tv Through the Decades CBS January 28, 2016 11:00pm-12:00am MST
(cheers and applause). >> stephen: good luck explaining that. to your fiance. >> to my fiance. >> stephen: exactly. >> my fiance is loving it. that's true love. >> stephen: i like your description of true love succumb here, there are markers on your body and she asks, no questions. >> no questions. >> stephen: whatever makes you happy, josh brolin. >> she looks at me and she goes colbert? and i say yes. and she goes it's okay then. >> stephen: all right. anyway, tough guy, that movie. >> yes. >> stephen: that movie. >> yes. >> stephen: it's go about the golden age of hollywood. >> uh-huh. >> stephen: and you play something called a fixer. >> a fixer. >> stephen: what does he do? what is a fixer. >> okay. so the thing with actors, whatever, even now, when you think of them you think of kind of debawcherrous acts, right. >> stephen: yeah, yeah. >> so a fixer is a guy who makes sure and kind of whatever maf yoso way he k men with chest hair, which i play in this movie. >> stephen: was it all just
like that? (laughter) >> apparently. well, you just figured it out, didn't you. but is a guy who makes sure that all his debau cherous spoiled children are kept in check. >> stephen: he leave-- leans on the press. and says let me fix you. >> no, i put it out there. i pretty much-- . >> stephen: if you don't put it out there, nobody will put it in there. >> okay. >> stephen: an old joke, an old joke. >> it's true. >> stephen: you should carve that on a headstone. but were you-- when you were younger you were a very rowdy guy. >> no, that's what you think by looking at me because i'm twice your size. >> stephen: no, i look at that, i look at that, okay. >> oh, wow. >> stephen: there you are, tough guy. >> you were angrily put it out. >> stephen: no, because are you asking. >> you want to arm wrestle or something, you want to prove this. >> let's do it.
>> all right. (cheers and applause) >> i can't do that. >> stephen: you can't do that. okay, i will keep mine on, i don't want an unfair advantage on you. >> watch my sleeve [bleep], [bleep] (laughter) >> there are very few parts of okay. but they've got hair on them. >> i'm not going to touch you. i'm not going to touch you. >> stephen: okay, let's do it. >> okay. ready? >> stephen: all right, y'all call, ready, one, two-- [bleep] what are you doing--.
(cheers and applause) . >> stephen: that was like arm wrestling a back hoe. >> are we done? we have one minute left. >> what should we do. >> stephen: do you want to talk any more? we don't have to talk any more if you don't want. >> hail caeser is amazing. just tell people to see it. that's why we are here. >> stephen: you saw it last night. >> i did. i thought it was very good. >> stephen: i know what i want to ask you about. talk b you know, fixing things. >> instagram. you have to mention instagram because i love instagram. this came from instagram, and i am ale curious because i love intra gam, it's my new thing, i like intra gram-- instagram. no, no, we have 30 secondsk my daughter is going to be in a lifetime movie on february 6th called the lost giferls. i got it all in-- lost girls. >> stephen: i do have a question for you. >> yes.
you for some reason you have read every one of donald trump's books three times. >> not three times but i read a lot of his books. i was a big fan. >> stephen: why? why did you read them are you buddies with him. >> i was. but i-- . >> stephen: you had a fallk out, what happened? >> no, no, i appreciated his-- he single handedly turned around the economy of manhattan. i found that very fascinating. i think he's-- . >> stephen: does he say that in the book because you're the first person, even he hasn't said that yet. >> he will. >> stephen: he will now. >> he will now. >> stephen: he will quote. no less of an expert than josh brolin said. >> josh brolin said. even one of my republican friends where i grew up, its very republican area of california thought his daughter watched a show that i was on. and these are high-end, i guess, i don't really know, but they
had red soles, he thought that i wore them as a republican symbol, that i was-- seriously. he thought that-- like it would be blue. >> stephen: i can understand that. i'm wearing these in support of black lives matter. (cheers and applause) "hail caeser" comes out february 5th. josh brolin, everybody. josh brolin. we'll be right back.
when you have a lot of followers, you should take them somewhere. they want to see the world through your eyes or your stomach. so show them the waterfalls, the duck boats, pthe sheep and sweaters made from sheep all i need is one card and a witty instagram caption. pfor rewards...for the services and protections of membership... for the journey...
welcome john dickerson. (applause) nice to see you again. >> nice to be here. >> stephen: the first thing i want to say before we get into like the heat of the meat with this race, is that one of the nicest things about you hosting "face the nation" is that you have family history there. i'm a big fan of your mom. and she was-- among many other things, your mom was an associate producer on "face the nation" for the first broadcast in 195. >> 7-- no, 54. >> stephen: 1954, the now you're the host. and she was the first female right. >> first for cbs. >> stephen: for cbs (cheers and applause). >> stephen: that's her. and i got to say, kind of a dish.
>> how do i respond to that? >> stephen: how does it feel to be hosting the show that your mom was working on in 1954. >> it feels enormous. it's big muf after taking over after bob schieffer. >> stephen: of course, everybody loves bob sheefer, yeah, so withness so that is big enough. but then, you know, you've got kind of her looking down on you. and it's amazing can i even get >> stephen: just very quickly, do you think trump hurt himself or helped himself by saying i'm not showing up at your debate. >> we'll know when they start voaght. he is running his on strength. this is about him showing strength and dom nation. it's right in line with what he has been running on. >> stephen: so good, bad? you know, i have called you publicly the most elvish correspondent i've ever seen
it said ask not advice of the elves for they shall say both yes and no. and with longer hair, you could do-- easily. >> that is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. >> stephen: let's go get to iowa. this is the fifth presidential campaign that i have done jokes about, but this is the first year i get to be honest about not knowing what any of this means. what is a caucus? cuz it's been explained to me four times before. what is a caucus? i mean why not just vote. >> it is an algonquin word that means the meeting of chieftains. >> stephen: seriously. >> yes. >> stephen: cuz you could just make it up and i wouldn't know. >> people are listening though. >> stephen: exactly. >> so that is what a caucus is. but the two parties do it differently. >> stephen: okay. >> let's start with the complicated one, the democrats. there are about 1700-- . >> stephen: this will happen on monday.
places. you get into a room. groups. if one group doesn't represent viable. they go. and they go-- they are up for grabs. >> stephen: so this is not rooms. >> in rooms. >> stephen: they play red rover red rover, hand your delegates on over? how does it work? >> actually, that's true. if you don't make viability, okay, so your candidate x and your people don't-- you're not viable. they are now up for grabs. and the other candidates try and grab them. because if they can grab them it means they get more delegates. >> stephen: were caucuses invented before there were pieces of paper and boxes to put them in. >> it is this way because it is supposed to convey-- the democrats don't want to pick a winner. they are winnowing, they are like a sales clerk at a store. they go in, they are taking the thousands of ties and saying here are three we would like you to choose from. it is not a winner. they want to have a conversation and they want to be engaged in
not just a thumbs up or thumbs down. that is the complicated dem kraltic prosessments the republicans, they just put a name on a paper and vote. >> stephen: that makes a lot of sense to me. okay, so is it more important for one party than the other to win this? >> is it more predictive, how about that? >> well, no. i mean you have somebody like mcgovern who et goes the nomination without winning iowa or new hampshire. so. >> stephen: why do you care about these first two so much. >> it's a first inkling of where the party. is whether the candidates have out-- what is great they are having conversations one-on-one with this. if i can't convince you one-on-one, then i just lack the political skill that will be necessary. >> stephen: but trump's not doing one-on-one. he's doing one on 20,000. >> well, he's the exception-- exdrk dsh exception as he has been in this race. everybody hell's had to do coffee clachs, build support by the dozens, by the ones and twos. trumps has shown up at big stadiums.
the iowa state fair. thand is a great test. ted cruz is the old-fashioned way with technical expertise, specificity, scientific analysis of who the voters are and trump is just going to swamp it with his enthusiasm. that is one of the things we'll learn on monday night. >> stephen: has there ever been anybody like donald trump, somebody in the past. because are you a fan of the history of running for president. anybody out there like him? >> no, you would have to build a-- you would have to take pieces of-- i don't mean-- perhaps. >> stephen: perhaps frankenstein? (applause) i'm afraid we're out of time. i got an answer out of you, donald trump is frankenstein. the host of "face the nation," every sunday morning. go ahead. >> tell me about a ben ef lent thing that was built in pieces and i will use that analogy next time. >> stephen: the united states of america. (cheers and applause)
all the hard work... time in the service... community college... it matters. it's why we, at university of phoenix, count your relevant work and college experience as credits toward your degree. learn more at phoenix.edu. this is shaving. a blade. many blades. sharp blades. blades here, blades there. some more over there... whoa! that's not another blade. this is shielding. with lubrication here and here. the new gillette with proshield lubrication before and after the blades shields from irritation for a close, comfortable shave. the new proshield from gillette. the best a man can get.
us about the water crisis in flint michigan. please welcome erin brockovich. (applause) so everyone knows you as an environmental activist who became famous for your work in hinckley, california. i admire you, you are a real life superhero. are you like water batman. is there-- (applause). >> stephen: how do you, how are you getting involved in the crisis in flint, michigan. how did you first find out about it? >> from the community. about a year ago they contacted me. and people were concerned about the changes of the color of the water, they were concerned about the smell of the water. they became concerned about their families. so oftentimes when we get calls we'll send investigators out, which we did.
for the city on how to treat the situation. >> stephen: and when was that. >> this time last year. >> stephen: a year ago. >> yes. >> stephen: okay, so let's give people an idea of what is going on. now this is water coming out of a hydrant. >> hire hydrant. >> stephen: we may expect this not to be necessarily the cleanest water in the city but it's supposed to be potable water. >> it is. and it's definitely concerning to see that color. >> stephen: this is coming out of a sink right there. and it is at a hospital. this is the water coming out of the glass today. and this is just somebody at a water. how did this happen? >> this happened, the city was having some obvious financial issues. and they hired an emergency city manager. and they made a decision to switch the water systems. and everybody's water quality is different. so you can't just willy-nilly start changing river systems. so they switched from the detroit water which is from huron, to using the flint river water which is very cor rosive.
hit the system, it caused all the lead, the iron, the an copper to leech out from the led pipes and all that lead was delivered to the residents and their taps. >> stephen: people need water every day. what are people going to do? >> well, everybody has been graciously delivering bottled water. one thing that they need to do right away is find the right ion exchange resin filtration so everybody can have a water filter at their tap and on their shower head to provide some measure of safety until this problem is ultimately corbected. >> stephen: is there a way to filter out lead? >> there is. you have to have the type that-- the exact type of ion exchange resin swi sold which they can find. but the state should be providing that for every single household, every single family member, period. (applause). >> stephen: i have been reading lately that there are
water not only in many cities in michigan, but in many cities in the united states, especially east of the mississippi river. is this just the tip of the leadberg out there for what we are drinking? am i drinking lead? is there lead in that water we have provided for you tonight? if this came out of a tap in new york city? >> well, well, i couldn't tell you the answer to that for certain. right now about this water. i can tell you that flint, iceberg. i can tell you for certain that this is a national crisis. that we're not getting ready to here. even since flint has hit the national stage, we've now found out that seabring, ohio, has the same problem and they realize customers lead. the same thing has just now been happening down in louisiana. and we're hearing rumors, i haven't verified it before i came out, that they're having
so the answer is yes. we've been treating water differently with something called chloramines which is very acidic. our infrastructure is very old. and it's causing all the iron and lead and copper and everything in these pipes to leech out. because if it is a cheaper way than doing what they should be doing. and it's affect many municipalities across the united states. >> stephen: if there are people out there who want to help, what can they do. >> one thing you can still do is the american red cross. >> stephen: are they providing water. >> they are providing assistance and water to the community. and i think that one thing that's really important that everyone can do, there is a local hero out there. her name is dr. mondaya. she has done an incredible job with these children. and so many thousands of children are going to be poisoned by this lead, that's going to impact them for the rest of their lives. we'll probably never be able to permanently remove the lead. you could be looking at neurological conditions, learning disabilities. and she is setting up a
on how we can help those children and their medical care going forward and for the rest of their life. her name is dr. mondaya. she's going to start a foundation. so look for that, please. >> stephen: erin, thank you so much for being here. >> thank you very much. >> stephen: erin brockovich, everybody. we'll roob be right back. (cheers and applause) here we go. ah man, who invited these guys? hey clay, it's cool if we order some delivery? it' s time for you guys to make the right call. we're having digiorno pizza, tfresh-baked in
we brought you here today to get your honest opinion about this new car. to keep things unbiased, we removed all the logos. feels like a bmw. reminds me a little bit of like an audi. so, this car supports apple carplay. siri, open maps. she gets me. wow. it also has teen driver technology. it even mutes the radio until the seat belts are buckled. i'm very curious what it is. this is the 2016 chevy malibu. and it sells for? it starts at twenty-two five. what? oh wow. i mean with all this technology.
video streaming burns tons of data. and those other guys love over charging you for it. not t-mobile! now you can binge watch without watching your data. it's binge on - only from t-mobile. get unlimited streaming on netflix, sling tv, hulu, and more. plus get four lines with up to six gigs each for just thirty-five bucks a line. that's right. six gigs each plus all the video streaming you want with binge on. just thirty-five bucks per line. and it's only at t-mobile. crawfish shorts i like your style hooked it just a little bit (window breaks, car alarm sounds) don't open that cellar door
lucky shot. mmm mmm mmm mm mmm mm mmmmm switch to centurylink prism tv, and get the same great channels cable gives you, without having to deal with cable. yes and? and...there's whole home dvr. plus tons of on demand options so you can watch whatever, whenever. yes and? why do you guys keep saying that? it's the first rule of improv. by saying "yes and," we accept the reality created by our comedy partners, paul. yes, right, i know. do you? feel like a hollywood insider
green light, go i can't hit the gas can't turn the wheel can't go back and make a deal sun ain't up moon's gone away sure gets dark before the light of day it's a long way there and it's a long way home and there ain't no map for the road i'm on wind won't blow stars won't shine been that way for the longest time looking for something to show me the way
,, ,, . >> stephen: that's it for the late show. don't forget to watch "face the nation" this sunday morning. john dickerson has mr. trump, mr. rubio and his!round table. now stick around for my friend james corden. good night, everybody. >> james: tonight, one of us is getting a real tattoo, right here. i pray it's not me. this is "the late late show." >> reggie: are you ready
and feel the love tonight it's "the late late show" ladies and gentlemen, all the way from -- give it up for your host, the one, the only james corden! ( applause ) captioning sponsored by cbs >> james: good evening. welcome to "the late late show." thank you for staying up for us. thanks for being here, guys. as many of you know we have joked a lot on this show about presidential candidates like ben carson and donald trump, but in terms of real comedy, there's one presidential candidate who
and that is mr. ted cruz. no, it is. if you are a true comedy connoisseur, this guy brings the laugh every time. we already know he does killer "simpsons" impressions. >> but dad, i'm a vegetarian. >> but lisa, animals are so delicious. >> excellent. >> james: sorry, did we just watch an episode of "the simpsons?" is that the wrong clip? oh. oh, that was actually ted cruz!? wow, he's good, isn't he? cruz is on fire! now, you know that guy at your office whose whole sense of humor is just endlessly quoting movies and tv shows that he's seen, verbatim? you know, the guy that walks up to you and says, ( borat voice ) "my wiiife!" or you're in the kitchen and he's like, ( austin powers voice ) "do i make you horny baby?" for like the 5000th time. you know that guy, right? now imagine that guy is president of the united states. (
but here is the routine that won me over. re-enacting a scene from "the princess bride." >> for example, one of my favorite scenes was when westley, the dread pirate roberts, was brought in to billy crystal. he said, "true love? there is nothing better than true love." billy crystal goes, "you're right, there is nothing better, tomato salad, when the mutton is so lean..." >> james: i mean, you almost wish he would do it a second time. oh, that's right, he did. >> there is nothing more normal than true love. and miracle max goes, "you're right. you're right. there is nothing better than true love, except a nice mutton, lettuce and tomato salad, where the mutton is so lean..." >> james: i mean, he is so good, isn't he? can you imagine what billy crystal thinks when he sees that? applause )
what? i don't understand! what? i mean, what are the chances? >> well, i tell you, i was just walking down the street... ( laughs ) >> james: i can't believe this is-- it is almost like we planned the monologue around your very presence being here. >> almost. almost. >> james: almost. so, what do you think of ted cruz's impression? >> the first time i thought it, i thought it was pretty funny. the next time, shouldn't he be doing on something else? like voting in the senate? and then the third time i went, "oh, just stop!" i think it is very endearing. i'm glad he likes the movie. so at least he has good taste on that front. >> james: well, sure, but it is terrible. >> yes. >> james: i mean, it really is. is there anything...? >> it is a little creepy. it is a little creepy. >> james: because you go, "aw," and i look at it and go, "yeah, no, shut the ( beep ) up!" now, billy, like, is there anything that you would want to say to ted cruz? >> have fun storming the white house! ( laughter
( cheers and applause ) >> james: do you-- i mean, genuinely, genuinely, because, he's not funny like you, do you think he can win the presidency? >> it would take a miracle. >> james: ladies and gentlemen, mr. billy crystal! >> reggie: it's "the late late show" it's "the late late show" whoo! it's "the late late show" it's "the late late show" it's "the late late show" ( applause ) do you believe that, reg? billy crystal. >> reggie: amazing. >> james: incredible, right? we have other guests booked on the show but i think we should cancel them. you don't need anyone else. we should cancel the other guests, right?
really? all right, you win. shall we see who our other guests are on the show tonight? in the red room, they've sold more than 65 million records, had 137 #1's worldwide and have performed to more than 10 million fans around the world. a little group you might have heard of. harry, liam, louis, and niall-- applause ) >> james: how are you, guys? >> good. how are you? thanks for coming down to see us again. i really appreciate it. i should tell you that i actually -- i got stuck in a bit of traffic this morning. when i do that, i have to go in the carpool lane to work and i very kindly got some work from one direction. ( applause )
another day. thank you for being here. we can't wait to see you out here. they are also performing later in the show. one direction, everybody! ( applause ) it is a fun show. a lot of fun stuff. now as you all know, tony romo is one of the great quarterbacks in the nfl, and we were all so sad that he is out for the rest of the season, but i know he's going to bounce back. he is a great guy. a few weeks ago, tony and i hung out, and now we're besties. take a look. i don't know many people in los angeles, so in order to try and make friends in america, i've gone back to doing it the way i did it when i was in school. having sleepovers round at people's houses. i have come to the home of tony romo, the dallas cowboys quarterback, to have a sleepover and see if we can become best friends. tony! how are you? nice to see you. wow! you got a head start. already in your pajamas.
>> james: oh, cool. >> best friends, best friends, tony and james having lots of sleepovers, playing fun games >> james: if we were in "sex in the city" which character would you be? >> who's the one who sleeps around a lot? >> james: samantha. >> yeah, that one's you. >> james: oh! >> ( beep ) ( beep ) >> james: it's just a game! tony! anyone would think you'd never lost before. you lose all the time! chubby bunny. >> chubby bunny. >> james: chubby bunny. >> chubby bunny. >> james: chubby bunny. >> chubby bunny. >> you did good, best friend. >> james: well played, best friend. you want to hear the scariest
>> i do. >> james: i have never heard a story as scary as this. >> i'm in. >> james: it is 2015. okay? the city of green bay. some leather object is flying through the air. >> this is a scary story? >> james: a man jumps, grabs it from the sky, and suddenly, this black and white monster moves its head and says, "no catch!" >> i don't want to tell any more ghost stories. ( laughter ) >> james: good night, tony. best friends forever. >> ever and ever. >> james: i'm going to fall asleep. don't put my hand in a bottle of
is your head so congested it's ready to explode? you may be muddling through allergies. try zyrtec -d to powerfully clear your blocked nose and relieve your other allergy symptoms. so, you can breathe easier all day. zyrtec -d. at the pharmacy counter. if you're trying to be a little better... things just got a whole lot better. introducing entrees loaded with flavor, not calories. applebee's grill & bar favorites made a little better for you. featuring new dishes, all under 650 calories and starting at just $9.99. seems like we've hit a road block. that reminds me... anyone have occasional constipation, diarrhea... ...gas, bloating? yes! one phillips' colon health probiotic cap each day helps defend against occasional digestive issues. with three types of good bacteria. live the regular life. phillips'. (cell phone rings) where are you? well the squirrels are back in the attic. mom? your dad won't call an exterminator...
he says it's personal this time... if you're a mom, you call at the worst time. it's what you do. if you want to save fifteen percent or more on car insurance, you switch to geico. r it's what you do. where are you?r it's very loud there. are you taking at zumba class? all the hard work... time in the service... community college... it matters. it's why we, at university of phoenix, count your relevant work and college experience as credits toward your degree.
thank you all for being here. >> together again. >> james: together again. the boys, you have been here before. billy, it is your first time on the show. >> i was on the first show. >> james: in our film. thank you very much for doing that. you're the best. >> this is so exciting. >> james: i understand there is you, who is particularly excited? >> one of my grandchildren, she is 9. dylan. harry was so kind and spent applause ) it was great. he was so nice. she came over and i said, "what did he say?" what's a prenup? >> that's not what i said. >> james: you guys, you have been all over the place. you were just in london and you played the royal variety show in front of the royal family and here we have a picture here,
look at this, when harry met harry. here you are here. is this true? prince harry asked a question, harry, that i am wondering. he asked about your hair. >> yeah. >> james: and where are we going with it at the moment? when is it going to stop? >> to the nipples. need nine inches to be able to make a full-- >> james: you're going to do it so you can do a photo with your top off but with your hair over your nipples like kate moss? >> holding a dog. >> james: i will tell you what hairstyle you might want to go for. here is a young billy crystal. ( applause ) look at this guy! billy, this is beautiful. >> i was 22. >> our age. >> james: same age? >> james: you spent time with the royal family. right?
together. wasn't there a time where you-- >> i met princess di at a command performance of "when harry met sally." it was a royal premiere at the beautiful theater. i sat on her right and meg ryan sat on her left. we were on the balcony and the trumpets bring her out. she was so magnificent. she was so great. the lights went down and she whispered to me i'm taking my shirts off, so schmucko goes i'm taking my pants off. she laughed. we come to the orgasm scene. >> james: of course, you get to the fake orgasm scene. >> and i didn't tell her. she didn't know. she is a princess. >> james: yeah. >> and it starts and the
every head turn. to see what she was going to think of the scene. she started laughing like this. now you're me and i'm princess di. ( laughing ) she has that laugh. i'm thinking if it was a date, i would never see her again. she has that laugh. >> james: incredible. >> very incredible. beautiful. couldn't have been more charming to us. spent a lot of time with us and it was a magnificent memory for me. >> james: i thought you were going to say she laughed like that and you said i'll have what she's having. daniel craig said the other day he doesn't know if he is going to do another bond movie but he said he thinks niall horan would make a great james bond. ( applause ) what do you think?
about. basically, i was interviewed and we were asked what we were going to do next year and i said if daniel craig is not doing it-- is not going to do another movie, i would take his spot. then that same people that interviewed, as a joke, the same people that interviewed, interviewed him went and asked what he thought and he said i would be absolutely fabulous as james bond. and to be honest-- >> you have got to do thing now. you have to do the thing. gotta do it. >> james: give us the line. give us the line. hang on, wait. i'll be the villain. i'm the villain. >> you've got the chair for it. >> yeah, nice, nice. >> james: i'm the villain, and i'll say, "ah, who are you," and you say the name... >> action! >> james: hang on, i need someone to be my cat. louis, come and be my cat. ( applause ) that's it, nice. do like one of them, over the ear. >> someone is dying over there,
>> james: ah! >> well, well, well. >> james: no, the cat doesn't talk, louis! ( cheers and applause ) >> okay, okay, okay! i got too into it! >> retake! >> i'll just stick to the script. >> james: cat! it is a cat! this is a serious audition for him. okay. >> action! >> james: okay. okay. all right. ah, i have been expecting you. what is your name? >> the name's bond, james bond! ( applause ) >> james: oh, my god! ( cheers and applause ) this is huge! i think we have witnessed not one but two things here. niall will be playing james bond and louis tomlinson will be about to open a brand new cheers and applause ) that's the truth, yeah? speaking of performing, liam, is this true?
some karaoke? >> i was out with my family and this one-- i can't help myself. it is fun. i got up and sang a song. >> james: what did you sing? >> i sang "ordinary people." >> james: john legend? >> the legend himself. a guy turns to me and goes, "great voice, kid." >> james: guys, you have made five albums in five years. ( applause ) a phenomenal success. and a punishing schedule, let's be honest. and you are now about to take a bit of a break. a hiatus. louis, what are you plans for the break? >> i think we're kind of all in the same boat because the schedule has been so crazy. it's going to be really nice to kind of not have plans. so, really, just normal things, things that we have not been able to do, like spend plenty of time with our family and our