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tv   The Greg Gutfeld Show  FOX News  February 25, 2017 7:00pm-8:01pm PST

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thanks for so much for watching. greg is next. goodbye from the capital he really is the original gangster. [applause]
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friday, donald trump returned to cpac like a conquering night hungry. they better have soup. i wonder, does he like campbell's. >> i like campbell soup. [laughter] who doesn't? except for cream of celery. i wouldn't feed that to a hobo. he hit on his enemies including cnn, i wonder if he has any nicknames for them. >> look, the clinton news network. [laughter] >> i'm glad he said clinton. imagine the other options that begin with the letter c. trump manages to have his cake and eat it too. he can roast the media while still getting all the media. how does cnn handle it? >> the speech i thought was overly long, it was boring in places and flat. he looked tired. >> i wonder if trump has a message for them.
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>> they lost the election, it's like how many elections do we have to have. they lost the election. now trump did limit his wrath to the media. he also hit his predecessors. if only our leaders had gone to the beach. if our presidents would have gone to the beach for 15 years, we would be in much better shape than we are right now. that i can tell you. >> that i can tell you. he also reminded us he will fulfill every promise and talked about what will happen next. is the country going to get bigger. >> it is going to be bigger. >> wait, slow down. i want to make sure you get all of this. go ahead. >> it's going to be bigger and better and stronger than ever before and he rained appreciation down upon his supporters. in case you forgot, what did did hillary call them. >> hillary called them deplorable. they're not deplorable. >> it's true. it's amazing how much hillary mattered in this election.
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one word, deplorable's framed a movement, galvanize the opposition. deplorable's was her beetlejuice. she said it, then it appeared and destroyed her. as this was going on, hillary tweeted this message. >> let resistance plus persistence equal progress for our party and our country. >> seriously hillary, it's time to halt, as they set the bar after last call, you call, you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here. so, with cpac we are seeing a first. a a conservative gathering that isn't a miserable replica. to his credit, trump brought fun to this world boiling down substance into entertaining nuggets. trump gives us memorable burns. >> dependence didn't think we would win. the consultants that suck up all
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that money oh, they suck it up there so good. >> times have changed in deed. last year to trump didn't even go to cpac. now he owned it. talk about unite and conquer. he might've been the first choice, but he was the last man standing. [applause] let's welcome tonight's guest. she is sharp and bright like a knight made of firefighters. jillian turner. he gargles with full clorox and flosses with barbed wire. he's a former navy seal who happened to track down and kill someone named osama bin laden. who knew that bin laden was killed by a metrosexual.
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if the world were her oyster, she would develop a shellfish allergy. and finally, the moon is his beach ball, wrestler tyrus. [applause] a right. i'm in a go to you ross so you don't kill me. what did you make of his speech overall, any thoughts, perceptions, themes question? >> it's an interesting speech. he likes the media, he's told the media dislikes them and now he's at the point where if he doesn't like them he locks them out which i'm not sure about but whatever, he's running the show. he just came out, obviously the the cpac is based anything anti-media they're going to love him. he came back. he was like the guy voted least popular in high school who comes back and buys the high school
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and then he torches it with everyone in it. i just wonder, where was he all the other years like you mentioned in the opener that he wasn't there last year. >> well because, he knew it was problematic. >> was just so interesting to see he is now, as the pres., really welcomed really welcomed and embraced by the conservative party. >> winning heals all wounds. that's the point. there is a lot of stuff he said that is in conservative, like the trade stuff, i don't buy but i buy back as i like his stance on national security. there's kind of a grab bag but there's no liberal libertarianism in there. he's shifted cpac toward the nationals group. i could've done without less references to bernie and hillary all the time.
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that's a little bit of being a sore loser. >> he is a sore winner. i have to say i am a sore winner. i'd like to rub people's faces in it if i went. i have a theory that he is for the right what obama was for the left. he provides kind of an energy to the group that didn't exist before. >> i would except that theory. i also think some people it's party before belief system. they were pretty anti- trump. oh he one, i love that kyle my gosh. come date my daughter well, maybe not. okay, i'm i'm one of those people. everybody, there's a little little show i do call the five, but every day i was hypercritical of trump because i wanted him to be a better candidate and then when he want them gone okay want them to be a better party so i have suspended why haven't suspended my criticism but i've given him a honeymoon. so far, most of it, most of his
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policies aren't outlandish, it's just the way he delivers them. >> is more in-your-face. i just like that he said you can come, but were gonna walk out and now they're opening up their house to him and letting them raise their children on his moral system. we have a libertarian right here and she's gotta be squirming a little bit because they pretty much forgot. >> it's irritating that the country is going to waste more money in the middle east even when trump himself complained about all the money we wasted in the middle east but nobody seems to's realize it doesn't make any se all. no one is consistent anymore. >> i am. i'm holding it together. no you're not. by the way, could you imagine. i've worked with you for your half. you're not work holding anything
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together. >> not emotionally, but my political views i do. >> your hanging by a thread and imagine the spirit imagine see packet trump had lost. it would've been a mass killing khakis. it would've been cannibalism. it would be like the end of the "game of thrones", remember the red wedding, but no, didn't happen so it's good. >> to me, his greatest, his greatest attribute is his ideological inconsistencies. i love that. i think we need more of that in the political system. >> i like the fact, i don't like litmus test. also, i have to say, they are having fun while, that's that's all that matters, if the president is having fun i've been to cpac, i've done speeches
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, i have the speeches were everyone is stone faced in the material i'm giving is great, by the way they're just looking at me. it's nice to see people having some fun. you have to throw a few down. look at the other side of it. let's say trump didn't win, you would've had three hours of cruise saying i told you. it would've been mass suicides everywhere. that's what i'm saying. it will be khakis, if you could imagine also ted cruz would be condescending for a change. i was at cpac. there were a lot of khakis. you went there and we actually have a package. you want to throw to it. take a look at my package. they say cpac is a conservative clinical action conference but we all know what it really is. it's the prom and the prom party all rolled into one. you didn't need a day, you're in in the, doesn't steal everybody's lady. is that the plan.
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you seem very excited about the pack. it's like heaven. when i die, this is where i want want to go. i love cpac so much. what are your goals for the night party wise? nice quiet dinner that's what i would sell my parents. what is your strategy for picking up women? i already wore my best suit today so we'll see if i get any luck with that. when you have to return that suit to men's warehouse. >> actually, i had bought this. i heard ben carson's throwing the after party. are you gonna go. >> hopefully it's not too late because he probably goes to sleep pretty early do you feel like you're at the prom all over again. >> actually not, my prom prom was much better. i came in a limousine. >> i remember mine but only because i cried.
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>> all through the prom or just for a moment in the prom. >> just for a moment. i was wearing light up flip-flops and somebody told me they didn't like me. they liked me but they didn't like me, like me so are you like a couple or you're just going to's friend. >> this is my father okay, alright so you're taking your dad. >> good judgment. >> so what's more fun, spring break or cpac. >> cpac, of course you get ted cruz and you get the party. >> when i think fun, i immediately think ted cruz. i got a feeling there was no legalize drugs and my prom. my profession fights me every day because of the money. they don't like me because they think prohibition is a good idea. >> you're throwing the after party. if i had a pick a guy to do it would be this guy. what is your goal for the night, party wise well, let's just say i don't plan on sleeping much
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who would you have the prom king and queen of cpac. >> kellyanne conway. king and queen. >> yes. >> she can do it all. >> you heard it here first folks, breaking news that was some great work. >> that must feel good. >> feels very good. i was wondering when ben carson throws the party on the invite, doesn't write come join us. >> get it, because the twins thank you for that. >> up next, a monologue so powerful but first president
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president trump trying to keep the nation safe and it's scaring the hell out of the left. rex tillerson and john kelly went to mexico this week to address border security. after eight weeks of hearing president obama explaining why gitmo must close they say it must stay open because we get intel from there. that makes sense, that's the point, the national security policies are pretty normal, but they are explained in a way that we are just not used too. >> all his son for the first time were getting gang members out and drug lords out, we are getting really bad dudes out of this country. these are bad dudes they don't wear uniforms. they are sneaky, dirty rats. >> all right.
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we been so coddled by safe language that we think his words somehow make his policies worse. the last guy would penned himself into a pretzel before he would call an act of terror and active tear. radical islam wasn't even in his dictionary, which leads me to sweden. >> you look at what's happening in germany, you look at what's happening last night in sweden, sweden. who would believe this. sweden. they took in large numbers, they're having are having problems like they never thought possible. >> yet. last week that set the world hair on fire when trump suggested he endured a spike in crime. tonight i hear it's a show. of course, everyone said trump was full of it, except for for the swedes. to leading swedish democrats echoed trumps claims in the wall
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street journal writing he did not exaggerate the current problems. if anything he understated them. the media had mocked him until riots had ensued. so when trump said something, he's wrong because he says it bluntly until you realize later that he might be right and then you move on quietly. doesn't matter how he said it, liberals are going to hate orders and extreme betting anyway because national security is so mean. borders, that's discrimination. how dare dare you keep everyone out. so yeah, gitmo, borders, there
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also mean, but why shouldn't they be. trump's words are rough but times are tough. are his initiatives that out of bounds? i find them reasonable. he is straight out of brooklyn. >> what i was going to say is it's not that he's talking to tough and too bad, it's that he sounds like. >> is so unclear to me what i am allowed and not allowed to say on television .
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he doesn't sound like he so tough to me. he sounds like my uncle at thanksgiving. when he talks about national, he says these guys are terrible, we've got to get rid of them. they're bad, they're bad dudes. do you remember when the obama era spokesperson, i think he was on special report, it was one of this networks program. he said the word dude and everybody freaked out. now the president is saying dude in a national address, but he's saying bad dudes when tommy said he was saying like what's up dude. it was insulting. due by my theory, he's fairly traditional but he's speaking our language but he's going to do something really weird in washington and say what he thanks. he's trying to speak the truth as bestie can, but the problem is if you speak the truth you're going to get labeled.
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they're going to to call you an islamic slope or misogynist. i don't know what that means but when i hear people screaming at that is that what it is that's what they do. a lot of these people, they will bet the hell are you when you're trying to get a gun as a citizen but if you want to come in for free, come on in. i have to say, i think you. [inaudible] all right, my theory is the infiltration through migration has changed the world. we have to look at things differently and sometimes we have to use blunt language. sometimes you have to tell these
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[bleep] what time it is. i don't care how you say it, just mean what you say. i'm pretty sure that was not right. the sweeting thing greg, the bloodline blunt language is one thing. first of all, they stole stole that word. when i was in college. now you know. okay, you too, i have to have to separate you with more than two people. all right, you are trying to say something. now we will give you a chance to speak. okay, that's it. [laughter] i'm joking.
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>> that's a fake unicorn so as i was trying to say, i agree with you a little bit, for example on immigration. he talked like he was a nice guy, but if attack about sweden, he said something happen last night that didn't happen. he was referring to tucker carlson's show okay, but that's not in sweden also, you can lie with statistics. for example people running around saying sweden is the raise capital of the world because there's a high number of offenses, but they are more encouraged to report the events and is more things that count as rate. saudi arabia not encouraged to report them therefore saudi arabia appears like a feminist
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paradise but i don't agree. >> good point. the pentagon announced they are calling the islamic state isis not isil. this is a big deal to me because it's like clarity matters. for so long was sean combs, was the puff daddy or pdd. and it's like it drives you nuts. it just drives you nuts. finally i'm going isis or isil. now i know. i thought that was interesting. maybe not. coming up. a story so hot to burn the roof of my mouth but first wire town said no way to cops giving kids high-five.
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♪ ♪ it's like having the power of a trading floor, wherever you are. it's your trade. ♪ ♪ e*trade. ♪ ♪ start trading today at live from headquarters, i'm robert gray. right now up to 28 people are in critical conditions in new orleans. city police say a car iran into a crowd of people at a mardi gras parade. the driver has been taken into custody. police believe that driver was drunk at the time. compresses the new chair of the democratic national committee. he used to serve as a labor a labor secretary under president obama. he became the first latino head
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of the dnc. president trump campaign promise promise to build a border wall with mexico is moving forward. they announced they will open bids from construction companies in mid-march. the contracts may be awarded as early as mid- april. i'm robert gray. they banned the hand. in massachusetts the police department started a program or officers go to elementary schools to high-five students. what's wrong with that u.s.? i have idea. i answer, but about a dozen parents expressed concerns about the program. the northampton police describe the complaints writing people were concerned of kids of color, undocumented children are any children who may have had negative experiences with the
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police. apparently, a lot of five-year-olds have -year-olds have had run-ins with the law. the police chief says high-five friday started as a way to foster better relationships between police and children. they have since canceled the program and are hoping to find a new way to reach out to the school. i believe we have tape of a new initiative you can't beat a high-five. shouldn't liberals be celebrating this kind of thing. it's funny, i thought about the first time with the undocumented parents, if they if they've hate high-five friday, if tire is
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coming that to get to know the cops. we had an officer would come in with the talking parent and read to kids. >> i was only in your in your school. >> noah's initiative, it was everywhere. no, this would cap would come in once a month and they would see the parrot and they view the please as people too. it teaches the kids to talk like a. did you squawk? no, the bird did cool tricks and he rode a bike and stuff. i don't believe it. i believe it when i see it. i've never seen a bird ride a bike. >> the point is, he built a bridge. if kids are afraid of cops, what
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better way for them to meet cops and learn they don't need to be afraid of them it was great. i learned how to talk to police and officer bird helped me. i'm pretty sure he has been in jail at least once. >> no i haven't i talked myself out of it every time. this is how you got donald trump. you created an atmosphere of anti-law enforcement. your people painting law-enforcement as bad. you've got a candidate that says i like cops. if someone tries to murder me, they know they will get in trouble for doing that. that's pretty nice, if they
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catch me. >> finally, i'm not sure i'm for the high-five as a subliminal endorsement of narcotics, you know high, and it replaced, i'm old enough to remember give me five which when you went like this and you went like that wasn't that ten. >> yeah, give me ten. >> no one says give me ten, but that got replaced with high-five in 1977, dusty baker, they introduced it in the dodgers, both in the late 70s, 77, 77, 78. >> you are the only one on the show that was born before 1977. none. none of us understand about that thank you very much.
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has announced this week they discovered seven new earth earth size planets orbiting a star. honestly, it feels like this is the right time for an alternative universe to be discovered. what do we know about these planets? three of these planets are located in a habitable zone meaning the most likely to have liquid water and potentially have life and even frozen yogurt. [laughter]
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luckily here we here have a far more expansive research team in nasa and we found a few more details. for example one of the planets is called ab topia. its core is nothing but rock hard. and we an entire planet made of gold and silver. the good news is it's also reverse mortgage and catheters grow on trees. it is orbited by six outer rings consisted of my pillows, and the last livable planet is filled with nothing but billions and billions. [inaudible] i'm moving there next week, by the way. after a quick getaway to ab
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topia. all right. jillian, is this discovery good or bad. i feel like it's kind of a misogynistic question. can we nominate people to send their? >> yes, we can you can't send a planet to a planet are you excited over this? >> am concerned as i wonder what they do with the guinness book of world records. we'll have to change that all up. if someone eats how many on this new planet. >> it's interesting. >> no one would eat cheeseburgers on planet ab, hello it's interesting to think, they're seeing these planets so far away and it brings you back to everyone killing you over
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man-made beliefs. maybe we can get with the times and not murder everybody and try to understand everyone. my theory i think we need a vacation planet like the equivalent of a cabin upstate and when stuff gets really bad we all had to cabin planet. i just want to find a planet to train on for months. >> i don't believe any new planet. >> remembered jupiter was a planet and now it's not a planet. guess what, i've seen none of these planets. i've been to none of these planets, let alone know if there's water on these planets. also there is water on my apartment. i don't listen to new planet news whatsoever and there is no
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sign of life in your apartment. [laughter] i want to say i have a cat but i feel like that's not bragging. >> you are correct. >> this is an interesting theory. it's not my own. even if there are signs of life, why is there a lack of contact. the theory is because the living creatures in our universe before us invented the technologies that we are on the verge of now. they discovered computers and artificial intelligence way before we did, and what happened is artificial intelligence eliminated all of the meaty aliens and now it's just the quiet hum of machinery. that's why we don't have any signs of life because they're about 1 million years ahead of us and they're all dead or, they dropped us off with some tools
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and their betting to see how long it takes us. that is good or maybe they just had an ozone wall that they made the next kids pay for. it's always back to that wall. coming up, this is so delicious you just might dive into the tv to eat it, but don't. we discussed the oscars. not really, we just bash them.
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now some very sad news, the oscars are sunday night, it's true and the hollywood reporter finds that six out of ten americans can't name a single best picture nominee but seven out of ten said they will watch the oscars anyway. this got me thinking, and then i stopped and i wondered why'd we watch the show we don't even care about the movies. does anyone know how this annual crab fest actually got started. we delved deeper into our latest installment of where does it
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come from. backing cavemen times a bunch of hollywood notice something was missing. despite having the best trainers, drugs, rhinoplasty's, cars and other they realized something was missing. so they decided let's give these gold dudes away on national tv for insecure adults driven by attention, the oscars are a therapeutic exercise in adulation because how can you enjoy your life if others don't know you're enjoying it. according to science, it's been known to reduce actors weeping in their car by 50%. this has been where did we come from. [applause] like john goodman's shadow, that
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covered a lot of ground. tyrus, i could've could've said you but then you would beat me up. i don't know why were talking about this but i saw some of the oscars, thoughts? >> i don't really care. i'm not up for one so i don't care. i will tell you one thing, i'm still little mad about the out of africa color purple thing i thought halle berry should've got it twice for the same movie. you've mentioned happy gilmore being snubbed. that still bothers you. >> it still bothers me. >> that's a good point. most people watch that and they loved it but. >> the english patient won that year. how often do you quote lines from that, anybody, never. >> i don't know what it is in
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1999, when shakespeare in love be saving private ryan. >> that's so true. i'll tell you i do like the actors in the art because themselves up for one and he reminds me of a myself. saving private ryan, if i'm not mistaken. [inaudible] jillian, i don't like political speeches but i crave them on the oscars because it's hilarious and it's fun to make fun of them. i like the political stuff. in my room weird? yes, but not because of that. >> oh thank you. what ends up happening is they get up there, tell me if i'm wrong. i don't think i'm wrong. all they talk about is how they
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had such a great time making the movies. oh my goodness, but it's true. they get up there and they get this award and they think million people and then all they ever say is i had such a blast making this movie. i'd love it if they said mean things in those speeches, you know who almost made me not make this movie was this person. i am so glad so-and-so got lyme disease and i got to step in and take over paying on it few movie sets, that's really how it is. they literally stab their back and then they go on a little rant, but it's really cutthroat. >> you think of 20 people, who likes 20 people. that's true. i don't even know 20 people. >> tyrus was in a movie. >> he's been in a few films.
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>> what movie were you in final thoughts on deck. if you leave now you can forget about brunch tomorrow
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>> we are running out of time. what you wanted to say all show but haven't had a chance to say so here's your chance to say it right now. jillian. >> i don't have any books coming out. i'm not giving any speeches, i'm not done any shows, but my album is dropping next week. you should check it out. >> what's it called. >> i forgot. out be more prepared next time. >> it's all right, you're okay okay on a serious note when it think steve for inviting me to give a speech. i was gonna give one this week
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in my senior advisor wrote me a speech i couldn't deliver and i just want to say thank you i wish i could've. apparently i missed out. caitlyn jenner is a disaster. what happened? what did i miss? being the queen king of disasters herself, she shouldn't be talking about anybody. >> all right, there you go. kat, last word. >> have a book coming out. >> what's it called. >> i have have to write it and then it's going to come out. >> any idea what it's about? >> it's going to dwarf. [inaudible] all right, thanks to jillian, rob o'neil, the studio audience,
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i love you america. [applause] that's fox reports. i'm julie banderas, thanks for watching. "watters world" starts now. jesse: "watters world" is on. tonight, some of the biggest names in washington here. plus i hit the streets in search of illegal immigrants. >> illegal. jesse: was it difficult to cross the border? >> no. jesse: one college honoring


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