tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC January 7, 2016 11:35pm-12:37am EST
reluctant sunshine? captioning provided by caption associates, llc www.captionassociates.com >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, cate blanchett! dominic monaghan! "this week in unnecessary censorship." and music from vance joy! plus cleto and the cletones. and now, you know what? here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i'm jimmy.
thank you for watching. thanks to all of you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] a quick question. how many of you here in our studio audience bought tickets for the powerball to play the lottery? nobody? [ applause ] well, those of you who are happy, rest assured your odds of winning are just about exactly the same as all the people who did. so the powerball jackpot is at $700 million, which is like -- it's roughly one "star wars" movie. you could make your own "star wars" wars". [ laughter ] it's the biggest lottery jackpot in history. never before has the total been this big. nobody won last night. so they're going to do it again on saturday. it was originally reported that miss colombia had won the jackpot. but that turned out -- [ laughter ] she's had a really tough month. [ cheers and applause ] this is funny. this is from fox 5 in las vegas. there's no lottery in the state of nevada. so people who don't have any way
and 7-eleven and whatever there drive to the border of california to buy lottery tickets. and reporters will go there to to conduct ill-advised interviews on live television. >> do you know your chances of winning? >> slim to none. >> slim to none. you're right. let me tell you. it's one out of 292 million. what do you think about that? >> i knew it. >> you knew it? your numbe are lucky, though, am i right? >> i hope so. >> can i ask you, if you won all the money, what would you do with it? >> bunch of hookers and cocaine. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he wants to pump the money back into the economy. she asked. [ laughter ] senator marco rubio is taking heat today for his choice of footwear of all things. he's been mocked by several of his republican opponents for a pair of stylish boots he made the mistake of wearing this week. these are the boots. now, ted cruz, rand paul, carly fiorina all tweeted about the boots.
you know, his wife probably bought him the boots for christmas and then he wore them and now everybody made dpun offun of him and now he's mad at her. but the big question is when it comes to celebrity fashionon who wore it best, marco rubio or kim jong un? [ cheers and applause ] i'm going to go with marco. i don't like that matchy-matchy thing. meanwhile, on the democrats' side, bernie sanders still wearing the same pair of rockports he bought in 1982. [ laughter ] donald trump went on the offensive today, which is a very rare thing for him. he released a new attackk ad against hillary clinton that's about as trumpy as it gets. >> women's rights are human rights, and human rights are women's rights. once and for all. let's keep fighting for opportunity and dignity. [ applause ] >> jimmy: he could also put a
by the way, if donald trump wants to get into a who palled around with who thing, he might want to buy up all the copies of these photographs. [ laughter ] and d don't make us open the "celebrity apprentice" file either. our current president, the one named obama, is gearing up for what will be his final state of the union address on tuesday night. his aides have been describing the speech that he plans to give as non-traditional. which he probably means he's going to do that watch me whip, watch me nae nae dance, right? [ laughter ] his last one, why not have a little fun with it? the winter storm known aelz nino got us pretty wet and we don't like it. we really don't know what to do when it rains here. people were ordering mai tais last night just for the little umbrellas. [ laughter ] but today was pretty nice. rain is expected to come back in force this weekend. rain is a good thing for us because of our drought situation. but this is interesting. experts say el nino might not help us much with the drought. most of the storms are hitting
northern california, where most of our reservoirs are that store the -- it's kind of like if you were dying of thirst and someone washed your feet. [ laughter ] the rain was the big story on our local news all week. cbs affiliate in san diego did a story on flooding in their area, and they really got a sense of how negatively some residents have been affected by this. >> you look at all of this water, this car is submerged, and i am knee deep in water. i don't dare walk to the bottom of this park lot. but we got reaction from one driver who had his car stuck in this. we really feel for him this morning. >> [ bleep ]. [ bleep ] [ bleep ] [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: i don't think i've ever seen that before. it's a new one. it doesn't happen much that a local reporter will get lucky and get something like that. most of the time they have to traipse all over town knocking on doors trying to get any kind of anything from anyone involved
and lately we've been keeping track of these and we put together this tribute, if you will, to all the hard-knocking tv news people out there. [ knocking ] >> no one answered at gonzalez's home. [ knocking ] >> no one answered at the owner's door this afternoon. [ knocking ] >> no one would open the door. >> no one answered the door. >> no one answered the door. [ knocking ] >> no one answered the door. >> no one answered the door. >> no one answered the door. [ knocking ] >> no one answered the door. [ knocking ] >> no one answered the door. [ knocking ] >> no one answered the dodo. >> no one answered the door. >> nobody answered the door. >> no one answered the door. >> no one answered the door. >> nobody answered the door. >> nobody answered the door. >> blanch, do you want to tell your side of the story? >> no!
before i call the police. >> jimmy: that's blanch. [ applause ] well, at least she got something out of blanch. nobody uses the doorbell on tv news. it's all the old-fashioned -- new york today became the 23rd u.s. state to offer legalized medical marijuana. but you can only buy marijuana in non-smokeable forms, pills, liquids, oils, that sort of thing. no cigarettes, no brownies, no pop tarts, no gummy bongs, no heshey bars. it's not easy to get a prescription. in order to get medical marijuana in new york you must have an actual medical condition. here in california you can bet a prescription for a sunburn. [ laughter ] you go in and say oh, my back -- they go, you know what? don't even bother. here. [ laughter ] this is something that would be hard to explain to a stoner. general motors is teaming up with lyft, the car ride service that's like uber, to build a fleet of self-driving cars.
the idea is these cars would someday be used to take passengers wherever they want to go without a driver. which to me sounds like a great way to get accidentally taken to another citit because you typed in the wrong movie theater and then your phone dies and you can't change it. [ laughter ] but it's thursday night and we have a tradition around here. we bleep and blur the big tv moments of the week, whether they need it or not. it is "this week nun necessary censorship." [ cheers and applause ] >> tonightht glimpse into the future. technology that can blow your [ bleep ] will be unveiled starting tomorrow in las vegas. >> i would like to say [ bleep ] you to the world and [ bleep ] you to the planet. >> just a few weeks ago almost every candidate in the republican field was [ bleep ]ing donald trump. today almost every candidate in the republican field is [ bleep ]ing me. >> we ought to [ bleep ]. i'd [ bleep ] his ass if i could. >> you've got a what? a stiff [ bleep ]? i've got a stiff [ bleep ] 24
>> listen to people reacting fought snowy conditions. >> as you can see my glassed are all [ bleep ]ed up. >> i think size matters. >> you do? >> i think the size of your [ bleep ] matters. >> there you go. i like that. >> my [ bleep ] is better than yours premieres abc tomorrow. >> it's nice to meet you. >> so excited. it seems like we never [ bleep ] the same guy. >> i think it would be difficult for two girls to share a [ bleep ]. >> you weren't here friday. no, you weren't. and we know where you were. >> i was [ bleep ]ing. so to speak. >> you were [ bleep ]ing. >> chris christie's got a big monster [ bleep ] and he's [ bleep ]ing people. >> can i answer? >> [ bleep ] like a kid again. >> yeah. >> don't worry, farmer fred, we'll get that pony off your [ bleep ]. >> ya, ya, whoa! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. when we come back, a student from clemson and a student from
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back. dominic monaghan and music from vance joy is on the way. but first, on monday from glendale, arizona it's tiger versus tide as clemson takes on alabama in the college football playoff national championship game on espn. this is the first time these teams will meet since 2008. the winner goes home with the national title, and the fans needless to say are fired up.
annual cfp scavenger hunt. [ cheers and applause ] let's begin and meet our competitors. first representing the crimson tide, coming to us live from her home in tuscaloosa, please welcome what is that, gigi? gigi thomas. >> hi, jimmy. >> jimmy: hello, gigi. what are you majoring in? >> restaurant, hotel management and modern computer science. >> jimmy: computer science. restaurant -- so you'll either be a computer scientist or work in like a shaky's, right? >> correct. >> jimmy: you're a big alabama fan i presume basas on your -- >> born and raised. >> jimmy: what's that, bear bryant on your wall? >> mm-hmm. the man himself. >> jimmy: you're not kidding around. let's meet your competitor tonight. she's a ph.d. student at clemson coming to us from her apartment in that very city. please say hello to kimmy. hello, kimmy. [ applause ] >> hi. how are you? >> jimmy: i'm doing well, kimmie. you are all decked out in your school. >> i am.
>> that is what i wear to the games. all 14 of them. it will be the 15th this coming monday. >> jimmy: so you're a little bit superstitious, huh? >> i'm very superstitious. >> jimmy: what are your game day rituals? >> besides wearing the same clothes, i actually have a best friend who went to undergrad here with me. before every game, whether he's in person or not, we will face-time. we'll hold it up and take a shot for championships. >> jimmy: very nice. >> hold on one second. i've got something for you, jimmy. >> jimmy: uh-oh. what is it? ziggy zaggy ziggy zaggy oy oy oy oy you've got to do a beer. it's okay. >> it's the clemson twist. i'm not a copycat. >> jimmy: will you and gigi like to say something to each other before we begin? any words you'd like to exchange? >> would you like to go first, gigi? >> i was just going to say good luck to you. honestly.
if you're read yiy to see what a real heisman winner looks like? >> i guess we'll see. he already won it. >> jimmy: i like this. here. this is a scavenger hunt. i will name an item or give you task. your job is to find that item or complete the task as quickly or impressively as you can. if you fail, you will bring shame and misery to your school. are you ready? >> i'm ready. >> jimmy: round 1. first challenge. bring back something you stole. something you stole. no hesitation there. [ laughter ] we have the police waiting outside their apartments. [ laughter ] i hope one of them comes back with like a rembrandt or something. oh, kimmie is back. kimmie, what have you? that is? >> an actual rock from death valley. >> jimmy: you stole that from death valley? >> i did. well, borrowed. >> jimmy: well, somehow you've
but yeah. you're way out of focus -- and gigi, what do you have? >> i stole olaf. >> jimmy: from where did you steal olaf? >> this poor little asian kid. >> jimmy: what? [ applause ] kimmie, you're out of focus right now. clear that -- turn that -- there you go. now you're in focus. boy. i'm going to have to give that one to kimmie just based on principle alone. [ cheers and applause ] we must not steal from children. you said it was a kid. anyway, the points have bebe awarded. there's nothing we can do. round 2. destroy something that belongs to your roommate. all right. here they go. like maybe they're working on a
something -- the more irreplaceable the better. right, guillermo? >> that's right, jimmy. >> jimmy: thank you very much. oh, there they are. okay. gigi, you're back. gigi, what do you have? >> this is my roommate's and she loves it and i'm going to rip it up just for that. >> jimmy: this is what, her homework? gigi. >> no. she actually really loves this book. >> jimmy: oh, all right. and kimmie, what do you have? >> i have a "sports illustrated" which she's going to hate that i'm about to destroy. >> jimmy: okay. well, do it. destroy it. and let's see. [ cheers and applause ] all right. all right. now burn your apartments down. [ laughter ] all right. your next challenge -- i'm going to call that a tie -- is to draw your team's mascot on the wall
the bigger the better. go get a pen or a bottle of ketchup. this challenge is always called the lose your security deposit challenge. [ laughter ] okay. yeah. you've got to do it so we can see it. okay. there you go. all right, kimmie. what are you drawing with there, kimmie? >> oh. lipstick. >> jimmy: okay. keep drawing. keep going. and if gigi ever gets back, she should start drawing also. >> i'm here. >> jimmy: kimmie, you're not an art major, are you? >> no. i'm an engineer. >> jimmy: that is a very delicate-looking tiger you're drawing there. [ laughter ] and gigi, what are you drawing with? what is your utensil of choice? >> this is eyeliner. >> jimmy: eyeliner. okay. all right. nobody had a pen, huh? [ laughter ] let me see what's going on there.
okay. all right. now, is that -- can you remove that or is that permanent on the wall? >> i think mine's permanent. >> jimmy: yeah, yours are both permanent. you know what? i think we're going to call this a tie and we're going to make you both winners here. [ cheers and applause ] as a reward for your vandalism we're giving you each a pair of tickets to the national championship game. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, kimmie and gigi. >> thank you. >> jimmy: a good waste of time, it turns out. have fun. tonight on the show we have music from vance joy, dominic monaghan is here. we'll be right back with cate blanchett. so stick around. [ cheers and applause ] this is iphone 6s. not much has changed. except now you can say... hey siri... hey siri... hey siri... which changes how you get in touch. call sophie. how you get answers... penelope cruz: who was the prime minister of britain in 1868? the answer is benjamin disraeli. of course.
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>> jimmy: hi there. welcome back. tonight a very talented actor and also a crazy person. he has a show on the travel channel called "wild things with dominic monaghan," dominic monaghan is here with us. [ cheers and applause ] and then this is a special edition of his album. it's called "dream your life away." music from vance joy tonight. [ cheers and applause ] we have a good week next week. from the "x-files," dave duchovny and gillian anderson will be here. ice cube as will leslie mann. ariana grande, josh holloway, from "downton abbey" joanne froggat, jacob tremblay, chloe grace moretz, and music from city and colour,
so please join us for all that. our first guest tonight is a multioscar and golden globe-winning actress whom you know from a bushel of excellent films. she is currently nominated for a golden globe for her performance in the movie "carol." it's in theaters now, please say hello to cate blanchett. [ cheers and applause ] you look fantastic. [ cheers and applause ] thanks for coming. how's everything? how's life? >> things are pretty good. i feel like i saw you last wednesday. >> jimmy: yeah. you were here in october. thank you for coming back so quickly. >> but not a lot changes. i was kind of hoping -- i hope you don't -- i mean, i don't know you that well. but i was hoping the bathrooms might have changed a little bit. >> jimmy: what do you mean? >> i mean, i don't know how old --
>> i don't know about your bathroom. but the cast bathrooms backstage -- >> jimmy: oh, in the guest room? the guest dressing rooms. >> have you been back there? >> jimmy: i think i have. >> i get the kind of soviet-era communist gray -- >> jimmy: is it bad? >> gestapo sonderkommandant kind of feeling. >> jimmy: can we put a camera back there? it will take a minute but we'll get there. >> it's the fourth time i've been here. and i thought maybe it was an accident, maybe abc had run a little short on change. >> jimmy: well, that's probably true. yeah. is it bad? is it really bad? it's so bad you're thinking about it? >> do you not know? >> jimmy: all right. here's your dressing room. >> it's gray. >> jimmy: that's not that bad. >> you have all these happy pictures of -- there's someone in a sling. but it actually looks better on the screen. >> jimmy: ah. >> if you turn it around,
kind of faux stingray thing. did someone flush the toilet? it's like a kind of showroom for the tile. >> jimmy: oh, you're right. there's a lot of -- >> i'd give you some pointers. but it's like you've got the pebble work going on. you sit in there and it's literally -- it's really -- no, it would probably get a b-plus in terms of hygiene. >> jimmy: oh, it's clean. >> i don't mean to misrepresent -- >> jimmy: that's very rare for us. >> -- you or your network. >> jimmy: b-plus is the highest grade we ever got. >> but it's really disturbing. i don't know what yours is like. >> jimmy: mine's worse, actually. this one looks better than mine. it looks like there was like a sample sale. [ laughter ] >> it does. >> jimmy: but they didn't have everything. >> it's like the showroom for the tile company. >> jimmy: i'm so sorry about that. >> maybe during the day abc use this is place as kind of a display home. >> jimmy: no. we're here during the day. should we paint it do you think?
some pointers. >> jimmy: next time you're here, i make you this promise, it will be exactly the same. [ laughter ] [ applause ] and maybe down to a c-minus. hygienewise the grade may be lower but otherwise -- >> but you have all these really happy photos of people up there. >> jimmy: that's right. >> that's before they go into the bathroom. >> jimmy: i bet your home is beautifully appoint, isn't it? >> no, we've just packed up our home. >> jimmy: you did? >> we had our last christmas in our home. >> jimmy: you did? >> it was sad. >> jimmy: how was christmas? in australia? >> yeah. we have christmas in australia. we believe in santa claus. it's a christian country. >> jimmy: it's summer over there, right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: do you have the same traditions we have here there? >> we do. my dad was american. but we -- our youngest is 7. i hope he's not watching because he believes in santa claus and it's so lovely. we get the flour and the footprints and put the trail out for santa. >> jimmy: what do you leave for santa?
they just go and get the cooking wine and pour it out. >> jimmy: you leave wine for santa? >> yeah. or beer or a little cocktail. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: really?. >> you don't that? >> jimmy: no. it's milk and cookies for santa. he's driving. [ applause ] he's driving animals. >> jimmy: yet you have two college students doing shots, destroying -- what kind of country is this? >> jimmy: well, it's a country of hypocrites is what it is. >> any sort of santa that's been leading up to that zenith that's christmas eve you need a bit of cooking wine or a beer or -- >> jimmy: maybe at that point his journey when he's with us, it's earlier on or -- i don't know whoa gets to first. >> no, we're the first port of call. >> jimmy: are you really? because i thought he was in the north pole. yes? >> no. he's in the south pole. >> jimmy: santa's not in the south pole. >> oh, yes, he is. >> jimmy: you've got a different santa you guys are working with.
>> the beard. >> jimmy: hat? >> hat. reindeer. >> jimmy: i think you may have the one from the mall. i don't think you have the real santa. [ laughter ] >> have you done the thing with your kids where you take them to sit on santa's knee. >> jimmy: yes. >> it is the most distressing -- >> jimmy: they hate it. my daughter, she screamed like a maniac. >> why do we do it? because our parents did it to us. >> jimmy: we did it twice. we took her back a second time as if she's going to have a different reaction one week later. and she screamed the second time also. yeah. your kids are 7 and -- >> 14, 11, 7, and a year. >> jimmy: so it's a whole different thing now. do you take the kids to the movies or -- >> i thought you were going to say to the mall. no, we took them to "star wars" of course. like 17 times within 24 hours. >> jimmy: did you like "star wars"? >> it was amazing. >> jimmy: oh, good. >> did you? >> jimmy: oh, i loved it. >> you didn't like it? what's wrong with you? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: hey, hey. i'm more american than you are.
i give milk to santa claus. >> no, my son went at midnight. >> jimmy: he did? >> we got the millennium first in the southern hemisphere and we probably got "star wars" before it was even made. >> jimmy: oh, you did get it before everybody else. >> so we went to a midnight screening and it was so exciting, you know, when the scroll came up and everyone cheered. it was a real event. >> jimmy: did you love the old "star wars" movies? or did you -- >> i'm old enough to remember them, yes. >> jimmy: me too. i remember going to the first one -- >> you mean the old new ones or -- >> jimmy: the old real -- the good ones. >> no, it gets really confusing because when people talk about the first -- when i talk about the first "star wars" movies my sons are talking about the middle. >> jimmy: because that's the order -- kids don't know what's going on. well, you have a drunk santa claus. who can blame them? [ laughter ] we're going to take a break. en we come back, we'll see a clip from -- once again you're nominated for a golden globe. the movie's called "carol."
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but if you leave it, we go to court. and if we go to court, it'll get ugly. and we're not ugly people. >> jimmy: that is cate blanchett in "carol." [ cheers and applause ] it is in theaters now. you're nominated for a golden globe for best actress in a drama on sunday. do you think you're good in these movies? you're so good in them. >> i can't watch -- i'm amazing. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: do you watch them and go -- >> i can't watch them because i have this really, really embarrassing habit of when i see it i start tearing up when the character tears up. and i start laughing when the character's laughing. >> jimmy: you're imitating. >> it's not pretty. >> jimmy: really? >> no. no. >> jimmy: wow. >> lucky it's half anywhere near approaching passable on the actual screen. >> jimmy: on sunday you'll be sitting at a table. it's different at the golden globes. you sit at a round table, right? with your -- with your fellow nominee.
>> jimmy: with your competitor and co-star in the film rooney mara. >> yes. >> jimmy: so then one of you wins, the other can -- i mean, you can go dwlur purse. you could -- >> anything could happen. >> jimmy: eat her dessert. i you name it. >> yes. exactly. >> jimmy: they say it's more fun because people drink and get to talk during these shows. >> it's like a mosh pit, actually. it gets very sweaty down there. there's tables -- it's like there's not enough ketchup on your table. you lititally lean and get dicaprio's ketchup from the table behind you. you're all very tightly packed. it's quite sweaty. >> jimmy: wow. it's that close, huh? >> it's really close. >> jimmy: and dicaprio doesn't mind you taking his ketchup? >> i don't know. i haven't needed ketchup. i don't know. maybe he -- maybe he pockets the ketchup. you know the mini kech gyps? >> jimmy: oh, yeah. the mini ketchups. do you like those? >> mini mustards. they're the best. >> jimmy: they're like some indestructible material. i have to do them with my teeth.
toucan biting into that -- you dodot do that. you're too classy. >> no, i usually use a knife. >> jimmy: and the bathrooms are okay for you at the golden globes? [ applause ] that's something you -- >> well, normally you're so stitched into those dresses that you just -- you cannot drink anything because if you have to pee it's a disaster. >> jimmy: oh, right. wow. that's terrible. >> it's so hard to be an actress. >> jimmy: there's a lot of torture that goes on. it really is. why doesn't somebody go enough with this, i'm wearing sneakers, i'm wearing big jeans and i'm going to wear a frumpy sweatshirt? >> you should be a stylist. that's the look. >> jimmy: my interior decorating, my styling, i'm do with all this stuff. >> the movie's really great. i enjoyed it. [ cheers and applause ] and you're great in it as usual. it's almost ridiculous. i heard you are going to be in the next "thor" movie. is that true? >> yes. chris hemsworth is busy, and -- [ laughter ]
or are you dodging the question? >> no, i'm not dodging the question. they're just substituting one australian for another. gender equality. why can't you have a female thor? >> jimmy: you have to understand how important these comic books are to people. >> you're getting aggressive. >> jimmy:er, i'm getting aggressive. tell us -- well, listen, if you're going to be in thor you have to be ready to fight. >> anything with a bit of a workout regime i could do with. >> jimmy: oh, very good. all right. well, we'll look forward to that. and we'll see you at t t golden globes on sunday night. cate blanchett. the movie's called "carol." it's in theaters now. we'll be right back with dominic monaghan. [ cheers and applause ] l? yeah. it's too good to be true. not again. real estate never goes down. fact. we'll have the baby, and i'll have my band, and it'll just work. right. don't worry about it honey. all of our family photos are right here (banging sound) on the hard drive. it's called a timeshare. we don't own it, we share it.
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please welcome dominic monaghan. [ cheers and applause ] did you guys -- did you and cate have a "lord of the rings" reunion? >> you know, we had like a really -- can i just say, by the way, you have the most spectacular bathrooms i've ever seen. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you. >> absolutely stung. >> jimmy: that's very nice of you to say. >> i'm only saying that because we had a moment in the bathroom, cate and i. we took a selfie in the shower. weird, yeah? with cate blanchett. and she was like these bathrooms are really bizarre. and i was like, yeah, they are a bit bizarre. and i was like what's more bizarre is i'm in a shower with cate blanchett taking a selfie. she was saying to me i can't look at the camera. i'll look at you and then you look at the camera. and i was like, i need the face of giorgio armani. i'm very confused you why can't look at the camera. >> jimmy: it's an actor thing. you can't look at the camera.
i like your beard, by the way. >> jimmy: i like your beard too. >> we have the same thing -- >> jimmy: and i like your ears and your eyes and your whole face. >> sweet man. we have the same thing going on with our beards in the sense that when i started to get stubble when i was a kid, when i was 12, it started right here. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> which means that that is the place that's going gray first. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> so i did just for men. >> jimmy: you did? >> i do just for menuite often. >> jimmy: you did not. >> i did. >> jimmy: did you? >> i totally did. can you not tell by my chin? i totally just for menned -- >> jimmy: you don't need, that though. you have blondish hair. >> you i was nervous to see you because you said you were going to take me for a lovely midnight fast. and i thought i want to look as lovely as possible for jimmy. >> jimmy: this is turning very romantic. >> i didn't know you were going to be kind of scrubby around the edges. >> jimmy: don't worry. it's very soft. i condition. i want to talk about this show. >> you love it, don't you? >> jimmy: listen, i don't
i don't approve of it. i don't know what you're doing. to me the very last thing i would want to do. but you love it so much. >> i'm saying to a friend of mine backstage earlier on, i was like, we have brought in certain -- or we've certainly invited people to come and do the show. we've had billy boyd come and do the show. i've invited viggo and orlando and elijah. i feel like i'venvited you at one point via an e-mail and your reply was [ bleep ] that [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> jimmy: i did say that. i didn't mean to be rude. >> i get it. >> jimmy: if there were no snakes involved i would be much more inclined to be on the show. but let's just show a clip of what's going on here. >> a chicken coop such as this would be easy pickings for a snake. what i'm hoping to do is just clean it up. this is actually good because what we want with this snake is
its energy so that when we work with it it just relaxes. >> jimmy: that is a terrible idea. [ cheers and applause ] and there's children around. >> small children around. which could have been eaten by that animal. >> jimmy: when the locals are startled and scared you shouldn't be grabbing the snake by the back. >> that was in mozambique where they're very fearful of snakes. there's not a lot of them around. >> jimmy: it's called having common sense. [ laughter ] >> certainly big ones like that. but what we do when we get to a certain -- any country we're in we say if you see a large reptile you're fearful of please call us and we will take it out of that place you've seen it and make the humans safe and also make the snake safe as well. it was in a chicken coop. it had been injured. someone actually stabbed it. they had a spear and they tried to kill it. you can't kill a snake with one stab. you're probably going to need to stack it like 100 times. they're super resilient animals. we did some surgery on it.
it was a very jungle bookie moment for me. it climbed a tree, and i was like, see you later, ka. >> jimmy: which is the most deadly snake that you have personally touched? >> probably the scariest in terms of what aherpatologist would say has the most capability of killing you is the black mamba. it's smart, it's athletic, it's super venomous, it's very dangerous, and again, in south africa i said if anyone sees anything that might abe cobra or a mamba let me know. a friend of mine called donald called me up. and it was in a house. it was in someone's bathroom. someone's bathroom and worked with it for an hour. and made it safe. the cool thing about those stories is the humans are scared, the snake's safe, we make the humans safe, make the snake safe, we make a bit of i get to hang out with the animal. >> jimmy: why are you not scared england. you're not from the jungle. >> i work with these type of i have these type of animals at home. >> jimmy: how many of these
>> at the momentt have three snakes, two tarantulas, a praying mantis, a scorpion, a centipede. bees. i have like 30,000 bees on my property. you should come over. >> jimmy: not in the house, though, right? >> no, not in the house. that would be like trying to get to the kitchen it would be a nightmare. >> jimmy: you count the bees as your pets? >> well, not necessarily pets but i do have those animals on my property. >> jimmy: i see. >> and at some point in the next month or so i'm going to harvest their honey which will turn into hobbit honey. and then i'll give you a jar or [ applause ] >> jimmy: is it going to be -- are you allowed to dothat? >> i'm going to go down to farmer's markets and sell it for like $25 a pot and be super famous. >> jimmy: you're turning into a crazy person is what's happening. [ laughter ] i hope you don't getbitten. how many episodes this season? >> we did 13 this season. mozambique. i swim with the biggest fish in the world, the whale shark.
amazing creature. 13 episodes everyone wednesday night on travel channel and also oln in canada. getting into the ocean with a animal like that it's a harnlless creature it doesn't hurt you, it doesn't eat you. but when something like that's coming toward you its mouth is twice the size of you and you're thinking this is a harmless animal. and it offered me its dorsal fin as if to say jump on. [ laughter ] and i was like, you know what? i will. and then i swam around on top of the biggest fish in the world for like 20 minutes. one of the greatest days of my life. >> jimmy: i imagine four it would be. for me it would be the last day of my life. [ laughter ] >> i don't think it would be quite as good as dinner tonight. but we'll see. >> jimmy: are you hitting on me? what's going on here? the show's called "wild things with dominic monaghan." returns january 27th on the travel channel.
away." here with the song "fire and the flood," vance joy. [ cheers and applause ] i was only walking through your neighborhood saw your light on honey in the cold i stood anywhere i go there you are anywhere i go there you are i been getting used to waking up with you i been getting used to waking up here anywhere i go there you are anywhere i go there you are there you are there you are
and i always feel you in my blood everything is fine when your hand's resting next to mine next to mine you're the fire and the flood since we met i feel a lightness in my step you're miles away but i still feel you anywhere i go there you are anywhere i go there you are and late at night when you can't fall asleep i'll be lying right beside you counting sheep anywhere i go there you are anywhere i go there you are