tv Late Night With Seth Meyers NBC October 29, 2016 12:07am-1:07am MST
[ cheers and applause ] ?? >> announcer: from the warner theater in washington d.c., it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- kevin hart. secretary of defense, ash carter. senator from minnesota, al franken. featuring the 8g band with thaddeus dixon, corey glover, ?? [ ch and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. >> seth: good evening i'm seth meyers, this is "late night" from washington, d.c. how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] we cannot thank you enough for your hospitality this week. we've absolutely had the best time. but without any further ado, let's get to the news.
once again said hillary clinton should be locked up. well, donald, if it's any consolation, it looks like the election is locked up. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] five women have now come forward to accuse donald trump of inappropriately touching or kissing them as recently as 2005. said trump, "i would never do that and anyone who says i would is me on tape on a bus with billy bush." experts are saying that if donald trump sues the "new york times" for libel over reports that he behaved inappropriately with women, it could backfire by revealing trump's entire sexual history. said trump, "all of it?" [ laughter and applause ] during a rally in florida yesterday donald trump boasted about his plans for isis and
worst nightmare." oh, wow, so he's also running for president of isis? [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] oh, really? both at the same time? president obama has only 100 days left in office. said obama, "i just can't wait to get home to kenya -- believe it's october already?" [ laughter ] gotcha. [ laughter ] prize in literature today. [ cheers and applause ] yeah, give it up for bob dylan. said dylan, "this is the greatest honor i've ever received." or he might have said, "misses gravy's on her ivory steed." it's impossible to tell. [ laughter ] and finally a new business here if washington, d.c., opened recently allowing customers to pay $15 to take a 20-minute nap. they're calling the new service c-span.
[ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, we have an outstanding show for you tonight. he has got a new stand-up special, "what now" in theaters everywhere, october 14th. he's one of the funniest men in america, kevin hart is here tonight, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] he is our secretary of defense, ash carter, who was kind enough to have me at the pentagon. [ cheers and applause ] we're gonna have him stop by the show, too. and he ise minnesota, al franken will be joining us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] so you're here on a fantastic night. before we get to all of our fabulous guests, new bombshell allegations about donald trump's predatory behavior toward women have surfaced after a week in which trump supporters repeatedly tried to make excuses for his comments bragging about sexual assault. for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." ?? [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: even before these
fallout had resulted in a tailspin. in fact he's been doing so badly that his campaign has been reduced to arguing that they should actually be losing to hillary clinton by more. as trump campaign manager kellyanne conway tried to argue tuesday on cnn. >> why is this woman at 46%? she is like the magic 46. she 46% in new nbc news wall street journal poll. she's 46% in a lot of these swing states. >> she's ahead of your candidate though. >> and try -- pardon me. well anderson, s the first female president who has a sitting president and first lady much more popular than she'll ever be. >> but your candidate is below 40%. [ laughter ] >> is that a question? >> seth: no. [ laughter ] but this is a question. what are you talking about? [ laughter ] you think hillary should be further ahead because she is running as first female president? if running as the first female president was an advantage it probably would have happened before 2016.
but the trump camp continues to spin every negative as a positive. i'm pretty sure no matter how badly trump does on election day he's still going to give a victory speech. "people said an outsider couldn't win in this country. well, tell that to mississippi." [ laughter and applause ] so clearly, the trump campaign was already desperate and now in response to these latest allegations trump is lashing out like a wounded badger at the end of a three-day coke binge. [ laughter ] he's launched a series of paranoid, unhinged attacks on virtually every aspect of our political system. again today he claimed that, despite a thorough investigation by the fbi, hillary clinton should be locked up. which may come as a surprise to his running mate, mike pence, who keeps trying to dismiss trump's comments as a joke. >> hillary clinton made a swipe at donald trump about being glad he wasn't in charge of the law. and he said well, if you would, then you'd be in jail. it was obviously -- it was
quip during the course of that debate. >> seth: yeah. and take it from the expert on quips, mike pence. [ laughter ] i don't know he just doesn't seem like a jokester to me. i get the feeling that if you went up to mike pence and said, pull my finger, he'd rip it off your hand and beat you to death with it. [ laughter and applause ] and in addition to trying to discredit our democratic institutions, trump has also been running new ads stoking ominous text, quote, "donald trump will protect you. he is the only one who can." [ light laughter ] "i can protect you. i'm the only one who can," sounds like a line from a lifetime movie about a lunatic stalking his ex-wife. [ laughter ] and here's that poster. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] now all of this -- all of this has republicans scrambling to decide where they stand on
said he will no longer defend trump and senator john mccain withdrew his endorsement of trump completely. and on tuesday night trump lashed out at both of them. >> he was begging for my endorsement. >> i know -- >> people are calling. his friends are calling. and then -- >> be the better man. >> the first sign of a little bit of difficulty, he un-endorses. i wouldn't want to be in a foxhole with a lot of these people. >> seth: well guess what? no one would want to be in a foxhole with you either. especially because it would be the easiest foxhole for the enemy to find. and then there are those courageous republicans who endorsed trump, then unendorsed him when they saw the access hollywood tape, and then re-endorsed him again just a few days later. like senators john thune and deb fischer. but i mean, that's got to be the last time they'll flip-flop, right? surely there are no more bombshell revelations about trump that will come to light right after they change their minds. >> damning new accusations, and donald trump's presidential campaign is reeling.
they say he made unwanted physical advances on them. >> this headline from "the new york times," the latest in a flurry of accusations from women about donald trump. >> one told "the new york times" that trump groped and kissed her on an airplane back in the '80s. another says that he kissed her when they were waiting for an elevator together. >> also breaking overnight, a former "people" magazine reporter has now accused donald trump of assaulting her in 2005. >> seth: now trump denied the allegations, calling them ludicrous, at a rally today. but here is the problem for p. believe he did what he is accused of. why? because an irrefutable inside source told us so -- donald trump. >> you know, i'm automatically attracted to beautiful. i just start kissing them. it's like a magnet. it just is. and when you're a star, they let you do it. you can you do anything. >> seth: donald trump is his own deep throat. [ laughter ] he's creep throat. [ cheers and applause ]
specific detail how he got away with exactly the kind of sexual assault these women are now describing which may explain why trump supporters have gone to absurd lengths this week to try to excuse or dismiss the comments on that tape. like ben carson who dismissed the comments as mere bragging, and tried to argue to a stunned cnn anchor that the real problem was that she hadn't heard more of that kind of talk. >> as i was growing up people were always trying to talk about their sexual conquests and don -- you know, casanova. i'm surprised you haven't heard that, i really am. >> i haven't heard it, and i know a lot of people who have not heard it. and i think they were shocked. >> maybe that's the problem. maybe that's the problem. [ laughter ] you know, people -- >> the problem is that i haven't -- [ laughter ]
that is -- [ cheers ] that is very clearly the face of someone thinking, "are you a brain surgeon or a brain donor?" [ laughter ] one thing's for sure, you're no don casanova. but it gets crazier, because then there was trump surrogate and former new york lieutenant governor betsy mccaughey who compared trump's comments on the bus to beyonce lyrics. >> hillary clinton expresses that she finds the language on that bus horrific. but in fact she likes language like this, quote, "i came to slay, bitch, when he 'f' me good i take his ass to red lobster." [ laughter and applause ] >> seth: oof. oof! [ laughter ] betsy mccaughey got thousand island dressing in her bag swag. [ laughter and applause ] and i mean this sincerely. it should be illegal for someone to do that to a beyonce song. [ laughter and applause ] and then, then there was former
mike huckabee, who explained what's really motivating trump supporters. they will excuse any of trump's horrific behavior and rationalize it to themselves by saying, "at least he's not hillary." huckabee made that argument with a movie analogy that didn't quite add up. >> like captain quint in the original movie "jaws." he's vulgar. he's salty. he's the guy who's gonna save your butt and save your family. and so at the end of the day when he kills the shark, you're happy about it. and so the choice is, do you vote for captain quint who's gonna save your family or do you vote for the shark? >> seth: he's right, trump is quint and hillary is the shark. wait, how did that movie end again? [ screaming ] [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: actually though, actually there is one way trump is like the shark. he sucks in air like he's about
[ sniffing ] [ laughter ] >> seth: in the end, this week of revelations about trump's predatory behavior has pulled the curtain back on the moral cowardice of many in the republican party. trump supporters and his enablers in the gop will go to virtually any lengths to dismiss or excuse his worst behavior. and now in the wake of these latest allegations trump supporters and even some of the media have tried to focus not on the substance of the allegations but on the timing. >> the big push back from the campaign thus far, other than, "we're gonna sue, this is all a lie," is, "why now? why did they wait so long to come forward?" >> it happens to appear 26 days before our very important election. isn't that amazing? >> i think it's fair to question why is this coming out now? it does sort of raise questions about the timing. >> i'm just very skeptical of these allegations. and i'll tell you why. i mean, look, he's a well-known billionaire.
over such a long period of time, don't you think that they would have sued him instantaneously? that didn't happen. >> seth: when people ask why women wait to report sexual assault, that's why. because instead of believing them you question their motives. stop pretending there is an optimal time -- [ cheers and applause ] stop pretending there is an optimal time for women to go public with these kind of allegations. it's not like if you do it within the first 24 hours you [ light laughter ] these new bombshells could very well bury trump for good. which means at the very least we probably already know what the third debate between trump and hillary will look like. [ screaming ] >> seth: this has been "a closer look." ?? [ cheers and applause ] we'll be right back with more from washington, d.c., everybody. [ cheers and applause ]
? ? what? is he gone?? finally, i thought he'd never leave... tv character: why are you texting my man at 2 a.m.? no... if you want someone to leave you alone, you pretend like you're sleeping. it's what you do. on car insurance, you switch to geico. it's what you do. tv character: taking selfies in the kitchen does not make you a model. sir? you give me that salad and i will pay for your movie and one snack box. can i keep the walnuts? yes. but i get to pick your movie. can i pick the genre?
you get cash back on purchases with no annual fee. backed by the service and security of american express. you get cash back on purchases with no annual fee. ? ? special k nourish. apples, almonds, and raspberries. devour something different. special k nourish. [ "on the road again," by willie nelson ] ? on the road again ? [ rear alert sounds ] [ music stops ] ? just can't wait to get on the road again ? [ girl laughs ] ? on the road again ? ? like a band of gypsies we go down the highway ? [ beetle horn honks ] no matter which passat you choose, you get more standard features, for less than you expected. hurry in and lease the 2017 passat s for just $199 a month. ??
syd butler, give it up for syd. [ cheers and applause ] from ex hex, guitarist mary timony right there. [ cheers and applause ] we've also joined by some incredible guest, they've been sitting in with the band all week from from ground breaking, grammy award winning rock band, living colour vocalist corey glover been with us all week. [ cheers and applause ] also from living colour, he's an iconic innovator, vernon reid, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ep from living colour "who shot ya" and also a new album from the band in 2017. and finally a fantastic drummer currently playing with bryson tiller, thaddeus dixon right over there. thaddeus has a new song out "all about you" featuring timothy bloom and talib kweli. thank you so much one more round of applause for our incredible band. [ applause ] our first guest tonight is a comedian actor you know from films like "ride along" and the
you can see his latest stand-up special, "kevin hart: what now" in theaters tomorrow. please welcome to the show, one of our favorites, kevin hart, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ?? ?? >> seth: how are you? [ cheers and applause ] >> they like me! >> seth: they do. they really dig you. they really dig you. >> that's for you. >> seth: what did you get me? >> i come bearing gifts. >> seth: what is it, headphones? >> those are my headphones, just take them. >> seth: okay, great, thank you. well here, i'll hold them --i'll make sure you get a product shot. >> it's not the product shot, it's not about that, i don't care about that. [ laughter ] i'm not here for product placement. i just want to give you some cool headphones. >> seth: well, thank you, you're so kind. you're so generous. >> it's just a smart headphone
i have ownership in and you should have. [ laughter ] >> seth: that's good, i'm so glad. because you need something to go right for you because your career has been -- [ laughter ] is in the dumps so i'm glad you're branching out to business. >> yeah! >> seth: you are the busiest guy. i can't believe you found time for us, thank you so much. >> i -- i don't have time. >> seth: okay, good. >> i shouldn't be here. >> seth: season 5 of "real husbands of hollywood," congratulations. >> yes, yes, yes, just started. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: and you also new show on comedy central, "hart of the city." >> "hart of the city," i'm comedians a chance. the thing about kevin hart, third person, the thing about me -- [ laughter ] is i love to create opportunities for others. i'm a good guy, man. [ laughter ] >> seth: uh-huh, yeah. >> that's what this -- >> seth: salt of the earth. >> -- this stuff is about i love to love. i love to live. and i love to laugh. live, love, laugh. that's what i'm about. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: i -- this is your fourth stand-up special, yeah? >> this is -- this is number five. >> seth: number five. >> number five!
>> let me tell you why, seth. you got a second? >> seth: i do. [ laughter ] >> here eat thing, okay. everything goes together. my first special was called "grown little man" because that's how i felt about myself. i'm grown. i was a little man. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> my special after that was called "seriously funny." you know why i called it that? because i felt it was time to tell people, serious, guys, i'm funny, this isn't a joke, i'm serious. [ laughter ] after that, my next special was called, "laugh at my pain." i wanted people to realize that there was a deeper version of kevin that hasn't been talked about soan [ laughter ] after that, i did another special about "let me explain." that's when weird stuff happened, like a dui. got a divorce. i felt people were judging me so i said, "whoa, don't judge me, let me explain." [ laughter ] now, after that, after that, i made history. i performed at madison square garden when i did "let me explain." i thought that was it. i got on stage and as soon as i thought i made history, the first question that came to me was, "what now?" >> seth: sure.
what now? what now?" and i thought about it and i said that's a question that should always come up and that you should always have an answer for, hence the title, "what now?" [ laughter ] this is seen genius, guys, if you think about it. [ cheers and applause ] it's genius, seth! >> seth: it is genius. >> it's genius! [ applause ] >> seth: and, you mentioned madison square garden which is an incredible venue to perform comedy in because it's so big but then for this show, you performed at "lincoln financial field" in philadelphia, 53,000 seats. >> 53,000 people, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: the first time -- is it like that in a football stadium? >> it is the first time a comedian has ever performed in a football stadium and sold it out. uh -- we went and the idea came up and people thought i was crazy because they were like, "you can't make it intimate, it's too big." and i love a challenge. i love to break new ground. i love to raise the bar for myself. so i went and did it. we sold it out in two weeks. we did the show. i said, "you know what i'm going to do? i'm going to tell basically an hour of material but i'm going
so when i fold jokes, my background basically it integrated into what i was talking about. >> seth: yeah. so you talked about a drive way you see a drive way. >> you see the drive way. >> seth: it is really cool. >> so it was all told from my pov. the audience was engaged, i had big monitors up on each side of the stage and you know, it killed. here's the thing about the show, seth. [ laughter ] the beauty of what i did is i made history but i did it in my city. i wanted to bring attention to philadelphia. >> seth: right. >> and now philadelphia has so much to stand on including a guy who loves his city because his city made him who he is today. in return, i show my city i love them and i say, let's make more history. that's why my movie is coming out in theaters. why? because i own it, i put it out myself. why did i do that? [ laughter ] because i believe in me. when you believe in you, you do what people don't expect to you do. the moral of the story is tie your shoes, when i get to -- [ laughter ] >> seth: well, all right, you mentioned shoes. and for all your accomplishments
you appeared on a magazine that that's my dream magazine. you were on the cover of "runners world." >> oh, yeah, yeah. >> seth: and you're an actual runner. >> yes i am. >> seth: you're a real deal runner. >> i'm a real deal runner. >> seth: and you are in very good shape, and yet this is the greatest you -- because it's their anniversary, it's their 50th anniversary. so you took three covers and you started with a 70s cover. >> yeah. that's the one i went. >> seth: and there you go, fantastic. >> yep. [ laughter ] and i thought, nothing beats 70s but then your 80s is pretty -- >> there you go. you gotta make sure you show -- [ laughter ] >> seth: then we have the official one right there. >> right there. >> seth: which is really good. congratulations. [ cheers and applause ] >> you know i just wanted to -- thank you, thank you, and major thank you to "runner's world." [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: i want to ask this because you know especially speaking of going back to your roots in philadelphia and you know, this is obviously a much bigger theater than we're used to, you played 53,000 in lincoln financial, what were some of the worst rooms you early in your career? >> the worst rooms? i performed in a male strip
that was tough. >> seth: between acts or? >> i guess like the halftime, of dicks? i don't know what it was, man. [ laughter ] you know, i came in and i was shocked when i came in because i was like, "i'm not doing that." [ laughter ] you know, i came here to tell jokes. but it was like a bunch of women, it was -- at the time like 50 women there and they stopped the show and they were like, "all right, ladies, let's get ready for comedy." and they bring me out first and it wasn't even like an intro, they were like, "all right, let's get ready for comedy, lil' kev the bastard." [ laughter ] and it wasn't even a stage, like i was standing in the middle of the floor like i was on the same level as the crowd, which isn't safe. [ laughter ] >> seth: no, no. >> you should never be in arm's reach as a comedian. so i started telling jokes and out of nowhere this guy stands up and throws a buffalo wing at me, true story. i don't know what pissed me off more, it was either the fact that he threw it or that he connected because he was far back there and it hit me in the cheek and i was like, "who is that accurate with a buffalo
[ laughter ] a buffalo wing should take all different types of different directions, he was able to throw a straight buffalo wing, hit me in the cheek, little bit of the sauce got in my eye, it burned. [ laughter ] and i tried to stand up for myself. i was like, "who threw it?" he was like, "i did." and i was like, he's serious about his [ bleep ] feeling right now so i need to just get up out of here. [ laughter ] >> seth: thank you so much for being here. >> thank you, man. >> seth: such a fan. [ cheers and applause ] always good to see you. kevin hart, everybody! "kevin hart: what now" is in theaters tomorrow. we'll be back with the secretary of defense, ash carter. [ cheers and applause ] ?? ? i got it, dad. ow! ?
first kid you ready? by their second kid, every mom is an expert, and more likely to choose luvs than first time moms. new luvs with nightlock plus absorbs wetness faster than huggies snug & dry, to help stop leaks - even overnight. and you can save up to $150 per year by choosing luvs over huggies. live, learn, and get luvs. this is the story of fall's biggest fan. and from an early age she learned to love the season. leaf piles and pumpkin pies. hot apple cider and cozy sweaters. which brings us to the very moment she fell for fall all over again. was she expecting to find the perfect designer boots at such an amazing price? no. but that's the beauty of a store full of surprises. you never know what you're gonna find, but you know you're gonna love it. marshalls. your surprise is waiting.
did you just spank your lunch? yes. nice. food you want to fork. introducing devour. inside the rack houses of jim beam thousands of barrels lay silent aging, building a fuller smoother flavor that only comes from being aged four long years at jim beam our history is made from the inside now try jim beam apple poured over ice and serve with club soda and a fresh lemon wedge
defense, ash carter. there's ash right there. [ cheers and applause ] there's the secretary. it was an incredible experience that i will never forget. let's take a look. ?? >> seth: we're at the pentagon, home to our nation's armed forces as well as 284 bathrooms. and i'm going to spend the day with secretary of defense, ash carter. ?? >> seth: you know, i don't get to hang out with a military personnel very often. do you mind if i ask you guys some questions. >> yes, sir. >> sure. >> seth: petty officers. >> yes, sir. >> seth: seal team 6 or seal the musician? >> oh, seal the musician of course, come on. [ laughter ] >> seth: staff sergeant. >> yes sir? >> seth: knocking isis into next tuesday or knocking isis back to the stone age? >> stone age, sir. i have plans next tuesday. [ laughter ] >> hey guys, my whole life i've
be like if people had to stand to attention when i entered a room. would you mind if we tried it? >> sure. >> sure. ?? [ laughter ] >> seth: as you were. [ applause ] [ laughter ] ?? [ laughter ] >> seth: as you were. okay, so i know everyone's respective branch of the military is their favorite but on the count of three i want everyone to tell me their least favorite. 1, 2, 3. >> all: coast guard. [ laughter and applause ] >> sir, definitely coast guard. >> seth: fair, fair. [ phone rings ] >> sir, secretary carter will see you now. >> seth: thank you so much for doing this. >> seth, thanks for coming to the pentagon. >> seth: my pleasure. >> want to see my office? >> seth: yeah. >> come on in.
every morning i sit with the chairman of the joint chiefs of staff we go through thing for the day. this desk, that's my desk right there. it belonged to general jack pershing of world war i fame. and you want to see something really cool? >> seth: yeah. so this is a direct line to president obama. >> seth: no way. >> yeah. want to prank him? >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> seth: hey, president obama, it's seth and i'm here with ash and we're wondering if you want to annex switzerland? that's a good idea. if you don't call we're going to probably just go ahead with it? okay, bye. [ laughter ] [ russian accent ] president barack obama this is vladimir putin. we have your secretary ash carter and we will not be giving him back. >> you'll never hold me. >> seth: no, he's getting away! please, don't let him jump on my horse! oh, no this is very bad! [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i have a theory that at the pentagon, anything is dramatic if you deliver it in a file.
let's try. ?? >> seth: mr. secretary, we're ordering lunch and we need to you pick a menu. [ laughter ] ?? >> gyro's from pita pocket. >> seth: are you sure? >> never been more sure about anything. ?? [ laughter ] tzatziki sauce. >> huh? >> seth: can you pass the tzatziki sauce? >> yeah. [ laughter ] the big room. it's where we meet with foreign leaders. >> seth: do you want to pretend i'm a north korean leader? >> all right. mr. ambassador, i want you to stop your provocations and if you do you'll become a valued
>> seth: no. [ laughter ] can i try to guess the nuclear codes? >> sure. >> seth: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. >> no. -- we're going to need to change the nuclear codes. [ laughter and applause ] so this is the hall where we have the portraits of all the secretaries of defense. right back to the very beginning. >> seth: wow. >> up here, this guy is louis johnson. he was secretary o >> seth: all right. >> next, george marshall. general, hero of world war ii. later as civilian he became secretary of defense. >> seth: great. >> great man. up here, my portrait. >> seth: oh, great. >> come on. take a look. >> seth: you posed for that one? >> sure. [ laughter ]
to do. i'll see you later. >> seth: do you mind if i just sort of look around? >> no, no, no, take a look around. >> seth: okay, great. ?? [ laughter ] >> seth: one of the great things about the pentagon are all of the interesting items they have on display. for example, this right here is saddam hussein's gold plated ak-47. true story, this was discovered by marines, in saddam hussein's palace. not the only artifact that you would find in the pentagon. for example right here, incredible to actually see it in person, hitler's mustache discovered by private bill mulvaney. also, interesting fact. you know how many centimeters long, hitler's mustache is? "nein." [ laughter ] so vladimir putin, often in the news, often seen without a shirt, why? it's right here at the pentagon. [ laughter ] and it's a henley. one of the most famous raids in military history was of course the raid on osama bin laden's compound in abbottabad and one
compound walls was osama bin laden's pog collection. [ laughter ] it turns out that osama bin laden had one of the world's most comprehensive pog collections known to man. according to one of his wives, osama bin laden's last words upon hearing seal team 6 breach the compound were "oh, man. i hope they're not here for my pogs." [ laughter ] fun fact? there are 284 bathrooms in the pentagon. we're going to do our best to see them all. ?? ?? ?? [ flushing ]
?? [ laughter ] >> hey, how did it go? >> seth: great. so many bathrooms. >> awesome. hey, want to see something nobody's ever seen before? >> seth: yeah. >> the sixth side of the pentagon. want to? >> seth: yeah. >> come on. >> seth: whoa! ?? wow. so tell me, and be honest, what's your least favorite country? >> least favorite country, well, i guess i'd have to say -- >> secretary carter, the president would like to see you. >> tell him i'm busy with pentagon stuff. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. pentagon stuff. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: we're here with the secretary of defense,
and i had such a wonderful time with you. such a wonderful time with your staff. but i wanted you to come out here because, you know, we were so excited that you allowed us to come visit you. my question is, why did you say yes? [ laughter ] >> i kind of have an interest in the same demographic you do. >> seth: okay. >> we got 18-24, very important watchers of yours and we have, there's some of them in the au. >> seth: we have some of the many service men and women here with us tonight. >> fighting for us. [ cheers and applause ] so look at them. that is the finest fighting force the world has ever known. and in addition to using it -- clap for them. [ cheers and applause ] in addition to making sure that
tomorrow's force is fine as this one. and i can't take that for granted. what makes our military great is people. and so i want to -- i'm hoping somebody out there will watch and will realize that, you know, military service involves all of the things that people say. sacrifice, sometimes danger and all that. but there's a trend of satisfaction also with being part of something bigger than yourself, with, look at this -- this is culture, it's comedy, it's all of the wonders of life. people get to wake up in the morning, take their kids to school, live their lives, dream their dreams. and safety makes that possible. so that's our job. and if you get to be part of that, that's tremendously satisfying. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: well, i cannot thank you enough. it was such an inspiring day for us. >> thanks for having me. >> seth: one more time, not just for the secretary of defense ash carter --
house tonight. thank you all so much for your service. we'll be right back with senator al franken. [ cheers and applause ] ?? initiating retrieval sequence. activating thrusters. dang it! ah! come on! astronauts can vote from space. take a break from the election with red or blue tea. make time for snapple. it's endless shrimp at red lobster. with another new flavor you never saw coming... grilled, glazed korean bbq shrimp.
just come in before it ends. ?? you never believed in fairytales. knights in shining armor or happily ever after. but you believed when the right one came along, you'd be ready. time to shine. orbit. recently, a 1954 mercedes-benz grand prix race car made history when it sold for a record price of just under $30 million. makes history selling at just over $30,000. and to think this one actually has a surround-sound stereo. the 2016 cla. lease the cla250 for $299 a month at your local mercedes-benz dealer. mercedes-benz. the best or nothing. mmm... i can't believe it's so delicious. i can't believe it has 40% fewer calories than butter. i can't believe it's made with real, simple ingredients.
l. real ingredients. unbelievable taste. go ahead, enjoy. real ingredients. unbelievable taste. to feel this special... you need to eat this special. ?? ? i love it ? start your day with crunchy whole-grain flakes... and real strawberries. special k. eat special. feel special. (announcer vo) the new pixel phone by google. only on verizon. okay, google, show me korean restaurants in boulder? (google assistant) i found a few places. (announcer vo) the only network than can power unlimited photo storage, and a stunning vr experience. how is this possible? (announcer vo) so buy a pixel, only on verizon, and get up to $300 back. and right now get four lines and 20 gigs for just 160 with no surprise overages.
>> seth: our next guest has been a comedian, writer, best selling author, radio talk show host since 2009, he's served as the junior senator of minnesota, please welcome to the show, our friend senator al franken. ?? [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: how are you, senator? >> i'm good. >> seth: alright, good. i want to start with the news of the week here. >> okay. >> seth: donald trump claiming the things he said on that bus were locker room talk. do you have any thoughts about that? >> i've been in a lot of locker rooms. you know, i belong to health club -- >> seth: oh wow. >> in minneapolis. [ laughter ] i think you can tell. >> seth: yeah, we can tell. [ laughter ] >> and our locker room banter is
[ laughter ] and so i don't know what locker room -- he may work out with roger ailes. and they may -- [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] >> seth: that would be different locker room. [ cheers and applause ] >> but you know, i think these stories are going to make it hard for trump to focus on his message that he knows nothing about. [ laughter ] public policy. >> seth: you think that will get lost, that he knows nothing about public py. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] that's very nice of you. so i have to ask this, did you ever -- you used to live in new york, obviously. >> yes. >> seth: worked for "saturday night live." did you ever run into trump? was he somebody you ever met? >> you know, i was in a number of rooms with him over the years. just handful of times. we didn't really travel in the same circles. we were both kind of in entertainment too.
he didn't seem like the kind of guy i would like to get to know. >> seth: yep. [ laughter ] >> but there was this one time, remember when "the sopranos" was huge -- >> seth: huge. >> it was big. but the fourth season or so, they decided to show the first two -- have a screening of the first two episodes of the season at radio city music hall. and radio city music hall is about 6,000 people. >> seth: yeah, three times this. >> yeah, yeah, huge, huge i am directly behind sitting, directly behind donald trump. and my wife's here. amd trump's directly in front of me. before the lights go out, for some reason, i just say, and i have a loud voice, and i say this as loud as i can, "that is the worst comb-over i've ever seen." [ laughter ]
and he sees it's me and he goes, like that. [ laughter ] he had nothing. so that's it. >> seth: there you go. >> that's my encounter with donald trump. >> seth: now, i want to ask, tell us how you feel about hillary. especially at this point in this election. >> i have been a supporter of hillary throughout this whole election cycle. she is the smartest, toughest, most experienced, hardest working person i know. [ cheers and applause ] and -- and it's important that all your viewers understand that while it seems like trump probably won't win, you know. [ applause ] >> seth: it's too early to say.
it is absolutely essential that you get out and vote. it is absolutely essential. like nothing -- [ cheers and applause ] i won my first campaign by 312 votes. so -- [ laughter and applause ] and there they are. [ laughter ] it's absolutely -- and you know, i'm -- i want my -- i o the senate. [ cheers and applause ] the majority sets the agenda. and so i want to make sure that everybody votes. >> seth: that's great. that's very helpful. thanks so much for being here. such a pleasure. >> seth. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: senator al franken everybody, we'll be right back with more "late night." [ cheers and applause ]
alright, did you know i was the mommy slam dunk champion? really? yes, really! don't sound so surprised. let's see it! -oh you're ready. alright, here we go. let's hear the crowd. ahhhh! i go to the right. i go to the left. fake 'em out. mama go up, up, up! she did it. -again? you can't avoid gravity. but unitedhealthcare can help you avoid financial surprises by helping you compare costs and doctor quality ratings. unitedhealthcare start boldly... with the apple that bites back. redd's wicked apple.
my moderate to severe chronic plaque psoriasis made a simple trip to the grocery store anything but simple. so i had an important conversation with my dermatologist about humira. he explained that humira works inside my body to target and help block a specific source of inflammation that contributes to my symptoms. in clinical trials, most adults taking humira were clear or almost clear, and many saw 75% and even 90% clearance in just 4 months. humira can lower your ability to fight infections, imes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened; as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. before treatment, get tested for tb. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores. don't start humira if you have an infection. ask about humira,
little dakota's nose was quivering in fear. because it knew an ordinary tissue was near. the fiery tissue left her nose sore and red. so dad slayed the problem with puffs plus lotion, instead. puffs have pillowy softness for dakota's tender nose. with lotion to comfort and soothe when she blows. don't get burned by ordinary tissues. a nose in need deserves puffs, indeed.
?? >> the reflecting pool. located directly east of the lincoln memorial, this landmark plays host to almost 24 million visitors every year. but did you know that about 80 of those visitors jump into the pool with swim trunks and floaties? in addition to the picturesque reflection of the washington monument glistening in the sun-dappled water, visitors of the reflecting pool are also quite likely to see a security guard dragging someone wearing a bathing suit and a snorkeling mask out of the water while he says, "hey man, i just wanted to take a quick dip." to which the security guard would sigh and say, "it's not that kind of pool. the water is like a foot and half deep." which would prompt the guy to say, "so, it's like baby pool?" the security guard would then turn to his partner and say, "can you believe this guy,