tv The Late Show With Stephen Colbert CBS August 3, 2016 11:35pm-12:38am EDT
stephen! stephen! stephen! >> stephen: thank you, ladies and gentlemen. thank you so much. it's a packed house. super energetic crowd tonight. super packed house. people are very excited about the election, right? me too, me too. how are you doing jon, feeling good. >> jon: feeling good. we're doing it. >> stephen: i love that jacket. you look like barney from the waist up. up. >> jon: i used to watch barney when i was a kid. you know, i used to check him out. ♪ i love you you love me ♪ >> stephen: i do not know what you are talking about. one of us is slightly older than the other, and i would like to not dwell on it if you don't mind. well, i've got to start tonight with some shocking news. there's a huge scandal out there that does not involve donald trump.
i know. i know. i had the same reaction. instead, it involves future former president barack obama. remember a few months ago when he got iran to release four american prisoners? well, it turns out, he forgot to tell us about a small shipping and handling fee. because as the prisoners were freed, turns out $400 million was flown to iran on a plane loaded with cash. don't you hate it when you're on an airplane and you get stuck sitting next to $400 million? you don't know who gets the armrest. it's incredible. and now, a lot of people are saying it sounds like ransom, because they know what the word "ransom" means. ( laughter ) but the administration is denying any connection between the money and the prisoner release, claiming that the timing is coincidental. "oh, i'd love to go pick up my
prisoners, but my plane is already full of cash. hey!" why don't we do the the... ( laughter ) so it's great the prisoners came home, but this does not look good for the obama administration. and i am going to keep talking about this story, or my name's not stephen colbert, and my swiss bank account's number isn't 160 plus 257. ( cheers and applause ) okay. okay. what else is in the news? have you heard of this donald trump guy? very interesting guy. people talk about him a lot. today on coffee joe morning, and the funky bunch, coffee joe revealed this: >> several months ago, a foreign
policy expert on the international level went to advise donald trump, and three times he asked about the use of nuclear weapons. three times he asked, at one point, "if we have them, why can't we use them?" >> stephen: ooh, i know that one! ( applause ) ching-ching. aarrgghh! time passes. yes, i followed his orders and dropped the bomb. "okay, right up there, the thing with the rope and the noose? okay, i'll go." ( laughter ) story had a sad ending.
( laughter ) and i can really picture donald trump at that national security meeting: "i know there are probably reasons not to use nuclear weapons. i can't think of one, but i'm open to hearing them. meatloaf, your thoughts?" arsenio hall, should i bomb gary busey? now, this caps off a week in which trump attacked a gold star family, seemed happy about getting a purple heart as a gift because it "was much easier than earning one," and appeared to feud with a crying baby at a campaign rally. and i've been out here for five minutes, so i'm going to say five-gallon can of van kamp's pork and beans. he makes more gaffes than i can keep up with. it's like "i love lucy" in the chocolate factory, except that
with trump, the brown stuff ain't chocolate. ( cheers and applause ) thank you. thank you. ( cheers ) thank you. thank you. peabody, please. now, things have gotten so bad that trump's allies are plotting an intervention. an intervention. "they love you, donald. and the first step to recovery is admitting that you're the problem." i'm guessing-- and this is just wishful thinking-- but senior g.o.p. officials are exploring options if trump drops out. in fact, top republicans have been seen standing outside mitt romney's house holding boom boxes. ( laughter ) ( applause ) but if romney won't run, paul
ryan might have a replacement. because on monday, paul ryan re-tweeted a poll that said, harambe the gorilla is polling nationally at 5%, adding the comment, "one in 20 want to see harambe in the oval office." ( laughter ) ( applause ) it's a bold choice. only obstacle i can foresee is that he's a gorilla, and he's dead. on the plus side, i'm pretty sure that's harambe's real hair. now please say hi to jon batiste and stay human, everybody. ♪ ♪ ( cheers and applause ) ♪ do-do-da-da
now just over there a second ago i was saying that desperate republicans are looking to replace donald trump at the top of the ticket. but realistically, who could they turn to? whoever they pick would have to be hawkish on national defense, friendly to wall street, and is despised by liberals. yeah, okay. yeah, okay. ( applause ) admittedly-. ( cheers and applause ) she fits the bill, but she's spoken for. speaking of which, trump's got a new nickname for this woman. >> why did hillary get rid of her middle name? huh? hillary? no, but why did she get rid of it, hillary "rotten" clinton. "rotten" clinton. hillary "rotten" clinton. maybe that's why. it's too close. >> stephen: ha-ha-ha. how does he do it?
( laughter ) ( applause ) by which i mean, sleep at nigh ( applause ) ( cheers ) ♪ ♪ hillary rotten clinton. and several top republicans, like congressman richard hanna and g.o.p. fundraiser meg whitman have just announced they're going to vote for hillary clinton. so it's clear the g.o.p. establishment is not pleased donald trump, but on the other hand, he can't stand them either. for instance, senator mccain has promised that he will support the republican nominee, despite trump saying this: >> he's not a war hero. he was a war hero because he was captured. i like people that weren't captured. ( booing ). >> stephen: i know, but it really brings you back to a simpler time... when that statement was shocking. ( applause )
despite that, mccain endorsed trump. but despite that, yesterday, trump said this: >> i've never been there with john mccain because i've always felt that he should have done a much better job for the vets. he has not done a good job for the vets." >> stephen: oh, my lord, that is below the belt. which isn't hard, because at 79, mccain's belt suparound his armpits. i'm going to get you. come here, come here, mister! come here! now-- his belt is up around where a prom dress sits. now, paul ryan was slower to endorse donald trump than most. back in may, he said" >> i'm just not ready to do that at this point. i'm not there right now. >> stephen: yes, he wasn't there he was in his happy place, fantasizing about president harambe. ( laughter )
but, eventually, ryan did throw his support behind trump and then threw up a little in his mouth. but, yesterday trump rewarded that endorsement with a ringing nut punch saying, "i like paul, but i'm just not quite there yet. i'm not quite there yet." ouch! oh! working the boys like a speed bag down there. using paul ryan's own words against him. that's a great way to take down your political opponent, which for trump, is now everyone. here for some in-depth analysis on trump's childish laughing out at his own party, please welcome trump campaign senior junior strategist, timmy jenkins. ( cheers and applause ) timmy. timmy. as always, timmy, thank you for joining us. >> your pleasure, stephen cold-sore. >> stephen: ok, going to let
one pass. now, you are the mastermind behind donald trump's campaign strategy, correct? >> that's right. during the primaries, i was the brains behind those powerful nicknames: "lyin' ted," "little marco," "booby jindal." >> stephen: "booby jindal?" i never heard that one. >> yeah, he dropped out before we could use it. biggest regret of the campaign. but i'm excited now for latest invention: switching from "crooked hillary" to hillary "rotten" clinton. >> stephen: that was you? >> yeah. it works on so many levels. >> stephen: it actually only works on one level, timmy. calling your opponents names is one thing, but throwing paul ryan's own words back in his face? doesn't a presidential candidate have to be more mature than that? >> doesn't a presidential candidate have to be more mature than that? ( laughter ) >> stephen: timmy, please. i'm trying to have a serious conversation. >> i'm trying to have a serious conversation. >> stephen: stop it! >> stop it! >> stephen: i mean it! >> i mean it!
>> stephen: i'm a big dork! >> now, why would you say that ( laughter ) have some self-respect, stephen cold-balls. >> stephen: timmy, seriously. okay, the last four or five days have been the roughest i can recall for any presidential candidate. trump is down in the polls, party leaders are discussing replacements, reports are that morale within the campaign is plummeting. doesn't any of that make you question whether your bullying strategy is working? >> doesn't your face make you question whether your butt is working, stephen cold-balls? >> stephen: you already used that one. >> okay, listen, i know. we node to talk for a second, man-to-fartknocker? >> stephen: go ahead, sure. >> i'm in over my head, man. i thought this would be fun, you know, share some laughs, destroy the g.o.p., maybe ban an
entire religion from the country. but trump's out of control. >> stephen: wait, timmy, what are you saying? >> that guy is too childish to be president. i'm voting for hillary! cooties be damned! ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: timmy jenkins, everybody. wow! >> i'm with her, butt-lickers! >> stephen: we'll be right back with john cena. stick around. our biggest event of the year just got better! ♪ i'm free to do what i want and have a good time. ♪ announcing zero for seventy-two across the entire lineup of ford cars, trucks and suvs. so hurry in for 0% financing for 72 months. that's freedom from interest... and freedom to choose with ford. america's best selling brand. ♪ i'm free, baby! now get 0% financing for 72 months across the entire lineup
of ford cars, trucks and suvs, during the ford freedom sales event. ♪ never underestimate the power of energizer. our longest lasting energizer max ever. and you're talking to your doctor about your medication... this is humira. this is humira helping to relieve my pain and protect my joints from further damage. this is humira helping me go further. humira works for many adults. it targets and helps to block a specific source of inflammation that contributes to ra symptoms. doctors have been prescribing humira for over 13 years.
humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. before treatment, get tested for tb. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores. don't start humira if you have an infection. ready for a new chapter? talk to your rheumatologist. this is humira at work. i'm not a customer, but i'm calling about that credit scorecard. (to dog)give it. sure! it's free for everyone. oh! well that's nice! and checking your score won't hurt your credit. oh! (to dog)i'm so proud of you.
now he's getting ready for w.w.e.'s summerslam. please welcome, john cena! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ ♪ >> all right! yes, indeed! ( cheers ) big crowd. excited crowd. >> stephen: very excited to see you. was that your music they played when you came out here? >> that was. >> stephen: that's your entrance music? >> you're hired. you guys did it better than-- >> jon: we're already-- >> they're already working? that's cool. >> stephen: maybe on the weekends. i love that suit, man. >> oh, thank you. >> stephen: that's, like-- >> there is a reason behind this. >> stephen: what is the
reason? >> well, this is the color of our brand new w.w.e. program on the u.s.a. network, "smack down live." >> stephen: it's blue, that is the color, that blue? >> it is this blue but it serves a guy my age 39 years old, every once in a while can still blue himself. ( laughter ) ( applause ) >> stephen: i have not-- i have not done enough yoga, unfortunately. that's a nice suit but i'll tell you what else i like. you have a really nice suit on here. this is "teen choice awards." this is you as hillary clinton at the "teen choice awards" right there. that's a really good-- that's a really good look. yeah, yeah. she should think about it, yeah. i should stop thinking about it. ( laughter ) now, obviously, you probably don't talk about politics a lot, but i have to ask you one question-- donald trump seems like a larger help than-life
figger. do you think he would do well in the world of wrestling? >> stephen, do i! donald trump is a w.w.e. hall of famer. >> stephen: what? >> w.w.e. is made for a guy like donald trump. donald trump has been to wrestlemania and shaved my boss' head. >> stephen: really. >> so, guys, this is all my fault. >> stephen: wait a second. is there any chance this entire campaign is scrimented and you know how it ends? ( cheers and applause ) >> no. >> stephen: no? >> no. >> stephen: okay, summerslam 2016, what can we expect? >> you can expect everything. for those people who don't worry w.w.e.-- and there are only one or two of you out there, i thank the rest of you. the rest of you are in for a hell of a show. if you don't know, it's the best live production you can possibly imagine. we take the drama and excitement of sports, the grandeur of a
rock concert, and we kind of roll it into this one big ball and send it out to the w.w.e. universe live at w.w.e. network. at summerslam it's basically our season finale. if you watch "game of thrones" you always watch the whole thing to gear up for the finale. >> stephen: you got any dragons? do you go buck naked or anything like that? >> so i tried both of those. ( laughter ) the dragons and being naked at the same time... >> stephen: bad combination? >> man, that was not-- that was a poor management decision, my friend. >> stephen: who are you fighting? >> a guy named a.j. styles. >> stephen: a.j. styles you'll take him with one hand tied behind your back. >> please don't say that. >> stephen: no, you're going to take him-- is he good? i've never heard of him. ( applause ) is he good? >> he's very good. >> stephen: he's very good. >> he's very good. >> stephen: have you fought him before? >> i have. >> stephen: and-- >>-- i-- finished second.
>> stephen: oh, wow, oh, wow. could i ask you about your-- about your-- some of your signature moves? >> yeah, sure. >> stephen: i love the attitude adjustment. >> yes. >> stephen: and what is this? what is this called that do you? >> that's called the "you can't see me," can which sets up a maneuver called the "five-knuckle shuffle." man, my life is weird. ( laughter ) >> stephen: whose idea was this. you do this right before the attitude adjustment, right? >> yes, that was a dare from my little brother and he dared me i wouldn't get it on television. >> stephen: because it's so dumb? ( laughter ) because that's what little brothers-- not me! that's what little brothers force their older brothering to do. >> i was really excited to be here tonight. >> stephen: still be. still be excited. >> quite frankly, you're being very hurtful right now. >> stephen: i apologize, i apologize. >> that's cool. i can't see you, so it's good. he gets it.
dumb my eye. >> stephen: we actually have a clip of you doing it. jimmy, show the people the good stuff. >> that right there is the attitude adjustment. and wait for it. wait for it. i'm about to become invisible. hold on. there's a big build-up because there's a magic potient. and i'm invisible right there. i disappear. i disappeared. >> stephen: okay, i take it back. ( cheers and applause ) i take it all back. >> it actually works, but only in a w.w. wring. i actually become invisible for a few seconds. >> stephen: wow, amazing. a couple of quick questions? >> what do you bench? >> enough to let me beat a.j. styles live at summerslam on the w.w.e. network. >> stephen: all right, that's more than i can. i'll tell you that much. do you have like-- i've heard, like, the rock has a crazy amount of food he has to ingest on a daily basis to stay all jacked.
like, what do you do? is it all just live chickens? >> if it breathes or it's green you eat it. >> stephen: if it breathing or it's green you eat it. >> stephen: if it breathe breatd it's green it's gone bad. >> yes, if it breathe and it's green it's gone bad. >> stephen: did you have any big wrestling heroes when you were younger? as a kid i loved macho man. i loved the hulkster? >> i can say who my heroes were as a kid. you brought up dwayne johnson. i think he's a hero and inspiration to myself and anybody in the w.w.e. ( applause ) thank you, a couple of rock fans here tonight. he certainly has blazed the trail for all of us. he always comes back and continues to perform year after year in the w.w.e. and has really set the precedent that we're all not just w.w. superstars. we're a little bit more. we can sit in a chair and banter back and forth with the
ultrawitty stephen colbert. >> stephen: did he start you acting? is he the reason you started acting? >> have you seen any of my stuff? ( laughter ) this has all been kind of a soft open to my start in acting. i'm going to start a few years down the road. it's not exactly acting what i'm doing right now. i'm trying my best. i'm swimming with the floaties on. >> stephen: we have to take a commercial break will you stick around? >> yes. >> stephen: we'll be back with more john cena. we're going to act. ♪ ♪ ( applause ) gilman: go get it, marcus. go get it. ...coach gilman used his cash rewards credit card from bank of america to earn 1% cash back everywhere, every time. at places like the batting cages. ♪ [ crowd cheers ] 2% back at grocery stores and now at wholesale clubs. and 3% back on gas. which helped him give his players something extra. the cash rewards credit card from bank of america.
more cash back for the things you buy most. twokay, i got roped intocard frspending the dayca. with my sister's kids (makes farting noise) and they like keep talking about back to school shopping? back to school is like our red carpet. just go to old navy. they have like the coolest back to school clothes up to 60% off. it's what we all wear. and they have jeans starting at like 10 bucks. noice! don't say "noice." sounds stank! no... stop. okay. um. guess what! we're going to old navy. who's excited? who wants to go shopping? that's why bud light has aes new look... and we want to share it with everyone... jackpot! still the same refreshing bud light. with a new look. poallergies?reather. stuffy nose? can't sleep? take that. a breathe right nasal strip instantly opens your nose up to 38% more than allergy medicine alone.
shut your mouth and say goodnight, mouthbreathers. breathe right. the new cmade with 100%ts white meat chicken, no artificial preservatives, flavors and colors, it just might convince the judges here today. (crowd cheers) and they've done it! the new chicken mcnuggets rightfully claim their gold! this is the best day-
>> stephen: this is a question that some of my producers have asked me to ask you this-- >> this isn't you asking me. >> stephen: this is not me. this is being asked through me by some of my producers. and let's just say she would like to know of all the muscles on your body, are all of them as big as... ( laughter ). >> what the -- >> are purported in certain movies they've seen? >> my goodness, man. >> stephen: again, it's not me. >> if you vacation south of the equator it's going to be a short trip. ( laughter ) >> stephen: really? really? >> i'm not doing any no-handed push-ups any time soon. ( laughter ) ( applause ) i'm so glad that in the w.w.e. we wrestle without our shirt and not without our pants. >> stephen: that is-- that is-- >> are we cool? >> stephen: yeah, we're absolutely cool. now, this is how i would answer that. ask me. >> so, stephen, i've been watching you in movies and, you know, someone asked me to ask--
this isn't from me-- but someone-- let's just say she-- asked me your muscles are so enormous, are-- are all your muscles big? >> stephen: oh, i've got a huge ( bleep ). ( cheers and applause ). >> and that's why you're behind the desk and i'm in the chair! >> stephen: no one's going to fact check you. okay, okay. now, let's get back to wrestling here for a second. you can explain something to me-- >> man, this is awesome. >> stephen: only cbs. ( laughter ) now, explain-- explain to me-- you can explain this to me because i've watched wrestling since evidence a kid. you don't not only have to be in shape but you have to understand the physics of certain moves. how do you the the pile driver. >> you take a guy's funny bits and put them in your face and you use throanch-- what? what's up, man?
>> well, well, well, if it isn't stephen colbert, "the late show" dummy. >> stephen: i'm sorry about this. >> uh, who is this? >> stephen: this is-- this is butch the studio bully. i'm sorry about this. butch, i'm in the middle of an interview here, so maybe... >> >> how are you going to ask your stupid questions without your stupid cards? dummy. i'll be waiting for you! ( laughter ) >> stephen: john, what am i going to do? he's been making my life a living hell. you know a lot about hitting people. >> damn right i do.
do you think you can get me in fighting shape? >> sure, we'll start with a few weeks of cardio, get your heart rate up, then focus on strength and resistance, adjust your diet-- >> stephen: all i have time for is a training montage. >> good enough! take my hand! ♪ ♪ ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: stephen, you gotta want it! it's got to be an eight-inch dollop. it's not going to frost itself. don't go soft on me! get back in there! ♪ ♪
( cheers and applause ) ♪ ♪ >> stephen: wow. ( cheers and applause ) wow, thanks, man, thanks man. i feel totally ripped and jacked. >> busting out of that suit, man. >> stephen: thanks, man, i'm really feeling it. >> if that bully ever comes back he's going to get his. hey, man, i didn't even see you there. >> you know, i couldn't wait so i'm just gog pound you now. >> stephen: well, butch, i'm ready for you. >> oh yeah? >> stephen: yeah.
get him, john! >> damn right, i'm going to kill your whole face. >> stephen: w.w.e. summerslam takes place on sunday, august 21 live on w.w.e. network. john cena! we'll be right back with scott eastwood. there'sany day now!ful baby. [crunch] you're eating doritos? really? (laughter) owww! give me that! (screaming) [baby crying] [crunch] what if i told you there was a car companyawards. that received all of these awards? one company won an award in all of these? chevy. ahhhh! chevy chevrolet is the most awarded car company
over the last two years. i love it! i'm just going to stay in here, is that okay? this summer find your tag and get 16% of msrp cash back on select remaining 2016 vehicles in stock. that's over $4,100 cash back on this all new 2016 chevy malibu. find new roads at your local chevy dealer. t-mobile never stops improving. and we doubled our lte coverage. that's right! our coverage stacks up with anybody, including verizon and at&t. and only t-mobile gives you more than just great coverage. now you can stream video and music --free! without touching any of your data. so ditch the other guys. and get great coverage and more with t-mobile. we got you covered. and we won't stop! try duo fusion!ing antacids? new, two in one heartburn relief. the antacid goes to work in seconds... and the acid reducer lasts up to 12 hours in one chewable tablet. try new duo fusion.
from the makers of zantac. man, i'm glaaflac!c pays cash. isn't major medical enough? no! who's gonna' help cover the holes in their plans? aflac! like rising co-pays and deductibles... aflac! or help pay the mortgage? or child care? aflaaac! and everyday expenses? aflac! learn about one day pay at aflac.com/boat blurlbrlblrlbr!!! [ male announcer ] cats will do anything for the irresistible taste of temptations treats. what are you doing? oh, here, check this out. ♪ [ meows ] temptations. cats can't resist.
( band playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: welcome back, everybody. you know my next guest from such films as "gran torino," "fury," "the longest ride" and from your dreams. you can now see him in "suicide squad." please welcome scott eastwood. ♪ ♪ ( applause ) >> stephen: i think-- i'll have to check with the judges,
but i think that might be the fastest a guest has ever come out here. yeah. that's a new land speed record for our stage. >> that's what she said. ( laughter ) ( rim shot ). >> stephen: thank you very much. nice to meet you. let me just go a little over the c.v.. you're an actor. you model. you surf. lots of shirtless pictures of you on the internet. you have an adorable dog named freddie. you publicly admitted to crying during "the notebook." you fly a helicopter. are you auditioning to be the next bachelor? that's the kind of thing people make up on the resume. >> busted. "the bachelor," that's every man's dream to be on a show with 20 women competing over you? >> stephen: sure. >> that would be great. >> stephen: i, a big old greased up meat slab.
>> meat slab! no, look at this! >> stephen: this is a fantastic picture. this is you and your dad on the cover of the new "esquire." it's just hitting the stands now. >> thank you. thanks. ( applause ) >> stephen: did you live with your dad as a teenager? >> i did until i pissed him off, yeah. >> stephen: yeah? >> yeah. >> stephen: what's it like to piss this man off, because he-- he just has a look that would, like, sterilize a frog at 50 paces. ( laughter ) what was it like to get in trouble with this fella? >> it's kind of like when you see him in "gran torino" say, "get off my lawn," but with his hands around your throat. ( laughter ). >> stephen: but only because he loves you, right? >> oh, love. >> stephen: can you give me the stare? you can scare the hell-- oh, boy. ( cheers and applause ) that's it. the little head move, too. the little head move. the little head move says, "did you notice i was looking at
you?" well, now you're in "suicide squad." working with david error, who you worked on, on "fury." brutal movie to work on, i imagine. >> not like actually going to war. >> stephen: but he runs boot camps. physical and psychological torture. >> i think he likes to torture his actors. i'm not sure why i came around for a second round of torture. >> stephen: did you have to go through extensive training for "suicide squad"? >> we did. he likes to put his actors through, like you said, and-- i was playing a spec -ops guy in the movie. and at one point he had us-- sleep deprivation for 72 hours. >> stephen: what! >> yeah. and then he had us sneaking around houses in the greater toronto area, and looking back at it now, we could have gotten arrested. >> stephen: i think that's
illegal. >> i'm pretty sure it is. >> stephen: was this just to make you seem tired? why do you keep somebody up for 72 hours? just give the man a toddler. you'll be tired faster than that. >> that's also good. >> stephen: did it bond you guys? did it make you feel like a team because you were all suffering at the same time? >> yeah, a lot of suffering together. >> stephen: we had margot robbie on the show and she said she has her own tattoo gun and that she was tattooing the word "squad" s-k-w-a-d, on people. did she approach you about getting the squad tattoo? >> you know-- no. >> stephen: no? >> no, will and i stayed away from that. i saw wills giving the tattoos out. i said run away from that trailer. >> stephen: no tattoo for you? >> no. >> stephen: do you have any tattoos? >> no, my dad was sort of old school. and i remember my sister canning
home one time with a tattoo and him saying, "well, why the hell did you do that?" i said, i'm not getting a tattoo. okay. >> stephen: so this is older sister? >> older and younger, actually. now what i think about it, yeah. >> stephen: did you learn to be good by watching your brothers and sisters ( bleep ) up? ( laughter ) because i think-- >> you're allowed to say that on air? >> stephen: no, i'm not allowed to say that. what i did was i just ( bleep ) up. ( cheers and applause ) thank you. thank you for being here for my last show. ( laughter ) i guess what i'm asking is i think younger brothers, younger brothers and srs learn to get around parents by watching how the older brothers and sisters get in trouble. >> that's true. i was very sneaky. i was very sneaky, so i got away with a lot. >> stephen: are there things that your folks don't know you
did, even now, like "i don't know how to tell them that?" >> no. no. no. not at all. >> stephen: now, you're in the few "fast and furious" coming out, "furious 8." >> i am, i am. ( applause ). >> stephen: are you a car guy? have you always loved cars? >> yeah, classic cars. i've always been a fan of classic cars. >> stephen: what was your first car? >> that's an interesting story. i actually asked my dad, i remember, when i was in college, for a loan. i think it was for seven or eight grand for a truck. i had a job at the time. and he said no. and so then i had-- i remember getting a deal on a '91 ford crown vic, which was for people who don't know, is an old police car. >> stephen: sure, sure, not that sexy. >> not that sexy, no. the trunk didn't close. so i used a bungee cord. that was-- that was nice.
you know, for dates. >> stephen: was this your first car? >> first car. >> stephen: i had a 1978 powder blue pinto. >> oh, nice, that's good. >> stephen: i got all the girls who walked by yours. scott, thanks so much for being here. it was a pleasure to meet you. good luck with the new movie. >> stephen: "suicide squad" is in theaters this friday. scott eastwood, everybody! we'll be right back with a performance by the great aaron neville. stick around. ♪ ♪ ( applause ) at our retirement plan today. not now! i'm cleaning the oven! yeah, i'm cleaning the gutters! washing the dog! washing the cat! well i'm learning snapchamp!
chat. chat! changing the oil... (vo) it's surprising what people would rather do than deal with retirement. pressure-washing the... roses. aerating the lawn! (vo) but with nationwide it's no big deal. okay, your retirement plan is all set. nationwide? awesome. nice neighborhood. ♪ nationwide is on your side we were learning about how talenteding] the ancient greeks were, and suddenly i traveled back in time! i thought, "i could have been a writer." or an athlete! i could have even been an architect! then i realized, i don't have to go back in time to do amazing things. i can start today. yes i can. choose your favorite pasta,or piadina or sandwich. it all comes with our never-ending soup or salad. and all the breadsticks you want. starting at just $6.99
get never-ending value for lunch, today at olive garden. time is the most valuable thing there is. [cuckoo cuckoo] people try to beat time... [scream] ...but time always wins. our greatest fear is running out of time. there's a bomb in the salsa can! we gotta get out of here! my phone's still charging! so if time is the most valuable thing there is, why would you waste more than you have to charging your phone? why would you waste more than you have to charging your phone? [explosion] [explosion] ahhhhhhhh! the galaxy s7 edge, with fast wireless charging and our longest lasting battery.
( band playing ) ( cheers and applause ) e. that's why i use e*trade mobile. it's on all my mobile devices, so it suits my mobile lifestyle. and it keeps my investments fully mobile... even when i'm on the move. sign up at etrade.com and get up to six hundred dollars. it's stunningly beautiful, a perfect blend of performance and design. the world's thinnest laptop, the new premium hp spectre. sir you need to turn that off now. the new hp spectre with intel core i7 processor.
hp. keep reinventing. (music - "time after time" ♪ by iron & wine.) ♪ we all want what's best for our kids. introducing mcdonald's new chicken mcnuggets. made with 100% white meat chicken and no artificial colors, flavors and now no artificial preservatives. ♪ ♪ never underestimate the power of energizer. our longest lasting energizer max ever. that's why bud light has aes new look... and we want to share it with everyone...
jackpot! still the same refreshing bud light. with a new look. and spent eleven months in a pow vcamp.m what donald trump said about our members of the military being captured is a disgrace. he's a war hero because he was captured. i like people that weren't captured. when you fly
over enemy territory, the odds might be against you being able to come home. donald trump doesn't understand the weight of sending americans into harm's way.
he's unfit to be president. priorities usa action is responsible for
the content of this advertising. >> stephen: here performing "be your man," from his new album, "apache," please welcome grammy winner aaron neville! ( cheers and applause ) ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> ♪ i put her hand to my heart and said don't you feel ♪ how it's beating don't be afraid ♪ don't be afraid
she held a child in her arms ♪ she was the one who was weeping ♪ baby blue eyes the color of the sky ♪ so if you're lonely, and you need me ♪ i'll be your man i will be ♪ if ever trouble comes around you ♪ i'll be your man ♪ i will be ♪ if you got something to go through ♪ need someone to hold you just take my hand ♪ just take my hand i'll be your man ♪ i'll be your man ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
♪ she held that cross to her skin ♪ and said jesus, you hear how i'm pleading ♪ a rose colored lens to cover up my sins ♪ she held her feelings within and suddenly screamed out in ♪ pain where have you been ♪ i been here all along ♪ so if you're lonely, and you need me ♪ i'll be your man ♪ if ever trouble comes around you ♪ i'll be your man i will be ♪ if you got something to go through ♪ need someone to hold you just take my hand ♪ just take my hand i'll be your man
♪ i'll be your man i will be, i will be ♪ i'm the burning ember in your heart ♪ if you lose your way i'll be your fire in the dark ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ so if you're lonely, and you need me ♪ i'll be your man i will be ♪ if ever trouble comes around you ♪ i'll be your man i will be ♪ if you got something to go through ♪ need someone to hold you just take my hand
codogs just won't quit.! neither does frontline. introducing new frontline gold. with its new easy applicator frontline gold delivers powerful protection that doesn't quit for a full 30 days. its new triple action formula is relentless at killing fleas and ticks. frontline gold. the latest innovation from the maker of frontline plus. for persistent protection you can trust... good boy! go for the gold. new frontline gold. available at your vet.
>> stephen: that's it for "the late show." tune in tomorrow when my guests will be jamie dornan; the new star of "hamilton," javier munoz; and malcolm gladwell. now stick around for james corden and his guests, denis leary and salma hayek pinault. good night! captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> reggie: ♪ are you ready to have some fun ♪ feel the love tonight don't you worry 'bout ♪ your hang-ups and fears 'bout to set you right ♪ it's the late, late show [ cheering and applause ] ♪[ music ] ladies and gentlemen, all the way from