad drum major directing the band tonight. when the pre-dinner begins, you will hear from carol lee of "the washington journal." and you will also hear the national anthem, and hear from the air force director.
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then they will have dinner, and then the speeches and highlights of the evening, the president, larry wilmore, scholarships, things that are being given out. a lot of things coming up ahead. withpast week, we talked lieutenant colonel jason feddic k. here is what he had to say about the history. areur records indicate that first performance at the white wase correspondents' dinner about 10 years after it started, in 1931. we performed relatively sporadically after that, and for so, we had years or a regular appearance there each and every year, but music has always played an important role at the white house
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correspondents' dinners. there were always performances, prior to being comedians at the -- as the host, there were always great musicians, at the featured dinners throughout the 20th century. and there has always been a strong military component -- music component. it has always been a central part of the musical tradition of the dinner to have military music, as well. band hase marine corps about 130 members, rarely do all 130 play at the same time. i think they have about 50, 55 here this evening. we did find out also, the are notof the band would you consider normal marines. the sergeant major is, but the other ones don't have to go
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through boot camp. they have been chosen because of their musical abilities. 's live coverage of the white house correspondents' dinner at the it haston hilton hotel, weekend, lots a of affairs. many parties go along with this. the dinner is like thanksgiving. and potatoesfing and desserts, and all sorts of other goodies they go with the turkey. it has become one of the highlights of the washington social world. here are some tweets we've been receiving this evening. , saturdayom andrew
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night, and i am watching the white house correspondents' singlelife. here is another, i have been taking many selfies here. someoneanother, could please tell c-span to balance the camera colors, so i am not watching a smurf convention? i can tell you, they are balanced, it is a blue room. the lights coming off the floor at the top of the ballroom are all in blue, too. that is why you are seeing what you are seeing. another says listening to the
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c-span commentators is painful. another says the commentary is exactly what you would imagine, and is delightful. coverage.span live [indiscriminate chatter]
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>> you can see the washington hilton ballroom called -- ballroom, feels pretty cramped when you get right in the middle. here is a map of all the tables. 261 tables are laid out. up here is the head table, where the president, etc., all fit.
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, that is 26, table 10 right there. working on close to 2700 people altogether. had last year, the president's angry translator, attending this year. director of health who said he was proud to represent nih at the white house correspondents' dinner. we spoke to him earlier on the phone. another tweets in, a bunch of rich, manicure, well-paid and popular performers. a self absorbed after party, too. jessica tweets out a picture.
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the only protester of the white house correspondents' dinner, sitting outside, wants to stop the venom and the vial -- and, president jokeshas some funny-ass indeed, his humor has been highly reviewed. most of the presidents have done some surprising things over the years. president bush had his body year, his wife spoke in for him one year. video touching on some of the issues during his presidency. republican ofr,
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colorado, there in the front. and they were at the hbo google party last night. mr. keegan and michael t, how are you? are you attending the dinner? >> i am, i am excited to see what transpires. we got crazy last year. >> are we back for a sequel? >> we are not. i get to sit down and have a dinner this year. >> you are you a guest of? >> i am of the yahoo! table. i must've done something for yahoo! and did not even new -- no i did it.
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>> every single bit of it has been positive. it was a highlight in my life. pleasure and surprise was how wonderful the president's timing was, that is what really got me. i am looking forward to what larry wilmore comes up with this year. it was a moment in time, and we did not know this was going to happen. we created this character to be a mouthpiece, we thought someone in fiction would help them, we did not know it would come to --lize very looking around the fdr room, it was amazing. he ran right in the room, gave me a hug. he said you have to keep it together. professional, let's be professional and here. it was a sublime experience. >> how was working with mrs.
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obama? she was the dot on the! excle was the dot on the amation point. it was terrific. >> thank you very much, have a nice weekend. that was last night, one of the several dozen parties associated now with the white house correspondents, there are several after parties, and even a brunch tomorrow. a goes on and on. says, i thought bernie hates the establishment and all the treats of the rich, we're that he would attend the white house correspondents' dinner. bernie sanders is there come the only presidential candidate who is attending. ted cruz is out in california, trump is not there.
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john kasich, have not seen him either. eastern time, 21 minutes past the time when this shindig should have gotten started, it rarely get started on time. you can see nobody has taken a seat. there are tabled in between all of these people here, and they are just gathered around the tables. at some point, they will begin. prior to this, the president and mrs. obama and prior presidents as well, hosted a reception with white house the correspondents' association. currently on the board, representatives from thompson, new yorkbloomberg, times, fox, and of course "the wall street journal." privatehaving a
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reception with president and mrs. obama. this is a chance to talk with them one-on-one. larry wilmore will also be there. he brought his parents with him dinner. he has never met the president before. he will be doing entertainment after the president. sometimes it is hard to follow the president because he is really good at this. dinner. last year, when keegan-michael key and the president did there entertainerollow-up was despond and after the fact, because they were pretty strong entertainment. megyn kelly of fox is at the dinner, talking with the vice president or it -- vice president. this is a heavy security event, as you can imagine. everyone has gone through the metal detectors, have their bags had to have a ticket,
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a $300 ticket to get in, as well. if you want to participate in , if you twitter , or join the discussion on facebook.com. they have made the call for everybody to take their seats, and nobody is. bob hope, danny thomas, the disneyland golden horseshoe review have been here in the past. ♪ >> ladies and gentlemen, please
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applaud the president of united states and the first lady, michelle obama. ♪ ♪ [applause] >> ladies and gentlemen, please stand. ♪
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>> halt.
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♪ [applause] ladies and gentlemen, seated at the head table this evening todd gilden, margaret from a representative from carol lee from "the wall street journal."
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tonight's guest host, larry wilmore. and julie from "the associated press." [applause] >> ladies and gentlemen, please welcome carol lee. good evening, welcome to the white house correspondents' dinner, we have a great program ahead, but for now, please enjoy your dinner.
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>> and the president is seated lee andkaroly -- carol another.
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heard a couple of interesting facts about the dinner. is, while the secret service is back in the kitchen, the president is served randomly. so we are not breaking any confidences by telling you that. there will be somebody from the white house serving the president, not one of the hilton servers. there are about 200 hilton servers in the dining room tonight. and there are about 200 back in the kitchen working on tonight's dinner. this is, just another event for the hilton. they often have events on the same day, so they will have to have the ballroom set, broken down, the meals cooked, and prepared for the evening. so this is not unusual for the hilton to have a dinner of this size. they are course having, which hopefully has been
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served by now, scallops with mousselline, and caramelized corn and cream. a petite filet of sole, filet,k confit accompanied by asparagus, and zucchini, and roasted peppers. dessert, aert, -- tapas. along with mini french pastries and macaroons. here comes the wine. the wine selections are franciscan estates chardonnay and cabernet sauvignon, both out of the napa valley.
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it is fun to watch the president talked to one of the servers there. health and they have been working this dinner for many, many years. in fact, the woman who was in charge of the head table for many, many years just passed away. i believe her name is anna. she was in charge of the head table, and ran a pretty tight ship. both the chef, andre, who we spoke with earlier, was a little about that fact. she had been running that head table for a long time. see the marine band anymore, they are packing up and leaving. they are done for the evening. will pack up and get out of there, they're part of the
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entertainment is over. by tables are being served 200 front-line people tonight. overan see carol lee there, the white house correspondent for "the wall street journal," and also, a longtime columnist on the other side. we had talked about her role. is it difficult at the "wallpondent for the street journal," to be the dinner partner, after talking about isis policy? >> not at all, that is what we do every day. that is our role. understandingual that we can have a dinner, and have some tough questions.
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that is what all these white house correspondents' dinner. -- white house correspondents do. it should not impact how you question them, or the critical angle at how you look at how they are doing. >> back live at the washington hilton. the 102nd annual white house correspondents' dinner.
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>> we received a tweet, are we actually going to watch people eat for an hour and wonder what they are talking about? yes. program is the one that everyone is probably looking forward to. you will hear from the
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president, larry wilmore, you will see the scholarships being given. biden.f tweets about joe vice president joe biden on the stream, we were wondering if he was giving out his private number two somebody there. another twitter, i just tuned in to the white house correspondents' dinner, never have seen one of these before. when do they do the jokes? is due to start at 9:45, it will probably start a little late. hud, aretary of congressman from san antonio, we saw them a minute ago. robert tweets in, will wonders never cease? i am watching live feed of
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people sitting around, pretending to be doing something. people in the ballroom tonight having their dinner, lots of events associated around the white house correspondents dinner now. ons of parties going throughout this week. after those was the sag varietyponsored by sag and "the washington post." it is an entirely different world from when i started going to these. i am datinged, and myself, i won't tell you how long ago it was, i was usually one of four or five women at the dinner, period. it was much smaller, for correspondence and their
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sources. it was not for hollywood people, they did not come at all. ,he most interesting non-obvious person that came that i remember is jimmy hoffa. you could say he is sort of a source, i guess. days wereks in those very rich, and had very lavish spreads. the dinner was half the size or less, maybe 800 people at most. i made it a habit to never drink it was a pretty inebriated dinner. i was one of the only women, and one of two or three young women. >> how does that compare to now? now, it is a function of
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hollywood agents who book their , and say,heir actors would you like so-and-so at your table? a glitterati event as a journalistic event. there are elements of it that but the whole purpose of it initially was to take somebody with you who had helped you a lot over the course of time, or that you wanted to get to know better. and to take them to an enjoyable, insider event. --is now a humongous somebody asked me what you wearing tomorrow night? and i said, something that will take where in terror -- wear and tear. because it is a zoo. we are packed into the ballroom.
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i always like to see the last year of a presidency. evening, and the there are after parties, i have never been invited to "the vanity fair," party. i am tired, i usually park my car early in the hotel, go to some pre-party outside of the hotel, and then i go downstairs, get in the car, and drive home. and i fall into bed, no after parties for me anymore. i used to go to them. i don't think it is a commentary on me, i think it is a commentary on how many parties you can go to in one freaking night. >> will you have a guest of this year? >> i actually don't have a guess. are our funders, our charitable funders. in the old days, that would not have been permissible.
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they said you were not allowed to bring a lobbyists, for example. you had to bring a source, or nobody. i suppose, maybe i never worked for a big enough organization, maybe they had a way of getting an advertiser in? i never worked for one of the networks, maybe they got one in. at,at the tables i was there were always a lot of people who were sources. >> thank you very much. and there is nina totenberg in the red. if you were watching our coverage while we were speaking to her from last night, you saw defense secretary ash carter. and those of you with a careful eye could see nancy pelosi behind him. again, being blocked.
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years, there is been much entertainment. jay leno has entertained a couple times, ray charles is entertained, rich little, pollock poundstone, richard in 1968. chevy chase has performed there, frank sinatra, denny thomas, bob hope, several times. joe mckale, conan o'brien, jimmy kimmel, seth meyers, stephen colbert, got a little notoriety from his appearance there. wolf blitzer.
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wolf blitzer is sitting with rice previous -- priebus. [indiscriminate chatter]
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>> youriminate chatter] are watching c-span's live coverage of the correspondents dinner.
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now.are eating the entrée was just served. so, they program, the second 9:45.s due to begin at they may be on time once they get to the program. -- people sending out are sending out tweets. bill nye the science guy sent out this picture with karlie kloss. and this photo of bernie and jane sanders. finally, rachel mcadams sent .his photo of her at the dinner she got a reception prior to the dinner. and bernie and jane sanders are
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there. bernie sanders is not wearing a tux. he is a guest of cbs. you can see the different lighting in the room. the stage is a list for television. the room, not so much. 200 people are back in the kitchens. 200 people are working serving. we will continue to watch. if you would like to tweet, or comment on facebook, send a cd/et using the #wh . on oure conversation facebook page. there is michael bloomberg. has quite a presence here in washington.
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while we are waiting for the second half of the program, we will spend -- we have spent a lot of time going to the events associated with the white house correspondents dinner. there was a party last night posted by google and hbo. here is a little bit. foxe are joined by vivid a fox.vid coloca a >> since i got this invitation i have got my dress, my makeup, the whole nines. i'm looking forward to the
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fashion, the president and the first lady. >> is this your first dinner? >> this is my first. i am thrilled and honored to be here. barackut my campaign for twice. i knocked on doors, called, voted. a -- honor to for be here for a film like independence day: resurgence. it is just a wonderful experience. >> what else are you looking forward to? how busy is your evening tonight? been busy i have since 10:00 this morning. reception wethe got. we did an interview with fox
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news on the white house grounds. that was thrilling. and the i have brunch official dinner. >> will you meet the president? >> of course. i have been invented -- invited to a meet and greet with them. i have been a proud supporter of them for a long time. i met michelle at will and jay da's house. we celebrated black history month. hats off to them. i'm glad they are going to have a banging correspondents dinner. i will be in attendance. >> thank you very much. >> that was from last night. the feeding of the trough of power.
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says, "you know you are a nerd when you know it is exciting to stay home and watch. " last year patrick gavin put out a documentary called nerd prom. it is a look at the white house correspondents dinner. critical than a lot of the coverage. if you go to a search engine you , andearch patrick gavin nerd prom movie or documentary and get his point of view on things that he wanted to share. $86,000 in journalism scholarships are given out this evening by the white house correspondents . a nonprofit organization that works on accreditation for white
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house correspondents and access. the second half of the program, when they get started, at nine: 45 -- 9:45, it is due to begin. you will hear from the wall street journal, and you will see the scholarships being given out . the president and first lady are introduced. there is a toast in their honor. from that, you will hear the president and larry wilmore as well. this is c-span's live coverage. [indiscriminate chatter]
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>> a minute ago that was greta van susteren talking with former senator chris dodd. 's aid there on the far right. she is married to anthony weiner. valerie as well.
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and miss gayle king in pink. [indiscriminate chatter] >> and the former white house press secretary. that is jay carney. josh earnest replaced him. larry wilmore will be the final speaker this evening. there he is next to mrs. obama.
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we talked to him earlier this week about what to expect tonight. >> larry wilmore. you are going to meet the president. >> i'm very excited about that. -- now igive them can't vote. it's going to be a lot of fun. >> did you think about saying no? >> absolutely not. when the president calls you have to do it. it makes me think of medieval times like the court jester. if you don't perform you are going to get your head chopped off or something like that. it really is an honor. >> when did you start riding your material, your program? >> back in 1979. it. just going to wing
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no, of course i can't do it. maybe a month ago we started to get ideas together. i have a small team who will help me organize it. we have fun throwing ideas around to put it all together. it's getting pretty close. >> did you get any advice from the previous comedians? jon stewart, stephen colbert? >> they all said run and run quickly. why are you doing this? -- seth's show and we had a chat about it. stephen, they all sent us notes. haven't had a chance. i am a fan of theirs and have seen there's. -- theirs.
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>> in 2011 you did the congressional correspondents dinner. >> who plan that entire evening? i can't recall. that was a lot of fun. it was interesting because anthony weiner, as you recall, went out that night. it was a week later we learned the true meaning of anthony weiner. that is a blue joke for your c-span audience. >> we are cable. that is fine. >> it was funny. -- rand paul was on it also. he also ended up running for president. >> what is this like? >> it has been a bit surreal, doing a lot of interviews, realizing it is happening. for me it is part of the history of this -- it's a bit overwhelming. we are the same age.
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to see where race has gone in our lifetime, when i was a kid the thought of a black man leading a football team was a huge deal, let alone be president. for that to happen in my lifetime is pretty awesome. all those historical implications are very cool. >> what is the secret to playing a big room like this? >> the audio. you can't worry about how the jokes are rolling. they roll up in different areas. regardless of the reaction you have to pretend as if you are destroying, you are killing. who knows, you can't hear. the audio is terrible from your point of view. it is real wide. it is a wide room. it is hard to engage. you have to ignore it.
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here is what you want to do. you want to check and see if the president is laughing. that is the most important thing. >> are you going to make a weekend of it? >> i am heading back sunday. not quite. kind of a short weekend. >> is the family coming with you? >> my parents. my mother and father. they have never met the president. so it is exciting. >> will you be editing your remarks up until that saturday night? >> i will be editing them as i do them, believe me. that is part of it. i am just that way. i am nervous about whether the material is work -- going to work. many times i get ideas at the last minute. i have been known to scribble jokes before i go on.
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there will be difficult because i am sitting next to the first lady. say, firstant to lady, i'm trying to write a joe, could you stop talking? you have to engage when you can make notes and that sort of thing. >> have you rehearsed in the conversations? >> i had not even thought of that. that is a good point. i probably should. i could say horrible things if i am just talking like anybody. that is the first lady of the united states. i have to work on that. >> any suggestions? >> i'm just going to keep hiring the questions. you have to answer them. >> no advice from what to say to the first lady? >> give us a preview of what you're going to talk about. >> with the first lady? >> at the podium. >> i can't give away any jokes but let's say i will definitely
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bring up race. that will be an issue. i will bring up the presidential election. we will talk about some people in the room, obama's legacy, those are the big things. some of the big areas. >> this -- you are going to be big time. this is broadcast live on c-span. >> i know. absolutely. c-span is so big it doesn't need hd. [laughter] we are c-span. don't need it. people are going to watch anyway. c-span is. badass is also anlmore author. you are an executive producer. what are you -- what is your connection to black-ish?
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>> when we were producing the pilot i got the call to do this show. i wasn't able to finish the season. i worked with the creator of the show and had a great time. life.on his he and anthony anderson just were already a great collaborative team when i got there. i was more the executive producer helping them run it to shape it and put it together. what a treat, a great cast. you are generally regarded as a pretty nice guy. are there any topics that are off-limits? >> that is very nice. thank you for saying that.
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i am not a mean type of comic. i don't like attacking someone humor. and that be more sly type of thing. so, anything personal, i don't care about. it's more fun to do jokes and more clever ways. the other way of looking at it, it is a roast. --ple expect to get rid ribbed. roast is the best way to say it. you are roasting them in a good spirit. >> larry wilmore, the entertainment at the white house correspondents dinner, 2016. thank you for your time. >> thank you, peter. nice talking to you again. , 40,000 square feet of ballroom. most everyone is on their feet.
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the desert has been served. we saw that happening. served inof disturbe dessert ouse. -- m will smith earlier was talking with joe biden. you may have seen that if you were watching. we were showing you that interview with larry wilmore. larry wilmore also mentioned black-ish. tracy ellis ross and anthony anderson are at the dinner.
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that herossman tweeted would like to see joan rivers commentate. >> we have seen the senior white house adviser several times.
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she is a guest of cbs news. what are you looking forward to tomorrow? >> humor. wherea wonderful weekend the community comes together ,ith the business community artists from california and new york. it is all about having a good time. my expectation is that the president will be as funny as ever. our last correspondence dinner. has his approach changed at all? >> no. he tries to be goodhearted, have a little humor, usually at the , but alwayshe press with grace and humility.
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>> what other events will you be attending? >> i'm going to a range of events. it is a good chance to thank many people who support the , people whostration have been working with us over the last several years. it is a great chance for us to .ay thank you >> a few thoughts on the workition from west wing to socializing and events like these? >> our first priority is already a job. i have been here since 2009. it has been the biggest privilege of my career. to serve our country for a president who i respect and admire, it was an extra ordinary experience, but we are not done
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yet. i know the president wakes up every day focusing on what we can do to give every american the shop that they deserved. this is a pause to celebrate for a weekend, then back to work on monday. >> thank you very much. the president of the iationpondents' assoc talking with president obama. tweeted, is anybody going to recognize garry shandling as the first comedian to do the dinner? he was not the first, but he made a surprise appearance in 1989 during the george h.w. bush administration. paula poundstone was the first
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solo female comedian to host the dinner in 1992. in just a few minutes, the second half of the program will begin. carol the will make some introductory remarks. .hen, the president and then, larry wilmore. that is all planned for this evening. all live on c-span. if you want to join the conversation, you can go to or tweet us/cspan @cspan.
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seats, wetake your will begin shortly. >> i would like to invite michelle obama to the podium. [applause] ms. obama: we are going to wait
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until everybody sits down. [indiscriminate chatter] are making the first lady weight. ait. [applause] [laughter] the first lady has honored our scholarship recipients every year since 2009, and that has made this such a meaningful experience for them. thank you, mrs. obama.
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i would also like to invite jeff mason to introduce this year's scholarship winners. create athe charge to mentorship program that perez each of our scholars with the white house correspondent. he is going to make a terrific president next year. [applause] jeff: it is my honor to start reading the names of this year's winners. marcos martinez. [applause]
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[applause] jasmine goodwin. [applause] my you shall mille[applause] miles morore.
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[applause] jasmine monet ellis. [applause] misha youssef. [applause] molina.ana [applause] benson. [applause]
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andrew craigbaum. [applause] caleb o'brien. [applause]
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[applause] hi i jeff: congratulations to all of this year's winners. [applause] the firstou again to lady. awards to ae give knowledge of outstanding work that reporters have done. it is a moment that reminds us how valuable the freedom to practice journalism is. carol: one year ago, jason
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rezaian was in prison in iran. today, thanks to efforts by the president, secretary kerry, his colleagues at the washington post, and his family, particularly his brother, jason is free. [applause] like jason, many of our colleagues worldwide have suffered simply for doing their job. a journalist from bangladesh who is reporting on human rights and religion, putting him under threat from islamic extremists. his publisher was recently murdered. bangladesh to leave on thursday thanks to penn america and christi parsons and
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he is here tonight at our dinner. [applause] in 2015 alone, more than 70 journalists were killed for doing their job. 200 were imprisoned. these journalists remind is why we fight so hard for all the right to report, analyze, and criticize, without retribution or intimidation from those we are reporting on. this right is not only iteatened in obvious ways, is also threatened by laws and government officials that inhibit access to information, or intimidate specific journalists because they do not like what they report. by institutions that fight accountability. just ask the boston globe reporters who uncovered tickets of child abuse at the catholic church. that team is here tonight. [applause]
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we do not know who will be in the white house one year from now but the campaign has already underscored the importance of the press freedoms this organization has spent more than one century fighting for. and how imperative it is for us to continue to defend those rights which wednesday back to jason. we are honored that jason is here tonight, not only as a guest but also as a colleague who demonstrates why the freedom of press is critical. ladies and gentlemen, to give out our journalism award, please welcome jason rezaian. [applause]
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jason: thank you very much. ,his is an intimidating room but i can say that it beats solitary confinement. [laughter] [applause] i want to go off script for a moment and thank my colleagues in a journalistic community. you guys have been incredible throughout my ordeal. supporting me and my family. it means a lot to me, thank you very much. andnt to say to my brother
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my wife, i love them both very much. and my mom is watching on television, i think. [applause] the white house correspondents 1914, ison founded in dedicated to coverage of the president of the united states, proud to announce the winners of this annual award for distinguished print and broadcast journalism. of the marion smith award for outstanding white house coverage under deadline matt re is not visor -- visor of the boston globe. [applause]
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if the winner of the marion smith award for broadcast ofrnalism is nora o'donnell cbs news. [applause]
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the winner of the award for excellence in white house coverage, carol lee of the wall street journal. [applause] the edgar a poe award which recognizes excellence in coverage of events for
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investigative targets of regional or national interests will be shared this year by terrence mccoy of the washington john cushman junior, -- insighteyer climate news. congratulations. [applause] carol: congratulations to our winners and thank you again, jason. [applause]
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we have a couple of other guests here tonight. this is the first time in the last eight years that vice president joe biden is attending our dinner. [applause] the vice president is here with his daughter, ashley pyramid's device president, i can confidently say on behalf of reporters, we appreciate how much news you have given us. [laughter]
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we know this has been a difficult year for you and your family and we appreciate your presence here tonight. thank you. [applause] 70 years ago, frankie robinson became the first toican-american entertainer appear at the white house correspondents dinner. this piano playing prodigy was seven years old. here he is in 1946. mr. frank robinson, welcome back . would you please stand? [applause] i want to acknowledge some
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people who have been helpful to me and to the white house correspondents association. julia winston, thank you for everything you do. our lawyer,to george lehner. journalists on this stage have been strong advocates for our press corps day in and day out, at the white house not only doing their job reporting, but you will find them in josh earnest office arguing that it event should be open to the press or that the president should take more questions. we do this because we believe that more access from the more access the journalists have, the better informed the public will be. i am grateful to the wall street for the opportunity to cover the white house, particularly our washington
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bureau chief and our editor-in-chief, jerry baker. [applause] , many thankshere to them -- especially my parents hudson, probably upstairs ordering room service. i would like to think my other family, the white house press corps. i moved to washington eight years ago from a small newspaper in florida to cover the white house. i have had the pleasure to work alongside some of the smartest, funniest, kindest, and weirdest people i know. you know who you are. they are competitors but we collaborate, we speak the same , we spend more time with each other than with our colleagues at our news organizations, and often times more than our own families.
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could you please stand -- i want to thank you for the work that you do which i admire, and for just being her quirky, entertaining, fun, dedicated cells. thank you -- dedicated s elves. thank you. [applause] carol: obviously, this is president obama's last dinner while in office. , being thent enterprising reporters that we are, we wanted to give you something you can turn to have to you leave the white house and you miss having this around to record your every move. thank you for putting this together, let's take a look. [begin video clip] >> the white house
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correspondents association knows eight years of a presidency cannot be condensed into eight minutes or less and we will leave the legacy stuff to the press office. here we go. >> today, after all of the votes have been tallied, health insurance reform becaus becomesw in the united states of america. states has killed osama bin laden, the leader of al qaeda. -- >> the first government shutdown in 17 years is now over -- >> today i begin a new effort to fix our immigration system -- today, the united states of america is changing its relationship with the people of cuba -- >> today, because america negotiated from a position of strength and principle, we have stopped this part of nuclear weapons in this region --
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>> but it hasn't all been a smooth ride. ♪ [cheering] >> we cannot sustain -- wh oops. was that my --? sorry about that, guys. >> it hasn't all been smooth talk. smooth operator ♪ >> israel is a strong friend of israel -- >> john mccain has not talked about my muslim faith and you are absolutely right -- my christian faith -- >> on this memorial day, as our
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nation honors its unbroken line of fallen heroes, and i think many of them are in the audience here today -- us what r-tha told e-s-p-c-t ? ieshank you, sioux city's --sioux falls -- i just want to be clear -- >> i want to be absolutely clear -- >> let me be clear -- >> let me just be clear -- >> let me be as clear as i can be -- going to be a bright,
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son-shining day ♪ >> you were not so clear on who was who. >> first of all -- >> it is not lower, but you are saying 10. i completely understand. it is david today -- >> and then there was me -- >> i have not looked at the latest polling around the world, i do not know, garrett. no, garrett. >> when even fashion choices are scrutinized, including this one. pair ofeans, a sweet mom jeans -- nice mom jeans, obama. >> you will always have the audacity -- >> we should be addressing the country on such a serious matter and he looks like he is on his way to a party at the hamptons -- >> and scrutiny knows no borders. ♪
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, assumethe broadcasters the microphone is always on. >> ♪ this is why i'm hot ♪ he seems like a jackass. >> [indiscernible] you have game, even when you don't. you have a way of shaking it off. ♪
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shake it off, shake it off ♪ president, tell us how you really feel. hey! ho! ♪ ♪ >> ♪ baby it's alright! ♪ [applause]
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carol: mr. president, we appreciate your decision to attend this dinner every year. it shows that even if we do not always agree on our access, your administration -- we have a shared commitment to a free press. ladies and gentlemen, please raise a glass for what is, by tradition, our only toast of the evening, to the president of the united states. cheering] mr. president, the podium is yours. [applause] you are going to miss me when i'm gone ♪ [laughter] you can't say it,
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but you know it's true. [laughter] good evening, everybody. it is an honor to be here at my last and perhaps the last white house correspondents dinner. [laughter] you all look great. the end of every public has never looked better. [laughter] i do apologize -- i know i was a little late tonight. i was running on cpt. which stands for " jokes that white people should not make." [laughter] [applause]
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jeff. a tip for you, anyway. here we are. and final appearance at this unique event. iming excited -- i am excited. this material works well, i am going to use it at goldman sachs next year. [laughter] [applause] earn me some serious tubman -- that's right, that's right.
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my brilliant and beautiful wife michelle is here tonight. [applause] she looks so happy to be here. [laughter] that is called practice. it's like learning to do three-minute planks and she makes it look easy now, but -- next year, this time, someone else will be standing here in this very spot. guess who shes will be, but -- [laughter] [applause] standing here, i cannot help but be reflective. a little sentimental. eight years ago, i said it was time to change the tone of our politics.
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in hindsight, i clearly should have been more specific. [laughter] eight years ago, i was a young man. full of idealism and the vigor. and look at me down -- i am gray, grizzled, counting down the days. [laughter] hillary once questioned whether i would be ready for 3:00 a.m. phone call. now i am awake anyway, because i have to go to the bathroom. i am up. [laughter]
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in fact, somebody said to me, mr. president, you are so yesterday. justin trudeau has completely replaced you. he is so handsome, so charming, he is the future. i said, justin, give it a rest. [laughter] i resented that. meanwhile, michelle has not aged a day. [applause] the only way you can date her in photos is by looking at me -- take a look. 2008.e are in here we are a few years later. and this one is from two weeks ago.
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so, time passes. in just six months, i will be officially a lame duck. now willns congress flat-out reject my authority, and republican leaders will not take my phone calls. and this is going to take some getting used to -- it is a curveball. i don't know what to do with it. [laughter] course, in four months, congressional republicans have been saying there are things i cannot do in my final year. unfortunately, this dinner was not one of them. [laughter] but, on everything else, it is another story. and you know who you are, republicans. i think we've got tim scott and
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cory gardner in the house. which reminds me, security, bar the doors. out. mary garland, come on we are going to do this right here, right now. [applause] like the red wedding. [laughter] it is not just congress. some foreign leaders have been looking ahead, anticipating my departure. george showednce up to our meeting in his bathrobe. face.as a slap in the [laughter] [applause]
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protocol.each of although, while in england, i had lunch with her majesty the queen. i took in a performance of shakespeare, hit the links with david cameron to just in case anybody is debating whether i am black enough -- i think that settles the debate. [laughter] i will not lie -- look. this is a tough transition, it is hard. staff are starting to leave the white house. even reporters have left me. left to hostrie the today show. nora o'donnell left to host cbs this morning. left journalism to
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join cnn. [laughter] [applause] the prospect of leaving the white house is a mixed bag. he might have heard that somebody jumped the white house fence last week, but i have to give secret service credit, they found michelle and brought her back -- she is safe back at home now. [laughter] only nine more months, baby. [laughter] somehow, despite all of this, in my final year, my approval
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ratings keep going up. [applause] the last time i was this high, i was try to decide on my major. [laughter] [applause] here is the thing -- i haven't really done anything differently. even my aids cannot explain the poll numbers. nobody can figure it out. [laughter] puzzling. anyway. year, i do have more appreciation for those who have been with me on this ride. like one of our finest public
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servants, joe biden. [applause] god bless him. love that guy. i love joe biden -- i really do. i want to thank him for his friendship, his counsel, for always getting it to me straight and not shooting anybody in the face. thank you, joe. [laughter] host,give it up for our larry wilmore. [applause] also known as one of the two black eyes who is not jon stewart. you are the south african guy, right?
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i love larry. and his parents are here, who are from evanston, which is a great town. i also would like to acknowledge some of the award-winning reporters who we have with us here tonight. rachel mcadams, mark ruffalo, -- thank you all for everything you have done. i am just joking. as you know, spotlight is a movie about investigative journalists with the resources and the autonomy to chase down the truth and all the powerful accountable. the best fantasy film since "star wars." [laughter] that was maybe a cheap shot. i understand the news business is tough his days, he keeps
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changing all the time. every year, somebody makes a joke about buzz feed changing the media landscape. every year the washington post laughs a little bit less hard. [scattered laughter] gop chairman ryan previous is here as well. glad to see that you feel that you have earned the night off. on all of your success. the republican party, the nomination process, it is all going great. keep it up. [laughter] [applause] kendall jenner is also here.
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we had a chance to meet backstage at her and she seems like a very nice young woman. i and not exactly sure what she does? i am told that my twitter mentions are about to go through the roof. [laughter] helen mirren is here tonight. [applause] joke, i justhave a think helen mirren is awesome. [applause] [cheering] she is awesome. sitting at the same table, mike bloomberg. [applause] mike, a combated, controversial
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new york billionaire, is leaving -- leading the gop primary and it is not you. [laughter] that has to sting a little bit. it is not an entirely unfair comparison between you and the donald. mike was a big city mayor. he knows policy in depth, and he is actually worth the amount of money that he says he is. [laughter] [applause] what an election season. for example, we have the bright new face of the democratic party here tonight, mr. bernie sanders. [applause] there he is. [applause]
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bernie, you look like a million bucks. or, to put in terms you will understand, you look like 37,000 donations of $27 each. [laughter] a lot of folks have been surprised by the bernie phenomenon, especially his appeal to young people -- not me, i get it. young person said to me, she was sick of politicians standing in the way of her dreams. as if we were actually going to let melia go to burning man this year -- it is not going to happen. [laughter] bernie might let her go, not us. [laughter] i am hurt though, bernie, the
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you have distanced yourself for me. that's not something that you do to your comrade. [laughter] [applause] slogan has helped his campaign catch fire among young people -- feel the bern. that is a good slogan. hillary slogan has not had the same effect. let's see this. [laughter] i have said how much i admire hillary's toughness, her policy
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jobs, her experience. you have to admit it, though. hillary trying to appeal to young voters is a little bit like your relative who just signed up for facebook. america, did you get my poke? is it appearing on your wall? . am sure i am using this right love, aunt hillary." it is not entirely persuasive. meanwhile, on the republican more things are a little -- how shall we say this? a little more loose. look at the confusion over the invitations to tonight's dinner. check whether they wanted steak or fish, but instead, a whole bunch of you wrote in paul ryan.
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[laughter] that is not an option, people. steak or fish. you may not like steak or fish, but that is your choice. [laughter] meanwhile, some candidates are not pulling high enough to qualify for their own joke tonight. [laughter] the rules were well-established ahead of time. and then there is ted cruz. he has had a tough week. -- hoosierindiana country, stood on a basketball aurt, and called the hoop
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basketball ring. [laughter] what else is in his lexicon? baseball sticks? football hat? but sure, i am the foreign one. [laughter] [cheering] then they conclude on a more serious note. i want to think the washington press corps, i want to thank carol for that you do. the free press is central to our i am just-- nah, kidding.
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you know i am going to talk about trump! c'mon! [laughter] [applause] we weren't just going to stop there, come on. [laughter] although i am a little hurt he is not here tonight -- we had so much fun the last time. [laughter] surprising, you have a room full of supporters, celebrities, cameras, and he says no. is this dinner too tacky for the donald? what could he possibly be doing and said? eating a trump steak? tweeting insults to angela merkel? what is he doing? [laughter]
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the republican establishment is incredulous that he is there most likely nominee -- incredulous, shocking. they say donald he lacks foreign-policy experience to be president. in fairness, he has spent years meeting with leaders from around sweden, missss argentina, miss azerbaijan. [laughter] area where hene could be invaluable, closing guantanamo. because trump knows a thing or do about running waterfront properties into the ground. [laughter] [applause] alright, that is probably enough
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-- i mean, i've got more material -- no, no. [cheering] i don't want to spend too much time on the donald. following your lead, i want to show some restraint. because i think we can all agree that from the start, he has gotten the appropriate amount of coverage befitting the seriousness of th his candidacy. [laughter] i hope you are all proud of yourselves. to give his hotel business a boost, and now we are praying that cleveland makes it through july. [laughter] hm, hm. [laughter] hm. [laughter] and michelle, we have
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decided to stay in d.c. for a couple more years -- thank you. this is where our youngest daughter could finish high stayl, and michelle can closer to her plot or she has a ready made plans to see them every day -- take a look. [laughter] decision has actually presented a dilemma because traditionally, presidents do not stick around after they are done . it is something i have been brooding about a little bit. take a look. staying for's are two years after they leave office -- >> about to go from commander in chief to couch commander -- what am i going to do for two years? >> you have a real dilemma, mr. president.
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which do you like better, these are these? >> they are the same. need to focus here. >> mr. president, you have to be practical. .ou are going to need a license what are you volunteer and work for a sports team? >> i understand you are looking for some coaching help. let's just say i coach my daughter seen a few times. hello? hello? 44? >> finally. i thought i would take up driving again. >> what is the name? >> barack hussein obama. >> since he didn't have a license, you will need a birth certificat? e. >> really?
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it israel. -- it is real. oh, michelle left it at home. she's got snapchat. obamacare is great and it is really working, sign up now. michelle obama in our water after posting this video earlier today. >> obamacare is great and it is really working. [laughter] michelle obama: honey, when you just talk to someone who has been through this. i have to go to soul cycle. obama: she's right.
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can we get together? now that is a great move. can we get together? [said music playing] want to my advice? stop sending me all these links. you can just be yourself for a while. bes. obama: so i can just myself? yesterday, i had a beer at 11:30 in the morning. and mcdonald's for breakfast. michelle will be in spin class so she will never know. >> it will be long before you'll be able to walk right out of the zippity doo singing
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dah. you will have time to work on your tent. : and i got ama sweet deal on a chevy tahoe. >> we're here. we're here. pres. obama: yes. 347th round of golf for the year. it is totally great. think of a reason to care. i have tried. [applause] pres. obama: there you go. [applause] i am stillbama: waiting for all of you to respond to my invitation to connect to linkedin. and i know you have jobs to do, which is what brings us here tonight.
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there are times that we've had differences and that our institutional rules. industry of every president and his escort. shared the same goal, to route to our public discourse in truth and open the doors to democracy. we can to make our democracy and our world more free end of more just. and i have always appreciated the role you all have played as partners in reaching these goals. againress is why we once recognize the press covering the scandal and who brought some measure of justice to victims around the world. they are here tonight. matt, please give them a round of applause.
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[applause] pres. obama: our free is why once again we honor jason as carol noted. we spoke ofis year jason's courage as he endured the isolation of iranian prison. this year, we see that courage livingflesh and it is a testament to the very idea of the press and a reminder of level of danger faced by reporters overseas. this commitment that as long as i hold this office, my administration will continue to fight for the release of american journalist held against their will and we will not stop until they see the same freedom as jason has stop [applause] has. jason
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[applause] pres. obama: at home and abroad, journalists, like all of you who are in the docket pursuit of accountable,ens making our government of the people possible. enormous responsibility end i realize it is an enormous challenge at a time when the economics of the business sometimes incentivized been over and when controversy and conflict is what immediately attracts viewers. the good news is, there's so many of you pushing against ofse trends and as a citizen this great democracy i am grateful for that. around theo a time world when some of the fundamental ideals of liberal democracies are under attack and when notions of objectivity and free press and fact and evidence
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are trying to be undermined. and in some cases, ignored and harley. it is not climate, enough just to give people eight megaphone and that is why your is mored responsibility important than ever. notever is true does require you shutting your objectivity. in fact, it is the essence of good journalism. theffirms the idea that only way we can build consensus, the only way we can move forward as a country, the only way we help the world amended itself is by agreeing on a baseline of fact when it comes to the challenges that face us all. this night is a testament to all of you have devoted your life to that. to push, to shine a light on
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truth every day. want to close my final white house correspondents' dinner by saying thank you. proud of what you have done. it has been an honor and privilege to work side-by-side by you in our democracy. and with that, i just have two more words to say. obama out. [cheers and applause] ♪
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>> thank you, mr. president. when i met larry wilmore earlier this month to told me it was his dream come true to follow the present at the white house correspondents dinner. he did. he is the host of the comedy show on comedy central. ladies and gentlemen, larry wilmore. [applause] larry: thank you. thank you very much. they keep. thank you for keeping that a puzzling all the way, too. i appreciate that. to negro at night -- negro night here. report, twows would thugs interrupted elegant dinner in washington, d.c.
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here at the white house correspondents' dinner where as you know they will call hostst year, donald trump a luxurious dinner hosted by mexico. we are very scared of that. thanks a lot. it is an absolute honor to be on tonight. to thank the president. the correspondents association for hiring me and mitch mcconnell for not blocking my nomination. seriously, you have to give mr. credit.l he is the black lebron james. i am little bit about me, a black man who replaced a white man who pretended to be eight tv newscaster. so yes, and that way lester holden and i have a lot in common. but i have to admit, it is not easy to follow the president.
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you've got some jokes, mr. president. the president is funny. stay in your life, man. you don't see me going around all the time. passing health care, signing executive orders, not closing guantanamo. oh wait, maybe i did do that. great.ave to say, it is it looks like you are really enjoying your last your the president the. seth you hanging out with curry, golden state warriors. that was cool. make sense because both of you like raining down bombs on people from long distances. [boos] drugs, how isg of what lets are still on television?
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next i am ready to present winners. anyone in here in the situation room? [boos] wolf. sorry, i like joe biden is here. i hear he is moving back to delaware. he won't have to answer any difficult questions like, hey don't i know you from somewhere? but i have to say about the first lady, it is so nice to have dinner with you. of grace, academy class, hand boys. isn't she? she really is. not to be confused with future clinton,tleman bill whose three favorite girls are named -- strippers are named grace, class, and boys.
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say, mr. president, the office has taken its toll on you. you look terrible, mr. president. no, you do. look at you. your hair is so white it tried to punch me at a trump rally. the president's here is so white, he keeps saying, all lives matter. ok, fine. i get it. i get it. no, man, you came in here looking like denzel washington. you are going out looking like grady from sanford and son. dated, mr. president. all i am saying is that in less than eight years, mr. president, you busted to time-honored stereotypes. crack.do and apparently, once you do black it looks like we are going back to stop yeah.
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thanks, ben carson. i have to be careful picking on you, mr. president, a couple years ago during this dinner you were killing osama than lawton. who are you killing tonight? it cannot be journalism, that has been dead for a wild now, right? now.ur a while shout, they are old death knell. that follow-up was nice, wasn't it? relax, white people. it was a joke. just relax. i am impressed with the people in this room. there are so many rich, powerful people in this room. to finally match the names to the faces in the penama caper. it is nice. it is nice to see them together.
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samantha is here from the pcoming movie "suicide squad." not to be confused with the new jeb bush documentary, "suicide watch." anthony anderson is here from ish."it show "black which was also my nickname in high school. they called you, didn't they mr. president? c-span has caring this live. yeah. which is ironic because most of the viewers are not. it is true, guys. c-span is the number one network among people who died watching tv and no one found that met yet. no, but it is good to be on
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c-span. i am glad i am not on your rival hdmi-1.""no input that was for me. i have not watched cnn for a long time. i used to watch it back when it was a network. i don't know about you guys, but i cannot get enough of that cnn countdown clock. now we can see exactly when they hit zero in the ratings. [boos] a: and not to throw in a shape, thefox news network is highest rated network among viewers who do not know what "shade" means. beyondied to convince
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saying that miss america was anti-tops. come on. at most she is anti-pants. filejust renamed the keli "becky what the good hair." lemonade? lemonade, mr. president? ok. msnbc here tonight. now stands for "missing a significant number of lack ." respondents i heard they put chris hayes on probation because they thought he was related to isaac hayes. that is wrong. msnbc got rid of so many black people, i thought boko haram was running that network. what is going on?
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i should say, some of america's finest black journalists are here tonight. don lemon is here, too. hey, don. how's it going? alleged journalist don lemon, everybody. al sharpton i think was here tonight. is a hillaryd al supporter. you do not put a relaxer in your hair for 40 years and not feel the bern. it is impossible is what i am saying. next to alsitting sharpton, it is ok to feel the bern. we cleared it. promised to put harriet tubman on the $10 bill but now we have to wait until 2034 the $20 bill. yeah. women have not been this d.c. by
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a bill since cosby. [boos] a: oh, like i did it. ben carson praised andrew jackson saying he was a tremendo president. from the grave, jackson said, what did that jigaboo say? that is what he said. that is what he said. i am just reporting. i'm just reporting, mr. president. aboo"?rry say "jig i did. i honestly did. 2016 has been eight b. "b."
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we lost prince. or as hillary clinton says, my favorite singer, my favorite singer! and now -- is back to doing what he does best, manning the pottery booth at the craft fair. chris christie was supposed to be here tonight. he, his wife, and donald yours dry-cleaning. chris lost a lot of weight recently, didn't he? he said he eliminated everything from his routine that was not necessary. like his self pride hand dignity. -- and dignity. senator bernie sanders is here tonight. senator. i am surprised, you never come to these things. he usually goes to the white house early bird's correspondent dinner.
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he recently had a hernia operation. they say it is his own fault for the helps of the disenfranchised. you up to stretch before you do that, senator. confused on bernie sanders's stance on guns. he seems to be anti-gone everywhere except vermont. open --[ whispers ] there are no black people in vermont. been hanging around with mike. laura's hillary clinton calls him, super-predator might. bernie sanders gets knocked for his age which is kind of unfair. it has, isn't it? sanders's that bernie first campaign slogan was
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"fire." old, whenders is so god said "let there be light," arnie said, let's conserve energy and sit in the dark. but it is a tight race between senator bernie sanders and hillary clinton. hillary was flustered when a personives matter confronted her. i have not seen a white person be that upset about a black person since kelly ripa. hillary has had some awkward interactions with black lives matter. you know it is bad when her immediate responses, can't we talk about benghazi? please? in troubleers got for saying hillary clinton was unqualified.
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hillary is extremely qualified. -- when youtor factor in all of her policy flip-flops, she is one of the buzz qualified to ever run for president. donald trump said if hillary clinton were in man, he did not think she would get 5% of the vote. ok. all right. first of all, if hillary clinton were suddenly a man, her biggest problem will be trying to find a bathroom she can use in north carolina. right? donald trump, donald trump says he is going to try to be more presidential. it is true. he is serious about. he says that now when he talks about his genitalia during the debate he is only going to talk --.t it as his president i can't understand why everybody treats donald trump with kid
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gloves. then i remember they are the only gloves that will fit his stupid little baby hands. oh, man. actually, donald trump, his campaign is inspiring. man to violence. everybody turns on the tv, sees family -- sees trumps campaigning for him. have you seen morning joe? seriously. morning joe has their heads up ass so far, they bumped into chris christie. i'm not lying. you know that is true. donald trump looks like the rich dad in every episode of law and order where the frat kid
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accidentally strangles a curveball's top dozen tea -- where the frat kid accidentally strangles a hooker. not surprised donald trump is happening to america because i watch movies. i do. every time there is a black president, something always comes to the story that hurts. always. it is true. ted cruz is about to stay in the race. man, everybody hates ted cruz. even oj simpson says, that guys just hard to like. this is true. this is true. there is a general and run the cruz is that ted actually the zodiac killer. i am not making that up. that is absurd.
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some people actually liked the zodiac killer. a string ted cruz got of wins and endorsement and then everybody remembered who ted cruz is. the zodiac killer. ted cruz got zero delegates in new york, which is actually five more than i thought he would get for the zodiac killer. john boehner came out of described tedand cruz as lucifer in the flesh. lucifer. that is not there. that is not fair, lucifer is horrible but he is not the zodiac teller. heidi cruise revealed that after they got married, ted bought something like 100 cans of soup. not making your self look less
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like the zodiac killer, ted cruz. i don't even think ted cruz wants to be president. all right, that is enough. ted cruz actually announced that carly uribe as his vice presidential pick. and he is not even a nominee at. you see this, right? who does that? except the zodiac killer. no, but see. think how strange it is. vice president? that does not make sense because their own colors always work alone. if you thought about this, but if carly fiorina were vice president, she would only be a hard eat away from being zodiac killed. away from being zodiac killed.
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mr. president, you have seven months left and we should enjoy every moment of it. soak again, people. i don't know when were getting a black resident again. i mean, they will not even let morgan freeman be president and movies for a while anymore. is going to be different for you guys. nobody to wash the dishes or change the bed linens, sleep the floors. you are going to miss joe biden. i just got a note for the president say, if you want another drink you better order now because the bartleby closing down. of course, they said the same thing about guantanamo so you have another eight years. he made that joke. just think, mr. president. less than one year, you will be playing golf every day.
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things can't be that much different. this is your last year in office, right? so your legacy begins. some want to talk about when you're leaving behind and i don't mean the black jesus in the lincoln bedroom. make sure you take all of your culturally specific items with you so you can get your security deposit back, mr. president. quick impression of the next president moving in, "what is cocoa butter?" i have to say, what it is all said and done mr. president, after eight years in the white house, we are really going to miss michelle. we really are. thank you for being a good sport, mr. president. all jokes aside, let me just say
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how much it means for me to be here tonight. i voted for the present because he is black. i agree with the policy that he is black. he seems black, i am good. they say, what about iraq? i say, is he still black? but behind that joke is a humble appreciation for the historic implication for what your presidency means. when i was a kid, i lived in a country where people could accept a black quarterback. about that. and black man was brought by his mere color not good enough to lead a football team. your time, mr. president, when a black man can lead the entire free world -- [applause] larry: words alone it me no
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justice. so, mr. president, i am going to say, yo barry. nigger.it, my it.did thank you very much. thank you. [applause] >> thank you all for coming tonight. i hoped you enjoyed it. president of the association will now escort them out.

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