Skip to main content

tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  December 7, 2018 11:35pm-12:38am PST

11:35 pm
search accuweather in your app store and download now. >> set it up for picking on her. >> it's friday. thanks for joining us. jimm >> dicky: from hollywood, it's jimmy kimmel live! tonight julie bowen. from "rupaul's drag race all-stars," rupaul. kim kardashian west. and music from phosphorescent. and now, stay right where you are. it's jimmy kimmel! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: very nice. thanks. hola. thank you. thank you very much. how are you? hey, everyone. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the program. thank you very much. thank you for watching at home. thank you for coming.
11:36 pm
i'm happy to be -- we are back to work after -- we had a week off. all of a sudden it's christmas. christmas snuck up on us. i woke up one morning there was a tree in my house, swear to god. and an elf has returned to our shelf. this elf on the shelf, first of all, it works. our daughter jane is 4 years old. that elf is in the room, i don't know who this kid is, she is an angel. yesterday she shared a toy with her brother for probably the first time in their lives. she has a -- airplane and he wanted it. so instead of tackling him and taking it from him, not only did she share it, she presented to him, like vana white revealing the board on "wheel of fortune." [ laughter ] and then i swear to god, she gives it to him. billy, i know this is mine, but i want you to play with it. and then, i swear to god she did this. she turned and winked at the elf. [ laughter ]
11:37 pm
got that? see? [ cheers and applause ] it's good for that, but there's a lot of work involved with this elf. every night you have to move it. last night i set an alarm so i could get out of bed. i put her to sleep, but i knew she wasn't asleep yet. i set an alarm in my bed so i could go back into her room to move the elf while she was sleeping. and i know we're going to forget about it. i can barely keep up with the tooth fairy. [ laughter ] my older kids, the tooth fairy would forget to come for like 21 days in a row. [ laughter ] some people go nuts with these elves. i see on instagram, the people build these scenarios where the elf is on a skateboard with a toothpick as a javelin. we don't do any of that. we're three nights in and we're already out of shelves to put him on. last night i stuffed him in a tissue box, but there needs to be a service that comes to your house and moves the elf around for you because tonight we're already out of ideas. tonight i'm just going to duct tape the elf to a roomba and let him move around the room himself. [ laughter ]
11:38 pm
krauts. >> jimmy: anyway, that's what i did this weekend. the president had a busy weekend. the president was in south america, which is the america he hasn't ruined yet. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] but he was in -- he was in buenos aires for the g20 summit where he signed a trade deal with mexico and canada. now, there's the president with enrique pena nieto. the now former president of mexico. the canadian prime minister, justin trudeau. they're done signing and he's still signing his name. all he's signing is his name. they wait. now they have to switch them around. he piles his on top. justin trudeau is like, no, you sign that one. now, keep in mind, he has 12 letters in his name. donald j. trump. it's not, it's not enrique pena nieto, and there they're waiting again. [ laughter ] like he's cheating. let's rotate these around one more time. is this -- all right, there you go.
11:39 pm
now they're waiting for him to give them a head start. [ laughter ] and these guys are done, and justin trudeau just hangs out. [ laughter ] it's like he's coloring it in or something. [ laughter and cheers ] you know, i think, i think this might be why it took him two months to answer robert mueller's questions. [ laughter ] of course, no trip overseas would be complete without an awkward exchange with the world leaders. so they introduce -- >> the president of the united states of america. >> the president of the united states of america, donald trump. and you can see it already, he's mad that there's no big applause or anything like that. he's used to the rallies. but he greets the president of argentina. and while the photographers are taking pictures, they exchange pleasantries, they talk a little. and then, okay. so now the pictures are done. he shakes his hand again and says whatever, and then wanders off. but it's not -- wait, no, hey,
11:40 pm
wait, this guy comes, hey, come back. the you hear the president say -- he says, get me out of here. [ laughter ] i guess he got word that the mcrib was back and he had to go. [ laughter ] the president has a habit of doing that sort of thing. he carries himself like a demented grandfather who accidentally wandered into a wedding ceremony. [ laughter and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ laughter ] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
11:41 pm
>> jimmy: and they're out. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: this is another fun encounter between trump and the argentinian president. trump had some trouble with the ear piece they gave him that provided the spanish to english translation. we could hear what was said. >> translator: wow, now that i'm seeing donald trump in person, he is much fatter than i imagined. get a load of this guy. i knew they called him 45. i didn't mean they meant his waist size. he's big, folks. trump is so big, he has to fly an air force one and a half. in honor of president trump, we are changing the name of our country to large-entina. he lives in the white castle house. that red thing around his neck isn't a tie, it's a ketchup stain. anyway, i'm getting the light, so that's my time.
11:42 pm
>> jimmy: yeah, well, he's a funny guy. [ cheers and applause ] then this morning the president was back on track, back home firing off a series of tweets about the russia vest investigation. he again went after special counsel robert mueller and took some hard shots at his former lawyer michael cohen. he wrote, michael cohen asked judge for no prison time. you mean he can do all of the terrible unrelated to trump things having to do with fraud, big loans, taxes, et cetera, and not serve a long prison term? he makes up stories to get a great and already reduced deal for himself, and get, dot-dot-dot -- then five full minutes go by. [ laughter ] his wife and father-in-law, who has the money, who has the money? i don't know, off scot free. he lied for this outcome and should, in my opinion, serve a full and complete sentence. this is coming from a guy who can barely tweet a full and complete sentence. [ laughter ] wrote scott free like it's a guy named scott. scott free.
11:43 pm
[ laughter ] are we sure he doesn't drink? because these are the rantings of someone who is drunk by 9:00 in the morning. but he also -- [ applause ] it wasn't all negative. he also wrote a tweet of support for roger stone, another team trumper who is in the shadow of possible mueller indictment. he wrote, i will never testify against trump. this statement was recently made by roger stone, essentially stating that he will not be forced by a rogue and out of control prosecutor to make up lies and stories about president trump. nice to know that some people still have guts. [ laughter ] nice to see the present carve out time from "fox & friends" to engage in some good old-fashioned witness tampering. live live [ laughter ] but trump wants roger stone to know he has his back. by the way, you know you're in trouble when one of the only people you can count on is this guy. [ laughter ] the guy who framed roger rabbit is your only friend?
11:44 pm
[ laughter and applause ] just in case you're not sure which side of history roger stone falls on, he has -- and this is real -- a tattoo of richard nixon on his back. [ laughter ] and soon a donald trump tramp stamp to add to the collection. [ laughter ] about an hour after that, after all this, he tweets, looking forward to being with the bush family to pay my respects to president george h.w. bush. as he looks forward to paying his respects to a family he spent the last three years disrespecting. my sincere condolences to low energy jeb and his children on this terrible loss. it's important to know our country isn't the only one with high-level nuttiness going on. the president of nigeria is defending himself against an unusual accusation. this is a real tweet from muhammad du buhari. he wrote, one of the questions that came up today with my neerjs in poland was on the issue of whether i've been cloned or not. the ignorant rumors are not surprising. when i was away on medical
11:45 pm
vacation last year, a lot of people hoped i was dead. the president was out of the country for more than three months last year and there's a rumor he died and they replaced him with a clone. which would mean they planned this when he was born, i guess. [ laughter ] he says that is not true. he says, i can assure you all that this is the real me. later this month i will celebrate my 76th birthday and i am still going strong, which is exactly what a clone would say in that situation. [ laughter ] so, i don't know. i mean -- [ cheers and applause ] but imagine that. a clone president. kind of reminds me of that movie with kevin kline, "dave." remember that? guillermo, have you ever seen that movie "dave"? >> no, jimmy, i have not seen it. >> jimmy: wait a second, are you a clone? >> no, i am the real guillermo. >> jimmy: we just got back from vacation, someone may have swapped guillermos. he's probably back in the green room. get a shot of the green room, please. yes. >> number eight, let's do it!
11:46 pm
>> guillermo, guillermo, guillermo! >> jimmy: guillermo! guillermo! oh my god. guillermo. >> guillermo: hi, jimmy! >> jimmy: hi. why aren't you in here working, guillermo? >> guillermo: i am there working, jimmy. look at the doors. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ] no, that isn't you at the door. >> guillermo: it's not me? >> jimmy: no, it's not you. >> guillermo: oh, i guess i called in drunk today. >> number nine, number nine! >> jimmy: guillermo clone, would you mind giving the real guillermo a ride home tonight? >> you got it. >> jimmy: very good. this is good. a substitute teacher in montville, new jersey, was teaching a first grade class and
11:47 pm
the subject of christmas came up. so she decided to tell the kids the truth about -- reportedly she told kids, santa isn't real, reindeer don't fly, the tooth fairy and easter bunny were made up. she also told the kids they were adopted. [ laughter ] the principal of the school had to apologize to parents. aren't substitute teachers supposed to show a movie and maybe take sips of whiskey out of a flask or something? [ laughter ] i have to say, a teacher did the same thing to me. they told me about santa. and it absolutely crushed me. i was 17 years old, which is different. [ laughter ] but tonight, in case you don't know, is the second night of hanukkah. so happy hanukkah to those who are celebrating this -- [ cheers and applause ] this overlooked holiday. christmas gets most of the attention, but hanukkah is important, too. a lot of children are familiar. most children are familiar with the story of christmas, but they're less educated about the miracle of hanukkah. we went out on the street and we asked kids who don't celebrate hanukkah to tell us what they know about this holiday. and this is what they said.
11:48 pm
>> have you ever heard of hanukkah? >> yeah. >> what is hanukkah? >> it's where jewish people, um, celebrate hanukkah on christmas. >> what is hanukkah? >> um, it's where some other people celebrate christmas and some other people don't celebrate it like that. >> which other people, do you know? >> no. >> it's jewish people. have you heard of jewish people? >> no. >> where do you live? >> salt lake city. >> that makes sense. why doesn't santa bring any of the jewish kids toys? >> because they're jewish. >> can you spell hanukkah? >> um, can i try? >> yep.
11:49 pm
>> h-o-n-e-c-c-h? >> you know what, you're probably right. there's no wrong answer. here you go. >> thank you. >> would you like to meet a jewish person? >> yeah. >> eric, come here. this is eric. he's jewish, and he's a tv comedy writer. they're all tv comedy writers. >> oh, okay. >> who brings people presents on christmas? >> santa. >> who brings them presents on hanukkah? >> um -- >> it's melissa rivers. >> oh. >> do you know any hanukkah songs? >> yeah. >> could you sing one for us? ♪ hanukkah hanukkah come light the menorah ♪ that's all i know. [ applause ] >> pretty good. >> jimmy: thank you, kids. tonight on the show we have music from phosphorescent and three ridiculous questions with kim kardashian west.
11:50 pm
rupaul is here. we'll be right back with julie bowen. [speaking in italian] ...i just got my ancestrydna results: 74% italian. and i found out that i'm from the big toe of that sexy italian boot! calabria. it even shows the migration path from south italia all the way to exotico new jersey! so this holiday season it's ancestrydna per tutti! order your kit now at yeah right. iand the earth is flat. ahhh!! treat your cough seriously with robitussin cf max. nothing lasts longer and treats more symptoms for your cough, cold and flu. robitussin. because it's never just a cough.
11:51 pm
whose stuff you always borrow. so get something really nice... for when you raid her closet... ooo chasmere... ...or crash on her couch. at this price, get your own. you've got people to shop for. we've got ideas and great prices. ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪
11:52 pm
thdelicious.i-wheat. but it's more than that. 10 layers of crunchy wheat to fill you up on big days. whether your day involves steam, mountains, or woah- fire... ...we've got your breakfast right here. is your breakfast built for big days?
11:53 pm
'tisbring the whole family,y at petsmartand your pets, days. to petsmart for a free photo with santa this weekend and next, from noon to four pm. make holiday memories this weekend at petsmart, for the love of pets.
11:54 pm
>> jimmy: hi there, welcome back to the show. tonight from the very popular vh1 show "rupaul's drag race: all stars," rupaul is here. his new album is called c'est la vie. "phosphorescent" from the mercedes-benz stage. tomorrow night justin theroux, we'll have music from gucci mane, chris elliott, jimmy tetro rita ora, and gwen stefani will join us. so please be a part of that. we appreciate it. our first guest tonight is a
11:55 pm
multi emmy winning actress who over of the past ten years raised six children, three of them fictional, three real. she plays claire on "modern family" wednesday nights at 9:00 on abc. please welcome julie bowen. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how are you? >> my mom said i had to wear pants now on your show. >> jimmy: why? >> because i'm like on the show -- there's a lot of this. this actually feels very comfortable now. >> jimmy: why must your mother impact my life in a negative way? >> she ruins everything, right? i know, i'm sorry. >> jimmy: she did? >> yes, i have to wear pants so i look respectable. >> jimmy: you do look great. there's no question about that. >> thank you. >> jimmy: how are you doing? >> i'm good. i just got back -- thanksgiving was long. >> jimmy: it was long. >> they give the kids time off from school. >> jimmy: yes, oh, i know.
11:56 pm
>> little kids. they're home for an extended period of time. >> jimmy: right. >> you have to feed, clothe, entertain, so i took mine to -- i took mine abroad. >> jimmy: oh, to where? >> i took them to austria. >> jimmy: to vienna, austria? >> to vienna. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have an audience member -- really, who? >> i have to stuff to say. you know, most livable city, voted most livable. >> jimmy: that's right. >> there's a ritual there at around 5:00 p.m. we were on a boat, really cool like a river thing. >> jimmy: river boat. >> we would stop and get off. i was with my family so i'd get off and run. run. and around 5:30 every night there would be these packs of moms and the strollers just cutting a butt, packs and packs of smoking mommies. i was like, this is frightening.
11:57 pm
they don't even have the decency -- they don't hide it from the kid, like hold the thing down. this is the way it is. and you like it! tough people. [ applause ] >> tough people. >> jimmy: that's interesting. >> yeah, that could be -- it could cut into your liveability rating just a little. >> jimmy: did you get to travel abroad? we never went anywhere. >> my parents were like, this is america and you're going to see it. they put us in the station wagon. i saw like every ball of wax. wild bill museum. everything else. i didn't get to go to europe until i was on my own and like went with a student trip when i was 14. that's why i thought it would be fun to take the boys now. but it turns out that maybe they'll go later eventually. [ laughter ] >> when they can drink. i think there is some drinking that needs to be done. >> jimmy: what was the best trip you took when you were first going out? >> oh, i studied in italy. it was supposed to be for a semester. it turned out to be a year.
11:58 pm
>> jimmy: what were you studying? >> italian renaissance studies. it was a little vague. it was all in italian. let me tell you, though, jimmy, if i may hold your hand and talk to you. "me too" is a very serious thing. >> jimmy: i agree. >> in italy we would call that unca illo. >> jimmy: which? >> i did not live there -- this is way pre-"me too." so grabbing, cat calling, whistling, hands on body was encouraged and considered a real sign of, you've made it here. i had blonde hair halfway down my back. i was a queen in italy. i was 18 years old -- >> jimmy: oh, you liked it? >> i loved it. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> i loved it. i was like, at first i'm like, no, no, no. and walking to school with my book bag, a long walk to school. and then by a little while in, i was like, anyone on a vespa can take me to school. >> jimmy: oh, really, that was your uber back then.
11:59 pm
>> everybody was on a vespa with an espresso. smoking. don't know how they did it. yeah, hop on the back of a vespa. >> jimmy: did you ever date any of your transporters? >> yes. >> jimmy: you did? >> fabio. not the fabio. fabio. >> jimmy: it would be better if it was the fabio. >> this fabio was pretty good. he looked really good, but the proof was i brought him back to the u.s. he was site specific. >> jimmy: oh, wow, it was serious. >> it was until i got him here. he did fine in his native habitat, but then like took him out of there and he was like, like -- i don't know, somebody that eats their own poop in a cage. [ laughter ] >> he couldn't, he couldn't speak english, wasn't interested in speaking english. was very good looking. >> jimmy: okay. >> keep in mind before you judge me. he was incredibly handsome. but he spoke no english, and i was working my butt off. i was working -- i was waiting tables. i had an internship. it was summer between junior and
12:00 am
senior year of college. he would sit at home all day. i didn't know what he did. we had a tiny studio apartment. i would come home. he'd be like, julie -- [ speaking foreign language ] i'm like, what is he talking about? i speak italian, but he keeps telling me about how he spends his day watching bubba rosa. he loves it. he's a genius, this bubba rosa. i don't know what this is. is it a clown? and then one night we're lying on our futon. [ laughter ] >> it's nighttime, so it's flat. that's how you know. i was lying on the futon. we were switching channels and on comes a man whisperingly painting a squirrel in a tree. he goes, bubba rosa. i'm like, bob ross? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, that's good. >> my hard earned waitressing dollars and you're watching bob ross all day, every day.
12:01 am
i still kept him, i kept him for one more mishap. i kept him like a dog, i'm sorry. again, so beautiful. [ laughter ] >> i came home again one day from working hard, and he's, you know, i don't know, he's lying on the couch moaning. oh -- [ speaking foreign language ] >> i'm like, what? i ate all the prosciutto and marscapone. no, i'm a college student. do you think i have prosciutto and marscapone? what did he eat? i go in the trash can and there is an empty package of raw bacon and an empty tub of cream cheese. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: wow, he really was an animal in a cage eating his own -- [ laughter ] >> but it's not like he cooked
12:02 am
it. plus, what kind of commitment does it take when you go through that first piece of bacon? [ laughter ] >> like he had to double down. how do you go for the second piece? >> jimmy: well, wherever you are, fabio, i hope you're doing better than you did here. julie bowen is here. "modern family" is the show. we'll be right back. ♪ you gotta see this! ♪ owen's gonna do it! ♪ i got him. ♪ come on, come on, come on! alright! come on, come on! come on! yeah! ♪ so how about another game?
12:03 am
♪whooh! ♪ just released. i got it. new pixel 3. ♪ chloë! give again! ♪ ♪ [ holiday music playing ] a volkswagen test drive, proof that holiday travel can be fun. the volkswagen "drive to decide" event. ( ♪ )
12:04 am
♪ ♪ connecting people... ...uniting the world. ♪♪
12:05 am
12:06 am
12:07 am
i don't know if i want another half-finished project in the garage. >> the only reason i started working on the lawn mower is because he started getting too smart. come on, honey, let's keep it. >> it remains me how crazy my mom could be. what mother has a car like this? >> how's this? we take it for one drive. if you're not smiling when we come back, we get rid of it. >> one drive? >> one drive. >> one drive. >> she used to double buckle me and mitchell in the front seat. between that and the homemade electric blankets, it's a wonder we're still alive. >> that is julie bowen. [ cheers and applause ]
12:08 am
>> jimmy: julie, shelley long played your mom. >> dead. >> jimmy: not in real life. >> no, not in real life. fake life, dead. >> jimmy: i want to be very clear shelley long is alive. >> very alive, yes. >> jimmy: and your tv daughter sarah -- >> also alive. >> jimmy: not really sarah highland unless there's something i don't know. sarah is not pregnant. >> her character haley is pregnant. there's all this other stuff, i don't think i'm supposed to say it. there's stuff that happens. >> jimmy: say it all. >> no! if we're pregnant, that's where the audience is at pregnant, that's where i'm stopping. >> jimmy: oh, is there something weird that happens? >> there are so many things that happened this season, it's a lot. i need a cheat sheet. i have no idea. >> jimmy: last time i think we discussed this, it was supposed to be the final season of "modern family." >> uh-huh. and here i am. >> jimmy: i believe there were conversations about what will you take from the set -- >> are you saying you want me gone? >> jimmy: no, not at all, quite the contrary.
12:09 am
i hope you guys stay and continue to do many more seasons. but it's interesting, i've heard now that you're going to do another season maybe. is that true? possible? >> they're talking about it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: who is talking about it, you guys? >> yes. >> jimmy: yes. >> yes, yes. but you know abc, a very special place. but there are changes. you never know, who knows. i hope -- i want it to come back. i really enjoy it and i'm terribly lazy and have become accustomed to these people. i like them. i'm comfortable with them. the kids are all grown up. >> jimmy: did you have real kids before you had tv kids? >> i had one real kid and i had two real kids in my real stomach when i had three fake kids on the show. on the pilot i was pregnant with the twins. so they taught me how to, like, you know, be mean, how to know the kids are not supposed to like you as a parent. i learned these things. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: have you ever had to ground one of your tv kids, or really let one of them have it?
12:10 am
>> there was a time -- and i won't say who -- where i did whip a cell phone out of somebody's hand. >> jimmy: oh, you did? >> yeah, a, you have a cell phone. they were teenagers at the time. and, b, they would like text all the time. and i was like, unacceptable. now i realize there's nothing you can do about that. you're texting right now. i can see your other set hand. he has a second set of hands just like this. >> jimmy: my mannequin hands. i'm not one much those guys. i don't text that much. >> i don't either. i turn it off. it pissis people off. >> jimmy: that makes us better than everybody else. julie bowen, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "modern family," wednesday nights at 9:00 on abc. we're back with three ridiculous questions with kim kardashian west. ♪ ♪
12:11 am
(vo) you do more than grant wishes when you share the love. you give hope. get a new subaru, like the all new forester, and charities like make-a-wish can receive two hundred and fifty dollars from subaru. (vo) get zero percent during the subaru share the love event. (parents)an) oh hey, baby. happy holidays! (woman) awh, you're having an ugly sweater party? (dad) what? (woman) (dad) uh, are you throwing a burnt cookie party? (mom) no, i think she's having a messy kitchen party. (woman) very funny, you guys. uh huh. [parents laughing] (mom) deal'em frank.
12:12 am
♪ ♪ love loud... love le vian. from the world's only chocolate diamonds... to gemstones bursting with color. no one colors your world like le vian. and nobody sells more le vian than kay.
12:13 am
what's the worst part about paying for things you don't want? the-- paying. and what's the best part about getting things you do want for free? free stuff. that's why verizon now comes with six months of free apple music. i like music. i like popcorn. how dare you! (vo) get $300 off our best iphones, on the network you deserve. emreplenished,d, fortified. emerge everyday with emergen-c. packed with b vitamins, electrolytes, antioxidants, plus more vitamin c than 10 oranges. why not feel this good every day? emerge and see. because you picked your boss. who's particular about her nail color... but even more so her coffee. getting these for twenty dollars, that's your secret, santa. you've got people to shop for.
12:14 am
we've got ideas and great prices. ♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪ the new capital one savor card. earn 4% cash back on dining and 4% on entertainment. now when you go out, you cash in. what's in your wallet?
12:15 am
12:16 am
>> jimmy: welcome back to the show. rupaul and phosphorescent are on their way. the first three ridiculous questions with kim kardashian west. ♪ this is a philosophical question. if a selfie gets posted and no one likes it, was it ever a
12:17 am
selfie at all? >> absolutely. i mean, that hasn't happened to me, so i have no -- >> jimmy: yeah, right. >> no real connection to that. >> jimmy: right. >> but i do believe that it still is a selfie. >> jimmy: of all your sisters, which of them do you think would be most likely to sue you? [ laughter ] >> kourtney. >> jimmy: why kourtney? >> she is ruthless. >> jimmy: has she ever threatened legal action against you? >> maybe as a joke. >> jimmy: interesting. >> when i used her character in a video game. and i -- yes. >> jimmy: when is the last time you spoke with a telemarketer? >> all the time. >> jimmy: do you take it when you see the number on the phone? >> i block them. >> jimmy: and then they call with a different number? >> uh-huh.
12:18 am
but i think kanye used to be a telemarketer, so i try to be nice. >> jimmy: is that right? >> i think so. >> jimmy: let's have a toast to telemarketers. nobody likes them, but one of them came out of and it got pretty famous. >> you never know who's calling. >> jimmy: you never know who's calling, great point. >> ciroc vodka, for all of life's ridiculous questions. for a limited time try black raspberry.
12:19 am
♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ that one daddy! it's beautiful. i'm the world's greatest douglas fir. i'm the perfect shape. i'm the perfect color. my scent- like making love to a lumberjack. but halfway home, my twine gets loose. and your cut-rate insurance might not pay for this.
12:20 am
so get allstate. where you can save money and be better protected from mayhem like me. mayhem is everywhere. so get an allstate agent. are you in good hands? thdelicious.i-wheat. but it's more than that. 10 layers of crunchy wheat to fill you up on big days. whether your day involves steam, mountains, or woah- fire... ...we've got your breakfast right here. is your breakfast built for big days? ybut life...can throw them off bbalance.of bacteria,
12:21 am
(vo) re-align yourself with align probiotic. and try align gummies with prebiotics and probiotics to help support digestive health. ♪ from our family to yours. petsmart - for the love of pets. yaaaayyy!!! aww. yaaaayyy!!! aww. yaaaayyy!!! aww. we hide hotel names, so you can find four star hotels at two star prices. h-o-t-w-i-r-e so mom's making a deliciously easy dip. two cups of sour cream, bacon, and of course a packet of hidden valley ranch. that's how delicious is done. it's time to ranch out with the original, hidden valley ranch.
12:22 am
jump in to old navy for up to sixty percent off the entire store. ♪ that's up to sixty percent off with sleep from seven dollars, sweaters from twelve dollars. need gifts today? buy online, pickup in-store. ends soon, at old navy! (robot) ugh. this screen!tected! you know, sprint has the awesome new iphone xr. oooh. let's take a picture! whoa! it's so clear! yeah, it has an amazing liquid retina display... (photographer) look at the colors! ...on a network built for unlimited. this is amazing! i can't hold this smile much longer! i can. (vo) and now, get iphone xr on us when you lease the latest iphone. for people with hearing loss, switch to sprint today! visit
12:23 am
>> jimmy: welcome back. still to come, phosphorescent. the next guest is the host of the only show with a bigger makeup budget than "the walking dead."
12:24 am
a new season of "rupaul's drag race: all stars" premiers december 14 on vh1. please say hello to rupaul. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: i wish i could wear a suit like that. >> you can wear a suit like this. everybody says that. all men say that. you can wear it. >> jimmy: you don't know my friends. >> lose those friends. you'll get new friends if you wear something like this. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you're probably right. good advice. it really is good advice. how are you doing? >> i feel great. >> jimmy: did you work today? were you doing the show? >> we filmed drag race already. i'm working on another show for netflix. it's a scripted series. >> jimmy: oh, really? that's what you really want to do, act? >> i just want to do whatever people offer me to do. i like to work. if they offer me a job, i'm
12:25 am
going to take it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: any job? >> yes, i will. >> jimmy: can i ask you about a photograph i'm interested in? this is a classic grouping here. this is you with nirvana. >> yeah, that's 25 years ago. >> jimmy: 25 years ago, where was this, the vmas? >> the vmas. what's funny on the new season of "drag race" -- the baby is not in the picture there, but there's a picture with frances bean. i got to meet her 25 years later just this past summer. >> jimmy: oh, on the show? >> yes, she's a judge. >> jimmy: how about that. >> she's a judge on "drag race." >> jimmy: did she know about that interaction with her dad? >> she did. she's been haunted by that photo for 25 years, so yeah. >> jimmy: that's pretty crazy. >> isn't it cool? >> jimmy: it is weird when you meet somebody as a fully formed adult. you were holding them and maybe they were pooping. who knows. [ laughter ] >> we have a lot of great guest judges on our show.
12:26 am
>> jimmy: who are they? >> i can't remember any of them now but they're all great, really great. [ laughter ] >> actually, this friday i have a christmas special, my fourth, my fourth christmas special is on vh1 this friday at 8:00. >> jimmy: when do you tape the christmas special? >> we taped it in the summer. >> jimmy: isn't that weird? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and how long does it take you to get into the garb? >> about 300 years. it does, about 300 years. i started right after the second world war. [ laughter ] >> doing drag. >> jimmy: does it take an hour -- >> why are you obsessed with me, jimmy? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: i'm interested in it. by the way, i am kind of obsessed with you, especially after i saw this. now, this is a photograph, this is you, and this is not -- this is not like a halloween thing or something like that. this is you on the ranch you live on in wyoming. >> yes. >> jimmy: what kind of a ranch is this?
12:27 am
>> well, first of all, people have a weird idea what ranches is from movies and stuff. a modern ranch is really land management. my husband owns a 60,000 acre ranch, a 60,000 acre ranch. >> jimmy: awesome. >> which is, you lease out the mineral rights, you sell water to the oil companies, and you lease out lots of land for cattle people who have -- you know, they moo. >> jimmy: yes, yes, those. yes, i've seen them. >> yeah. and what's funny about that, i'm the only one in wyoming who dresses in western wear. >> jimmy: is that right? >> yes. >> jimmy: come on. >> i want to wear these fabulous western wear outfits. >> jimmy: that's a good outfit. >> no one else is wearing that, no one. no one else is wearing is that. >> jimmy: do they know you from the show? >> they don't know, they don't care. no tina shea. they are very frosty up there. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. they're very, very chilly up there. it's not a racial thing. it's just an environmental
12:28 am
thing. it's -- they're very frosty. so i go up there and read books. >> jimmy: i have a theory as to why that is. >> why is that? >> jimmy: if you live in brooklyn, people are the opposite, because everyone's piled on top of each other. when you have a lot of space, you become more solitary. >> yeah, that's close to my theory. i think they were descendants of the donner party. [ laughter ] they're afraid of someone eating them. >> jimmy: that could be it, too. we'll really never have an answer to this question. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: do you do ranch-type stuff? are you out there, like, what goes on on a ranch? digging? do people dig there, whittling? >> oh, hell no. >> jimmy: nothing like that? >> no, when i go up there, i read books, i watch movies, we chill. there's not a lot to do. it's really, really beautiful in wyoming. just gorgeous. but not a lot of things to do. it's the least populated state in the union, so most people get
12:29 am
the hell out of wyoming. >> jimmy: right, yeah. >> it's really beautiful. >> jimmy: you have to be paired up to be in wyoming, unless you're living in cheyenne or something like that. >> right. >> jimmy: meet other people you could pair up with. >> you said it beautifully. >> jimmy: i feel like i figured everything out. >> you figured it out. it's really true. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: by the way, i want to point something out. you tweeted it. it's a medication sold in canada. it's called rupall. [ laughter ] can you sue them for this? >> no, but i'm told there is an anal option to this product. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's an allergy medication. it's been a little windy and i've been having some allergies. i thought might be, i don't know, do you want to try one of these? >> orally, do you want to take it orally? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: let's see, yeah, let's go with orally because it's -- i
12:30 am
don't have my pea shooter. [ laughter ] well, i'm going to try this. i'm going to try rupall and see what happens. >> do it. ♪ >> jimmy: wow, my allergies are gone and i look fabulous. rupaul's drag race returns to vh1 december 14th. we'll be back with phosphorescent. now sashay away. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. ♪
12:31 am
♪ connecting people... ...uniting the world. ♪♪
12:32 am
>> dicky: the jimmy kimmel live concert series is presented by mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. >> jimmy: i want to thank julie bowen, rupaul and kim kardashian west. apologies to matt damon. we ran out of time for him. "nightline" is next. but first, this is his album. it's called "c'est la vie." here with the new album, phosphorescent. [ cheers and applause ]
12:33 am
♪ ♪ ♪ i was sitting at a bar in new england ♪ ♪ i was thinking about another beer ♪ ♪ and a lady playing on the piano ♪ ♪ she said i like when you play that piano ♪ ♪ she just said, honey, what are you doing here ♪ ♪ i was sitting at a bar in new england ♪ ♪ i was thinking about another beer ♪ ♪ she said don't i know you honey don't i know you don't i know you ♪ ♪ it was the very first time i laid eyes on you ♪ ♪ that your mama burst into tears ♪
12:34 am
♪ and we were shaking in the medical basin ♪ ♪ i guess everything was on arears ♪ >> i was staring like a fool at the camera ♪ ♪ saying honey, what are you doing here ♪ ♪ it was the very first time i laid eyes on you, honey ♪ ♪ now your mama burst into tears ♪ ♪ i said, don't i know ya, honey, don't i know ya, honey, don't i know ya ♪ ♪ don't i know ya, honey don't i know ya, honey, don't i know ya ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ]
12:35 am
♪ i was sitting at a bar in new england ♪ ♪ i was thinking about another beer ♪ ♪ they had a lady playing on piano ♪ ♪ hey, i was liking how it goes in my ears ♪ ♪ i like how you play the piano ♪ ♪ she just said, honey, what are you doing here ♪ ♪ said i was sitting at a bar in new england ♪ ♪ i was thinking about another beer ♪ ♪ she said, don't i know ya honey, don't i know ya ♪ ♪ honey, don't i know ya
12:36 am
hey, don't i know ya ♪ ♪ honey, don't i know ya honey don't i know ya ♪ ♪ hey, don't i know ya honey, don't i know ya ♪ ♪ hey, don't i know ya, honey, don't i know ya, honey don't i know ya ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
12:37 am
[ cheers and applause ] this is "nightline." >> tonight, devil in disguise. >> i got a friend request from chris on facebook. he's the best thing that has ever happened to me. >> their seemingly perfect lives shared with the world. >> my daddy is a hero. >> cut short by chris watts, the man they trusted the most. >> how do you put someone you love into an oil tank? >> especially your children. >> now the parents of shannan watts speaking out for the first time about the colorado killer who murdered their pregnant daughter and two grandchildren. new body camera footage from the scene of the crime. inside his


info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on