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20090604
20170921
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DATE
2015 9
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Search Results 0 to 8 of about 9
Comedy Central
Apr 8, 2015 12:01am PDT
china. on monday a giant panda named lu lu set the record for panda sex by sticking it to zhen zhen for seven minutes and 45 seconds jealous ladies, and continuing this great ball of china just 24 hours later lu lu gave a potent panda deep dicking to another lady bear, xi mei, for a whopping 18 minutes and three seconds. she got two timed by this pussy thirsty (bleep) bear. so comedians as the guilty philandering panda i would like you to apologize to synergy your first panda boo. we will get your answers right a after this when we come back with more @midnight. what do you think? when i first sit in the seat it makes me think of a bmw. i feel like i'm in a lexus. you would think that this was a brand new audi. it's like a luxury car. feels kind of like an infinity. very similar to a range rover. this is pretty high tech. yeah it is. it reminds me of a mercedes. ♪ this is chevy? laughing i have a new appreciation for chevy. they thought about me. i could totally rock this. this thing feels pretty boss. it looks kind of dope. that's pretty cool. this is the jam. pretty bomb dude. m
Comedy Central
Mar 12, 2015 2:07am PDT
] you guys are going to be very excited to hear about this. china has its first prison themed restaurant no it is not ruby tuesday, it is called prison feng yun decorated are metal bars and chains to gives the diners a chance of the prison experience so they are less likely to commit crimes and spending time with mcgruff the crime dog, you don't know who that is, that's right. >> and comedians i am sure you all served time at one point or another so i would like you to tell me tonight specials at the chinese prison sphrawnt and get your answers after the break when we return to @midnight. ♪ ♪ schick xtreme3. 3 flexible blades... ...that adapt to any contour... ...for extreme comfort. schick xtreme3. try xtreme3 ultimate. more glide, better comfort. free your skin. can a truck change how people feel about a guy? we talked to real people, not actors. we showed them two pictures of the same guy in the same location. the only difference... the vehicle behind him. if this guy could grow facial hair what would he grow? just a soul patch. the truck guy. mutton chops. show me how
Comedy Central
Apr 16, 2015 2:05am PDT
reflection and mourning. why can't funerals be like in rural china where the new trend is to hire memorial strippers. yeah, that's right. she puts the jizz in eulogize. all dollars go to the ferry man to take grandpa across the river. i don't know what is more disrespectful, stripping at a funeral or instagramming strippers at a funeral. i would like you to give me a eulogy as a sleazing strip club d.j. i'll fet your answers when we come back with more "@midnight." ( cheers and ( cheers and applause ). >> chris: welcome back to "@midnight." before the break, the new chinese fad of hiring strippers for funerals and i asked you to give a eulogy areav sleazy strip club d.j. >> coming up next, the winner of our wet coffin contest. all right! there's a dead guy in here. >> chris: fahim. >> she was a hottie with a body. now she's just a body, a cold body, just like our $5 bucket of ice cold beer. ( cheers and applause ) >> he was a good man. he loved his family. ( cheers and applause ). >> chris: 1,000 500 250 as we jump to the next game "coachella f.a.q." ( cheers and applause ) fridays is the
Comedy Central
Jun 12, 2015 2:13am PDT
case. over in china the florida of asia a man is suing actress zhao wei star of the hit show tiger million which i really wish was about a mom who is also a tiger but i'm not sure it is. the plaintiff sis the actress was staring at him too intensely through the tv shett causing him quote spiritual damage. spiritual damage, i shall be the judge of spiritual damage. i want you to stare at our @midnight viewers so intensely through their tv that we can hear their thoughts as you cause them spiritual damage. we'll get your answers after the break and be rate back with more @midnight new lipton sparkling iced tea. ♪ refreshing tea infused with light, crisp, tiny bubbles. for a taste that lifts you up. ♪ ♪ schick xtreme3. 3 flexible blades... ...that adapt to any contour... ...for extreme comfort. schick xtreme3. try xtreme3 ultimate. more glide, better comfort. free your skin. ♪ ♪ ♪ get excited for the 1989 world tour with exclusive behind the scenes footage all of taylor swift's music videos interviews, and more. xfinity is the destination for all things taylor swift. . >>
Comedy Central
Mar 12, 2015 12:01am PDT
be very excited to hear about this. china has its first prison themed restaurant no it is not ruby tuesday, it is called prison feng yun decorated are metal bars and chains to gives the diners a chance of the prison experience so they are less likely to commit crimes and spending time with mcgruff the crime dog, you don't know who that is, that's right. >> and comedians i am sure you all served time at one point or another so i would like you to tell me tonight specials at the chinese prison sphrawnt and get your answers after the break when we return to @midnight. apples are good. as strongbow hard cider, better. but strongbow over ice is the best. enjoying strongbow over ice with your slow motion horse, the bestest. ♪ strongbow, world's number one hard cider. yeah we'ren"y!q00tion nexmoh, my famúvy churns yough@yl rts of úata. well, now we havmo4tprhaxr valuans with rollover data h!pazhe data pu n't use p4is@8mo zh rolls hy to p4xtp@ b soundsxrat. but at's yr pó i don't think i have @qanesú@ búprd80ll, zh? look,you@8@qntc6e in othis, i want piece of the aio ohcçl you get
Comedy Central
Apr 8, 2015 2:05am PDT
heating up in the sichuan giant panda research center in china. on monday a giant panda named lu lu set the record for panda sex by sticking it to zhen zhen for seven minutes and 45 seconds jealous ladies, and continuing this great ball of china just 24 hours later lu lu gave a potent panda deep dicking to another lady bear, xi mei, for a whopping 18 minutes and three seconds. she got two timed by this pussy thirsty (bleep) bear. so comedians as the guilty philandering panda i would like you to apologize to synergy your first panda boo. we will get your answers right a after this when we come back with more @midnight. just think about what am i doing right now? smile. [ laugh ] smile? uh huh. [ ping sound of text message ] this is so easy. [ crash ] [ sirens ] [ police officer ] nobody likes to be stopped by the police. but if i'd seen her texting while driving and given her a ticket. it just might have saved her life. ♪ ♪ schick xtreme3. 3 flexible blades... ...that adapt to any contour... ...for extreme comfort. schick xtreme3. try xtreme3 ultimate. more glide, better comfort. fre
Comedy Central
Apr 16, 2015 12:01am PDT
like in rural china where the new trend is to hire memorial strippers. yeah, that's right. she puts the jizz in eulogize. all dollars go to the ferry man to take grandpa across the river. i don't know what is more disrespectful, stripping at a funeral or instagramming strippers at a funeral. i would like you to give me a eulogy as a sleazing strip club d.j. i'll fet your answers when we come back with more "@midnight." ( cheers and [sfx: squeaking brakes] uhh you do know, the experts at midas will tell you what needs fixing now and what can wait, right? like, i dunno...brakes? >>[laughs] of course i do. one of the best things about driving is being able to stop. get up to a hundred dollars back by mail on a two-axle brake service. brakes. tires. oil. everything. [sfx: mnemonic] the switch to t-mobile is on. even verizon customers are seeing the light. t-mobile has america's fastest 4g lte network ...from the bay area to the big apple. and more data capacity per customer. need one more reason? we'll even buy out your contract. ready set switch. to the data strong network. ineken light. t
Comedy Central
May 13, 2015 12:01am PDT
playing] >> chris: yeah, man, that crazy town song is like a wild boar tearing through a china's children's clothing some. >> why is there even a clothing store? we know these asians dress them up as food. >> all of them do! >> chris: as this wild boar please write a yelp review of this mall, we will have the comedians give an answer and we will name a winner when we come back to @midnight. >> i our pizza hut big flavor dipper pizza is almost two-feet of pizza. whoa. you're gonna need a bigger car. get the new big flavor dipper pizza with four flavorful sauces and a free pepsi 2-liter with online orders. just $12.99. only at pizza hut. [speaking in german] introducing the all new chrysler 200 america's import. ♪ sometimes the present looked bright. sometimes romantic. there were tears in my eyes. and tears in my eyes. and so many little things that we learned were really the biggest things. through it all, we saved and had a retirement plan. and someone who listened and helped us along the way. because we always knew that someday the future would be the present. every someday n
Comedy Central
May 13, 2015 2:09am PDT
playing] >> chris: yeah, man, that crazy town song is like a wild boar tearing through a china's children's clothing some. >> why is there even a clothing store? we know these asians dress them up as food. >> all of them do! >> chris: as this wild boar please write a yelp review of this mall, we will have the comedians give an answer and we will name a winner when we come back to @midnight. >> i huh, fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more on car insurance. everybody knows that. well, did you know that game show hosts should only host game shows? samantha, do you take kevin as your lawfully wedded husband... ...or...would you rather have a new caaaaaar!!! say hello to the season's hottest convertible. oh, and say good-bye to samantha. geico. fifteen minutes could save you fifteen percent or more. >> chris: welcome back to @midnight. for a tuesday night or wednesday morning, depending how you pars out your game. i am going to wipe your scores clean, i will read your answers out loud, you the audience will decide the winner. before the break i showed you footage of a
Search Results 0 to 8 of about 9