tv Jimmy Kimmel Live ABC November 30, 2016 11:35pm-12:37am EST
tonight we teamed up with bono from u and two to assemble do-gooders to raise money for awareness and the fight against aids. tonight we're going to fight aids, tomorrow we're going to fight with our families, what do you say to that? here to help out what a group. bono, julia roberts, heart reserve channing tatum, kristen bell, halsey, neil patrick harris, dj khaled and the killers. it will be a fun show. i'm excited we're going to do some good i'm excited julia roberts is backstage making small talk with dj khaled. a win-win. red has raised over $360 million over the past years, a lot of money to raise. [ cheers and applause ] apparently they blew it on aids research so here we are again. all money raised goes directly
we're not asking you to run a marathon or dump a bucket of ice on your head. all you need to do is shop. if you can't do that, find another country to live in it's unamerican. last year we raised $28 million. this year bank of america made a $20 million commitment to fight aids, the bill and melinda gates foundation is matching every dollar we raise. these companies and organizations are changing people's lives for the better. tonight you may be able to change your own life for the better by entering to favorite star through omaze the website. you can go to vegas on a magic mike weekend with channing tatum. [ cheers and applause ] maybe even come back pregnant, who knows. you can see hamilton and meet the guy who plays hamilton. you can win a night on the town with neil patrick harris. have lunch at nobu with liam
roberts. u2 and bono will do a show just for you. u2 and you, too. if i do have to go to the bathroom in the middle of it, bono will stop playing until you get back, how amazing is that. last year bono took his winner bike riding in central mark. matthew mccongh winners to a u.t. football game. james franco painted his winner's portrait. kim kardashian gave the winner a make seven over. this year dj khaled will take you on a jet ski ride. wouldn't you love to tell your grandchildren you rode on a jet ski with dj khaled if go to
all these songs, 10 of them, are on one album called don't waste your wishes. you can get that on itunes and apple music. are you ready? [ cheers and applause ] let's get this started. >> how are you? how are you? allow me on to slip into something comfortable. wow. >> hello america! and canada. >> and canada, canada.
interesting fact. did you know that red is one of the three primary colors? along with yellow and blue. >> jimmy: wow! >> that's so interesting clam. >> jimmy: i did not know that, well, that is a great way to jump into our first amazing red product. which i believe julia has, headphones. this is a gift for those s in headphone cords. >> i had to cut my hair to free myself from a pair of earbuds. it grew back. >> these headphones are just the thing for you. >> not a wire in sight. >> does this have anything to do with saith tannism? >> no, it's technology.
? who let the dogs out ? that's my favorite song! ? who let the dogs out ? >> jimmy: you're screaming a little. with up to 40 hours of battery life, it's your perfect everyday headphone. ? who, who ? >> a. >> a five-minute charge gives you three hours of playback. ? i mean you you know they never did findut >> the red special edition power station plus. $79.95, you can get your phone charged -- >> guillermo what are you doing? what are you doing? >> my apple watch with my brand-new red sport band told me
any time now you want to deliver that next line. >> guillermo: so i get up and move. >> jimmy: well, okay, thank god that red sports band is our next product or you would most certainly have been fired just now. isn't that right, ladies? >> i would fire him myself. i would just say ?you're fired?" it's fun! >> saying ?you're fired!? is fun! you're fired, guillermo! >> guillermo: okay. >> jimmy: the red apple watch sport band is one of the coolest things you can wear on your wrist. guillermo, would you mind showing your watch to the viewers? now guillermo, a watch band like that couldn't go for less than $9400, right? >> guillermo: that's wrong, dumbass! it's for the low, low price of $49 with a portion of the proceeds going to red's fight against aids. i have to keep moving, sorry guys. >> jimmy: it's okay. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you, guillermo. thanks. i'll tell you, i could not be more excited about our next product. >> jimmy: i'm sure that's not true. >> i bet it is true. >> it's not.
>> jimmy: wow, this must be some product! >> you bet it is jimmy. it's the s'well limited edition rowboat red 9-oz. water bottle. >> jimmy: that's amazing. why, it's a piece of red metal! >> yes! and if you twist off the cap, you can use it to store and carry liquid. >> jimmy: get out of town, there's liquid in there? >> yes, try it! >> jimmy: i'll be damned. it's water, it does look like liquid. >> it is! >> that's very watery water! >> and not only will i your liquid cool for up to 24 hours, it will also keep liquids hot for up to 12 hours. >> jimmy: wow! oh, you aren't kidding, this clam chowder is scalding hot! >> i think you just burned me badly. >> i think i did too, isn't it great? >> jimmy: it is great. >> the water is perfect for any time, when you're in the office or on the go or just objectifying the human body. >> jimmy: what is this?
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. the whole set's coming down. >> see that? >> guillermo: this wet t-shirt make me look fat? >> no. major wet "t" alert, guys! >> jimmy: that is a major "t" alert. >> did someone say major key alert? >> jimmy: what? [ cheers and applause ] it's dj khaled, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] >> they don't want you to be safe, but there's nothing more major key than safety. that's the key is to be safe. and you'll never catch me with a vespa red without my helmet on, it's so important. the key is to be safe, and of course the key is to always be around a beautiful lady. >> aww! >> it sure is, dj khaled.
edition red vespa and every vespa purchased will help provide 500 days of life-saving medication to people living with hiv. >> bless up! >> jimmy: bless up to you, dj. bless up. [ cheers and applause ] i was just going to say that. well, that was a fun surprise, wasn't it? >> it was fun, but it was also surprising. >> jimmy: yeah. >> okay, okay. >> jimmy: i know i am! [ cheers and applause ] our next set of products were created by a partnership between gap, red, and six female artists. >> six female artists? that's more than five! >> jimmy: you're so right, julia roberts. these amazing pieces of outerwear will make even the ugliest people appear to be presentable. look at our video wall. see? almost not disgusting. [ cheers and applause ] >> although still kinda disgusting to be honest. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> hideous. >> jimmy: maybe he'd look better
>> jimmy: much better. >> so much better jimmy. i was about to throw up! >> jimmy: wow. >> now buckle your seat belts everyone we're about to cruise into more fantastic products. >> you guys are going to go gaga for these next items! around the wrist is the beautiful lokai bracelet. the white bead carries water from mt. everest, the black bead contains mud from the dead sea. >> jimmy: that bracelet is quite the jetsetter! >> and on limited-edition full coverage crisp cranberry cr?me cranberry kiss nail polish. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it really is a lovely shade. why it's brandon flowers of the killers! [ cheers and applause ] >> brandon flowers is killing it in cranberry cr?me! >> thank you. >> now go away, brandon. are you ready for our next product? >> jimmy: i sure am!
>> it's the lovely, elegant pour les femmes pajamas. and here to model them for us, the fabulous mr. channing tatum. [ cheers and applause ] >> awww. look at that. he's all tuckered out. let's not wake the little guy. >> jimmy: pour les femmes is a socially conscious sleepwear company created by actress and activist robin wright and her friend, designer karen fowler. >> they're cute, comfy, and a goes to red's fight against aids. >> jimmy: that is such a good cause. i'm against aids. >> yeah, me too. that's it for now. we'll have even more amazing red products for you later in the show. >> this is so much fun, jimmy. >> sure was. thank you so much so my cohosts kristen and julia. we have to take a break. when we come back our star-studded red show continues with a duet from bono and halsey with herbie hancock, so stick around!
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[ cheers and applause ] >> my bad, my bad, i'm sorry, nph. my mistake. but nothing personal, homie. >> ha ha ha! you want to see a magic trick? >> yeah, of course i want to see one. [ cheers and applause ] >> i have my own deck. you can buy your own. i had these decks made. >> and they're beautiful. >> proceeds go to red. [ cheers and applause ] >> they're beautiful. >> instead of doing a card trick where you pi just choose a card that will represent you. to make it even more personal, i want you to sign the card in the center. >> okay, my own name? >> yeah, put it in the center there. >> okay. take that space up. >> perfect. did you sign with your right or left hand? >> right hand. >> take this. in your hand this way. hold on to it, hold on to that end. >> i'm so scared.
i want to bend the card a lot. >> okay. >> i'm going to -- >> bending the card. >> a little bit of a rip. here at the top. >> you're really destroying -- this is not the pack we're going to give you if you purchase the pack. we'll give you a new one. >> i ripped it almost all the way to the the end. you take the rest of that piece and rip it down. so it comes off. hold on to that. watch this. >> he's eating it. is that the trick? no. no. >> no. okay? [ cheers and applause ] >> no, wait. essentially nothing's happened. >> right. >> you took a card, you signed it, i put it in my mouth and swallowed it. >> that's what i saw. >> i this is this is the cool part. watch close. [ cheers and applause ] >> it's still attached.
[ cheers and applause ] >> well, that was nph amazing. >> what? >> neil, while you're here, please tell us about your exciting omaze experience. >> i think this whole thing is fantastic. red's involved, i'm working with coke. if you do ours you can win a trip, we'll fly you to new york city, put you up in a hotel, go to dinner, you and your friend with me and h [ cheers and applause ] >> that's amazing. o-mazing! >> that is o-mazing indeed. >> jimmy: thank you so much, kristen and neil patrick, he is magic, folks. [ cheers and applause ] this has been such a wild year. not necessarily in a good way. so tonight to nail that to the wall we took an old cole porter song from 1939 and reworked it with new lyrics for 2016.
piano -- mr. herbie hancock! ? let's recall 2016 and all the nonsense we have seen ? ? i don't know where to start i just can't even ? ? what a swell year this has been ? ? look at that filter ? ? the rodent less traveled ? isn't social media divine ? ? heart emoji ? ? whatever happened to vine ? ? chicago cubs broke the curse bill cosby's news ? getting worse ? beyonce smashed that windshield in ? ? if you liked it you should have put a ding on it ?
? was big for a month but now it's gone ? too soon ? it's rough never put a scribble or a jiggly post ? ? what a swell year it has been ? ? and have you heard about jon snow ? what now? ? he's still alive on that dragon show ? ? and have you seen that hamilton ? sold out ? tough ticket heard even bono can't get in ? ? i tried ? ? me too ? ? ? what a swell year this has been ? ? this year this year so weird ? ? so weird like kimmel with a beard ? ? 2016 crazy [ bleep ] ? ? you've ever seen ? ? not to fear we have it sorted ? ? or maybe we'll just get deported ?
swell year this has swell year this has ? ? truly messed up royally f'd up year this has been ? ? it really did suck ? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. bono, halsey and herbie. and here's to 2017! we'll be back with julia roberts, kristen bell, and a lot more stars. [ cheers and applause ] ? ? for me? oh my... (gasps) what is it? it's samsung gear vr. you put it in there... push the play button. ohhh... (gasps) (laughs) this is crazy! oh my gosh!
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welcome back to our red shopathon. the next group of products is from ubuntu, a line that was created to celebrate the artisan work of the my-my-ew community. and we have a very special model to show you the goods. now guillermo, where are these fantastic products you're wearing from? >> guillermo: ubuntu. >> what was that? >> guillermo: ubuntu. >> guillermo: ubuntu. >> close enough. can you take us through each product? >> sure. this is the ubuntu tote, this is the ubuntu shopper, this is the ubuntu massai travel pouch, the ubuntu bracelet and the ubuntu journal. >> well, i sure hope people at home could understand anything that you said because i sure couldn't. >> guillermo: neither could i! >> fantastic. back to you, jimmy.
>> jimmy: thank you so much, kristen. guillermo and our lazy susan, a thing of beauty. let's check in with some of our distinguished guests. the man who put this all together has 22 grammys, more than 170 million records sold and one name. his band is called u2. please welcome bono, everyone! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: have a seat, bono. >> yes. >> jimmy: bono. [ cheers and applause ] great to have you here. i know you don't like to get too heavy about this stuff. just tell us about some of the work that red does and is doing. >> well, you know, actually, let's get heavy. >> jimmy: okay. >> it's just so -- it's just great news. and it is weighty but it's great news. and this is a time of year where i think americans would like to feel that they've accomplished something together. people on the left, people on the right, working together,
alive. america is the largest part of that. 17 million people are alive -- [ cheers and applause ] because of people right and left of the aisle. you don't think these things are possible in washington but we can actually work together. >> jimmy: your goal is to eliminate aids altogether. >> that's right. >> jimmy: you feel like you will reach that goal. >> as long as we don't lose concentration. which is why your show, your team, your band, this is the had to keep the heat on this issue. if we keep the heat on the issue, then the politicians will keep concentrated and we'll keep getting the drugs to the people who will die if we don't get them the drugs. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: something that anybody would be very happy to be a part of if it was put in front of them. that's what you, do put it in front of people, let them know what is going on in other parts of the world. that said, what has happened? what have you achieved since the last time you were here last
hurt on a bicycle accident. that is an achievement. >> well, on the show last time, omaze offered people with a cycle ride in central park. sounded innocuous. but for people who knew, i'm not really a person you'd want to cycle with. that was brave and i met these two beautiful people, rob and anna, think was their name. >> jimmy: they got to ride -- >> went around the park, had lunch together, it was pretty cool. >> jimmy: this year you brought the whole band in on this deal. you are doing a private show for one person? two people? how many people come to this thing? >> it's -- it's hard to guess to get the u2 group to agree on anything. but edge, adam, larry and myself have agreed to play a private show for one person and a guest. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: so people go to omaze.com/red. it's $10. it's not one of those deals where you have to be rich.
potentially get your own private concert. >> i mean, we played to 10 people once. 37 people. but to play for two people is something special for us. >> to play to no people they say is the ultimate achievement. [ laughter ] >> every rock 'n' roll band knows what that feels like. >> jimmy: let's bring out one of your very close friends, a bona fide american sweetheart who's offering another special omaze experience, ladies and gentlemen, julia roberts! [ cheers and applause ] ? >> jimmy: i'm so interested in your friendship. because how do you know each other so well? how did you meet in the first place? >> julia roberts is irish. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that i didn't know either, that's a shocker. >> mcroberts. >> jimmy: you met how many years
>> i would say -- half my life ago. >> jimmy: half your life ago, wow. >> right? >> jimmy: bono's looking at you in a suggestive way. >> there was the boring part of my life then the bono part of my life. >> jimmy: bono's having his own omaze experience right now. >> you're not wrong, i shot a scene with roberts for the omaze commercial. i have known julia a but -- i still feel wobbly sitting beside her. >> jimmy: oh, nice. >> it's a strange feeling when bono gives you credit for craft because frankly i feel like i'm napping compared to his accomplishments. he was like, wait a minute. >> jimmy: he makes everyone feel good, he really does. >> kid's a star. >> jimmy: you are offering an omaze experience together. >> we are. >> jimmy: which is interesting, it's a tea? party i guess? >> i thought we were massaging people's feet. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, what? >> tea so is much better. >> jimmy: you can't do that in case people don't have feet to
>> and touch feet on television. >> jimmy: what does it mean, tea party? will it be a real tea party? or one like my daughter has with no tea? >> tea ceremony. in ireland, nothing is done, nothing is achieved without a cup of tea. >> jimmy: is that true? >> that's for sure. the peace process wouldn't happen without a cup of tea. everything is done with a cup of tea. >> whenever there's a panic, put the kettle on. >> jimmy: who will make the tea will the two of you team up to actually make the tea? >> we will. i think we should. >> i'm hip to doing my share, i'll put on the kettle. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: so if people enter to win this particular contest, they will come -- where will you meet them? will you go to their home? or they come to you? >> i think we should go to bono's house. [ cheers and applause ] >> that's good. okay. >> no, but the whole thing will be, we said you bring your problems and we will bring the
blindfolded and taken to bono's house. [ laughter ] where you will have tea with bono and julia roberts. you will be blindfolded again, then who knows. you might get a foot massage, god only knows. we're going to take a break. we have some of your other friends here, more omaze experiences. this is our red shop-a-thon. bono and julia roberts. be right back with channing tatum and dj khaled! [ cheers and applause ] ? g ten years later, nothing's really changed. it's time to snap out of it. hello moto. snap on a jbl speaker. put a 70" screen on a wall. get a 10x optical zoom. get excited world. hello moto. moto is here. the new moto z with motomods. save up to $400 when you trade in your old phone and switch to verizon.
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>> jimmy: welcome back. our second annual red show is rolling along. bono, julia roberts are here. our next special friend is a major movie star with the "21 jump street" and "magic mike." please say hello to channing tatum! [ cheers and applause ] ? >> jimmy: channing, first of all -- [ cheers and applause ] i feel like i speak on behalf of all of us when i say, you are adorable when you sleep. [ cheers and applause ] >> i feel adorable, i do. i feel really adorable. >> jimmy: have you ever slept on television before? >> all the time.
>> jimmy: you have an omaze experience that could potentially kill a woman. you will take a person to las vegas to see the "magic mike" show. what is the show? this is not like "siegfried and roy" type magic? >> it might be. there's magic involved. sorry, bad joke. >> ha ha ha! i just got that. ha ha! >> it is going to completely change anything that you might think you know about male entertainment. >> jimmy: in what way? >> there will be no firemen, no -- >> jimmy: no firemen! what if there's a fire? >> no irish people? >> jimmy: it's discriminatory not to have firemen in the show. you're saying that's kind of cliche? >> it's antiquated, yeah. >> no police? >> maybe some police. >> an umbrella?
>> i think there was an umbrella -- >> jimmy: what you're saying is male strippers in his show are going to be physically obese. people that are out of shape? >> all of them. equal opportunity for everyone. >> jimmy: you put in the show -- are you actually picking the dancers? how involved are you? >> yeah, i'm directing the show. >> jimmy: you're directing the show, for real? >> uh-huh. >> jimmy: do you do auditions? >> doing auditions. if i ever get back in shape i'm going to be in the show. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. and then somebody will come to th beside you -- >> truly, there's no rules. i mean, everything stays in vegas, right? [ cheers and applause ] everything's going to go as it goes. >> just one person goes to the show? >> it's like 18 guys for one person. [ cheers and applause ] >> sounds terrifying. >> jimmy: sounds like a series of lawsuits waiting to happen. well, we have another special guest with another omaze
he makes music, he is a snapchat savant, he's the reason i wear cocoa butter every day. he has major keys to share with us tonight. please welcome dj khaled! [ cheers and applause ] ? >> jimmy: look at this. let me just say, now, i think your magic mike show, right? >> i don't know, i'm not sure. the ladies do love me. >> jimmy: they do love you. would you be open to sharing your body with las vegas? >> we could talk later. >> jimmy: by the way, congratulations, you just had a baby. [ cheers and applause ] you had the baby on snapchat. >> my biggest blessing ever is my son. son, life you so much. i know you're going to see this amazing show. my son has brought so much joy to me. >> jimmy: how old is he now?
>> jimmy: oh, nice. now you are offering as your omaze experience a jet ski trip with you. famously on snapchat you got lost in the night on your jet ski. we have a video, a short video from that incident. >> it's so real out here right now. the only reason why you see anything is because i got the flash on. the key is to make it. the key is not to drive your jet ski in the dark. [ laughter ] it's against the law. i understand that. this ain't right [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, it ain't right. it's an important key. >> yes. >> jimmy: will you teach your son that valuable lesson, not to drive a jet ski in the dark? >> absolutely. definitely not a jet ski in the dark. but the jet ski brings so much joy. >> jimmy: you've got to give him at tiny little jet ski. how old, 6 months he can get on the jet ski? >> i would say 7. >> jimmy: this experience, jet skiing with you, will people be riding on the jet ski with you? >> absolutely. so we're going to ride the jet ski.
and while we're riding the jet ski, while we snapping, it is smooth that day, i'm going to explain saying sometimes life is smooth. when the water's rough -- [ laughter ] when the water's rough, i'm going to explain to them, it can get rough. but the key is to weather all current. waves, storms. and we should never give and up never surrender. i'm going to take them through the pathway for more success. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: the philosophy as well. >> yes. it's all about uplifting. know what i'm saying? >> jimmy: you will be uplifting people. what if they start throwing up while you teach these lessons? >> the key is please don't throw up on me. >> jimmy: that's a great lesson, please don't throw up on dj khaled. when we come back, everybody's involved in a performance that will change the way you think about your life. bono, julia roberts, halsey, the killers, kristen bell, neil patrick harris, dj khaled and
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[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: there, perfect. now everything is just right for my guests. [ doorbell ] that must be all of them at once! come on in. oh, wow! look at this. welcome, welcome. welcome, welcome. hi, guys. hi, guys. how are you? how are you? welcome. i have a little favor to ask. i was thinking before we get to the hors d'ouevres and get right to a song! you play piano right? >> i'm always up for a song. >> jimmy: tickle the ivories or whatever you do and we'll make up a song. >> make it up as we go? >> jimmy: i've been working on one, i'll be honest. goes a little something like this. ? the snow is blowin' that son of a bitch inside it's glowin'
? we're nice and cozy we jing jing jingle the bell ? ? ooh, baby it's cold but we're going to hell ? ? i fill my hot tub with dom perignon my frappucinos delivered by drone ? ? 'tis the season and we've all done so well ? ? but this time our sleigh ride is goin' to hell ? ? we've got jimmy choos and rooms with views we got bags and pearls and scotch ? ? we got major key and as you
? we've got ferraris and a weekend home in carmel ? ? but if we don't help people with aids we're going to hell ? >> say neil, any chance we can get you to do some dancing over there? come on channing. >> come on, let's cut a rug. >> well, i didn't wear my tap shoes for nothing! >> perfect. >> dance with me, channing, hit it! ? >> jimmy: hey, guys? guys, guys, guys? guys, you're tap dancing on a carpet, no one can actually hear the tapping. >> you don't hear it? >> jimmy: we'll put it in later, you'll be fine. >> thanks, jimmy. >> jimmy: no problem, you were terrific! i like that kind of dancing, don't you, folks? ? i get lobster tails and caviar
? they serve it on fine china i throw it on the ground ? ? i get real cozy with all of the ladies ? ? but if you don't start helping out you're going to hades ? ? i got a room full of weights ? ? with solid gold plates ? thor ? ? cuban cigars ? ? energy bars ? and a hat that says sucks to be poor ? ? we've got mercedes bentleys wear perfume so we never smell ? ? ooh baby it's blowin' ? ? but our pockets keep growing ? ? our muscles are showing ?
? if we don't help people with aids we're going to hell ? [ cheers and applause ] ? ? welcome into my cauldron of sin i've been admiring how selfish ? yourself and now ? ? you're here with me in helf ? >> jimmy: hold on, what? did you say ?helf?? >> yes. >> jimmy: that's not a word. there's no helf. >> it's gaelic. >> jimmy: oh. sorry. ? this is a warning to those who are greedy ? ? to those who forget those who are needy watch out you're going
? for christmas my gift is one second pass or you'll wind up ? ? down here with me on your ass ? ? ooh baby it's blowin but our pockets keep growin ? ? if we don't help people with aids we're goin' to hell ? ? if we don't help people with aids we're going to hell ? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: it's true. it's really true. we'll be right back. to hell and back!
halsey, thank you, you sang beautifully. thanks to neil patrick harris, channing tatum, your dancing is wonderful as always. and my friend kristen bell. thank you so much. i want to apologize to matt damon, we did run out of time, and also he doesn't care about other people so he wasn't here tonight. "nightline" is next, thank you for watching, good night, everybody!
this is a special edition of "nightline." "code 3:the heroes of san bernardino." one year later. >> i looked around. i think i'm the first one here. >> the holiday party terror attack that killed 14 and wounded 22. >> there's people with machine guns shooting up at my work. >> new evidence intent. new details about those terrifying minutes from brave first responders. >> i looked down at her and i said, you're not going to die today. >> a grateful survivor saved on the scene. >> i said, please come here, help me. >> the car chase. >> shots fired. >> and shoot-out that ended it out. >> i kept shooting until he stopped moving. >> plus meet the good samaritan who helped take down the terrorists. >> something wasn't quite right.