tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC February 17, 2016 11:34pm-12:37am EST
"the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his guests -- jennifer lopez. snoop dogg. musical guest zayn. and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 419 toledo! woo! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, hey, welcome! [ screams and applause ] thank you!
hey, looking good. looking good! welcome, welcome, welcome to "the tonight show," everybody. this is it. you're here. [ cheers and applause ] let's get to some news here, you guys. i saw that the pope said mass today in mexico and as many as 200,000 people were expected to cross the u.s./mexico border to hear him speak. [ light laughter ] and the pope pulled off his mask and said -- "gotcha! now you're back in mexico. adios amigos!" [ laughter and applause ] did you see this yesterday? during a speech hillary clinton had a coughing fit that lasted for four minutes. some people said her cough was kind of distracting. i don't know. you be the judge. [ dog barking ] [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's an unusual -- that's not the right clip. i think we played the wrong clip. that's an unusual cough. >> steve: that's a rough cough.
>> jimmy: that's right, hillary clinton had a coughing fit during a speech and the crowd actually chanted her name as she opened a cough drop. [ laughter ] yeah. she got applause for choking -- [ light laughter ] or as jeb put it, "must be nice." [ laughter ] [ applause ] i think i might have pulled something on that last joke. actually, i'm not sure i can go on. [ audience aws ] well, this is "the tonight show." the monologue has to go on. [ laughter ] i need somebody to tag in for me. can anyone tag in? can you help me out? [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you! thank you very much. jimmy! thank you. [ cheers and applause ] thank you. as you know, jimmy -- jimmy were talking about the election, to quote a famous president.
>> got my first robocall this week. said, "hi, this is bill clinton. can hillary count on you?" count on me? she can't even count on bill. [ laughter ] don't drag me into your marital problems, pal. [ applause ] this e-mail -- this e-mail problem continues to dog hillary, but she says it's just an honest mistake. you ever notice the only time people in washington are honest is when they make a mistake? why is that? [ laughter ] plus, hillary says she has been tested. well, i hope so. you never know what bill might bring home. sheesh. [ laughter and applause ] well, after his big win in new hampshire, they say hillary's team is trying to dig up dirt on bernie sanders. ooh. [ audience oohs ] you know what you call someone who digs up dirt on bernie sanders? an archeologist. [ laughter ] but the big decision for
president. it's important because whoever he chooses is just a prostate away from being the next president of the united states. that's right. [ laughter and applause ] and let me ask you something. what is going on with the republicans? i watch these debates. trump attacks cruz. rubio goes after bush. bush gets into a fight with trump. remember the good old days when the republicans were all united against the poor and the minorities? what happened? [ laughter ] what happened there? [ applause ] and ted cruz -- oh, you hear about this? oh, boy. ted cruz's campaign pulled one of their tv commercial because the actress in the ad was a a porn star. [ audience ohs ] the campaign said they hired the porn star because they thought she could make ted cruz easier to swallow. i don't know. [ audience ohs ] [ applause ] >> cruz! >> i don't care. they can't fire me.
[ applause ] as if we don't have enough problems, listen to this. this is a big issue in this campaign. scientists from john hopkins university say that global warming may cause an increase in cases of diarrhea worldwide. [ laughter ] you know what that means? global warming has gone from our number one problem to our number two problem. [ laughter and applause ] global warming is so bad vladimir putin is now topless and bottomless. that's how bad it is. in fact, the earth is as hot as it's ever been. >> audience: how hot is it? >> it is so hot, bill cosby is slipping his dates chill pills. that's how hot it is. it is so hot immigrants are coming across the border on slip and slides. that's how hot it is. it is so hot, donald trump hit on megyn kelly just to get the cold shoulder. that's how hot it is, ladies and gentlemen. [ applause ] thank you, jimmy. thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you. i appreciate that.
there. it is so hot donald trump is building a wall just for the shade. >> yes! [ applause ] >> jimmy: it is so hot steve harvey says it's cold. >> yes. [ laughter ] [ laughter ] >> steve: this is cold! >> jimmy: he says it is so hot instead of red lobster beyonce is taking his ass to dairy queen. >> yes! >> jimmy: jay leno, everybody, right there! [ cheers and applause ] jay leno! thank you, buddy, i appreciate that. want to stick around for a bit? want to -- >> what? >> jimmy: want to stick around for a little bit? >> no, i got stuff to do. i can't stick around. you're on your own. see you later. goodbye, everybody! >> jimmy: we have a great show. give it up for the roots right there, everybody!
[ cheers and applause ]how great was that? jay leno, everybody, once again! oh, my goodness. [ cheers ] thank you for helping us out with that bit.. >> jimmy: jay leno. oh, he's the best. jay is currently filming his 12-part series for cnbc "jay leno's garage."l be performing at the king center for performing arts in melbourne, florida. check him out. if you have not seem him live, he's the best.e ] jay leno, thank you, buddy. that's the best. we had to call him.ring him all week. like, "please do something." yeah. it's great to be out in l.a. and just to do stuff like that. so we're happy to be here. thanks for having us here in uys. [ cheers and applause ] it's exciting for us. last night -- last night i went to -- me and miles, our head did i tell you last night, the dinner i had? >> steve: oh, my gosh, it was fantastic. >> jimmy: we went to our friends the rowans' last night.had this dinner at their house. and it's just -- it's in malibu. i went to their house, and this is a real, true story.
table -- legends.les was there. mike connors was there, steve lawrence, carol burnett. [ cheers and applause ] bob newhart and tim conway.ng -- [ cheers ] this is a real story. all sitting at the table. it's unbelievable. we walk in. we finish a show.bu, we saw them. we walked in and don rickles goes, "oh, great, it's jimmy kimmel." [ laughter ] jimmy fallon., yeah, no one cares." [ laughter ] everybody was on fire. steve lawrence -- you know he's t man is he a funny human being. he had a thousand jokes. carol burnett started telling a a story about eydie gorme.elling this story, tim conway just raises his hand at dinner. and we go, "yes, tim?" he goes, "can someone cut my meat for me?" [ laughter ] bob newhart goes, "that's green beans, that's not meat." [ laughter ] it was like that all night long, like machine gun comedy. ever.
thank you to all those guys for letting me sit at the table. [ cheers and applause ] me out to los angeles, stuff like that. it was the best night ever. it was so fun. guys, we're gonna back in new and kevin spacey is going to be on the show. and we wanted do this fun thing with him, but i'm gonna need your help. so if you have a kid between and 9, i want you to have them write a story with the title "house of cards." [ light laughter ] write like a scene.t tell your kids what the show is actually about. just have them write a short scene, one or two pages, with other. give them the title "house of cards," and let their imaginations do the rest. when they're done, e-mail it to ow.com. we'll choose our favorites and kevin and i will act them out on our show. it will be fun. so thank you for doing that.pplause ] "house of cards." we've got a big, big, big show tonight, everybody.alented, one of the hardest working people i've ever met.
jennifer lopez is here on the show.e ] >> steve: come on! oh!r in the show, jennifer and i are playing password with some surprise guests. you don't want to miss that. [ cheers ]'s the one and only d-o double g, snoop dogg is stopping by. [ cheers and applause ] >> audience: snoop!bet! hang on, snoopy. and then, making his television debut with us tonight -- i'm so honored, i'm psyched. we love him. great. >> jimmy: music from zayn is here. [ cheers and applause ]a baby. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: he was a child. he was probably about six or seven. some fresh tats. [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah.rlor. >> jimmy: yeah, went into the local kids' -- kid tattoo parlor and got tatted up. [ laughter ] >> steve: they're the best, be very intricate 'cause it's much
>> jimmy: i know, yeah. [ light laughter ] you grow into them, yeah. [ s watching tv the other day, you know, i was just flipping through the channels. and i saw this show on teen nick. it's a show called "ew!" and this --lause ] you've heard of it? yeah, you've heard of this. it's a pretty good show. [ cheers ]e say -- a lot of people say that i look like the main character. [ laughter ] it's a little girl, it's a girl on the show.'s like a 15-year-old girl. i don't know if i see it. well, take a look for yourselves. here's the latest episode of "ew!" [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hi, everyone. welcome to "ew!" i'm sara and if you're wondering, that's s-a-r-a with are ew! [ laughter ] joining us today is one of my bffs.
[ screams and applause ] gabby, what's up? >> not much. i'm just having, like, the >> jimmy: ew! [ laughter ] how come? >> i found out my dad joined snapchat. [ laughter ]: ew! >> ew, i know. and he friended me. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what? ew! what's his name on it?3. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: ew! snapdaddy123? >> i know, right? i was like, "can i live?" [ laughter ] >> jimmy: ew. ew!e snap faces. [ light laughter ] >> okay. >> jimmy: you go first gabby. >> okay. okay. [ laughter ]: let's see it.
[ cheers ] it's great! you're looking great. now it's my turn. ew. ew. >> jimmy: now it's my turn. how is that? how's that? [ laughter ] ew! amazing! >> both: shoulder, shoulder, jump, jump, then we bestie booty bump! [ laughter ] [ cheers ] now it's time for the "ew!" talent show. i'll go first. >> okay.my talent is that i can balance a spoon on my nose. [ laughter ] watch.rs and applause ] there we go! your turn, gabby. >> jimmy: what?
[ cheers ]i'm really shy. >> jimmy: i mean, it's not balancing a spoon on your nose but you -- [ laughter ] -- have to try.you'll never get better if you don't try. [ laughter ] >> ew. okay. >> jimmy: yeah. just try. >> okay. ] >> jimmy: this is embarrassing. [ laughter ]music on it would help. [ cheers and applause ] cheers and applause ] >> hey, girls, those are some pretty nifty moves! [ laughter ] what you doing, the macarena?
a-three and a-four and you do the macarena. heey! you're the macarena. it's my stepdad gary. >> hi, stepdad gary. >> please, call me gary. stepdad gary was my stepdad's name. >> jimmy: ew, gary, get out of here! >> think of the macarena. your mom is upstairs making some popcorn so sound the corn horn! beep beep!rny! [ laughter ] you put some kernels in the pan and you let them pop t them in a bowl and sprinkle salt on top it's a tasty little treat with a serious crunch it's a snackable vegetablench >> both: ew! >> jimmy: get out of here, gary! >> okay! i can take a hint.i'm on chat snap now. my name is snapdaddy124 because somebody already had 123. [ laughter ] get out! >> all right, munchy bunch!
[ cheers ] jimmy: it's time for the "ew!" speed round. are you ready? here we go. leftover candy hearts. >> ew. >> jimmy: yeah. [ laughter ]eard from "the martian." >> ew! so fake. >> jimmy: yeah, uh-huh. yogurt covered raisins. >> ew. >> jimmy: yeah.. >> cute. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: really? >> yeah.really talented actor. have you ever seen "one flew over the cuckoo's nest"? [ light laughter ]over the cuckoo's nest"? [ laughter ] seen that. [ laughter ] finally -- in-n-out burger. [ cheers ] >> love it!t one from l.a.! >> jimmy: gimme it! that's all the time we have for "ew!" i wanna thank gabby for joining
tune in next week. ew! [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: okay, i guess i can see the resemblance there. anyway, stick around. we'll be right back with jennifer lopez, ladies and gentlemen! come on back! was the first capital. oh, honey... no wait, did ne? it's time to mix it up. do it, dad! yeah, do it! there are thousands of ways ealth care system. it was frozen. daddy's hand looks funny. and choosing unitedhealthcare can help make it simpler by letting you knowen processed. yo, adrian. still not funny. unitedhealthcare from one of those major carriers. straight talk wireless uses the same cell towers they do. but we don't build or maintain them.
the cost! out here... ...and here... and here. p well, not here.pthat would be weird. ght talk. best phones. best networks. half the cost. make your tax return go furthermsung galaxy grand prime. unlimited talk, text and data is just $45 a month. find out more at straighttalkswitch.com hat do you think? '! (store p.a.) attention shoppers, men's department. (vo) there's a great big un-khaki world out there. explore it in a subaru crosstrek. love.makes a subaru, a subaru. so my kids don't have to forage, got two jobs to pay a mortgage,
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest is aglobe award nominated artist who you can see every week on the farewell season of fox's "american idol."return to las vegas to continue her hugely successful, sold-out residency at planet hollywood. new series "shades of blue" which airs thursdays at 10pm right here on nbc. [ cheers and applause ]tlemen, please welcome the very busy, the very lovely, jennifer lopez!
>> jimmy: this coast loves you, east coast loves you, you gotta a lot of love. thank you for being on the show. you look gorgeous.! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: stunning as always. >> you're so sweet. but you go all out. here are some shots of what las vegas show. >> oh, god. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: look at that. come on. [ cheers ] jenny from the block right there. >> jimmy: a little bronx right there. everything is in the show. >> y a treat for me to be able to put together a show for vegas that's really different then touring and doing concerts and stuff.re intimate room. it's vegas. like frank sinatra and ann margret and all these people.
>> you know what i mean?ng. >> jimmy: you're getting crazy good reviews, congratulations. >> it's been amazing. >> jimmy: it's a lot of work. >> it's a lot of work.show that's so hard for myself. >> jimmy: i know, it's like this is your fault. >> i'm like, this is going to be so good. s, this, this, and this. then at the end of the show i'm like dead. >> jimmy: exhausted. >> i'm like, oh my god, i have orrow? [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: you're going back in may. >> you have to come see it. >> jimmy: i'm going to come. planet hollywood. [ cheers ] of energy. >> jimmy: so happy for you. and "shades of blue" on nbc, we couldn't be more happy. thank you, thank you, thank you nt hit show. >> ray liotta, myself. >> jimmy: i love ray liotta man. >> he is so intense.t. he's perfectly cast. for those who haven't seen it do you want to set it up? >> i'm a cop who is very loyal to her family of cops, very --d up by the
for you guys who haven't seen it. in the first episode by the fbi to turn on her crew. and it just becomes this for her of how she stays out of jail to take care of her daughter. it's just -- it's really riveting.nse, ray liotta plays my captain and my boss, my lieutenant wosniak and he is -- know something. he might not. >> he's trying to figure out. he gets word that there might be a rat in his crew and he goes ballistic.of-- yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: total ray liotta -- >> like, you haven't seen him like this in years. he is brilliant.much fun to work with him. >> jimmy: it's a great show. i want to show everyone a clip. here's jennifer lopez and ray liotta in the nbc series "shades of blue."his. >> did you do it? >> harley. >> did you? >> i told you. kovach's got the jump on them. they fought. sap shot him. over. >> no, you're lying.
>> you were ready to kill me three days ago. >> and i would have killed you today, but i didn't.kovach do it. >> harley, he's my friend, too. and a cop. you don't think i tried to save him? i was a step behind, but i had i'm sick over this. it's just senseless and infuriating but it also may be disguise. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: he's good. >> that line. it also may be a blessing in disguise. oh, my gosh. you should see it. it's a really good show. n say. thank you, nbc. >> jimmy: can we play a game? do you mind playing a game with me? >> sure! [ cheers and applause ] be fun? jennifer and i are playing password with some surprise guests after the break. stick around everybody.
ch on iphone 6s responds to the pressure of your finger. so you can do a ton of stuff in a lot less time. like look at a site without going to it. out opening it. you can do pretty much everything faster. shooting stuff. music stuff. couch shopping. shoe shopping. running.checking a flight from an email. i'm peeking my flight. i'm not peeking my flight. i'm peeking my...wait, i missed my flight. owl photos. desert photos. photos of... a high-stepping man. pizza gifs. it's all faster with 3d touch on iphone 6s. es of jim beam, thousands of barrels lay silent. but that doesn't mean they lay idle.
the bourbon is aging, building a fuller, smoother flavor, ged four long years. at jim beam, ade from the inside. how will you make yours? , this is the time. and your ford dealer is the place, to get 0% financing for 60 months on a ford suv. that's right. just announced.ge...escape... and expedition... are available with 0% financing for 60 months. ford suvs. designed to help you be unstoppable.america's best selling brand. but hurry, 0% financing for 60 months me offer. see your ford dealer today.
[ cheers and applause ] >> steve: welcome back to , everybody. i'm your host steve higgins. and we're about to play a big game of "password." [ cheers and applause ]t team. she's a judge on "american idol," she has a hugely successful residency in "shades of blue", right here on nbc. say hello to jennifer lopez! [ cheers and applause ]: jennifer, your partner this evening is the host of nbc's "tonight show" and saugerties sweetheart, jimmy fallon. e ] >> steve: oh, fantastic. how you feeling? how you feeling tonight, jimmy? that's gt -- [ laughter ] your first opponent is our very
[ cheers and applause ]: and quest, your partner this evening hosts her very own talk show, "kocktails with khloe," which airs wednesdays at 10:00 pm on fyi. please welcome an! [ cheers and applause ]e! >> jimmy: khloe. come on.right here. this is it. this is l.a. here we go. we're all here to play "password", everybody. let's do it! [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: the rules of the game are very simple. i will give each of you a a password. then each of you are to give a a one-word clue -- one word our partner to guess the password. if the clue is illegal, as determined by our judges, you shall hear this. [ buzzer ]he turn. the team with the most points after four words wins.
>> steve: okay, great. [ laughter ] first clue goes to jennifer and khloe. >> the password is jail. >> steve: jennifer, we're going to start with you? why me? ugh! >> jimmy: okay. >> okay. >> jimmy: okay. >> ready? >> jimmy: yeah. okay. >> big -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: big --g booty. >> steve: no! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: no. that is --your mind out of the gutter. >> jimmy: last time -- >> steve: i am -- no, i don't want to hear it! i do not want to hear it. that's rude! [ laughter ] >> cuestlove: cool. >> jimmy: cool. >> steve: the clue is cool. >> questlove: khloe. i don't know.
okay, back over to jennifer. >> ice. >> jimmy: snowstorm. >> steve: oh. three points. back to khloe. >> jimmy: oh.this barn is on fire. >> cold. >> questlove: cold. [ laughter ] cool, cold. ] skating rink. >> steve: skating rink, no. two points. go again? >> steve: yes, you can. jennifer, two points. >> okay, ready? >> jimmy: yeah. >> watch. relax. >> jimmy: relax. big. ice. >> relax. >> jimmy: relax. big, cool, ice, relax, cold. >> relax!: chill! [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh, my goodness!dn't even know why it was that --
>> jimmy: i got chill -- >> the big chill? to a -- >> steve: jimmy and quest. >> jimmy: all right, here we go. >> the password is drizzle. >> steve: quest, you will begin. [ laughter ]love: wizzet? [ laughter ] >> what? [ laughter and applause ] >> questlove: wizzet? [ laughter ] >> steve: i think she heard you. >> jimmy: where's snoop dog when you need him? [ laughter ] >> i have no idea. >> jimmy: rain. wizzet. [ laughter ] >> steve: no, no.you can't use that -- >> jimmy: i said rain. i said rain. i said he said wizzet. and i said rain. >> wet? no. no. back to quest. four points.
>> questlove: drizzop.ing ] >> jimmy: judges? [ ding ]aid said he can still use that? >> questlove: yes, i know i can say that. yes. >> okay. so -- >> questlove: drizzop. [ laughter ] drizzop. >> jimmy: yes. that's it. that's her guess is rain. >> what? >> jimmy: that's it right there. >> you said rain. matter! ready? >> i'm so confused. >> jimmy: i can't believe you got away with that. sprizzle. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> what?u're welcome. you're welcome. >> steve: sprizzle. >> questlove: you're welcome. >> steve: oh my gosh. jennifer -- >> jimmy: just a sprizzle. >> listen. >> the password is rod -- >> steve: khloe, we're going to start with you.
>> stort.stort? >> stort. >> questlove: stort. >> stort. >> questlove: stort? stewart? [ laughter ] >> stort. >> stort. it right? stort. >> questlove: store it? stort? [ laughter ] heard of this. >> stewart. >> questlove: drizzle. >> stewart. >> questlove: stort? >> steve: oh god.ow. >> questlove: all right, stewart. >> stewart. >> questlove: mouse? >> steve: no. [ laughter ] five points.er. >> jimmy: i've never heard of these words. >> out sprizzle. >> she said stewart. >> jimmy: yeah. >> stewart. hot. hot. >> jimmy: hot blank. hot stewart. [ laughter ] >> yes! yes! you got it.d. [ laughter ] [ applause ] do it again. >> jimmy: no, cause i'm thinking hot, i'm thinking of rod stewart. >> yes!
e ] >> steve: that's a 10-0. >> jimmy: it's a shut out, we won! [ cheers and applause ]k jennifer lopez, khloe kardashian. [ cheers and applause ] we'll be right back with more of "the tonight show." stick around everybody. that was the best.use ] ral? yeah. it's too good to be true. not again. real estate never goes down. fact.y, and i'll have my band, and it'll just work. right. don't worry about it honey. all of our family photos are right here (banging soudrive. it's called a timeshare. we don't own it, we share it. let's do it. oh yeah. that is good. - mm-hmm. hat's not too good to be true. it's oscar mayer natural turkey breast,
new schick hydro versus the lube strip. ir that gives you 40% less friction. it's designed like no other razor to protect from irritation. sorry, lube strip. . free your skin . folks, you can't make this stuff up. four bandits chose a prius as their getaway car. bravo-niner, in pursuit of a toyota prius. over.catch a prius? over. this thing is actually pretty fast. over. very funny. mer's market. we should get some flowers for the car. yeah! holly! . let's go places. piano music.ad you finally made it, dad. you have to experience this city. that's what you always say. you were right about the food. hi john. hey kevin.
one more. it's beautiful, isn't it? home? done! done. book priceless experiences around the globe with... ...your world mastercard. only at priceless.com. hmmm... apple pie with only fruits nuts and spices. this makes the rest of my life feel very complicated. de from food. est every ship in the caribbean but hurry, this offer won't last long caribbean book today at
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: so this -- this is areal thing that's happening right now. this never happens to us in new york, but here in l.a. guests really do get stuck in traffic? [ laughter ] happened tonight with snoop dogg. [ audience aws ] he's stuck on the 405, which you all can probably relate to. but we lucked out. get to talk to one of my favorite comedians and one of the greatest talk show hosts of all time. let's give a warm "tonight one and
[ cheers and applause ] >> i was at the gate! [ laughter ] i'm saying to the guy -- and in the rear view mirror i see your producer like this -- i go, "something's going on." open the gate! open the gate! no, no, open the gate! and he grabs me. just when you think you're out, they pull you back in. [ laughter ]ome -- welcome. thank you -- thank you so much. thank you so much. >> you were talking about your dinner with rickles and newhart.. >> you know, i love these guys. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and the fun part is when you talk to those guys, i'm probably the youngest of those guys. [ laughter ]n i'm probably the last guy to work the clubs
because when those guys had it, and the mob was different than like the marriott corporation or something now. [ laughter ] i mean it was just a little bit different.e first gigs i did was in chicago. there used to be a club called mr. kelly's. you know, huge club in chicago. first out of town gigs. and i was opening for freda payne. do you remember her? she had a song called "band of gold" back in the day --ourse. yeah. band of gold >> so -- exactly. [ laughter ] so i -- i get to the club and i see the marquee. it says friday, saturday, ne and jay l no. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: so l no. i say, "the owner here?" he goes, "what do you want?" i said, "i'm jay leno." he goes, "i know that." i said, "you spelled my name wrong on the sign."pell your name wrong." i said, "well there's an 'e' missing." he goes, "i know that." he said, "but we're out of es. freda payne took all the es." [ laughter ]: sorry, we used all the es. >> we used all the es.
buy another 'e'?" and then he gives -- and then he starts doing this -- there's some kind of alphabet store? you go down you buy es? that what you think?" [ laughter ] and then he says -- and then he "you know, e is one of the most popular letters in the alphabet. okay? even if there was a store, they " so, he says, "for the next three days, you're jay l no. so shut up and it's jay l no." [ laughter ] that night it was jay l no. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly.ne of these." i want to hear this -- you have this nobel peace prize ceremony. this is in norway. you were just in norway. >> yeah.t asked to do the -- to host the -- i don't know why they ask me to host the nobel peace prize thing, but it was -- it was an honor. okay?ver had a a comedian do it. [ light laughter ] so they say to me, "you have to meet with the nobel committee." jokes past the nobel committee. >> jimmy: yeah, okay. >> so i get to oslo and go into the oslo town hall. guys that look like sigmund freud sitting there.
they go, "mr. leno, you have to understand, because of the no mockery, no ridicule, no insults. that is our rule when you host." so i write a jo -- i said, "how about this joke?" they told me i couldn't do any mockery, any ridiculing, insults. . so the guy goes, "but wait. if you leave, who will then do the show?" [ laughter ]o." i said, "i'm not really leaving." and then the comedy guy goes, "magnus, the amusement is that e." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this is a nightmare.gh it. it was just -- and you know the nobel peace prize committee, the room was very small where ards. and it's like, you know when you watch "star trek" and have the federation of planets. there's a guy with a pointed h a a dashiki, another guy with --
>> jimmy: it's a great gig. >> but it's i mean there's -- there's only five million people in all of norway. >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah. it's like an apartment in new york.ond -- you know. and people are friendly and it's very -- it was a wonderful experience. >> jimmy: so, you'd go back and do it again. t again. sure. sure. >> jimmy: would you do our show again? >> i'm doing it again. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: not only are you -- >> i just did it again.e ] >> jimmy: not only are you a a great host, you're a great guest and i owe you one, buddy. >> no, you don't owe me anything. in a a million. i love this guy right here. >> can i go now? can i leave now? [ cheers and applause ] i am leaving! >> jimmy: thank you., "jay leno's garage" -- >> open the gate! >> jimmy: returns to cnbc this spring. >> open the damn gate! >> jimmy: snoop dogg right there everybody.for us after the break. stick around, everybody. snoop dogg! [ cheers and applause ]
maybe a little less expensive? absolutely. please. well, check out yelp. we need a great body shop. my wife just hit a deer. he just froze. it's cool. we know just the place. i guess i need... golf... lessons? [ka-boom!] that looks rad. whatever you need... ... check yelp first. we know just the place. can't get unlimited data for your family? other carriers either don't offer it, or it's too expensive! not t-mobile!nes of unlimited 4g lte data for just fifty bucks each, and get a fourth line, free! hurry. only at t-mobile. ' s a taste so bold, yet so smooth, it could only be called, black silk, from folgers. a taste you could enjoy, p at a time. black silk, from folgers.
yeah? (sigh) you're okay... he's okay, he made it! jason.. what do you mean? we were very bad boys.e news? alexa: here's the news, "alec baldwin and jason schwartzman were seen mooning paparazzi. baldwin threw his shoe at photographers before making a run for it". my poor cashmere socks...der another pair of brescianis. reordering bresciani socks. okay listen... something? (moaning) ...alec? the bold nissan rogue, with intuitive all-wheel drive. a hero. now get a $189 per month lease on the 2016 nissan rogue. nissan. that excites.
can't get unlimited data fother carriers either don't offer it, or it's too expensive! not t-mobile! get three lines of unlimited 4g lte data for just fifty bucks each, and get a fourth line, free!only at t-mobile. so what's your news? i got a job! i'll be programming at ge. . (friends gasp) the app where you put fruit hats on animals? i love that! guys, i'll be writing code e. (interrupting) i just zazzied you. (phone vibrates) look at it! (friends giggle) i can do dogs, you name it. i'm going to transform the way the world works. (proudly) i programmed that hat. and i can do casaba melons. i'll be helping turbines power cities. i put a turbine on a cat. (friends ooh and ahh)tals run more efficiently...
have a great night.morrow. bye-bye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] er: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- comedian hannibal burress, music from dustin lynch, featuring theth fred armisen. ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers!pplause ] >> seth: good evening, i'm seth meyers, this is "late night." how's everybody doin' tonight? [ cheers and applause ]ic, let's get to the news.