Skip to main content

tv   The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon  NBC  March 19, 2019 11:34pm-12:37am EDT

11:34 pm
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center in the heart of new york city, it's "the tonight show starring jimmy fallon." tonight, join jimmy and his guests -- kobe bryant, aidy bryant,
11:35 pm
natalie morales, musical guest fletcher, and featuring the lendary roots crew. steve: and now, here he is, jimmfallon! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: oh, that's what i'm >> jimmy: oh, that's what i'm in taabout right there. welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. welcome to "the tonight show", everybody. this is it. [ cheers and applause ] give it up for the roots right there. a
11:36 pm
[ cheers alause ] good news, you guys, tomorrow is the first day of spring. that's right. [ cheers and applause ] finally. i love spring. it's that special time of year when you go from flu season directly into allergy season. it's like -- [ sneezes ] i love you, earth. i don't even know how to sneeze any more.ev you can' sneeze like that. >> steve: no, you can't. >> jimmy: you got to sneeze like this. how do you sneeze? >> steve: i usually sneeze like this. [ sneezes ] [ laughter ]wh ever gets it -- yeah. >> jimmy: just right on people. >> steve: you know what? i sneezed. >> jimmy: i do that, but ishi'm wearing t sleeved shirt, you just get spit everywhere. [ laughter ] i got a decent sneeze too. >> steve: you do. yo >> jimmy: it's like -- [ sneezes ] you know? [ light laughter ] my grandfather had the loudest sneeze. heeeas like -- [ s ] [ laughter ] it was like a language from "game of thrones" or something. [ light lauger ] it was - yeah. i think that's better than people that hold the sneeze in. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: it's like -- [ lahter ] that's got to go somewhere. right? you know? [ laughter ] >> steve: yeah.kn yo where that goes. >> jimmy: that's got to build up. and then at, like, 2:00 in the morning, like -- baahh! what? >> steve: i got a hemorrhoid.
11:37 pm
laughter ] >> jimmy: that is right, though. spring officially starts tomorrow and this was nice. today, three more democrats came out of hibernation and announced they're running for president. >> steve: aw. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's great. it makes it 63 people running id for prt. >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: fantastic. [ light laughter ] there's so many democrats running.e the newest candidates, beto o'rourke, is already raising tons of money. and he's g a lot of buzz. but voters want to know what issues he stands for. at ts point, people don't kn what beto stands for, but they know what he stands on. he stands on counters. he stands on tables. [ laughter ]ta hes on tv stands. why is he standing on -- the man six-foot-four. you don't need to stand on anything. you're basically always standing on something. [ cheers and applause ] how much taller does he have to be? there's another stndidate who's ting to get some attention named andrew yang. apparently he wants to give every american a thousand dollars a month by taxing companies like gooe. [ cheers and applause ]
11:38 pm
if you want to read more about andrew yang, you should search for him on yahoo, because his nameas just completely erase from google. [ laughter and applause ] he doesn't exist on google. he's not -- well some candidates do have es some intng ideas. last night, elizabeth warren said she wants to get rid of the electoral college. when the president heard that, he was like, "we can't get rid of the electoral college.ck i them to go all the way in march madness. [ laughter and applause ] they're gonna beat duke." but a lot of people want to get rid of the electoral college. which is too bad, because it's the only college left that parents can't bribe their way into. [ cheers ] ♪ >> steve: oh, snap! dang! dang! >> jimmy: but all the cable networks are busy covering the election. i want to y congrats to c-span for turning 40-years-old today. [ applause ] it's exciting. that means c-span is only 40 more years away from being ag the averagof someone who watches c-span. isn't that just amazing? [ laughter and applause ]
11:39 pm
it just came out that the president wants to ssh funding for pbs. [ audience aws ] yeah, and pbs characters aren't happy. today, the count was like, "i have one. one finger i'd like to show present trump. [ cheers and applause ] mwah ah-ah-ah-ah." but trump's been busy. today he met with the brazilian president. but when they first saw the word brazilian listed on trump's schedule, people though, "uh-oh, it's date night." [ audience ohs ] [ laughter ] you guys hear about this -- [ laughter ] >> steve: "save some of that." [ light laughter ] >> jmy: you guys hear about this? florida prosecutors are now offering to drop prostitution charges against new england o patrioers robert kraft for visiting that massage parlor. but unfortunat the news, kraft celebrated by going back to the massage or pa [ laughter and applause ] "i'll have the usual.
11:40 pm
thank you."ik it looksthe charges against kraft are getting dropped. so good for him. he got off t[ ce in one day. dience ohs ] >> steve: oh! >> jimmy: oh, you know you like it. >> steve: come on. [ laughter and appla >> jimmy: back to the president. in a recent meeting, trump said aat he doesn't like self-driving car even acted out driving one and crashing it. [ light laughter ] trump does that a lot. he uses his hands to act out whatever he's talking about. we thought it would be fun to turn that into a game. it's time for "presidential e arades." here. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ charades presidential presidential charades ♪ >> jimmy: all right. here's how this works. i'm going to show you a clip ofn prestrump acting something out, and you have to guess what he's really talking about. okay if you get it right, you win a pair of hand clappers, because trump loves talking with his hands. if you're wrong, those hand edappers are going to be g shut. okay, raise your hand if you want to play "presidential charades." you want to play right here?
11:41 pm
sure, come on up here. sorry, buddy. well, maybe it would help. thank you. [ laughter ] yeah. hey, how are you? what's your name? >> sarah. y>> jimmy: sarah, where a from? >> connecticut. >> jimmy: connecticut, very good. all right, now the first question here. what is prident trump acting out right here? take a look at this. ♪ now, is he talking abo a, the helmets he wants his space force to wear. b, senator marco rio's big floppy ears, or c, the size of his own, quote, "beautiful brain." >> c. >> jimmy: the size of his brain? let's find out. h >> thank ghas really large ears. the biggest ears i've ever seen. [ buzzer ] because they we protecting him. it was going -- >> jimmy: he's making fun of marco rubio's ears. at was incorrect. here are your non-clapping hand clappers. [ laughter and applause ] thank you for playing. i appreciate it. you want it? yeah. come on, come on. [ applause ] take your time. hey. >> hi. do>> jimmy: hi, how are yog? [ light laughter ] how are you? >> i'm good, how are you? >> jimmy: i'm great. oh, my. [ laughter ]
11:42 pm
what is your name and where -- here, hold this. it will give you something to do. [ light laughter ] what is your name and where are om? >> i'm anna, and i'm from st. louis, missouri. >> jimmy: hey, st. louis! come on. [ cheers and applause ] congrats on getting the march madness ther all right. here we go right here. what is president trump acting out in this clip? ♪ all right. is he talking about el chapo escaping jail through the sewage system? is he talking about sending troops to space? or is he talking about going in for a handshake and then switching to a high five? >> totally a. el chapo all the way. >> jimmy: el chapo all the way? >> el chapo. >> jimmy: let's find out. >> they did catch el chapo. that's good. >> jimmy: hey! [ ding ] >> i don't know. better not escape again -- [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: wow, you knew what you were talking about. "you go the sewer, and boom, get out of there." there it is. here are you real clappers. [ cheers and applause ] they make noise. hey, awesome. ank you very much. appreciate it. thank you, thank you. anyone down here? ♪ yeah. [ cheers ] the game is very easy. hi, how are you? >> good.
11:43 pm
how are you? >> jimmy: i'm great. what is your name and where are you from? >> i'mm sabella. and om cincinnati, ohio. >> hey, cincinnati, ohio! [ applause ] we love that -- what is it? you have chili on spaghetti there, don't you? >>eah. >> jimmy: yeah, it's great. all right. good. all right. here's the last question. what is trump acting out right here? ♪ is he talking about a, a bear that he saw at the zoo? [ light laughter ] is he talking about b, trying to get into a dunkin' donuts that was locked? or is he talking about c, his presidential opponents falling off a cliff? >> i say c. >> jimmy: c. let's find out. >> i mean, the two last ones, they're ke, hanging by their fingertips. >> jimmy: that's correct. that is it. [ ding ] >> they're chock ag. [ chee applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: here is your working hand clapper. >> thank you. >> jimmy: how fun is that? >> thank you so much.yo >> jimmy: thanso much. hey, thanks so much for playing. "presidential charades," everyone! thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ charades presidential presidential charades ♪ >> jimmythis is pretty fun, guys.ar
11:44 pm
i that lucky charms is giving away 15,000 boxes filled only with marshmallows. [ cheers and applause ] they even have a new slogan. lucky charms marshmallows, they're magically diabetic. [ laughter and applause ] guys, this is very exciting. the first trailer for "toy story 4" came out today. cheers and applause ] which is why everyonork was like, "no, i'm not crying. i wajust -- i was just chopping onions at my desk." [ light laughter ] [ applause ] it's good. but this is real. the movie is about a p fork that becomes a toy named forky.er [ light laug when asked how they came up with the idea, pixar said -- "it just came to us." [ laughter and applause ] well, as i mentioned, tomorrow t first day of spring. and even though it's exciting to get some nicer weather, it's always tough saying ye to winter. so, if you don't mind, i've got to do this real quick. ♪ >> jimmy: hey, winter.k look, i th both know that
11:45 pm
things are over between us. but i just wanted you to know, i don't have any bad feelings about you. i mean, you were great. it's just -- things change, you know? [ light laughter ] seasons end. ooh, this is tougher than i thought. [ light laughter ] one second. ♪ hey, spring. [ laughter and applause ] looking good. looking real goo i just wanted to let you know that me and winter are officially over. so, you know. ♪ [ light laughter ] we had some good times, winter. i mean, new year's, the super bowl, baby shark but, come on, february is the shortest month. not that length matters, it's just, you know -- [ laughter ] look, i found a new season. ♪ and its name is spring. and it's got me sprung. [ light laughter ] ♪ so, good-bye winter. i'll see you around. ♪ and spring, i' see you tomorrow as soon as my zyrtec kicks in. yeah. [ cheers and applause ]
11:46 pm
thank you for letting me do that. listen to this, guys. erread about a man in nebraska who was arrested ae tried to rob a papa john's using a pair of drum sticks. het he didn't really catch cashier by surprise, 'cause before he started, he went "1-2-3-4. give me all your money." [ laughter and applause ] 2. 1-2 -- stick 'em up. laughter ] here's a big sports today. the l.a. angels signed outfielder mike trout to the biggest contract in baseball history, worth $430 million. wow. 430 million. in a related story, a hot dog at an angels game now costs $3.2 milliug. [ er and applause ] gimme a little extra mustard on that. and finally, you guys, march madness is kicking off this week. and there are so many amazing ayers in the tournament. but i noticed that if you combine some of the players venames, you can create an more likeable player. i'll show you what i mean.
11:47 pm
for example, if you combine mississippi state's quinndary weatherspoon with maryland's reese mona you get reese weatherspoon. >> steve: oh. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: if you com sne new mexite's trevelin queen with yale's wyatt yess, they become yess queen. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: no answering ahead of time, but thank you. [ light laughter ] if you combine kansas state's mike mcguirl and murray state's devin gilmore, you get lmore mcguirl. [ cheers and applause ] i love that show. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: up next, if you e combnnessee's jordan bone with kentucky's immanuel quickley, you get qu kley bone. [ laughter and applause ] and finally, if you combine temple's shizz alston jr. with washington's matisse thybulle, you get thybulleshizz. there you go. [ laughter and applause ] stick around. we'll be right back with kobe bryant, everyone. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
11:48 pm
♪ pardon the interruption but this is big! now with t-mobile get the samsung galaxy s10e included with unlimited data for just $40 bucks a month ohh yeah! ohh yeah! ohh we hide hotel names, so you can find four star hotels at two star prices.
11:49 pm
♪ h-o-t-w-i-r-e [dophin making] e-e-e-e ♪ ♪ pan pan pan paaaan what makes digiorno crispy pan pizza different than delivery? ♪ pan pan pan paaaan you bake it fresh in its own pan! giving our digiorno pizza a crispy, caramelized crust. ♪ paaaan it's not delivery, it's digiorno. (v...especially when your easily distracted teenager has the car. the worst... at subaru, we're taking on distracted driving [ping] with sensors that alert you when your eyes are off the road. the all-new subaru forester. the safest forester ever.
11:50 pm
[female voiceover] with the penfed car buying service from penfed credit union, you can get rates as low as 1.49% apr on new vehicles. and everyone is welcome to apply. visit penfed.org [music]
11:51 pm
[female voiceover] today, people across the nation are experiencing the benefits of joining penfed credit union. with the penfed car buying service, they're finding the right car at a better price. and everyone is welcome to apply. join today at penfed.org ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we are joined right
11:52 pm
now by one of the greatest players in the history of the nba. he's also the only professional athlete in history to win an academy award. today he's got a brand new fantasy fiction novel out called "the wizenard series: training camp." please welcome back the most sting man in the world, kobe bryant, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪>> immy: they love you. kobe, they love you. we love you. welcome back. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you, thank you, thank you. >> jimmy: thank you so much for doing the show. last time i saw you didn't have oscar. you have an academy award? cheers and applause ] ♪ >> it's crazy man. it's crazy. >> jim: what's that feel? we were talking about the -- the
11:53 pm
film, and then for it to get nominated, it was ju -- a goal in itself. >> yeah. >> jimmy: but then you won. >> what the hell, right? [ laughter ] >> it's just one of those things, man, whereou play basketball your entire life. >> jimmy: yeah.n >> and tu move on to something else. and you wind up working with eat people. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and the next thing you know, you're sitting at the osc -- i mean, i was sitting there with vanessa at the oinars like "what he hell are we doing here?" [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: how did i get here? >> yeah, what -- meryl streep is right there. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: speaking of surrounding yourself with good people, who are these young ladies right here on the cover -- >> the one with the eyebrow th there and alattitude, that's our middle daughter gianna. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and this is our basketball team. these are the girls i coach every single day. ve>> jimmy: you coach them single day -- [ cheers and applause ]s ho to have kobe bryant be a coach? how are you as a coach? i mean, you work with some of the best. what do you -- >> i mean, listen, we practice every day.
11:54 pm
>> jimmy: you do? >> yes, so like, gianna wants to have two kids that want to go to stanford. some want to go to notre dame std play. and it's like, ", three days a week ain't gonna get you there, right? you got to really work." and so offense.triangle im j an, that is insane. >> yeah. >> jimmy: does phil jackson know this? [ light laughter ] >> he -- so, he does actually. the girls really ran like a really complicated triangle offense sequence. >> jimmy: ah, it is tricky. >> it is tricky, and i sent him the video of them running it. >> jimmy: did you really? >> i did and he was like, heh, my gosh,ran it beautifully." and i was like, "yeah, wofl, they kinot a better coach." [ laughter ] it's okay man, it's all right man. >> jimmy: that's so cool that you did that. pegot to say congrats to you and vanessa, you're ing another girl. another bryant. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> yes, four girls, man. four girls. >> jimmy: four girls? >> four girls. >> jimmy: all women in t house, dude? >> i spend most of the time at the house literallsetalking to . [ light laughter ]
11:55 pm
i think they're listening -- >> jmy: oh yeah, they are. >> and they just go off talking about something else, and i just face the wall. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: wow, that is gonna be wild man. >> it's nuts. xc's awesome though. >> jimmy: are theyed to get a sister? >> yeah, they are. really, really excited. our eldest -- her and gianna both do a great job looking out for bianca right. >> jimmy: it's the best news, having a baby. >> it's awesome, man. >> jimmy: it's the gt. i heard somewhere that you said that your youngest daughters, you're not even gonna, like -- you don't want them to really know you as an nba legend or ur basketball past. it's like -- you think they are gonna know you you as something different? >> yeah, they'll never actually see me play. you know what i mean?li so they'll b, "you play ball? what?" ][ talking over each othe what? whatever. i can out shoot you. you know, like that sort of stuff. yeah, because bianca's two, so she doesn't know me as a basketball player. w jimmy: you think they k like a writer and director and producer. >> how about that? >> jimmy: i think that's pretty cool. i like thaee [ ] that's amazing. i'm pretty sure they'll know you
11:56 pm
as a basketball player too. [ light laughter ] i want to talk about this. this is awesome. i ththe "wizenard" series. now, this is a mix of fantasy, almost like i'd say "harry tter" or "game of throne mixed with basketball. >> yes.es yeah, i had toibe it to somebody when i first came up with the idea. keey're were like, "what is it? you got to give elevator pitch, elevator pitch." >> jimmy: what can you pitch me in an elevator? >> "harry potter," olympics had a baby. this is what we're making. [ laughter ] they look at me "it's kind of weird but okay, i get it." >> jimmy: that is what you made. >> yeah.o >> jimmy: and wesley king? >> wesley king's the author. you know, just brilliant. this is five books in one. so it's told from the rs ctive of five different athletes. and he managed to write five books simultaneously, he's just absolutely brilliant. i don't know how he did it. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: it's amazi >> but he did it, yeah. >> jimmy: there's great stuff in re, if you like that fantasy world and wizards.
11:57 pm
but also, really good advice and coaching stuff, things you do learn if you're on a good team. >> well yeah like important thing in this story is the story of self acceptance. we all have fears and we all have anxieties and things of that nature. we can't ignore them. when you ignore them, they fester and they have control over you. what these young men have learn through magic is how -- have the courage to face those fears. and use those fears to themselves be better basketball players and better people through it.jo so that's the ney. >> jimmy: that's right, good for you. [ cheers and applause ] "the wizenard series." actuallyi heard that you were thinking maybe making this into a broadway production? >> yes. >> jimmy: really? >> yes. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: you might be getting someone to help out write some of the songs? >> somebody standing -- sitting right over there. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] i mean, listen. as a lyricist, he's extremely well known. >> jimmy: yeah. he's the best. >> he does okay. right? >> jimmy: he does okay.
11:58 pm
>> i'm like, you know, if i'm going to go to somebody to write this thing -- >> jimmy: you go to the best. >> come on. >> jimmy: oh i see whare going to do. you got the oscar, now you're going to get a tony, and then you're gonna get a grammy. you're going to be the athlete to ever have an egot. [ light laughter ] that's going to happen.rk y words. there you go right there. [ cheers and applause ] i'm so hapra for you. co on the baby. >> thank you. >> jimmy: congrats on the oscar. congrats on the book. kobe bryant's new book "th wizenard series: training camp"y is out t "saturday night live's" aidy bryant joins us next after the break.k stound, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪or maybe it's because he
11:59 pm
♪he needs me he needs me he needs me he needs me he needs me♪ ♪music playing the future. what we deliver by delivering. is raised with no allantibiotics ever. chicken, [ music winding down ] they're a great decision for snacktime. allowing the band to practice at your house... not a great decision. keep it real. keep it tyson any'tizers.
12:00 am
i'myou pick it up. up. i'm not picking it up. well, somebody's gotta pick it up. i'll pick it up. ty're clean! ♪ cuz my hiney's clean ♪ oh yeah, i'm charmin clean t t's how i know they're clean ♪ (vo) charmin ultra strong is woven like a wash cloth and just cleans better. ♪ yeah, i'm charmin clean the kid does have a point. (vo) enjoy the go with charmin. and for an extra clean finish, try charmin flushable wipes. ♪ oooooooooo... ♪ i'll show you something ♪ neeeeeewwww. ♪ i'm gonna make you ♪ moooooove. ♪ i'll show you something, i'll show you something... ♪ ♪ neeeeeewwww.
12:01 am
and this phone is terrible. i pay too much ♪ i'll show you something, i'll show you something... ♪ (paul) you should really stop overpaying for wireless. (sprintern) and upgrade to the brilliant iphone xr with sprint. (sassbot) yup, both an unlimited plan and iphone xr for just $35 per month. (mom) wait, both for that price? (son) both? (dad) both? (baby) both? [gasp] (mom) her first word! (paul) and you get both on sprint's network built for unlimited. (vo) switch and get both an unlimited plan and iphone xr lease for just $35 a month no trade-in required. for people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay.com
12:02 am
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our next guest is an emmy-nominated comedian who you know from "saturday night live." she also produces and stars in the new series "shrill." all episodes are available now
12:03 am
on hulu. everyone, please welcome aidy bryant. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: aidy bryant. >> hi. >> jimmyi love you, pal. so, welcome to the show. >> thank you. >> jimmy: nice so see you as always. you brought a picture which madh me l because you've been traveling a lot. >> yeah. >> jimmy: talking about "shrill." were you in south by southwest? >> yeah. i've been in austin. i've been all over the place just promoting the hell out of this show. >> jimmy: good. it's working whatever you're doing, pal. >> thanks. yeah, but, you know, it's a lot of, like, time zone switchg, and you get kind of out of it. i have colds constantly. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and i finally came home. i was like, "ugh, some rest." i was, like, walking my dog at night and i saw th man in a car sort of li peering down at me.
12:04 am
i was like, "okay, i have a stalker, a creep is here."ug [ light er ] and he's going to kill me. and he had, like, a little puffy coat on and it was just his eyes, like, peeking over. and i was so freaked out. >> jimmy: yeah. iz and then i got a little closer, and i re it was a bag of soccer balls. [ laughter ] jimmy: yeah. >> so, the next day my husband sent me a picture and was like, "he's still out hereaiting for you." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: tell us what you think. you said you brought the photo. >> doesn't this sort of look like a man in a puffy coat? [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i guess, i mean. i guess at nighttime it could be. >> those are soccer balls. >> jimmy: they're just a bag of soccer balls. >> it's just a bag of soccer balls.la hter ] >> jimmy: well, you're being stalked by a bag of soccer balls. i'm so sorry to tell you that. thank you for bringing that. i've known you for years. you do great work on "saturday night live." seven seasons, we've done stuff together >> yes. >> jimmy: you've been nominated for two emmys. >> i know. >> jimmy: hey, well done, pal. [ cheers and applause ] not bad, that's the wao it. >> congrats on this.."
12:05 am
>> oh, thanks. >> jimmy: not only do you act in this but you're also a producer on this one. >> yeah. >> jimmy: how's that feel? >> i mean, it's very weird to be ke, "i'm the boss." [ laughter ] you know? >> jimmy: yeah. >> hello, i'm the boss and i'm -- i'm not -- i think i'm just learning how to be a boss. like, even the first week i took the whole cast -- we were like, "well, i've never been to a strip club. we're in portland. that's what you do." [ laughter ] and then, as i was there and just boobs were flying, i s like, "i'm their boss." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: this ia -- >> i brought them here, and suddenly, and it was, like, full nude.li and i wa, "okay, i'm a bad boss." [ laughter ]o and i need better. >> jimmy: yeah, no. well, i've only seen the first episode, but, man, you're fantastic in it. every reew is -- oh. >> jimmy: how does it feel? are people coming up to you telling you that they love it? g. yeah, it's so overwhelm i thought i was making, like, this little show for, you know, a little group of ladies, and it's really kind of blown me
12:06 am
away.pl and, like, pare sending the sweetest messages and feeling so inspired. so, that's the best. i mean, yesterday, a lady stopped me, crying, on the street. and i was like, "oh, we're oment on sixth avenue." [ laughter ] yeah. and i fully started crying too. and i was like, "welre doing this." [ laughter ] i'm in it. >> jimmy: that's the great thing about new york city. >>eah. >> jimmy: you can just go -- your fans come right up to you and go, "hey, i love that thing."st and you alk to them. >> it was the nicest think ever. >> jimmy: it is the greatest. can you set it up? what is this show about for everyo y? h, yeah. so, it's based on a book and it's basically about a fat woman who's spent her whole life trying to literally make herself smaller by dieting. and also to just try and like make herself smaller in her personality.y and she finand of reaches a breaking point and is like, "i'm not going to do this anymore, and i'm gonna put all that te and money and energy into achieving my dreams instead of counting calories." d it's a true story and it's really fun to watch. [ eers and applause ] >> jimmy: you want to set up the clip at all?
12:07 am
>> yeah, so, i think in this clip, my character works at sort of an online paper. and she's been writing articles that are getting a l of, like, heat. but they also are getting some trolls. so, she's trying to de with her trolls. >> jimmy: here's aidy bryant in the new series, "shrill." take a look at this. >> hey, maureen? we have a little i.t. issue. >> drop it on me, baby. >> okay, do you have any idea how we might find the real identity of someone who's trolling me in the comments? >> yeah, i can do that, yeah. >> wow, i wish i would have done that when i had a troll. >> you had a troll too? >> it's a nightmare. >> yeah, yeah, because i'm a woman that plays video games so men on the internet want me to die. or some of them want me to get naked but then they want me to die. >> god. well, how did you make it stop? >> i changed my avatar to a picture of bradley cooper in "american sniper." >> so smart. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: jo, we love jo firsetone. >> the best!
12:08 am
>> jimmy: the greatest. aidy, your new show is about ng to ing shame and lear embrace you who are. >> yeah. i think it's a nice alternative to hating yourself all the time. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yes, it is exactly. i think that's great, because sometimes people just keep their emotions bottled up even though it feels so much better to let it out. you know? >> yeah, yeah. well, have you ever tried doing a "hey, world?" >> jimmy: no, what is that? >> oh, okay, well, "hey, world" is when you shout your deepest confessions and insecurities out to the whole dang world. you know, just own it. it feels really great. >> jimmy: can you show me how it works? >> oh, sure. so basically, you just look out and you scream something that you've kept inside for a long time. so like, i might say, "hey, world! i once had a full make out session with someone w youtube video of rodeo bloopers was on in the background." [ laughter ] eaah, i feel better. >> jimmy: did thaty happen? >> yeah, baby. >> jimmy: i want to get in on this. let's do this this. hey, world, here we go. [ cheers and applause ]
12:09 am
♪ ♪ hey world the world the world hey world the world the world ♪ ♪ >> hey world my first time at the emmys, i was so hungry i ate a hot dog it the lobby bare i'm gorgeous. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey world, the other l day ked an inch long hair from my earlobe.lo an inc hair from my earlobe, world. that shouldn't be possible. [ cheers and applause ] >> hey, world.tr y think that diarrhea is a beautiful word. [ laughter ] and i uld not rule out naming my daughter or son diarrhea. [ lahter ] ldcheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, wmy doctor told me i have acid reflux and i shouldn't eat spicy foods before go to sleep. but the other night i ate a giant bowl of penne in bed and then put the bowl on my end table and fell asleep.! i loved
12:10 am
[ cheers and applause ] >> hey, rld, when i was five i did not understand what hard boiled eggs were. i thought they were going to hatc so i took some and i pu them in a bush in my backyard. and for days i brought them water and food. and i would sing to them. and then i went outside and they were covered in maggots and i m screamed fdad and i watched as he shoveled away my children. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, wld, ever since i became a dad i basically stopped eeping. i am so tired all the time. the other day my daughter snuc into bed with me and my wife, fell asleep and peed the bed. i was so tired that actually thought to myself, "if my wife doesn't wake up then i'm going to keep sleeping in these pee-soaked sheets." that's how bad i need sleep. i don't care if i sleep in pee! [ cheers and applause ] >> both: hey world, it's aidy
12:11 am
and jimmy. we're going to do it one togeer, because why not? it feels good to have a friend you can shout stuff to the world with. i'll admit, it hurts our voices a bit but it's totally worth it. because it's fun and cathartic. okay? that's it, that's everything. we're done now. see you later. bye world! [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: wow. i aidy bryant, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] her new show "shrill" is streamg on hulu now. stick around, we'll be right back with natalie morales, everybody. [ chee and applause ] ♪ ♪ microsoft artificial intelligence, we will be able to detect new flavors in a split second
12:12 am
and develop better beers faster. with ai, we redefine what's possible. so cheers! rewards me basicallyaptain everywhere.obvious and hotels.com so why am i playing the pug bongos at this destination wedding? because hotels.com lets me do me. where my dogs at? oh, here they are. hotels.com. you do you and get rewarded. goodreally? [sighs] ♪ have you tried merrick yet? we get it ♪ you got it [sighs happily] we're petsmart people know aflac... aflac! ...but not what they do. so we're answering their questions.
12:13 am
aflac is auto insurance, right? no. uh uh. is it homeowner's insurance? no... uhuhuhuh! is it duck insurance? nope. ahhh! do they pay me money directly when i get sick or injured? yeah. aflac! you got it. you know aflac! boom! get help with expenses health insurance doesn't cover. get to know us at... aflac dot com. when a stuffy nose closes in... (whimper) breathe right strips open your nose up to 38% more than cold medicine alone. (deep breath) breathe better, sleep better. breathe right. breathe better, sleep better. come on...come on... come on... (buzzer sounds) to keep your sandwich freaky fresh®, jimmy john's only delivers within 5 minutes of the store... no! and not farther. it's nothing personal. it's because sandwich. ♪
12:14 am
our thickest, toughest wipe... tackles any mess. (butcher) we both know you're not just looking for pork chops. you're searching for something more... ...red-blooded. right this way. you thirst for adrenaline, you hunger for raw power. well, you've come to the right place. the road is yours, dig in.
12:15 am
not all water is created equal. there are over 326 million trillion gallons of water on earth. but only one billionth of one per cent is filtered naturally beneath the earth, with a distinct balance of minerals, and emerges crisp and refreshing enough
12:16 am
to be called deer park®. deer park® 100% natural spring water. born better®. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hello, everybody. we've got some great shows coming up the rest of the week. tomorrow night, i'll be talkingm to hammer. and thursday we have
12:17 am
julia louis-dreyfus. and on friday, norman reedus will be here. [ cheers and applause ] a itreat week. and be sure to tune in next monday. we're going to shoot an entire show on a samsung galaxy s10 plus smart phone. i'm going to be going around the htty doing stuff late at n i might even go to a bar with conor mcgregor.s? who kn [ audience oohs ] it's monday march 25th, so check it out. it's going to be fun. stick around, we'll be right back with natalie morales, everybod [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ oh oh oh oh oh ♪ it's taking over ♪ there's no esca ♪ you better get moving ♪ ready or not ♪ it's about to go down here it comes now ♪ ♪ get ready ♪ it♪ oh oh oh oh down here it comes now ♪ ♪ oh oh oh oh
12:18 am
♪ get ready ♪ moving ♪ ready or not ♪ get ready ♪ oh oh oh oh oh ♪ hey (woman) (mp.) what shoroad t do with it first? (woman) yes. (woman) off-road tri (couple) [laughter] (couple vo) whoa! (man) how hot is the diablo chili? (waitress) ll. you've got to sign a waiver. [laughter] (ranger) you folks need bear repellent? (woman) ah, we're good. (man) yes. (vo) it's a big world. our new forester just made it even bigger. (woman) so what should we do second? (vo) the 2019 subaru foresterdv the mostturous forester ever. ♪ are unnecessarily cut down to make toilet paper.
12:19 am
don't people know that seventh generation's tp is made from 100% recycled paper? ♪ ♪ because it's not a tree's duty ♪ ♪ to clean that booty. ♪ it's really quite absurd ♪ that a home for a bird ♪ would be used to wipe a turd. ♪ ♪ am i right? ♪ ♪ i said am i right? ♪ ♪ now i'm not trying to be pushy. ♪ really guys don't push, it hurts. ♪ but use recycled tp on that tushy. ♪ yeah maybe it's a little scratchy so what do be a baby. ♪ caring for the next seven generations. ♪ that's a lot of butts, y'all. and i like butts. save your tree friends. follow mike the tree.
12:20 am
the way you triumph over adversity. and live your lives. that's why we redesigned humira. we wanted to make the experience better for you. now there's less pain immediately following injection. we've reduced the size of the needle and removed the citrate buffers. and it has the same effectiveness you know and trust. humira citrate-free is here. a little change can make a big difference. humira can lower your ability to fight infections.
12:21 am
serious and sometimes fatal infections, including tuberculosis, and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver, and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores. don't start humira if you have an infection. ask your doctor about humira citrate-free. here's to you. ♪ mmm, exactly!ug liberty mutual customizes your car insurance, so you only pay for what you need. nice! but uh, what's up with your partner? oh! we just spend all day telling everyone how we customize car insurance because no two people are alike, so...
12:22 am
limu gets a little confused when he sees another bird that looks exactly like him. ya... he'll figure it out. only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ ♪ pardon the interruption but this is big! now with t-mobile get the samsung galaxy s10e included with unlimited data for just $40 bucks a month
12:23 am
♪ a [ cheers alause ] >> jimmy: our next guest stars in the new comedy series called "abby's", which premieres next thursday, march 28th at 9:30 p.m. right here on nbc. please welcome natalie morales, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> oh, terrible. >> jimmy: what are you talking
12:24 am
about?ha >>s terrible. >> jimmy: no, it's fantastic. >> no, there's a backstory here. >> jimmy: yes.he >>'s a backstory here. >> jimmy: please tell me the questlove backstory please. >> okay, so, a few months ago i was on a flight from finland too miami. you know, popular flight.>> immy: yeah. >> it was a long overnight, as you can imagine. i went there to see the northern lights. they're very beautiful. and i was exhausted. and everyone was quiet. it was all sleepy. the lights were off. and there was a guy behind me, s this fguy who was talking to his friend. but for some reason every minute -- every minute or so, randomly, he'd be like -- ♪ ole ole ole ole ♪ [ light laughter ] on the plane behind me for ten hours. [ laughter ] i don't know what disease that . >> jimmy: i don't know. i've never heard of that. no, i don't know what -- >> and so, i tweeted about it, and i was like, "how do you kill someone on a plane without anyone knowing about it?" and quest promised me that if i
12:25 am
ever came on the show, that ng.ld be my >> jimmy: there it is. he's a man of his word. [ chee and applause ] >> there it is. >> jimmy: welcome to the show -- >> thank you! >> jimmy: natalie morales. th is your first talk show ever? >> it is -- well, late night. >> jimmy: yeah, i'm excited, yeah thank you. i'm really excited, too. >> jimmy: i'm happy that you're here. do you ever get confused with -- there's another natalie morales -- >> yeah. >> jimmy: -- at nbc. >> yeah, constantly.my >> jyeah. >> all the time. >> jimmy: on the "today" show -- >> even the "today" show -- >> jimmy: "access hollywood" -- >> yes, even the "today" show he tweets me as own natalie morales all the time. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: they get it wrong? >> last week! last week. yes. >> jimmy: you're joking. >> no, i'm not. i'm dead serious. it hpens all the time. >> jimmy: have you ever met each other? we love natalie. >> we did. we did. she's grt. was actually -- i was promoting "battle of the sexes", a movie i did a couple years ago. and i sitting in my hotel room getting ready and i looked out the window and she was right there interviewing steve carl. and i was like, "what bizarro world is this?" >> jimmy: there's two natalie moraleses right here. yeah. >> yeah, yeah. it's weird. it's kind of like on "friends"m like, joey's hand twin. what do you do with that? [ la we just have the same name and
12:26 am
it's like -- what? there's nothing we can do. we're just like "hey, cool! hi." >> jimmy: that's true. >> we're both usually annoyed by what happens. >> jimmy: oh, good. i want to see you guys together. >> yeah, i get her baby gifts, sometimes she gets my auditions. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: fantastic, why not? speaking of auditions, tell me" about "abby' i'm very excited about this show. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's on nbc. it's at 9:30 on thursdays.>> es. right after "will and grace." it's huge. >> jimmy: that's a big deal. >> jimmy: are you excited about it? >> i'm so excited. i mean, i grew up watching thursday nights on n >> jimmy: everyone did. >> i know, it's crazy. >> jimmy: explain what the aow's about? >> basically, itut a bar -- a backyard bar. an illegal backyard bar san diego where a bunch of friends hang out. i play abby, who owns the bar in her backyard. we shot the whole th outdoors. >> jimmy: you shot the whole thing outdoors? >> yes, at universal studios. >> jimmy: what was that like. >> it was awesome. except for the, sometimes, interruptions.me sometis you interrupted us. because the tram rides at universal studios have jimmy's
12:27 am
voic >> jimmy: oh, yeah. [ light laughter ] oh, no. i'm sorry. >> no it was great.>> immy: so you'll be doing a scene, all of a sudden you hear -- >> they're were like, "hold for jimmy." and it's like -- >> jimmy: and to your left you'll see "jaws" -- the shark from "jaws." >> yep! >> jimmy: no way. >> that's exactly it. >> jimmy: oh, i apologize to everyone on the crew and staff of "abby's." >> it was really fun. it was really fun. >> jimmy: so, it's called "abby's" and it's an outdoor r. and i know mike schur is producing this. >> yes. mike schur who created "parks & rec" and "the good place." he's our executive producer. iud -- >> jimmy: he's a g >> he's the best. >> jimmy: i love that guy. he's the best guy ever. please give him my best. >> i will. >> jimmy: i want to show a clip re. >> sure. >> jimmy: this is natalie morales in the new comedy series, "abby's." take a look at this. >> is this a bar in my aunt's backyard? >> what? [ laughter ] no, no, these are all just my friends. yeah. >> we all know each other -- >> i'm her emergency contact. >> yeah, we just like hanging out like this l together in a group. >> with a cash register. >> i collect old cash registers,
12:28 am
as do many other people. >> what people? >> people. the -- i shouldn't have jumped in. [ laughter ] >> could i get a beer, please? >> sure, man, here you go. >> three bucks, right? >> whoa, well there friend. why are you giving me money? [ laughter ] mi casa es su casa. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: me casa es su casa. i also want to -- want to know that you're the first cuban to lead a sitcom on television -- t on netwoevision since desi arnaz. [ cheers and applause ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: from "i love lucy." >> yeah. thank you. >> jimmy: that's got to feel good. >> thanks, it does. >> jimmy: best of luck with the show. >> thank you. >> jimmy: "abby's," everybody. natalie morales. [ cheers and applause ] sdbby's" premieres next th at 9:30 p.m. on nbc. we'll be right back with music ybom fletcher. stick around, evy. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪
12:29 am
why are all these business owners so excited? 're going to comcast. it's ahead of the game, ahead of the curve. it's going to add to the productivity of our business. it's switch and save days at comcast business. right now, get fast, reliable internet for $49.95 a month and save $600 a year. just one more way we take your business beyond. but hurry, switch and save days ends april 7th. internet that's reliable. internet that's fast. that's super important. i just want to get it right now. call today. comcast business. beyond fast.
12:30 am
12:31 am
12:32 am
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, this is my jam of the week. i love this song so much. making her television debut, performing her hit "undrunk", please welcome the birthday girl, fletcher! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪ wish i could get a little undrunk so i at five in the morning i would unlove you ♪ o♪ honestly this partyr h
12:33 am
everyoe should have gone home but i'mg afraid of beber ♪ ♪ 'cause the first thing i when i'm alone i start looking through all of the photos ♪ ♪ that you used to send m i should have deleted but kept it a secret that crazy to do ♪ ♪ so i squeeze out the lime on the ice of my drink and the juice hits the ts on my fingers ♪ ♪ it still doesn't burn as mucas the thought of you ♪ ♪ wish i could get a little undrunk so i could uncall you at five in the morningi would unlove you ♪ ♪ but some things you can't undo i wish i could unkiss the room full of strangers ♪ ♪ so i could unspite you unlo my temper but somethings you can't undo and one of them's you ♪ ♪ i'm afraid to turn the lights on i don't want to
12:34 am
face this rebound ♪ ♪ is it weird if i come over i wa to but i know that she's around ♪ ♪ so i'm looking through all of the photos that you used to send mee i should havdeleted ♪it ♪ but kep secret is that crazy to do oh i'm hungry and wasted and my hands are shaking♪ ♪ i shouldn't be cooking but spilling hot water it still doesn't burn as much as the thought of you ♪ ♪ wish i could get a little undrunk so i could uncall you at 5:00 in the morning i would unlove you ♪ ♪ but some things you can't undo i wish i could unkiss the room full of strangers ♪ ♪ so i could unspit you unlose my temper but some things you can't undo and one of them's you ♪ ♪ been through every emotion right now i'm sad and broken like the bottles on the floor and i'm to buzzed ♪ ♪ to clean them up wish i could get a littlerunk ♪o i could
12:35 am
i could unlove you ♪ wish i could get a little undrunk so i could uncall you ♪t ♪00 in the morning i would unlove you but some things you can't undo ♪ ♪ i wish i could unkiss thel room f strangers so i could unspite you unlose my temper ♪ ♪ but somethings you can't undo and one of thes you ♪ ♪ i wish i could uncall you you i wish i could unlove you you ♪ ♪ wish i could you you i wish i could unlove you ♪ [ cheers and a >> jimmy: oh, come on. fantastic!
12:36 am
thank you so much. happy birthday. fletcher, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] "undrunk" is out now. my thanks to kobe bryant, aidy bryant, natalie morales. fletcher, once again! [ cheers andpplause ] and the roots from philadelphia, pennsylvania. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. hope to see you tomorrry. bye-bye, edy. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
12:37 am
♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- jordan peele -- creator and star of "fleabag" actress phoebe waller-bridge -- chef and auther action bronson, featuring the 8g band with fred armisen. ♪ [ cheers and applause ]di and gentlemen, seth meyers. et >> good evening. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] that is wonderful to hear. in that case, let's get to the news. president trump yesterday tweeted a picture of a signed heck that he wrote donati $100,000 of his annual salary to the department of homeland security.

88 Views

info Stream Only

Uploaded by TV Archive on