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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  September 12, 2016 11:34pm-12:37am PDT

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>> well finally tonight it will be the first teresa of las vegas for millions of tourists. >> yes, mccarran revealed their first mosaic at the airport. >> what did you call fame. >> a beautiful display of art, it's nice to welcome our [ cheers and applause ] ?? >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his guests -- renee zellweger --
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and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 531, eastern nebraska! woo! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ?? ?? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, thank you very much! hello! looking good! looking good! [ cheers and applause ] ?? >> jimmy: hey! enjoy yourself. hey, thank you! welcome! i feel the love right there. i feel the love. that is fantastic. [ cheers and applause ] it makes me feel so good. thank you very much, everybody. welcome, welcome, welcome to "the tonight show." this is it. [ cheers and applause ] you're here.
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it's a big show, tonight. we're gonna have fun. but, first, here's what people are talking about. you guys, the nfl season kicked off this weekend. it was exciting. [ cheers and applause ] and i read that two starters for the buffalo bills missed the team bus to the game, had to take an uber -- [ laughter ] to the game. the uber driver said, "good luck with your football game." and they said, "and good luck with baseball, tebow." >> steve: wow. [ laughter and applause ] wow! >> jimmy: guys, here's the latest on the election. back a comment she made about trump supporters last week. a lot of people were really upset about this. take a listen. >> you know, to just be grossly generalistic, you could put half of trump's supporters into what i call the basket of deplorables. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] [ crowd boos ] so, if you're keeping track, trump supporters are deplorable, and hillary supporters are deportable. [ laughter ] just so you --
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>> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: but of course, the big story right now is that hillary was just diagnosed with pneumonia. and to everyone's surprise, trump has refused to attack her while she's sick and even said, yeah, that he hopes she feels better. at which point, people started asking trump if he was feeling okay. [ laughter and applause ] "maybe you should lie down, mr. trump." "i hope she's taking a lot of liquids" -- [ laughter ] "staying hydrated." [ laughter ] i guess trump really doesn't want -- does want her to get better because today he sent her some flowers and a basket of deplorables. isn't that nice? >> steve: really? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's great. he's thoughtful. [ applause ] >> steve: that's beautiful. >> jimmy: i'm not sure what happened here. watch this thing. a trump adviser named jack kingston went on a cnn panel this weekend to discuss the elections. and i've got to say, he seemed just a little stiff. take a look at this. >> this is exactly the reason that 115 republican defense specialists are supporting secretary clinton and not having anything to do with
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the kind of unhinged statement that he makes. [ laughter ] weakened our international policy and shows a blatant lack of support for our allies in south korea. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "don't move!" to be fair, that's actually the best comment on the election i've seen so far is, like "i -- i -- i don't know." [ laughter ] "i don't know what's going on anymore." [ laughter ] hillary's campaign saw that, and was like, "just unplug him and plug him back in. it happens to us all the time." [ lauger some entertainment news, the film "sully" was a huge hit this weekend. and now, federal investigators are protesting the film because they say it makes them look like the bad guys. then geese were like, "how do you think we feel?" [ laughter ] our friend barbara got sucked into an engine, and somehow we're the bad guys here. [ laughter ] i heard about a new movie coming out that chronicles president obama's first year at columbia univertsity called, "barry." yeah, it's 104 minutes long,
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introducing himself to his roommate. [ laughter ] he's like, "uh, my name is uh -- barry." [ laughter ] "i like to hang out on the beach. my favorite fruit is an apple." ?? [ applause ] remember that? a callback to his old joke that no one liked the first time we did it. [ laughter ] hey, in case you guys missed it, last night was the "miss america" pageant in atlantic city. and like always, at the it's usually a quick sentence about themselves. but this year it, seemed like the contestants were really into geography. take a look. >> from the state with the highest number of lightning strikes in the nation, i'm coming in hot. i'm courtney sexton, miss florida. >> we have over 580 organic farms, this field is the real deal at riley fields, miss vermont. >> over 80% of my state's land is owned by the u.s. government. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what?
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>> jimmy: meanwhile, miss colorado was like, "i don't even remember where i'm from, but" -- [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: 420! >> jimmy: it's like each of them -- it's like each of them just googled their state right before they went on camera. [ laughter ] it's like, "i'm from the great state of tennessee, which is 900 feet above sea level." [ laughter and applause ] what? that's not a stat that anyone knows. guys, get this. the company behind mr. clean is holding an open castg for a new mr. clean. and i saw that women are welcome to apply. so if you know a woman who you think looks like mr. clean -- [ laughter ] it's probably best to not say anything. >> steve: yeah. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: let her figure it out. "hey, judy, anyone ever tell you" -- >> steve: "hey, honey." >> jimmy: "you look like mr. clean." >> steve: "what are you so mad at?" >> jimmy: finally, i want to say congratulations to
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[ cheers and applause ] amazing match. afterwards, he actually stopped by "the tonight show" offices, and we had a pretty intense match of our own. check this out. >> hey, guys, i'm here with "2016 u.s. open" champion stan wawrinka. [ cheers and applause ] wawrinka? >> doesn't matter jimmy. >> jimmy: jimmy. today, we're going to go head to head in a game of tennis, but we're going to do it the old-fashioned way, like real men. i'm talking about "nintendo wii tennis." are you ready to do this? >> always ready. >> jimmy: here we go. who's serving? okay. ready? yes! this is good. this is feeling real good! [ laughter ] >> why did i ever come here? >> jimmy: this is so fun. >> this is stupid. i win the "u.s. open" last night, and then i'm losing here. >> jimmy: oh!
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did you see? smoke came off of my tennis ball. gosh, this feels good! ah! oh, my god! embarrassing! >> this is embarrassing. >> jimmy: i'm totally embarrassing -- >> embarrassing. >> jimmy: game! jimmy fallon! >> ace from jamie. ace from jamie. >> jimmy: jimmy. jimmy, not jamie. [ laughter and applause ] >> hey, it's not moving. [ bleep ] [ bleep ] >> jimmy: this is it. this is for the whole game. oh, smoke! >> no! >> jimmy: yes! ha, ha, ha, ha! oh! oh, oh, oh, oh! oh, my goodness! [ cheers and applause ] you win, you lose. yeah! yeah, but did you have the best time of your life? >> i wish, but i would never come back again. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he's a good sport. we have a great show, tonight. give it up for the roots,
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?? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: stan wawrinka, what a a great guy. >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: good sport. guys, it's monday. we're so happy to be back. we've got a giant week of shows coming up. shailene woodley will be here. [ cheers and applause ] jason aldean, kevin james, and bon iver will all be here, then on thursday, republican presidential candidate, donald trump, will be joining us. [ applause ] following that, on monday, democratic presidential candidate hillary clinton will be here, so very exciting. [ cheers and applause ] guys, this friday's a special show. miley cyrus will be taking over the show. [ cheers and applause ] we called miley. we go, "do you want to do it?" it's going to be all miley, all show. we've got fun things planned with her. you don't want to miss that. but first, we have a fun show tonight. we're so excited to have her on
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if you love bridget jones, you're going to freak for this one. it's fantastic. i missed her. from the new movie, "bridget jones's baby," renee zellweger is joining us. >> steve: yeah! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: she's so funny. >> steve: a delight! >> jimmy: physical comedy is just -- she's great. later in the show, renee and i are heading into the ring to play a brand new game called, "heavyweight wrestling." i'm very competitive, obviously, yeah. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: she's so tiny compared to me, yeah. i'm going to destroy her. [ laughter ] plus he's one of the greatest nba players of all time, and the newest inductee to the basketball hall of fame. the great shaquille o'neal is here! [ cheers and applause ] shaq in the hall of fame, hall of famer. [ applause ] and we have great music from eric church tonight, you guys! look at this. [ cheers and applause ] eric church. guys, let's just admit it. we live in a brand-driven society.
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>> jimmy: the problem is, what makes a good name for one thing might make a bad name for something else, or make a great name for something else. with that in mind, it's time for a segment we call, "good name, bad name, great name." [ applause ] ?? first up, we have pumpkin spice latte. it is finally back in season. that is a good name for a a starbucks beverage. it's a bad name for a cologne. it's a great name for donald trump's skin color. [ laughter ] >> steve: really? [ cheers and applause ] pumpkin spiced latte. >> jimmy: pumpkin spiced latte. [ applause ] next up, there's virgin mobile. [ laughter ] that's a good name for a phone company, a bad name for a a dating app -- [ laughter ] a great name for tim tebow's car. >> steve: oh, i see. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you understand? >> steve: i'm now understanding it a little better. [ applause ] >> jimmy: here's another example. >> steve: oh, good. >> jimmy: we have "the neverending story."
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film -- [ laughter ] a great name for a phone call with my mom. >> steve: oh. [ laughter and applause ] and then, yeah -- i don't know if i'm going to have it again. i don't know, yeah. >> jimmy: i got in a big argument with my mom. >> steve: what about? >> jimmy: well, i guess on the show -- remember i was talking about -- who did we have on? we had -- talking about her mom-made cookies. mandy moore's mom -- >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: she made cookies and sent our demo tape. >> steve: yup. >> jimmy: i go, "oh, what are the cookies?" she goes, "peanut butter cookies with the hershey kiss in the middle." i go, "oh, my mom kind of did that. she made cookies. the middle, just a hole in the middle, and we had to imagine a a hershey kiss or something." [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: it didn't sit well with mom. [ laughter ] >> steve: how do you think -- >> jimmy: "i quit thinking, yeah. it was called santa's thumb print, and i put" -- she remembered the whole story. [ laughter ] >> steve: how did you think it was going to go? >> jimmy: i don't know. >> steve: did you think she was gonna go, "oh, that's great, jimmy." >> jimmy: yeah, exactly, absolutely. next we have -- santa's
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my mom -- i don't know if we have time. no, this is real. gourmet magazine or something? no, "bon appetit." >> steve: yeah, yeah, yeah. "bon appetit." >> jimmy: i think they called and said, "we'd love one of your mom's recipes, and we'll publish it in the magazine." i go, "okay." so i call my mom and go, "great news. 'bon appetit' wants to print one of your recipes in the magazine." "what? oh, my god. oh, my goodness." [ laughter ] "which one am i going to do?" i go, "i don't know, mom." she goes, i don't know, maybe my cheesecake." i go, "sure, cheesecake. that's great." so, she gives me the recipe. i sent it to "bon appetit magazine." so, they go, "all right, we're going to have to bring it to a a test kitchen to make sure that it really works, that it's good." so, they give it to the test kitchen. they call back, and they go, "it's fantastic. this is a delicious" -- they go, "can you ask your mom, did she get the recipe from anywhere, or is it a homemade recipe?" i call my mom. she goes, "yeah, hold on. i got it" -- oh, you hear paper rustling. "yeah, i got it out of 'bon appetit magazine.'"
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>> steve: ay-oh! santa's knuckle. >> jimmy: yeah, santa's knuckle. [ laughter ] next, we have hot pockets. it good name for a microwavable snack, a bad name for a pair of cargo shorts -- a great name for a kangaroo stripper. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: oh, thatno >> steve: "coming up next, hot pockets." >> jimmy: "put your hands together for hot pockets." >> steve: "and cinnamon." >> jimmy: after that, there's love shack. that's a good name for a song, a bad name for a jail cell. [ laughter ] >> steve: ay-oh! >> jimmy: a great name for shaq's e-mail signature. there you go. >> steve: oh! [ laughter and applause ] love, shaq. >> jimmy: "love, shaq." next up we have don't breathe. that's a good name for a horror movie, bad name for a vape store. [ laughter ]
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oh, i see. [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: "make it quick!" >> jimmy: finally, we have shake n' bake. that's a good name for a a breaded topping. it's a bad name for a cooking show, great name for snoop dogg during an earthquake. there you go, everybody. [ laughter ] that's all for "good name, bad name, great name." we'll be right back with renee zellweger! ??
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iating retrieval sequence. activating thrusters. target acquired. dang it! ah! come on! astronauts can vote from space. take a break from the election with red or blue tea.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, roots. our first guest is an academy in the highly anticipated new movie "bridget jones's baby," which is in theaters everywhere on friday. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the very lovely renee zellweger!
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>> jimmy: fantastic. welcome, welcome, welcome. please. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you look gorgeous. >> thanks so much. >> jimmy: thank you for coming back to the show. please. i love the movie. i want to get to the movie. i loved it so much. >> thank you. >> jimmy: but i want to know, 'cause you're from texas, right? >> yes. katy, texas. >> jimmy: katy, texas. yeah. [ cheers ] you're not from katy, texas. [ laughter ] what do you do in katy, texas? like if i was going to go visit and hang out with renee zellweger where would you take me? >> i can't tell you so much now because it's grown quite a bit. but back in the day we would go get cokes at the meat processing place right there on old katy road. >> jimmy: the meat processing place? >> yeah. >> jimmy: that sounds fun. >> it was. >> jimmy: they just processed meat. >> they processed the meats. we used to hang out at the whataburger a lot, in the parking lot. at the -- yeah there's that. you'd swim in the rice wells. that was pretty great. yeah, the rice wells are pretty
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and things like that but it was a lot of fun. >> jimmy: wow. doesn't sound like a great vacation. i don't know if i can -- >> football games. >> jimmy: is that right? oh football. >> football game. friday night. friday night lights. >> jimmy: oh, really? yeah of course, in texas it's a a big deal. >> yeah. >> jimmy: were you a a cheerleader? >> yes, i was a cheerleader. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you were? really? >> well, when i wasn't playing basketball or running track i was a cheerleader. >> jimmy: oh that's pretty fun. do you remember any of the cheers? >> you know it's funny that you'd ask me that because just the other day i was at a a stoplight and my seventh head. i don't know why. i mean that's crazy. isn't that crazy? >> jimmy: you remember it? >> yeah. that's why there's no room for new stuff, right? cause you download that forever. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all your -- why do i remember that and -- i forget my own cell phone number. yeah. but i remember that cheer. >> i remember that cheer. >> jimmy: is it be aggressive? >> you know we did that one. do you know that one? >> jimmy: i know that one. i wasn't a cheerleader, but -- they cut me. [ laughter ] >> oh okay. i got you. >> but i used to love that one. be. >> oh yeah. >> jimmy: aggressive. b-e aggressive. b-e a-g-g-r-e-s-s-i-v-e.
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>> i mean come on we're not the only ones that know that, right? >> jimmy: i love that one. >> that was a good one. [ applause ] now this one was the tiger team is the best yet, get ready get set. do you want to learn it? >> jimmy: then you did that after? yeah. there's steps for it? >> here we go. yeah. come on. let's go. let's go. let's go. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: are you sure? what aim doing? >> you're auditioning for the seventh grade cheerleading team right now. ready? >> jimmy: alrigh let's see. should i show it to you the first time? >> jimmy: yeah, let me see it once. >> okay i'll show it to you the first time. okay here we go. i don't know if you're supposed to do this in heels. but anyway. everybody wish me luck. alright, here we go, alright back to seventh grade cheerleader tryouts. ready? okay. get ready. get set. the tiger team is the best yet. get ready. get set. [ cheers and applause ] alright. you ready?
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you're good at it. >> are you ready? >> jimmy: yeah, i'll try it. i'll never remember this. yeah. here we go. >> okay, here we go. ready? okay, arms out, ready. >> jimmy: jimmy fallon. >> get ready, step out. >> jimmy: yeah. >> okay, and then -- okay never mind. here's what we're going to do. >> jimmy: okay very good. >> we're going to do a step clap. >> jimmy: already i'm bad? >> no, we're going to do the aggressive step clap. >> jimmy: alright, okay. >> it's get ready. get set. the tiger team is the best yet. >> jimmy: i have no rhythm. the tiger team is the best yet. hooray! fantastic. i'm bad on the beat. i'm bad on the beat. >> wait here, you can fix it. you have to do a kick. you can do a kick. if you do a good kick, it doesn't matter how the cheer goes. it doesn't matter. >> jimmy: i think i just did one. >> hang on one second. i have to do this. hang on. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh this is the real deal. this is awesome. >> this is going to get serious people. this is when we get serious. >> jimmy: this is the real deal. once the heels come off. forget about it. >> uh oh, forget about it. >> jimmy: now let's see if you're really going to teach me this. alright, i love this. >> guys, if you wonder why your wife needs a taxi. alright, here we go. >> jimmy: this is awesome.
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>> jimmy: okay yeah. >> you've got to go back like this and then you kick like that right there. okay? [ cheers and applause ] you go back and up. that's it. ready? >> jimmy: no. already i'm confused. >> yeah. okay, okay. back a little -- yeah! yeah! [ cheers and applause ] nice. nice. that was beautiful. >> jimmy: i pulled something. you are the coolest. thank you for doing that. that was so fun. >> my pleasure. you're all ready. you're ready to go. >> jimmy: i loved it, yeah. the movie. "bridget jones's baby." >> yes. >> jimmy: i loved it. i loved it. i'm so happy you did this movie. >> thanks. thanks, jimmy. >> jimmy: i'm so happy everyone's back. this plot is you're having a a baby. and is it colin firth's baby or is it patrick dempsey's baby? >> ooh. i can't tell you. >> jimmy: or maybe hugh grant's baby? we can't say. we can't say anything. but gosh, you made me laugh. you are so funny in this. >> thank you. >> jimmy: the physical comedy too was fantastic. i mean, i just love you. >> thank you.
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it. it was so much fun. it must have been a blast too. >> we had a great time. i love doing the physical comedy. seeing how absurd you can make something. >> jimmy: do you -- everyone must ask you. but there's no bridget jones in your life. like, do you trip and fall? >> oh, my goodness. all the time. >> jimmy: do you have -- >> all the time, i think that's why we all relate to her, right? we all have bridget jones moments in our lives. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, like give me a a good bridget jones moment that you've had that's renee zellweger. >> well i like to save mine for live television personally. [ laughter ] interview about a month ago in london. i think, yeah. in the middle of the interview. >> jimmy: you fell asleep? >> oh, yeah. i'm pretty sure i fell asleep. i was still talking but i wasn't present. [ laughter ] and when i came back to i was like, 'oh, wow you are still talking." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you fell asleep in your own talking interview? >> i did. i did. >> jimmy: what did the interviewer say? >> yeah, well, by the look on his face i think he noticed.
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>> jimmy: what are you talking about? oh, my gosh. >> yeah, that was a fun one. >> jimmy: that was a great one. >> i'll watch next month -- in a replay. >> jimmy: i want to show everyone a clip here. this is right here bridget just stumbled into the wrong tent at a music festival. i didn't want to ruin anything because it just -- it works, it works. here's renee zellweger and patrick dempsey in "bridget jones's baby." take a look at this. >> what i need is a good shafting. some good old-fashioned lie bonking. >> sign me up. >> oh, my god. what are you doing in my yurt? with all your clothes and luggage and possessions. >> yes. as if i've come in, made it my own. >> oh. sorry. >> since you're here, maybe i could help you. >> well, he is the first man i
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and his yurt is a heck of a lot nicer than mine. [ applause ] >> jimmy: come on. i miss her. i'm so happy she's back. you're great. [ applause ] would you like to play a fun, fun, fun, fun game? >> oh, yeah. what are we doing? >> jimmy: alright, it's called "heavyweight wrestling." here we go. renee and i are doing some heavyweight wrestling. so stick around it'll be interesting. it will be fair. it will be fair. [ cheers and applause ] ?? ?? there's only two left, you should masterpass that, now. hey dude. i masterpassed it.
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passed. oh jane, you're getting a ticket. nope, it's been masterpassed. what's with this one? i've taken care of the check, it's all masterpassed. masterpassed it. i masterpassed it. that was fast. because i masterpass. i take prilosec otc each morning for my frequent heartburn because you can't beat zero heartburn! prilosec otc: the #1 doctor recommended frequent heartburn medicine for ten straight years. one pill each morning. 24 hours. zero heartburn. you work at ge? yeah, i do. you guys are working on some pretty big stuff over there, right? like a new language for crazy-big, world-changing machines.
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?? [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: welcome back, everybody. i'm steve higgins, and it's time for the first edition of "tonight show heavyweight wrestling"! [ cheers and applause ] our first contender this evening is santa claus, also known as the host of "the tonight show,"
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?? [ cheers and applause ] sant's opponent for this evening is a robot. and starting this friday, you can see her in the new movie "bridget jones's baby," renee zellweger! ?? [ cheers and applause ] the rules are simple. the goal is to push your opponent out of the ring by any means necessary. no holds barred. if any part of your body touches the grouut ring, then you lose that round. you'll fight three rounds tonight. wrestlers, are you warmed up? >> jimmy: i'm ready. >> oh yeah. santa claus ain't coming to town tonight, jefe. >> steve: oh! >> jimmy: oh! >> steve: oh, wow! >> jimmy: you think i'm afraid of you? oh, snap! snap! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: snap! i got slapped. oh, it's on! >> steve: all right, take your positions. meet at the edge of the ring. >> jimmy: oh, get ready. i don't like to lose, man. >> you're taller than i remember. [ light laughter ] >> steve: three, two, one, go!
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?? ?? [ cheers ] steve: it's a close one! it's a close one! santa's pushing! now they're pushing, but robot is fighting back. santa goes to the side -- oh! oh! [ cheers and applause ] ?? robot takes the first round! [ cheers and applause ] robot takes the first round. santa, you need help? about. he let me -- he let me, didn't he? >> steve: you look like an m&m. >> didn't he? >> steve: how's your grandma? >> you let me have that one, didn't you? >> jimmy: no i din't. i -- >> you did. >> jimmy: you know what? i -- >> you were trying to set me up, so i get all confident. >> jimmy: you walked away from me. no, i got it. >> steve: all right wresterls, take a position. take your positions. >> jimmy: so, if i knock you out of the ring, i get a point, right? >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, get ready. [ laughter ] >> steve: three, two, one, wrestle!
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?? ?? >> steve: he's ropa-doping. ?? robot is using -- [ cheers ] ?? oh! ?? [ cheers and applause ] robot, round two! oh! oh! and is adding she's trying to hit his north pole. >> jimmy: oh, i hit it. you got to -- >> steve: whoa! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the winner right there. renee zellweger, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] we did it. >> you okay? >> jimmy: i'm out of breath. our thanks to renee zellweger, everybody! shaquille o'neal joins us after the break. [ cheers and applause ] stick around! [ cheers and applause ]
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?? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we are joined right now by a 15-time nba all-star, a league mvp, a four-time nba champion, an olympic gold medalist, and as of part of this past weekend a member now of the basketball hall of fame. please welcome to the show the most dominant big man to ever play the game. shaquille o'neal! [ cheers and applause ] ?? ?? >> jimmy: welcome back to the show. you know we love you.
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>> jimmy: boy-boy. yeah. you called me that nickname last time. you called me boy-boy. >> can i give a shout out to the roots? >> jimmy: you always can. absolutely. they're the best. >> give it up for the roots. really -- you fellas. [ applause ] >> jimmy: every time you come on the show, i don't know how many years that you've been coming on, we love having you on. i'm so happy for you in the hall of fame finally. shaquille o'neal's in the hall of fame. that's my nickname for you now, hall of famer. >> no. >> jimmy: hall of famer's not a a good nickname? >> no. hofa. hall-of-fame-a. hofa. >> jimmy: oh hofa, yeah. yeah, big hofa. >> jimmy: big hofa, good. i call you boy-boy, you call me hofa. >> jimmy: i'm boy-boy and you're big hofa. oh you know what i did for you -- >> hold on, hold on. let's practice. what up, boy-boy? >> jimmy: what's up, big hofa? >> how you doing boy-boy. good, real good, excellent. >> jimmy: do you love it when i call you that? >> yes, i do. >> jimmy: thank you. [ laughter ] i love it when you call me big hofa. okay.
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last time you were here we had a great, fantastic moment that i don't think you've ever had before. i decided to put it in a frame for you. you were in a phone booth with alex trebek. [ laughter ] and i just think that's something that'll just -- >> that's for me? >> jimmy: yeah, that's for you. because i figure you probably have photos of you dunking on people and winning all these awards. you don't have a photo like this. >> no, i don't. [ laughter ] i have a question. >> jimmy: yeah. >> where is his other hand? [ laughter ] the back. you've got to look on the back. congratulations again. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i love the speech. was it emotional for you? was it what you thought it was going to be? >> it was kind of emotional because the man that raised me, sergeant phillip harrison passed away four years ago, and when i was young he always told me that if i listened to him he was going to prepare me to make it to the hall of fame. so it was emotional because he wasn't there. but everybody else was there. my mom was there. kids were there.
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>> it was a great moment. >> jimmy: yeah, that was big. you had a great -- you got a a big laugh by thanking kobe bryant. >> yes, i did. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, that's probably good. you go "last but not least the great kobe bryant, a guy that would push me to help me win three titles in a row. he would also help me get pushed off the team and traded to miami." [ laughter ] that is why we love you. you know that. >> thank you, yeah. he's a great player. you know, we just had a -- we just had work drama. it was nothing -- you know, we had -- off the court, great relationship. love him. love his family. love his beautiful daughters. but work drama. you know, you've got two stubborn guys trying to accomplish the same thing. and we won three out of four titles. >> jimmy: absolutely. [ applause ] >> i mean, i think the story would be better if we didn't win any titles.
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and downs, we won three out of four, and like i said he helped me get pushed off the team and traded to miami. >> jimmy: could be a good thing. i also love you now on "inside the nba." >> yes. >> jimmy: you're great. and man, you're just good on camera. >> thank you, appreciate it. >> jimmy: we love you, obviously. but you're good. you know how to work the room. you know how to do it. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you do a bit called shaqtin' a fool. >> yes. >> jimmy: where, you show a a clip of someone falling or something that makes you laugh. >> right. >> jimmy: it's one of my favorite parts of the -- because i wanted to get rid of the term bloopers. so bloopers, delete that from your system. it's now shaqtin' a fool. you say anything funny, anybody messed up don't say bloopers no more, say shaqtin' a fool. got it? >> jimmy: okay. i'll do that. because, that's interesting you brought that up because we talked to tnt and then they sent over some shaqtin' a fool clips. >> okay. >> jimmy: of you. >> me? [ laughter ] oh, no way. me? no way.
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shaquille o'neal. watch this. >> get him, kenny. oh! >> wow. >> are you at a sock in your shorts man? are you serious? >> come on, man. come on. [ laughter ] ?? ?? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i mean, come on. that's how much fun. [ applause ] now, look, you're known for your power game, but tonight i'd like to challenge you to a a sport that's based on flexibility and agility. it's called "jell-o shot twister." you up for it? >> we're going to play four games of it right and you'll beat me three times? >> jimmy: that's right. >> i'm guaranteeing a win today. guaranteeing it. guaranteeig it. >> jimmy: i'm feeling lucky. shaq and i are playing a fun game after the break. stick around, buddy. [ applause ]
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rescription medicine for depression. trintellix may start to untangle or help improve the multiple symptoms of depression. for me, trintellix made a difference. tell your healthcare professional right away if your depression worsens, or you have unusual changes in mood, behavior or thoughts of suicide. antidepressants can increase these in children, teens, and young adults. trintellix has not been studied in children. do not take with maois. tell your healthcare professional about your medications, including migraine, psychiatric and depression medications increased risk of bleeding or bruising may occur especially if taken with nsaid pain relievers, aspirin, or blood thinners. manic episodes or vision problems may occur in some people. may cause low sodium levels. the most common side effects are nausea, constipation and vomiting. trintellix did not have significant impact on weight. ask your healthcare professional if trintellix could make a difference for you. hey listen, when you tell our friends about your job,
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e is doing a lot of cool things digitally to help machines communicate, might want to at least mention that. i'm building world-changing machines. with my two hands. does that threaten you? no! don't be silly. i'm just, uh, going to go to chop some wood. with that? yeah we don't have an ax. or a fireplace. good to be prepared. could you cut the bread? ?? ?? ?? ?? ma'am? ma'am? the line starts over here, ma'am. own your everyday runway. now that's the good stuff. kohl's.
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?? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. welcome back. i'm hanging out with the 2016 basketball hall of fame inductee, shaquille o'neal, the one and only. [ cheers and applause ] shaq, i wanted to challenge you to a game. have you ever played twister? >> yep. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, tonight we're going to play jell-o shot twister. it's the same rules as twister, but there's a jell-o shot on every color. so when you put your hand or foot down on a circle, you have to take that shot. we should have used your vodka. >> maybe next time. >> jimmy: what is the name of it? >> before we get started, can i get some stretch music? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: roots, have you got any stretch music here? ?? all right. [ cheers and applause ]
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now, here's the deal. first one to fall down loses. and you can't bump me out on this one, all right? i have a feeling i'm going to lose this one. let's do this. higgins. >> seth: yep? >> jimmy: all right. will you give us a spin? >> steve: got it. ready? >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] >> do a spin for me. [ laughter ] >> steve: hofa, come on. >> jimmy: let him spin. all right. green. green. >> steve: green. left foot green. >> jimmy: left foot green. >> steve: left foot green. it's a shot. >> is it your turn on my turn? same time. look how big your left foot is. [ laughter ] >> steve: i loved that movie. >> it's not a movie. >> jimmy: are you ready? >> i haven't had jell-o in about 20 years. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: pretty good, right? >> steve: right foot red. [ light laughter ]
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>> steve: it's a big spin. you've got to get all of it. you ready? >> jimmy: i feel like alex trebek. >> steve: right foot green. >> jimmy: what's that? >> steve: right foot green. there we go. [ laughter ] can't use his hand. >> steve: shaq. >> jimmy: i might get a jell-o habit. >> jell-o shot. not a jell-o snack. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's starting to kick in. you're my best friend. >> steve: right hand red. right hand red. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you can't put your weight on me. that's not fair! i can't do it. i can't do it. i'm a weak man.
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[ cheers and applause ] ?? that's my man right there. shaquille o'neal. hall of famer. big hofa. eric church performs after the break. stick around, everybody. the one and only! [ cheers and applause ]
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?? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest is a a seven-time grammy-nominated country artist who will launch his "holdin' my own" tour in >> yeah, you're good. >> jimmy: performing "kill a a word" off his album, "mr. misunderstood," -- so far? >> you're good. >> jimmy: thank you. with a little help from rhiannon giddens. >> you're good. >> jimmy: please welcome eric church! [ cheers and applause ]
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? if i could kill a word and watch it die i'd poison never shoot goodbye ? ? and beat regret when i felt i had the nerve yeah i'd pound fear into a pile of sand ? ? choke lonely out with my bare hands i'd hang hate so that it can't be heard ? ? if i could only i'd take brokenness out back ? ? and break heartbreak stand there and laugh right in its face while shootin it the bird ? ? i'd put upset down in its place i'd squeeze the life out of disgrace ? ? lay over under six cold feet of dirt
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kill a word ? ? give me sticks and give me stones bend my body break my bones ? ? use staff and rod to turn me black and blue 'cause you cant unhear you can't unsay ? ? but if were up to me to change i'd turn lies and hate to love and truth ? ? if i could only kill a word i'd knock out temptation's teeth ? ? i'd sever evil let it bleed then light up wicked stand and watch it burn ? ? i'd take vice and i'd take vile tie 'em up there with hostile ?
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leave 'em for the birds if i could only kill a word ? ? so give me sticks give me stones bend my body break my bones ? ? use staff and rod to turn me black and blue you can't unhear you can't unsay ? ? but if were up to me to change i'd turn lies and hate ? if i could only kill a word if i could only kill a word ? ??
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>> jimmy: fantastic. thank you, thank you, thank you. thank you, buddy. eric church! [ cheers and applause ] rhiannon giddens. "mr. misunderstood" is available now. my thanks to renee zellweger, shaquille o'neal, eric church, rhiannon giddens and the roots from philadelphia, right there! [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. i hope to see you tomorrow. ??
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[ cheers and applause ] ?? >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- victoria beckham. from "empire," actor jussie smollett. author colson whitehead. featuring the 8g band with matt garstka. ?? [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. >> seth: good evening, everybody. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] great. fantastic. you have fantastic, fantastic energy for a monday. in that case, let's get to the news. hillary clinton upset republicans this weekend after


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