tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC November 10, 2016 11:35pm-12:38am EST
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good food, good drink. and good women. now, we consider klingon women our partners in battle. they are the mothers of our children. and a lot of fu. true. ( chuckling ) why does he keep staring at us? i don't think it's us he's staring at. i think it's you. dax: the vorta probably consider ththfounders gods just like the jem'hadar do. i am not a founder. well, you're a changeling. that's close enough. to them. i wonder what would happen if you went over there and ordered him to stand on his head. ( laughing )
it's time. ( groans ) very well. prepare six vials. unlock. first, omet'iklan can you vouch for the loyalty of your men? we pledge our loyalty to the founders from now until death. then receive this reward from the founders. may it keep you strong. i guesesthat's one way to assure loyalty. loyalty bought at such a price is no loyalty at all.
come with me. it is time to resume our battle drills. in a minute. i'm ready now. well, i'm not. they stuff themselves with food bubuhave no appetite for battle. when the time comes, you will find us more than ready. ready to flee at the first sign of danger. let's go. i've always wanted to kill a klingon. that's enough! the next one who throws a punch will have to answer to me!
i did. and i. you... again. you knew my orders. and i defied them. i deserve punishment. and you shall l ve it. why are you waiting? kill him and be done withtht. mr. worf... when not on duty, you are confined to quarters for the remainder of this mission. yes, sir. all right, let's break this up. get back to your stations or to your quarters. either way, i want this room cleared. now!
a dead man can't learn from his mistakes. i don't get the same joy out of killing a ayou do. you think i enjoyed it? toman'torax was my second. he sererd under me three years. i valued him. you have a... funny way of showing it. i did what had to be done-- what any first would do. above my personal feelings. any soldier who cannot follow orders is a danger to his unit... and must be eliminated. mr. worf is not a danger to my command. but if i eliminate him for a simple breach of discipline then i would be. my men would stop trusting me
i have to admit i find it somewhat disturbing seeing you workininfor these... federation people... letting them order you around. you are a founder. you should be the one giving the orders to them to the jem'hadar ororven me. so... if i order you to leave me alone you will? of course. but before you do please, hear what i have to say. your people want you to come home, odo. no matter what differences you may have with them no matter what mistakes you may have made they still love you. well, maybe they do... and you're not very good at it but i don't love them. .
commander? for keiko? it's my 11th goodbye message since we've been married. i'm averaging almost two a year. does she know you do this? what would i say to her? "you know, honey "every time i'm about to go into battle "i record a message for you and molly telling you how much i love you, just in case." was sweet. it'd probably scare the hell out of her. to be honest, it scares the hell out of me. every time i record one of these, i think "this is it. this is s e one they're going to end up hearing." it'll never happen. what makes you say that? because when you've lived eight lifetimes you develop certain instincts.
g to livand die in b ed surrounded by family and friends. do you really believe that? do you? i'd like to. that's all that matters. ( chuckles ) well, just to be on the safe side maybe you'd better enter this in the ship's log anyway. i'll put it right alongside my message to my mother. you record these too? doesn't everyone? well, it looks like the upgraded reactant injectors are working better than we thought. captain. mr. worf. battle drills ended ten minutes ago. you should be in your r arters. i'm on my way. it looks like you got a little lost.
it has come to my attention that first omet'iklan has threatened to kill you. i didn't know that was public knowledge. you told commander dax. well, that explains it. she is concerned about you and for good reason. as your executive officer i recommend you remain on the ship during the away mission. that way, omet'iklan will have no opportunity to carry out his threat. i appreciate the concern, but do you really think i'm going to follow that recommendation? no, sir, i do not. but t hope you will take some advice. do not turn your back on him. i won't. good. i also want you to know if somehow he does carry out his threat... he will not live to boast about it.
the first joint operation between the federation and the dominion. e how it turns out. prepare to transport. wait. i am first omet'iklan. and i am dead. as of this moment we are all dead. we go into battle... to reclaim our lives. this we do gladly remember-- victory is life. all: victory is life. such delightful people. i am chief miles edward o'brien. i'm very much alive and i intend to stay that way. amen.
go ahead. we'l'lhold them off. keep moving. virak'kara, are you still there?! for a little while longer. don't worry! you'll make honored elder. i think we have waited long enough. ( all grunt ) you're sure the explosives won't be affected by the gateway? the primary detonator might not work but there's a chemical backup
what about dax and the others? worf: here, captain. ( explosion ) so much for the gateway. our weapons are working again. the fiant's sensors registered a powerful explosion in the vicinity of the gateway. i trust your mission was a success? well done, captain. you've all doneneicely. now, if you don't mind i'd like to inspect the wreckage. that was f f questioning... our loyalty. i think there's been enough killing
my men and i will remain here. there are still disloyal jem'hadar on this planet. they must be hunted down and eliminated. good luck. you fought well. but the next time we meet... we'll be enemies. i'll keep that in mind. well, i don't know about the rest of you but i'd like to get out of here. sisko to defiant. begin transport.
man: citizens of earth, your destiny is in my hands. those of you who acquiesce to my demands will be treated fairly. oppose me, and you face a dire fate indeed as my slaves in the mines of mercury. you have one hour. you'll never get away with this. oh, but i shall. your once-proud country will fall to its knees. how ironic that i am using your rocket ship to lead my space force into battle. you're wrong, chaotica. before you came on board someone pushed the self-destruct button. in three minutes, we'll all be dead. no! ( door opens )
spaceman first class, protector of earth scourge of intergalactic evil... at your service. but i saw you fall into the fiery mouth a little lav of that volcano. a to stop captain proton. now, i want you to call off your invasion and give me back my rocket ship. there is one force in t ts universe that even you cannot defeat. the same to you. doc. mr. paris. i should have known it was you monopolizing the holodeck. who is this insolent fool? uh, he's one of our men. computer, adjust the doctor's spectrtr frequency. i have no interest in your frivolous fantasasy. i'm here to rehearse a duet from don carlo enough! robot, attack. ( screams )
start with him. computer, freeze program. doc, this is the final chapter-- satan's robot conquers the world. we can't'ttop now. does the phrase "to be continued" mean anything to you? your opera can wait. this program is a waste of photonic energy. oh, really? take a look around you. this is how thth20th century saw the future. we are studying sociology. perhaps you can teach a course at starfleet academy-- "satan's robot: an historical overview." ( alarm blaring ) bridge to o lodeck one. what's going on down there? kim: oh, nothing, commander. just a little power surge. says here the hologrid just blew out. paris: we're fixing it now, sir. well, make it quick. the last thing we need is a broken holodeck. seven, i want good news. that's an order. then i must disobey. i have no good news to report.
. nothing? nothing. why can't we see any stars beyond that? there are heavy concentrations of theta-radiation. it is occluding our sensors. any other shshs out there? none. we are alone. every sailor's nightmare. commander? it's like being becalmed in the middle of the ocean. if it weren't for sensors we wouldn't even know we were at warp. we've onlylyeen crossing this expanse for two months and we're already feeling the strain. r two years? we will adapt. easier said than done. shall i inform the captain of my findings? no.
first officer's log, stardate 52081.2. it's been 53 days since we entered this desolate region. ifife want to continue our course toward home we have no choice bubuto cross it. we won't have an opportunity to take on fresh supplies or fuel so i've ordered all departments to create an energy reserve. we're using power cells to stockpile deuterium. in some ways, this is the most- knowing each day will be just like the last. torres: this won't be much of a briefing. there's nothing new to report. humor me. all right. let's see. warp core's at peak efficiency just like last week and the week before that. and my engineering staff is going stir-crazy. thanks. ensign? nada.
within normal parameters. anything new on sensors? i detected a sudden increase of theta-radiation in the vicinity. source? unknown. could be worth a look. finally, some excitement-- radiation. next piece of business. crew morale: deteriorating... obviously. i have a f f suggestions that might boost people's spirits. please. i myself wouldn't t nd squeezing in a little tactical training. noted. neelix: and the holodecks have been in high demand. i was thinking... we could install a few emitters in cargo bay two-- turn it into a third holodeck. hear, hear. chokotay: see totot, harry. one other item, sir. point of, uh, concern among some of the crew. it's... well, it's the captain.
what's your point? people take comfort in talking to her. when they see that the captain's happy, they're happy. rumor has it she never leaves her quarters. captain's privilege. she'll come to the bridge if and when she's needed. spspe us the protocol. it's pretty odd, you've got to admit it. it's her choice. she can run this ship from wherever the hell she wants to. understood? yeah. sure. ( sighs ) we're all feeling the pressure, including me. listen, maybe we've got the wrong attitude. let's think of this as a two-year vacation. dismissed. that's a great idea, harry. wow, harry. you're a real genius. how do you come up with these brilliant ideas?
that's because you always fall for it. ( sighing ): i feel like we've played this matat a hundred times. derata is a game of subtlety. too subtle for me. hmm. i'll bet. what's that supposed to mean? well, if it doesn't involve klingon pain sticks... good night. thereryou go. just when i'm winning. who's predictable? you don't want to start a fight with me now-- not at 3:00 a.m. 3:00 in the morning, 4:00 in the afternoon-- what's the difference? you're angng 24 hours a day. everything is a joke to you. good evening... or should i say good morning? i guess you couldn't sleep, either. why sleep when we're having so much fun? he's joking, neelix. we'r'rall supposed to laugh. i certainly am laughing on the inside... smiling, anyway. let's start a new game. cards? a little snack? no. i have a better idea:
i can start one, you can start one... please... i am really tired of these games. well, thenendon't play them. ( shouts ): stop! you are you are susuosed to be setting an example for the rest... ( gasping ): the rest of the crew. ( hyperventilating ) neelix? i can't breathe. paris to sick bay. some morale officer i turned out to be. i'veveiven you a mild sedative. late and alleviate some of your anxiety. anxiety? anxiety's what i feel when i burn a pot roast. this... this is more like... dizziness? nausea? unspeakable dread? yes. nihiliphobia: the fear of nothingness or in layman's terms, the fear of... nothingness. if it's any consolation, i can relate to it. ter oblivion i go into a void every time i'm deactivated.
the existential horror of it all... you're not helping, doctor. sorry. pe s my point is, you'll get used to it. o. ( door opens ) seven: commander... am i disturbing you? no. is the astrometrics lab designated for recreational use? i've come here to meditate. needless to say, the view from my quarters has been less than stellar lately. astronomical phenomenon help you to focus your mind. yes. i imagine that each star represents a single thought. meditation-- it rejuvenates you? indeed it does. i suggest you try borg regeneration. it's much more efficient. a simple cortical implant would be requirered. another time, perhaps. ( beeping ) what is it?
dangerously high levels. source? unknown. it's probably nothing, just... background theta-radiation. but it could mean there's someone nearby. janeway: distance? approximately 25 light-years. it's a long shot, but alter course. yes, ma'am. if that's all, commander... actually, i'd like to make a request. i've been saving up my holodeck rations three full hours coming. any chance i might persuade you to join me for a few rounds of velocity? it'll help clear your mind. my mind is perfectly clear. and what if i told you i'm not leaving until you join me? i'd say, "have a seat, it'll be a while." then i'll be blunt. you've picked a bad time to isolate yourself from the crew. this ship needs s captain, especially now.
i'm not sure i understand it myself. it started when we entered this-- what does the crew call it? the void. charming. ( claps hands ) oh, what i wouldn't give for a few borg cubes about now-- anything for a little distractionon. strange as it sounds, i almost long for the days when we were under constata attack. no time to stop and think about how we got stranded in the delta quadrant. how did we end up here, chakotay? answer me. we were faced with a difficult chchce. we had the means to get home but using it would have putt k so we decided to stay. no... no, no. i decided to stay. i made that choice for everyone. we're alive and well
our mission's been a success. very same words i've been telling myself for the past four years. but then we hit this void and i started to realize how empty those words sound. kathryn... i made an error in judgment, chakotay. it was shortsighted and it was selfish and now all of us are paying for my mistake. so if you don't mind, commander, i'll pass on that little game and i'll leave shipboard morale in your capable hands. if the crew asks for me tell them the captain sends her regards.
to foil captain proton. my designation? ah, right. you're constancncgoodheart. you're... my secretary. secretary? yeah. you tag along on all the missions. now, i want you to keep the robot occupied while i save earth. computer, run program. citizen of earth, surrender. i am borg. ( voice slows down ): surrender... may i leave now? ( groaning ): come on, seven. give it a chance. the galaxy's at stake. ( continues playing concerto ) we've dropped out of warp. we're losing power. switch to auxiliary.
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ower, auxiliary... independent subsystems are operational-- environmental controls, holodecks... reroute power from this holodedeck to the emergency relays. yes, ma'am. no luck. the hololoid is frozen. ixix don't mind me. there's been a power loss. nothing to worry about. who's worried? comemen. take deep breaths-- nice and slow. thatat it. ( beeping ) bingo! we've got partial sensors. i found the cause of our power drain.
that's about all i can tell you. on screen. do we have the power to launch a proton torpedo? maybe one. why? on our predicament. i'm reconfiguring the torpedo to emimia sustained polyluminous burst. a "warp flare." precisely. i need something to pry open this hatch. ( yells ) computer, disengage safety protocols! i saw something!
i'm telling you, i saw something. i may be nihiliphobic but my eyes work just fine. ( breathing nearby ) i can hear breathing. follow me. yes, ma'am. torpedo reconfigured. away. i can barely see the injector ports. how about a little light over here? we can do better than that. this power cell shouldlde enough to get emergency power back on line. up here!
emergency power just came back. we've got tactical. raising shields. torres::the wars on line. janeway to bridge. report. tuvok: the dampening field has been blocked, captain. we are surrounded by three alien vessels. 17 intruders are on board. the ships aren't responding to hails. we do have weapons on line. tuvok, target the ship off our r rt bow. fire a few warning shots. tuvok: shields down to 64%. do we have propulsion? not yet. he was attacked by an intruder. these burns are severe. i disabled the alien. it may still be alive. bring it to sick bay. shields are down. they're reinitializing the dampening field. we're losing power.
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the bio-filters are detecting high levels of theta-radiation. compensate. welcome aboard. i'm afraid we'll have to talk here. you appear to be leaking. yes, yes. my isolation suit. don't be alarmed. emck. controller emck malon export vessel, eleventh gradient. it's a pleasure to meet you and a relief... i'd advise you to turn around immediately. there are more of those creatures ahead-- thousands of vessels. they are almost impossible to detect. you won't survive another attack. we can't go back. we're crcrsing this expanse to reach our home. mmm. then, uh... it appears you'll be coming with me. what do you mean? there's a spatial vortex
e of the expanse. we've been using it for years. that would get us out of the void and cut two years off our journey home. well, thank you again. i'm curious, mr. emck. what are you doing here-- besides rescuing starships in distress? ah. i'm on a... transport mission. my sensors tell me that one of the creatures is still aboard your ship. it was injured during the attack. our doctor's treating it. why? give me the creature and i'll take you to the vortex. well, my apologies, mr. emck but i'd like to know what's going on here. are you at war with these beings? none of your concern. your vessel seems to be leaking large amounts of theta-radiation. what kind of transport mission are you on exactly? my ship will depart in two hours. cooperate or stay behind. i won't be coming to your rescue
i'm finished here. i think it's time we heard the other side o othe story. watch your step. i've had to lower the lights. my patient is extremely photosensitive. that could explain why they dampened our power. my feelings exactly. this life-form mayaye indigenous to the void. his physiology has evolved to survive in complete darkness. his condition? minor injuries-- phaser wounds to the chest and neck-- but that's the least of his problems. he's dying, captain. every organ is degrading at the cellular level. janeway: theta-radiation poisoning. doctor: the final stages. my guess is he's been exposed to it over a long period. there's nothing i can do.
i'm kathryn janeway, captain of this vessel. you are allies with the malon. no. we're simply trying to cross this region. we never met the malon before today. they will want me. well, i have no intention of giving you to them. you're not a captive here. ( shivering grunt ) doctor. are you at war with the malon? their ships are poison. the theta-radiation. they're killing us. you? nothing. this will help alleviate the pain. i don't understand. we were ignorant. we attacked you. forgive us. of course, but i need to understandn. you say the malon are killing your people but there must be a reason. they're e isoning our space. we don't know why. ( gasping for breath ) he's in respiratory distress.
w how to treat him. i will show you how. i need a workstation. route it to the helm. if you enter the coordinates my pilot will set a course. i am grateful. take the bridge. i'll stay here. we still don't have a defense against their dampening field. if they decide to attack again... i'm confident thth won't. finally something to put in my logbook. tuvok. i need your advice. a first. look, i realize we're not exactly beststriends. from day one, we've kept each other at arm's length but i've always respected your judgment and right now, i could use a little vulcan clarity. proceed. it's the captain. as you may have noticed, she's isolated herself from the crew. she believes that she made an error in judgment four years ago--
in the delta quadrant. she told you? no. i've been observing her behavior for the past four years. guilt has been her constant companion. you've known her longer than anyone. have you ever seen her like this? only once. it was during her first year as a commander on the uss billings. she sent an away team to survey a volcanic moon. their shuttle was damaged by a magma eruption and three crew members were severely injured. the next day, she returned to the moon, alone to complete the survey. she wanted the crew to know that their suffering had not been in vain. she could have been killed. seeking redemption. precisely. captain janeway's methods are unorthodox. it is her strength as a leader s a klingo but, unfortunately, it is also her greatest weakness. n. to put it mildly. if she tries something like that again
we're at the coordinates. all stop. shields up. tuvok. nothing on sensors. bridge to captain. we've arrived. stand by. they're here, but i must tell them you are a friend. your communications system? m picking up photonic surges. they're all around us. captain, we've got company-- eight ships. 12 more approaching. let's run a full bio-scan. we have lived here for millions of years undisturbed until the malon came. captain, every one of them appears to be suffering from theta-radiation exposure. we tell them they are killing us.