tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC April 12, 2016 11:35pm-12:31am EDT
>> jimmy: i'm jimmy. i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thanks for coming. [ cheers and applause ] it's very kind. i'm glad you could join us on this beautiful night in southern california. this is night two of marvel week here. last night the cast of "captain america: civil war" was with us. tonight benedict cumberbatch will present the world premiere for the new movie dr. strange. and from "agents of shield" agent coulson clark gregg is with us. then tomorrow night we have team iron man and chris hemsworth, who plays thor, will be here on thursday. it will be thors-day on thursday. it's quite a week. [ laughter ] it's like a marvel-themed bar mitzvah. and i'm finally becoming a man. [ laughter ] we're not only focused on marvel tonight. we do have to provide equal time.
superman"? [ cheers and applause ] well, warner brothers just released the trailer for the sequel today, much earlier than anticipated, and it looks great. [ laughter ] you know, let's review that one more time because the special effects are incredible. they really are. he has a lighter and -- you really need to see it in imax to get the full thing. [ applause ] that video is why the internet exists. while we're on the subject of lighting up, here in california as i'm sure you know we grow a lot of marijuana. it comes right out of the ground. and it's very lucrative. it's especially lucrative here in the l.a. area because we add avocado to it. it's a dollar more. [ laughter ] anyway, there is a very good chance that voters will legalize marijuana for recreational use in no
[ cheers and applause ] right now -- you can get it back pain.you can only use it fake migraines. fake insomnia. i know there are people who get medical marijuana for real reasons. i just haven't met any of them. [ laughter ] one guy i know got a prescription from a -- this is true. the reason the doctor wrote on the form, musician. [ laughter ] his condition was musician. [ applause ] anyway, with the new law probably coming, a lot of companies are trying to get in on the ground floor. property values in areas where they grow pot have reportedly tripled. they're saying it's like the gold rush, only since it's marijuana there probably won't be much rushing. it will be like a gold stroll. but it's coming. i have to say, it's weird to think about pot being legal because just personally it seems like only yesterday i was bailing our warm-up guy don out of the west hollywood jail. [ cheers and applause ] remember
when i got you out of for allegedly growing a pot plant on his balcony. don, what is your medical condition? what did you tell them? >> sprained wrist. >> jimmy: oh, sprained wrist. 11 years his wrist has been sprained. [ applause ] from rolling? [ laughter ] sprained wrist? really? oh, boy. the doctor must have been high too, i guess. [ laughter ] you know, we're always on the lookout for strange little moments that pop up during the local news, and we happened upon something very unusual this afternoon courtesy of our abc affiliate in miami. normally you see people jumping up and down yelling baa bah baoey behind reporters but rarely do you see something like this on tonight's edition of "behind the news." >> well, jeanine, right behind me here at the historic tower
theater, a forum has been going on since early this kinds coming together. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: they're off to use the early bird special. cute couple. last night on "dancing with the stars" donald trump's ex-wife marla maples was on the show. she's not anymore. she was eliminated. not just from competition. she has been eliminated. she's gone. [ laughter ] so that's one trul p omp out of running. [ applause ] and marla said she -- by the way, rule of thumb. when you divorce a billionaire, make sure to tell your lawyer, i need enough money so i'll never have to be on a reality dancing competition show. but donald trump -- marla maples losing aside, donald trump is still very much focused on winning. >> we're going to start winning again. we're going to win so much, we're going to win at every level. we're going to win economically.
economy. we're going to win with military. we're goinge' so much you may even get tired of winning! and you'll say too much winnin. we can't take it anymore. mr. president, it's too much. and i'll say no, it isn't. we have to keep winning. we have to win more! we're going to win more! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: why even have a microphone? you think he ever walks off stage and goes "what the hell was i talking about?" [ laughter ] that is the most fantastic imaginary conversation i think i've ever heard. trump -- that was in albany. while he was speaking a fight broke out in the crowd. somebody got video of these two guys went at it. it's unclear whether the fight broke out at the rally or if the fight started first and turned into a trump rally. but you know, when you see the footage from these
when a monster truck gets elected president of the united states. [ laughter ] at this point i'd be more surprised if a fight didn't ee ak out at a trump rally. sir mix-a-lot and he didn't play "baby got back." [ laughter ] a lot has been made about people hitting each other at these trump rallies, and the truth is it probably happens at every football game that ever gets played. but we thought it would be fun to play a game tonight, to put your first impression powers to the test. the test is this. can you tell whether a person is the fighting type just by looking at them? we went out in the street today and asked people, have you ever punched someone in the face? okay? so we're going to see an individual, introduce him or herself, and then based on that very brief introduction we're going to try to guess if that person has ever punched someone in the face. you got it? okay. let's begin. here we go. >> i'm nicky black. i'm from new jersey. >> have you ever punched someone in the face? >> jimmy: has nicky black from new jersey ever punched someone in the face?
a lot of yeses. all right. let's find out. n no. [ applause ] >> jimmy: not even the person who colored that ve next? >> my name's kim. i'm from pennsylvania. >> have you ever punched someone in the face? [ audience responds ] >> jimmy: we have one no and everyone else says yes. has kim from pennsylvania punched someone in the face? >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> who? >> a friend, you know. sometimes random strangers, whatever. they get drunk and confront me. >> jimmy: what lunatics are getting drunk and confronting him? let's see another one. >> marlene kaplan and i'm from mount laurel, new jersey. >> have you ever punched someone in the face? >> jimmy: what about marlene? has she ever punched -- yeah? everyone says yes. all right. >> have i ever punched somebody in the face? yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> who? >> well, actually, it was a friend, and she did something that i just didn't agree
and i just wentcannon. you know, bingo can be a very violent game. [ laughter ] wholesale do we have out there? >> my name is adele and i'm from scotland. >> have you ever punched someone in the face? >> jimmy: has adele from scotland punched someone in the face? well, let's see. >> i have not. and i don't intend to. >> jimmy: that's why she had to move out of scotland. [ applause ] i like that you're applauding. who's next? >> jacob. mobile, alabama. >> have you ever punched someone in the face? >> jimmy: hold on a second. i don't even care if he -- look at that -- i want to see more of that lady in the background. [ laughter ] go back a little bit. >> yes. >> jimmy: oh, there she is. that was captain america's grandma we got just -- >> have you ever punched someone in the face? >> yes. i don't know his name. >> what did he do? >> he was not being nice at my bachelor
>> jimmy: you have to be nice at bachelor parties. all right. next up. >> i'm beck.in the face? >> jimmy: how do we feel about beck? face puncher? and the verdict is>> boyfriend. he didn't do anything wrong. i was just pissed at him. >> jimmy: you know, that's love. love means never having a reason for punching someone in the face. who's up next? >> my name is ricardo and i'm from berlin. >> have you ever punched someone in the face? >> jimmy: we've got a lot going on here, first of all. has ricard from berlin ever punched someone in the face? >> no.no. would you consider punching yourself in the face? >> not really, to be honest. >> jimmy: it's a healthy response. you think he regularly dresses like that or he's just excited about guns and roses at coachella? [ laughter ] and i believe we have one more. >> my
i'm from -- i'm fe -- has sid kaplan, the world war ii vet from new jersey, ever punched someone in the face? >> oh, many times. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that was educational, right? we have to take a break. when we come back from the break, benedict cumberbatch with a never-before-seen trailer for "dr. strange." so stick around. hey there, can i help you with anything? hey siri, what's at&t's latest offer? oh, i don't think that siri can... right now, switch to at&t for an iphone and get one free.
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[ cheers and applause ] the world premiere trailer for the new marvel movie "doctor strange." it stars cumberbatch. and i guess he's kind of a magician, dr. strange. he does magic. magic power. what is he, guillermo? >> i think he's a magician. >> jimmy: you think he's a magician. me too. >> oh, how little you know. >> jimmy: what was that? >> dr. steven strange. wielder of the eye of dago movement oto. he who walks the plain between life and death itself and occasionally does bar mitzvahs and children's parties. >> like i said, a magician. you do do children's parties you said? do you do that kind of stuff? because my daughter would really love -- >> i was
i'm sorry. it's the dry english humor. i don't do gic trick. you want to see dr. strange-love do a trick? rangelove. strange.se ] just strange. no love. well, there is love, but not in the name. it's just dr. steven strange. look, they're not tricks. they are -- they're ancient mystical incantations to defend this world against other dimensional threats. you can't just do those at a children's party. >> jimmy: oh. well, what do you do? can you like make balloon animals? like maybe you can twist up a giraffe or something? for us? yeah? [ balloon sounds ] oh. [ applause ] that's good. >> jimmy: oh. well, all right. don't do that at the party. okay? all right. thank you. that's
"doctor strange." tonight on the show we have music from deftones. katie couric is here. and we'll "agents of shield's" clark gregg. >> announcer: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" are brought to you by heinz barbecue sauce. buy great new regional flavors made with the masters. yeah look. [phone ringing] kenny, i'm 'bout to put you in the fish tank. whaaaaat? that's crazy. [electrical cracking] your phone can't do that max. here, i have another one. (all three) whaaaaaat?! the new water-resistant galaxy s7 edge.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tonight, she's the global news anchor for yahoo!. and she has a new documentary on epix called "under the gun." katie couric is here with us tonight. then, a band from sacramento, california. this is their new album. it's called "gore." deftones from the samsung outdoor stage. tomorrow night, from "captain america: civil war," team iron man will be with us -- don cheadle, emily vancamp, paul bettany and robert downey jr. and we'll have music from mayer hawthorne. and on thursday, chris hemsworth, who is thor, very thor, by the way, will be here. from "broad city" abbi jacobson and ilana glazer, with music from anderson paak featuring schoolboy q. our first guest tonight started out as an
and was so good at it they gave him his own tv show.ou you can watch it tuesdays at 9:00 here on abc. please welcome clark gregg. how are you doing? thanks for being here. you're like the meat in the middle of the captain america avengers sandwich this week. you know that? >> that sounds really good. i don't want to say too good. a little bit good. >> jimmy: as a member of the marvel family and really kind of a central figure, were you excited to see the "doctor strange" trailer? had you seen any of it before? >> i had not. i don't think anyone on the planet has seen it until you just showed that. >> jimmy: you were not privy to -- that is true. you were not privy to that? they don't run this
you? >> now i feel kind of bad. no. no. but i also -- i had the same guy's got a fantastic name. >> jimmy: benedict cumberbatch. it's the best name ever. >> clark gregg seems monosyllabic and lame in comparison. >> jimmy: it is. >> i want to change it to cla clarkledick greggleditch. >> jimmy: clarkledick. we may have to bleep that. what was the last name? >> greggleditch. >> jimmy: it looks good on paper. >> you took down the strategic homeland enforcement intervention and logistics division in an impressive way. >> jimmy: that's me and greggleditch, we do that together. >> i feel like thats going to follow me for a while. >> jimmy: i hope it does. >> you're not supposed to give
can't shake. >> jimmy: that's the genius of you. agent coulson, your chtime? avengers? >> no, the first one was "iron man." >> jimmy: in "iron man." of course. and then a couple movies later you were killed. your character was killed by loki. >> i got a call. i met joss whedon at comic-con. and he said listen, i've been wanting to introduce myself. i'm making "the avengers," and i want agent coulson to have a big part. and at first i thought i was being pranked or i was dying soon and this is the make-a-wish foundation thing. [ laughter ] i was like oh, okay, that would be cool. and then i got another call from marvel a little bit later and they said, joss wasn't kidding, you have a great part in "at vejeve the avengers." i said that's amazing. they said yeah, what happened to you is what brings the avengers together. i thought this got less cool. but then it turned out i was is on the dead and three season's later marvel's "agents of shield." >>
this kind of thing a lot but what i'm wondering is your u alive in the tv marvel world and dead still in the movie or are you alive in the whole marvel universe? >> that's a really good question. we should ask dr. strange, who i feel like would have the answer. i'm told it's all connected. >> jimmy: okay. >> i certainly have some splaning to do. >> jimmy: you have been told you're alive. >> i've been told i'm alive. and maybe i appear in "captain america: civil war" which i'm going to see a little bit later this evening. but i haven't shot anything yet. so i feel like it's getting a little close to the wire. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, since the premiere is tonight it seems unlikely. >> cgi. i don't know. >> jimmy: yeah. i saw it, and i don't -- it doesn't look good. >> i wasn't in it? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you were not in it. unless you were in some sort of a costume we didn't recognize. >> i was a storm trooper -- wrong universe. [ laughter ] i was a wookiee. >> jimmy: you came back to life
was that the case? >> yeah, i don't think there was any intentec a call -- and the world, the fans i gue repres avatar, kind of normal and not scary to anyone. and they started posting hashtag coulson lives. and i say posting, like writing it on bridges in vienna and all around the world. and it became this thing. >> jimmy: and when you say they were posting, you mean you were writing it on bridges -- [ laughter ] -- in vienna and all around the world. >> yes. i have more frequent flyer miles than anybody but i've got a show and i'm back alive. >> jimmy: that's pretty great. by the way, speaking of twitter, you posted a -- what year was this photograph taken? >> oh.
well, judging by the hair, i'm going to have to say that's the punk new wave ska drumming tradition. >> jimmy: i assume you were part of a band and n dmm times square. no, i was in a band. i was in a band really with the clever name that i came up with, the squares. >> jimmy: oh, really? the squares. >> it was like a new wave thing. and we did kind of a lot of covers. >> jimmy: oh, you did. >> yeah. we did an upbeat that perhaps some of you gentlemen will appreciate, an upbeat cover of an eric clapton song that we lovingly called in the '80s "ska-caine." >> jimmy: oh, the song "cocaine" -- >> it was a little faster in our vers
>> jimmy: that's a weird thing. is the band still together or have you broken y ohio. no, i dropped out of that college and -- i dropped out of that college and moved to new york city because i liked the music a lot better when i wasn't playing it, so i wanted to go to new york in the early '80s. >> jimmy: did you move to new york to become an actor? was that the plan? >> no, i wanted to go where bands like the talking heads and the specials and -- kids, look it up. some '80s bands were playing. and i liked it so much i just lived there and i worked as a guard at the guggenheim museum and was a little bit homeless. and like that. >> jimmy: you were homeless? for real? >> i was for quite a bit. i kind of managed to stay on people's couches. and then i found this incredibly kind guy at nyu whose roommate had just flunked out and he said you can stay here. and he even i think helped me find someone wholesale helse wh flunked out and grabbed their meal card. so i w
an nyu dorm though i wasn't a student at nyu. and the payoff to that story is it's someone you that know well. >> jimmy: yeah. >> because he was the first e.p. of this show. a wonderful chap named daniel kelison. >> jimmy: yes. he's our former executive producer and my business partner put you on his -- he saved your life. in a way you owe me. [ laughter ] yes? >> i always knew i did. i just didn't know why. thank you, jimmy. [ applause ] >> jimmy: you're welcome. >> yeah, thanks. daniel kelison, ladies and gentlemen. >> jimmy: and is it true or false that daniel asked you to leave because you were drinking too much? >> no. after three months i actually was surprised he hadn't done it already. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. when we come back we'll see a clip from "marvel's agents of shield." clark gregg is with us. we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live!" are brought to you by heinz bbq sauce. five great new regional flavors made with the masters!
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it's good to see you again. you look field," airing tuesday on abc. clark gregg is with us. will the events in the show be affected at all by the captain america movie? >> i believe so. i don't really know because i haven't seen it yet. i'm going to go directly from here. >> jimmy: so they really don't tell you anything -- they don't trust you at all. >> i mean, when you say it that way. no, in the past they've shown us stuff. like season 1 they said you have to see this now, we're going to take you to a screening, and we went and saw "captain america: the winter soldier." and at the end of it we walked out and shield didn't exist anymore so, we thought we'd have to change the name of the show. i don't think that it's necessarily -- i
i may call you in tears in a few hours and find out i'm out of work. >> jimmy: do you eve and all of executive producers are by the monitor and everyone's like don't look at him. don't lookme.ashe last time that happened? >> kind of recently. >> jimmy: does that mean that -- but we've not seen it on the air yet? >> hey, you're squeezing spoilers out of me. >> jimmy: i'm sorry. >> my big mouth again. >> jimmy: i'm an attorney. i have to do what i have to do. >> you're very good. yes. it might be that someone's going to die. >> jimmy: oh, wow. >> it's a good show. people like it. it's fun. some shows people get killed off and they're like ha, ha, see you later suckers. but on our show they g
they cry a little. >> jimmy: do you say to the person, it wasn't that bad for me. i'll start the hashtag x lives. it's rdbi coming back. and i was like, i don't think so, pal. [ laughter ] you look like silly string. i don't see how that's going to work. >> jimmy: it's very good to clark egg, everybody. we'll be right back with katie couric!
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to reduce our carbon footprint rylask: m jamie raskin,ght and i approve this message. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest has been in our lives at every time of day -- mornings, afternoons, evenings, and now she is available to you anytime online. she is the global news anchor for yahoo, and has a new documentary called "under the gun" premiering may 14th on epix. please say hello to katie couric. [ cheers and applause ]
very good to see you, katie. >> i am so happy. i haven't seen you in so long. >> jimmy: it has been a little while. i think we're in new york the last time -- you got married since the last time i saw you. >> i did. [ applause ] >> jimmy: your husband john. i saw him at the pacquiao fight, actually. >> yes. he told me he sat next to you. he was with his son henry. >> jimmy: we sat next to each other. i was wondering at that time because i know he's a very wealthy guy. did you move into his place or did he move into your place? >> he actually moved into my place. >> jimmy: he moved into your place. >> because he had a house in -- well, actually, he had an apartment in the village that was sort of a bachelor pad. so that wouldn't have really worked for me. so he moved to the apartment where i raised my girls. and now we're moving to a new apartment that we're sort of starting together. so he doesn't feel like he's had to absorb into my life so much. >> jimmy: neutral territory. >> exactly. >>
away everything he owns? >> he's kind of a minimalist. and hoarder but i'm an accumulator. i have so much stuff. i've started to go through stuff i've accumulated over the last 17 years since i moved to this apartment. so i've seen like "new yorker" magazines from 2010 that i know i'm going to read. or ointment from 1994. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. that's no good anymore. >> exactly. >> jimmy: all hoarders think they're not hoarders. they think they're accumulateors. right? >> i'm not really a hoarder, though. so anyway, we're going through that process and we're moving i think in september to a brand new apartment, which is nice. >> jimmy: that will be nice. [ applause ] >> oh, thank you. people are so happy that i've finally found someone to marry me. because it was a long time. >> jimmy: were people starting to worry about you? >> i think they were a little bit worried because you know, my husband passed away. and that was in 1998. and i had a series of boyfriends.
but they never seemed to pan out. yrpt jimmy.my: why? >> jimmy: well, you founded ayo cancer. >> yes. >> jimmy: that just honored you. [ cheers and applause ] in a way you became the most -- really you became the face of the human colon. >> i did. i'm like the colon queen. well, some of you might remember, but i think it was back in 2000 i did a colonoscopy on the "today" show. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and you know, it's because i wanted to educate -- >> jimmy: i just bought it on dvd, by the way. [ laughter ] >> have you been watching it in slow-mo? >> jimmy: i have my ways. i won't reveal them. >> but anyway, after i did it colon cancer screenings went up 20% and the university of michigan called it's couric effect. >> jimmy: right. yeah. >> which was both flattering and creepy. and the incidence of colon cancer i think between 2000 and 2010 declined 30%.
so stand up to cancer,tth night million. >> jimmy: nd app the -- that's in addition to the 370 million that we've pledged donations since we started the organization in 2008. >> jimmy: that's unbelievable. >> yeah. it's really -- it's a really -- i'm so proud of what this organization has accomplished because we work with all these doctors from different institutions and we force them, we mandate them to collaborate rather than compete. and two doctors spoke at this event on saturday and they said how they used to compete against each other and be rivals and then they decided let's not compete against each other, let's compete against cancer.
and they're really making incredible strides. we're all -- you'd welcome any kind of input. well, you welcomed an input of a camera, for instance. >> i did. but institutions -- cancer like everything else is political and proprietary and people compete and they want to get credit for all the different things that they do and the developments they make. but with stand up to cancer i think they were first a little wary about joining forces and now they're so jazzed and invigorated to work together. so people from m.d. anderson will work with people from sloan-kettering, you know, with -- so it's really a national effort. and we also have dream teams internationally as well in amsterdam and canada. >> jimmy: at what age are you supposed to get a colonoscopy? >> i'm glad you asked, jimmy because how old are you? >> jimmy: well, you tell me what the age is first. [ laughter ] >> at the age of 50 you should
>> unless you have a family history, and then you should get it earlier. 'm >> you're 48. >> jimmy: it's coming up. >> all right. so in two years you and me -- it's in november, isn't it? >> jimmy: it is. >> i will take you -- i took al roker for a colonoscopy. i'm going to take you for a colonoscopy. [ cheers and applause ] i'm going to spend the night. i'll stay in your guest house if you have one. i'm going to have you drink the prep, which is called golightly. and it's the worst named beverage in america because it does not make you go lightly. i'm going to help you through it. >> jimmy: okay. >> really? >> jimmy: yeah. >> seriously? >> jimmy: can we bring mr. t to the event? that's a photograph from nancy reagan's funeral. >> yes. i went to mrs. reagan's funeral. we actually got to be quite close through the years. >> jimmy: did you ask mr. t why he dressed in his a-team outfit for the funeral? >> it was kind of incongruous to see him there with james
former ambassadors. by the way, that's my cute husband next to me. >> j. he seems very happy to be with mr. t. >> he is very happy. but isn't that strange, that he was at nancy reagan's funeral? but they used to do a lot of just say no stuff together. >> jimmy: i remember that. >> and punky brewster. i was looking at the other celebrities. michael jackson used to do a lot of just say no stuff. >> jimmy: he was not there, though. he didn't show up. >> no. >> jimmy: that would have been something. [ laughter ] that would have been a hell of a picture. >> just mr. t. >> jimmy: your documentary, which i saw today, it's very powerful. >> thank you for watching it. >> jimmy: it really is unbelievable. it's called "under the gun." >> yeah. it's going to be released as you said i think it's may 15th or may 14th on epix. and it's going to be free and then available on v.o.d. at the end of the month on itunes and amazon. and it's really a comprehensive look at the gun issue in america. and i think it will change the way you look at it. one of the exciting things we found, jimmy, is there is a lot of common ground. 74% of nra members
favor universal background checks. many of them don't understand why you can be on thenra repres wns incountry. so we had a lot of people watch the film and say you set the t a reasonable and sensible conversation about common sense gun laws. >> jimmy: hopefully people will not have their minds made up before and they will watch it and then make a decision for themselves. >> definitely. we're hoping people will talk with each other instead of at each other because there is, as i said, a lot of gray and a lot of agreement and a lot of common ground, which is exciting. >> jimmy: will you hold my hand when we're in the hospital together and i'm getting a camera put in my rectum? >> if they let me. if they let me. >> jimmy: katie couric, everybody. "under the gun" premieres may 14th on epix. we'll be right back with deftones. [ cheers and applause ]
presented by samsung. >> jimmy: i want to thank clark gregg. i want to thank katie couric. benedict cumberbatch. i want to apologize to matt damon. we did run out of time for him. "nightline" is next. but first, this is their album. it's called "gore." here with the song "prayers/triangles," deftones! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ there's a new strange godless demon awake inside me ♪ ♪ there's a force divine te
this is "nightline." >> tonight, skim bilk. the sophisticated and diabolical new ways scammers are helping themselves to your hard-earned cash. >> this is very easy, and it's a lot of money. >> and that chip that was supposed to do the trick? don't count on it. but there are new ways to protect yourself from high-tech credit and debit card skimming. plus, it may have the look and the luster of the city of light or the romance of venice, but don't be fooled by these far east fakes. >> the eiffel tower. >> our bob woodruff taking us on a colorful journey of copycat towns springing up all over china. even a wild, wild west. but where is everybody? plus, the apocalyptic prank two brothers pull on the