tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC November 24, 2016 11:35pm-12:38am PST
thanks for joiningus. i'm cheryl jennings. jimmy kimmel is next. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live!" tonight -- lin-manuel miranda. from "dr. ken," ken jeong and albert tsai. plus music from banks. and now, stay put -- here's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice. welcome. thank you. very nice, thank you. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching. thank you for coming. thank you really for everything. for those of you who served in our armed forces, happy veterans day.
[ cheers and applause ] because of your service, because of your sacrifice, the only wars most americans will ever have to fight are on facebook. so thank you very much. speaking of facebook, did anyone in our audience get declared dead today? there was some kind of glitch in the facebook algorithm that changed a lot of people's profiles to indicate they were deceased. even mark zuckerberg, the founder of facebook, was pronounced dead. this was real. "remembering mark zuckerberg, we hope people who love mark will find comfort in the things others shared and remembered to celebrate his life." police arrested the wigglevoss twins immediately. is that really what you do when we die? are we supposed to worry about how many likes wet got? if someone likes when it you die, is that a good thing? my assistant max was declared dead today. i almost had to pick up a whole pot of coffee and pour it into a cup myself. anyway. what a perfect end to a perfect
week. president-elect trump was in washington, d.c. yesterday. he met with president obama. his wife met with michelle obama. and at the end of the day last night, after his full day at the white house, he tweeted this. he tweeted a fantastic day in d.c., met with president obama for the first time, really good meeting, great chemistry, melania liked mrs. o. a lot. is it just me or does that read exactly like a yelp review? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] great white house. fantastic. trump said his top three priorities, they asked for his top priorities. he said immigration, health care, and big-league jobs. not just jobs. big-league jobs. which i think -- i have always wanted to play professional baseball, so i think that is fantastic. as for immigration the fact that we elected donald trump has reportedly put mexico on edge. i don't understand, what has donald trump done to make mexicans nervous? is there anything i should know about, guillermo?
the mexican government said for the record they will not pay for a wall. they refused donald trump's venmo request today. don't know? i didn't know what it was until yesterday either. i'm saying it lot now to catch up. experts estimate this wall they think would cost up to $25 billion. do you have any idea how much cocaine they'll have to sell us to cover that? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] here in the united states the anti-trump protest rallies continue. trump weighed in on that subject again on twitter. just had a very open, successful presidential election, now professional protesters incited by the media are protesting, very unfair. professional protesters? well, hey. look at him, he's creating jobs already. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
professional protesters. then strangely nine hours later he changed his position completely. he went from very unfair to love the fact that the small groups of protesters last night have passion for our great country. we will all come together and be proud. which means either someone on his staff took over his twitter feed, or we have our first openly bipolar president of the united states. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] there were protests and probably are some right now in downtown los angeles yesterday. more than 180 people were arrested last night. this morning our local ktla news caught up with a young man who was among those arrested. this is his cautionary tale. >> now i got to feed the meter just because of this. >> why are you out here protesting? >> because i just don't think trump is the right person to be in the white house. >> did you vote in the election? >> i couldn't vote. i wasn't registered. but the least i could do is like
go out here and protest. >> are you 18? >> yeah. >> jimmy: no the least you could do is have voted the other day. this was less than the least you could do. [ laughter ] you know, we go out on the street, people lie to us on camera almost every day. this guy had to tell the truth? i mean, here's how that should have gone. did you vote in the election? of course, what kind of an idiot would come out here if he didn't vote in the election? by the way the turnout for this election was the lowest in 20 years. the lowest since 1996. instead of putting stickers on the shirts of the people who voted, they should put tattoos on the foreheads of those who did not. [ cheers and applause ] by the way, i see all of you clapping. i know at least half of you are lying right now. [ laughter ] believe it or not, hillary clinton still has a chance to win this. according to the constitution, that thing those guys wrote? anyway, clinton could still
become president. i know this is a stretch. but she could still become president if all three "dancing with the stars" judges give her a 10 on monday night. [ laughter ] for real, though, it has to do with the electoral college. the electors are going to meet next month to cast their official votes. this is where it gets weird. there's nothing in the constitution that says they have to vote for whomever the people of their state voted for, they can vote for whoever they want to. they've got a petition now asking these people not to vote for donald trump. there are more than 3 million signatures on it. i don't know, hasn't hillary clinton been through enough? she lost to obama, she lost to trump, she has to lose to trump again? there was a hillary clinton sighting. a woman in upstate new york where hillary clinton lives was bummed about the election, she decided to go for a hike. she put her daughter on her back, she went for a hike. on that hike she ran into hillary clinton. who was with bill clinton in the woods.
[ laughter ] by the way, that's not a joke. [ laughter ] she was with bill clinton in the woods. she's really taking this lock her up thing seriously. the poor woman is hiding in the woods from donald trump. put that picture up one more time. where the hell was that dog the whole campaign? the cute factor could have changed everything. anyway, trump unless the white house and hillary's in the woods. we've heard a lot of -- heard a lot from a lot of people about this election. we heard from pundits, surrogates, experts, anchors. we haven't heard from kids. this afternoon we went on the street just outside our theater to ask children to give us their thoughts on our next president, donald j. trump. >> you know there was an election a couple of days ago, right? >> yes. >> do you know who won? >> donald trump. >> now how does donald trump make you feel?
>> kind of iffy. >> iffy? why is that? >> i don't know, he's really rude. >> how does that make you feel that donald j. trump is your president? >> oh, god. not really comfortable. but i mean -- the world keeps moving on. >> when he became president, what was the face that you made? >> i made an angry face. >> let me see. [ laughter ] >> do you like donald trump? oh! how would you describe donald trump? >> describe him as an idiot. >> an idiot? >> yeah. >> how does that make you feel and why? >> i don't really care because i'm canadian. but i don't like him. >> are you worried everybody is going to come to canada? >> kind of but not snoop dogg, i want snoop dogg to come. >> what do you think he should do, donald trump? >> well, he should clean up the whole earth. >> clean up the whole earth?
>> yeah, he should be a plumber. >> be a plumber? why do you think that? >> because then he gets dirty and he has to clean the toilet. >> if you had to say one nice thing about him, what would you say? >> oh. well. he doesn't -- he's not the ugliest person in the world. >> what does he look like? >> he looks -- weird. >> he does look like a dope. >> a dope? >> yeah. >> do an impression of donald trump. >> i could stand in the middle of broadway and shoot somebody and i wouldn't lose any votes. >> i'm donald trump and i'm the best person in the world and hillary clinton sucks. >> can you do an impression of donald trump? >> she's a nasty woman. [ deep voice ] >> she's a nasty woman! >> is that darth trump? >> is donald trump going to be good? >> he's going to be yuge! >> what do you think about donald trump? >> good guy. >> he's a good guy? >> yeah. >> do you like him?
>> yeah. >> would you want him to be your babysitter? >> no. [ laughter ] >> no? why not? >> because he's -- i don't know. >> you don't trust him? >> no. >> so would you want donald trump to be your dad? >> of course not. >> why not? >> he might murder my mom. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thanks, kids. we have to take a break. when we come back we will play what may very well be the dumbest game show of all-time, so stick around, we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ how else do you think he gets around so fast?
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come join us this season,orld at the all new festival of holidays event... ...including the new world of color season of light show... now at the disneyland resort. >> jimmy: hi, there, welcome back. lin-manuel miranda, dr. kim jong, music from banks on the way. first it's time for a game, we came up with a game, it took almost a full minute to come up with this one. in this game we give pedestrians a chance to win warm, hard cash, it's in the pockets, it's warm. all they have to know is who is on the money. that is the name of the game. we go live to hollywood boulevard. cousin sal is standing by. what is your name? >> sal: my name is sal. >> jimmy: no, i meant -- actually, i see your name, your
name is sheldon, correct? >> yes, sir, jimmy, how are you doing? >> jimmy: i'm doing well. when are you from? >> chicago go cubs. >> jimmy: i don't know if you got the news but they went. >> yeah. >> jimmy: congratulations on that. what do you do for a living? >> i work in mental health. >> jimmy: you do, okay. as a patient? or an attendant? [ laughter ] >> well, i probably should be a patient. but i work in mental health. >> jimmy: great. this is how the game works. we are going to start with a coin, a penny. we're going to ask you to tell us who is on the penny, and if you get that right, we will move up to a nickel. >> all right. >> jimmy: and then a quarter. and so on. do you understand? >> i understand. >> jimmy: all right. let's begin. sal, you have the coins. >> sal: i do right here. >> jimmy: first we have a penny. don't look at it. who is on the penny, sheldon? >> abraham lincoln. >> jimmy: that is absolutely correct. [ cheers and applause ] sheldon wins the penny. you have a decision to make. do you want to stay? do you want to keep that penny?
or do you want to risk it all and go for the nickel? >> i just got paid friday so i'll risk it all. >> jimmy: he's going to risk it all, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. sheldon. >> yes? >> jimmy: who is on the nickel? >> jefferson. >> jimmy: that is absolutely correct, sheldon. >> sal: wow. >> jimmy: sheldon now has 6 cents. sheldon, are we going to try to make it 16 cents? are you going to go for the dime? >> yes, sir. >> jimmy: he's going for the dime. all right. >> sal: can i just say, a lot's happened this week, we don't know where the economy's going, walk away with the money. >> no, no, no. keep going. >> sal: i've seen this many too many times. >> jimmy: let's ask the audience, should he keep going? [ cheers and applause ] the audience wants it, sheldon. sheldon, who is on the dime? nobody yell in the background, please.
>> don knots. >> jimmy: what? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what? >> i don't know. >> jimmy: don is not on the dime. >> sal: i begged you to walk, i begged. >> sheldon, i'm so sorry. >> sal: give me the money. >> jimmy: we're going to have to take that 6 cents back. thank you for playing. well, at least the cubs -- yeah. sal, just take it all, there we go. thank you, sheldon. [ cheers and applause ] let's get another player in there. it's harder than it looks. you think you know. but then you're on the spot. let's see who we have now. hi there, jessica how are you? >> good, how are you? >> jimmy: doing well. are you here on vacation? >> i am in town for a wedding. >>er what are you in town from? >> detroit, michigan. >> jimmy: who's getting married? >> my cousin. >> jimmy: a cousin you like? >> yeah, i love him. >> jimmy: are you in the wedding party? >> i'm not, unfortunately. >> jimmy: this is a cousin you
like but she doesn't like you that much. >> not so much. >> jimmy: how big is the wedding party? >> i can't be sure. i don't know. >> jimmy: wow, so you're really second, maybe third tier. >> yeah. not that important. >> jimmy: you'll be sitting by one of the speakers, right? >> definitely. >> jimmy: all right, are you ready to win money? >> of course. >> jimmy: we're going to start with the smallest coin possible. cousin sal has it in his hand. tell us who is on the penny? >> lincoln? >> jimmy: that is right, abraham lincoln. [ cheers and applause ] all right, you've got 1 cent. >> sal: this is going to be some wedding gift. >> jimmy: do you want to go up to 5? guess who's on the nickel? >> sure. >> jimmy: all right, she's going for it, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] jessica, who is on the nickel? >> nixon? laugh live. >> jimmy: they don't do it through alliteration. no, nixon is not on any of the money. we don't like him, he was bad. [ laughter ] i'm sorry.
wow, that was the quickest out ever. all right, jessica. very well done. thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] we've got to get at least up to a buck. all right, this guy. hi, cobi, where are you from? >> from hawaii. >> jimmy: hawaii. what do you do for a living? >> student at usc. >> jimmy: what are you studying at usc? >> business. >> jimmy: so you should know money, correct? >> oh. sure, why not. why not. >> jimmy: do you understand? i know we've been keeping you sequestered from the others. but the object of this game is to guess -- is to tell us who is on the coin. we're going to start with a penny. okay, who is on the penny? >> abraham lincoln. >> jimmy: that is right. [ cheers and applause ] you have 1 cent. do you want to go for 5 cents? >> 5 cents. >> jimmy: all right. >> sal: i am so nervous right now. >> jimmy: who is on the nickel, cobi? >> thomas jefferson? >> jimmy: that is absolutely correct. you have 6 cents. do you want to make it 16? >> 16 sounds good. >> jimmy: all right, cobi, who is on the dime?
>> can i check my wallet? >> jimmy: you cannot check your wallet but you can think about it. >> can i get a lifeline? >> jimmy: we could give you a lifeline. we have somebody who knows a little something about the presidents and that type of thing. >> oh, wow. >> jimmy: i believe we have lin-manuel miranda. [ cheers and applause ] >> hello, los angeles. >> jimmy: lin, i don't know if you've been keeping up, cobi is about to guess who's on the dime. he needs a lifeline. >> 16 cents? >> jimmy: yes, 16 cents is at stake here. >> all right. so i'm allowed to give him a hint? >> jimmy: you can give him a hint, yes. >> it's a roosevelt. >> jimmy: okay, you only need to say the last name so go with roosevelt. >> roosevelt. >> jimmy: it is roosevelt, that's right! [ cheers and applause ] lin, stay out there. he's going to need help. >> sal: split the money and go. >> jimmy: it's about to get easier.
do you want to keep going? >> let's keep going. >> jimmy: who is on the quarter, cobi? >> george washington? >> jimmy: that is correct. [ cheers and applause ] you've got 41 cents. do you want to go for a dollar? >> yeah. >> jimmy: okay, who is on the dollar, cobi? >> george washington. >> jimmy: all right. [ cheers and applause ] now do you want to stay there? i feel like you probably should stay there. but maybe -- think about it. look at the crowd, everyone outside wants you to go most of those people are homeless but listen to them anyway. who is on the 5 dollar bill? >> abraham lincoln. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that is absolutely correct. all right. >> sal: can we take a commercial break? this is way too intense. >> jimmy: this is where lin's really going to come in handy. do we want to go to the 10 dollar bill? you do.
now lin, i don't think you should help with this one. okay? you can stay out there but don't help with this one. cobi, who is on the 10 dollar bill? >> this would be really funny. >> jimmy: yeah, this would be great. i'll give you a hint. just look next to you. yeah. at him. okay, cobi. have you ever been to broadway? >> i have, once, yeah. >> jimmy: you ever seen a musical? >> yeah. >> jimmy: what's the most popular one you can think of? >> alexander hamilton! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that is absolutely right! that would have been terrible. cobi, do you want to keep going? do you want to stay there? >> keep going. >> jimmy: it's a 20 dollar bill, who's on it, cobi?
>> oh. am i allowed to hand it off again? to lin-manuel again? >> jimmy: you can ask for a clue. >> all right. lin-manuel, can you give me a clue? >> jimmy: trump likes him, no one else does. >> i don't think hitler's on the 20 dollar bill. [ laughter ] >> sal: good guess, good guess. >> jimmy: cobi, what is your guess? >> is it roosevelt? >> jimmy: oh, it is not roosevelt. please give all that money back to my cousin sal. and give a hug to lin-manuel for helping you. he did his best. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, lin. thank you, cobi. thank you, cousin sal. thanks for playing "on the money." [ cheers and applause ] tonight on the show music from banks. we'll be back with ken jeong and albert tsai.
be right back with lin-manuel miranda! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> dicky: portions of jimmy kimmel live are brought to you by tropicana premium drinks, a delicious cocktail mixer for your next party. from the first moment you met it was love at first touch and all you wanted to do was surround them in comfort and protection that's why only pampers swaddlers is the #1 choice of hospitals to wrap your baby in blanket-like softness and premium protection mom: "oh hi baby" so all they feel is love wishing you love, sleep and play. pampers
canada, we will be here with dwayne johnson, casey affleck, billy crystal, billy eichner, lucas hedges, music from dawes, jeezy featuring french montana and two nights with garth brooks. please join us for all that. it's hard to remember, but before our first guest came along, musicals about american history weren't that cool. he's the emmy, tony and grammy-winning author of the hit broadway play "hamilton," now he's writing songs for the rock as co-writer and performer in the animated feature "moana." ♪ we read the wind and the sky when the sun is high ♪ ♪ we sail the length of the seas on the ocean breeze ♪ ♪ at night we name every star we know where we are ♪ >> jimmy: "moana" opens in theaters november 23rd. please welcome lin-manuel miranda! [ cheers and applause ]
♪ >> jimmy: how are you? >> good. >> jimmy: it's great to have you here. the last time i saw you was in new york. you were very nice to invite my wife and i backstage to say hello after "hamilton," which was fantastic. i'm sure you get sick of hearing about it all the time. i was wondering, there weren't a lot of people waiting to come say hello. when you're in that situation, just done a three-hour musical, do you ever get, oh my god, i've got to sit here and say hello to joe biden or something? >> it's funny you bring up joe biden, joe biden was the only visitor with secret service detail who went to the bathroom in the lobby. >> jimmy: he did? >> yeah. imagine you're in the lobby -- >> jimmy: he peed in the lobby? what an animal! >> you know how bad the broadway
lines are. the line wraps around into the lobby. there's joe biden waiting. we're like, you can come backstage. he's like, no, waving to the urinals, he's just joe. >> jimmy: spectacular. >> isn't that crazy? >> jimmy: that is pretty crazy. you were in mexico, right? >> yeah. >> jimmy: what's the mood there? thought that you tested everyone. >> i was in the air election day, flying there this do press for "moana," woke up to the news of the new orange president as you put it. and the headline that came with my coffee in the morning was a picture of donald hugging the flag, which is his thing. he hugs flags. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> and the headline said -- [ speaking spanish ] which i'm happy to translate. "start trembling." >> jimmy: really. >> yeah. that was the headline on the biggest mexican newspaper. >> jimmy: so they're excited about it. >> yes, really.
>> jimmy: optimistic. >> thrilled. ready to get to work on that wall. >> when is "hamilton" starting in l.a.? >> it opens in san francisco, it will be here in august. >> jimmy: are people bothering you for tickets for the show? >> yes, they are. >> jimmy: i would imagine that's a nightmare. how do you deal with that? >> you kind of say, that's not my department. >> jimmy: i see. >> you know, that's -- but you know. better that than the other thing of me on the corner. i did that guy too. i've been like, hey, who wants to come to a show? it's rapping. no? okay, cool. i'd rather people asking me. >> jimmy: that makes sense. there's always people that you can -- like family members, you can't do that. you can't pull that move. you have to be able to get them tickets if you really want them to have tickets. >> absolutely. you've got the family members who are there. i have 60 new cousins i never knew existed. thanks to "hamilton." [ laughter ] they found me. >> jimmy: is it true you wrote jingles for politicians at one time?
>> yeah. my dad's in politics. so one of my -- i was mainly a substitute teacher until i got my first show on. but i would write sort of positive and negative ad music. and it's the easiest job in the world. you hit a minor chord, mm! >> jimmy: these weren't songs about the the -- >> no, the background music for a commercial. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> "jimmy kimmel wants you to believe," insert horrible thing, then you go to a beat salsa music and they're like, vote guillermo! >> jimmy: you had an attack ad against me? >> guillermo: no, no. >> jimmy: where did you find time to write music for a whole animated film? >> well, the crazy thing is i got the job working on "moana" seven months before we started rehearsing "hamilton." i was working on "moana" at the same time i was performing in the show. and we'd have these skype meetings. tuesdays and thursdays before my 7:00 curtain. had a 5:00 meeting. it would be the entire creative
team of "moana" in a room in burbank and then me in a 18th century blouse, sort of weighing in on plot points. well, i think she should leave the island earlier. but i'm dressed like alexander hamilton. that was the only way we had time to make it happen. >> jimmy: was that a dream come true, to be a part of something like this? >> absolutely. >> jimmy: you named your son sebastian. not after a family member, but after the crab in "the little mermaid." does he know he's named after a crab? >> no, and i hope you don't show this to him. [ laughter ] no, we named him that because sebastian's one of the coolest bilingual names. up there with guillermo. guillermo in spanish is powerful. sebastian, it's got a sssssexiness. >> jimmy: except when you look at a cartoon crab. crabs and sexy don't go together in general. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
>> i hadn't thought through that part. >> jimmy: when you are in l.a., i know you're born and raised in new york, do you know how to drive? are you accustomed to our ways here? >> i had a weird experience with that. the first time i came here was to do an acting job on tv. and my now-wife, then-girlfriend, i had to pick her up at the airport with my rental car. i took a weird turn. i found myself driving through south central. and weirdly, i was able to find my way out because i played so much "grand theft auto." [ laughter ] if you play "grand theft auto san andreas," you have a mental map of los angeles already. you don't ever have to actually come here. >> jimmy: really? >> i was like, oh, me and smoky started a gang on this corner. [ laughter ] i turn left here, then i'm uptown. >> jimmy: you and smoky? >> yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: are you planning to take "hamilton" around the world? is this something that will translate to other cultures?
>> i hope so. i pity the translators. there's 23,000 words in this show. >> jimmy: and you have to make things rhyme too. and they have to work. it's not just a matter of just translating. >> there was an amazing japanese production of "in the heights." >> jimmy: we have a clip of that. you've done this before? >> yeah, basically what they do is whoever's licensed the show sends you their translation and then they send you the literal translation of their translation of your work. >> jimmy: i see. >> so you read it sort of through the filter. and a line like "hey, y'all, good morning" becomes "the sun comes up when i see you." sort of a copy of a copy. i saw this japanese direction on youtube. there are so many more syllables in japanese words than english words, i have no idea how these guys breathe, incredible. >> jimmy: let's see if it rings true. ♪ ♪
>> jimmy: so we assume that was good, right? >> it's so dope! >> jimmy: it's great to have you here. we're excited about the show coming up. [ cheers and applause ] and the movie, take the kids to see "moana," it opens november 23rd. lin-manuel miranda! be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ is depression more than sadness? ♪ it's a tangle of multiple symptoms. ♪ ♪ trintellix (vortioxetine) is a prescription medicine for depression. trintellix may start to untangle or help improve the multiple symptoms of depression. for me, trintellix made a difference. tell your healthcare professional right away if your depression worsens, or you have unusual changes in mood, behavior or thoughts of suicide. antidepressants can increase these in children, teens, and young adults. trintellix has not been studied in children.
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>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. ken jeong, albert tsai, and music from banks is on the way, albert tsai! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how's it going? you're dressed almost alike. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: was that intentional? >> no, just a coincidence. >> jimmy: just a coincidence. it's good to have you here. how did you become tv father and son? did you meet in the audition process? >> actually, ken and i had done an episode of "hot in cleveland." it was their season 5 life premiere which was life rock fest. >> jimmy: how old were you then? >> think then 9 or 10. >> jimmy: did you say, i'd like you to be my daddy one day on
television? >> when i first met ken, i thought he was really nice. >> jimmy: you thought? >> you thought i was really nice? i'm nicer now? >> jimmy: is he nicer now? or was he nicer then? >> we've gotten closer. >> jimmy: you've gotten closer. very diplomatic. >> good non-answer. >> jimmy: have you seen ken in "the hangover"? >> no. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> from what i've heard, luckily no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, i disagree. how long have you been acting? >> i've been acting for three years. >> jimmy: so since you were a kid. >> yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that was right at the beginning. did you believe that ken was really a doctor? for those who don't know, ken is a real doctor. he threw that all away to become an actor. >> did you believe i was a
doctor when you met me? did you think i was really smart, really educated? >> well, actually, the first role i saw you in was a doctor. >> oh okay. >> on "hot in cleveland." you were a doctor. >> that's right, that's right. >> i didn't know you were a doctor at first. then i wikipedia'd you and it said you were a doctor and actor. >> so my performance wasn't convincing enough, you had to go online. got it. >> jimmy: you wikipedia'd him. have you ever had, ken, a situation where you've had to treat albert or anybody on the set for any kind of injury or given a flu shot or anything like that? >> you're a healthy boy so i've never had to treat you. every -- like on "dr. ken," i think dave foley had a cold or some allergies or things like that. it happens. i don't really prescribe much but i kind of -- usually it's a virus. >> jimmy: albert, do you think that ken is cool when he has done something like that? where he's gone in and examined somebody and maybe cured them or helped them get better? >> yeah, he's cool. he goes into this kind of
different doctor mode. >> jimmy: oh, really? >> yeah, it's a lot more serious. then after everything's taken care of he goes back to funny ken. >> reporter: back to funny. are you planning to be an actor when you're grown up? is this your plan for your life? >> i might be an actor when i grow up. but i also want to maybe do some behind the scenes stuff. like director or producer. because i'm interested in that type of thing. >> jimmy: you like that kind of thing also, yeah. will you go to college? will you skip that? i would skip it if i was you. >> i think i'd stick with college. >> jimmy: you would stick with college. [ laughter ] >> seriously, albert talks in like showbiz speak all the time on set. every day instead of yes it's left side, "copy that." "should i reset, go back to one"? everything is industry speak. >> jimmy: where did you learn that stuff? picked it up along the way? >> yeah, picked it up. i heard other people say it.
i'd be like, what does that mean? then i just picked it up and kind of just became like instinct. >> jimmy: part of your deal. when you guys are doing lines, are you -- do you ever forget them? is one of you more forgetful than the other? >> i forget my lines all the time. i'm pretty bad. you're a pro, you're really good at staying on the ball. >> i mean, sometimes -- i think on our show, more than like if we forget the lines, it's more we'll like break character. we'll start laughing. i think that's more common. >> yeah, i'm the worst at laugh organize giggling or destroying takes. yeah, usually -- albert has a thing -- >> jimmy: a funny laugh. >> right. he has the funniest laugh. >> jimmy: let's tickle him and see what it sounds like. [ applause ] >> jimmy: it is a funny laugh, yeah, wow. you could be standing right next to guillermo, i've not heard a
laugh cuter than his until tonight. now i heard you were a good dancer. do you want to do a little bit of dancing? [ cheers and applause ] >> sure. >> jimmy: all right, here we go. "dr. ken" airs friday nights at 8:30 here on abc. albert tsai and ken jeong, everybody. ken, you're good too. we'll be right back with music from banks! >> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series presented by ciroc. let's get it. cooking dinner for the in laws? not on her mom's radar. beating cancer and having their kids live... that's all their parents think of. at st. jude children's research hospital, we're fighting for kids not as lucky as yours. treatments invented at st. jude have helped push the overall childhood cancer survival rate from 20% to 80%.
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♪ ♪ ♪ outdoing yourself today. you're really are you the chef today? and are you thinking wow. i'm really outdoing myself right now. [ambient noise of family cheering] well then your friends definitely need to see this before it's devoured. so grab your phone and open facebook. tap here. and go live. ok , flip the camera so we can see that spread. and start promising leftovers. even thought there won't be any.
>> dicky: the "jimmy kimmel live" concert series presented by ciroc. let's get it. >> jimmy: i'd like to thank lin-manuel miranda, ken jeong, albert tsai and apologize to matt damon we ran out of time. "nightline" is next but first this is her album, it's called "the altar." here with the song "train wreck," banks! ♪
♪ hey i heard it from the state they told me you were never gonna ♪ ♪ let me get away and if you took me fishing you would never give me bait ♪ ♪ i had to get away i had to get away hey hey ♪ ♪ you try to compensate for thinking with your one brain i should decapitate ♪ ♪ you showed me all your letters that i should've confiscated but both my eyes ♪ ♪ were weighted i had to get away talking to ears that have been dead for as long ♪ ♪ as i can remember a self-medicated handicap so i speak to myself and i try so hard ♪ ♪ to get his stupid deaf ears to hear that i become illiterate i become dumb ♪ ♪ yeah yeah when i come through you were dark blue ♪ ♪ and i saved you from your
darker days born to take care of you or i thought so ♪ ♪ maybe it was just a phase hey i heard it from the state they told me you were ♪ ♪ never gonna let me get away and if you took me fishing you would ♪ ♪ never give me bait i had to get away i had to get away i had to get away ♪ ♪ hey you try to compensate for thinking with your one brain i ♪ ♪ should decapitate you showed me all your letters that i should've confiscated ♪ ♪ but both my eyes were weighted i had to get away shot down by a guy ♪ ♪ i never wanted to kiss and i can hear the singing of his ringing triumphing ♪ ♪ and now i'm chugging along in a train and i'm headed the wrong way i'm a train-wreck ♪ ♪ and my heart goes beat beat beat to the music of this sad same song it's ♪ ♪ quite depressing there is no fixing to the problem when you're talking ♪ ♪ to an idiot when i come through you were dark blue and i
saved you ♪ ♪ from your darker days born to take care of you or i thought so maybe it was just a phase ♪ ♪ baby only maybe just a dreamer but i soon found out heard the train tracks ♪ ♪ were behind me tried to warn me but both of my ears went out ♪ ♪ when i come through you were dark blue and i saved you from your darker days born to take care of you ♪ ♪ or i thought so maybe it was just a phase hey i heard it from the state ♪ ♪ they told me you were never gonna let me get away and if you took me fishing you would ♪ ♪ never give me bait i had to get away i had to get away i had
this is "nightline." >> tonight, painful procedure, a florida dentist accused of performing needless operation on children without parents saying okay. allegedly billing medicaid for millions. >> he don't care about innocent children. >> and the mother who rallied other parents to take him down. >> sometimes it feels like it's flown by, plus ellen pompeii owe takes us into the "grey". are her days off camera as steamy and dreamy? she talks mother hood and why she chose to extend her stay at seattle