tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC May 31, 2017 11:35pm-12:37am EDT
everything has led to this moment. tonight you're on "jimmy kimmel live." >> yes, i am. >> are you ready for this journey? >> i think i'm ready. >> because this could be the most dramatic, shocking interview in "jimmy kimmel live" history. >> yeah, but -- >> will jimmy propose? >> he's married. >> shocking. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight, jim carrey, "the bachelorette" rachel lindsay, and music from bush. and now, remain seated, here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice.
i'm jimmy, i'm the host. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. [ cheers and applause ] oh, wow. what a night. it is a special night. i don't know if you can feel it, but love is in the air. love is on the air tonight with the return of "the bachelorette" to abc. the bachelorette herself rachel is here with us to explain -- [ cheers and applause ] but first we have -- it was a big day for foreign relations and relating with foreigners as donald trump traveled abroad for his first field trip overseas as president. [ laughter ] i'll tell you something he never disappoints and this is no exception. he did maybe the weirdest thing i've ever seen a president do. no, not maybe. he did the weirdest thing -- [ laughter ] -- i've ever seen a president do. but we'll get do that. but the president and first lady visited israel today. trump arrived in tel aviv this morning with his wife malaria. [ laughter ] melania. sorry. watch this. this is interesting.
he went to held her hand and she kind of gave him a little kind of get that away from me. i'm an body language expert but i think that's a sign for "i'm supposed to be shopping on fifth avenue right now." [ laughter ] either that or his hand is so tiny she just didn't see it. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i would love to know what happened. in spite of whatever's going on domestically, the president made history today by becoming the first sitting president to visit the western wall. now, i don't know what's going through his head here. my guess is that he's pretending to be praying or something. [ laughter ] >> we're not paying for this. don't get any ideas. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wait a minute. you were in jerusalem today? >> yeah. >> jimmy: he really gets around. before his visit to israel trump was in saudi arabia. this is where the wheels came
off. first of all, his commerce in saudi arabia. that's why. people without heads tend not to speak out. anyway, do you remember when trump criticized president obama for bowing to the saudi king? this is his tweet. "barack obama bowed to the saudi king in public yet the dems are questioning mitt romney's diplomatic skills." well, here is donald trump on saturday bowing to the saudi king. yes. by the way, he didn't just bow. let's look at that again. he bowed and there was a little curtsy there too. [ laughter ] [ applause ] you know what? the king bought him a beautiful necklace. why not? [ laughter ] trump also went after michelle obama back in 2015 for deciding not to wear a head scarf when she was there.
he tweeted, "many people are saying it was wonderful mrs. obama refused to wear a scarf in saudi arabia but they were insulted. we have enough enemies." and then his wife, mrs. trump, got off the plane in saudi arabia. and guess what she wasn't wearing. that's right. a head scarf. but she did wear clubber lang's title belt from "rocky 3." [ laughter ] [ applause ] and now one more blast from the past. trump posted this to facebook. "saudi arabia and many of the countries that gave vast amounts of money to the clinton foundation want women as slaves and to kill gays. hillary must return all money from such countries." well, yesterday a woman's empowerment fund started by ivanka trump accepted a $100 million donation from saudi arabia. at this point we're not too far from finding out that trump was born in kenya. we really aren't. [ laughter ] [ applause ] but it wasn't all that. there was some good stuff. trump took time to meet with the president of egypt. these guys, they really seemed to hit it off.
[ speaking foreign language ] >> translator: never have i seen a money of such colors. at first glance he is like a pumpkin. but as you look deeply he takes on a bright tangerine with hair like flowing grains of wheat. he is a one-man tequila sunrise. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: meanwhile, back in washington, d.c. even though there was no daily briefing from sean spicer the white house press office still found a way to screw up. they put out this press release today. it says, "the president is overseas to promote the possibility of lasting peach." [ laughter ] i guess it was supposed to be peace. but who knows? i mean, the president's got a lot of fruit on his plate. he's trying to make peach in the middle east. he's still got sour grapes about the election. and every morning he goes bananas on twitter. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] maybe this is his most presidential moment yet.
or maybe they've heard the word "impeach" so much it slipped into the press release. [ laughter ] but that wasn't even close to the strangest thing that happened on this trip. trump was in riyadh yesterday for the opening of something called the global center for combating extremist ideology. and this is without question the strangest thing i've ever seen a president do. okay? a big group of vips including trump made a dramatic entrance with lights and music like a david blaine special. [ laughter ] maybe a sex scene out of that movie with nicole kidman and tom cruise. you know? "eyes wide shut." anyway, with the saudi house music thumping the president and the egyptian president and the saudi king laid hands on an orb. a white glowing orb. and trump moved on that orb like a bitch. [ laughter ] you know, when you're famous, you don't even have to ask. they let you do it. but that was a very strange -- i guess that's their version of a ribbon cutting ceremony over there.
but i have to say the president seemed kind of different after he touched it. >> the orb has spoken. the orb is all. such a fantastic orb. terrific orb. all kneel before the orb and be bathed in purifying fire of its light. hail orb. that i can tell you. >> jimmy: all right. meanwhile, back at what trump calls his winter white house, mar-a-lago in palm beach, this is weird. a sinkhole is forming. this is a 4 by 4-foot hole in the earth right at the entrance to mar-a-lago. why, nobody knows. oh, wait. [ laughter ] we do -- this is satan's way of saying the door is always open. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i don't want you to worry, about the orb, i really don't. we have a top-notch show for you tonight. we have music from bush tonight. the great jim carrey is here. [ cheers and applause ] freshly released from tonight's season premiere, the bachelorette rachel lindsay is here.
[ cheers and applause ] earlier tonight rachel met all 31 of her hand-selected suitors. as they usually do, some of the guys tried to be creative at the top to make an impression. one of the guys dressed as a penguin. another one had a puppet. and then there's jonathan, who thought it was a good idea to do this. >> hello. >> hi. i'm jonathan. >> nice to meet you, jonathan. >> so good to finally meet you. >> i know. you too. >> i heard you're looking for a man who could make you laugh. so i wonder if i could have you do something with me. >> let's do it. >> could i have you open your hands for me and hold them out like this? >> okay. >> hold them a little further. then could i ask you to close your eyes for just a second? >> oh, no. scared. i'm ticklish. >> i wanted to make sure you had at least one good laugh tonight. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: before i lock you in my trunk and drive you to the desert. [ laughter ] and guess what. jonathan got a rose. he got a -- he got the traditional please don't kill me rose. [ laughter ] rachel. but of all the introductions tonight the most notable was
made by a gentleman named lucas, who showed up with his very own catch phrase. >> it's all about waboo. >> waboo. >> it is about waboo. if you want a glimpse of it i can give it to you now. >> okay. >> waboo! >> that's just a glimpse? >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] he went on to say waboo no less than 30 times. it was so -- is it possible they accidentally let a crackhead into the mansion? [ laughter ] i can't imagine this guy getting a date with -- not only the bachelorette, with any woman ever. but not only did lucas make a strong first impression on rachel, here's how the act went over with the other guys. >> good evening, ladies and gentlemen! woo-woo-woo-woo-waaaaa-boooo! >> that's the crazy one. [ laughter ] [ applause ]
>> jimmy: by the way, rachel, i don't know what she was thinking, but she didn't send lucas home. he got a rose. it's now down to lucas and 22 other men. later on i'll share my prediction for who rachel will pick. i'll give you a hint. it's not waboom. [ laughter ] this is a big week here at abc. tomorrow night we have the season finale of "dancing with the stars." i personally have a lot riding on that. i made a bet at the beginning of the season. a picked a long shot, nfl running back rashad jennings to win. he is in the final three. i've got 14-1 odds on. between "the bachelorette" and "dancing with the stars" it's like all my favorite sports are happening at once. [ laughter ] i'm actually starting to lactate. i really am. [ laughter ] hey, speaking of celebrity dancers, here's one more nugget from president trump's vacation. ♪ [ laughter ]
he looks like he'd rather drive that sword into his own stomach than -- what is it with these world leaders forcing our leader to dance? we never do that to them. you never see angela merkel pressured into a hoe-down in dallas. [ laughter ] part of the problem is the music. you know, you change the music to make it something a little more universal, maybe the sword dance could be fun. ♪ go shawty ♪ it's your birthday ♪ we're gonna party like it's your birthday ♪ ♪ we're gonna sip bacardi like it's your birthday ♪ ♪ and nobody gives a it's not your birthday ♪ ♪ i got what you need >> jimmy: so painful. [ laughter ] imagine for a second. close your eyes. i won't tickle you. [ laughter ] just imagine. imagine president obama if he flew to saudi arabia, danced with a bunch of sword-carrying saudi arabians and then laid hands with them on a large glowing orb.
if that happened, your uncle would explode. [ laughter ] and no amount of fox news would be able to bring him back to life. but donald trump is in a category entirely of his own. he's only been overseas for four days and already he's created memories that will last a lifetime. but only if you order now. >> the president's historic first trip to the middle east. a milestone in u.s. foreign relations. and now you can relive all the magic, mystery, and confusing rhetoric about islam with the president trump "great moments in international diplomacy commemorative plate collection." impress your guests with iconic images of the president of the united states curtsying to the saudi king. >> so cute. like little girl. >> jimmy: dancing with swords. swearing allegiance to a crystal ball. and who can resist melania's free-flowing hair next to a tweet about michelle obama's uncovered head? and if you order now, as a
special bonus offer we'll throw in sean spicer at home in bed crying, absolutely free. >> wow. it's a great deal for your money. >> this offer like trump's presidency is only for a limited time. call today. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: tonight on the show we have music from bush, rachel the bachelorette is here, and we'll be right back with jim carrey. so stick around. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> dicky: portions of "jimmy kimmel live" brought to you by xyzal. welcome to maxx you. you are whimsical, vibrant, statement making. you stand out in a crowd. and are pulled together. you follow your own lead and show your strength. always comfortable in your own skin. we see what makes you unique.
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the bachelorette herself, rachel lindsay is here with us. tonight not only will i make my pick for who rachel winds up with. she will also be subject to a lie detector test. so we will get right to the truth. i have correctly predicted eight out of the last ten bachelor and bachelorette pairings. which i think is like 90%. that's why they call me rosetradamus, folks. so later tonight i will ruin the show. then their latest album is called "black and white rainbows." bush from the mercedes-benz outdoor stage. [ cheers and applause ] you can see bush live on tour starting may 30th in seattle, washington. tomorrow night we have a big show tomorrow night. fresh off two sold out performances at the rose bowl u2 will be here in celebration of the 20th anniversary of the "joshua tree" album. [ cheers and applause ] then we continue the week with zac efron, jada pinkett smith, connie nielsen, jon bass and music from lil yachty and zac brown band. so please join us for all of that. our first guest tonight is an exceptionally funny person with a new tv show about other funny people. the show is called "i'm dying up here."
jim? how's it going? >> good. [ cheers and applause ] i just wanted to see what would happen if you stayed until they got tired. [ laughter ] usually people sit down during the biggest part of the applause. >> jimmy: yeah, right. yeah. >> so i thought i would see what that's like. that space. [ cheers and applause ] at the edge of the envelope with the blue devil. it's uncomfortable. >> jimmy: well, yeah. it is. >> lovely, though. thank you so much. >> jimmy: but worth exploring. have a seat here, jim. >> yeah, why not? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you doing? >> good, man. >> jimmy: how's life? everything good? >> you know, it's so beautiful. it really is. especially when i'm absent from
it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you feel like you're separated from the rest of the world and what's going on? >> no. not separated at all. in fact, it's the exact opposite. you know, i -- don't get me wrong. jim carrey is a great character, and i was lucky to get the part. [ laughter ] but i don't think of that as me anymore. >> jimmy: you don't? not at all? >> no. not really. i used to be a guy who was experiencing the world. and now i feel like the world and the universe experiencing a guy. >> jimmy: just got a little taste of that just a moment ago. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and does the beard have anything to do with that? >> well, here's the thing. the beard, yes. everywhere i go people talk about the beard. they go what are you doing? why are you growing a beard? they can't really think about anything else. it's just not cohesive. there's something different about me, and it's that damn beard. and wherever i show up it becomes the story. you know? >> jimmy: right. >> it's a bigger star than me at this point. >> jimmy: and is that good?
>> if has its own twitter. >> jimmy: it does? [ laughter ] >> yeah, it's really good. thank god it likes me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: maybe it will be president one day. you know? >> exactly. >> jimmy: that's the first step. >> anything can happen now, right? but yeah it's just weird. i always say the question is not why are you growing a beard. the question is why am i growing a beard and still shaving my balls? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] it doesn't make any sense. >> jimmy: it doesn't. you're right. >> it doesn't make any sense at all. i think it's a balance thing. it's like if i'm shaved down then i've got to do this. so if i ever shave my face again you'll know. [ laughter ] where it went. there's a full beard somewhere. >> jimmy: well, i think it looks good on you. you know, you on occasion will post videos to twitter.
and there's something i want to ask about. let's show this video if we could. and jim can explain what's going on here. bird. >> yeah. that's a bird. it's just me kind of hanging out. trying to make friends with the beasts around me. >> jimmy: how did you get the bird to fly in slow motion like that? [ laughter ] >> i stayed there for two weeks. now we're really getting close. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: almost magical. >> i fancy myself kind of a francis of assisi type. you know? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. you know? i did "ace ventura: pet detective." and ever since then -- [ cheers and applause ] i've had this kind of connection to the animal world. >> jimmy: you have as a result of those movies. >> but the interesting thing is people don't think about this. that looks lovely. and it was a beautiful thing.
but then i started scratching a lot. and i couldn't sleep at night. i was itching everywhere and stuff. and i started doing some research, and i realized that birds are just infested with mites. [ laughter ] and i had invited them into my home. they were everywhere. they were pooping on everything. they were on my shoulder. and i was covered from head to foot with mites. they're not what you think they are. birds. birds have an edge. birds have an edge. they come with baggage, man. >> jimmy: they're little dinosaurs. >> when you hear them singing songs in the trees. they're not singing songs. they're saying, "it's my tree! this is my tree! >> jimmy: they're plotting against you. >> don't come near this tree! i'll peck your eyes out if you come near the tree!" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: is it possible they saw the beard as a nest where they wanted to raise their young? [ applause ] by the way, you're probably attached to it. we do have a cruiseship barber here tonight. [ cheers and applause ]
this guy is the best. >> have you cut hair like this? you cut it like this, man. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he only lost 14 customers last year. >> overboard? >> jimmy: no, shaving. well, jim carrey is here with us. he's got a show. "i'm dying up here." be right back, more after this. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [laughter] we all drive... some just for the fun of it. ♪
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so what do you think of the place? >> i think we're staying in the middle of a [ bleep ] closet. >> you can't put a bed in here much less two. >> you can fit two sleeping bags here plus you have access to a full kitchen, shower, toilet, all semi-functional. >> we'll take it. >> are you [ bleep ] serious?
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's jim carrey's new show "i'm dying up here." it's on showtime premiering june 4th. this is -- you made a show about a subject matter that's so rich. and personally something i love hearing about. >> yeah, absolutely. >> it's not so loosely based on the comedy store and the '70s and the comedians. you were one of those -- >> it's a fictitious history. >> jimmy: you actually lived in a closet at one time. >> i did. and that's the wonderful michael angarano and clark duke doing a couple of characters that come out from boston, comics that come out from boston to make it in hollywood. hollywood, brotha. and there's little pieces of me through the show. that line "hollywood brotha" comes from a drug dealer that used to hang at the comedy store. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> and every time you walked up to him and say how are you doing, man? he'd go "hollywood, brotha." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: which can be taken either way. >> right. but it's an incredible time in history that i got to live. >> jimmy: do you look back on it fondly, that time?
>> absolutely. to me it's like the big bang of comedy. it followed nixon and watergate and the impeachment. all that stuff that was happening back then. not unlike today that's giving birth to amazing people, comics who have voices like yourself. and john oliver and all the wonderful comics. bill maher. and there was a need, you know, to tell the truth. and cut through the baloney. and so it created this phenomenon called the comedy clubs. and it was literally the big bang of comedy. >> jimmy: who are the guys you remember? and women. comedians that you remember seeing there. >> elaine boozler. >> jimmy: getting to talk with and admiring. >> i was standing some nights by myself with richard pryor in the parking lot. >> jimmy: wow. [ applause ] >> i can't believe i'm standing with richard pryor. and he would tell me inside stuff. you know, we were passing a joint one night.
and he said "careful with that. i don't remember 40 years of my life." >> jimmy: did that actually -- was he joking? >> no, he wasn't joking. he wasn't joking. but he loved me and he was so sweet to me. i really got close to him for a while. and he was so encouraging. such an amazing person. >> jimmy: what a place. what a time. >> yeah. you'd watch him go up and work out some stuff. you know. and robin williams and eddie murphy and all these incredible -- [ cheers and applause ] -- incredible comics. it was a beautiful experience. >> jimmy: i know you do a lot of painting now. do you feel like that's your primary creative outlet now? >> it is one of them. it's one of them. yeah. i mean, i definitely -- i brought a few. >> jimmy: we have a few of the paintings. these are -- these are almost actual size as we're showing them. [ cheers and applause ] >> this is a piece called "hooray we're all broken." it represents all the different
modes of life and all the different people and all the different things we go through. but it's important to remember especially for me i would never show up anywhere if i didn't understand everyone was broken in some way. you know? [ applause ] because then i would think i was different. >> jimmy: let's go to the next one. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's me, right? >> that's you. [ laughter ] that's you inside, jimmy. that's you inside. the child inside. and no, this is the baby. and basically, it represents form coming out of energy is what i believe all of us are. we're just conscious awareness dancing with itself for no other reason than to stay amused. >> jimmy: we have one more. >> this is called "she's the bomb." >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] >> you can take that as you want. [ laughter ] women can be -- >> jimmy: did that start with the woman's face or did it start with the explosion?
>> it started with the explosion. but it's a weird thing when i paint. i sometimes don't know what i'm painting till about a year later in therapy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, really? that's a big one to bring into your therapist's office. jim carrey is here. his show is "i'm dying up here" sunday on showtime. thanks, jim. we'll be right back with rachel the bachelorette! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ -what? -we gotta go. -where? -san francisco. -when? -friday. we gotta go. [ tires screech ] any airline. any hotel. any time. go where you want, when you want with no blackout dates. [ muffled music coming from club. "blue monday" by new order. cheers. ] [ music and cheers get louder ] the travel rewards credit card from bank of america. it's travel, better connected. the travel rewards credit card from bank of america.
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>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. bush is outside and ready to go. earlier tonight our next guest began a quest to find a man among a group that included two blakes, a kenny, a kenneth, a man carrying a mannequin he calls his son and a terrible person named lucas. it will be a long journey indeed. watch season 13 of "the bachelorette" mondays here on abc. please welcome rachel lindsay. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ welcome. you look great. we've had enough standing. you can sit. relax. >> thank you. >> jimmy: hey, by the way, first i want to say congratulations. you announced that you are engaged to be married. >> i am. [ cheers and applause ]
>> jimmy: you announced this before the first episode even aired. are you engaged to someone on the show or is this a completely separate thing? >> good question. on the show. >> jimmy: on the show. >> someone on the show. >> jimmy: fascinating. >> yes. >> jimmy: has anyone ever announced this before the show started? >> no, no. but we joke and say this is a season of firsts. and i think they were like, you know what, you're so excited, you're glowing, just do it. >> jimmy: you think so? >> yeah. >> jimmy: or did something happen where you were forced to reveal it because it was going to get out somehow, maybe it will get out of my mouth right now, because i will predict who it is you're going to pick. >> i can't wait. >> jimmy: i'm very good -- i should say my wife is very good and she tells me. >> i heard that. >> jimmy: she's very skilled in this department. but we'll get to that in a minute. so were you with this person to whom you're engaged, when was the last time you saw him? >> at the proposal. >> jimmy: that was the last time. >> we had a couple of days together. >> jimmy: and then what happened? >> and then we went our separate ways. >> jimmy: you haven't seen him in person since then? >> no.
>> jimmy: how many months was that? >> we just finished filming like ten days ago. >> jimmy: oh, you just finished filming. okay. my whole time thing is -- >> that's okay. >> jimmy: so you haven't had a chance to reconnection and break up and be on the cover of "us weekly" or any of those things? [ laughter ] >> i don't plan on a break-up. >> jimmy: you're a lawyer. civil defense attorney. is that correct? >> yes. [ cheers and applause ] oh, thank you. >> jimmy: what do you know. first time a lawyer has ever gotten applause in any situation. [ laughter ] when you go to your office and you have to tell your boss and your clients that you're going to be away dating for a while, how did they take that news? >> they're so supportive. >> jimmy: they are? >> literally my boss said go, rachel, go out there and find love. and i said thanks, i will. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's nice. >> yeah. but he also said you better come back. >> jimmy: when do you come back? >> next week. >> jimmy: and will it be hard to keep it a secret when you get there in an office full of lawyers? >> no. i feel like i'm groomed for this. >> jimmy: what if a judge calls
you into his chambers and says i want to know who you picked. will you reveal it then? >> again, you know, my dad is a judge. so i'm groomed for this. >> jimmy: i see. >> yeah. >> jimmy: have you told your dad? >> i have told my dad. >> jimmy: so it's okay to tell your family. >> yes. >> jimmy: all right. interesting. the way the rules are. and are you worried at all about any member of your family yammering and revealing the secret? >> my sister. >> jimmy: your sister is the weak link in the family? >> she's the weakest link. >> jimmy: she's the leaky faucet. >> she'll kill me for saying that. >> jimmy: you brought your dog to the mansion. >> i did. >> jimmy: was that a condition of doing this? did you say i would like to bring my dog? >> he demanded it. >> jimmy: he demanded it. >> yes. that's my dog child. and he said whoever's going to be his newest daddy if i pick one, he needed to be a part of it. >> jimmy: will he sniff the guys and decide -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: so he gave them all the sniff test and one of them passed. what about the waboom guy?
is that what he said, waboom? [ laughter ] did your dog attack him? please tell me yes. [ laughter ] >> copper wasn't there for the waboom with lucas. >> jimmy: oh, interesting. so that means either the dog came late or he left early or maybe even both. >> copper wasn't there for every single episode. so that's why. >> jimmy: what does copper have to do? he's a dog. >> he's a diva. >> jimmy: we're going to take a break. when we come back from the break, a couple of things are going to happen. number one, i'm going to give you a lie detector test. >> oh, god. >> jimmy: that's right. and you're under oath. and number two, i'm going to reveal who rachel's top three are and who she will likely become engaged to. [ cheers and applause ] >> i can't wait. >> jimmy: rachel is here. we will be right back after this. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> waaaaa-waaaaaa-boom! yes! >> jimmy: what the -- [ cheers and applause ] how bad were the other guys if lucas got the rose? >> i said i wanted to be entertained the first night. and as you can see, he did that. >> jimmy: yeah. >> to the fullest. >> jimmy: okay. >> i was curious to see what lucas was about, not the waboom. >> jimmy: the waboom was annoying. you were not put off by waboom? >> a little bit. >> jimmy: all right. it's time for the lie detector test. this is a serious piece of technology we ordered from amazon or something here. what you have to do is i'm going to ask you a question and then you answer and then you will press that and we will see if you are indeed telling the truth.
all right? again, you are under oath. okay? first question, is your name rachel lindsay? whoa. we're off to a bad start. [ laughter ] i just need to get kind of a level on this thing. next question, are you engaged? >> yes. >> jimmy: okay. you are engaged. we're on the right track. did you keep waboom around because the producers asked you to because they need one lunatic in the house at all times? [ laughter ] >> no. because there's more than one. >> jimmy: oh, there is? okay. that is true. did you do anything on the show that could potentially get you disbarred? >> no. >> jimmy: okay. this could be -- oh, wow. [ applause ] do you believe the tickle monster should be behind bars? [ laughter ] >> no. >> jimmy: no. all right.
[ applause ] yeah. the rest of it seems pointless. it's time for me to pick your final three. >> i can't wait. >> jimmy: keep in mind we're going to be looking for your reactions here. and again, this is something my wife and one of our producers aaron thought long and hard about and i just stepped in and concurred. okay? all right. your first -- can we get a drum roll, please? [ drum roll ] first, eric. eric is a personal trainer. but that's okay since he's not the one you're going to marry anyway. you seemed really into him during the premiere episode. he seemed sweet and levelheaded. eric will make it to the final three. [ cheers and applause ] [ laughter ] next! brian. brian got the first impression rose. you french-kissed him. >> oh, god.
>> jimmy: he's a chiropractor. so he's almost like a real doctor but not exactly. [ laughter ] he's colombian. that's exciting. he hablas espanol. brian will be in the final two. [ cheers and applause ] and finally. his name is peter. you gave him a look when he got out of the limo. the kind of look women get on their face when they see a pair of shoes they absolutely love and want to have. [ laughter ] he's a business owner, which concerns me. you both have gaps in the front of your teeth. [ laughter ] which will make for adorable babies. he gave you chocolate. you said you didn't like chocolate. he said he would throw that chocolate in the fire. strong move. i believe that you are currently engaged to peter! true or false? [ cheers and applause ]
all right. well, there's no cracking you. but i hope it works out. they never work out. [ laughter ] >> well, i would love to be the first. i would love to prove you wrong. >> jimmy: it is as you said a season of firsts. and who knows? [ cheers and applause ] peter is the guy? rachel, everybody. "the bachelorette." monday nights on abc. we'll be right back with bush! >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. tv. is. killer. but the way we watch it is not.
so, let's do something else. like what? like, watch tv wherever. what's that supposed to mean? it means, anywhere. in a car? yep. oof. but not like that. like this. oooh, family boat trip! yeah. and check this, record as many shows as you want. what? what? i just got chills. i know! tv, like, made for us. finally! finally. yeah. finally. ♪ wait, that's way cheaper than cable.
>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: thanks to jim carrey. thanks to rachel the bachelorette. apologies to matt damon. we did run out of time for him. "nightline" is next. but first, this is their album, "black and white rainbows." here with the song "mad love," bush! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
♪ i was saving you from droung ♪ you were silent is a rain cloud ♪ ♪ the ceiling was imploding the walls were closing in ♪ ♪ i was feeling a prisoner i was running so fast i was speeding through the red lights speeding past ♪ ♪ still got mad love for you baby still got mad love for you baby ♪ ♪ every day you find ways to drive me crazy ♪ ♪ still got mad love for you baby still got mad love for you baby ♪
♪ every day you find ways to drive me crazy ♪ ♪ oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh ♪ so restless we're waiting you've been gone so long ♪ ♪ i fell in your slipstream fell in my arms ♪ ♪ and i want you to dance now to dance just for me it's all out of focus you make me so free ♪ ♪ still got mad love for you baby still got mad love for you
baby ♪ ♪ every day you find ways to drive me crazy ♪ ♪ still got mad love for you baby still got mad love for you baby ♪ ♪ every day you find ways to drive me crazy ♪ ♪ oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh ♪ still got mad love for you baby still got mad love for you baby ♪ ♪ every day you find ways to drive me crazy ♪ ♪ still got mad love for you baby still got mad love for you baby ♪
this is a special edition of "nightline." inside the pulse nightclub terror. tonight, newly released body cam footage from the pulse nightclub. police moving in on the deadliest mass shooting in american history. >> show me your hands! show us your hands! >> dramatic recordings with the shooter. >> you're speaking with the person who pledged his allegiance to the islamic state. >> new details of the harrowing rescues. >> let's go, get them out! >> exclusive interviews with officers who risked everything to put a stop to evil that night. >> as i look to my right i see two of our officers start shooting down a hallway. >> untold stories of the moment terror struck in orlando. this special edition of "nightline" will be right back.