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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  January 28, 2016 11:35pm-12:37am EST

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cc1 test message and now, abc's "jimmy kimmel live." >> jimmy: from hollywood it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight - ewan mcgregor, comedian hannibal buress, "this week in unnecessary nsorship" -- and music from tory lanez with cleto and the cletones. and now, get it together, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i'm jimmy, i'm the host.
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thanks for coming. sweet passionate love, i appreciate it. last night was guillermo's birthday. i say we had a 432-foot-long margarita funnel. it started on the roof, went four flights of stairs down to our studio. it put the "fun" back in "funnel" last night. you drank quite a bit. >> guillermo: i had a greatat time. >> jimmy: yeah, we had to send you home in a car. >> guillermo: yeah, your assistant took me home. >> jimmy: my assistant took you home? when you got home your family was there, did they have dinner ready for you? >> guillermo: they had food but i told them, let's cut the cake, i'm tired, i'm going to go to sleep. >> jimmy: you skipped your birthday dinner? >> guillermo: yeah, i was tired. >> jimmy: what food did they have for you? >> guillermo: thai food. >> jimmy: wow, this is a melting pot, you know? all right, so you went right to sleep.
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did your son know you came home from work drunk? >> guillermo: no, no, no. >> jimmy: hee did not. at what age do you think he'll start to become aware of that? >> guillermo: maybe next year. >> jimmy: maybe next year. earlier tonight on fox news the republbcan presidential debate, without donald trump, which to quote the great crooner from the '80s orange juice jones is kind of like corn flake without the milk. trump as you probably know refused to appear in the debate because of a dispute he's having wi fox news and one of their he'ses, megyn kelly. he's had a problem with megyn kelly ever since she followed him back to his cottage in the woods and found out his real name is trumpelstiltskin. he refused to be part of the broadcast like a kid who took his ball and went home. he tweeted, the debate tight will be a total disaster, low ratings withadvertisers, advertising rates dropping like
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i'm sure. i'm sure it's really tearing him up inside to see it. if this were wwe, donald trumpp would have shown up in iowa tonight with a mask and a folding chair and started beating everyone over the head. unfortunately it isn't. dr. ben carson was also not present for the debate. i mean, he was there. he participated. but he just wasn't present. we have a clip? this is what the repeplican debate was like tonight bout donald trump. [ laughter ] cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i've never seen a wrestling move like that. i'm trying to find a way to work that in.
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this week from the reverend jerry falwell jr. when trumpisited his school, liberty university, falwell said, this is a quote," in my inion donald trump lives a life of loving and helping others as jesus taught." you know, yeah, he does remind me a lot of jesus, the same kind of humility. almost like they're the same guy, really. it does seem strange that a christian leader would endorse a candidate who's kind of a poster child for the seven deadly sins. in case you're not familiar they are pride, greed, lust, envy, gluttony, wrath, and sloth. which in this case -- [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: -- is living on his head. this is fox news, retired army lieutenant colonel ralph peters talking about the situation in afghanistan. it's fun to see a highly decorated army guy get his
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>> we cannot afford to dump money on these problems any more. we've got to think -- we've got to smite fart -- fight smart. as our enemies are doing. >> we understand what you're trying to say. >> jimmy: yeah. i don't know if our enemies are smiting farts, maybe we should be helping them. on the democratic side, bernie sanders i iacting a little donald trump-y, said he wants more debates but not on hillary clinton's terms, he wants them on his own terms, specifically two hours long with a lf-hour break in the middle so he can watch "wheel of fortune." and they also cannot be scheduled on nights when he has his hip-hop dance classes. this is good news for bernie sanders. according to a new government report, more americans are living to be 100 years old and older than ever. which is scary because it means we could have 90 more years of justin bieber. but it is -- this is interesting. 80% of those who live past 100 are women.
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in other words, very smart move by bruce jenner, switching to caitlyn. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he multiplied his chances of living by four. living longer means people will be working longer to have enough money to coverhem when they can't work anymore. a lot of older people are doing now as a part-time job, becoming uber drivers. uber, for real, uber teamed up with aarp to recruit older drivers. i no you think it's a joke but it is not a joke. one-quarter of uber drivers are overgy and many are much older than that. think of it like miss daisy driving you. only problem i i you can't drive for union fer your car's more than ten years old. and what elderly person has a car that is newer than ten years old? two them tops, maybe. so many retirement-aged people areeriving for uber now that
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feature on the app. >> at uber we offer many options to suit your lifestyle. now that so many retired people are signing up as drivers, we are proud to introduce uber old. select uber old and within hours an elderly person will pick you up. >> are you joe? >> hi, that's me. >> what? >> that's me. >> are you joe? >> yeah. >> with uber old you'll ride in style with the finest seed covers. and during your ride you are guaranteed to hear the full l le story of at least two grandchildren. >> i just hope she finds a nice man who isn't popping drugs this the time. but my grandson nathan -- >> yeah, the lalyer. >> my grandson nathan is a lawyer. >> uber old gets you to your destination in twice the time of a regular uber. >> this is good right here. >> okay. >> wherever it's safe. >> oh! there you go, dearie. >> oh! >> can you rate five stars?
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>> you know, i mean, do you know how to do it? >> oh -- yeah, here, just click the fifth star. >> this one? >> you're in the camera. >> oh. >> no, you -- you've got to get -- you're still in the camera, you've got to get out of the -- go to the uber app -- >> uber old, because everything else these days moves too damn fast. and for drivers whoho are no longer legalal allowed to drive, uber rascal. >> [ bleep ]. >> joe? >> uber old. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's over. or is it we're going to take a break. when we come back from the break, we asked kids what the best country in the world and is this they had some funny answers. "this week in unnecessary censorship" too. stick around, we'll be right back!
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there it is... this is where i met your grandpa. right under this tree. (man) some things are worth holding onto. they're hugging the tree. (man) that's why we got a subaru. or was it that tree? (man) the twenty-sixteen subaru outback. love. it's what makes a subaru, a subaru. who knew dates and cashews mashed together could taste likea cookie? you think they'd taste like dates and cashews. nope, cookie. weird.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ewan mcgregor, hannibal burress, music from tory lanez. there's new barbie dos on the way. for years there's been criticism about barbie's physique being unobtainable, a false image for girls. barbie is now available in three new body types. kendall, kylie, and khloe i think. no. no, here they are. alongside the classic barbie, the first one, that is petite barbie. i guess to make shorter girls feel better? she's like kind of fun-sized. the next is tall barbie. that's prressive. they made her from a model into a supermodel. and this is what they call curvy
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also known as barbie-q. and i guess this is the one that's supposed to represent real women's bodies? why is curvy barbie dressed like an insane person? why is she wearing a bow like the one you see on cars when the husband gives his wife a new mitsubishi for christmas? mattel says t tse new barbie dolls are designed to more accurately reflect the body types of the creepy middle-aged men who collectthem. i don't know, hopefully this will make young girls feel good about themselves, i don't know. from my own point of view it always made me feel better about my body knowing ken had no penis. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, this is kind of interesting. yesterday a group called transparency international released a ranking of the most corrupt countries in the world. there was a tie for most corrupt between north korea and somalia. so congratulations to them. the united states finished 16th,
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ranking we've ever had. the three least corrupt countries are denmark, finland, and sweden. the less -- i think when it's dark 80% of the day, no one has the energy to do anything wrong. you know, we hear a lot, especially during campaign season, about how great america is or how great america was. we grew up -- i grew up hearing that america was number one. and i never questioned that. we are number one, dammit, we'll kill anyone who says we aren't. but i wondered what kids today think. so we sent a camera crewn the street to ask them, what is the best country in the world? and this is what the kids had to say. >> what is the best country in the world? >> mm. i don't know. >> what do you think the best country in the world is? um -- chicago? >> what do you think the best country in the world is? >> i think it's where we are
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>> why do you think that this is the e st country in the world? >> because i just love this world. >> what do you think is the best country? >> paris? france? >> you think france is the best country? how come? >> um -- because there's usually a lot of like cute poodles there and i like poodles. >> what do you think the best country in theorld is? >> new york. >> why is new york the best country in the world? >> because you can ice skate. >> what other countries have you been to? >> disney land. >> did you know kids in switzerland get to spend all their days in swissnyland, which is like disneyland, and they don't have to go to school? >> yes. >> you know that? doesn't that make you want to move there? >> no. >> it doesn't? >> i mean yes. >> what do you think the greatest country in the world is? >> america. >> why?
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and -- yeah. >> what about north korea? there they give everybody a free haircut and a rocket. >> no. >> you wouldn't want to live there? >> no. >> why not? >> because what if they do bad haircuts? >> if you could live in any country where i do woo want to live. >> california, so here. >> have you ever been to australia? >> no. >> do you know there that each kid gets their own koala bear. >> really? >> uh-huh. and they don't have to do homework ever. >> really? >> yes. >> i want a koala bear. >> what do you think the best country in the world is? >> i guess japan. >> how come? >> because they have a very beautiful palace. >> where's the palace? >> it's kind up in the straits. >> who lives in the palale? >> a king and a queen. >> where dididou learn about it? >> i guess i just thouout about
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>> you made it up? >> uh-huh. >> you didn't really learn about it anywhere? >> no. >> have you ever been to any other country? >> nuh-uh. but i've been n sacramento. >> can you name five countries? >> america. california. michigan. and china. >> one more? >> um -- yogoland. >> paid for the yogurtland department of tourism. >> jimmy: all right. tonight it's time to bleep and burr blur the big tv moments of the week whether they need it or not. it is "this week in unnecessary
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>> a brand-new monday, and this is what's going on today. time for a big [ bleep ]. >> my [ bleep ] is in your hands. do with it as you will. >> not only will i [ bleep ] trump i will suck his [ bleep ] personally. >> look at [ bleep ] here. >> michael, you hurt me with that [ bleep ]. you really did. but that's okay. >> what do you think of each of these ladies? >> what do you think? that's a better question. >> [ bleep ] them all. >> i love black [ bleep ]. you should enjoy [ bleep ]. >> we're talking about national [ bleep ] your dog month. >> january is national [ bleep ] your dog month. >> only donald trump c [ bleep ] center stage. >> the football team, come on, university of iowa, look at the size of these [ bleep ]s, they're monsterer >> you have the greatest job in america and you have the biggest [ bleep ] begin on your face. >> i called her and that is when their dog jumped their fence and [ bleep ]ed my dog from behind
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>> let me tell you something, derek. where we come from, [ bleep ]ing a man's [ bleep ] is against the law. >> i don't care. >> jimmy: tonight on the show w have music from tory lanez, hannibal burress is here, and be right back with ewan mcgregor so stick around! [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: portions of jimmy kimmel are brought to you by icy hot smart relief tens therapy. turn on smart relief and turn off chronic pain in your back, hips, knees, and shoulders. stand out. by design. that feeling recaptured.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi there. tonight a very funny gentleman with a new comedy special that premieres next friday on netflix, hannibal buress is here. then, from toronto, this is his single. it's called "say it." tory lanez from the samsung stage tonight. this is a scary picture by the way. it looks like his fingernail's going through his nose. next week, we have a great week of guests including kate winslet, richard dreyfus, jason sudeikis, lionel richie, channing tatum, regina king, george clooney, dave salmoni will bring his wild animal friends, and we will have music from old dominion, kopecky and elton john will be back. he couldn't stay away. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: please join us for ch and every one of those
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our first guest tonight is a two-time golden globe-nominated actor who successfully battled heroin in "trainspotting" and sith lords in "star wars." now he is the villainous cowboy colin mccann in "jane got a gun." it opens in eaters tomororw, please say hello to ewan mcgregor. [ cheers and applalae ] >> jimmy: how are you? >> good, and you? >> jimmy: very good to see you. >> great to see you. the actor who successfully battled heroin? i was standing there going, no, i didn't. >> jimmy: in that role. >> yes, yes. >> jimmy: i was impressed that you rode a motorcycle here tonight. >> i do, i ride everywhere most of the time. unless i've got one of my kids with me. i'm usually on two wheels. >> have you evererut a side car on the motorcycle? >> i do. i have a side car. but it's a bit unsafe to put
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some people do that. i ride around with my dog in there. >> jimmy: a dog. >> i harness him, he can't jump out. >> jimmy: he must love that. >> dogs like having their head out the window of the car. >> jimmy: yeah. way. >> it's overload, he's complete completely -- just trying to keep anytime the heroin world. >> jimmy: our band leader cleto when we were kids had a bicycle called a side hack othe side. >> oh yeah. >> jimmy: i would get in the side hack. then he would drive me into garbage pails all the time. into walls and stuff. >> have you known each other that long?? >> jimmy: since we were kids. >> i made "big fish" years ago. [ cheers and applause ] i had to ride a side car in that. and then -- beautiful actress, alison low man. no, that was -- i don't know, saying good-bye to her. then they took -- they did the shot of me riding away and i
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i hit a garbage can, spinning in the air. >> jimmy: that's what happened to me. you posted photograph on instagram that i'd like to show. let's put that up on the wall. i'm curious to know, first of all, how old are you in`this picture? >> 16. >> jimmy: is this your first car? >> yes, it is. >> jimmy: a volkswagen bug, obviously. what year was the volkswagen? >> it was a laid one. 1978. beetle. i think it came from south after xa. it's got weird fenders on it. the wrong taillights and stuff. apparently it's from south africa. i don't know how it ended up in scotland but it did. >> jimmy: the reason you put on it instagram is you're looking for it? >> i'd like it back. >> jimmy: you want it back. >> yeah, i love v ws and i've got several of them. i won't mention how many. i've got a few. >> jimmy: what do you have, what kinds? >> my daily one is a 1954 oval window bug. >> jimmy: all beetles? >> all beetles. my hair's sticking up in the back. >> jimmy: well, look at it there. >> yeah, exactly.
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i've got a bunch of vws and this one i think about all the time. i think it's long gone. >> jimmy: nobody responded? >> i've tried and trie >> jimmy: how would they know? they look pretty similar. yeah? >> well, because i know that the license plate -- >> jimmy: the license plate, you think it stayed? i see. >> stayed the same, yeah. anyway. i think it rusted away and it's gone, sadly. >> jimmy: and this bottle of champagne, was there for drinking? or for christening? >> it was a christening. i was 16 years old. and i'd washed -- i was a dishwasher -- i went to school, i was educated, almost. i went to -- washed dishes in a hotel from the age of 14 to save up to buy a car. at 16 i found this one for 500 kid in aberdeen. and i drove up there with my dad. you know, we drove it back. >> jimmy: isn't it the best when you save up for something and then you buy it? it's really much better than it just being handed to you. >> yeah, i know. i really valued it and i loved it very much.. i wasn't able to drive it for
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in britain you can't drive till you're 17. >> jimmy:: wow. >> i did drive. i did take it out now and then >> jimmy: of course, yeah. we're going to show a clip from your manufactury but i i want people to see what you look like so that they recognize you when they see the clip. you are almost unrecognizable. that is you for sure? >> yes, that's one of the paparazzi shots that you don't -- i was having my hair dyed for the film. because i haven't got dark hair. i came out of the salon and there was a bank of these [ bleep ]s. waiting for me. and i go, for [ bleep ] sake, not now, i've got a big handlebar moustache -- >> jimmy: you look like a village person or something. >> anyway, yes, that's what i look sort of like in the movie. >> jimmy: most people don't know that you, i didn't realize this, that you're in -- >> an ex-heroin addict?
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>> yes. [ cheers and appppuse ] >> jimmy: how many people -- how many of you remember seeing ewan in the movie? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: okay. >> they really gave themselves away. >> jimmy: they're lying. because you're a voice in the movie. >> i recorded a line for it. it was very late in the day. i'd been waiting for the call to come for two years. >> jimmy: really? >> maybe they've lost my agent's phone number? and then i got called. just shortly before it was released by j.j., and he asked me to come in. he said, i'd love you to be part of it, love you to be in it. and there's a sequence where we can use a voice. we hearbi wan ken nobodiby's voice coming from the decent reaches of the forcer wherever it does come from. >> jimmy: oh, yes. >> i was like, yeah, i i love to be in it, i've been waiting for your cali. i was able to see some of it before anybody else had seen it. very impressed.
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>> jimmy: they did a melding? >> yes. >> jimmy: of your voice and alec guinness' voice? >> yes. the line is "rae, rae --" i've got to channel him again. "rae, these are your first steps." but they got alec guinness to do rae, which is extraordinary because he's not alive anymore. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: j.j.'s really impressive, yeah. >> amazing what they can do these days. but they found -- they got a line of him as obi wan saying "afraid." then they custody the "a" and "d" off and got the "rae." alec guinness is saying "rae," and i say "these are your first steps." >> jimmy: that's exciting. we're going to see a clip when we come back," jane got a gun." ewan mcgregor is here.
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where is she? >> i don't know. >> jane! putting a bullet in your boyfriend! >> going to shoot me in the back like the coward you are?
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>> it appears she's left you once again, mr. frost. >> you so much as flinch and i will blow your head off. >> jimmy: ewan mac gregor in "jane got a gun" in theaters tomorrow. what is the idea of the movie? what is it about? >> well, i don't want to give it away. >> jimmy: oh, well -- >> berlin, berlin. it was a film that was really a challenge to get made. i think they started and stopped making the film three times. i came on really last minute. ththe's a very long list of other actors. >> jimmy: i heard -- >> -- who wanted to play my role. >> the director didn't show up or@something? >> i don't know exactly what happened. >> jimmy: well, i do. >> you do, yeah. i'd rather you say it than me. >> jimmy: they had to call a temp agency or something and say, get a director. >> the director was brilliant. some other actors attached to
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i'd gotten back from "son of a gun." i was only making films with "gun" in the title. they said, can you get to new mexico? like tomorrow? and i went, yeah, all right. off i went. i've always wanted to make a western. >> jimmy: is that -- for an actor, dressing up as a cowboy? >> it's so great? like a childhood dream? a way. >> i've always wanted to do . there's not many scottish westerns, really. this was my chance to make one here in america. and i loved it. and i got to play the bad guy and everything. it was really great. >> jimmy: are there nonamerican westerns? i guess there would be maybe mexican westerns. >> australia. i think australian -- probably some -- i don't know. >> jimmy: i don't know either. >> most of them -- most of the old spaghetti westerns were shot in spain, weren't they? >> jimmy: i don't know, i didn't know they had spaghetti in spain, but that's probably -- >> it's very close to italy. >> jimmy: someone saw you in "star wars" as well. so what was that? that was your first western?
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price of one because i was shooting this film up there in new mexico. and a day when i was only in the first scene then the last scene. i had all day to hang around. i knew seth mcfarland was shooting "a million ways to die in the west." on "a million days to lie in the west." or whatever. i went to visit them, because i knew people in the cast. i was saying hello to charlize theron and she said, do you want to be? it be in it? i had the moustache and everything.. i went to their wardrobe, and i had to wait there to be shot in a film i wasn't eally in. >> jimmy: did they kick somebody out of the movie to put you in? >> no, it was a group scene and they gave me a line to say. so i am in that. i'm now in two westerns. >> wow. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're a free spirit. it was very good to see you. the movie is "jane got a n." it opens in theaters tomorrow.
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be right back with han mall
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aflac. ohh ah ah aflac! aaaaf-lac! ta-daa! he's not a very good magician. he paid my claim in just one day. one day?! shh! how does he e it? in just one day, we process, approve and pay. one day pay, only from aflac. here i am in cancun. this is me talking to la policia. this girl? totally sweating me. and uh, i don't even remember taking this one. u realize this is a job interview. i know, i wanted to show you how proficient i am in social medidi we'll be in touch. excuse me. hello? hi, i'm just following up on the interview. dimpatient. dim and impatient.
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so we invented new snickers crisper. that a big bull. i think that's old cyrus. 1800 pounds of do whatever the heck i want. take the long way, huh? thank you cyrus. lease a 2016 lincoln mkc for $289 a month
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still to come, music from tory lanez. if all you've been watching on netflix lately are murderers being made, our next guest has a w standup special to cheer you up, "comedy camisado" premieres a week from tomorrow. pleaseseay hello to hannibal buress. [ cheirs and applause ] >> what's up, man? >> jimmy: i'm admiring your shirt, what is going on there? >> my shirt? it's a lady taking off her panties by standing by a dog. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> it's laundry day. this wasn't my first choice. >> jimmy: how are you doing? i see you n tv all the time, i saw you in the movie with will ferrell, mark wahlberg. things aring going well? >>hings are cool. >> jimmy: is standup still your
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>> no, i like selling cell phones now. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thatould be an interesting left turn for you to take. >> i did a commercial for a cell phone company. and so i started having people hit me up out of nowhere. a buddy from high school wrote me saying, hey, man, saw t tt commercial, real cool stuff, i got to come check o o a show. >> jimmy: really? >> he wants to check out my standup based on seeing the cell phone commercial. and i think it would be weird if he came to my show and then was disappointed that i wasn't talking about phones. he's like, you don't talk about phones, you just talk about feral relationships and traveling all the time. you didn't talk about cell phones once. >> jimmy: you did a show in japan? >> you been to japan? >> jimmy: never been, no. >> tokyo's crazy. way more japanese people than i thought, way more. i expected there to be a lot of japanese people?
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japanese people than i thought. it was so many people. >> jimmy: and did you -- where did you perform there? >> at this -- at a british pub in japan. >> jimmy: oh, realal? >> yeah, in tokyo, a british pub. >> jimmy: did you look around? i imagine you got plenty of time to plore. >> ate lot of noodles. had noodles about 15 times. >> you're not interested in fish that kind of thing? >> i had some fish on the side of my noodles. >> mostly noodles. have you performed in the country where english is not the primarlanguage before? >> no that was the firsttime. it was interesting just trying to -- japanese is a character-based language. >> jimmy: yes. >> you can't just pick it up. i don't know spanish, i don't know french, but i contact loo at spanish and french words and say, i see what they're going for. >> jimmy: rit. >> okay, i see the angle, i can maybe guess. when i look at japanese? i just think, oh, that's a ladder.
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that's all i got. please bring me the englglh menu. >> jimmy: did you do any other countries in asia? >> i went to dubai. >> jimmy: wow. >> united arab emirates. >> how did you wind up there? >> they said, here's a bag of money, do you want to do standup in dubai? and i said, sure, yeah. that is the right amount of money. >> jimmy: : at was that like? >> it went well, man. it went well. it's very rich people. it's a lot of money. they waste money on stuff in dubai. i got pitched. i was walking through a mall, some dude casually said, you want to buy an apartment that's half under water? but not even a hard sell. he was just like, as i walked by, if i would buy on it a whim. like, sure, i'll get that $2 million underwater apartment. that's real. >> jimmy: intentionally under water? >> ah, under water. >> jimmy: people live in them? >> i think they live in them two months out of the year and rent it out the rest of the time, yeah. >> jimmy: wow. very strange.
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>> yeah, it's very weird. we went to an open-air market ththe. and a lot of these guys -- it's very kind of a narrow place where, you know, little shops on either side. it's a lot of salesmen selling the same thing. >> jimmy: right. >> so they have to stand out. anddo the thing they would do, they'd try to gauge what country you're from. then yell out something real quick. one or two words to try to get your attention. so they would engage -- my group was american. they would yell out "oh baba!" one guy yelled out "hakuna matada!" what does thdt mean? that is racist? is that an insult? one%guy is like, "what's up, dude?" another g g is like," yes, exactly!" that was his bit. "yes, exactly." how do you know -- i want to do business with you. >> jimmy: yeah, right.
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your special is "comedy camisado." >> that means military attack that occurs at night. >> jimmy: really? >> there's nothing funny about it. >> jimmy: no, no. >> i like how the word sounds. i had my buddy hajj jesus send me words for a tour name a a i took it. >> jimmy: he found it in the spanish dictionary? >> i don't know, because another word he came up with was [ bleep ] waffle camisado. i'm like, i can't call my tour [ bleep ] waffle camisado. >> jimmy: do you find now that you're well known that people are coming to your shows specifically to see you, instead of just coming to a comedy club? like do you ever bomb anymore? is it always solid? >> it's mostly -- mostly professional. i keep it professional. because people deserve it. they pay money. one show, it fell apart. >> jimmy: where was this show? >> west palm beach.
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>> november 2014. oh, man. mymy buddy al, his friend -- we were on tour, t t last day of a ten-day bus tour. his buddy had -- he had a yacht club membership. we went out on a boat, drinking all day, then me and al drinking on the bus. at some point i forget there's a show. >> jimmy: oh. i remember getting in the cab on the way to the show. when i got to the show? i didn't realize a show was happening. we got to the green room and i was looking at all the stuff. oh, pineapple? but i didn't realiziz i said, why is all the stuff that i like here? i thought i was being set up. that show did not go well. i still hear about that show. >> jimmy: for real? >> i post about it. yeah, i'll be in phoenix and sosobody like, don't mess it up like west palm beach! it was one show! and that was a special experience! nobobo else gets that show. >> jimmy: that's true.
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that's a unique show! one of one it's right there! me drunk, it was great. so sweaty. >> jimmy: very good to see you, i'm happy for for you. >> thanks. >> jimmy: watching the netflix special. "comedy camisado" premieres one week from tomorrow on netflix. hannibal buress, everybody! and we'll return with music from tory lanez. [ cheers and applause ] >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel
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>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by samsung. >> jimmy: i'd like to thank ewan mcgregor, hannibal buress and apologize to matt damon we ran out of time. "nigigline" is next but first making his late-night television debut with the song "say it," tory lanez! just keepin' it honest you wouldn't want a young -- if i wasn't
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that's why i came back top down you gon have to do more than just say it you gon have to do less wheh you do it lil mama you know i show it always want you to prove it you gon have to do more than just say it you gon have to do less when you do it lil mama you know i show it so you gon need to more than just prove it ooh babe and you know you know and you know in this foreign car let it go and you know you know and you know in this foreign car let you know but how you know that i want you and you want me but i not know you know i know that this ain't right cause you and me cause i got dough ever since you walked in inside my foreign slam my door you know i know that you been on it but i been on it on the low so let a young -- get down on it yeah love when you spin round on it yeah evethough a young -- want you
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the truth and when i come down on it yeah you love when i'm down on it yeah you know i'm gonna spend time on it yeah that's why i came back top down you gon have to do more than just say it you gon have to do less when you do it lil mama you know i show it always want you to prove it you gon have do more than just say it you gon have to do less when yoyo do it lil mama you know i show it so you gon need to more than just prove it oh babe and you know you know and you know in this foreign car let it go and you know you know and you know in this foreign car let you know gots to break it down for you to let you know you know there's things you know i'mown for ain't goin act like you ain't bout my dough you know i know but girl you know i'm down for take your time
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the time to waste no baby streamin out the foreign out to play you know its things it takes so let a young -- get down on it yeah love when you spin round on it yeah evev though a young -- want you shawty i promise the truth andhen i come down on it yeah you love when i'm down on it yeah you know i'm gonna spend time on it yeah t tt's why i came back top down you gon have to do more than just say it you gon have to do less when you do it lil mama you know i show it always want you to prove it you gon have to do more than just say it you gon have totoo less when you do it lil mama you know i show it so you gon need to more than just prove it oh babe >> i like to break it down for my man mars on the keys. we got t. love on e boards, ladies and gentlemen. it's none other than uncle chuck on the guitars. and carlos on the drums.
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occasion for one reason only. we got the oginal brownstone in the building, baby. say it baby do it do it baby show it show it baby prove it say it do it show it say it say it say it do it show it prove it all i'm tryin say i just wanna see your body move in different ways all i'm tryin say come close to you you make me come thru i get so close to you
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my girl might leave me tf she hears about this l.a. confidential l.a. confidential i hope she never has to hear about this l.a. confidential ohh cause you know i got somebody so i can't -- with just anybody but sometimes i get lonely i get lonely so let me keep it real with you real with you can you keep it real with me real with m% when i get lonely
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