tv The Late Show With Stephen Colbert CBS October 26, 2017 11:35pm-12:38am PDT
morning at 4:30. >> we'll have all the news you need to start your day. good night. captioning sponsored by cbs >> and now yet another the "late show" exclusive. stephen colbert's interview of lou dobbs interview of president trump. >> stephen: mr. president, thank you for sitting down with me. we're besties. >> we have a very good relationship. >> stephen: before we start, do you mind if i edit this interview to make you look -- >> absolutely ridiculous. >> stephen: exactly. thank you for understanding. first question, recently republican senators mccain corker and flake have all spoken out against you, implying you're an unhinged danger to the country. >> one of the great disasters of all times. dihonest. >> stephen: so you've heard what they've said about you.
anything you can do to make them >> i c . >> stephen: i'm no that's appropriate or welcome. moving on, last week there were rumors that instead of your actual wife melania standing next to you it was a body double. is there any truth to that? >> we actually have six prototypes that are all very top of the line. >> stephen: good to know. can we get personal for a moment, sir? here's a photo of you playing tennis. how would you describe thisiary? >> massive. just massive. >> stephen: that seems accurate. now, mr. president, how do you think the country's doing under your watch? >> it has taken a nose dive. >> stephen: is that because of your poor leadership? >> i know when i do well and when i do badly. >> stephen: and have you ever done well? >> um, no. >> stephen: thank you. >> announcer: it's the "late show" with stephen colbert! tonight, trump's sizzling media feed. plus, stephen welcomes: julianne moore. jermaine fowler.
and a musical performance by fleet foxes. featuring jon batiste and stay human. and now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, it's stephen colbert! ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: hey, everybody! please, have a seat, everybody! >> thank you so much! good to see ya! ladies and gentlemen, please. welcome to the "late show." i'm your host, stephen colbert. ( cheers and applause ) you know, sometimes i feel sorry for donald trump, but not as often as he does. ( laughter ) he's always complaining about his media coverage. so, last night, he just
unplugged, got away from it all and sat down for his 19th interview with fox news. in this case, it was a full rubdown from anchor and unrefrigerated lou dobbs, lou dobbs. >> in nine months in office, you've already accomplished more in the way of job creation. you have accomplished so much in that nine months. you've got to be immensely gratified at what you've been able to do. you are, if i may say, everything as advertised as you ran for president. and i appreciate everything you're doing. the country owes you a great debt on so much. but on that, in particular, and i-- >> that's very interesting. it's well put. it's true. ( audience reacts ) ( booing ) >> jon: wow. wow. >> stephen: it's going to be a long night. >> jon: whoa! >> stephen: i'd say that dobbs
was lobbing softballs, but if that interview is any indication, he doesn't have balls. ( laughter ) ( piano riff ) ( cheering ) keep it light. got to keep it light. dobbs was pleasuring trump so vigorously that mike pence asked mother to change the channel. ( laughter ) >> jon: oh! >> stephen: oh, oh! >> jon: oh! >> stephen: even dobbs' criticisms were praise. >> and i've got to ask you, i mean, you're one of the most-- i would say, by the left, particularly -- reviled, even hated men to ever hold your post-- >> i would say so. >> you're also one of the most loved and respected-- >> i would say that also. >> stephen: so you would say that you are one of the most hated, and you would also say you are one of the most loved?
so would you say that it is safe to say that you would also say anything someone just said? >> i would say that also. >> stephen: trump then explained how terrible the media's coverage of him is. >> i know a good story from a bad story. but when you have a really good story and they make it bad, i'll say to my wife, "oh, tonight, i'm going to enjoy watching television because i did great, and wait until you see this." and then, they put it on and it's like-- oh, that's not so good. >> stephen: sir, you've got to stop watching my monologues. ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) because, i'm here to say, "you're not so good." "you're not so good." ( piano riff ) dobbs was so massaging trump's, let's say, ego, that he didn't get around to asking trump about puerto rico, where three quarters of the residents are still without power. the repair job to the grid and
power plants is a $300 million contract, and it's been awarded to a company called whitefish energy. which really sounds like a trout-based boner pill. ( laughter ) (as old man) "i thought my love life was over. now, thanks to whitefish energy, i'm spawning upstream!" ( laughter ) thank you very much. ( piano riff ) i don't know what that means. i don't know what that means. some are questioning whether whitefish can handle this massive job since they are "a two-year-old company from montana that, as of a month ago had just two full-time employees." so restoring puerto rico's shattered infrastructure requires the same manpower as moving a filing cabinet upstairs. now this is true, our research department tried really hard to find out who those two employees are and we couldn't. we found one of them: andy techmanski.
so their tech man is named andy "tech-manski?" ( laughter ) that is made up. i'm guessing the other guy is irish. "seamus o'therguy." ( applause ) he seems nice. he really seems nice. seaseamus really seems like a ne guy. o'therguy. one thing we did learn is that buzzfeed went to whitefish, montana, looking for the company's headquarters, eventually finding a small cabin in a forested area-- and i believe, a composite sketch of their third employee. there he is. yeah. chilly, this time of the year. this time of the year, you want a little -- >> jon: look a hoodie. >> stephen: fun fact, this controversy was first reported by weather.com. it's has to be the most unlikely
scoop since watergate was broken by the "piggly-wiggly" sunday circular. ( laughter ) ( applause ) so why would this tiny company located in the woods of montana win a massive contract to fix puerto rico? well, it didn't hurt that whitefish energy is based in whitefish, montana, the hometown of interior secretary ryan zinke, and that zinke's son had a summer job at one of the company's construction sites. well, there's a co-inky-zinke! plus, it turns out it was a "no-bid contract." no competition. none. that's like the last guy on earth naming himself "people's" sexiest man alive. ( laughter ) double issue. it's a double issue. you find out all about him. favorite pastimes, staring. scrounging for canned goods.
( laughter ) now, the mayor of san juan, and woman who did not sign up for this stuff, carmen yulin cruz, has demanded that the contract be voided for ethical reasons. to which whitefish replied, tweeting, "we've got 44 linemen rebuilding power lines in your city and 40 more men just arrived. do you want us to send them back or keep working?" oh, snap! ...is what all of the power lines in puerto rico did, so stop bitching and get to work, andy techmanski, if that is your name -- which it is not -- you know -- a smattering of techmanski fans here tonight. ( laughter ) there have been a lot of stories about sexual misconduct over the last couple of weeks, and-- brace yourself-- now it's come out that even "george h.w. bush has acknowledged he groped multiple women." oh, come on. not him. he's the bush we like! ( laughter )
he's a 93-year-old grampa who's been married to the same woman for 72 years! what is that? that's the uranium anniversary. ( laughter ) no one makes it that far! it's the unobtain-uim anniversary. so is it every guy? who's next? colonel sanders? papa smurf? "air bud?" hey, there's nothing in the rulebook that says a dog can't play basketball and then ask a production assistant to come to his trailer and check him for ticks. if you know what i mean... ( laughter ) and i don't. ( laughter ) here's the story. actress heather lind said on instagram that while taking a photo with bush, sr., he grabbed her butt while telling her a dirty joke. and then, a second actress said "yeah, me too," and revealed the joke, "do you want to know who
my favorite magician is?" "david cop-a-feel!" ( laughter ) ( audience reacts ) that is not good. i feel bad as a human being but even worse as a comedian. ( laughter ) because that is not a believable joke. no one has a favorite magician. ( laughter ) ( piano riff ) now, here's the deal -- i think he feels bad. lind has since deleted her post, and h.dubya has apologized through his spokesman: "on occasion, he has patted women's rears in what he intended to be a good-natured manner. some have seen it as innocent, others clearly view it as inappropriate. to anyone he has offended, president bush apologizes most sincerely." adding, "at this time, the former president respectfully requests that you back it up like a tonka truck." ( laughter ) words to that effect.
i'm paraphrasing. ( laughter ) speaking of republican dynasties, there's one member of the trump family people respect: ivanka. she's gotten a ton of praise from the right for her poise and intelligence. at the same time, it turns out, she doesn't know what words mean. this week, on twitter, vice writer eve peyser compiled a list of all the words ivanka has used incorrectly, and it's a real fortnight. ( laughter ) for example, when talking about her and jared's morning routine she said, "my husband has incredibly long hours, so i try to keep mine on a relative basis." ( laughter ) you think she'd know how to use "relative," because her whole career is on "a relative basis." ( laughter ) >> jon: oh! ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: turns out -- and we've known this for a little
while -- she also doesn't have the strongest grasp of the word "complicit." >> if being complicit is wanting to be a force for good and to make a positive impact, then i'm complicit. >> stephen: it doesn't mean that. ( laughter ) but, benefit of the doubt, she might've just been trying to make a point and actually knows what it means to be complicit. >> i don't know what it means to be complicit. >> stephen: okay. here's one from twitter: "i cannot believe that theodore is eight months old today! happy birthday." >> stephen: happy birthday? he's eight months old! ( applause ) either ivanka doesn't get how birthdays work, or do rich people get more birthdays than we do? ( laughter ) ( applause ) and then there's this gem.
"cuddling my little nephew luke, the best part of an otherwise incredible day!" ( laughter ) that is a dumb statement in an otherwise stupid tweet. ( laughter ) ( applause ) ( piano riff ) happy birthday! now, a lot of people have made fun of ivanka online for this, but i'd like to say something in her defense. jim. i'm a little bit complicit with ivanka here. if complicit is heretofore defined as "i support her," which it timelessly doesn't. laugh i know this all seems humorous but, albeit, it is not. ivanka rises at the apex of sunshine and does a lot of good on a relative basis. in fact, the entire trump family is a big part of an otherwise great country. ( laughter ) ( applause )
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( cheers and applause ) oh, jon. i know, you go to church, go to love and serve the lord. i do as much as i can. >> jon: yeah. >> stephen: i like to go to confession when i can. when i can't, what i like to do is sell my new book this is stephen colbert's "midnight confessions!" i'll give you some of the examples. sometimes i wish i had more health problems because the people in pharmaceutical ads have more picnics than i do. >> jon: wow. >> stephen: yeah, all of that and more is right in here. get it for a friend. get it for an enemy. let them feel some of the guilt you're feeling on my behalf. >> jon: that's right. >> stephen: here's the thing, i'm so busy, even when i try, i don't get to confession as often as -- at all. ( laughter ) so if y'all don't mind, i'd like to confess to you, my audience.
you won't tell anybody, right? >> audience: of course not! >> stephen: this is stephen colbert's midnight confessions. ( cheers and applause ) ( open door ) ( laughter ) standard disclaimer: i don't know if these are technically sins, but i do feel bad about them. okay, wait right there. ( closes, opens door ) ( organ music ) softly playing ) forgive me, audience... at last week's high school reunion, everyone was whispering to each other, "i didn't know stephen colbert went to our high school." ( laughter ) i didn't. ( laughter ) i told my kids that the ice cream man only plays music when
he is all out of ice cream. ( laughter ) ( applause ) when i worked at an office supply store, i used to steal paper. ( laughter ) it had pictures of presidents on it. ( laughter ) last week, i did a really bad job singing "who let the dogs out," and it upset everyone at the funeral. ( laughter ) i buy family-sized bags of potato chips, but only when my family's not around. ( laughter ) ( applause ) sometimes i pee in the shower...
( laughter ) display at home depot. ( laughter ) audience -- audience, at my last checkup, my doctor said i needed to make some serious lifestyle changes. so i changed doctors. ( laughter ) ( applause ) i fall asleep on long car rides, sometimes even as a passenger. ( laughter ) when the flight attendant asks if i'd be willing to help in an emergency, i say yes. but in my mind, i'm thinking, "if we crash land on an island, i will eat you." ( laughter ) ( applause ) i will eat you. it's a compliment. on our first date, my wife asked me if i played any sports. i answered honestly and said "hackey sack." i still don't know why she went on a second date with me. ( laughter )
one time, audience, i tried to commit all of the seven deadly sins, but i was too lazy to get past sloth. ( laughter ) i only recently learned that chapstick is for your lips. ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) that really paints a picture, doesn't it? ( laughter ) forgive me, audience? >> audience: we forgive you! >> stephen: thanks! we'll be right back with julianne moore. ( cheers and applause ) ( band playing )
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( cheers and applause ) ( band playing ) >> stephen: hey, ladies and gentlemen! ( cheers and applause ) welcome back to "the late show." folks, my first guest tonight is the academy award winning actress you know from the "the big lebowski," "game change" and "still alice." her new film is "suburbicon." >> um, what was that word? excuse me? you said it all boiled down to one word? >> did i? oh, yes. yes. it all boilsz down to one word-coincidence. that happens in the opera a lot. >> coincidence. yeah, it gets ridiculous. but in real life, doesn't happen that much. >> i guess if it did it would stop being a coincidence. >> it's not the policy, it's the claim. a coincidence on a claim is like a little red flag that makes us sit up and take notice and this claim has a bunch of little red flags on it.
>> what kind of red flag? >> stephen: please welcome julianne moore! julianne >> hi! ( cheers and applause ) my goodness! >> stephen: it's lovely to seeio. >seeyou. lovely to see you, too. >> stephen: any movie you're in, i say, julianne moore is in that! >> again. >> stephen: welcome back to the show. you're such a wonderful actress. you've got your oscar, your emmy, but you've got an interesting honor coming up i think about two weeks from now. i just got an invitation. you're being honored by moma, the museum of modern art is
honoring you. >> yeah. >> stephen: how does it feel to be considered modern art? you're a site-specific installation. >> it hasn't happened yet, so i'll figure it out when i get there, i guess. >> stephen: do you have to do anything? >> once i'm installed. >> stephen: yeah, you want a nice simple frame around you. >> maybe the sculpture garden. >> stephen: that would be lovely. >> yeah. >> stephen: getting cold. getting cold, exactly. uh-huh. >> stephen: well, you know, i know it must be fun for you because i know you live in new york. >> i do, yeah. >> stephen: but are you from new york? >> huh-uh. >> stephen: okay. my dad was in the army so we moved all around the united states and lived in europe. >> stephen: how many places as a child did you live? >> i went to nine different schools. i don't know how many places. i think we moved 23 times altogether. sounds like bad news, right? >> stephen: and nine different schools. so for 14 of those you got no
education. >> that's right. >> stephen: it must be a challenge as a child to make all the changes, but you got to reinvent yourself. did that help you be an actress? >> you get observant and adaptable. >> stephen: did you lie when you got to the new place and make up stories about your past? >> no, no. ( laughter ) >> stephen: are you lying to me right now? because i would do that. wouldn't you? i had so many fantasies as a child, i would get to move to a new town. i would say, yeah, well, my dad, he's in the mafia. >> that's right. ( laughter ) well, i had exotic moves. like i lived in alaska and moved to new york. >> stephen: that must have helped you. >> research, yeah. but people would say things like did you live in an igloo and that kind of stuff nu the answer, of course, is yes. >> yes! where else do you live in alaska? >> stephen: did you ever live in an igloo? >> yes! ( laughter ) no. >> stephen: no, you did not.
no. ( laughter ) >> stephen: besides alaska to new york, must have been a huge culture shock. was that the biggest, sort of? >> no, we moved to germany from northern virginia when i was 16. and i had never been on a long international plane ride. it was an old army plane so it took 14 hours and you're so excited and don't sleep and i would have to get up and go to the bathroom and stand in there for a while and look at myself in the mirror and say, oh, my god, this is happening. >> stephen: how old? 16. too old to be too dramatic about it. >> stephen: did you pick up any deutsche? >> i leonard little german but it's not very good. >> stephen: can i ask you about a great role you played,
sarah palin. >> yeah. ( applause ) >> stephen: did that seem like such a calm and simpler time for this country? >> it seems absolutely adorable because that was just like a little near miss, like whoops! >> stephen: is there anybody in the present political climate you would like to play? like, oh, i want to be that person? >> no, i don't think we're finding any of this very entertaining, right? ( cheers and applause ) ( piano riff ) >> stephen: well, you don't have time for any projects right now because you're awfully busy. you're here for two movies right now. >> that's right. >> stephen: "wonder struck" but also "suburbicon" which comes out tomorrow. >> right, on the hallow weekend.
>> stephen: do you dress up? i dress up every day. ( laughter ) no, actors, i feel like as an actor the last thing i want to do is dress up. >> stephen: it's a bussman's holiday. >> exactly. >> stephen: you play twins in this one, identical twins, which you've done before. >> yes, i've had experience with twin playing. >> stephen: could you tell the people you experience playing twins before. >> i played twins on "as the world turns," first big job starting out. ( applause ) they were half sisters and cousins, which is kind of disgusting because it means their moms were sisters and they had the same dad. >> stephen: they're identical half sister coz sentence. >> yeah, you got it. >> stephen: but i think is the plot of the patty duke show. >> i think so. >> stephen: and do we still have this? we have a clip of you playing your own twin. >> i have been trying to find
you for months now. >> why have you been following nee? what do you want? >> i just wanted to find you. i saw you for the first time in customs at heathrow. now that you see how alike we are, i'm sure you understand why. >> why have you been threatening me? >> i haven't. don't believe you. yo>> you have no reason to be frightened of me. ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: beautiful. two distinct, completely distinctly different characters. >> wow, talk about halloween, huh? >> stephen: yeah. i could go as those guys. >> stephen: but which one? maybe the one at the window, triplets, the shadow. i want to sell tickets to "suburbicon." i understand there is a fairly
spicey scene in the moy between you and matt damon that involves a ping-pong table. >> yeah. >> stephen: can you explain to us the challenges of shooting a spicey scene and how does the ping-pong paddle. >> somebody is smacking someone with a ping-pong paddle. i just had to make the noise, not participate in the stunt part. matt damon just hit himself because -- that's how he likes it. >> stephen: in the movie if we see a butt, it's matt damon's. >> he was trying to spare hitting me and hitting himself and didn't realize he was bruised until he got home. >> stephen: hard to explain. yeah. >> stephen: lovely seeing you.
happy halloween. "suburbicon" in theaters tomorrow! julianne moore, everybody! we'll be right back with jermaine fowler! do join us! ( cheers and applause ) ( band playing ) i was a good soldier. i had purpose and i loved it. you are my hammer out there. ♪ i'm only human... don't let these young guys see you fold. thank you for looking after my son. we're brothers, we look after each other. thank you for your service. rated r. it's time to stack the savings. at kohl's, take 50% off hundreds of select items storewide. plus - take an extra 20% off. plus - take an extra $10 off when you spend $50 or more. plus - get kohl's cash. plus - yes2you members earn triple points. only at kohl's.
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( cheers and applause ) ( band playing ) >> stephen: welcome back, everybody! ( cheers and applause ) ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is an actor and comedian who currently stars in "superior donuts" on cbs. please welcome jermaine fowler. ( cheers and applause ) ( band playing ) >> stephen: nice to see you again. people out there might not know but we work together about six weeks ago, eight weeks ago,
something like that? >> yeah. >> stephen: you were the announcer on the emmys. >> i was. >> stephen: have a great time? great time, yeah. ( cheers and applause ) had a great time, man. >> stephen: i had way more fun than i thought, too. >> yeah! >> stephen: those things generally are a drag, especially when you lose, which i did. ( laughter ) >> that was school seeing -- that was cool seeing you backstage. >> stephen: you were on the fun side of the stage. i was on the back side of the stage. you were by the red carpet. if somebody won, they came right by you. >> that was so cool, i got to see the actors, emotions raw, holding those damn trophies. i saw donald and shock, lena, nicole kidman -- she's gorgeous -- and it was so, so cool, man. >> stephen: because everybody is actually going to be super cool about it but then they get the award and they're all (bleep). >> yeah. >> stephen: you also had a bar on your side.
>> yeah. >> stephen: you had a bar. ean spicer was stressed out for whatever reason. he's not working anymore, so -- ( laughter ) he don't work there anymore and he's still getting drunk. so funny to me. so i saw that. ( laughter ) he had a problem. i'm back there, like, trying to figure out whose names not to mess up, you know. julia louie dreyfus is hard to say. it sucks. >> stephen: that's the one name you knew you had to say. >> i know. i said i hope she doesn't win because i'm going to mess it up. i knew i would mess it up. >> stephen: you should have had said, elaine from "seinfeld"! ( laughter ) congratulations to you. you got better than an emmy.
you got a brand-new baby daughter. ( applause ) what's your baby's name. >> her name is ti bay. >> stephen: how is she in this photo? >> she looks 25. >> stephen: she does. he's three months. she has a personality. it's crazy. she knows what the cameras are. picture, she goes, aaaa -- i go, who are you? it's cool, man. being a dad is insane. >> stephen: has it changed you in any way? >> yeah, it has. i have a daughter, like, everything about me is, like, my whole point of view has been changed. i'm more emotional now. >> stephen: oh. yeah, i am. like, now. i'm very emotional. i really am. i've cried during movies i've never cried during. i've cried during "taken." i've never tried during "taken." >> stephen: they take his
daughter. >> they do. i'm, like, hope you get your daughter back, liam. i did that. >> stephen: did you think of acquiring a specific set of skills? >> i did, man. >> stephen: how old is she now? >> she's three months and some change is that so she's knot moving around yet, she's still in the carrier, right? >> she's doing this stuff. she can't roll yet. >> stephen: that will come any day now. then she will be cruising and walking. have you started the process of baby proofing yet? >> what do you do? >> stephen: put plug covers. oh, plug covers! >> stephen: put little pads on the corner of your glass coffee table. you put locks on the kitchen cabinets so they can't get to the delicious windex. >> no, i grew up poor. we didn't have proofing. my dad would just tell us, don't do that, and leave. >> stephen: that works, too. don't touch that! >> stephen: right.
but i was a very imaginative kid growing up. >> stephen: do you have brothers and sisters? >> yeah, a twin brother named jerome and a sister named yashika. the only non-j. i'm from maryland so it would rain a lot. ( cheers and applause ) serious? i want to grab your hand so bad. hi, how you doing? oh, man, that's cool. it would rain really hard some times. all i would do is open the windows in the house so the water would come through and pretend i was in a pirate ship. ( laughter ) so me and -- >> stephen: and your parents knew this? >> no, they weren't home. ( laughter ) jerome and i would be, yarrrr! the ship is sinking, what do we do? he would go, yarrr, we have to plug the holes of the ship in the bow! my mom's room was the bow. i saw her dresser, and we opened
up the drawer to get some tools and found her vibrator. i didn't know what a vibrator was. >> stephen: i still don't. till don't. i told jerome, yarrrr! you found the magic tool, plug the holes with the magic tool! >> he went around plugging the holes. i jumped off the couch and hurt my back. i said fix my back with the magic tool, yarrrr! he's like, yarrr! i said, yarrrr! keep on going! i hope that never happens to her does a -- ( applause ) yeah. >> stephen: yeah. o proof your house, please. >> stephen: yeah, definitely proof your house. nice to see you again. >> thank you. >> stephen: "superior donuts"
returns monday 9:00 on cbs. we'll be right back with a returns monday 9:00 on cbs. we'll be right back with a performance by fleet foxes. t cd's, baseball cards... your old magic set? and this wrestling ticket... which you still owe me for. seriously? $25 i didn't even want to go. ahhh, your diary. "mom says it is totally natural..." $25 is nothing. abracadabra, bro. the bank of america mobile banking app. the fast, secure and simple way to send money. they can fly... ...travel at the speed of light... ...and command the currents. they don't need another way to get around. or do they? [ engine revving ]
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>> stephen: ladies and gentlemen, here performing "fool's errand" from their album "crack-up," fleet foxes. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ i knew you fine sight dream of mine ♪ but i know my eyes they've often lied ♪ and i move like blood like fire and flood despite you ♪ blind love couldn't win as the facts all came in ♪ but i know i'll again chase after wind ♪ what have i got if not a thought?
presented by target. food has the power to transform lives. with the help of target, the san francisco marin food bank addresses hunger head-on in the community. our food pantries are vibrant. people feel welcomed, and they're being respected. it helps our team members see the work that they do in the store every day...
how that actually relates to their communities. cbs eye on the community is sponsored by target. my name is jamir dixon and i'm a locafor pg&e.rk fieldman most people in the community recognize the blue trucks as pg&e. my truck is something new... it's an 811 truck. when you call 811, i come out to your house and i mark out our gas lines and our electric lines to make sure that you don't hit them when you're digging. 811 is a free service. i'm passionate about it because every time i go on the street i think about my own kids. they're the reason that i want to protect our community
and our environment, and if me driving a that truck means that somebody gets to go home safer, then i'll drive it every day of the week. together, we're building a better california. ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: well, that's it for the "late show," everybody. tune in tomorrow when my guests will be dr. phil and captain scott kelly. now stick around for james corden and his guests, dustin hoffman and kenneth branagh. good night! captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org some fun. some fun. ♪ and feel the love tonight. htdon't worry. ♪ it will be all right. ♪ it's "late, late show." ♪. >> ladies and gentlemen, all the way give it up for you