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tv   The Greg Gutfeld Show  FOX News  November 22, 2015 10:00pm-11:01pm PST

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belgian police lock, up 16 people following hours of anti-terror raids. military vehicles and soldiers patrolling the streets of brussels. the terror threat in the city remains at its highest level. salah abdeslam who is suspected of carrying out the terrorist attacks in paris was not arrest. hazmat suits worn to protect from deadly viruses are missing from a room.
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health officials complained this last thursday, the same day france's prime minister warned of of a possible chemical weapons attack. the city has been on guard since 130 people were killed by terrorists this last friday. here's what's coming up. the question i refuse to answer until i get my chocolate milk. my interview with the very next president. how should we respond to isis? if he doesn't, i'll take his whine away. my book tour, the sexest people in the country. let's get started, america. i'm playing racquetball later with my good friend clive owen. i did think this was seergs
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and do meaning and not serious. >> it's a little filthy, a little raunchy. >> now autos embarrassed again. every indication is dry is possibly a sociopath. ♪ somehow the terror debate has now morphed into a refugee do bait as one side delights in calling you names if you don't willingly embrace everyone. if you're the least bit afraid of getting killed by a terrorist, you're at least a bigot or frady-cat. >> they're afraid of widows and orphans coming into america. first they were worried about the press being too tough on them during debates. now they're worried about
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3-year-old orphans. that doesn't sound very tough to me. >> screw this petulence prince. his belief that a strong reaction meedz for more error, that bizarre. buying locks will avoid more home invasions makings no sense to me. america accepting refugees, it's like a relationship moving too fast. syria is the complicated love interest who wants a commitment. we as a country, we're a mess. we're just not ready for a serious commitment. it's not you, refugees, it's us. we want to slow this down and get to know you better. in the meantime we're happy to help you find a place to crash, but not my place. it's a mess.
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as a nation i need to focus on me, instead of you. i hope we can still be good friends yes, you can coop my sweatshirt. let's welcome tonight's gist. they list him as a job refshs, josh bolton. and she's so smart, the s.a.t.s take tests about her, gabriels, the author. and he's more shocking than shag carpet. and her first words were, make that a double, joanna. i want to go to you, ambassador. if i have? i wordz about refugees, does
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that mean i hate orphans? >> no, the president and much of the discussion is this is not our first refugee crisis. we've faced this issue many times before. for the president who prides himself on international law. he avoids the treaty we entered view 65 years ago. most of the people don't qualify as refugees. the qualifications is you have to show a well-founded fear of persecution based on your religious beliefs, race, ethnici ethnicity, something like that. most of those coming out of syria don't qualify. they have been in a horrible war. something that make them qualify as refugees?
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no. if president wants 100,000 syrians in the country, let him say it. >> there's something going on in brussels. we're pretaping this. do you expect something happening in brussels? >> it's been remarkably specific about the nature of the threat. it's hard to say at this point, but i wouldn't put past isis they would try a series of attacks. maybe this this misdirection. maybe they want to she they can intimidate the capital of the european union but i would take the threat seriously. >> i've raved about your book. the thesis of your book is we have to look for these nonstate actors. you don't need a huge nation to destroy you. it could be one guy, a drone and anthrax. doesn't that lend itself to a
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bigger refugee problem? >> no. i disagree with the ambassador. 10,000 people become an easy target for politics of fear. we admit 50,000 people into this country, they don't need a visa to come in. >> 15 or 50? >> 50. 20 million uses the visa problem. it's under the current law, it's not a good reason not to admit them. >> you scared me even more. >> i'm sorry. >> every time i talk to you or read something by you, i'm ter fried. >> you should stop inviting me. there's no indication any refugee has committed a attack of terror. they say the fight vens isis is a joint fight.
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we have a common enemy. tweer good at bombing but not good at helping you guys. >> there's evidence of a buy logical attack being planned. the risk has changed. >> chemical or buy logical, yes. >> this is the way to obtain glory, be more heinous and destructive than the next attack, yes still, it doesn't answer the question, why would you deny 10,000 refugee brut admit 50 million others. if you want to deny everyone, say that out loud. >> do you blame snowden? >> i think snowden caused damage in the sense of the whole disclosing capabilities that i think was a very harmful thing.
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we see it in the debate about encryption. there are no request there has been serious costs. >> gavin, you got up, flew to paris the day after the stack. >> i did, indeed. >> i saw you interview a number of people. >> i argued. i was hoarse. >> the muslims say it was jew. i was to too chicken. they said, this is you, i hated america. and they had just eaten american because there is a burger joint on ever corner. no one considered the possibility they had guns because that whole concept has been scrubbed from the french brain. no one thought this could be foreseen.
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it was seen as a train crash. >> or as bad weather. >> a fru freaks that are kraz. they're not muslim. one guy said they're not even human. let's give up. >> these attacks have something in common, white male privilege. i'm going to put that out there. they're reacting against white male privilege. isn't there a happy medium where we're happy to have you here, but not right now? >> from what i've heard the vetting process would still take a while, somewhat up to a year to clear everybody. i'm not sure you how you do that if they don't have the paperwork. they're refugees. they're fleeing. it's easy to claim #refuge claim #refugeeswelcome.
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it's he's is -- easier to say that than refugees are fearful. to have concern is not to be bigot bigoted. >> i believe that it should be -- if you're traveling, you know how you get your vakfy nations, you should get a pocket koran and memorize three things just in case. >> there was an attack people got out -- they were released as hostages for being able to recite verses. >> they want. >> you said we need them for economy. why do we need people on welfare for the economy? >> the vast majority have been muslims that don't buy into the
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caliphate tradition. when we pit it as a war of civilization, we play into those hands. >> last word to you, ambassador. what about saudi arabia? that's all i'm going to ask you. what about saudi arabia? >> of course they don't want to take niece people because they think many are terrorists. i remember during the vietnamese boat people, we proceed japan take a lot and japan said, we don't think the vietnamese would be culturally comfortable. >> before we go to break, it's time to look at the tougher questions on the 2016 campaign trail. coming up this week on the
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campaign trail 2016. marco rubio meets with voters in new hampshire but has he ever seen a ufo in person? >> yeah, when i was like 4 years old. >> plus, hillary clinton heads too denver. what does she really think about the westminster dog show? >> it's a national disgrace. and finally, donald trump tries to maintain his lead in the polls but does he think it's impossible for magic mike 3 to maintain hugh jackman, brad pitt, bradley cooper, the hemdz worth brothers and ryan gosling? >> you can't do it. you can't do it. too many things involved. >> till next when on the campaign trail 2016. >> you're wrong.
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it can be done and it would be awesome miami interview with lindsey graham. i'll show him a great new fondue recipe. stick around. i have great credit. how do you know? duh. try credit karma. it's free and you can see what your score is right now . i just got my free credit score! credit karma. really free.
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the group referred to as the
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contained j.v. team bys certain along. why does the president keep telling the country the isis situation is under control, when clearly their threat is higher than ever. i asked senator lindsey graham earlier about the growing threat of isis and whether it's coming to america. he answered. that's how it works in an interview. senator graham, thank you for joining me today. i've got to say, you were probably the most goutspoken candidate when it came to isis and also predicting what might happen in the future. does it bother you that you are right? >> yes. i wish i were wrong. it bothers me that our president has is so overwhelmed by his job. in the last week, we learned his strategy is not working. he doesn't realize the immediate threat to our homeland. he's acting as if isil is
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contained when they're not. and we've learned that some people are saying boots on the ground because they have to now. i've been saying boots on the ground for two years because we need to. and iraq and afghanistan, i've been there 35 times in the last decade. the reason i have been so worried about isil is i know they intend to come here and i have the experience to win a war we can't afford to lose. that's why i'm running for president. >> do you think we're here because we're in this bad place, because we spent the last couple of years demonizing certain programs. we portrayed them as infringing on our rights. so now we have republican candidates distinguishing between religions with the refugees. respect they connected in some way? >> number one, we're here because president obama did not follow sound military advice by leaving a residual force of 10,000 in iraq. in 2010, al qaeda in iraq were
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on their knees, the surge did work. and he withdrew all of our forces. became isil. three years ago, assad was on the ropes, the free syrian army was in tact. he went against all of his advisers, so i blame obama for the rise of isil, not anyone else. but on our side of the aisle, we have people acting like we're fighting a crime, not a war, that want to take our intelligence community and make it dark. not realizing the only way to defend america is pick up the attack before it happens. so we go from one extreme to the other. >> it seems to me the only way we get intel now is after the crime. we were able >> yeah, that's right. >> the paris raid occurred because of the paris attack. >> yeah. it's not a crime. i've been a military lawyer for 33 years. we're in a state of war with isil and other groups.
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i've got an authorization to use military introduce the week after thanksgiving that says we can go any place on the planet, no limits on time, geography or means to destroy isil. they represent the same threat to our homeland that al qaeda did after 9/11. so i want to be at war with them. they're at war with us. i want to monitor in a constitutionally sound way activities that would be picked up to prevent the next attack. i'm not trying to listen in on phone calls, i'm trying to gather intelligence to prevent an attack on our nation, and we have a constitutional process to do that. but i'm fighting a war and many people on our side are fighting a crime. there's a big difference. >> responding with rage rather than facing the islam phobia,
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how do you answer that? >> that's ridiculous. number one, i'm pretty hard ass on the war on terror. but i'm not going to follow somebody because of their religion. i'm the president of the united states is what i'm running for. we'll follow people based on their behavior. if there's a reasonable suspicion that you're doing manage that threatens our security, we will monitor what happens to protect the nation. but no, we're not going to follow people because of their faith. follow activity that could lead to an attack on our homeland and realize that we're at war. so i'm right where i need to be. i'm fighting a war within the constitutional process that we set up a long time ago. >> what is your refugee crisis? essentially, the media is asking hypothetical questions to the candidates who answer then find themselves in trouble. >> i don't have any trouble saying the following. suspend the flow of refugees
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until we get a vetting system we can better trust. paris hass" taught us a couple things. number one, they can infiltrate the refugee process. but there's 20 other ways to get into america. what i want to do is stop the reason to leave syria. i want to get on the ground with about 10,000 americans and 80,000, 90,000 arabs and destroy the caliphate and i would like to send people back to syria, stop this war before lebanon and jordan become a victim of it and we get attacked here at home. there is no substitute for destroying the caliphate in iraq and syria. i have the experience to win this war. no one else seems to understand we're at war and how to win it. i do. >> thank you, senator. i don't see anything bigoted about being concerned about safety. thank you for joining us.
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coming up, campus cry babies behind the scenes on my book tour. constipated? trust number one doctor recommended dulcolax use dulcolax tablets for gentle overnight relief suppositories for relief in minutes and stool softeners for comfortable relief of hard stools. dulcolax, designed for dependable relief remember when christmas was magical?
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16 people were detained. no explosives or firearms have been found. the city remains at a level 4 alert as it enters a new week. a fugitive from the terrorist attacks, salah abdeslam still not found. meanwhile, jeh johnson is reiterating there is no credible threat against new york city. still, nypd is preparing for the worst case scenario after a threat by isis last week, holding a drill sunday in a city subway station, just days before the macy's thanksgiving parade. now, back to the greg gutfeld show. quick impression time. who are these cats imitating?
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[ laughter ] obviously, they're imitating the many university presidents in provos, who are scared to death of punks who claim their schools aren't safe places. last month at dartmouth, protesters interrupted students trying to study. >> black lives matter! >> there are reports that the protesters shouted obscenities at studying, things like, f you, you filthy white -- so when student affairs got wind, she told the protesters a thing or two. things like, i'm sorry, and you're right. and they're wrong.
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>> so that caused a fuss, and she apologized then to conservatives. but look, lady, don't apologize to me. stand up for the kids who will probably fail their exams because they couldn't study or remind the safe spacers that the library is also a quiet place. no, it's much easier to give in. you're as predictable as a cat with a toaster. >> we need to ban those toasters. we're back with our guests and
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we added two. she's brainier than a bag of brains. our op-ed catherine from national review. cat, i'm going to go to you first. pretty brave administer there, huh? coming out and just going right out there and not bowing. >> it's disgusting what she's doing. basically what's right and wrong doesn't matter. as soon as someone said you hurb my feelings, automatically the person whose feelings got hurt is right. you can't do that in a library. you can't run around screaming in a library. that's not safe. what are the safe spaces? the mizzou saying no media safe space and expect that to work? that would be like if i go into a restaurant and said, i understand that you're saying these tables are full, but this restaurant is my safe space. everyone has to leave. >> i'm going to try that. if anybody who lives in new york knows what a library is for,
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it's for transients masturbating. not for shouting or even reading for that matter. they have to do it quietly, and not in my safe space. all right, john, i want you to defend these students in a kind of failed left wing way that you might. >> as a liberal intellectual greg, i'm going to do my best to dumb this down for you. i support these kids. this is what you o6 in college, challenge the status quo and protest and express yourself. that's -- >> but they're expressing against expression, john. >> that's fine. >> you're saying they don't want what just said. >> if you're lucky they'll keep it up and disappear up their own [ bleep ]. it is what college is supposed to be. one day they can grow up to be like this. >> are you single? >> it's complicated. >> i'm wonder if you're saying this to score with college kids.
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you look like a liberal professor who says these things hoping -- >> i look like someone that wants to help the hot youth? >> exactly. the hot, troubled growth. gavin, is it too late to fix this? >> yes! burn them to the ground. rush limbaugh was right, they eastern done. the free market is going through a state of flux that's broke. they got so many customers by diluting the quality, now it's 60-k in debt to get stupider than before you went in. are we going to make it better again? >> i say give in, joanne. >> what would that entail? >> that means no security, no regimented structure. let the lunatics run the asylum. >> that's happened. >> but the students are paying all that money to attend these institutions saying i want my
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education and this is just screwing everything up. and i deserve >> that's when the parents realize they can't pay for this [ bleep ]. once the parents say what am i doing andmkgátk look for real colleges. i think it's going to get worse before better. i like saying that. that's why i wish i was a doctor. this is a small scale version of what's playing globally. you have the intolerant demands of a faction versus the liberal crumbling traditions. doesn't that sound familiar? doesn't it sound familiar, an intolerant faction demanding and watching the liberal traditions that have been successful.
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>> maybe this isca a metaphor f our times, which is nothing but bubbles, telling themselves what they want to hear. and that's not a liberal problem. that is all media and everybody. >> she said in her speech, a lot of conservatives are not nice. what's the matter with not being nice? it's like mean people suck is a political doctrine. >> i think that always so nice is what you say about something or someone that doesn't have anything else to offer. oh, he's nice. oh, boy. >> i'm a nice person. >> and you're an idiot. >> at least i get laid. >> wow! you don't hear that on "meet the press." you don't. i watch "meet the press." sometimes shirtless. >> wow. >> time to take a break. up next, i'll show you what happened on my book tour. if you leave now, you'll never
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get a new cell phone? definitely. well that's credit. credit karma. yeah. first step, credit karma. >> >> earlier this month, i had the privilege of meeting thousands of fans while on tour for my new book, "how to be right." it's still on sale. needless to say, it was a blast and i can't thank everyone enough for coming out. you're the reason i get to do this stuff for a living. wow. any way, on our way through kentucky and indiana, i invited a camera crew and one of our producers, tom o'connor, to tag along. >> thanks, greg. we're excited that you invited us to join you on the tour. frankly, everyone back at the office didn't think it was real. apparently it is, but did you really need all that? >> we're just minutes away from another signing.
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a lot of people ask me do i have any rituals before i do a signing? i sign with my right hand. what about this hand? this hand is getting stronger, so what do you do this hand? before each signing, i do left hand pushups, just to get it in shape. ♪ signing books, signing books, going to sign some books ♪ where am i? got my bananas. what are you doing here? anybody special? >> oh, i'm sorry. >> there's some dude with a bus out there. he's parked in the fire this is terrible. would you like a banana? >> thank you. >> this is a special banana. you'll get it signed. >> greg! >> good to see you again.
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it's been so long. it really has. how are you doing? >> okay. >> you're not allowed to look at me while i'm signing. i get very self-conscious. >> so you just met greg. everything you hoped for or not so much? >> we wanted to be home in time for "the five." >> anything that surprised you? >> he's a lot more handsome in person than on tv. just don't tell my husband. >> how was it? >> it was wonderful. he gave me a banana and he signed it! is that not awesome? >> when you got up this morning, you had no idea he would give you a signed >> i'm the luckiest woman in the world. >> has anyone ever given you a signed piece of fruit? >> no. >> first time for anything. anything that surprises you when you meet the fans? >> i'm surprised that they think i'm good. >> i love you.
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>> i love:v you, too. i love you more than you know. >> i watch you every day at 5:00. they announce your name, i scream "i love you, greg." my husband thinks i'm crazy. >> the people are very sweet and keep bringing me gifts. >> you'll never guess what it is. >> i hope it's expensive red wine. >> she gave me bourbon balls, which i thought was a medical condition for a long time. >> i had that in '88. >> doctor, i have bourbon balls. >> who has a better job at fox? i can think of one person. there's only one person. >> yeah. phil keating has a great job. >> you have the second best job at fox. >> i get to sit next to dana across from kimberly guilfoyle. i am archie. i have betty and veronica.
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>> where's kimberly if >> only men ask that question. >> do you ever wish you wrote the book at 25 instead of 50 so you could have had that type ofc tour? >> no. whatever book i wrote at 25 would be terrible. and also, if i wrote a book that was successful at 25, i would be the world's biggest [ bleep ] now. >> has there ever been any whackos? >> there have been whackos before. it's always the last stop and some guy shows up, dressed as a clown, and he's holding up six pounds of raw meat and saying -- >> sorry about that, by the way. >> that's how we met. >> ah, memories. by the way, save that banana, ma'am. it will be worth something in a few years. up next, joanne has some up next, joanne has some important black friday
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it's just five short days away and i can't wait. i'm finally having a third arm attached. should make folding laundryél a
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breeze. here with tips to survive black friday is joanne nosuchinsky. >> while many say thanksgiving is their favorite holiday, real patriots say black friday. now, i understand not every shopper can be as seasoned as myself, so i put together a set of rules that will help even thz most novice shopper make out like a pro. let's begin. one, honor the day. black friday shopping is to be done on friday, not thursday. not monday. but friday. and no online purchases. they're not only lazy, but undermine the importance of hardworking retail employees. two, wake up early. getting up before the sun guaranties you'll score door buster deals.
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three, do your research. map out your mall. take stock of which stores you want to hit first but their sale times. also, avoid santa's village if you ever want to have children one day. four, shop selfishly. while stores are decorated for the holidays, black friday is not for purchasing christmas gifts. that's what christmas eve is for. your moneymu town spent on you alone, because it's very important to treat yourself. five, big purchases first. you're going to want to drop some of those purchases off before lunch, so get the stuff out of the way. besides, there's nothing like the joy of waving off a parking lot shark who thinks you're heading home. as if. six, lunch before noon with cocktails. you've been at it for hours, so you need sustenance to keep shopping and liquid courage to keep spending. and if a mom looks at you with
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judgy eyes for drinking before noon, she's just jealous. so drink another for her. seven, impulse purchase. do you need it? no. but you buy at least one item your normally frugal mind would talk you out of out. and eight, add up how much you spend and saved. saved should be the larger should be justifying the whole ordeal. following these rules, you can become a great shopper and great american. back to you, greg. >> the first three letters. >> i don't spell. that's what% spell-check is for. but fun isn't -- functional things aren't fun. >> i just wanted to point that out. >> will you be shopping, greg this >> i find this to be a prehistoric ritual.
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>> i hate shopping. i hate shopping. i buy everything on the internet. >> shopping hates you back. >> that's great. because it's the worst. that's people everywhere, and this is going shopping on a day when you know there's going to be the most people there. i like about four or five. >> that's good. that's all you need. >> do you even shop, gavin? [ coughing ] >> i shop for cigarettes. that's about it. >> what's wrong with you? that's amazing. >> you can also catch a cold from all the diseased shoppers. >> john? >> i love to shop because i'm a good american. but we're moving to a christmas based economy, so every day is going to be black friday. that's the only way we can keep going. >> black friday matters. joanne, i feel likeck i learnedo much and yet nothing at all. so thank you, i guess.
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we're going to take a break. greg's mail up next.
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yes, we are twins. when i went on to ancestry, i just put in the name of my parents and my grandparents. i was getting all these leaves and i was going back generation after generation. you start to see documents and you see signatures of people that you've never met. i mean, you don't know these people, but you feel like you do. you get connected to them. i wish that i could get into a time machine and go back 100 years, 200 years and just meet these people. being on ancestry just made me feel like i belonged somewhere. discover your story. start searching for free now at whether your car is a new car an old car a big car a small car a car that looks kind of plain a car that looks kind of like a plane a red car a white car a blue car a red white and blue car a green car a city car a country car this car, seriously this car
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♪ it's time for gregmail. i read, he answers. so we all dance in an awkward circle. here we go. walter leads things off, which republican candidate do you think is the most persuasively correct? >> mmm, obviously referring to my book, how done right or persuasive with greg. q thinking, i would say chris christie and marco rubio and it would be like if they ran together, they would be like the number ten. because you have marco rubio who is skinny. they both complement each other, very, very articulate.
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>> what about ted cruz? >> naming the five problems with the debate in perfect consecutive order. >> there's something opportunistic about him. i have to move on. >> this is from paul. i don't watch your show because of your dazzling political insights. frankly i find that boring. i tune in because i'm smitten with cat. been out of the dating scene for years, so do you have any suggestions that would culminate in an opportunity for me to get my mittens on this kitten? >> we know that cat put that letter in there for a reason. and number two, anybody that writes in to ask for dates probably hasn't bathed in a while. so i'm going to send you, paul, her direct phone number and her home address. >> i don't want his mittens on my kitten. >> i think that's poetry.
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>> sexually harassed poetry. >> that's it for the show. thank you, gavin. gabriel bloom, ambassador john bolton, senator lingggggggggggg puppy. >> doesn't get better for that. "fox news sunday" is next. i'm chris wallace. terror attacks around the world renew post 9/11 fears about whether it could happen here. >> our highest priority is and will remain the security of our homeland and the safety of all americans. >> we will not be intimidated and we will not live in fear. >> plus the intense debate in washington over accepting syrian refugees. >> apparently they're scared of widows and orphans. >> if you just get one of them or two of them or three of them wrong, you've got a big problem. >> we'll talk with republican


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