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time, it's called bulls and bears right here on fox business. i'll be back tomorrow. guess who's in for kennedy? mr. guy benson is here tonight for kennedy. we look forward to seeing him. thanks for watching. ♪ ♪ >> well, what many saw as a wake-up call for sleepily e joe -- sleepy joe ended up being a wrong number. good evening, i'm guy benson in for kennedy tonight. a monmouth university poll released earlier this week, or you'll remember this, lots of critics and supporters wondering could biden's gaffes finally be catching up to him, a statistical three-way tie we bernie sanders and elizabeth warren. the former vp's campaign brushed off any concerns calling the survey an outlier, and today the pollster agreed, quasi-renouncing their own poll with this statement saying in part, quote: it's clear that the monmouth university poll is an
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outlier, this is a product of the uncertainty that is inherent in the polling process. fair enough. biden also got a bounce from two brand new polls fortifying his front-runner status. a quinnipiac poll showing biden firmly leading the pack with 32% followed by warren at 19 and sanders at 15, kamala harris at 7%, pete buttigieg and andrew yang the only other candidates holding above 1%. meantime, with just a few hours left before tonight's deadline, only ten candidates are likely to qualify for the next democratic debate on september 12th; cory booker, beto o'rourke, amy klobuchar and julian castro joining the cases on stage.
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sad news tonight, kirsten gillibrand and her desperate attempts by offering t-shirts for $1 donations were all in vain. the new york senator announcing she's dropping out of the race after failing to meet the criteria for the third debate. president trump reacted by tweeting: a sad day for democrats, kirsten gillibrand has dropped out of the presidential primary, i'm glad they never found out he was the one i was afraid of. [laughter] here to break it down, an all-star party panel, and let's get started with republican strategist alexandra wilkes, author of panic attack, robbie suave, and someone else with pointy hair, it is comedian and head writer of in this show, jiy fela. >> i'm the ghost of robbie future. if he lets himself go -- how horrifying is that?
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maybe drink a little less, you know? [laughter] >> you want to look like this? >> an amazing product. jimmy, the burning question on everyone's mind, there are roughly 7-8 supporters of kirsten gillibrand in the country. where do they go? >> this is a quick chance for beto to double his support up to 14. [laughter] you know how hard al franken is laughing right now? because he hates her. let's not forget what a garbage person she's been in the last year, reversing just about every person. i'm glad it's over. i am -- i think it's also refreshing that joe biden is in first place, because for once he knows where he is, which is delightful. last week he called manchester vermont, vice versa. to the point of the intro, i said this in 2016, and it should be said repeatedly, i don't believe polls are there to
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report opinion, i believe they're there to shape opinion. and a poll like that that had a margin of error of 12% -- >> i think it was 6%. it's a huge margin of error, but this is why, alexandra, people who are professionals in the polling realm always tell you don't get too excited about one data point. >> definitely. and especially that's true for this election cycle coming up where there was so much uncertainty we the polling in 2016. when a poll comes out like this that is news-making, that is shocking in some ways, there really, i think, is an attempt to explain it especially if it is an outlier like this. that being said, i think what we've always known to be true about joe biden is his status as a front-runner is, you know, it's definitely a position that's on fragile ground. you know, he has only, you know, room to fall rather than to grow in that position. and so i think that now the
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debates are consolidated, this reminds me of 2016 when we were thinking about, you know, are the candidates going to go after donald trump to try to, you know, strengthen the whole pack or go after each oh to get concern each other, we'll see how that status withholds. >> so, robbie, i think something jimmy said is interesting about whether polls are here to show us opinion or to shape it? i did get the sense in certain precincts of the media that they were very excited about the monopoll. they wanted it to be -- monmouth poll. it's more exciting, i think they all love war. >> no question that people in media, think tanks, policy, opinion shapers, love warren and wish she was doing better. i think it's interesting that she's not really doing better because the media can't get her over the line, but people just love biden. and no one is really fighting him for the kind of moderate vote which there is way more moderate democratic voters, and
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all of them are competing for the votes of the most far left progressive person, and so they're splitting that vote six ways, and it's not a surprise that biden's going to walk to finish line or limp or get wheeled n. i don't know. >> it's risky though, because you can't run around telling people we should invoke the 25th amendment and then elect a guy in his late hundreds. >> biden did, earlier today, seem like he had forgotten the name of barack obama, which is the only thing he should really remember. [laughter] that one talking point. >> regardless, right, they're all old. there's no other -- >> we're going to talk more polling because it's all the hotness. today's quinnipiac poll might be good news to grandpa joe, but it'll be treated as fake news by the president. according to the numbers, all five democratic candidates beat the president in a hypothetical matchup. you can see biden holds a whopping 16-point lead over the president, bernie sanders leads by 14 points, warren by 12,
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harris by 11 and even buttigieg by 9. it's very, very early, these numbers aren't that useful but still. the president will like he reject all those figures, like he's already dismissed his republican primary challengers. earlier this week former illinois congressman joe walsh joined former massachusetts governor bill weld in declaring their candidacies for the gop nomination with former south carolina congressman mark sanford also debating a run. the president laughed off their efforts tweeting: can you believe it? i'm at 94% approval in the republican party and have three stooges running against me. one is mr. appalachian trail who was in argentina for bad reasons -- an affair, which is something trump would never endorse -- [laughter] another is a one-time bad congressman in illinois, the third is a man who couldn't stand up straight while receiving an award. i should be able to take them. that last one is a drunkenness joke by the president who is clearly not worried about his
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republican challengers. but should he will concerned at all about the democratic polls, alexandra, that we're seeing here? as i said, meaningless at this stage, but those numbers are big for the democrats. >> it's certainly early, but i don't think that you have to be a rocket scientist here to figure out that donald trump needs young people, and he needs suburban voters, suburban women in particular, to win this election. is so i think that, you know, that's where you're seeing sort of the depression this these polls, is in these groups. these are groups, by the way, that supported him in 2016, more than they have republican nominees in the past. so he has the ability to go out and capture them, and i think what this is really going to come down to is getting a democratic nominee, because elections are about contrast. right now we have donald trump against an amorphous collection of a crazy ideas ranging from moderate to woke. >> robbie, the q poll that we've been talking about here, look at these head to heads, i wonder if the media's making the exact
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same mistake that many people did -- we were just talking about the monmouth poll. here's one really bad survey for the president, and we're hyping those results because it's bad for trump. >> at the 2016 polls trump looked doomed versus hillary. this will narrow as we get closer to the election, and the conditions a year from now will matter a lot. if the economy is very strong, people feel hike they're doing well under trump's policies, that will speak highly of him. if the economy's doing very badly because we've gone into this trade war with china, that could hurt him. i don't know. >> is jimmy, i want to talk about the last part of the tweets, the stooges? >> yeah, yeah. >> the three stooges? some would say that the president should not be punching down at people who are going to garner 1 or 2% in the polls, but i think ultimately this guy loves a foil, he loves a fight, and i'd rather him going a after
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people challenging him than after the chairman of the fed. [laughter] >> i'm glad we have these distractions. all three of these bozos, nowhere in their minds do they have any chance of winning. this is a scaramucci strategy 101 where people desperate pick a fight with the president. to the point about this poll being an outlier -- and it shows buttigieg beating trump by nine points. buttigieg is at 0% in the black community. there are more black people at a jimmy buffetten concert than a pete buttigieg rally, and this poll has him up by nine points. it's absurd. and we're back to where we were in 2016. it's like we're giving money to a doomsday preacher the day after the apocalypse didn't happen, you know? why rewe listening to the polls right now? it's absurd. >> let's are invoke a serious, adult voice in the room. james mattis has mostly kept
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quiet since last december, but he penned an op-ed in the "wall street journal," some see it as a jab at the president's foreign policy and leadership style. quote: nations with allies thrive, those without them wither. alone america cannot protect our people and our economy. at this time we can see storm clouds gathering. a polemicist role is not sufficient for a leader. a leader must display strategic acumen that incorporates respect for those nations that have stood with us when trouble loomed. mattis, who resigned over a disagreement with the president, also slammed the broader state of american politics saying our, quote: internal divisiveness concerns hymn more than our -- him more than our external adversaries. is he right to speak up? jimmy, mattis also wrote this: we all know we're better than our current politics. are we though? >> no.
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[laughter] i say this all the time because people always say, oh, donald trump, the american people didn't deserve this. sure, we did, we absolutely did, because we made this climate where it was possible, you know? and i do feel for mattis. >> look how sip call i've become -- cynical i've become in my old age. [laughter] you really went downhill. it's true, we've gotten to this horrible place, and i feel bad for mattis because he was the adult in the room. >> yeah. >> and was the guy who really did want to put a shock collar on trump and kind of rein him in a little bit. >> i do have to stick up for trump's foreign policy. i respect mattis, i like his temperament, but i agree with trump on withdrawing troops from the middle east, with talking to north korea. that was a break from kind of traditional, more hawkish foreign policy that i think the american people wanted and trump knows they want, so -- >> i want you to handicap for me, if mattis ran for president, let's say it's warren and trump
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and mattis is, like, i'm in, where does he factor in? >> i think he would get probably some support but, in the end, not very much. >> more or less than 10%some. >> oh, less. it's a binary choice for people. even when we want them to be open minded, it always comes undown to a binary -- >> how great would mattis be against marianne williamson? >> alex, one thing i think is predictable from the media is they are reading between the lines of the mattis op-ed, and they're making it all about trump. and i think there are some critiques of the president buried in there, but it is much broader than that. he is going after polarization and the otherring of people with political disagreements on both sides, yet with the blinders on. look at these shots at trump, they're missing a much bigger picture, i think. >> this is a plague on both houses here in terms of the incivility and, you know, is sort of the hyperbole that we
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see in our political culture right now. and, you know, i think for a lot of republicans it's hard to remember a time before donald trump, what it was like to be a conservative. and i was reminded of this recently after -- >> four years ago. [laughter] >> but, you know, after the unfortunate shootings in dayton, ohio, sherrod brown, the senator from ohio, gave a conference with the mayor of dayton, and somehow in that press conference he mentions to put in there that george bush lied about iraq. and i was transported instantly back to this place of being a younger conservative and having to fend off those attacks of people accusing the commander in chief of lying about sending, you know, young men and women into war. so i think that, you know, this started long before president trump, it's going to continue after him, and the democrats are as much to blame, if not more so so -- >> well, crying wolf for decades -- >> exactly. >> and when you make mitt romney into history's greatest monster and then, like, trump --
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[inaudible conversations] >> how about mitt romney is going to put african-americans back in chains. >> right. and the only thing he's ever chained was his dog to his roof on a family road trip. >> hardly the same offense. >> seamus romney. >> that was not an e-mail i was expecting to have on the bingo card. [laughter] american farmers make up a big chunk of president trump's base, but they're feeling the brunt of his trade war with china. will the president's ongoing battle with beijing ultimately test their loyalty e? could it end up costing him next year's election? jonathan hoenig, there he is, he's doing some math for us next. ♪ ♪ ♪ limu emu & doug and now for their service to the community, we present limu emu & doug
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♪ ♪ guy: president trump's trade war with china snowballing, and many americans may finally be turning on the yearlong tariff battle. a new poll found that for the first time since he was elected, more americans think the trump economy is getting worse than better, 37% have a bleak outlook while just 31% believe the future to be rosy. even worse, it's a key part of trump's base. farmers in the midwest who are getting hardest hit by the trade war. china's retaliatory tariffs have
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cut deeply into revenues of soybeans and pork. sonny purr dee saying trump -- sonny purr dee is saying -- >> the moment that those delegates, the talks with china broke down, the president was on the phone with me early the next month r morning and said, sonny, bring me a program. we're going to do the market thing again this year, and as you know, it's $4 billion more. you're right to acknowledge that's not to going to make anybody whole. guy: so are a bunch of sub city eties for farmers going to keep them in president trump's corner? fox news contributor jonathan hoenig, first of all, go caps on saturday at stanford -- [laughter] beat the cardinal. >> yes, yes. great to be with you. guy: please break down and walk us through the economic risks and the political risks that are also involved.
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>> certainly, the president's real forte has always been thegy, guy. that's been his calling card. and as you said, for the first time since the election, that seems to be going away. a majority of american voters believe the economy's getting worse, particularly as you said amongst his really stalwarts of his support, the farming community. and it's not surprising why. soybean farmers have seen their exports go down by about 75% over just the last year, and sonny per due mentioned bailouts, there's been 240 farm bankruptcies this year, and that's despite two bailouts just last year. so a lot of the warning signs are starting to appear. no matter what side of the aisle you are, it's affecting the farmers and even starting to affect consumers here as well. it's simply not working. guy: you're going to hear quotes from people in the news, some unions saying this is really hurting us, but if you look at polling of farmers, nearly 80% of american farmers in the
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midwest support president trump, 78% of u.s. farmers said e the trade war will ultimately benefit u.s. agriculture. so some of the people bearing the brunt still have faith in the president and think t going to work out longer term. >> yeah. and that might be a positive strategy, guy, although, you know, as the tariffs program expand, as some of the retaliatory tariffs start to expand, we could start to see these impact people even beyond the farmers. for example, macy 's has started raising prices on home wares, on toys and luggage, for example, companies we know have paid billions is and billions of dollars in tariffs. and jpmorgan has estimated this could cost the average household about $3,000. you're going to start to see more and more effects on everyday americans -- $1,000. guy: i've heard democrats belly aching about this, but i've seen no movement in the
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democrat-controlled house on usmca, right? so maybe we can make good with the canadians and the mexicans, but nancy employees city 's just sitting on that bill. >> yeah. any move towards bring some of this uncertainty to an end, guy, would be a major advantage. think about -- forget even the big investor. the small investor trying to look 5, 10, 15 years out let a alone the farmer, almost impossible to do. so my advice to the president ought to be to take a lesson from the bushes, both sr. and jr. you know, president bush sr. was only a one-term president because of that weak economy. and, guy, as you remember, george bush jr. enacted steel tariffs back in 2002. he got rid of them 18 months later because, in fact, they were having a detrimental impact on the steel and aluminum industries. you could see the same reversal if the president calls off the trade war. guy: that actually might be an asset for trump vis-a-vis china,
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but for american investors and employers, not so much. jonathan, thank you, as always. what is it with democrats and bad cooking videos on social media? just days after beto o'rourke proved he has no idea to cook a cheeseburger, aoc one-ups him. the panel returns with reaction to that next. ♪ ♪ -and...that's your basic three-point turn. -[ scoffs ] if you say so. ♪ -i'm sorry? -what teach here isn't telling you is that snapshot rewards safe drivers with discounts on car insurance. -what? ♪ -or maybe he didn't know. ♪ [ chuckles ] i'm done with this class. -you're not even enrolled in this class. -i know. i'm supposed to be in ceramics. do you know -- -room 303. -oh. thank you. -yeah. -good luck, everybody.
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[laughter] guy: she also claimed that glaciers are filled with diseases that might kill us all, but perhaps the most startling ingredient was her take on today's college students and young people. >> i think this new generation is very profound and very strong and very brave because they're actually willing to go to the streets. how about that? like, previous generations that just assumed that, you know, government's got it. guy: how about that? [laughter] i have the 1960s online two. does aoc have her own cooking show or is one hell's kitchen enough? panel is back, alex, robbie, jimmy. let's begin with robbie here. casual doom and mac and cheese on a tuesday night, what's up with this claim? she also saided in the said owe that we didn't play that today's younger generation more informed -- [laughter] than anyone else in the past. and i'm not quite sure -- >> what if the glaciers have
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dinosaurs' blood in them, and we bring them back, and they wreak havoc? that could happen. >> on an island? >> so all activists have to say this, you have to say you can't sleep because of your activism. you're waking up in the middle of the night with panic attacks, because that's how you prove you're truly dedicated to the cause. if you were able to have a normal day and not think about how doomed the planet is, they would say you weren't serious. it's true. they all compete to be more triggered -- guy goi i like that you just slid in the title of your book there. [laughter] very well done. also my e brain is very strained, so i'm thinking jurassic park, you know, an island in a warm climate. i do believe this is an island now available in the u.s. virgin islands, and it's like bringing in a different news -- i'm getting a little bit concerned. >> yeah. guy: alex, i want to talk about the political impact of these videos. a lot of people like to make fun of her on the right, but is it
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effective to do these type of instagram lives? it seem like she's acceptable and relatable. do you disagree? >> well, we're talking about her now. she knows what she's doing. she's not simply making mac and cheese so she can lean into the garbage disposal privilege that she talked about earlier this year. she's using the light moments to talk about heavier issues, and i think that is relatable to a younger audience. and i think for, you know, for an older audience that has a difficult time for digesting that, no pun intended, it drives them crazy e. and then we talk about it, and she gets exactly what she wants. she gets the younger people to look at what she's doing, is and she gets the older people riled up and to say nasty things. guy: jimmy, aoc. go. >> i do believe she's concerned about climate change. we need to change the climate back to 68 degrees, the way i like it. the your point, it is effective in that it does communicate and
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connect with people well, but i don't know that these are people that are going to vote, and i don't know that -- like, i always laugh about this because it's, liking when you watched the claims she was making on, you know, inns gram and all of that stuff, it does speak to the fact that we are more informed as a generation, but it doesn't mean we're properly informed. 80% of them are getting their news and information off memes and bumper stickers. guy bye and this. >> even worse. it's good information. guy: that's because we all have smartphones, and you can google anything at the drop of a hat. but then people don't actually learn stuff. >> nothing. guy: all right. meanwhile, dave chapelle's new netflix special includes jokes about school shootings, r. kelly, michael jackson and the me too movement. and if that weren't enough to make the culture warriors mobilize, he also went here. >> duh.
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hey, if you do anything wrong in your life are, duh, and i find out about it, i'm going to try to take everything away from you. and i don't care when i find out. today, tomorrow,15, 20 years ago, if i find out -- >> [inaudible] >> who's that? that's you! [laughter] guy: the best part about the clip is he's doing this impression. he's like, who is it? people are screaming, it's trump. he's like, no, it's you. and they're like, huh? you. [laughter] dozens of web sites warning their viewers not to watch it, just skip the whole thing. it's not funny. netflix issuing a statement saying they don't condone chapelle's views, but they stand by his right to free speech. it makes dollars and makes sense. is he right to say that the whoa crowd needs to take a nap? let's start with alex. [laughter] i saw a lot of people on twitter
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woke, mostly white progressives, saying this is absolutely not funny, and people should not watch it. i'm, like, this has to be funny. [laughter] these people would rather not laugh. >> i totally agree. these people on twitter have absolutely made it certain that i'm going to watch this show now. look, i think there is a difference between appreciating comity as a whole and finding some jokes to be in poor taste and literally saying it needs to be canceled, that you need to remove it from the public discourse because you can't handle it. guy: some of the jokes are in very poor taste. that's part of comedy. >> it makes you -- he's a provocateur. he makes you uncomfortable because that's what comedy does. guy: it's across the board. >> he makes fun -- i watched it twice. he makes fun of pro-life and pro-choice people. the left will only praise him so long as he's mocking the right, things that conservatives believe.
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oh, no, he's sullying, tarnishing his reputation. guy: what's the thing, jimmy, and i've been seeing now, like, these think pieces about how laughter and humor isn't indispensable to good comedy because what matters more is the broader picture and, you know, cultural commentary -- >> you actually read the reviews on netflix. [laughter] nobody laughs once. it's, like, $10 to get in and $50 to get out. guy: the best show of the year, you've got to see it! >> yeah, because it's woke and it's garbage. you were going to a safe space where it was safe to say things you could not say in polite society. and the reason these people are just scum to me, just the bottom of the bottom, is when guys like dave chapelle or lesser known, more talented comedians are making jokes, it's a form of grieving. it's the way we take power away
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from our tragedyings. and to give you an example of this, it's impossible for anyone to fathom in culture, but the way this city rebounded post-9/11 is all the comedy clubs opened back up, and when i mean every one, i mean everyone was doing 9/11 jokes on stage. every comic you've heard of -- i'm not going to mention them -- but everyone. if you want to google a comic, it's how we took the power away from that tragedy. when you say to people who laugh that way you can't do this, well, they lose their outlet, but you still have yours. you have a right not to consume it, they don't have a right to get it if it's gone. guy: robbie, this is like two middle fingers from chapelle to many in the audience. is he big and popular enough where he's sort of exempt from cancellation? >> yeah, i don't think so. you know, he's been, you know, crazy mocking everyone for a long time, so i don't think he's going to get canceled. but it just goes to show know what you can't mock, right?
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what is the thing people can't make fun of, and that tells you a lot about the society we live in. guy: sacred cows. comedians have forever been sniffing out the sacred cow, and not so much anymore. people are walking on egg shells. >> if this is too offensive, allow me to recommend jimmy fela, streaming on amazon now. [laughter] unplugging my comedy -- guy bye and that's a real thing? >> yeah. guy: thank you, panel. we're all in trouble. [laughter] coming up, a new satellite series of images showing north korea might be building a submarine capable of launching nuclear missiles. should the u.s. be worried? i will ask an actual serious person, former trump deputy national security adviser k.t. mcfarlane, she is coming up. ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ guy: a new report claims that north korea might be closer than ever to being able to hit the u.s. with a nuclear missile. the center for strategic and international studies released satellite images which they claim show evidence of a new missile-capable if submarine being built by the hermit kingdom. the report says, quote: these images suggest north korea is making real progress in developing the second leg of the nuclear triad and lessening prospects for full denuclearization. north korea conducted its ninth short-range missell test since may just over the weekend. despite all the tensions though, defense secretary mark esper said today he still thinks we can smooth things over with kim. watch. >> obviously, we're concerned about their short-range ballistic missile tests. we want to understand what they're doing, why they're doing it, but on the other hand, we're not going to overreact. we'll get to an irreversible,
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verifiable complete denuclearization of the peninsula through a political agreement. guy: is there a way to get to that, or should we all just be diving under our desks and hiding? joining me tonight, former deputy national security adviser under president trump, k.t. mcfarlane, k.t., it really is great to see you. welcome back to the show. >> thank you so much. it's great to be with you, and on kennedy's show too. guy: let's start with north korea. how much leash should the president keep giving the north koreans? i understand that this is his diplomatic moon shot. he's really invested a lot in this, but at what point does it become detrimental? what goes too far? >> okay. so at the beginning of the trump administration, this was the first problem we looked at, how do you deal with north korea. because no president has ever been able to figure it out. it's a combination of carrots and sticks. and, you know, you can do more carrots, you can do more sticks, you can do them together, and
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that's what trump's done. little kim is just going down his checklist, you know, nuclear weapons, check. missiles, check. land-based missiles, check. now submarine-based missiles, check. where are we now? how do you ever stop him? i think trump, actually, on his own has come up with probably the best way of dealing with kim which is it's always going to be personal. kim doesn't care about his people. he'll let them starve, let dogs eat his senior advisers if he doesn't like them. so with kim it's all going to be personal. i think trump understands that kim likes sitting down at the big boy table. kim likes being in vietnam, in singapore, he likes being talked about as a world leader. trump has the ability to pull the rug right out from under kim, and then what does he have left? he goes back to the hermit kingdom. he doesn't want to just play we his pals, he likes being on the big boy stage. so i think trump has figured out a way to get new leverage on
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kim, he hasn't used it yet, but i think that's ooh part of why one week trump says he writes me love letters, and the next week he says, little kim, my rockets are better than yours. it's a psychological weapon against kim. guy: earlier in the show we were talking about some comments in the "wall street journal," an op-ed from jim mattis. and i want to read a quote from his piece today. he says what concerns me most as a military man is not our external adversary ises, it is our internal -- adversaries, it is our internal divisiveness. that is, i think, a very profound and worrying thing. you've worked for four presidents now. what's your reaction when you hear that from someone as respected as general mattis? >> well, jim mattis is an old friend of mine of decades-long standing, and i really admire him, and i think he's right. america solves any problems, we can deal with anything as long as we can get together and deal with it.
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but right now i think the environment in washington is just tribal toxicity on steroids. now, aye spent the -- i've spent the last year thinking about this stuff, and i've written a book which'll come out in the winter, but it's to talk about why have we gotten to this point. is there something different about america today? i don't think so. i think we go through these political revolutions every 40 years, and they're caustic, and we get at each other's throats. sometimes we even fight each other in the streets. but at the end of the day, somebody wins, somebody loses, and then we go on, and i think that's how we recreate ourselves. is so as miserable as this is, and jim mattis is right -- the biggest threat right now is what's happening inside of washington, d.c -- but at the end of the day, i think the people prevail. guy: well, i hope you're right. very excited to hear more about that book. thank you for joining us tonight. [laughter] >> thank you, guy. guy: the storm is coming, that's next. ♪ ♪ there's a company that's talked to even more real people
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♪ guy kentucky well, a new study claims that drinking red wine will actually shrink your stomach. who knows if that's true, too good to check. but let's salute the researchers for their work with assistance from the fine folks at the robert mondavi institute.
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this is the topical storm. tonight, school is back in session in many parts of the country, but with students in phoenix, arizona, aren't hitting the books because they're too busy hitting each other. this is not a braff slow show -- bravo show. we know this because it would is have a lot more bleeped-out words and would be, in fact, much less classy. this hullabaloo started when the girl you might see there in a phoenix suns t-shirt threw the first punch. for those of you who aren't nba fans, the suns finished 19-63 last year which means, i'm sure, the knicks will be hiring their general manager any moment now. three million people have watched the video of that back to school scrum, many commenters calling it a sad day for america. but if you google a sad day for america, almost every link brings you back to bill de blasio's campaign launch. he wouldn't fit through the
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white house front door. topic two, phoenix isn't the only place to watch the fur fly, down to tennessee where despite the strong economy, tourism has hit a bear market. these bears broke into a car and ate a case of combo ands a box of pop tarts. police shared the video as a reminder to never leave your marijuana in the woods. next thing you know, a bear has the munchies, a minivan has a broken window. animal control believes the brazen bears are still in the mediate area because they could not possibly have run very far. police are currently on the lookout for a bunch of bears wearing t-shirts in a lake. we're happy to report that no one was hurt in the snack attack. the family was completely unfazed by the shattered window. turns out when you purchase a minivan, you've already had your dreams shattered, so a window's nothing. topic three. the cobra adventure park in panama city, florida. it's a gorgeous place, but
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attendance has not taken off this summer, and this is why you never hire a ride operator who gets paid in white with claws. the cable was shot, and they wound up going nowhere. good news, they are both beto supporters, so they're used to that. and as disturbing as this looks, it's nothing compared to watching a guy cook a burger on an ending liberty muffin with broccoli. first, there was that salt bay guy, now there's salt beto. no one wants to eat at a restaurant when the customer's jumping up on the countertops and offering to play acoustic guitar. on second thought, beto should probably stick to pandering. win/win for him, actually. he, either way, gets to spend less time with his family. ouch. topic four.
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here's one for the foodies in the audience. dairy queen. just releasing a statement denying that there is human flesh inside their meat. that being said, if you're going to eat there, i'd still lay off the finger sandwiches. the fast food freakout started last week when federal agents raided a south carolina dairy queen over an illegal money transfer. a witness claimed on twitter -- that's reliable -- that dq was accused of serving human flesh which, of course, is a big no-no, because human flesh is not keto. or is it? anyway, the company posted a statement to assure the public their burgers are 100% real, but some people just can't agree if they should accept that explanation. it's dubious to some. [laughter] they are, big disagreement. i think we can all agree, however, that this year is way too violet, though it's nowhere near as violent as what might happen to your intestines after eating dairy queen meat. and finally, topic five.
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a florida man was arrested for attacking a michael jackson impersonator. witnesses say the impersonator told the man to beat it but, alas, he wound up getting struck by a smooth criminal anyway. buckle, folks. this one's going to be a real thriller for you. mostly because any other michael jackson joke could get us fired. i'd have to go back to hosting at a restaurant the, and jimmy would have to go back to wrestling alligators at a city wanna side show. tips are appreciated. 51-year-old todd mahon, there he is, very serious, he was hitting on a pyt outside a nightclub -- no judgments here, it's just human nature -- but mahon allegedly shipped out when he saw the king of pop and started throwing punches. granted, michael is a controversial figure, and it doesn't matter if you're black or white, that doesn't mean you want to be starting something. cops arrested him because hitting someone else is simply bad.
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mahon was released on a $100 bond, and he's now staring at the man in the mirror, asking him to change his ways, himself in this case. [laughter] all right. that concludes the fun. no more joke puns on lyrics or anything like that. stay tuned, because i want you back. ♪ ♪ but perhaps this year, a more exhilarating endeavor awaits. defy the laws of human nature,at the summer of audi sales event. get exceptional offers now. my car insurance to geico. this is how it made me feel. it was like that feeling when you pull your green sock out of the dryer and then the very next sock is the other green one. and then you pull out two blue ones.
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side effects include nausea, diarrhea, vomiting, belly pain and decreased appetite, which lead to dehydration and may worsen kidney problems. i have it within me to lower my a1c. ask your doctor about trulicity. is it to carry cargo or to carry on a legacy? its show of strength or its sign of intelligence? in crossing harsh terrain or breaking new ground? this is the time to get an exceptional offer on the mercedes of your midsummer dreams at the mercedes-benz summer event, going on now. lease the gla 250 suv for just $329 a month with credit toward your first month's payment at the mercedes-benz summer event. mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> guy: thanks for watching the show tonight. catch me on the radio, the guy benson show 3-6 ian weekdays, guy benson
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tomorrow, emily campagno, mike baker and more. for all of us here, i'm guy benson. good might from new york. ♪ ♪ lou dobbs next. lou: good evening, the hyperbolically anti-trump business press doing their worst trying to drum up fears of a recession, seemingly intent on driving the markets lower. they failed miserably in large measure because of president trump's strong credibility and rising popularity among investors. not even another yield curve inversion coul -- could dent


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