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tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  October 14, 2014 12:36am-1:38am PDT

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ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] casey wilson, zach galifianakis. and the roots right there, ladies and gentlemen. from philadelphia. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. hope to see you tomorrow. bye-bye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- minnie driver -- from "the mindy project", actor/comedian,
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ike barinholtz -- music from florida georgia line -- featuring the 8g band with fred armisen. [ cheers and applause ] and now, here he is, seth meyers. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: good evening, everybody. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night." how's everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] great news. great news. also, welcome back, fred. [ cheers and applause ] >> fred: so happy to be here. >> seth: so glad to have you here. you like the new set? >> fred: i love it. it's great. >> seth: it's so great to have you here. it's been so long. we're so happy to have you back. it is an exciting day all around because today is columbus day. yeah. [ applause ] and in honor of columbus day, fred showed up out of nowhere and claimed the show belonged to him. [ laughter and applause ]
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this is interesting. a growing number of cities and states no longer recognize columbus day. they don't recognize it. it's slowly becoming the bruce jenner of holidays. [ laughter ] i thought columbus day -- it looks weird. i don't even recognize it anymore. like st. patrick's day, it's weird. this is surprising. north korean dictator kim jong-un, last week, missed, he missed a ceremony marking the 69th anniversary of the country. experts say it's especially strange because he knew cake would be there. [ laughter and applause ] weird. nobody knows where he is but the u.s. national security adviser says that there is no evidence that shows kim jong-un has been
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overthrown. if anything, he was probably just tipped over. [ laughter ] love going jong tipping. brings me back to high school. listen to this, john mccain said this weekend that there needs to be some sort of czar to deal with the ebola outbreak. an ebola czar. [ laughter ] so it turns out there's something you can put on your resume that's even worse than sandwich artist. [ laughter and applause ] not to cause a panic. it might be the same thing. [ laughter ] this is good news. a judge in alaska yesterday overturned the state ban on same-sex marriage. surprisingly progressive, yeah. yeah. [ cheers and applause ]
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crazy. and i have to say, surprisingly progressive for a state that won't even touch another state. [ laughter ] keep your distance, washington. that's right, they overturned the same-sex marriage ban in alaska which means alaskan gay couples can finally say, "i can see russia from our house." [ cheers and applause ] finally. they have as much right as anyone. i'm surprised to hear this. according to new estimates, adult halloween costumes will outsell kids' costumes by $320 million this year. yeah. even crazier, adult costumes use half the fabric. [ applause ] according to new reports, people living in more religious and conservative states are more likely to use the internet to
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search for pornography while people in -- [ cheer ] [ laughter ] do you feel a little on an island now, sir? did you maybe think that would be a collective reaction to that news? now you're, "oh, just me." people in conservative states are more likely to use the internet to search for pornography, while people in more liberal states have it as their home page. why waste time. you just have it there. there's a new poll out. we get very excited about new polls here. a new poll shows that 50% of americans think that the country is doing well. and 50% of american students think the country is doing good. [ laughter and applause ] i like this story. over the weekend a 113-year-old time capsule was found in boston.
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to give you an idea how long ago that was, the paper inside read "the yankees doth suck." [ applause ] this is great news. susan sarandon this week said, regarding her boyfriend, who's 31 years younger, that when you're in love, age, sex, and color no longer hold any importance. so if you're an old black woman with a crush on susan sarandon, sounds like you've got a shot. [ laughter and applause ] go for it. follow your heart. this is disturbing to me. police tracked down a burglar in the uk based on a dna sample found on a teddy bear he had sex with in a shed. [ light laughter ] my main question is, the man had sex with a teddy bear, how is he still referred to as a burglar? it's like calling shaq a rapper. [ light laughter ]
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the teddy bear sex immediately jumps ahead of burglar. and in a shed. didn't even do it in a nice room. [ laughter ] teddy bear. how dare you, sir? [ applause ] this is unbelievable. a 114-year-old woman had to lie about her age when she joined facebook this week because she was born five years before the oldest year available on the site. but then she had to close down her account because her mom joined. [ laughter and applause ] and finally, florida police are searching for the people who stole a truck filled with 18 tons of crisco. police have failed to apprehend the suspects despite catching them several times. ladies and gentlemen, this is the 8g band! ♪
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>> seth: so exciting. fred, welcome back. so happy to have you here. >> fred: so happy to be here. i really, listen, i really missed you. i missed doing this -- i watched the show every night. >> seth: thank you. >> fred: for real, i did. >> seth: that's so nice of you to say. >> fred: and doing the fred ex was such a crazy experience. because -- [ cheers ] like i didn't have an audience there to do it. i was in a trailer. it was just dead silent. and i was like -- should i even send this? so -- but it was all real, you know? i really got these fed exes. and saw these costumes for the first time. >> seth: it was great. you've been so busy and i'm so impressed by this. i mean, you've been gone a long time, and you're obviously doing "portlandia," and you still found time to do fred ex with us. [ cheers and applause ] but then, you know, i'm going to have to ask you about this other stuff i heard that you did while you were gone. >> fred: uh-huh.
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>> seth: is it true that you opened a summer camp? >> fred: yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: you did? >> fred: yeah. >> seth: tell me about it. >> fred: i opened a summer camp for cats. [ laughter ] and it's one where they can get just sort of visit the suburban chicago area. because -- a lot of animals don't get to see other cities, you know what i mean? like they sort of like -- they -- you know, they have their own -- they can't afford to just sort of travel, so they only know their own city. >> seth: so the camp looks like suburban chicago? >> fred: yes, but it's in suburban chicago. >> seth: oh, gotcha. i see, i see. >> fred: so we bring them out there and we just have them get to know the place and be there for the summer so they can like -- [ laughter ] you know, they don't get the chance in other cities, you know what i mean? so they can travel around. >> seth: do you think that memory stays with the cat at the end of the summer? do you think -- >> fred: it's so hard to tell. [ laughter ] know what i mean? and i trust that it's something, you know, i trust that they get something out of it. but yeah. >> seth: is it a camp in that --
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i mean, are there activities for the cats during the day? >> fred: yeah, we've got a bunch of jumping. a bunch of tunnels. a bunch of tunnels. carpet tunnels. and they're from all over the place, you know. from florida, england, we have a couple of cats from there. >> seth: wow. >> fred: all summer, yeah. >> seth: that's great. who are the counselors? >> fred: there's me and there's also older cats who are counselors. [ laughter ] put they're just a little more jaded and cool. >> seth: yeah. >> fred: you know and they guide them through. so yeah. >> seth: what's it called? >> fred: it's called fred the dog. [ laughter ] >> seth: not a good name. not a good name. i think it would be very important to get both "camp" or "cat" in the title. >> fred: right, right. now i know. >> seth: now you know. [ laughter ] i had a great welcome back once again, fred. give it up for fred armisen. [ cheers and applause ] >> fred: thank you. >> seth: i had a show saturday night in vegas. i had a lovely time. i did a show at the cosmopolitan in vegas on saturday night. and i did something i've never done.
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i went -- i got there saturday morning and then after my show, i jumped in a car and i went straight to the airport and i got the last flight out of vegas. which was the best ever. because i'm married now so there's no reason to stay in vegas. there's no reason. anything i would do in vegas would just be a bad thing to do. so it was so great to get -- because when you go at a time airport on saturday night in vegas, it's a ghost town. no one is leaving. no one is in vegas saying, let's get a jump on getting out of here. so it was -- i went to the airport, it was me and three other people. but we were so happy with ourselves. we were all -- we did it, we're so smart, we're getting out of vegas. i love vegas. it is so much better to get home in the morning. and the only downside of being in vegas is i was not able to be here for bill hader's triumphant return to "snl." i don't know if you saw saturday but -- [ cheers and applause ] excellent! excellent job. i was slightly heartbroken to see stefan with two other "weekend update" anchors. [ audience aws ]
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but that was always the deal when i married him. he was gonna see other people. that was always the deal. i knew what i was getting into when i married stefan. [ light laughter ] you guys, we have an excellent show for you tonight, from nbc's "about a boy" minnie driver is here. [ cheers and applause ] also stopping by from "the mindy project", the hilarious ike barinholtz will be joining us. [ cheers and applause ] and we'll have music from florida georgia line which will be outstanding. [ cheers and applause ] now, we do a lot of writing here at the show because if we didn't, we'd be paying a lot of people to do absolutely nothing. and the first draft of what we write is never the last. and that's true of all writers throughout history. here at "late night" we were lucky to get our hands on the first draft of some famous quotes in a segment we're calling, what else, "famous quotes, first draft." ♪ >> seth: let's start with vincent van gogh who said, if
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you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. let's see what he wrote for his first draft. if you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means cut your ear off and that voice will be silenced. [ laughter and applause ] you know, i bet van gogh was pretty bummed out when he cut off his ear and realized you could still hear. because the ear is purely ornamental. you gotta get rid of the eardrums. also, you got another ear. stupid painters. [ laughter ] next we have maya angelou. let's see what she had to say. "life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away." and the first draft was, "life is not measured by the number of breasts we take but -- did i say breasts? sorry, that was embarrassing. hold on a second. let me catch my breast -- my breath -- what's wrong with me today? tits." [ laughter and applause ] so weird. definitely -- definitely better rewrite. next we have william shakespeare who wrote, "neither a borrower
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nor a lender be." his first draft was slightly different. "neither a borrow are nor a lender be. also don't be a magician. your mother and i would be so disappointed if you became a magician." [ applause ] i get it. i get it, shakespeare. next we have queen elizabeth i. she said, "i would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married." the first draft is a little different. let's see it. "i'm a cat person." [ laughter and applause ] next up, wave got florence nightingale. she said, "i attribute my success to this. i never gave or took any excuse." let's see the first draft. "i attribute my success to this. people love bird names. larry bird, russell crowe, raven simone. i know none of these people have been born yet, but trust me." she's not wrong. she was not wrong. next, in honor of columbus day we have christopher columbus who said, "riches don't make a man rich, they only make him busier." let's check out the first draft. "riches don't make a man rich,
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they only make him busier, and when i told the natives that they actually believed me and that's how i got all their stuff." you're a bad guy. you're a bad guy, christopher columbus. real bad guy. next we have marilyn monroe who said, "if you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything." her first draft is a little different. let's see it. "if you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything, except for butt stuff. it's going to take diamonds for butt stuff." [ laughter and applause ] unless it's a diamond ring. then you don't get any stuff. next we've got buddha, our chubby little friend, who said, "health is the greatest gift. contentment, the greatest wealth. faithfulness, the best relationship." let's see the first draft. "health is the greatest gift. contentment the greatest health. faithfulness, the best relationship. and sierra mist, the most refreshing lemon lime carbonated beverage. sierra mist, find your flavor." [ applause ] i always forget buddha was a --
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for sierra mist. and finally we've got yogi berra, smartest man ever, who said "half this game is 90% mental." let's see the first draft. "half this soup is 90% lentil. i hate when it that happens." this has been "famous quotes first draft." we'll be right back with minnie driver! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ glade scents evoke the most beautiful feelings. they can inspire and exhilarate. make you smile. calm you down. . what will glade inspire in you?
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back to "late night," everybody. our first guest is a talented actress and singer whose third album "ask me to dance" is available now. you can also see her in the hit nbc show "about a boy" which has its season premiere tomorrow night. let's take a look. [ crying ] >> will? will is here! >> what are you doing here? >> mom, cut my umbilical cord so i can hug will. >> umbilical cord? what? >> don't get judgmental. we are simply re-enacting marcus' birth. >> oh, and here i was thinking there was no logical explanation. [ laughter ] >> seth: ladies and gentlemen, minnie driver!
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: thank you so much for being here. >> aw, thanks for having me. >> seth: you look lovely. congratulations on everything. >> thank you very much. was it quite hard for you to say nbc's hit show "about a boy"? >> seth: oh, i always -- after nbc's i always say "hit." [ laughter ] it's in my contract. >> mine too. >> seth: welcome to nbc's hit commentary. try the chicken. [ laughter ] i have to ask, i have to ask about your album "ask me to dance." where do you come up with a title like "ask me to dance"? >> so, when i was young, i was very tall very young. at every school dance, i used to stand on the sidelines and it was the mantra that i had going -- "ask me to dance, ask me to dance, ask me to dance, ask me to dance." and they never did because i was so bloody tall and i looked a bit like slash. [ laughter ]
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i had mad hair. i wouldn't have asked me to dance either probably. >> seth: you know what? it's funny because the irony is, of course, you weren't helping by muttering "ask me to dance." [ laughter ] that was really the third strike. >> a mad 13-year-old. >> seth: someone was hoping to ask that tall slash girl to dance and then they got close and heard you muttering and then, "well, you know what? never mind." >> forget it. [ laughter ] but they were always -- they were always at boob level. where you'd think a 13-year-old boy would want to be. >> seth: yeah. >> but apparently not. >> seth: it's the dream. it's the dream. [ laughter ] >> no, not now, then. >> seth: yeah, that's true. it's still not the worst place to be. [ laughter ] >> i guess for them it was scary to be short and at boob level. >> seth: yeah, that's probably a lot. well, look. i was there, i was 13. i didn't have a great time. [ laughter ] what -- your first two albums were original songs. this is covers. how do you pick the songs you wanted to have on an album like this? >> i think to -- i didn't know before we started that karaoke means "empty orchestra" in japanese. and that is true. >> seth: wow.
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>> we wanted to make the antithesis of that. it's hard to take someone else's songs. you can do a good version, but it can sound a bit like karaoke. so, you have to connect it back to something meaningful in your life. >> seth: all right. >> so, all of the songs -- in the liner notes of the record, they all connect to a particular story. like, on "waltz number 2" which is the first song on the record, elliot smith wrote all of the music for "good will hunting" and we became friends after that. and i was going out with a drummer at the time that he was making his record. and this drummer was tracking drums at sunset sound. tracking drums is the most boring thing. no offense. but it's just -- boom. boom. boom. >> seth: that doesn't sound boring. >> it's for hours. for an hour and a half you'll be doing a kick drum. so i wandered out and wandered down the corridors of sunset sound. elliot was recording. as i walked in, he was stacking vocals for "waltz number 2." and it was like a wall of sound
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that i walked into and he, who was not the lightest creature ever, was at his lightest and most happy. and it was a beautiful -- it was a beautiful thing to see. and that song, me doing his song, is just a complete ode to a friendship that wasn't long enough. >> seth: that's lovely. and then you have a version of "fly me to the moon." >> yes. >> seth: which is famously known for the frank sinatra version. yours is very different than the frank sinatra version. >> it is. it's my -- when my mom and my dad met, that song was playing. and my mom is here tonight. she's my montourage backstage. >> seth: oh, your montourage. that's great. [ cheers and applause ] sorry, your hit mom. >> my hit mom. my hit mom is backstage. apparently, my dad gave her after this date, he gave her a little suitcase with a record player in it with the 7-inch single version of "fly me to the moon." so, this is an incredibly romantic story. as a kid, i used to imagine what
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the song sounded like. like, i never heard it because no one played sinatra in my house. i don't know why. >> seth: especially since they had it. [ laughter ] >> i think my mom had broken it by that point. difficult man. but when i did hear it, i was like, how can this gin soaked swing record be the romantic uber love song that i've imagined it to be? so, the way we do it on the record is my 9-year-old version. >> seth: got it. >> which is outright bass and trumpet and very stripped down and slowed down. >> seth: that's exciting. >> i like it. >> seth: that's great. you have a 6-year-old? >> yes. >> seth: excited for halloween? >> very. halloween's a big -- he's odd. >> seth: well, i'm -- [ laughter ] i have proof. like, physical proof of his -- i'm not going to say odd. i'm going to say unique? >> he's unique and he has eccentric choices in things that catch his eye. >> seth: so, last year -- why don't you say who he dressed like and then i'll show them the picture. >> so, last year we were looking through and art book and he saw a picture of a guy and he went, "who's that?
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i gotta be him." and it was salvador dali. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: that's so great. it's so great. i will say once you see a kid doing salvador dali, like, it seems like a really fun thing for a kid to do. i'm surprised you don't see more dali. >> yeah, he did lots of that and no one knew who he was. >> seth: i saw it before i heard it was salvador dali and i thought zorro. >> but i think it was -- that was the only costume i could find. >> seth: so, you bought zorro. >> i bought zorro and just put a moustache on him. [ laughter ] >> seth: that makes a lot more sense now than going to a halloween store and going, "do you have salvador dali for a 6-year-old? not an 8, it's a 6." [ laughter ] on your -- on "about a boy" you play a sort of strange mother, as evidenced by the clip. you are a vegan on the show. in real life, you are a selective vegetarian? >> i'm a selective vegetarian. it makes perfect sense to me,
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but i only -- i eat animals that i don't really like. >> seth: right. [ laughter ] >> like, i grew up -- i didn't -- i didn't like getting my ankles pecked by chickens and turkeys. i actively disliked it. and i'm happy to eat them. [ laughter ] i can't eat pigs though. >> seth: you can't eat a pig? >> no, can't eat a pig. >> seth: did you have like good interactions with them growing up? >> love, they're clever, they're smart, they're much like dogs. i have nothing against sheep. >> seth: gotcha. >> i don't have a whole lot against cows. >> seth: so, it seems as though poultry is really where -- >> poultry's where the problem lies. >> seth: poultry who ran afoul. [ laughter ] where were they pecking you on the ankles? what part of your upbringing was this? >> do you know, we -- well first of all, we lived in the country quite a lot and there were a fair few chickens around. there were chickens at my school. did you did something bad, you'd have to go and feed the chickens and the turkeys without wearing wellington boots. >> seth: wow. oh, my goodness, so the punishment was no boots feeding
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chickens? >> the punishment was getting pecked. >> seth: wow. [ laughter ] >> it worked. >> seth: not getting asked to dance now seems like the least worst thing that happened to you. [ laughter ] your next album should be called "please don't send me out to the chickens." thank you so much for being here. minnie driver, everybody! the second season of "about a boy" premieres tomorrow night at 9:30 on nbc. we'll be right back with ike barinholtz! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ forget about fingers and toes. i'm here to talk about bums. how do you look after your bum? (woman laughs nervously) i use wipes and toilet paper on a normal basis. why? because you feel cleaner. i don't know what that is. are those the... these are wipes. you can't have one without the other. bonnie and clyde. they go together. would you use these?
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back, everyone. our next guest is a tremendously funny actor who can regularly be seen on "the mindy project." it airs tuesday nights on fox. let's take a look. >> i don't want to live in a world where a rude schlub like peter can lose his woman to a handsome, decent man. >> i know! >> and i don't want to work for the place where dr. c has to hide his man thong in his drawer. >> a man thong? >> this is a men's thong. look at the pouch right here. where the weiner would go. >> oh. >> seth: please welcome back to the show my good friend ike barinholtz!
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[ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: hi, buddy. >> hi, friend. woo! so good to see you. >> seth: woo, wow! >> hi, fred. hi, welcome back. you got fred. >> seth: you came here on unafred. it's so good to see you. >> yes. >> seth: i missed you so much now you're in l.a. i don't see you enough. >> whoo! >> seth: you -- i saw you once this summer. >> yeah. >> seth: because you were working with our friends amy and tina in a movie called "the nest." >> yeah. we did that. [ cheers and applause ] whoa! >> seth: nest heads. we got a bunch of nest heads in the house. >> it comes out like, wow, wow. comes out like in 18 months, i think. >> seth: you got to work with my old partner in crime amy poehler. >> yes, yes. [ cheers and applause ]
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yes, she is lovely. >> seth: yep. >> i was actually her boyfriend. >> seth: oh that's exciting. >> yeah. it was fun. she's a very pretty, attractive woman. and i am a monster. [ laughter ] so i have to kind of -- >> seth: but you were in great shape. >> i got in good shape. which means you can't make fun of me anymore for being fat. >> seth: no, i would never. >> you have before. last time i was here you said -- i looked like daniel craig and pierce brosnan stuffed in the same suit. [ laughter ] >> seth: now you look lovely. >> thank you what are you going to make fun of me for? i think you don't have anything. >> seth: it looks like you shave with a razor without any blades. [ laughter ] the most open your eyes have ever been is a little bit open. [ laughter ] the top and bottom of your pupils have never seen the sun. [ laughter ] >> that hurts. that hurts deep, man. he found a way. >> seth: we got through it. >> we got through it, thank you. >> seth: did you enjoy working with poehler?
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>> yes, she's the best, she's the best. we did this really funny bit, we kind of created, like we'd make fun of like topical stuff and we'd be like, for real? we'd be like, you know -- like isis, for real? isis, that's your name, for real? >> seth: sounds a lot like, really? a think i did with amy called "really?" [ cheers and applause ] >> no, no. >> seth: it's not different enough. >> we never said "really." we were like "for real?" >> seth: i don't think -- >> she wouldn't do it with me, i would do it to her. [ light laughter ] she'd be like -- so i guess maybe it is the same thing. >> seth: you -- there was a big -- the night we saw your shooting a big party scene in the movie. >> yes, yes. >> seth: and you -- because i used to stay at the house. you were my brother's roommate. >> camp hollywood. >> seth: camp hollywood. you'd have crazy parties. >> yes. >> seth: one time you called the cops on your own party. >> i did, i did. it was getting late. it was getting out of control. there were too many people there. so i kind of stepped aside and i called the police. i was like, "yeah, there's a huge party at blank blank, north -- you've got to shut it down."
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they came like within ten minutes. and i was like, "oh, come on man! come on, guys, i'm sorry, pigs, right?" [ laughter ] you know? get them out of here. so, yeah. i ruin mid own party. i stand by it. >> seth: you stand by the decision. halloween party coming up? not doing it anymore? >> i'm at the age now, i just got to the age where i hate halloween. [ light laughter ] like i think like 36, 37 is like -- it's over. for married people on halloween. >> seth: yeah. >> it's terrible. >> seth: but you did last year? was that -- >> the last time i dressed up was two years ago. my wife and i went to this big fancy hollywood party. i don't want to say who it was. adam levine. [ cheers and applause ] i've never met him. i don't talk to him. i don't know him. but i said to my wife, let's go as "game of thrones" characters, right? great show, yes? [ cheers and applause ] got some thrones heads here. >> seth: got some thrones heads. "game of thrones" is right under "the nest," as far as what they are excited about. >> wow, that's great. haven't even come out yet. i was going to be
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brienne of tarth. big female knight. and my wife was going to be jamie lannister because they had a story right? >> seth: gender roles. >> flipped them. >> seth: classic comedy on halloween. >> you know, it's just whatever. >> seth: right. >> so i got these amazing costumes at the university studios wardrobe department, you can rent whatever you want. i went all-out on my costume and phoned in hers. >> seth: what's phoned in hers mean? >> for me i have a suit of armor and a sword and a wig. for her i just gave her rags. [ light laughter ] just like drew a beard on her face. and she's pissed off. >> seth: yeah. >> because we got there and no one knew who we were. oh, king henry viii and a hobo, here we go. [ laughter ] like, wow. and like, look at how angry, very not happy and angry to be there. >> seth: you -- not great party stories from you. but when we come back, we're going to talk about my emmy party you came to and i think you nailed that one. >> oh, thank you, yes. i really blew it. >> seth: more from ike barinholtz after this!
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back to "late night." here with my friend ike barinholtz. so, you came to my emmy party, it was after the emmys.
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>> great job. >> seth: thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] i so happy to see you at the party. but it turns out you'd maybe been there for a bit. >> well, well, i texted some friends of mine who were going to the party, oh, yeah, we're on the way, 10:30. i never want to be early. i brought my brother john with me. and we rolled up. we looked good. literally no one there. the staff was just trickling in even. but, we're like, you know what whatever man, let's own this. confidently walked in, grabbed drinks, sat down. like "entourage." cheers, bro. cheers, drama, or whatever. as we sat down the security guard's like, "you guys check in." he walked us out of the party. so, we had to show them our i.d.s. so, we went back, basically the first ones there twice. [ laughter ] it's so shameful. >> seth: at the time i drove up you knew all the staff. you knew their back stories. >> like one of them is going to stand up at my wedding. they're really great people and they worked really hard that night. >> seth: last time we were here we talked a little bit about your daughter foster.
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she's doing great. you showed me a little walking video. >> yeah, she's walking and stuff, talking. she just watched ken burns' "the roosevelts." >> seth: oh, wow, she's really growing up fast. >> really fast. >> seth: very smart girl. >> yeah very smart, very smart. >> seth: and she loves her dad. >> she loves her dad. at home. you know, and i'm obsessed with her, pictures, blah, blah, blah. and i go to work, oh my god, my daughter's so cute -- then mindy kaling who i work with. [ cheers and applause ] yes, yes. she had like this big barbecue. and i rolled up with my daughter, so excited to show my co-workers the love that my daughter has for me. >> seth: right. >> and we walked in. and she looked at me as if i took her from a shopping cart. [ laughter ] she was so like -- like ah! then my wife wasn't helping because she was like, "foster you love daddy." like i'm some absentee father. [ laughter ] yeah, you have pictures of this. this is from the day. >> seth: this is from the barbecue and this is her not looking that psyched. >> first of all, look at my nipple game.
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it's on point. >> seth: i will say, were you the only person there without a shirt on? [ laughter ] because she might just be developing dad shame. [ laughter ] >> looks like she is terrified of like greek fishermen or something. [ laughter ] oh, god, yeah. >> seth: "mindy," congrats on, what are we talking, season three? >> season three. thank you. >> seth: more people recognize you for the show now? >> yeah, used to just be young girls. now it's middle-aged bros. [ laughter ] >> seth: okay. >> like i'll be at the airport and i'll see a chubby dude, university of texas shirt. he's like, what's up, bro? [ laughter ] i like that indian girl show. i'm like, that's not the name of it. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. >> but it might be in china. it might be called "the indian girl show." [ laughter ] but yeah, bros are now -- we're starting to dip into the bro demographic. >> seth: that's very exciting. they watch a lot of tv. >> it's a good demographic. they watch tv and drink a lot of beer. which is good. >> seth: your brother, also a very funny comedian, john barinholtz. >> yes. >> seth: he's doing a web series
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you're directing. you never directed before. >> never directed before. me and dave statson my friend are co-directing. it's this thing called "pie guys" on comedy central. and it takes place at a pizzeria. and you know i like to eat. >> seth: you like your pizza. >> i have a problem with food. so we're on set and i was in it. i played the police officer in it. i was just nonstop eating pizza. and we went to the editing bay. and my image first shows up. dave statson our friend goes, i think it was great that you decided to play the part as a cop that was pulled out of a river because you're so bloated. [ laughter ] and i was like, how is this a comedy central roast of me? i'm supposed to be working. >> seth: you're the director, you're supposed to be in charge. >> yeah, like mel gibson in "brave heart," i directed myself, just for a web series, and i like to eat, leave me alone. >> seth: you --i remember this, you and dave are both guilty of this, when i used to live with you guys over the summers, if there was an ad for a new fast food sandwich, i would look over and you would be gone.
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[ laughter ] >> it would -- >> seth: you would already be in your car. >> it would be like a cartoon where the outline of our body is still there. i remember one time i was talking to you and it was like a commercial for like the wendy's triple stacker came on. and like you turned and i was already out the door. >> seth: yes. it was always the same thing which is you would then drive back, you would have already eaten in the car. >> yeah, yeah. >> seth: you would just be sad. >> depressed, like it wasn't that good. [ laughter ] >> seth: what am my doing? >> oh, my life sucks. i'm a sad man. >> seth: but you're also now you work for michelin reviewing five-star restaurants. is this true? >> don't like the michelin man, work for michelin. work for me. wendy's triple stacker, i give it three smacks. [ laughter ] >> seth: it's such a delight to have you back here. >> one more, ready? oh! yeah! [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: ike barinholtz everybody. check out "the mindy project" tuesday nights on fox. we'll be right back with music from the florida georgia line.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back to "late night." tonight's musical guests record-breaking, platinum-selling smash "cruise" spent 24 weeks at number 1, became the best selling country digital song of all-time and made them a household name. they just released their highly anticipated sophomore album "anything goes." and here to perform their number 1 hit, "dirt," please welcome, florida georgia line. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ you get your hands in it plant your roots in it dusty headlight dance with your boots in it ♪
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♪ you write her name on it spin your tires on it build your cornfield whiskey bonfires on it ♪ ♪ you bet your life on it ♪ it's that elm shade redrust clay you grew up on that plowed up ground that your dad damned ♪ ♪ his luck on that postgame party field you circle up on and when it rains you get stuck on ♪ ♪ drift a cloud back behind county roads that you run up the mud on her jeans that she peeled off and hung up ♪ ♪ her blue eye'd summertime smile looks so good that it hurts makes you wanna build ♪ ♪ a 10 percent down white picket fence house on this dirt ♪ ♪ you've mixed some sweat with it taken a shovel to it
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you've stuck some crosses ♪ ♪ and some painted goalposts through it you know you came from it and someday ♪ ♪ you'll return to this ♪ it's that elm shade redrust clay you grew up on that plowed up ground that your dad damned ♪ ♪ his luck on that postgame party field you circle up on and when it rains you get stuck on ♪ ♪ drift a cloud back behind county roads that you run up the mud on her jeans that she peeled off and hung up ♪ ♪ her blue eye'd summertime smile looks so good that it hurts makes you wanna build ♪ ♪ a 10 percent down white picket fence house on this dirt ♪ ♪ ♪ you know you came from it
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and someday you'll return to this ♪ ♪ it's that elm shade redrust clay you grew up on that plowed up ground that your dad damned ♪ ♪ his luck on that postgame party field you circle up on and when it rains you get stuck on ♪ ♪ drift a cloud back behind county roads that you run up the mud on her jeans that she peeled off and hung up ♪ ♪ her blue eye'd summertime smile looks so good that it hurts makes you wanna build ♪ ♪ a 10 percent down white picket fence house on this dirt ♪ ♪ makes you wanna build a 10 percent down white picket fence house on this dirt ♪ ♪ ♪ you know you came from it
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and someday you'll return to it ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: florida georgia line! for tour dates, go to and be sure to head over to for an exclusive performance of the title track off their brand new album, "anything goes." we'll be right back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ whatta you wanna do first?
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eat the chick-n-tater melt? or peel the sticker and play jack's munchie peel instant win game? what happens if i peel the sticker? you have a 1 in 4 chance of winning cool stuff like flights on southwest airlines,
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through covered california. soon, you can join them. ♪ >> seth: my thanks to minnie driver, ike barinholtz, florida georgia line, and of course the 8g band. stay tuned for carson daly. we'll see you tomorrow! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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♪ >> carson: well, good evening everybody, welcome to queen of the night here at the paramount hotel, i'm carson daly. this is "last call" tonight. indie rock royalty graces your screen as "interpol" performs from fox theater pomona. also on our "spotlight" tonight, film maker jake paltrow is gonna tell you all about "young ones." but we're gonna start things off with the former "state" cast member tunred comedic leading man, ken marino is here to talk about his new starring role in the new nbc sitcom "marry me." and for more, we go to stk in west hollywood, take a look. ♪ >> what would you like me to do to promote "marry me"?


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