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tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  May 5, 2015 11:34pm-12:37am PDT

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finally, tonight sheriff's deputies in arizona, have a bone to pick with someone. tourists reported seeing human remains while scuba diving. what they found was a lot more amusing. two fake skeletons sitting in lawn chairs p. one diver described it as an underwater tea party. ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his guests --
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sofia vergara, james marsden, musical guest fetty wap, and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 256, muscle shoals! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that makes me feel good. oh, i send the love right back to you guys. welcome, welcome, welcome to "the tonight show," everybody. you're here. you made it. [ cheers and applause ] got a big show. they're all in the party mood.
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i want to wish everybody a a happy cinco de mayo, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ happy cinco de mayo! everybody's celebrating cinco de mayo. in fact, earlier, i saw floyd mayweather and manny pacquiao pretending to hit a pinata. more like hugging it. but still -- it was worth it, it was worth it. yeah, yeah, yeah. it was great. [ applause ] it was the best. it was the best. today is cinco de mayo. though, if you're really excited by that, the chances of you being at home watching "the tonight show" right now are pretty slim. [ laughter ] i saw that taco bell -- we love taco bell. they celebrated cinco de mayo by giving away free biscuit tacos between 7:00 and 11:00 this morning. [ cheers ] of course, giving away free food makes them look good, but they're also smart enough to do it when they know stoners are asleep. no one's gonna show up between 7:00 and 11:00. come on. are we going to get up for a a taco? no. [ light laughter ] actually, when they heard taco
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bell was celebrating cinco de mayo by giving out food between 7:00 and 11:00, stoners were like, "wait, 7-eleven's giving out sinks full of mayo? [ laughter ] let's go, dude!" some political news here. another person has announced they're running for president. this time, it's former arkansas governor mike huckabee. yeah. [ laughter ] woo! you can feel the excitement. >> steve: yeah, electric! >> jimmy: the floor's shaking, yeah. the room's shaking. get this, i read that he actually played in a rock band called capital offense. [ laughter ] not to be confused with jeb bush, who recently joined a a mariachi band. [ laughter ] delito capital! oh, this is pretty impressive here. bernie sanders's presidential campaign announced that it raised over $1.5 million in the 24 hours after he announced his
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bid. meanwhile, a 12-year-old on kickstarter just raised $7 million in the last five minutes after announcing his idea for juicebox water guns. [ laughter ] [ applause ] it's big news for the sanders campaign. but when it comes down to campaigns and how much they cost, $1.5 million, it doesn't really buy you that much really. i mean, just take a look at the ad they just released. ♪ >> i'm bernie sanders -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you kind of get the gist, i think. this is kind of crazy, but while bernie sanders runs for president here in the u.s., he actually has an older brother running for parliament in the u.k. can we see bernie sanders again? [ laughter ] how much older can his brother be? [ laughter ] who is he, gandalf? [ laughter ] some tv news here. nbc has adopted netflix's strategy for its latest summer tv series "aquarius", and will release all 13 episodes the
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same night it premieres. seems ridiculous to me. i can't imagine nbc ever using the netflix format. i mean, how could it work? skip to the next episode? i love netflix, but i just don't see that working for nbc. this is pretty interesting. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] according to a new survey, men and women prefer having sex at opposite times of the day. [ light laughter ] that's right. researchers say that men prefer the morning, while women prefer not now. [ laughter ] [ applause ] different times. different times. >> steve: different times. >> jimmy: oh, i was watching "dancing with the stars." do you guys watch "dancing with the stars"? [ applause ] you know how the judges always go crazy and stuff like that? that's what they do. i love bruno and all those guys. but bruno really seemed to be taking it to another level. check this out. >> okay. all right. calm down. >> what's happening? [ screaming ]
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[ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. no more bath salts for bruno. [ laughter ] that's just too much. that's the thing. learn a lesson. this is interesting news. i heard that loose wrangler jeans are slowly making a a comeback, because people aren't buying skinny jeans any more. too tight. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: they don't like the tight pants. >> steve: no. >> jimmy: no. wrangler is using the slogan, "life is comfortable." which beats the other slogan, "because you like bread." [ laughter ] bread is good. bread is delicious. >> steve: bread is good. >> jimmy: bread is delicious. and get this, i read that as marijuana legalization becomes more popular, it could actually affect the jobs of drug sniffing dogs. or as those dogs put it, "thanks, bo obama." [ laughter ] that's right. as more places legalize weed, some police departments are retiring their drug- sniffing dogs. but don't worry, the retired dogs have already been adopted by stoners who forget where
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they put their weed. [ laughter ] come on, girl. i know i had a roach here somewhere. timmy's in trouble. timmy's in trouble! we have a great show. give it up for the roots, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome, everybody. thank you so much for watching. thank you for being here. happy cinco de mayo. we have a big week of shows ahead. kerry washington, jesse tyler ferguson, jane fonda, and sean "diddy" combs will all be joining us. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: wow! >> jimmy: then on friday -- i'm so excited for this. we're doing an entire show with u2. that's what i'm talking about. [ cheers and applause ] that's right. we're gonna talk to those guys, talk to bono. because they were supposed to come here, then bono fell off a a bicycle. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: and, like, really messed up. >> steve: really messed himself up.
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>> jimmy: yeah, so we're going to finally get to the bottom of that. talk to him, see how he's doing. then they're going to play a a new song, "song for someone." which is a beautiful song. and then -- >> steve: for who? >> jimmy: what's that? >> steve: who is it for? >> jimmy: our show. >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: they'll play "song for someone." >> steve: who? >> jimmy: what's that? u2. >> steve: who's the song for? >> jimmy: someone. congratulations. [ laughter ] congratulations, man. [ applause ] they watch the show. they might do one of their -- let's see if we can get one of their old hits, too. one of their classics to jam out to. because they're really an amazing rock band. if you ever see them live, get a chance, they're going on the world tour. anyway, they're here friday. you don't even have to go to the tour. you can just watch from home. of course, going there live would be better. but, yeah, watch and get a a taste of how amazing they are. u2 will be here on friday. i'm psyched. [ applause ] but first, we have a fantastic show tonight. tonight is the show to be at. >> steve: yeah! >> jimmy: this is it. [ cheers and applause ] we love her. we love it when she stops by. from "modern family" and the new movie "hot pursuit,"
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sofia vergara is here. >> steve: oh! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: ooh-la-la! >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: woo! later in the show, sofia and i are playing a game of "catchphrase" with some special guests. it's gonna be fun. plus, this guy is great. he co-stars with jack black in the new film "the d-train." james marsden is dropping in. [ cheers and applause ] he's a good guy. and we have music from fetty wap, everybody. fetty wap. [ cheers and applause ] "trap queen." fetty wap. oh, guys, we have to talk about this. i'm so excited about this. our producer of our show, very talented guy. a very funny human being. you've know him for a long time. >> steve: yeah. i've known him for years and years. >> jimmy: josh lieb, he's written a book. another book. >> steve: his first book, i loved. >> jimmy: his first book is "i am a genius of unspeakable evil and i want to be your class president." >> steve: yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that was the first book. a "new york times" best seller.
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it was just great and super funny. he has a new book, came out today. so we're all buzzing around the office. "ratscaliber" is the name of the book. [ applause ] >> steve: yeah! it's good, it's brilliant. it's about, like, a seventh grader who gets bit by an old rat, and the boy turns into a a rat, and then he pulls a a spork out of an old scone -- >> steve: uh-huh. >> jimmy: and it's -- the spork is ratscaliber. so now, he has to defend all his rat friends and he's also a a seventh grader and doesn't really know how to be a rat. it's just -- it's brilliantly funny. anyways, get it right now. pick it up in your book store. [ cheers and applause ] "ratscaliber." super proud of josh lieb. he's awesome, man. he deserves it. guys, it's time to take a look at the stories making headlines today and weigh the good with the bad. it's time for "pros and cons." ♪ pros and cons and pros and cons and pros ♪ >> jimmy: tonight, we'll be taking a look at the pros and cons of mother's day. hi, mom. i love you, mom. that counts as a gift. [ laughter ] this sunday is mother's day, everybody. so if you didn't get a present, go get it. it's time to celebrate all the
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moms out there, we love ya. let's take a look at the pros and cons of mother's day. here we go. pro -- spending quality time together with no fighting. con -- or as mayweather and pacquiao call that, boxing. [ laughter ] very interesting. >> steve: worth it. >> jimmy: worth it. >> steve: that was so worth it. >> jimmy: that was so worth it. >> steve: to see love like that. >> jimmy: that was so worth it, man. it really was. [ laughter ] sorry, kids, you can't eat for a week. daddy's gotta watch two guys hug for half an hour. [ laughter ] here we go. pro -- texting your mom "i love you." con -- your mom texting back "who dis?" [ laughter ] it's me. pro -- telling your mother she's unique and special. con -- finding the right card in the gas station to say that. hey, come on. put a little thought into it. pro -- tracing your hands with a a marker on a homemade card. >> steve: aw. >> jimmy: con -- then going back to your job as vice president of the united states. [ applause ]
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it's a talent. it looks like a turkey. >> steve: it's a gift. >> jimmy: it looks like a a turkey. >> steve: yeah. looks exactly like a turkey. that's a gift. pro -- it really doesn't matter what kind of present you get your mom. con -- as long as it costs more than what your brothers and sisters bought. that's important. [ applause ] you have to do that. yeah. pro -- hiring a cleaning lady to give your mom the day off. that's nice. con -- so, basically, just making someone else's mom work on mother's day. [ applause ] that's pretty cruel. not cool, dude. pro -- buying your mom the apple watch. con -- spending the entire summer teaching her how to use it. [ laughter ] no, mom, no. >> steve: hello. >> jimmy: mom? >> steve: hello? >> jimmy: mom? >> steve: hey, hey, hello. >> jimmy: hi. >> steve: hey. >> jimmy: i'm going to hang up the phone and just talk to you through the watch. okay? >> steve: okay. he told me to hang up the phone and he's gonna talk to me through my watch. >> jimmy: don't hang up the watch, though, mom. >> steve: he's gonna say something i can't hear --
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>> jimmy: mom, don't hang up the watch. >> steve: i gotta hang up the watch. >> jimmy: mom, no. don't hang up the watch. >> steve: hello? >> jimmy: don't hang up -- >> steve: hello. >> jimmy: mom? >> steve: hello? >> jimmy: dad? [ laughter ] dad -- >> steve: huh? >> jimmy: put the watch back on mom's -- >> steve: he said i'm supposed to watch mom. >> jimmy: no, no. [ beep ] >> steve: hey, hello. >> jimmy: hi, who's this? >> hey, what's -- who's this? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you called my watch, man. >> steve: oh, yeah. did you know there's tubs of mayonnaise at 7-eleven? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, i heard that. talk to you later, bye. mom, i love you. >> steve: woo! [ applause ] >> jimmy: pro -- you'll never see so many happy, smiling moms in one day. con -- unless you go to a a michael buble concert. [ light laughter ] there you go. and finally, pro -- giving mom the one thing she wants more than anything else in this world. con -- for you to friend her on facebook. there you go. [ cheers and applause ] that's the "pros and cons." we'll be right back with sofia vergara, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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but this morning, a city i've never been to felt like one i already knew. i just wanted to thank you for sharing your world with me. it felt like home. airbnb. belong anywhere.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest stars in the five-time emmy award winning comedy series "modern family." that's a funny show. it airs wednesdays at 9pm on abc. you can also see her alongside reese witherspoon in the new movie "hot pursuit" in theaters everywhere this friday. please welcome the lovely sofia vergara, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about right there. oh! sofia! >> hello. >> jimmy: sofia. >> oh i just went -- i was thinking now i was watching you on the monitor in my little dressing room? >> jimmy: yeah it was big enough. [ laughter ] normal size. >> it's okay. >> jimmy: no offense.
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[ laughter ] >> and but it just -- you invited me here because it's cinco de mayo? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's a tradition every cinco de mayo. >> you do know i am not mexican. i would love to be mexican, but you do know i am not mexican. >> jimmy: everybody is mexican on cinco de mayo, sofia vergara. [ laughter ] don't you know that? [ cheers and applause ] cinco de mayo! woo, woo, woo! you look gorgeous. >> gracias. >> jimmy: you got so much going on. wait, are you getting a star on the hollywood -- >> i am getting a star on thursday. i could not believe it. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: you excited? >> i know. >> jimmy: isn't that exciting? >> i don't even know what to say. i don't even know, i am like speechless because i thought that that -- they would give it to like, you know, super like famous people in hollywood. and i've only been in for six years and with "modern family." so, i thank "modern family." i called the ed o'neill. my partner in "modern family." >> jimmy: you call him the ed o'neill? [ laughter ] >> i call him -- let me tell you the story.
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>> jimmy: sorry. [ laughter ] >> i call ed. i got a star. he's like, "what? why so soon?" [ laughter ] huh? i'm like, "what do you mean?" he's like, yeah, because he's got his like two years ago. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you know where it's actually being placed, do you know what street or no? >> i don't know. i think actually i was worried. who knows where they were going to put me. >> jimmy: could be anywhere, yeah. >> near an alley or something. >> jimmy: no, no, no, no. >> near a taco stand. >> jimmy: no, that's not true. [ laughter and applause ] you don't eat tacos. >> i eat tacos. i love tacos. >> jimmy: everybody eats tacos on cinco de mayo. >> i love chicken tacos. i was eating a chicken taco now actually in the little dressing room. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh it's big enough to fit a chicken taco in there. >> no, but it was very, very funny. and i think they're going to put me next to a -- i think. i don't know where, i don't care. i don't care where they put me. just put me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: so that you just, what do you do there? you just unveil it. you don't put your hand there anymore.
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>> i think they don't do it anymore. i got a little disappointed because that's like a fun thing. it looked fun. >> jimmy: to put your hand in cement? >> yes. >> jimmy: you can always do that on the weekend. [ laughter ] >> yeah? >> jimmy: yeah, if you think it's fun, go for it, man. >> then they'll put me in jail. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: don't do it on the sidewalk. just do it in your backyard or something. i don't know. >> it will be super exciting. >> jimmy: it's going to be and then even more exciting, how, we have you, i mean i thought we were friends here. >> no. >> jimmy: no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: but you come on the show and there's rumors that you're dating joe - - >> no rumors. i am. >> jimmy: well this last time -- >> you see me everywhere in pictures. how can those be rumors? >> jimmy: no, but it was rumors the last time you were here. >> oh, okay. i not letting you speak. okay. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, but it turns out it wasn't even rumors then. but that's how nice i was, i didn't bring it up. now, let's see that rock, man. >> you like it? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oo-la-la. la-misto. oh, la-ya-ya-yi-ya-ya-yo.
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wow. >> he knew what i needed to be happy. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. here you guys are last night at the met ball. looking just sharp. >> ah, look at that. >> jimmy: that's a studly couple right there. come on. >> can i take this afterwards? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, you like that photo? >> yeah. >> jimmy: you both look great. he's a great guy. >> now so hard to get like a a printed photo. everything is like in the phone and you don't get to put anything at home in your -- >> jimmy: this is yours. you can have this. >> thank you, thank you. >> jimmy: this is for you. yeah. >> jimmy: where did you guys meet, you and joe? >> we were seeing each other a a couple of times in los angeles, but from far away. i was with someone. and so we met actually like -- actually had like a tiny little conversation at the white house correspondents dinner last year in may. >> jimmy: yeah, i actually have a photo of you guys at the -- >> oh, come on. >> jimmy: i'll start on this side and slowly pan over to when we finally reveal joe. can we do that? there's jesse tyler ferguson. >> yeah. and photo qualadoor. >> jimmy: and you guys are
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talking, having a good time. let's just pan over there, the beautiful sofia. and then who's behind the sofia? hey, now. [ laughter ] hey! [ applause ] hey! yeah yeah yeah, yo, yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> i told him when i started talking on the phone -- we talked on the phone for like a a month before we actually like started dating. and when i saw that picture, somebody sent me that picture because i told somebody i'm talking on the phone with so and so. he's like, "uh, wait a minute." and he sent me, my friend sent me that picture. when i confronted him, he's like, "uh, yes, what am i going to say?" [ laughter ] he's like, "i did it." >> jimmy: he's like yeah you stole his light. so now -- we have to get into the movie. because gosh, i love reese witherspoon. >> i love her too. i love her more. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's so not true, man. i -- >> you did not make out with her. i have. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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>> jimmy: how do you know? [ laughter ] i haven't, by the way. that's pretty sad. >> no, it's the story of two women that are trying to -- to run for their lives, you know. so there's a cars chase, there's guns, i mean, you name it, there is everything. making out. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i mean, oh, yeah. by the way, it definitely happened. yeah, absolutely. but also it's funny. >> it is funny, of course, it's not just sexy. it's funny. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] that's my slogan for "the tonight show." [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i'm not a piece of meat. i'm not a piece of meat! i'm a human being. >> nothing wrong with being a a piece of meat. >> jimmy: but i'm watching, thank you. i guess. coming from you that's very nice. i was watching -- i saw the film, it's so funny. but i was watching the trailer before i saw the film. >> yes. >> jimmy: and i'm laughing hysterical. you're in bed or you actually
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you're to be like pretending to be under the sheets in the back of a -- >> in the back of a truck, in a a pickup truck and we're running away. we're hiding from the men that are trying to kill us. >> jimmy: yeah. >> so we have to go underneath like whatever we thought it was a blanket but it ended up being a deer skin. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: so it's a deer skin? >> it was disgusting. >> jimmy: so i'm watching this and reese picks up the blanket and you get smacked in the face. >> it was real, this was like a a real, real thing that she did on -- not on purpose, i hope. >> jimmy: never. >> she pulled the thing and hit me super hard. >> jimmy: but she really did hit you. almost knocked your teeth out. >> almost knocked my teeth out, it was awful. i thought i was going, i thought i was bleeding or something. >> jimmy: it's funny. anything for comedy. >> it was not funny. >> jimmy: no. it was bad. >> it was bad. >> jimmy: yeah, reese. bad reese. >> but it came out funny. >> jimmy: anything for comedy. anything for a laugh. i want to show just a clip of that. here's reese witherspoon nearly
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knocking out sofia's teeth. >> okay. >> jimmy: look, it's funny. >> the blanket. >> oh my god! [ audience oohs ] [ applause ] >> that sound -- >> jimmy: that's not funny. >> that sound was real. >> jimmy: that sound was real? >> that sound for me it was like. >> jimmy: can you show that one more time? i'm sorry. [ claps ] >> i'm glad you like it so much. >> jimmy: i promise i won't bump into the next commercial using that, i promise. watch, we're going to do it. [ laughter ] i want to show an actual clip of the film, it's very funny. "hot pursuit." here's sofia vergara and reese witherspoon pretending to be a couple in "hot pursuit." take a look at this. >> i'm calling the cops. >> no. this is outrageous. >> no, no, no. >> this is racial profiling. i can't be a lesbian because she's so unattractive and talks like some tiny little robot. well let me tell you something, she's my tiny little weird robot. and i love her. >> what are you doing?
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what are you doing? what are you doing? >> trying to show him that i love you. >> what are you doing? >> distracting him so he won't call the cops. >> yeah, i need to report two suspicious women on my property. >> it's not working. >> fix it. >> okay. oh, yeah. pull my hair. like that. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: sofia and i are playing catchphrase with a a special guest when we come back. come on back everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ [ girl ] my mom, she makes underwater fans that are powered by the moon. ♪ [ birds squawking ] my mom makes airplane engines that can talk. [ birds squawking ] ♪
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my mom makes hospitals you can hold in your hand. ♪ my mom can print amazing things right from her computer. [ whirring ] [ train whistle blows ] my mom makes trains that are friends with trees. [ train whistle blows ] ♪ my mom works at ge. ♪
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, everybody.
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i am hanging out with higgins and sofia vergara. [ cheers and applause ] oh my goodness. sofia stars along with reese witherspoon in the comedy "hot pursuit" which is in theaters on friday. sofia and i are teaming up for a game of catchphrase. but first we need opponents. you look so psyched. >> no, you always make me do this weird american games that i don't know how to play. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: it's a very easy game. i'll explain it to you as soon as we announce the opponents coming out. >> okay. >> jimmy: you'll be great. do you want to show everyone how you high fived me during the commercial break? >> i am tired, jimmy. enough of this. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: i get a high five. >> and i did like this. >> jimmy: that's not how you high five. >> i didn't have energy. >> jimmy: i came to you, man. he's a great guy, he's a a terrific actor. he's starring in the new movie with jack black called "the d train" which will be in theaters this friday. say hello to james marsden, ladies and gentlemen. ♪
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[ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh, come on! >> how are you? >> jimmy: mm, mm. what's up james? >> looks like it, too. >> jimmy: all right everybody. james is playing -- >> let's play, let's play. >> jimmy: --with "tonight show" announcer, the one and only steve higgins is your partner. okay. but here's how the game works. james you're going to start the game by pressing start on the buzzer here then drawing a clue from the top of the pile. get your teammate, steve higgins, to guess the clue as quickly as possible then hand the buzzer off to the person on your right. >> okay. >> to my right. >> jimmy: you can make any physical gesture. you can say anything. but you can't say any word in the actual clue. >> can i say words in spanish? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no. >> steve: no. >> okay. >> jimmy: if you're holding the buzzer when it goes off, your team loses that round. first team to win two rounds wins the game. let's take our positions. >> steve: okay. >> where am i? over here? >> jimmy: you're going to go over there. >> so what do we win? what is the prize? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you get two tickets to go see "hot pursuit" this
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weekend and "the d train." you get to see those two movies. >> steve: at kip's bay. >> jimmy: at kip's bay. i love that place. all right, james, here you go. you press start and then choose the clue. and good luck to you guys. high five. [ laughter ] low five. >> here we go. >> jimmy: all right, here we go. >> you guys played a good game. >> jimmy: yeah, good luck. >> all right. ready? >> jimmy: draw the clue. >> all right. now it's a thing that you hold, the camera's out -- >> steve: selfie stick. >> jimmy: oh to the right. is the me? >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's ready? okay. this is an insect. it's red and has black dots on it and it -- >> juana maraketa. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: judges? >> it's a ladybug. >> jimmy: yes! [ applause ] >> steve: okay. bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, oh, sexylady. >> is it pitbull? >> steve: no, no, no. psy. the only korean rapper in the world. >> that we know of. [ laughter ]
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>> steve: a bunch of dudes. a bunch of criminals are a -- >> okay. that's too much time. [ buzzer ] >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: gangnam style. oh, yeah, we got one. see, isn't this game fun? [ laughter ] >> is that a tie? >> jimmy: no. here we go. >> okay. >> jimmy: 1-0 here we go. >> i push and then what? >> steve: push, then grab. >> pull. >> jimmy: push, grab and bop it. no here we go. >> why are you sleeping? [ laughter ] my outfits for sleeping. >> jimmy: your outfits for sleeping? >> yes. >> jimmy: a flannel pajamas. >> no, no, please look at me. >> jimmy: lingerie? >> no, better than that. less than that. >> nothing. >> it's like a whatever. >> jimmy: a teddy? >> no, like they also say it when you give birth, a woman gives birth. when you are born, when you're born!
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>> jimmy: when you're born you give -- >> what do you wear when you're born. >> jimmy: nothing. don't sleep in the nude. >> no! >> jimmy: oh, naked. >> but what do you wear when you're born? >> jimmy: nothing. oh, a diaper! >> no! [ buzzer ] >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: you did good in here. >> steve: birthday suit. >> jimmy: ohh. >> i mean, i am not playing with you any more. >> jimmy: i mean, what are you talking about? >> how could you not -- >> jimmy: what, how could i not. it was a confusing clue. >> how could it be more easy than i said, what i sleep in. >> jimmy: how about happy birth -- >> no, you can't say the words, right. >> jimmy: then say feliz blahh. [ laughter ] here we go. >> all right. all right. i have a sense about this. i have a bad. >> steve: a bad feeling. >> it's in my stomach, though. >> steve: gut, gut feeling. >> yes. >> you're good. [ cheers and applause ]
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>> here we go. >> jimmy: all right. ready, ready? i'll be back. >> arnold schwarzenegger. >> jimmy: yeah. >> terminator? >> jimmy: yes! [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh, it's not june rain brings august flowers. yeah, but what's the phrase? >> april flowers. [ laughter ] >> steve: april -- >> april showers bring may flowers. >> steve: yes. [ cheers and applause ] >> focus. >> jimmy: i am focused. quit saying that. >> okay. what the girls in america go and -- [ laughter ] okay. so their thirsty. >> jimmy: yeah. >> after work. >> jimmy: uh-huh. >> and they don't want to pay for the drinks. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. happy hour. >> yes. [ buzzer ] [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: we won! we won! we won! >> thank you! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that was the best. oh my goodness. that was the best ever. our thanks to sofia vergara. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> jimmy: james marsden right there.
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steve higgins. more "tonight show" after the break. stick around everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ yeah, i'm married - does it matter? you'd do that for me? really...?
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yeah, i'd like that. who you talking to? jake from state farm. sounds like a really good deal. jake, from state farm at three in the morning? who is this? it's jake, from state farm. what are you wearing, jake from planet state farm. ...state farm uh, khakis... she sounds hideous. well, she's a guy, so... another reason more people stay with state farm. get to a better state. at with a great sandwich onrts the new "simple 6 menu." with six of our best six-inch subs, like the tender turkey breast, plus any bag of chips and a 21-ounce drink, for just $6 every day. when broker chris hill stays at laquinta and fires up free wi-fi, with a network that's now up to 5 times faster than before
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest is a a talented actor starring with jack black in a new film called "the d train" which opens friday. he also stars with our pal kristen wiig in "welcome to me" in select theaters right now. please welcome james marsden, everybody. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome, welcome. thank you. thank you for playing catchphrase with us. that's intense. >> it's intense and i get nervous. >> jimmy: it's a scary game. >> and my mind doesn't work and i get confused. >> jimmy: it's just yelling. >> talking like that. >> jimmy: yeah, she's yelling at us. >> yelling, and you can't understand what she's saying. >> jimmy: no, i do but -- >> you have to be looking at her. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah.
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the whole thing was just a lot of pressure. but i came through in the end and just won the whole thing. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: dude, thank you so much for coming on the show again. >> thanks for having me, man. >> jimmy: congrats on all these great movies. do you go by james your whole life. even as a kid, james? >> no, i was jimmy, actually. my family, they still call me jimmy. i grew up as jimmy. i started -- when i got into acting, i found some early success and started to show up in like the teeny bop magazines. >> jimmy: right. >> jimmy sounded a little too bubblegummy for me. so i wanted to take, you know, my career a little more seriously. [ laughter and applause ] maybe bubblegummy is not the right word. it's more sort of like infantile or like, sophomoric. you know? it was just not professional. i guess. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. if you had the name jimmy -- >> yeah, it just doesn't -- it doesn't mean i'm here, i mean business. you know? >> jimmy: what does it mean to you? >> it just means like, "hi, i'm jimmy! [ laughter ] hey, look at me!" >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> look at me, i'm jimmy. >> jimmy: hey, look at me, i'm
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jimmy. and do a hoedown. >> oh, god, i forgot! >> jimmy: yeah, right. yeah, yeah, yeah. that's why he's a good actor right there. can we talk about "the d train," this film is out in select theaters this weekend. it's you, jack black. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's a comedy. but i would say it's a very dark comedy. >> yeah, it is. >> jimmy: at one point it just screeches to a halt and something crazy happens. i don't want to even talk about it. >> it's like a john hughes movie gone really, really dark. >> jimmy: yeah. well, jack is the guy who runs alumni at your high school and he's trying to get everyone back to the 20-year reunion. and you play the cool kid who went to the high school and you're a big star now in his eyes because you're in a banana boat commercial. >> right, right. so he thinks if gets me, the coolest guy in high school to come back for the reunion, everyone will show up. but he thinks i've made it in hollywood because i'm in this like lame commercial. i've been there for 20 years. he does figure out a way to get me to come back. it's so interesting because i was not that guy in high school. >> jimmy: you were not the cool? >> no i was not. >> jimmy: oh, come on. >> listen, everyone always wants to talk about i'm the nerd.
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>> jimmy: i was so gawky and awkward, man. >> no, i was like a real drama nerd. actually, the directors needed a photo of me from high school. they're like, "send us a photo, like, your high school photo you looking sort of bad ass and cool hair." it's like, "i don't have any." and they said, "no, no, just like looking like a -- you know, like a ladies man, like a cool guy." i said, "i don't. there's none. i'm like, i was not that guy." so i sent them what i had. they sent me an e-mail back and said, "this is a real problem." [ laughter ] and jack, jack looks like a -- >> jimmy: we have the photo. and you tell me if this is not a cool dude. he's the guy wearing the jock t-shirt right there. [ laughter and applause ] yeah. >> you know. i was -- >> jimmy: please cut that out and make memes of that, like jock jimmy in space. what kind of scene, what's happening in this scene? [ laughter ] >> it's uh -- >> jimmy: i don't understand
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what the heck's going on. >> those are my brothers and sisters. and i'm maybe getting ready to go for a run? i don't know. >> jimmy: yeah, you're a jock. >> you know, i was an athlete. see? it says so right there on the shirt. >> jimmy: yeah, it says so on your shirt. >> by the way, this is before ironic t-shirts. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: so you actually thought that meant you were a a jock. >> yeah, yeah. i needed to let people know how athletic i was. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. well i want to show everyone a a clip of "the d train." this is james marsden and jack black. take a look at this. >> hey, you know what? you should come to the reunion. 20 years coming up. >> no, man, that's not my thing. >> yeah. damn. you must be crushing on out here with the talent level off the charts. and the acting thing must help with the girls, huh? >> girls and guys. >> what with guys? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah. anyway, it's a good movie. it's a tricky movie. hey, before we go we asked you to take over our instagram
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account. >> yeah that was fun. >> jimmy: you don't have your own instagram account. >> i don't. i fought the good fight for a a long time but i think i'm thinking i need to do it now. >> jimmy: you're going to get in. >> yeah. >> jimmy: so you're going to be on instagram. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: and what is, is it just your name? james marsden? >> james underscore marsden. i think we set up. >> jimmy: james underscore marsden. >> right. >> jimmy: and do you know what you do on instagram? >> no. no, no. >> jimmy: i got you covered. i got you covered. >> okay. >> jimmy: usually people take photos of breakfast. >> oh great. >> jimmy: what you have. >> i eat breakfast. >> jimmy: what you have for breakfast. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and if you see a nice sunset. >> okay. >> jimmy: you have to take a a picture of a sunset. >> do i have to be shirtless when i do it. >> jimmy: it would help. you don't have to be. it's all breakfast and sunsets. i'll kick it off for you. >> yeah, i'd love that. you'll be my first. >> jimmy: i'll be your first, absolutely. here is your phone. >> okay. >> jimmy: all right. you just hold your phone there. i have two breakfasts right here. some eggs and bacon. [ laughter ] >> oh god. that looks great. >> jimmy: and now let's go stand over here. i got this fake sunset.
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and uh -- [ laughter and applause ] this will be good. >> i'm so excited. >> jimmy: and we'll do this. we'll selfie this. >> so nice. >> jimmy: can you get them both? ♪ you go that way a little bit. >> yeah. >> jimmy: oh yeah. right there. ♪ [ laughter ] do that again. you got it? [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> ah, so nice! >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about right there. yeah, this is going to be great. >> you got it. >> jimmy: congrats on everything, buddy. you're a good man. james marsden. james underscore marsden. "the d train" opens friday. don't go anywhere. we'll be back with fetty wap, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ what do you think? when i first sit in the seat it makes me think of a bmw. i feel like i'm in a lexus. you would think that this was a brand new audi. it's like a luxury car. feels kind of like an infinity. very similar to a range rover. this is pretty high tech. yeah it is. it reminds me of a mercedes. ♪ this is chevy? laughing i have a new appreciation for chevy. they thought about me.
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i could totally rock this. this thing feels pretty boss. it looks kind of dope. that's pretty cool. this is the jam. pretty bomb dude. maybe i will go chevy. i'm definitely in. ♪ what made you switch to i, for me,breakfast? i personally think that all the breakfast sandwiches are the same. but this is an a.m. crunchwrap. what really sets it off is i have a hashbrown in here. i'm c.j. and i'm a breakfast defector! ♪ [bong!] with the help of keeproomba from irobot.esses sensors automatically guide roomba around your home, vacuuming up dirt and debris for a more thorough clean every day. roomba. only from irobot.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest has one of the hottest songs in the country right now. performing his platinum single "trap queen" with a little help from the roots, please welcome fetty wap! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ remy boys yeah eh 17 38 i'm like hey what's up hello seen your pretty ass soon as you came in the door ♪ ♪ i just wanna chill got a for us to roll married to the money introduced her to my stove ♪ ♪ showed her how to whip it now she remixin' for low
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she my trap queen let her hit the bando ♪ ♪ we be countin' up watch how far them bands go we just set a goal talkin' matchin' lambos ♪ ♪ got 50 60 grand though man i swear i love her how she work the hey hit the strip club ♪ ♪ we be letting bands go everybody hating we just call them fans though in love with the money ♪ ♪ i ain't never letting go and i get robbed with my baby i just left the mall i'm getting ♪ ♪ fly with my baby yeah and i can ride with my baby i be in the kitchen cooking pies with my baby yeah ♪ ♪ and i can ride with my baby i just left the mall i'm getting fly with my baby yeah and i can ride with my baby ♪ ♪ i be in the kitchen cooking pies i hit the strip with ♪ ♪ my trap queen 'cause all we know is bands i just might snatch up a 'rari ♪ ♪ and buy my boo a lamb i just might snatch her a necklace drop a
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couple on a ring she ♪ ♪ ain't wanting for nothin' because i got her everything it's big zoo wap from the bando remind ♪ ♪ me where can't go boys got the stamp count up hella them bands though ♪ ♪ how -- can your bands go fetty wap i'm living fifty thousand k ♪ ♪ how i stand though if you checking for my i'm like and i get robbed ♪ ♪ with my baby i just left the mall i'm getting fly with my baby yeah and i can ride with my baby ♪ ♪ i be in the kitchen cooking pies with my baby yeah and i can ride with my baby i just left the mall i'm getting ♪ ♪ fly with my baby yeah and i can ride with my baby i be in the kitchen cooking pies ♪ ♪ i'm like hey what's up hello seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door i just wanna chill got ♪ ♪ a time for us to roll married to the money introduced her to my stove showed her how to whip it ♪ ♪ now she remixin' for low she my trap queen let her hit the bando
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we be countin' up watch how ♪ ♪ far them bands go we just set a goal talkin' matchin' lambos got 50 60 grand 500 though man i swear i love her ♪ ♪ how she work the hey hit the strip club we be letting hey everybody hating we just ♪ ♪ call them fans though in love with the money i ain't never letting go i be smoking and you know ♪ ♪ backwoods what i roll remy boy fetty eating up that's for sho i'll run in ya house then ♪ ♪ i'll -- your -- 'cause remy boyz or nothing baby ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: nonstop, nonstop. that was great. >> thank you man. i appreciate it. >> jimmy: fetty wap. fetty wap. "trap queen." it's on itunes right now. we'll be right back. fetty wap! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ (music)
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hey! let me help with that. oh, thank you! (music) introducing the one-and-only volkswagen golf sportwagen. the sportier utility vehicle. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to
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sofia vergara, james marsden, fetty wap! trap queen! and the roots right there, ladies and gentlemen. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. hope to see you tomorrow. bye-bye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪

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