tv The Late Show With Stephen Colbert CBS October 31, 2017 11:35pm-12:38am EDT
captioning sponsored by cbs >> stephen: good evening. shortly before we began taping tonight's show, we learned about the horrific events here in new york city. it appears a terrorist has attacked innocent citizens in lower manhattan. and all of our hearts, all of our broken hearts go out to oarch affects and to all of those who live and work in this great city. tomorrow and the next day, new yorkers will wake up to new and keep going. one thing is for sure, the new yorkers will never live in fear. jim. >> it's "the late show with stephen colbert."
tonight, stephen welcomes mark ruffalo. chris matthews. gilbert gottfried. and thundercat, sitting in with jon batiste and stay human. and now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, it's stephen colbert! ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: hey! how are you? hey, chris! what's going on? that's right, that's right. what's going on, you all. please, have a seat, you're too kind. welcome to "the late show." i'm your host, stephen colbert. ladies and gentlemen, happy halloween. ( cheers and applause ) everybody's in the spirit. the white house eve decorated.
pretty spooky. even spookier was this picture melania tweeted of her view from the inside. ( laughter ) they actually make it look that way all year long so she doesn't try to escape. ( laughter ) this year, i decided to dress up, my costume. i'm a late-night talk show host. we're like vampires: we only come out after dark, and we're extremely pale. of course, it's a scary time for donald trump. i believe it was michael jackson who said ♪ no one's gonna save you from the beast about to strike 'cause this is mueller mueller night ♪ ( cheers and applause ) now, ghouls and goblins, join me for tonight's twisted tale of terror, "the fall of the house of trumper."
our story so far: yesterday, special prosecutor robert mueller indicted trump campaign chairman and maitre d' at a gangster-themed pizzeria, paul manafort, on 12 charges, including "conspiracy against the united states," which i believe is a legal term meaning "getting trump elected." ( laughter ) now, manafortee indictment-- if i'm not mistaken, manafort's indictment was expected and trump's thumbs were standing guard on castle tweet-more: "the fake news is working overtime. as paul manafort's lawyer said, there was 'no collusion' and events mentioned took place long before he dot, dot, dot. dot, dot, dot, dot, came to the campaign." ( laughter ) ironclad defense. ironclad defense. "don't blame me. i happen to know he was a criminal before i hired him."
( cheers and applause ) now, notice-- very interesting, very interesting notice. you notice his no-collusion witness is manafort's lawyer? "o.j. did not do it. johnnie cochran swore to me on a stack of bloody gloves. honestly, i think hillary is the real killer. okay, they saw this one coming, manafort, but what nobody saw coming was that mueller got a guilty plea from trump campaign foreign policy adviser and limo driver that won't stop asking you if "you party," george papadopoulos. and here's the thing: papadopoulos was secretly arrested by mueller months ago, and since then, has turned state's evidence, working for mueller as a "proactive cooperator." yes, "proactive cooperator." that sounds like a fancy name
for a cheap date. but what does it mean, jeffrey toobin? >> what this says to me is that papadopoulos, between july and october, was wearing a wire. >> stephen: ooh, papadopo-licious. ( laughter ) needless to say, the white house folks were caught with their pants... crapped. ( laughter ) as one senior republican put it, "the walls are closing in," and "everyone is freaking out." oh, are they? do they wake up every morning feeling overwhelming dread that something terrible is happening in our country that they have no control over? i have no idea how that feels... if i drink enough. ( cheers and applause ) welcome to the club!
but this morning, donald trump rummaged through the "take a lie, leave a lie" tray and came up with this: "few people knew the young, low level volunteer named george, who has already proven to be a liar. check the dems!" we did check with the dems. they feel pretty good about this. but nice of you to ask. ( laughter ) and you're right, he did lie-- to the f.b.i., to protect you, which is why he was arrested. ( laughter ) now, according to trump, george is just some random young person he's barely heard of, like tiffany. ( laughter ) >> jon: ooo"h"! >> stephen: really? really? >> jon: oooh! ( laughter ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: well, if that's true, sir, then how come you said this when you were asked who your foreign policy advisors
were: >> stephen: "excellent guy. horrible conspirator. but as a person, just the tops." mr. president, if you still can't remember him, here he is with you at a meeting so pale, that greek is the diversity hire. ( laughter ) , of course, yesterday-- yesterday? is this yesterday? white house spokesperson and angry woman behind you at target, sarah huckabee sanders, tried to explain that picture away. >> this individual was the member of a volunteer advisory counsel that met one time over the course of a year. he was a volunteer on, again, a counsel that met once, that met one time. i'm telling you that he was a volunteer member of an advisory counsel that literally met one time.
>> stephen: and i'm telling you, that literally doesn't matter. did you not go to health class? collusion is like pregnancy: it only takes the one time, girl. protect yourself. ( cheers and applause ) it's true! you gotta double bag. double bag your career. so nobody knew this low-level campaign worker except trump, who made him a foreign policy advisor. it makes sense-- he named his garden gnome attorney general ( laughter ) except-- except-- answer my riddles three. that's not party gnome. i'm not sure what that reference is, but i liked it. except they did know him because papadopoulos was emailing about russia with top trump staff, including paul manafort, former campaign manager corey lewandowski, and trump national campaign co-chairman and colonel sanders getting "high on his own supply," sam clovis. ( laughter )
now, when papadopoulos wrote to ask clovis about going to russia to collude, clovis replied. "i would encourage you... to make the trip, if it is feasible." well, that's nice. betray your country, but only if it's no bother-- you know, like, "on your way home, could you pick up some bread, some eggs, and half a gallon of treason?" now, this email from clovis sounds damning, but clovis' lawyer explains that his client is a "polite gentleman from iowa" who "would always have been courteous to a person offering to help the campaign." "why, shucks, you've gone to all this trouble. it would be rude not to engage in an international conspiracy to undermine our democracy." go on. so things are looking bad for the white house, and they can't wriggle their way out of this one. it's as if-- it's as if all of their lies have suddenly come back to entangle the white house in some sticky mesh of interwoven threads.
what's the metaphor i'm looking for? yeah, yeah, that's right, that's right. yeah. ( cheers and applause ) i gotta say-- >> jon: i like that. >> stephen: this could be-- for trump, it could be the spookiest halloween ever, because i'm pretty sure mueller is ready to drop off a few more flaming bags of poop. we have a great show for you tonight! mark ruffalo is here. hulk! but when we return, a special salute to general john kelly. stick around. how do they make starburst taste so juicy? they use wicked small fighter jets to shoot the juiciness into every starburst. [ pilot ] it's about to get juicy. whoo! i feel so aliii... it takes guts. [ female announcer ] starburst. unexplainably juicy. ...just go to bed."
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we've got a lot more-- we've knot a lot more show tonight, but jon would you please introduce to the people out there and the people at home the talented young man with the band tonight. >> jon: we have thundercat with the band! >> hey, steve. >> stephen: always good to see you. your critically acclaimed album, "drunk," came out earlier this year. thank you so much for being here. >> thank you for having me, seriously. wonderful, wonderful. this demonstrates about how deep i'd like to be in a glass of bourbon right now. speaking of things that are on television, like our show right now, last night, white house chief of staff and doctor who sees something he doesn't like on your x-ray, john kelly, was over on the fox news and offered his opinion about all the confederate stat use being taken down.
>> i think we make a mistake, though, as a society, and certainly as individuals, when we take what is today accepted as right and wrong and go back 100, 200, 300 years or more. it's inconceivable to me that you would take what we think now and apply it back then. >> stephen: nope, sorry, lot of people thought slavery was wrong back then, for example-- i'm going to go out a limb here-- black people. in 1850, the united states had 3.2 million slaves. i think their yelp review would have been pretty bad: but kelly's historical scholarship didn't stop there. he also had an interesting take on the root causes of the civil war. >> the lack of an ability to compromise led to the civil war. >> stephen: and, of course, we all remember john wilkes booth's famous cry as he shot lincoln, "can't we at least talk about
this?" what do you mean "there was a lack of compromise"? the civil war happened because of compromise-- the missouri compromise, the three-fifths compromise. you're a general, and you don't know why the civil war happened? what do you think caused world war ii, a zoning issue? ( laughter ) "i vant to build a strip mall in the sudetenlands." maybe some mixed use housing in poland. what's so wrong with that?" maybe, maybe i'm being unfai ( laughter ) and maybe a lack of compromise really was at the heart of the civil war. i mean, take this letter from confederate soldier buford nathaniel jessup to his wife. "my dearest elizabeth, i regret to say that the tide has turned against us here at antietam. the union army steadfastly refuses compromise. we keep saying, 'maybe we can just have slaves, like, monday wednesday, friday?'
and they're all like, 'naw.' and it's like, 'okay, what about every other weekend?' but they won't give us any slaves. they're being total nazis abou ( laughter ) this, which is weird because nazis aren't even a thing yet. well, i've just been bayoneted by my brother, got to go. or maybe-- true story-- kelly knows better and is just being willfully ignorant, because as the chief of staff, he's now forced to defend the positions of an idiot. but we can not judge john kelly by today's standards. he said it yesterday. ( laughter ) we'll be right back with mark ruffalo. ♪ show you the way
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( band playing ) ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: hey, ladies and gentlemen. welcome back to the show. folks, youu know my next guest from "foxcatcher" and "spotlight." he's now returning as the incredible hulk in "thor: ragnarok." >> where have you been? everybody thought you were dead! so much has happened since i last saw you. i lost my hammer, like, yesterday, so that's still pretty fresh. loki, loki is alive. you can believe it? he's up there. loki, look who it is! ( laughter ) >> stephen: please give a big hulk smash to mark ruffalo.
♪ ♪ ( applause ) >> that's beautiful! >> stephen: nice to see you again. >> wow! wow, what a crowd. >> stephen: very few of my guests allow me to pet their face. you're very-- you're very loving and giving. >> we go way back. >> stephen: we really do, 2015-- you came on the old show, to. >> 2008. fracking. >> stephen: we talked about fracking back then. >> we banned it. >> stephen: did we ban it? >> we banned it in new york state, scotland, ireland. we're doing an international tour. is this yours? can i have some of this? >> stephen: welcome back. the last time you were on this show talking to me november of 2015! >> it was a long time ago. >> stephen: good lord. >> too long. >> stephen: it's a different world. it really is. it really is. >> a lot's happened since then. >> stephen: it sure has. >> i used to be able to sleep back then. ( laughter ) remember sleep? >> stephen: oh, yeah... which
doth knit the raveled sleeve of care. >> oooh. >> stephen: yeah-- you don't, like, dress up or anything for halloween, do you? >> i do. >> stephen: you do? >> i do you. >> stephen: spend all your time in outfits. it must take hours to get in that green hulk makeup. >> no, there's no makeup at all. >> stephen: never? >> no i have to wear a silly little suit. >> stephen: is that what this is? yes, that's what this is. there you are. there you are. >> a trained actor reduced to a chinese checkerboard. ( laughter ). >> stephen: in that scene, like, the grunting. >> that's mine. >> stephen: but do you -- >> i do all my own grunting, steve! ( laughter ). >> stephen: but do you actually do the grunting? they don't lay the grunting in there. >> i do my grunting. i do my yelling, i do my roaring, that's me. >> stephen: when you do, "hulk no like," that's you. >> hulk like fire, thor like water! ( cheers and applause )
>> stephen: totally buy it. totally buy it. ♪ ♪ >> yeah! >> stephen: so the the new movie is "thor: ragnarok. the last time you were here you were here for "spotlight." so "thor: ragnarok and "spotlight," where is the cross-over there for you? how are the political and social messages any way the same for you? i know you're a serious oorkt and i want to know how you took that "spotlight" experience, and the performance of hulk with some of that really heartbreaking, soul-searching, really scathing indictment of america's social, political, and religious power structure? ( laughter ) ( laughter ) is it different? is it different movie? >> it's slightly different. >> stephen: yeah. i saw them both. i liked them both very much. >> but in the end, by the way -- >> stephen: in the end? >> i can't tell. it's a spoiler alert.
sorry. i get in trouble a lot. >> stephen: oh, wait, you got in big trouble. >> i get in a lot of trouble. >> stephen: tell the people what you did that must have driven marvel or disney crazy. you gave away the whole movie, didn't you? >> well, only the first 10 minutes of it. >> stephen: how did you do this again? >> well, in my defense -- >> stephen: someone attacking you? >> they asked me to do an instagram live post. >> stephen: who did? >> marvel! disney! >> stephen: yeah. >> and so-- and so i said i would do that, but i had never done instagram live so i didn't really know how it worked. >> stephen: because are you a... >> grandpa! >> stephen: yes. >> it was a grandpa move. i went to bed a leading man, and somehow i woke up a grandpa, okay. but i-- so i went backstage, and i was-- i was doing the instagram live, and it was fun and games and everyone loved it. and i was doing the audience. and then they said, "return to your seat.
we're going to start movie. of the so i pushed the button, what you think is going to stop it, but there's another button to stop it. >> stephen: what did the first button do? >> the first button just tells you to push the second button to stop it. >> stephen: why not make the first button to stop it. >> that's what i said! >> stephen: so? >> so i ended up shoving it in my pocket and sitting down and watching the movie. well, it was live. ( laughter ) >> stephen: so it was broadcasting... >> it's broadcasting to the movie basically free to millions and millions of hopefully paying viewers. ( laughter ) and -- >> stephen: how did you find out-- >> and my phone was blowing up. people were texting me. and i must got 50 texts in 10 minutes. >> stephen: saying, "stop this, you idiot." >> of course, that's what they were saying but i didn't want to be rude and take out my phone and look at the text s. >> stephen: you're not supposed to that. >> you can't do that in a movie!
you're an a-hole if you do that. >> stephen: do you have it with you? do you have your phone with you? >> no good deed-- yeah, buddy. no good deed goes unpunished. i'm sitting there enjoying the movie with my family, and a woman came up and she poked me on the shoulder and i turned and i said, "yeah, what, what in? and she said, "your phone is on! you're instagramming live this whole show! you've been instagramming live for 10 minutes! turn it off!" ( laughter ) oh, no. oh,-- oh, no! "turn it off!" " "yeah, yeah, turn takeoff." 50 texts. people i haven't seen since high school are texting me, "turn off your phone! marvel's going to fire you! we love you." >> stephen: they didn't fire you, did they? >> well, not yet. i'm in the middle of a movie. they're not going to fire you before you're finished. >> stephen: what's the one you're doing right now. >> "infinite war two" or
"avengers 3-- i mean "avengers 4." >> stephen: so it's the eighth in a series. >> we're doing "avengers 3 and four," or "infinite war 1 and two." i know it's a little confusing. >> stephen: when will they make up their mind? >> once they test screen tprobably. >> stephen: have you done "infinite war 1 in? and "avengers 3?" >> yes. >> stephen: and when do we get to see that? >> when it comes out, steve. >> stephen: but i really enjoyed the "thor: ragnarok. >> you did? >> stephen: oh, i loved it. >> did you? you saw it. >> stephen: i saw it on a little screen lying in bed. >> that's all right. this was hilarious. >> stephen: i got to see it-- because i'm special eye got to see at home on a little link they send you. and it's really enjoyable. it's really great. >> how good was it on a scale of 1-10. >> >> stephen: 1-10 like-- >> 1 being not so good and 10
being really, really amazing. >> stephen: it would be 10. >> why, steve-- ( applause ) i'd go t see that movie based on that recommendation. >> stephen: i don't think it's going to need my recommendation to see this movie. >> people seem to like it. >> stephen: it's got slow seens scooens in it when you don't see. >> it's got two guys browing down, hulk and thor apologizing to each other after a terrible argument. >> stephen: the thor-- the thor. thor and hulk-- and hulk talks a lot in this. >> he does. >> stephen: did you insist, "i'm going to do this movie but you have to give me words to say." >> i'm so sick of grunting. i want to say something for (bleep). >> stephen: you're hulk for most of the movie. >> yeah! what's he like to be a roommate with? how does he eat? how does he do stuff? i'm sick of yelling and screaming and smashing all the time, man! it gets old! >> stephen: hulk's got feelings in this one. he has regrets. >> he does.
he does. i think he's the emotional -- >> stephen: thor of the movie without a doubt. it shouldn't be called "thor." it should called hulk. >> how about "thulk." >> stephen: thulk, or >> stephen: "thor: ragnarok" is in theaters friday. mark ruffalo, everybody. we'll be right back with chris matthews. what if i sacrificed... and what if i swore i'd succeed... so you could wake up one day with the choice to be anything you wanted. well then, my great granddaughter... it would all be worth it.
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guest tonight has been a washington bureau chief, a presidential speechwriter, and a political commentator for over 20 years. you know him as the host of "hardball," please welcome chris matthews! ♪ ♪ ( applause ) >> stephen: thanks for coming back. >> ha! ( laughter ) i'm back! >> stephen: last time we spoke-- >> yes, sir. >> stephen: was right around the inaugural, january of 2017. >> yeah. >> stephen: and we were speculating about the next nine to 10 months, and herery with again. and i said to you when you left, "come back when we have something on the books." what do you see, as somebody who covers politics and been in politics, what do we have on the books now? >> i think this halloween, america's coming as donald trump, which is pretty scary. ( laughter ). >> stephen: he represents the united states now. >> he has become the symbol of our country to the world, and
it's pretty frightening. and i think the world is-- that always sort of resented us and is jealous of us, now feels a little sorry for us. i really think that times have changed. and, by the way, don't you get the sense, although he's a little neater than colombo, that this guy mueller is like columbow, "just of just one more question. just one more question." >> stephen: as trump shuts the white house door on him. >> and he walks around with that 300-pound attache case with him, no hair out of place. i think the guy is going to slowly build his case against the trump enterprise, the entire trump enterprise, starting with the guy who opened up the relations with russia, following up that his son-in-law did it. it's going to be a slow, inevitable process of developing the closure between the trump people and the russians. and i'll tell you, i've never seen-- i've been in politics for 50 years, different sides of the fight, journalism and politics-- i've never met a russian.
i never had anything to do with russians. there's nothing wrong with russians as individuals but this is the strangest administration. every time a name comes up-- carter page, the cato kalin of the case-- he doesn't coanything, he's just there. and manafort, who has all the russian connections, and roger stone with all the russian connections. and michael stone is over there having dinner with vladimir. what is the vugz erussian connection? why is it always-- it's like yeahy mason talking about the o.j. case-- what is this, walking through the blood, in the blood, around the block blood? why are there always russianed involved? i do not understand the affinity this guy seems to have. it may go in history as the russians had nothing left at the end of the cold war. all they had left was a security sthe k.g.b.-- which they renamed-- and a lot of gas, a lot of oil and gas they wanted to suls. so they hired a lot of lobbyists, like manafort, a lot of money pours in the door, trying to influence our elections so we end the sanctions, start buying fosul
fuels, stop talking about climate change and they'll be back in business as gas stations. >> stephen: you have a new book "bobby kennedy: a raging spirit." and before we go into it, can you explain this striking image on the back? >> yeah. i want everybody to see this. this is why i wrote the book. you know, look at this poor family along the railroad tracks in 1968 paying tribute to boab kennedy as his body goes by. >> stephen: on a train. >> that kind of-- after he had been assassinated. that kind of patriotic commitment and trust in political leaders is gone. look on the other side. these young african american kids. you know, inside the book i showed lines of african americans, they were singing "battle hymn of the republic" spontaneously when boab's body went by, spontaneously they just started singing. these white people who have lost their faith in the democratic party now.
they think they've been abandoned, discarded, trump people, reagan-- or whatever. they had this patriotic connection to this kennedy guy. you know why? because he believed in uniting people. unlike today with trump who does everything in the world to distract with us stupid stuff over stat use or bathrooms, he's always come up with something to get to us hate each other. or saying that his predecessor snuck in the country from africa. he never stops at a chance to device guideus. that's what trump wants to do. and bobby to his credit. >> -- he had flaws-- but all he tried to do was bring us together. he was a uniter, had empathy for people-- trump has no empathy. how you can talk to a war widow and not express empathy. body went the night king was killed-- and i have the tape to prove it-- he said to a guy in a flat trump and said, "do the people know king has been killed today?" and they said, "no, they don't know." he had to walk out in a tough crowd in a rough neighborhood, the cops wouldn't go with him,
and bobby told them what happened and said we have to learn to live together and my brother was killed by a white guy. and i don't think we have that today. we don't have-- we don't have empathy. we don't have unity. we don't have compassion. we don't have leaders that we trust like this guy. >> stephen: the epigraph of this book is a quote from churchill that says, "man is spirit." >> yeah. >> stephen: what was bobby's spirit? >> you know, i think it was, as a kid, he was the runt in the family. and i worked very hard to figure out, why was this rich sid kidso caring about people in trouble-- minorities, all kind of people-- american indians. he cared about the white appalachian people, the poor whites in the country. he was the small kid in the family. i think a lot of life is birth order and where you fit in the family. he was 5'8", his brothers were six feet tall, and he called the kid to his face, "you're a runt." and when kid showed interest in other people and generosity, he'd say, "i don't
know where he got that from." finally bobby became the tough guy. and eventually the real spirit of the guy came out. he looked after white people. >> stephen: it can come out after j.f.k. was killed? >> a friend of the family told me, on background, he decide he would spend his life going after bad guys, like mobsters -- jimmy hoffa, really scary characters he'd spend his life going after them as a prosecutor. and he decide people like that end up being their own-- creating their own hell on earth. they create their own hell, the bad guys of this planet. so why don't you focus on the victims? and he changed his life that way. >> stephen: there was a terrorist attack in downtown manhattan tonight, this afternoon. >> yeah. >> stephen: what do you think boabobbykennedy's response woule been to what we're facing now? >> i think, like most of us who try to understand terrorism, it's a desperate act by our enemy to get to us hate them more. they want to stir up more hatred
on both sides. the idea of terrorism is to make the state that they attack more of a police state, more controlling, less free, more buildings locked up, more passes to get through doors, close up the-- today you can't even go to the capitol. you used to be able to go to the u.s. capitol, just walk in the door. to try to close up society so people begin to feel like less than democratic people. and i think the terrorists win that way. so what you have to do is recognize it's a terrorist act. it's an act of hatred. but its real purpose is to turn the society they attack into a police state. >> stephen: well, thank you for this book. ( applause ) i keep this on my desk. thank you for this book about boab kennedy. he, to me, is the heartbreak g kennedy, this picture, one of the earliest memories will of my life. was watching that train. and... i remember my sister
putting her arms around me and pointing me to the tv and explaining what was happening. who this man was. and i keep this on my desk. would you read to the people what boab kennedy said. >> it's from the south africa speech. each time a man stands up for an idea or acts to improve the lot of others or strikes out against injustice he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope and crossing each frrg a million different centers of energy and daring those ripples build a current that can wipe-- can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance. robert kennedy. ( applause ) >> stephen: "bobby kennedy: a raging spirit" is on sale now. chris matthews, everybody! we'll be right back with gilbert gottfried.
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chris christie and kim guadagno's failures shortchanged our future. after 8 years- incomes are down, costs are up and our economy is crawling. we are better than this. i'm phil murphy together we'll build a stronger, fairer economy that works for every new jersey family. christie and guadagno left new jersey stuck. i'm serious about moving new jersey forward. ♪ ♪
he's a husband, father, veteran... but most of all, he's a fighter. chris brown has never been afraid to take on the big fights. that's why he stood up to republicans and democrats alike to fight the north jersey casinos and the takeover of atlantic city. chris brown is fighting to protect jobs in our region... a true champion for the working men and women of atlantic county. on november 7th, let's keep him fighting for us. chris brown for state senate, he's on our side. ( band playing ) ( band playing ) ( cheers and applause )
doing this show under protest because my two kidsmented to go trick-or-treating. and i said to them, "no, i'm doing stephen colbert." and they said, "we don't want to go to stephen colbert. we want to go trick-or-treating." >> stephen: are they here right now? >> yes. >> stephen: do they want to meet mark ruffalo? he's the hulk. >> yes. >> stephen: he's backstage. >> they want to meet him more than they want to know me. >> stephen: thank you for being here. halloween is a big night. how old are your kids? >> eight and 10. >> stephen: perfect halloween tonight. they'll never get tonight back. ( laughter ) halloween, would you go out dressed up as a comic book character? >> i had a really cheap pirate outfit that i'd wear as a kid, and i would go out in the-- and i'd go trick-or-treating, go home, dump out the candy, and then i had a zoro mask, so i hit all the same houses again.
yeah ( laughter ). >> stephen: with the zoro mask on? >> yeah. >> stephen: why doesn't every child do that? that's genius! >> i was basically even as a kid a snora. this, i'm teaching yiddish now. >> stephen: look it up. now, you are still doing stand-up, right? >> yes. >> stephen: how-- how are you liking the road? are you having fun on the show still? >> yeah, i feel like willy loehmann out on the road. >> stephen: that's a sad story. >> i'm teaching now, culture. >> stephen: that story does not end happily? >> no, that ends with-- i don't want to to ruin the ending for you. if you are planning on running out and seeing "death of a salesman" i just don't want to ruin it, the big surprise. ( laughter ) but i will say at the end of macbeth, it doesn't end well. ( laughter ) >> stephen: so-- so-- are you
having fun? like, it's-- you travel all over the united states still? >> yeah. i travel, and before i forget, i have a documentary. >> stephen: oh, okay. >> and it's called "gilbert." >> stephen: okay, is-- >> i won't tell you what it's about. yeah. ( laughter ) filmmaker neil berkeley made a of a documentary-- he came to me and he said, "i've also dreamt of making a gill do you meanary. and i said well you should set your dreams higher than that. and we made it. >> stephen: why-- why did you want to do a documentary? >> i wanted to do a documentary because i had been dead for 20 years. that's-- ( laughter ) that's usually why the subject of a documentary is. >> stephen: but you didn't mind having, like, a crew come into your house and your life? >> i hated it. i hated it from the first second. >> stephen: you have a wife and children. how did they like it?
>> no, they hated it, too. ( laughter ). >> stephen: so who liked it? >> no one. no, but it's gotten great reviews so far. >> stephen: okay. >> people said you'll laugh and you'll cry. which is what women have said after they've had sex with me. ( laughter ) yeah. >> stephen: that's the yelp review. that's the yelp review. now, did-- we have a clip here from the documentary. you can set up what's happening here? do you know what's going on in this? >> it's something to do with my life. ( laugh ). >> stephen: i think it's your wife and children. >> yes, yeah. my wife and kids are in this. and-- yeah. that's about it. ( laughter ) >> stephen: jim? >> i still feel very uncomfortable going, you know, my wife." still feels weird. "my kids." still feels odd to say it. >> nice to meet you. i'm the mother. >> okay, so, this picture is a
family picture from this year. max, daraa, gilbert, and me. >> say nice-- say, "nice to meet you." >> nice to meet you. >> there's a scene in the documentary where we go to a hotel and it's in chicago, and they're having a war reenactment. >> stephen: a war reenactment? >> yeah, it's like every different war, they're having, like, people dressed as soldiers-- >> stephen: oh, they're cosplaying, like, the war? >> yes, civil war, korea, vietnam, world war i. so i immediately ran to the world war ii one, and all these nazi officers ran over to me excited going, "oh, problem child."
and they're there with the swastikas and the iron cross, going, "oh, can we take a selfie?" and i remember thinking, "you know, i've had these nazis wrong all this time." ( laughter ) i-- i-- they're really a swell bunch of guys. >> stephen: there was violence on both sides. there was violence on both sides, gilbert. ( applause ) >> stephen: the documentary, "gilbert," opens this friday. gilbert gottfried, everybody! we'll be right back. don't go away! ♪ ♪
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>> stephen: that's it for the "late show," everybody. tune in tomorrow when my guests will be nicole kidman and jonathan groff. now, stick around for james corden and his guests, allison janney, laurence fishburne, and nancy pelosi. good night! captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org ♪ are you ready y'all to have some fun ♪ feel the love tonight don't you worry 'bout ♪ where it is you come from it'll be all right ♪ it's the late, late show >> announcer: all the way from some spooky, dark,l