tv The Greg Gutfeld Show FOX News August 15, 2015 7:00pm-8:01pm PDT
>> it is 9:00 p.m. on the east coast and a moment of truth has arrived. >> okay guys it's a big night it's a big night for us. let's have a great show. here we go. >> thanks. live from quicken loans arena in cleveland, ohio. >> you're doing great. meagan i need you to make a sports reference. >> they are lined up like you might do at a sporting event. >> yes. jump in. say you're at the home of the cavaliers. the crowd will love that. >> we're in the arena that the cleveland cavaliers play in. >> we did our warm up. we were in the actual locker
room. >> make a joke about carly fiorina. >> she did not appear in the 9:00 p.m. hour because she unleashed a can. >> great. laugh. laugh now. well done. all right,sir. i'm getting hungry. chris, can you hit the buzzer for me? you want to go to commercial, i got a lot of snacks back here. nod your head if you're going to come back here for snacks. awesome. i got a cookie cake back here. just give me a science. how big a piece do you want? >> after a short time out. >> got it. see you guys soon. here is what's coming up.
one debate down, 73 to go. hillary proving she's a woman of the people as women leave her in droves. humans destroy hitchhiking robot. could this be the start of the human-robot war. i have noticed my rumba getting quite aggressive. thursday's debate was intense. the moderators were tougher than danny's face making common core questions seem like highlights. they focused on candidate vulnerability forcing them to move beyond their platitudes. >> knowing what we know now with faulty intelligence and not having security be the first priority when we invade it, it was a mistake. >> because somebody doesn't think the way i do doesn't mean i can't care about them or can't love them. >> i'm going to cry. the questions hit everyone where it hurt. a necessary role because later their opposition will do the same thing only worse. if candidate can't answer tough
questions how will he or she, i have to say that, stomach a debate with someone who really wants to hammer the stuffing out of you. >> i defunded planned parenthood more than four years ago, long before these videos came out. >> we feel like we're being taken advantage of. let me tell you who never gets talked about, the people who call my office who have been waiting for 15 years to come to the united states. they paid their fees and hired a lawyer, and they can't get in and wondering maybe they should come illegally. >> yeah. look, this type of preparation is nothing new. it's why rocky went to russia before the fight. you have to go to the toughest place imaginable before the fight if you have to beat a giant. if you went to the beach he would have lost. he went to siberia and he won. not only did we learn a lot
about each candidate, it turns out that a lot of people watched it with us. thursday's debate had more eyeballs than a fly convention. flies have lots of eyes. it was the most viewed cable news show ever. bigger than ronan farrow. many that never heard the disarming charm of ben carson did so that very night. for an anticipated debate that had more action than the last mad fax film. maybe the circus element i detest so much helped get the word out. >> that's a ridiculous answer. i want to collect more records from terrorists but less records from other people. how are you supposed to know? how are you supposed to know. >> use the fourth amendment. get warrant. >> americans learned the republicans have a deep bench by comparison and the democrats have a stool.
let's welcome some debaters. i'm going to go to you first because i like your tie. who do you think won the debate and why? >> well, i would say marco rubio won the debate. the reason for it is because he seemed so prepared and confident for what he's going to do as president and went into each issue with so much detail it shows he's really prepared and countered all the others by telling them no, this is how we need to do it. >> i see the successor to special report right there. who do you think lost? >> i definitely think that donald trump lost. in my own opinion donald trump has no idea what he's doing up there. >> who did you like? >> i liked marco rubio.
he knew what he was doing when he got on stage. he knew what he was going to say and he knew what would persuade the people to agree with him, take his side. he just knew what he was doing. i kind of -- i like that. i'm all about professionalism. that's what he had. most of the candidates didn't. >> very good. who did you like and who did you dislike? >> i liked john kasich. he brought out a really good point. i dislike rand paul. all of his points were not as strong as marco rubio's or john kasich. all of his points were not that great. >> yes. i agree with you, by the way. i don't think rand pauls were that great either. all right. who did you like? who did you want to hear more from? >> i like ben carson. he had an interesting twist because he works with brain he
thought we need more intelligence. he brought that to the table. he thought as a candidate he needs to bring intelligence and things of that nature to the table. >> that's good. before i move onto my other panel, do you ever try to debate your parents over stuff like if you want to stay out late or get money to go out? do you ever try any of your debate tricks on your parents? >> all the time. all the time. it's all about convincing them to do it. it's like a debate. you convince them to let you have a certain item or get you to go somewhere. it's all about convincing them. >> do you have any dirty debating tricks that you could give me? i'm terrible at debating. >> i would probably say there's always some type of video tape of your opponent debating. you have to take the weakness and use it against them. >> very good. do you ever get nervous and if
you do, how do you combat it? >> well, all the time because every time it's a big debate, i combat it by being myself and trying my best. >> that's good tip. how do you practice? how do you get better? >> i use pens and i put them towards my mouth to make sure i don't stutter as much and elaborate all my words. >> i do that too. i put my pen in my mouth so i'll shut up. i never know when i'll say something completely stupid. you did great. i don't think the people i have with me now will be able to surpass your expertise. joining me on the couch is the second hottest kennedy. internet action force editor in chief. that sounds like a comic book job. she's here because it keeps her off the street begging for beer money. he's so sharp you can't carry
him on plane. it's comedian david smith. a lot of people are saying it was too harsh. >> i think the trial by fire was wonderful especially for the first debate. it shows the moderators took this seriously, took the subject matter seriously. the candidates all have a lot to answer for whether or not they have a record. i appreciated that. i just hope that when the democrats are exposed to a more liberal forum that fox news counter part do the same thing and hold them to the same standards. it's really effective especially when you have a large part of the country decided independent. >> the moderators weren't as tough, that would be the story. oh, fox news went light on the candidates. >> i think you're absolutely right. >> thank you. moving on. no, go ahead.
>> i haven't had the opportunity to further my liberal agenda. they brought a serious game to what's been a really serious campaign so far. i thought it was great. as a liberal i support every single candidate up there especially chris christie. >> dave, we've never met before. i'm excited to see your opinion on this. who did you like and who d disappointmented you? >> i liked rand paul. full disclosure, i love an angry libertari libertarian. i might be the only person who thought he won the debate. imagine losing someone in 9/11 and having to suffer through a hug from chris christie. it's not fair. >> you're a terrible person. that's a lot -- that was a hug
debate. what were your thoughts? what was your thought? >> i do think the moderators asked some difficult questions. i think they were fair questions. truthfully, a lot of candidates up there didn't answer them. they did a lot of the pageant swerve. they go around the question to talk about what they really want to talk about. it wasn't much of a debate so much as saying whatever they wanted to say, which i think in first one it's kind of important. the american people see some of these candidates for the first time. >> everybody has been cruising on their own mythology of who they are. each question went and exposed that. >> it's really important thing. if debate serve one purpose it's so be able to defend yourself and your own record and make
case. you have to make the case and change people's minds. although ben carson is polling well, there's a lot of people watching that debate who are seeing him for the first time. >> whoever the nominee will get long speeches. they'll have a chance to say what they want to say. why shouldn't we see them grilled. >> exactly. >> the important function of debates now are to knock politicians off their scripts. these aren't really debates. no one is talking to each other. this is the only opportunity that you have to knock a politician off his or her talking point and get them to reveal something. >> we did have the split screen. i really appreciated that. i appreciate the way that debate wads organized. i know i work here but as an objectsive observers i appreciated when chris christie and rand paul went at it. that exposes a huge rift within the republican party. it was a very important exchange that will be continued. >> the most important exchange of the night, i believe, if i may say that? >> do tell.
>> i've got to go now. more on the candidates when we come back. on monday the republican presidential candidates were invited to take part in something called a voters first forum in place called new hampshire. not everyone did well. jeb bush seemed happy to be there but avoided an important question entirely. >> on legal immigration, does the illegal immigration problem cry issues affect the number of folk who is got in legally? and sleep deprived. bring us those who want to feel well rested. aleve pm. the only one to combine a safe sleep aid... plus the 12 hour pain relieving strength of aleve. be a morning person again with aleve pm.
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dresser in a wind storm. i thought she did great. am i impressed by her because of the competitors around her which were kind of lackluster. >> there was nobody there. lindsey graham looked like he was reciting a research paper from memory in the third grade. she came out and crushed it. she's classy. i like to see her on the bigger stage. being a star, she's star. >> okay. >> she has no political experience, i believe. does that matter? >> that wonderful. i owned a hp while she was at hewlett-packa
hewlett-packard. she's done more from me than any politician. >> i got hp in college. that was not a real joke. >> i am okay with it. so many of these people on the stage kept patting their own backs all night. i understand it's important for the american people to understand what you've done and what you'll do for the country in the future. she spent all of her time acknowledging the problems we have and what she'd do to fix them rather than saying what her political background is. >> that was like ben carson talking about he does surgery and nobody does brain surgery. >> use it to your advantage. >> yeah, thank you for interrupting me. >> yeah. >> as a liberal, i bet you can't wait to take her for being a woman. >> she makes me want to vote for hillary clinton twice. she had passion. i think that counts for a lot especially since so mr. of the candidates in both the b team and the prime time had the
passion of -- >> christ. >> they had a passion like that guy, the continental guy at your hotel. i think that's what you're responding to. >> i assumed she would stand out because she's been so much media jousting. she's been taking questions. she really schooled the candidates on that stage. i want to see her on the main stage again. who do they swap out to bring her in? >> i don't know. >> no was saying it would be an advantage for anyone to be in the small debate and she flipped that around.
>> i said it. as someone who has been at the kiddie table, you always get more food. they have the best food. they get the eat early. she was on chris matthews show. i don't know if anybody saw that. it was quite a confrontation. >> i was one of the nine people. >> it was about her comments calling hillary a liar. it's hard to get him to shut up. >> i didn't call her a liar. you made a generalized excellent about her, not me. excuse me. i will debate her. >> go through your list. >> benghazi, e-mails and server. i will debate her on the issues facing the nation. i will ask her, for example, how she can possibly continue to
defend planned parenthood. i'll ask her why she continues to say she's a champion of the middle class while every single proposal she's put forward makes crony capitalism worse and worse. >> at the end he's completely quiet. she made him into mincemeat. >> she did. she held her on on she has a substantive response for anything and she can make lists. >> let's skip john because we know he doesn't care. dave, good, bad, indifferent? >> amazing. i got a thrill going up my leg. liberals can't debate. they're great with two other liberals around a panel. >> shut up. >> see, look at you john, you're falli ining apart. >> look what she did to chris. he's a lion of the liberal
cause. >> i love it. she shut him down. >> notice how because she was a conservative woman there was no sexism controversy about that. she held her own because she's a conservative woman and we're strong. >> somebody's got to go to the gym. i can floss with those arms. >> i do sometimes. they watched the debate the same way i shower in my pajamas. first, more tape for monday's first forum in new hampshire. apparently lindsey graham is a world class magician. >> 30 seconds senator. thank you, senator.
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hillary clinton was sipping lemonade and laying out her southern accent. >> a little guy from arkansas. i said a lot. i said i'm not running for my husband's third time and i'm not running for barack obama's third time. i'm running for my first term. >> that was about as real as joe biden's hair. she might not even be a human being. >> i felt like i was watching an episode of dukes of hazzard. i'm sitting here rocking on my porch. >> could it be she has some kind of disorder like sybil. remember she has 13 personalities. could it be she's another southern person. >> i'm a little young so sybil is not something i've seen. i'm familiar with the culture
reference. she really creeps me out a lot. did you see her eyes? it didn't look very human to me to make her likable. you should be yourself not just try to be the other person. >> to be yourself you have do have a self. >> always don't always be yourself. nobody like anybody's real self. >> i'm never myself. i'm another guy that i murdered in '78. >> great job. >> dave, my theory is the more you know of her it's like one big know. it's like eating cotton candy, you eat a little bit, but if you eat more you throw up. >> that's good. you eat too many and you throw up. she was being one of herselves. she was being the southern one. she used to have a thick southern accent. remember she's laughing about getting the child rapist off.
remember she was laughing about it and there was no feminist outrage in the age of feminist outrage. >> that's a good point. we should bring that back up. >> would you like to see my hillary tattoo? >> you have a tattoo? >> across my chest. she's weak candidate. >> she will be up until she wins the presidency. fake over the top southern accents worked for george w. bush, so maybe it will work for her. >> you think he has a fake accent. >> he's a blue blood from new england. >> i think he was raised in texas. >> it's the product of the finest north eastern institutions. >> he's already blaming bush. >> she was consistent with that. say what you will about him and his policies but hillary clinton like fading in and out. we've seen this from joe biden. al gore was the worst. >> conservatives are deeply
romantic in some ways about what they want their politicians to be, but this is politics. >> this was inauthentic. from her e-mails we know she prefers ice tea and not lem lemonade. >> very good point. president obama dropped a bomb on republicans while defending his iran nuclear deal this week. >> it's most heart liners championing that to america who has been most opposed to the deals. they are making common cause with the republican caucus. >> well, does that make chuck one as well. he's one of president's biggest allies. even he can't get behind the deal. i guess he wants death to america too or at least death to smoochy, a really fun movie to rent if you have some time.
i have solutions to this. is that fair to compare republicans? >> i think all the kids are wondering what renting a movie is. >> that is very true. there's two beliefs here. obama can happily believe in one but dismiss the other. does that make sense. >> i don't think he's made a good case for detante. even john bolten questions whether or not that's a sound principle. i think it is. if you have them in the middle east with nuclear weapons it's not the worst thing in the world. i will say if you are so opposed to iranian hard liners then why on earth are you doing a deal like this with iran. it doesn't make any sense. >> i'm saying obama's big mistake is not cutting secret deals with iran.
>> i have a theory i want to throw out which you could ignore and answer any way. i think the solution is for america to build and give the bomb to iran because it's not going to be used. the bomb will not be used until they use it. they will never know if it works. >> the bomb will not be used until they use it. is he makes sense to anybody else right now? >> listen you -- >> go for it. >> woman. give them the bomb. they never know it's ineffective. it's filled with candy. they won't know until they use it on israel. they drop it. it's a giant pinata. >> then they will slowly be killed with artificial sugars. >> all right. still ahead, jon stewart is dead tired of doing his show. we'll discuss this. let's check in with our live studio audience. how many of you think my butt looked awesome in these jeans when i walk into the studio today? guess i'm keeping them around.
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>> it is a story mainstream media won't touch. why was a friendly bought left why was a friendly bot left to rot. he was murdered this week in philadelphia, the city of brotherly love. he was created as a social experiment by a group of canadian researchers after successfully hitchhiking across the netherlands, germany and canada last year. they gave it a shot of traveling across the u.s. the trip began in massachusetts bound for san francisco but only made it as far as philly before someone damaged the bot beyond repair. later in the op-ed they asked was the hitch bot killing a hate
crime. this is how it starts for what i like to call robocalypse. joe, hate crime. >> robot crime is to complicated. this robot had big dreams. it was going to vegas. it was going to yellow stone. it has big plans for it even though it couldn't think for itself. as a small bucketed body, it doesn't deserve this. >> he wanted to play the slots which is like having sex for a robot. >> oh. >> i know that people think i'm crazy when i talk about robot rights. my theory is time is infinite. time goes on and on and on. it's only a matter of time before we create robots that
indistinguishable from humanity. when it happens we'll need rights to protect these beings because they will have feelings. robots have to have feelings. if they don't then they're cold psychopat psychopaths. does that make sense to you? >> totally not. of course it does. you're not completely off the mark. i don't know why you're concerned. >> the only handicap that a robot has now is a plug. we can unplug them or let them drain. what's going to happen is robots can solve that by creating a
battalion meaning they have will robots behind them to charge them. >> this is called artificial intelligence. what thoughts. >> they never want you to stop talking about this. what is consciousness? >> that's what i'm saying. >> yeah. let's get high. >> i don't know. we're going to cover this on the news because it's a sensational story about people killing a robot. if you look at the data, robot on robot crime is -- >> robot on human crime is
pretty huge. >> huge? >> like millions. i don't have the stats in front of me. >> how do we know it wasn't assisted suicide? how do we know he didn't want his life to end and some wonderful human came to help him. >> that's a horrible thought that you would take away the potential for this beast. >> i saw that robot earlier that day. he was very happy. >> what are your thoughts on this? i think this is a serious issue. it may not happen in our lifetime but maybe in your lifetime. >> it's going to happen. it's definitely going to happen. yesterday i said thank you when an elevator door opened. i felt really stupid at the time but i'm not going to feel so stupid when the machines take over and make me their queen. >> human beings have to really consider making nice with robots so they remember us. >> i want to let you know i've never heard you mention robots without mentioning robot sex. taking it a little far.
i speak for america when i say come on. >> i don't call them robots anymore. they're just robotics. >> so they're just your friends. >> okay. before we go to break a helpful video for people of all ages. man buns. you've seen them everywhere on celebrities that don't bathe. it's when a guy with long hair bundles it up on top of his head. not like a ponytail. what is up with this thing? we have uncovered video that argue man buns is something else entirely. behold our first installment of where it comes from. >> they've been around for centuries and most people think they are just extra hair on the heads of guys. did you know that man buns are not from this planet.
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normally regardless of how much time employees take off. the children will be auctioned off to middle earth cannibals. not to be out done microsoft which makes miniature tissues is offering 12 months parental leaves. they have given to birth mothers that's a total of 2,000 weeks. i don't even know what this means kennedy. you have kids. >> i do. >> you are the only person here that has kids. >> they will back fire. the argument is americans don't take enough time off. netflix has a liberal lead policy for vacation and sick days. they eventually breed laziness. they get jobs and work really hard and they are burned out. i am going to adopt a child hire a nanny with my full-time salary and sit around and watch
netflix. >> i would join kind of foster child and turn them in when i get board. >> they can turn you down because you are a foster child you can sue them. >> you don't plan them ever i have been told. will this do more tharm than good? >> you can't just not go to work. you can't. people say absence makes the heart grow fonder but at work everybody starts to talk about you and hate you. >> that is true. >> if you do this you are the only one your kid is going to like you. abc sense makes the heart grow fonder. >> i should be a mom. >> you would be a great mom. >> i would be a great mom. >> no you wouldn't. is this bigoted against the childless? >> maybe a little bit. if there is a big call for this, it ends up costing the companies
then no other companies are going to try doing this again. this is where the free market is such an amazing thing. the problem is the government writes a law they cost all of us a lot and they blame it on them. >> that's like the guy who has minimum wage of 70,000 a year and watched his whole company implode. >> i think nexus is doing this because people won't take advantage of it. they don't take their vacation days because they value career and moving along and advancing ourselves over family. while they are offering this it makes them look good and they won't lose any money on it because they don't take advantage of it. >> you seem like the guy who would take paternity leaf after making a puppy. >> i have to make a baby. i have to make one soon. >> this is great because we are all pro family. >> we are. we are very pro family. >> this is a way of netflix getting you to repopulate. maybe that's their grand rapids
scheme. ra oo net flex is the worst way. you benning watch and don't have sex. >> if you binge watch lexington field. >> that is one of the characters of dynasty. >> last word to you john. i think this is a strategy on netflix to have people time off what do they do? they watch netflix. >> right, because netflix hires all of its viewers. >> yes. >> they do. i just want to work less. >> everyone is working less, fewer hours. thought i would buzz that up. anyway time to take a break. something something john stewart. something something farewell. first a word from our sponsor. >> tired of not being able to keep your beverage fold cold. get a boob kooz zee today.
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about a vaccine that can help prevent shingles. >> finally a question that has been bugging me all week. of course jon stewart did not die. don't start tweeting that. the way the news covered it, you would think he left this earth. >> jon stewart won't be around to comment on the republican debate. >> what am i a clown? huh? is that what you say? >> the ir replaceable john stewart. >> stewart said he is just a comedian trackicracking jokes b legacy goes beyond the jokes. underneath the facade was a civics teacher at heart. harry smith, nbc news new york. >> i really did think he died.
he's fievenlt he's alive. jolene kent katherine joe ann and the student who did an awesome job at the urban debate league. i am greg gutfeld. i love you america. >> so exciting. >> selfie. selfie. yea. debates. >> bret baier. >> bret baier. so good tonight. he is bringing his a game. >> he did that thing. he was the governor. >> nobody is crying. it is like they don't even care. >> really bad. really, really bad. seems like everybody is pro america. >> yeah. >> they all say they are for
america. >> peach snaps is the worst idea. >> what is schnaps. >> i bet you ben carson drinks red wine because it's good for your heart. he's a doctor. >> how long is this thing? >> i don't know. too long. it is longer than receptions. >> nobody likes receptions. everybody pretends to like inception. >> titanic, that film i could get on board. not literally on board because it sank. >> how about instead of the debate it is like this except it is law and order svu. >> every time they run out of time it would be -- >> law and order svu for president. >> who would be president? >> chris maloney. >> yes. >> stabler, stabler.
stabler. >> i don't want to watch any more. tonight on "red eye," hillary clinton wants you to respond using only emojis. i guess she likes her reviews done by highlight magazine. and "sesame street" is moving to hbo. will this lead to more puppet nudity? first, a news break. live from america's news head quarters, i'm patricia stark. another survivor pulled from the wreckage in northeast china, following this week's