Skip to main content

tv   Late Night With Jimmy Fallon  NBC  January 17, 2014 12:36am-1:37am PST

12:36 am
thanks, folks! goodbye! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you!
12:37 am
hey! welcome, everybody. thank you so much! way too nice, the show is not that good. [ cheers and applause ] maybe it is. we have a great show. welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everybody. thank you for being here. thank you for watching at home. i appreciate it. [ cheers and applause ] we have a great show tonight. here's what people are talking about. the oscar nominations came out today. [ applause ] they've got some great movies up for best picture this year including "gravity," "her," and "american hustle." or as may mom calls them, "dr. from e.r. in space," "the guy who talks it his voicemail," and "your father used to dress like that when we were dating." [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: all good movies. >> jimmy: got to go, i got to go. i got to go. this is what's going on in washington. of course, everyone's talking about the speech from president obama where he talks about edward snowden and how he wants to stop leaks like that from happening ever again. well he actually hasn't given
12:38 am
the speech yet, i just found it online. [ laughter and applause ] it looks like it's going to be good. really good. and get this, new documents showed the nsa looks at 200 million text messages every day. or as teens eating dinner with their families put it, "lightweights." [ laughter and applause ] this surprised me a little bit. first lady michelle obama is making news over a recent interview where she said that she is not ruling out plastic surgery or botox in the future. when asked to comment, barack was like, "nope." [ laughter and applause ] nice try, nice try. nope. she want to, she can. she doesn't need it. [ laughter ] here's some more political news. in a new interview, donald trump said there's a 50/50 chance that he'll run for governor of new york. [ audience groans ] [ booing ] people are psyched. people are all excited. [ laughter ] just like that, yeah, yeah. i haven't heard a hiss in years.
12:39 am
i don't know -- [ laughter ] >> steve: we should record that and use it in movies later on. >> jimmy: well, just in case he does decide to run, he's already been testing out several campaign slogans. take a look at them. first one is, change you can comb-over. [ laughter ] next slogan, it's time to give the people what i want. [ laughter ] that's good. and finally, a serious classy run at governor. not at all a publicity stunt for "the apprentice." [ laughter and applause ] i get it. i get it. i like trump. >> steve: yeah, trump's a nice guy. >> jimmy: cool -- but he's a weird dude. [ laughter ] >> steve: he's odd. >> jimmy: he's fun. remember he was here on the show, and we did like a -- >> steve: oh, the car -- the boat. >> jimmy: looked like a remote control boat race. and he was following his boat around. and i go, "dude, it's a remote control." [ laughter ] i saw that former "bachelorette" stars trista and ryan sutter just celebrated their tenth wedding anniversary. [ applause ]
12:40 am
yeah, ten years. ten years. that beats the second longest "bachelorette" marriage by about ten years. ten years. [ laughter and applause ] of course the super bowl is coming up very soon. and organizers for the big game say that security will be so tight this year, the only thing fans will have to worry about is if their team wins. [ laughter ] and then they said, and if you're from new york, not even that. [ laughter and applause ] you don't have to worry about anything. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: and if you're planning on having a super bowl party, listen to this. the price of snacks, like chicken wings, has actually gone down 10%. so finally good news for chris christie. [ laughter and applause ] great, psyched. finally, he's waiting for it. a little good news. more football news. nfl commissioner roger goodell just said that he's open to the idea of players using marijuana in states where the drug is legal. [ laughter and applause ] then players were like, "yeah,
12:41 am
way ahead of you." [ laughter and applause ] thank you, appreciate it. don't worry about it. i think this is actually a good thing. there are reports that southwest airlines is being pressured to break ties with seaworld after reports that its animals are mistreated. southwest plans to respond as soon as it finishes herding its passengers back into their flight cage. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: get up, get in there. get on in. get on. i can fit two more of you in here. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's a weird story right here. this week, country singer trace atkins was on a country music themed cruise when he got into a fight with a trace atkins impersonator. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: it was a nasty brawl. in fact, i heard it took five elvises to pull them apart. [ as elvis ] hey come on, man. i don't want no fight, man.
12:42 am
[ normal voice ] [ laughter and applause ] i was watching my man, dr. oz, yesterday. love dr. oz. he actually had or pal, cameron diaz on the show, and was doing a strange activity with his audience. check this out. >> everyone in the audience here has a little piece of clay. you have that? i want you all to mold your most recent poop with that clay. let me see your poops. hold your poops up. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: what? what? [ laughter ] was it brown clay? >> jimmy: one guy was like, i didn't get any clay, but here you go. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: that's a baby ruth. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: hey, if you're on facebook listen to this. a new study found that more than 11 million people have quit facebook in the last three years. [ applause ] unfortunately, none of them were your parents. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: you get any of my posts, son? i posted you a couple times.
12:43 am
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: finally, new research found that having a drink every day can hurt your memory. or as that's also known, the point. [ laughter and applause ] we have a great show today, give it up for the roots everybody, lets go! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, man! [ cheers and applause ] it's a show. we have a fun, fun show tonight. he is the host and musical guest this weekend on "saturday night live." drake is here tonight! [ cheers and applause ] i love that guy. >> steve: he is a delight. >> jimmy: hey, if you don't know, higgins is the producer on "saturday night live." how is he? >> steve: excellent. >> jimmy: he's great, right? >> so fun, the read through was fantastic. he's going to surprise you. >> jimmy: really? >> steve: he's that good. he's that good. i'm going to go on record. >> jimmy: your voice changed -- [ higgins impression ]
12:44 am
he's that good. listen, a lot of people say drake just is a rapper -- >> steve: not just a rapper. >> jimmy: he's an entertainer, performer. [ laughter ] >> steve: he does impressions. he's an entertainer. >> jimmy: an entertainer. [ laughter and applause ] that's gonna be great. i'm going challenge drake to a game called beer hockey. [ cheers and applause ] we saw it online. it's a combination of air hockey and beer pong. it's very fun. [ laughter ] all the kids are doing it. >> steve: i don't think they are. >> jimmy: also from the very funny show, "suburgatory," our pal ana gasteyer is stopping by. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh my! what! >> jimmy: ana gasteyer was my first friend at "saturday night live." >> steve: yeah? [ audience aws ] >> jimmy: when i first got to the show i was nervous. i was walking around, i had weird pants on. [ laughter ] it was wearing like carpenter, it was almost worker, carpenter pants. it had things so you can hold a hammer in your paints. [ laughter ] >> steve: like painter pants but more -- >> jimmy: i never carry a hammer around with me. that would just be weird. unless i was a carpenter or someone who worked on things.
12:45 am
i've never touched a hammer as long as i live. but anyways -- >> steve: 'cause you can't touch that. ♪ [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. ♪ but i saw ana gasteyer was walking down the hall, and i'm freaking out i'm like, my gosh, ana gasteyer,i totally -- i love her, she's awesome. and she came up she's like, "hey, i'm ana. you're one of the new guys, it's going to be fun." oh my god, i was so nervous. she took me out to dinner, it was really nice. made me feel comfortable. i was like, oh my god this is crazy. i'm part of the cast now. i'll never forget it. and then she told me one thing i'll never forget. she told me to get a wooden salad bowl. [ laughter ] she says, 'you should get a wooden salad bowl." i go, "why?" she says, "you make oil and vinegar and it soak into the wood, then every salad tastes better the more you make salad." and then eventually you can eat the bowl. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: really? >> jimmy: i made the last part up. also we have great music from -- you got to see the guitars.
12:46 am
you see the guitars in this? this band has got, besides the captain kirk signature guitar there from gibson. right there. >> steve: oh beautiful, beautiful guitar. >> jimmy: they have the coolest guitars. neon trees are here tonight! [ cheers and applause ] so fun, oh! hey, guys. it's time for "late night hashtags." here we go. ♪ hashtags hahstags hahstags hashtags hashtags ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you guys are on twitter, right? [ applause ] super fun. well, we use twitter our show every single week. so if you watch our show, you ought to play along, we do this every week where i send out a hashtag. we ask you to tweet things based on that topic. so since the new season of "the bachelor" started up -- i love "the bachelor." i started a hash tag called "awkward date." i asked you to tweet out a weird, funny, or embarrassing story about an awkward date that you've been on. we got thousands of tweets. in fact, within a half-hour, it was a worldwide trending topic. so thank you for those tweets. [ applause ] appreciate that. now i thought i'd share some of
12:47 am
my favorite awkward date tweets from you guys. here we go. our first is from @drcostlow. he says at the end of the date i went in for a hug, then she ducked out of the way and gave me a high five instead. there you go. [ laughter ] >> steve: oh my god. >> jimmy: that's weird, right? >> steve: not good, yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this one's from @kdravessissy. she says, we went to the movies and he lightly stroked my pinky with his pinky for the full 120 minutes. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: i don't know, somebody stroking your pinky. that's not a bad date. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this one's from @gskewedview. he says, had a date once where halfway through dinner i noticed a piece of paper in her lap titled "conversation topics." [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: how about that obama? [ laughter ] >> steve: how about that war in europe? [ laughter ] that's an old one. >> jimmy: an old date. >> steve: that was an old one. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: war in europe.
12:48 am
my god. this is from @kaykatie. she says, i was at the movies with a guy, i offered him popcorn he said, "i don't eat popcorn, it makes my lips bleed." [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: i think that's when you go, "i'll be right back." and leave. >> jimmy: then you split, yeah. [ laughter ] no second date there. >> steve: or go to a different movie. >> jimmy: popcorn makes my lips bleed. >> steve: it makes my lips bleed man. if you want to eat that crap, it's okay, but -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: crap. [ laughter ] if you want to eat that crap, it's up to you. [ laughter ] this one's from @globalhighfive. that's good name. she says, "my date said, "i love how you just don't care about the way you look." [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] that's what i love about you. >> steve: love about you, man. most people love to be in shape. you don't care about it. i mine, it's great. you got the self-confidence. i couldn't do it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. this one's from @sashanotsofierce. [ laughter ]
12:49 am
>> steve: that's cute. >> jimmy: she says, he took me to taco bell and said i could order anything i wanted as long as it's under $5. there you go. [ laughter ] chivalry's not dead. >> steve: it's alive and well in that gentleman. >> jimmy: this one's from @iambennythejet. doesn't quite make sense. >> steve: i am benny the jet? >> jimmy: 'cause it's benny and the jets. >> steve: benny and the jets. >> jimmy: he was never -- he wasn't a jet, ever. [ laughter ] >> steve: no. he didn't play professional sports either. >> jimmy: no. i haven't kept up with benny, but i'm assuming. >> steve: i mean, i don't know. >> jimmy: can we google it, see if benny became a jet? [ laughter ] maybe now they're just probably the jets? >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: and they sing, "you got it all" ♪ ♪ you got it all over here no, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] i love the jets, i love the jets. >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: anyways. iambennythejet. he says, "we were eating dinner by candlelight and my sleeve caught fire. so my date started throwing spaghetti on me to try to put it
12:50 am
out." [ laughter and applause ] this one is weird. this is from @frozenlabgod. >> steve: frozen lab god. >> jimmy: whatever. [ laughter ] he says, one girl told me she was 50% attracted to men and 40% attracted to women. i said, "that leaves 10%," she said, "i know." [ laughter and applause ] robots? >> steve: robots? rumbas? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this one's from @lucyswitt. she says, a guy i'd gone on four dates with said, "i love you." i said, "me too, wait, no i don't." [ laughter ] there you go, that's awkward. [ cheers and applause ] that's "late night hashtags." to check out more of our favorites go to latenightwithjimmyfallon.com/ hashtags we'll be right back with drake, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ whistle blows ]
12:51 am
[ girl ] can we get a little help? focus fellas. we've got pepsi. what if we just take like 15 minutes? halfway through the game? they've got pepsi. [ whistle blows ] ♪ oh, yeah, yeah ♪ oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah so what do we call that? halftime. i like halftime. [ male announcer ] even the first halftime wasn't halftime without pepsi. because it's not football without halftime. and it's not halftime without pepsi. the start of sneeze season and the wind-blown watery eyes. that's why puffs is soft. puffs plus are dermatologist tested to be gentle and they lock in moisture better. so you can always put your best face forward. a face in need deserves puffs indeed.
12:52 am
because getting more is what you get... with mcdonald's new dollar menu and more. all your favorites are still here, plus a whole lot more. for just a dollar get the crunchy, tangy, brand-new bbq ranch burger. and, for only two bucks... bring home the thick-cut applewood smoked bacon, on the new bacon cheddar mcchicken. only on the dollar menu and more. ♪ there's something for everyone to love at mcdonald's. ♪
12:53 am
thit's an invitationr everyone to stop and savornald's. the unmistakable taste that reminds us that life is delicious. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. yeah. everybody knows that. did you know there is an oldest trick in the book? what? trick number one. look-est over there. ha ha. made-est thou look. so end-eth the trick. hey.... yes.... geico. fifteen minutes could save you... well, you know.
12:54 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest is a grammy award-winning artist. we love this guy. here's his album right here. [ cheers and applause ] he's a grammy award-winning artist and actor you see this weekend as host and musical guest on "saturday night live." please welcome back to our show drake!
12:55 am
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you can't beat this guy. drake, welcome back to our show. >> thank you. >> jimmy: congrats on this. three nominations for grammys on this guy right here. oh, my gosh. >> thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: very -- it's amazing, right? >> this is crazy because this picture makes me realize i like shaved for the first time today since like "degrassi." and like -- and like -- lorne was like, "you should probably shave." and then like, i'm walking down the hallway and some guy was like, he was just in passing like, "we love our clean-shaven boys here." i was like that's probably not even like the best welcome. this was at "snl" by the way. >> jimmy: weird. >> this is upstairs at "snl." >> jimmy: who was that person? >> i don't know but they should start doing background checks on people. [ laughter ]
12:56 am
>> jimmy: that's weird. you came on our show, and i don't want to influence "saturday night live" i said, "dude, this guy should host." you came out and were so fun and good. how's it going up there? are you nervous? >> i mean, it's going -- it's like yesterday i did the read-through. and it was like probably one of the best days of my life, man. it was incredible. and you did influence it 100%. because obviously, they listen to you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you came on the show but i was like, "this guy can do it all. he's great." >> man, yeah, it's going to be great. >> jimmy: you read the sketches? you sit down on a what was it, wednesday? read through the whole thing. you read through like 50 sketches or something. >> yeah. you read through a bunch of sketches, and some good, some not good -- yeah, but i mean yesterday was all laughs. like at a table with some of most talented people in the world obviously. and it was just incredible, man. just like to finally like pick the show and realize what we're going to be doing, and i get to play all these characters. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i'm really -- i'm excited about it. i was going to ask, do you have advice for me?
12:57 am
>> jimmy: gosh. just trust the writers. they great. seth is up there and colin jost is great. kenward is good, all of those guys and higgins will take care of you. just know that when -- when the show goes, you know, to air, it -- it's much shorter than -- you'll practice 12 sketches, right, maybe eight make it to the show. >> this is like the conversation we have like before we come out here. >> jimmy: yeah. yeah. it's not that interesting, but it is to you. oh, you'll have the best -- i love "snl" so much. i mean i'm obviously a giant fan, growing up. just worshipped that show. i used to watch it religiously. >> right. >> jimmy: and my favorite part is good nights. >> good nights. >> jimmy: because the band plays the music, and it's kind of sad in a weird way because you go like, we'll never have this again. >> right. it's live. >> jimmy: whatever we did, it happened. >> yeah. >> jimmy: you can't redo. it not pretaped. it's live. and you're so happy and exhausted but yet exhilarated. you feel almost like after like you get like -- i feel like a boxing match or something like where if you win a boxing match, let's do it again. come on, we'll do one more round
12:58 am
because it's fun, right? and you'll have -- you'll have a good time. >> i'm excited. >> jimmy: did you grow up watching "snl"? >> i did. i love "snl." my favorite skit was like goulet -- i don't know if you remember robert goulet. >> jimmy: of course. will ferrel. >> man favorite one was obviously i group up listening to rap. clearly -- i don't know if any of you realize it. [ laughter ] but my favorite was when he had jay-z on. and jay-z had no lines. he was like -- [ jay z laugh ] [ applause ] like will ferrell was carrying the whole thing. goulet! and he would be like -- >> it was crazy. >> jimmy: yeah. will is one of those guys that makes you crack up. you'll see when you do it live. it's like -- do you have a straight face, or do you break up easy? >> no. we ran through two of the sketches today. i hung in there. it's so funny. >> that's the problem with me. clearly, i have the worst time.
12:59 am
i'm not a great actor. but i'm sitting there, and you're working with the funniest human beings on the face of the earth. i'm so lucky to be -- >> did you say you are not a great actor. you are a great actor. >> jimmy: thank you. [ applause ] >> jimmy: that's nice. >> and a great man. >> jimmy: thank you. i really appreciate that. well, you're a good actor, as well. you spent a lot of years on "degrassi." >> i did. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: now, explain "degrassi" for people who don't understand. this is a canadian show. yes? >> i thought you were going to be like, "explain what are you wearing here." terrible, terrible. >> jimmy: it's like four shirts in one shirt. a multi-type of shirt. all these guys -- a tank, a tee. >> i was a multilayered teenager. >> jimmy: love that. this is the first audition you ever went on, right? >> that is. oh, yeah. man. i should probably tell this story. i never told this story before. that was the first audition i went on, and it was like a real pivotal day in my life because it was the first audition i went on, so that's already like a monumental thing. but, it was also like the day
1:00 am
that finally got accepted by like these really like cool jewish kids at school. [ laughter ] and they were finally like, "yo, come over." this kid, daniel pearlman, by the way, i'm sure he's going to be at home just like bumbling -- i don't know. >> jimmy: what's going on? don't say anything incriminating. >> that's probably like he's doing right now. i don't know where he's at, like ten years later. he's probably at home like -- that was my impression of him. >> jimmy: that's pretty good. >> yeah, thanks. >> jimmy: daniel pearlman -- you do the best daniel pearlman. absolutely. hands down. that's a famous impression. everybody does daniel pearlman. fantastic. >> yeah. so anyway, he called me to his house, and like it was the -- i had this like really like tug-of-war moment where i actually did something that i probably shouldn't have done that starts with a "w" and ends with "eed." and -- >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah, yeah. yeah. so, yeah -- >> jimmy: really?
1:01 am
had you done it before? >> no. that was my first time. we did it out of -- start with a "b" ends with an "ong." so, it was crazy because i started really getting paranoid. i thought i had just completely ruined my life. i was like splashing water on my face constantly, it was like a clearasil commercial or something. in the bathroom like this -- constantly. >> jimmy: they always splash water on their face. i love it. >> but it was like ten clearasil commercials. so, anyway, i showed up to the audition and like got just a little less paranoid. and went in and did -- did what i could and was like devastated. i couldn't tell my mom. and i ended up getting the call back and getting the role. so, i don't know. [ cheers and applause ] what that means. but -- >> jimmy: but, kids if you're watching -- >> i was going to say, that's actually the reason why i -- like i keep all my work very separate from those two words
1:02 am
that we spelled. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. you can't work 100% on that. >> no, i don't understand people that can actually go out on stage like under the influence of anything really. i have to -- to be straight and clear minded. kids at home. >> jimmy: see, that's good. very nice. very good. [ cheers and applause ] you held up -- i found this picture online, and i thought it was kind funny. there's baby drake right there. [ audience aws ] >> that's also my business card, by the way. >> jimmy: and i had an idea. i would love to challenge you to a game of beer hockey. >> i'm going -- can i tell you something? first of all, you're one of my favorite people in the entire world. second of all, i will -- any game ever in life, i'm here to play. >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. i love it. drake and i will play beer hockey when we get back. come on back, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
1:03 am
is your hair so dry... it's for the birds? discover the all-new look of triple nutrition from garnier fructis for a total transformation. the nourishing formula restores hair with every use. get touchable-softness and spectacular shine. fructis triple nutrition
1:04 am
we had a crv and then we had the pilot. you got more with the ford escape... i'm glad we got the escape and we switched. yay! for me, it was driving the ford escape... it's that foot-activated liftgate... and i don't have to do all this... yeah, i'm filling up a lot less than i did with my honda... woooh! if you were to compare the honda crv to this... i definitely like the ford better... awesome! (laughs) [ everyone's favorite flavors, different at red lobster? new table for two. with two salads... two entrees... plus an appetizer or dessert to share, all just $29.99. offer ends soon! so come to red lobster and sea food differently. it's not the "fumbling around with rotating categories" card. it's not the "getting blindsided by limits" card. it's the no-game-playing, no-earning-limit-having, deep-bomb-throwing, give-me-the-ball-and-i'll-take- it-to-the-house, cash back card.
1:05 am
this is the quicksilver cash card from capital one. unlimited 1.5% cash back on every purchase, everywhere, every single day. so let me ask you... what's in your wallet?
1:06 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. i'm here with the one and only drake. he's host and musical guest on "saturday night live" this weekend. we're about to play a new game that we call beer hockey. we saw a version of it online and had to create our own to try it. it's the perfect combination of two of my favorite games, beer pong and air hockey. >> two of your favorite games. >> jimmy: they really are, yeah. [ light laughter ] kids love it. they're great games. the rules are simple, if your puck lands in your cup, you have to chug the beer. first one to three wins -- yeah we specially made this. we spent like days making this. this is what we do here. first one to three wins.
1:07 am
you ready for this? >> i'm ready. yeah, let's do it, man. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you very much. [ cheers ] ♪ [ audience oohs ] >> it's all right. you go. you serve one up. that's okay. i might even just give you one off the wrist. that's how confident i am. >> jimmy: really? >> that's how i'm feeling. >> jimmy: oh! ♪ >> whoa! >> jimmy: yes! >> there you go. >> jimmy: "snl" is going to be rough this weekend. >> that's definitely real beer, by the way. just saying. ♪ oh, this is terrible. >> jimmy: whoa! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: beer! ♪
1:08 am
oh, my gosh. drake, you're from canada. >> yes, i am. >> jimmy: you have to win at hockey. >> no, i love beer and hockey. that's the whole point. >> jimmy: i know. >> oh, how did that not go in? yeah, this -- there we go. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i was mad about that one. i kind of lost my head on that one. i'm ready. >> i don't know where it's going. i'm ready to put it back. no. oh. you go ahead. you go. [ laughter ] >> what is that -- hold on. are we counting that? >> jimmy: what do you mean? >> that was like -- >> jimmy: you want a slo-mo replay of that? >> yeah can we -- yeah, no. this is under review 100 percent.
1:09 am
>> jimmy: yeah! that counts. ♪ i'll do one with you. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] drake everybody. check him out. "saturday night live" this weekend. ana gasteyer joins us next. come on back, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ this is like having thanksgiving every day. i know, but better because it's not thanksgiving. the hotel wasn't nice to your father. we're staying here. when's dinner going to be ready? ok, yeah. i think you would have a better chance of catching the football if you put the phone down! ahh! five-second rule. ahh! oh! yeah, this is much better. [ male announcer ] slow roasted and carved thick. oscar mayer carving board gives you all the taste of the holidays, without all the hassle. it's holiday, any day food. it's oscar mayer. that's the angel's share.
1:10 am
but a richer bourbon stays trapped in the wood. we've made history by extracting it. devil's cut from jim beam. and the rear seats in the dodge durango fold down perfectly flat. and you know what that's for. huh? ♪ ♪ classical piano [richard] last year,thinking they can do their own taxes, americans left behind more than a billion dollars. that's five hundred dollars on every single seat. not just in this stadium, but in every professional football stadium in america.
1:11 am
this is your money.get it back with block. get your billion back,america. the rich dark chocolate. york peppermint pattie. get the sensation. ladies... kitchen counselor. it's likely your detergent. cascade platinum's triple cleaning formula delivers brilliant shine finish gel can't beat. it even helps keep your dishwasher sparkling. cascade platinum is cascade's best.
1:12 am
1:13 am
1:14 am
♪ >> jimmy: you know our next guest from her half a dozen seasons on "saturday night live." and now you can see her on the abc comedy "suburgatory" airing wednesdays at 8:30 p.m. ladies and gentleman, please welcome my pal, ana gasteyer! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> hi! >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. >> that's what i'm talking about. >> jimmy: ana, welcome back to the show.
1:15 am
>> thank you so much. >> jimmy: you look gorgeous. >> thank you. >> jimmy: how's the family? everyone good? >> the family's great. everyone's great. yeah. >> jimmy: i follow you on instagram. >> you do? >> jimmy: yes and i saw this photo of your daughter. little frances. >> that's frances, yeah. >> jimmy: come on, what is this thing? >> i thought she was doing her homework. then this little dapper man came in and told me she had to stay up late. >> jimmy: this dapper gentleman came in -- [ ana doing a voice ] >> "i think frances needs to stay up late and watch a movie." [ laughter ] [ jimmy doing the voice ] >> jimmy: "i want to watch a movie. i want to watch 'the croods.'" >> i want to watch "the croods." so this is a good disguise 'cause really, i thought it could be the landlord or -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah you never know who that was. a strange person. you were nervous at first. >> i was nervous. he was so put together with a bowtie and such. >> jimmy: yeah, absolutely. and a short man. >> a very short man. >> jimmy: he's a jockey maybe? >> i brought you a little something actually. i find it amusing that you like that because actually i asked frances to make you one. because i know you like disguises. >> jimmy: i really do. >> this one has a little -- >> jimmy: frances? >> this has a little soul patch.
1:16 am
[ laughter ] so your extra -- [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: can you dig it? they got the beat, man. that's all cool. i dig. now look, check it out. right now. look, i want stay awake and watch "the croods." do you dig? that cool? all right, cool man. real cool. can you dig it? flippy, on the flip side. flippy on the flip side no one says, right? >> you said that. kind of genius, right? frances -- >> jimmy: does frances know who i am? does frances watch the show? >> vaguely. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: at least you're honest, yeah. >> she doesn't watch the show. i told her -- i just thought you should have -- >> jimmy: you lied. you stole this from frances and gave it to me. >> i'm already stealing bits from my children. >> jimmy: you really are stealing bits from your kids. >> i mean who doesn't? >> jimmy: do you remember meeting me for the first time? >> i love you that were wearing carpenter pants. that's the cutest. >> jimmy: i really was wearing carpenter pants. >> yeah, well, you know -- yeah. >> jimmy: you don't remember that though, do you? >> i don't remember the carpenter pants. no, i don't. i remember the slide ruler and the --
1:17 am
>> jimmy: i've never had a slide ruler or hammer. >> i remember when you came, it was like everybody was so excited. you were so energetic and positive. we were all kind of tired. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, you were not. never, never, never. i know -- new year's resolutions come and go. >> it's a new year. >> jimmy: you have a new year's resolution that's a different one. it's a weird one. >> it's not that weird. i mean, i want to get more twitter followers. it's not really a resolution so much as a needy goal. [ laughter ] you know. >> jimmy: a selfish, needy goal. >> a selfish, needy goal. >> jimmy: you want more twitter followers. >> yeah. >> jimmy: why? >> because i -- i enjoy escaping from my family in the form of twitter. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: more of -- with reality. >> it's like when you shut down. you shut down. >> jimmy: you look great on twitter. >> oh, you're so nice. thank you. >> jimmy: you're really fun on twitter. because i have the best thing that made me really laugh. i have a lot of your tweets. it made me laugh. you got in a kick where you were obsessed with one direction. >> yes. my frances loves one direction. and i just think they're adorable. they're darling. >> jimmy: they're good. i love them. they're actually good. i like their songs.
1:18 am
>> they're darling. they're very catchy. and fun. so i -- >> jimmy: you don't have to act so square. they're very catchy and -- [ laughter ] >> it's real toe-tapping stuff. >> jimmy: it's toe-tapping stuff and i just love to turn it up. >> and i do. i just turn it up. it gets my booty bumping. >> jimmy: i guess i'll put on my a.m. radio. [ laughter ] >> i do. i've been trying to get their attention. i took frances to go see them at jones beach. and i tried desperately to tweet at them. this is why i need more followers because i need a critical mass. i want -- i really -- it's a little mary kay letourneau-ish, but i would love to meet -- [ laughter ] i would love to meet harry stiles. >> jimmy: i can't believe we got that. that's a good reference. oh, my god. >> i also like them to look out for themselves. i want harry to -- those pants are tight, they can get blisters. you know -- >> jimmy: harry wears tight slacks. >> he wears some tight slacks. he can chafe. >> jimmy: no chafing. you said -- you tweeted @harrystiles, "i am finishing some tax prep paperwork. free by 6:15. if you're in new york city and want to meet for a turkey patty
1:19 am
and/or #michelobultra." [ laughter ] >> i'm a weight watchers ambassador. >> jimmy: i love that you made that a hash tag. >> #michelobultra. >> jimmy: like that's ever gonna trend -- michelob ultra a hash tag. >> it might because it's only two weight watcher points. >> jimmy: is that right? >> i mean, harry knows he needs to watch out now, but let me tell you that will catch up to him fast. because i don't get the feeling that he's not involved in fitness apart from the dance. >> jimmy: ana, don't worry about his fitness, please? >> i am worried and i'll be honest, i'm also worried for the boys. i really am. they need to wear sun screen. they're very fair. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh my gosh, stop. >> they're all fair. i like to give them motherly advice. and also i'm attracted to them. anyway, go on. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: we got that. we got down to the nug-e-nug. >> and they were on "snl," which was like my one pathetic shot. my one in. >> jimmy: they were on "snl." >> they were on "snl." >> jimmy: if you have any pull -- >> if i have any pull anywhere in the it's possibly to show up at "snl" and see them. and i'm on an annoying, romantic getaway in istanbul with my husband. >> jimmy: gosh darn it! >> why do you have to take care of marriage all the time?
1:20 am
[ light laughter ] and my husband was asleep. i'm literally following them at 5:00 in the morning. >> jimmy: do they watch "snl?" do they watch? >> do they watch the show? >> jimmy: yeah? >> not so much. but they're little. ulysses is 5. i mean, try to show them -- >> jimmy: how old is frances? >> she's 11 1/2. i did show -- i showed them recently -- i did find things on netflix or one of them. and -- tony, my -- >> jimmy: one of them. you mean websites? >> one of those web channels, on the inner web. >> jimmy: something on the inner web. >> it's something on the inner web. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i was smirking really weird -- >> yeah. i mean, on my aol handle, i noticed -- yes, so i was -- tony, my gay best friend that i live with in l.a. when i'm doing "suburgatory." his favorite sketch is "hot air mystery balloon theater." and do you remember that? i don't remember any sketch i was in, for the record. so please, don't ever hold it against me, when you come up and say, "i loved when you did the funny hair woman." >> jimmy: you don't remember. >> i have no idea what you're talking about. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i remember -- >> it was called "hot air mystery balloon theater." >> jimmy: did mike schur write that? >> i'm sure it was schur or
1:21 am
carlock or dennis. yeah, and it was a murder mystery that was set on a hot air balloon. [ light laughter ] there were a bunch of us. it was a huge cast -- >> jimmy: was i in it? >> i think you might have. we all had like monocles and were like -- [ ana doing a goofy voice ] i think it could have happened there. >> jimmy: it's a tiny basket. >> it's a tiny basket and at one point they had run out with the bad guy and he had the gun, and we're like, "catch him! catch him!" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he was running around the basket trying to catch a theif. yeah. [ ana doing a goofy voice ] >> who could have done it? >> jimmy: i don't know. and you're working with parnell now? >> yes. we played husband and wife. >> jimmy: come on. i love chris parnell. >> it's like 20 years of light marriage for ana gasteyer and chris parnell. >> jimmy: you know him from the groundlings. >> yeah. we have played the uptight white couple. herschel used to call us the uptight whites. >> jimmy: really? >> you have to do a dance. like -- ♪ the uptight whites the uptight whites ♪ yeah. we always -- where are you when you do that? >> jimmy: now you're on "suburgatory," and you're husband and wife. >> we're husband and wife. we have a great time together. we're very -- insane couple naturally. >> jimmy: i want to show
1:22 am
everyone a clip of ana gasteyer on "suburgatory." take a look. >> oh. guess who's back early? >> we cut our romantic weekend short because we fell in love with victor. >> what the hell is this? >> this is your new brother, victor. victor, we forgot to mention, we also have a daughter. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you're new brother victor. >> that's not her brother. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ana gasteyer, "suburgatory" airs wednesdays at 8:30 p.m. on abc. we love you pal. come back whenever. neon trees performs next. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ verizon innovators are creating
1:23 am
air and soil sensor networks that help use water wisely, so american farms can keep growing for generations to come. because the world's biggest challenges deserve even bigger solutions. powerful answers. verizon. at subway! [ male announcer ] where january is now januany, and any regular footlong is now a $5 footlong. even low-fat favorites like the sweet onion chicken teriyaki! ♪ $5 footlong ♪ januany, any [ male announcer ] subway. eat fresh. ♪ januany, any [ male announcer ] can't take a sick day tomorrow. [ coughs ] [ male announcer ] so he can't let a cold keep him up tonight. vicks nyquil. powerful nighttime 6 symptom cold and flu relief. ♪ yo,move fast fruit flavor,fe, watermelon, blue razz green apple. your taste buds dancing. it's the jolly rancher, we make it happen.
1:24 am
untamed fruit flavor. jolly rancher. [ mom ] time for breakfast. [ male announcer ] mary larson will never forget the fateful morning that deliciously simple made her a believer. she couldn't believe she could pronounce everything in it. ♪ and she couldn't believe her daughter chose pancakes over her phone. you're being weird! [ male announcer ] new deliciously simple from i can't believe it's not butter! with 100% taste and zero artificial preservatives. it's time to...believe. we're gonna be late. ♪
1:25 am
♪ ♪ oh are we early? [ male announcer ] commute your way with the bold, all-new nissan rogue. ♪
1:26 am
1:27 am
[ man ] yo buzz! drop that beat! remix! ♪ hey! must be the honey! ♪ ♪ ♪ you got that medley crunch ♪ go! go! buzz! ♪ go! go! go! buzz! ♪ hey! must be the honey! ♪ ♪ clusters, flakes ♪ that medley crunch, crunch! ♪ clusters, flakes ♪ that medley crunch, crunch! go! ♪ ♪ ♪ hey! must be the honey! ♪ ♪ hey! you got that medley crunch ♪ ♪ hey! must be the honey! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, guys, come back tomorrow night. he is a hilarious comedian and star of the movie "ride along" kevin hart will be here tomorrow night. plus -- [ cheers and applause ] really funny guy. plus, the host of a new reality competition show, "under the gunn." tim gunn will be dropping by. make it work.
1:28 am
make it work people. and we have music from jhene aiko. it's really, really fun. you don't want to miss that. but our next guest will release their now album, "pop-psychology," on april 22nd. tonight they're here with the first tv performance of their single "sleeping with a friend." please welcome them back to our show. we love them. neon trees! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ all my friends they're different people anxious like the ocean in a storm ♪ ♪ when we go out yeah we're electric coursing through
1:29 am
our bodies 'til we're one ♪ ♪ and why mess up a good thing baby it's a risk to even fall in love ♪ ♪ so when you give that look to me i better look back carefully ♪ ♪ cause this is trouble yeah this is trouble i said ooh ooh you got me ♪ ♪ in the mood mood i'm scared but if my heart's gonna break ♪ ♪ before the night will end i said ooh ooh we're in danger ♪ ♪ sleeping with a friend sleeping with a friend ♪ ♪ all my friends stay up past midnight looking for the thing to fill the void ♪ ♪ i don't go out
1:30 am
much like i used to something about the strangers and the noise ♪ ♪ and why leave when i got you baby it's a risk but babe i need the thrill ♪ ♪ i never said you'd be easy but if it was all up to me i'd be no trouble hey we're in trouble ♪ ♪ i said ooh ooh you got me in the mood mood i'm scared ♪ ♪ but if my heart's gonna break before the night will end ♪ ♪ i said ooh ooh we're in danger sleeping with a friend ♪ ♪ sleeping with a friend we are both young hot blooded people we don't wanna die alone ♪
1:31 am
♪ two become one it could be lethal sleeping with a friend all my friends ♪ ♪ all my friends all my friends all my friends ohh i said ♪ ♪ ooh hear ooh you got me in the mood mood i'm scared ♪ ♪ but if my heart's gonna break before the night will end i said ooh ooh ♪ ♪ we're in danger sleeping with a friend sleeping a friend all my friends ♪ ♪ all my friends if my heart's gonna break before the ♪ ♪ night will end i said ooh ooh we're in danger
1:32 am
sleeping with a friend ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: awesome. thank you so much. neon trees! "sleeping with a friend" is available on itunes right now. we'll be right back, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
1:33 am
so you made some bad decisions last night. make a good one this morning. get two biscuit sandwiches, with your choice of country grilled sausage, egg, and cheese, or bacon, egg, and cheese, both on my new southern style biscuits. you'll save some cash 'cause right now they're two for just three bucks. c'mon cody... let's get some breakfast. you drive. i traded the car for the tattoo.
1:34 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to drake, ana gasteyer, neon trees! [ cheers and applause ]
1:35 am
and the greatest band in late night, the roots, ladies and gentlemen, right there! [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "carson daly" thank you for watching. have a good night, hope to see you tomorrow. bye-bye, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
1:36 am
♪ >> carson: hey i'm carson daly. "last call" is on. thank you very much. we got a great show for you coming this evening. we're here at evr in new york city. i got dominic cooper who's a great actor, music of icona pop and more. but first, we mark the return of one of our favorite "last call" guests. he's here to talk about his epix world premiere comedy special entitled "patton oswalt: tragedy plus comedy equals time." we love this guy. from edendale in silver lake, here's patton oswalt. >> one of the first paying jobs i've ever had was i worked at a company in sterling, virginia called sounds unlimited. it was a dj company. wedding dj's, events, stuff like that. we were not the top company in the area. i think we were the last company

229 Views

info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on